sabina21: you will soon find out.
kera69love: it will be revealed.
Sorry for the delay in this, been hectic with life, anyways here's the next chapter, let me know what you all think!
The devil within 2 ch.12
Usagi POV
I watch as Rei gets up front of everyone and looks slightly different. A little more confident to be in front of people than she did before. Whatever Jadeite said to her after we left must have done it for sure. I look over and see Jadeite, he's proud Rei is looking less nervous and more excited about the rest of the concert. It's then that Rei begins to sing one of her songs. I can see this song holds dear to her heart.
The rhythm is soft and slow at first to capture the emotions and lets you listen to the lyrics as you see the importance of the words and the story they tell. The girls and I are getting into the song, enjoying how it starts to get more upbeat as Rei clearly gets more into it. When she starts to hit higher notes I can see how she's pouring herself into the song, how the notes are sharper now.
More alive and the emotions she's pouring into it. She wants people, the audience to feel what she was writing, the story she's telling within the song. She wants everyone to feel all of it and it makes me happy to see her so open and vulnerable because it's making the song more engaging to listen to. Judging by the slightly different coloration of the red band she had wrapped around her head for her hair, she's getting a little sweaty.
I glance towards Mamoru who looks like he's even feeling it. In fact as I look around, not one of the guys seems to be absent from listening and are very attuned to the song and its message. I smile back knowing that we're all here, in this moment with her, just as everyone else in the auditorium is. It's a beautiful scenic moment full of positive thinking and allows for the mind to feel at ease.
For just a few more moments things are at ease. For just a few moments there's no thoughts of cardians, or those two aliens. It's just us. That however wasn't to last as within seconds, a scream pierces the air and a monster, no…a cardian appears. It shatters the atmosphere with its loud screech making people cover their ears up from the sound and destroys the ambiance Rei's song was creating.
One second Rei was singing her heart, her soul out, the next second, bam! It was shattered.
"Son of a bitch!" I snapped, pissed off that this, such a wonderful moment was ruined by the two asses that wanted to steal more energy. Son of a mother fu… I wanted to curse out the heavens that they took this from us.
"Can't have one moment of fucking peace," I add on and find Malachite looking to me.
He's obviously shocked by my language, but then turns around and remarks, "Knew you had a sharp tongue princess."
I rolled with the punch of it and felt everything around me tense as I scanned for the best entry and exit points for people to take, "We need to get these people out of here so we can get rid of this thing."
They all hear me as people are already fleeing the scene away from the monster. We're all on alert now. The cardian targets Rei for some reason and flies towards her. People temporarily stop moving as they see it's intended target isn't them right now but her. With all eyes between her and it Rei doesn't dare transform. For a second I almost ask, why when it hits me.
"Shit! She can't transform." My words are low still though, hesitant to be louder in fear of being heard.
It's Nephrite who remarks, "Not with that thing targeting her we need to divert it."
Instead it's the long whip from the isle that loops around the tail of the cardian that was aimed at hitting her dead and gives Rei a chance to take off. That's when we see off to the side Jadeite transformed and uses his whip on the creature to protect her. The masses have had a chance to realize she's gone and the monster is on the loose again.
One glance between her and Jadeite and she bails off stage to go and transform away from the masses is all it takes.
"Never a dull moment," Malachite grumbles in sarcasm.
"When is it ever dull?" I nearly ask but it comes out more sarcastically. We duck into the chair area to find a way to leave, but the amount of people that are screaming in panic and damn near climbing over each other to get out is getting worse.
Their rushing to get out is creating a bigger issue and jamming the doors up. It's turning into a madhouse and it's becoming unsafe for people. It's when the creature starts trying to seal the doors with its own powers that I watch the guys spring into action and go to each of the double doors they can get to so they can use their human strength. To avoid being realized for who they are, to keep them open for people to rush out.
"Hell! Can't hold it much longer," Jadeite calls out as he flings it the best he can, which isn't much as he's one person.
"Who are you telling?" Nephrite demands as the doors are trying to close up from the sticky crap the creature flung at it. I look over and see the sticky crap is like its own organism and is trying to reach out and bind the doors together.
"Unbelievable." Ami says as she sees it too.
