Dr. Huang hadn't expected to hear this name.

But in total this entire evening had gone against all of his expectations. Every time he thought he knew where Olivia's story was headed she would surprise him by taking it in a whole other direction.

He had known of course that Elliot and she had had a falling out. He'd heard rumours, but he'd never thought the two detectives would actually cross this line.

Not only because they were professional, but because they had always been such close friends.

Olivia was still sitting in front of him with an empty expression, staring off into nothing.

"Ok." He said and she looked at him. "Tell me about William Lewis."

Chapter 4: Hello Darkness

I've seen dark before,

but not like this.

This is cold, this is empty, this is numb.

The life I knew is over, the lights are out.

Hello darkness, I am ready to succumb.

"The next Right Thing" – Kristen Bell. [Frozen 2]

I had taken up running.

Anything at this point anything to keep my mind distracted from my obsession with Elliot suited me just fine.

The case of Babs Duffy was still fresh on my mind.

Do you ever get a gay vibe from me? / Would it matter if I did?

Would.

It.

Matter!

Meaning it would make no difference in whatever our status was. Meaning he didn't care. Meaning he was happily coupled with his wife and after being his shoulder to cry on for so long he was done with me.

Prick. I thought. He is such a prick.

I loved him so much it was making me physically sick. I missed him more than I could ever put into words.

I hadn't seen him outside of work in weeks.

When I heard the two girls screaming for help I was already running towards them. The man was zipping up his pants, but I had seen enough. It was a cold February Sunday morning in the park there were a few witnesses around. It was just his luck that I was here.

"Police!"

He wanted to run, but I was already full on sprinting. There was no chance for him to escape and he knew it.

"Don't run!" I yelled and he turned around to me.

The man was good looking in a obvious way. He looked like a regular Joe, they guy next door, the friendly barrista at your everyday coffee shop. When I met his eyes I saw something so dark inside of them that I backed away instinctively.

"Hey. Officer!" He chuckled obviously entertained. Self-assured, I thought, he's talked his way out of situations like this before. "Is there a problem?"

"It's detective." I panted and turned to the two girls who were looking at us wide-eyed.

"This is all a misunderstanding–"

"Save it." I interrupted him. "You're coming with me."

"He exposed himself." One of the girls told me. She was a heavy accented voice. From Germany or Switzerland.

"Officer!" A woman cried out. She was carrying a camera. Her eyes were wide with fright. She had seen what I had seen in his eyes as well. This woman was older, she had grey hair.

"I have the assault on camera!" She announced and the guy scoffed.

"Assault?" He repeated and sounded amused. "Let's not overreact..."

"I'm taking you to the precinct." I said and got out my handcuffs.

"Come on!" He cried out. "This is ridiculous!"

The near-dead look in Olivia's eyes was worrying him.

"Olivia, you had so much inner turmoil when you first met Lewis. That must have been difficult for you."

She looked surprised now. As if she hadn't thought of that. As if the concept of her inner turmoil was secondary in this story. As if that wasn't the whole point.

"Yeah." She said. "It was tough. But Elliot was there. We were in this together."

"You called us all in on a Sunday for a lewdness mis-D?" Elliot asked and he sounded frustrated.

I wondered how he had spent his Sunday Morning. Breakfast in bed, playing with the Eli, making love to his wife?

I had ruined everyone's Sunday off. But I was beyond caring.

"But there's more, ok?" I turned to the Munch and Fin because I could tell they weren't buying this. "The perp, William Lewis – if that's his real name – he's got no ID, he's unemployed, he says he lives at a house in Brooklyn. I've got a call in–"

"So he has a record." Cragen tried to help me out.

"Yeah, he should, but I can't find anything, because I can't run his prints."

"What are you talking about?" I saw the shift in Fin's eyes, saw how he was beginning to understand that this was serious.

"They're burned." I explained. "Both hands fresh." Fin, Munch and Elliot looked at each other wordlessly. Beside me Cragen stiffened. "He claims it's a kitchen accident."

"So he deliberately burns his fingers, and goes into the park to...flash?" Elliot didn't sound convinced.

"He was just getting started. I think he was gonna go and assault those girls."

"And you chased him down?" Elliot asked looking me up and down in my running gear.

Not in a sexual way, God forbid he would actually see me as anything more than his partner.

"Well not everyone spends their day off being lazy." I smiled sweetly and while Fin and Munch snickered, Cragen said:

"Okay. But who is that in my office?"

"That's Alice Parker." All of us turned to the lady sitting anxiously in the other room. "She's an eyewitness. She caught him on her camera. She says she's seen him there before." I turned to my squad. "And look, guys, I know we were all supposed to have the day off but I just want to get the witness statements ASAP. You know, I'll take the perp."

"Just slow down." Cragen said. "Slow down, Liv."

"Captain." I lowered my voice. "I've got a feeling about this guy."

"I get that." He said and looked at Elliot. "Elliot, you and Munch go in. I want fresh eyes." He looked at me. "You had a run-in with him. You and Fin talk to the girls."

"Captain, I doubt he'll talk to just men." I said and beside me my partner nodded.

"Let Liv take a shot at him."

Despite his personal desinterest in me I was overwhelmed with my positive emotions toward him. Elliot had my back. We looked at the captain and finally he sighed.

"Fine. Go. Since you've made her comfortable in my office, I'll talk to the photographer."

Elliot and I smiled at each other and then went inside the interrogation room together.

"William Lewis." Elliot said. "I'm detective Stabler."

"Nice to meet ya." Lewis looked amused and studied me. "Couldn't face me alone, could you Darling?"

"It's detective." I repeated my saying from the park and he rolled his eyes.

"Mr. Lewis." Elliot sat down in a way that was calm and controlled. "Why don't you tell us your version of events? What happened in the park?"

"That old lady, she's got some kind of problem with me." He sighed. "But honestly I don't know why."

I looked at Elliot briefly, but he was focused on Lewis.

"I mean I've never spoken to word to her."

"Yeah, but you do know her, right?" I was pacing the room. I couldn't sit still with this guy.

"I..." I could tell he was getting nervous. "I run along that pond. She's always out with her photos."

My heart sank. I ran along that pond too and I saw Mrs. Parker there every now and then as well. He had a way to make this go away. He could easily lie his way out of this.

"Uh, well, maybe I accidentally ran through one of her photos."

"Oh is that what happened today? You ran through a photo with your fly open?" Elliot asked no longer playing the nice cop. He could see through these lies just as easily as I could. "You know there are kids playing in that park."

"I explained this to your partner." The way he said the word partner made me uncomfortable, as if he could see we were something more. As if he could tell how much I felt for him. Which was ridiclous of course.

"This...this is such a misunderstanding." He was trying to laugh it off again. "I was out running and I got...uh...chafed and so I had to stop to...to make a little adjustment."

"An adjustment." I repeated.

"Have you tried powder?" Elliot was done with him I could tell. "You know." He said. "These girls say you approached them, exposed yourself and made sexually suggestive comments."

"Do they even speak English?" He asked and the fact that he sounded so relaxed made me angry. He knew the system. He could play us and was trying his best. "They're young. They're from, what, Finland? This is just bad timing. I mean, really, I–" He stopped and tried a different tactic. "What do you say I...I apologize to the and we all go home."

"No, not just yet." I said before Elliot could say something and stepped closer. "Now you said that you went running yeah?"

"Yeah." Lewis smiled. "Sound Body, sound mind."

Oh shut up, I thought.

"You always go running in jeans and work boots?" I sat down on the table to look at him. His cold eyes met mine and I could see it all right there. It