"We need to get everyone out," I say as I try to guide the fallen to the ground so they can get out too. Just as I help one lady up, I get flung to the side. I hit a folding chair which is definitely not comfy only to be grabbed by the neck, picked up and smacked in the face by the pink alien which gets me flung again and this time I crash into a set of seats breaking them. I wince as I get up and see her.
"You again," I mutter as she looks at me with a smug smile. Question is, why the hell does she seem bent on me all of a sudden? She doesn't know who I am as a senshi…or does she? Not willing to think too much into it as I don't have the time I snip back, "I'm going to enjoy wiping that smirk off your face…"
I can't reveal too much till I've transformed and hidden this identity from her. I duck from another hit and take off running as she calls behind me, "I knew you were a coward Usagi."
I can't help but look back as she searches for me. "The hell…?" I mumble. Seriously, how'd that pink haired bitch know my name? Does she really know me and is playing with me or something? It throws me off for a moment, but I can't risk getting hit again. I take the cover as an opportunity to transform.
I see most of the civilians are out by this point and the guys have used all their human strength to keep the doors open. I look at them as they're trying not to let the sticky stuff trap them so I know I have to act fast so they can use their powers to escape. I slip around the corner as the pink alien bitch keeps shitting random areas that I just evaded. Now as Sailor Moon I can be faster and more discrete.
"Come on out you little bitch!" She is still striking at the seats when I leap up and hit her from behind stunning her. I did what I needed to do though.
I got her attention, "Who you calling a bitch, bitch?"
She screams a similar one to something I've heard before but where? Before I can think of it she goes in to tackle me. I leap frog back till I hit the stage and just when she's about to try to land a strike on me her counterpart shows up.
"What are you doing here? We're supposed to be in the shadows?" he demanded of her as she snaps back, "I'm doing my job in getting rid of these pests. You need to stop being so passive."
Just as he's about to protest she cuts him off, "Don't try to say you're not cause you are." That's when instead he asks, "What happened to all the people for energy?"
At this she looks a touch caught off guard.
"The cardian is over there doing that job. I'm…supervising."
I arch a brow at her, "Supervising? You call attacking students here supervising?"
She sends a blast my way, but I dodge it. The problem is while I'm dealing with them everyone else is dealing with a cardian that needs to be turned back to a card. However this is, could be fruitful to learn more about them, and the girls and Mamoru have it with the cardian…for a while anyways.
"Shut it blondie!" she snaps at me. "These simple people you're protecting are nothing more than meat or cattle per say to us. Including you!"
She tries to hit me again only this time in a rare chain of events as I dodge the cardian, dodging others attacks, comes into the line of fire and gets hit by her blast. I see the legit 'oops' enter her face,
"Damn!" she swears, "You were supposed to take energy not take on a hit from us."
The cardian looks at her, pissed now even at them. In a rare shocking moment I watch as the cardian goes to attack her. My jaw drops a bit as she vanishes as well as he and the cardian meets a wall. Knocking more rubble down in its path it looks for them,
"This is different." I hear as I nod my head in agreement.
"Looks like she pissed off her own monster," I remark as her male counterpart pulls out his flute and plays on it. For a brief few seconds it's like watching a pungi, or a snake charmer, use his flute to charm the cardian back into submission. It looks like it's getting lulled. Thankfully I'm not the only one who sees this as Mars and Jupiter use their powers to hit the thing from behind. It breaks free of the flute's hypnotic flow and causes it to try to attack them again. However this time they seem to vanish for good.
"Damn," I groan as the cardian comes after us. The two aliens are gone now so it's just us versus this thing. I watch as the doors are now sealed shut by us so that it doesn't escape and terrorize the outside where police and paramedics have probably been called to help out.
"We need to end this fast so that people don't get back in and get hurt," I tell the girls,
"She right, a big event like this will draw in local PD, we can't afford that," Zoisite says as he throws out a blast himself too.
We keep hitting at it with our powers as it throws out attacks too but it's at this rate, easily outnumbered by us all. Now that were not worried about people on the inside anymore and the doors are now sealed we can focus solely on it and nothing else. It tries to attack us multiple times but it's running out of steam and where to pissed off to relent. I even threw out my tiara to wrap around it.
It breaks the hold, don't get me wrong but not before it hits both fire and ice. The creature is now both burned by the heat but also the extreme temperature of the ice as well. The creature manages to get Mercury pinned to the wall but Zoisite unleashes a powerful hit that knocks the creature off its balance and gives Jupiter a chance to zap the sticky from her as Mars melts the rest off as she's gained more control over her powers.
Jupiter throws her thunder at it as Nephrite adds his powers and both hit the creature's powers in deflect making both sets get blown back a bit. It seems the creature now is just trying to hit our powers with its own to cancel them out. That's when I start to see that while its energy is running low it's trying to repair itself. Trying to heal itself and the lack of damage being done to it now is helping.
"Enough of this." I go to use my moon wand when I hear the words, "I knew we should have used a better card."
I look over and sure enough the pink one is back with her male counterpart.
"You're the one that picked it," He remarks as if to remind her that this was on her choices not his.
I know it's pointless but I have to try, "Or how about NOT stealing peoples energies." Startled by my words he looks down at me.
"There has to be a way to co-exist here." I'm starting to sense that perhaps the male is open to it when the pink one says, "I'm not good with sharing and I don't like you. You keep getting in our way and ruining our chances of - "
That's when her partner puts his hand over her mouth, cutting her off. What was she going to say? "What she means is we work better alone."
I shake my head for a second realizing this is going to be a long battle. "Then be prepared for a world of pain because the more you fight against us the harder it will be for you to be alone cause we will never stop doing what's right to protect this world. This is our home and we will fight to protect it and its inhabitants."
I can see I've made the male think on this as he's looking at me hard, contemplating my words as they vanish as a unit. I can only hope now that they heard my promise and will heed me.
I look over to see the cardian still fighting, yet I want to see if those two can be tracked. "Mercury Jupiter, we've got this thing, you two go track them down." They don't even question it and take off.
The cardian says it's first words then, "Seriously?"
That's when Mars adds insult to injury, "She's right we've got this." Giving me a 'we got this' expression. The cardian sees this and realizes it's not being seen as enough of a threat anymore to warrant all of us to take it on so it lets out the queen of all monster screeches.
It aims its next attack directly at Mars. This makes Venus knock her out of the way before Jadeite cuts off the attack with his sword. I see something emerging within him I haven't seen in a hot minute that I nearly forgot what it looked like. Jadeite suddenly unleashes an angry slash with the sword that is glowing profusely with nega-energy. I can't close my eyes at the sight as it's clear as day to see.
There's no way to try to see otherwise. I watch for a few brief moments as he lets it out and slashes at the creature. His anger is evident as he uses his nega-powers to save Mars and beat back the creature.
"The…actual hell…?" I recall that energy signature very, VERY well. It's ingrained into my memory from all the battles fought and won over the existence of it. I can only imagine how Mars must be feeling in these moments.
To know that her love Jadeite is still evil. That I failed her. I don't know how but I know somehow I failed her in this. I look over to Mars expecting shock, anger or confusion at both he and I in this, yet I see none of that. I just see her looking at me with an expression of sorrow, sympathy and remorse.
NO….no…no…no…no…no! My brain is refusing to configure this. She knows?! NO! What the-NO! I healed them. How is this possible?
"Sailor Moon I…," she tries but no words come out initially. I want to say something, I open my mouth to do so, but then a much larger blast comes in and hits the creature as it prepares to land a massive blow on Jadeite. While he was holding his own he takes a few brief seconds to make sure that Mars is out of range. She may have help right now, but I can see that she's a bit winded and even a tad hurt from the fight.
However, those few seconds cost him. Just as the creature pulls out a weapon of its own to slice Jadeite up with, I see a blast coming in and hitting the creature. It knocks it to the point it falls off stage and into the chairs. Looking a tad dazed and definitely hurt at this point I look up to see my Tuxedo Mask, my love, my price and soul mate amped up from his own powers and the flash of a massive nega-power ball hitting the creature as it cries out in anger.
Right now there's no sounds hitting me, only static. It's like my mind has blocked everything out and I'm falling into this abyss of emptiness. The creature sees me and as if on autopilot I whip out my moon rod and use it. I send my anger into the rod and it takes it out and transforms it back into a card. Just like that the sticky goo is disappearing and those that were attacked by the creature slowly come to.
Yet I'm still stuck on this stage, still in a state of shock. I tell myself to breathe in and out so that I can process what I just saw. I look up at Tuxedo Mask as he helps his brother up and even nods to Mars as she gives him a knowing glance. I see his confusion at first till he looks over and sees the expression on my face. He knows I know. I can see the filter of emotions hit him hard as he debates on what to do and say next.
"I had t,." Jadeite tells him as if to say 'I'm sorry' to Tuxedo Mask or I guess, maybe a still nega infused Endymion. I lower my scepter as I loosen my grip. I can barely feel it against my gloved fingers. That's when I notice Venus and the 'oh shit!' expression hit her as well. She cringes as I look at her. No words have left my mouth as I look over at Mars. The two people here that I would have thought would have the most to say in this are wordless as the silence begins to sound too loud now.
I can't seem to grasp anything right now, not until Malachite and the rest of the guys come up on the stage. Venus pulls Malachite to her and before she can say a word, he notices the tension around us all. He doesn't say a word, as the tension is thick enough for a serrated edge to get through it. It hits me then and there that they all knew…all of them…my trusted friends and allies in this war against evil all knew.
The guys were never cleansed of evil…I failed them, and they never told me the truth. Instead, everyone I knew lied to me…what kind of leader am I if the ones I love and care for lie to me to such a degree? I want to turn around, to yell, to run, to snap, but I can't make myself move from the spot I'm in. I look at these people, the ones I love as an extension of my family, and see the regret, the anger at themselves for keeping it from me.
I look them over once more and see them, I really see them now. I see the confusion, the anger, regret, the pain, and yet I also see relief in their eyes and sadness. Suddenly I remember back when Mamoru had or still has Endymion as being evil inside of him. Of myself maintaining that whole thing as I trained with him, loved him, cared for him, protected him until things were exposed to the rest.
I sigh as the fight begins to drain from me. Do I really have any bones to throw at them considering my one deception to them at the time? I kept Endymion a secret from them for a while too. Or most of them anyways. So maybe I had this coming. Maybe this is a punishment for me keeping him a secret when I did and for ousting Luna as I did. Yes she and I are on better terms but…oh shit LUNA!
It's as if all her words came back to hit me at once. I look up at Tuxedo…no Endymion then, masquerading as Tuxedo Mask. It's there I see the biggest dose of sorrow and fear hit me as I see him. His fear is so palpable I'm feeling it too. The fear of losing me from finding this out. I can almost feel his tears form as he tries to talk, to say something to make this better and yet no words are spoken…the grip on my scepter falters and I don't have the instinct to grab it in time…before it falls with a loud clatter.
Evil Endymion POV
I can see the emotions crossing her face. It's so many and hitting her so hard that I don't think I've ever seen THAT many emotions cross her face before. There's confusion, then betrayal, the glimmer of understanding, as she's trying to put herself into our shoes with this, then there's guilt which for the life of me I can't comprehend. She has no need to feel any guilt at all so where that's coming from if anything I have the most guilt to bear here.
I curse myself for letting out a power hit with my nega-powers, but Jadeite was hit and about to be hit again. I want to be angry at him but even I know I can't be. He is one of my brothers after all, and our youngest to boot. Plus, he was protecting his love as I would have done the same for mine. No question I would have done it in a heartbeat if my Moon Senshi was on the ropes herself and needed backup.
Besides, he already used his nega-powers on the monster as a defense mechanism, but as he stipulated, he didn't have much of a choice. Perhaps we got to cocky with our powers, or to at ease with using them and faltered on which ones to use or maybe…maybe we finally had a chance to have a decent, normal day and evening happen and once more we were proven that we weren't allowed to have even something as simple as that last for to long.
Perhaps we were unconsciously tired of keeping it a secret or perhaps our anger at our loves getting caught up in a fight while protecting innocents did it…or maybe all of it. All I know is I can't solely blame him for this. I see my Moon Senshi trying to keep it together right now as it legitimately looks like we all kept this massive secret from her. In the last five minutes since the creature was destroyed no words have been spoken.
Honestly a pin could drop and it would be the loudest sound in the whole space and this was a BIG space. Yet no one spoke a word. No one dared to utter a sound. Hell the air was even starting to crackle with energy it was that quiet. I realized it was so quiet that we could hear the sirens in the distance. We couldn't stay here much longer. We all do what we can to maintain a private life…police involvement doesn't help.
Yet we all knew what was going on and it seemed everyone in the auditorium, even the innocents that may be lingering around to watch this unfold, are too scared to even release a sneeze, let alone breath a word. Too afraid it would break the delicate atmosphere that hung around us all so heavily. When I realized it was starting to feel like I couldn't breathe anymore I knew I had to be the first one to talk.
The silence was too loud now. Taking the biggest breath I can, I open my mouth to say the only words I can think of to say.
"I wanted to tell you…we all did…," I begin with the only words that come to mind. They feel cheap and cliched, even over-used, but my head is spinning just as hers is. I'm trying to get my point, our point across to her so that she doesn't feel even worse than she already does.
She stiffens up as if preparing herself, for what though we don't know, she even seems unsure of it. I feel Malachite coming up behind me.
"Princess…," I know it's serious talk if Malachite calls her princess during a battle. She's not a fan of the title since she's grown and matured as she has, and has taken on some serious responsibility, but she takes it as an honor of her former life, the one that was stolen from her.
"We were waiting for you to get stronger to be able to heal us all," He tells her, his words full of truth that I know she can see in his eyes. It was true…at first, then I got selfish and stupid and kept listening to that other voice in my head. This whole fucking thing blew up in my face and now here were the consequences of my actions. Moon looks from me to Mars. Mars' voice is crackling with her own level of fear and heartache.
"I wanted to tell you…so much…," her eyes were beginning to water and as she got to her feet I could feel my own eyes begin to water up. "But every day that went by, it just felt like if I did it would make it worse.…"
I could see it in her face, the fear of losing her friend, one of her best friends, and the heartache of living with knowing it might have been preventable had she just told the truth.
"So you kept it from us?" Venus asked…she then looked at me with contemplation. Trying to hold my ground even though it feels shaky, though it's not the ground that's shaking. It's me and all of my feelings hitting me at once.
"We did it for a multitude of reasons," I get out, my voice cracking a bit and my throat feeling dry. It's then Moon speaks up some of her feelings now that she's had a chance to process some of this. Yet it's not to the girls just yet, but at me, no she has her own words for them.
"So instead of being upfront with ME, your girlfriend, your EVERYTHING as you've put it several times, you hide this from ME?!"
The emotional damage is hitting me hard. She's desperately trying to hold back her own tears, not wanting to let out her emotions and let everyone around her see her in such a state. Her voice goes back and forth between yelling at me, to a soft rage that's filled with her grief, betrayal and anger. Her fist grip is flexing over and over again so much so that I wouldn't doubt it if her knuckles were hurting her from the pressure she's exerting, but she's ignoring it as the pain of this is much worse than anything she's felt as a physical pain.
Not all wounds are physical…I shut Mamoru up. I'm really not up for a lecture right now.
So when Moon looks at me, her angry eyes pleading with me, commanding me not to lie to her any further, she asks one question, "So when we were up at the arctic, my attempt to heal you failed and you didn't tell me?"
I swallowed a heavy lump in my throat and suddenly I wished for the ground to swallow me up.
"Please tell me I'm wrong," She pleaded in a low crackly voice.
That's how low I felt right now. That's how fearful I was of her if she decided to reject me now after all of it. She gave a heavy swallow and after a moment of my silence said, "What kind of relationship do we have if you can't tell me the truth?"
She's not wrong…Mamoru tries again as I shut him down again.
You did this to her…you all did but you're the worst of all…you were supposed to protect her from all of it…it's a tiny little voice inside of me that is even older than Mamoru.
I feel it now as it's the part of myself, the part of me, prince Endymion, that has loved her from the start now voicing itself after it got infected by Metallia.
You are the author of your own unhappiness and of hers…she trusted you. The voice is only telling me the truth, but I still want it to stop. Just so I can get my explanation out there, to let her see my fears, my own insecurities in this.
I step forward and thankfully she doesn't step back. I need to do this and honestly it's a long time coming.
"I wanted to, but I knew that if I did, you'd see me differently." And it was true, but not in the way I imagined it. I imagined she'd be fearful of me, or hate me, no this was worse. She wasn't fear or hatred that she had in her eyes, it was disappointment and betrayal she had in her eyes towards me.
I looked down at the crackling powers in my palm.
"When it first happened…," I began wanting to make sure she understood why I did what I did, "The powers that I have now as who I am make me stronger than I was as Tuxedo Mask by myself." It's an unfortunate truth. "I can help you better, I can be more effective in battle, we all are."
I could tell the guys were skeptical around me but still stood by me in this as they still kept it a secret but mostly because they wanted me to tell the truth.
"I didn't want to have to lie to you, but you were also at that time weak still from the Arctic trip, too weak to heal us all. When you got your power up, I was so happy for you and knew that the time for us to be healed was coming up but..." And here's where it hit home for me…for us all.
"Go on." She orders gently. Somehow, I feel like I'm on trial for my lies and deception and she's debating on allowing me to live…though I know she'd never kill me, perhaps I just feel like dying right now.
"But I didn't want to give up the advantage that having the powers gave me. I'm weaker as just plain Tuxedo Mask than I am now. I can't deny that I wanted to tell you but at the time I found out Luna was still on a mad quest to eradicate me and mine, our only saving grace was Mars." That's when her gaze shifted towards the miko. I sense a 'thanks' from her before she takes on the rest of the brunt.
Her expression is teary eyed as she faces Moon. "You have to understand Sailor Moon, I wanted to tell you, it was screaming in my head to tell you but...I was afraid."
Moon turns towards her, not giving her a friendly pat on the shoulder but a chance to explain herself. I know Moon doesn't see it right now, but she's owning the 'Queen of all' expressions and stance. No one but no one is questioning or standing up to her.
Only giving her the details she's asking for and needs to make a decision on what she wants to do next. It's one of the first few times I've seen her channel her inner Queen, her mother would be proud of how she's conducting herself.
"Afraid of what Mars'?" Its then that Mars responds to Moon with, "Of how you'd respond."
However, the confession doesn't take away Moon's ire and only makes her ask, "Then why did you lie to me…to all of us?"
Mars response is simple, "Cause when we were up there, in the Arctic, you were down and beyond passed out, unable to stop what was to happen next. You were a lump, a very powerful, but very passed out lump who couldn't make any decisions at the moment."
I hate to say it, but Mars is very right in her words. Moon was so beyond passed out it took hours for her to wake up if not longer.
"Luna was seemingly crazed with her own delusions at that point, Endymion was terribly wounded, we were all exhausted from the final fight with Metallia. I saw Luna as she demanded to know if you had been successful in healing them. I saw her face Sailor Moon, she was crazed with her ideals."
I can't help but recall that and remember clear as day just how nuts that feline seemed to be during that time.
Moon sees the shear stress levels in Mars at what she had seen when Moon was passed out. It was at this moment that I saw the slightest glimpse of give from Moon. She saw the strain keeping it from her had on Mars. Mars must have seen it too as she added, "I saw the generals that were there, and lastly but most importantly I saw Endymion. How he held you, how much you obviously meant to him...mean to him."
Both her and Moon look at me as I let her see my own fear, anxiety, love, the devotion I have for her that will never stop no matter what decision she makes. That's when I see the next faltering break. She knows I love her, but she needs to know that whether I'm good or evil, I will always love her. Nothing will change that or break it…or erase it. Beryl tried and it failed miserably for her.
"Luna didn't as she was too blind to see it, but I did. I did…," Mars' voice gets soft as if she's finally telling Moon something that she didn't want to see or admit to. Moon looks to her as I see the love of sisterhood speaking up, "If I spoke the truth back at the Arctic then Endymion was going to take you with him."
A tear spills from Mars at this. It's a rare sight to see her get emotional and Moon knows that better than anyone. Yet Mars is being completely honest despite any previous feelings she had or has had before and it being totally open. So with a sad smile on her face she tells her, "Sailor Moon he wasn't going to let you go for a second. You weren't just his protector and only believer at that point, you were his guiding light to a real future."
Moon sniffled just the slightest bit and did what she could to force the tears that threatened to spill back.
"And the generals would have defended your absence and prevented us from getting near you." Moon looks up and they can't deny it as they merely look at each other and notate to one another how accurate Mars is right now. "It would have made Luna feel more confirmed that they were all evil and had taken her charge as proof of it."
She was absolutely right in this assessment of us all, I couldn't deny it.
"There would have been no convincing her otherwise. She's just as stubborn if not more stubborn than you are." The joke falls flat and is more of a fact being exposed. "I made the call I made to protect everyone here. I knew that Endymion loved you, loves you, he'd do anything for you."
Moon looks to me a tear finally escaping her eye as she holds firm trying to not express herself right now.
"Hell he escaped the nega-mental hell that Beryl and Metallia tried to throw him into," Mars exclaimed to her. "Because of you...for you."
Her voice softened up, "So when Luna asked me if they were still with nega-energy, yeah I lied, and you know what…" She looks back and forth between everyone in the room that's a part of this as if she's coming to a conclusion that I'm not sure I'm going to like. "I don't regret a minute of it..."
Moon looks at her in shock as do I but I see the expression on her face. It's one of careful thinking, deep planning and looking back on all the facts. Mars here is looking at this objectively so that she can show Moon why she did what she did.
"I may have wished and wanted to tell you, but knowing then what I know now, I don't regret doing it cause, as much as I hated it, it was the right call to make."
She looks to Moon square in the face as Jadeite goes to Mars's side, backing her up on the matter and looking at Moon with a serious stoic expression. "Sailor Moon it's been killing her not to say anything, but she knew you had to be at a higher power level to heal us as it's five people to heal and not a direct strike to take someone down."
She hears his reasoning and his words as she looks upset at everyone here. I can see her confliction and anger rising up but it's also a lot of information to take in just a few minutes as we give her the information she needs. Though in hindsight it was stupid to do it here where police could come in now at any moment. Another mistake made due to my stupidity. I watch her pace about back and forth as she tries to figure it out, to discern what her next move, her next course of action should be.
She takes a few steps forward, stops then turns back around, she then stops with her hands on her hips now as she asks very bluntly with tears streaking her eyes as even she's human.
"Am I not doing something right?"
This catches me off guard as I don't know how to respond to that. Nor does it seem anyone else does. They are looking at her confused as am I.
"Am I?" she asks.
"Sailor Moon…" Mars tries but Moon pulls away. Mars steps back this time not wanting to push her further and frankly I think Moon needs a little bit of space right now.
"Cause otherwise all I can think is that you should have said something." She ends it on a near scream. Her eyes bore holes into me as I see her emotions ready to erupt from her. She looks at everyone there, sees them all with all of it the information out and is trying to remain rational I can tell but at this same time is beyond upset by what she's learning about this.
"I'm your leader! Your princess! What good can I possibly do if those that I trust with my LIFE, with the lives of CIVILIANS, are threatened by dishonestly. By…by betrayal…"
The girls shy away, feeling their friendship and sisterhood taking a hit due to my actions. I step forward wanting to redirect her anger to me, this is my fault not theirs.
"Don't take your anger out on them, it's my fault."
She looks at me, with glassy eyes and I can see her throat swallowing just a bit.
"I...I talked them into keeping it longer, blame me for it," I tell her, not wanting to cause any more discord.
"Even if you told them to keep it silent, I've known them longer than you, they should have told me." Her words cut deep but she's telling the truth. She's known them longer and been friends with them longer than anything with me.
Please do what's right in this and find some way to make up for it. Beg, grove, begged to be cleansed now so that she can see that you can be trusted.
I can hear Mamoru beseech me to do the right thing and at this point I don't care if she hates me for life, just as long as I can regain her trust and get her to see that everything had the best course of intentions, they just got warped by my own selfishness to not feel weak…a weakness that was brought on by the evil within me who had me convinced of what I was doing. I have to fix this at all costs.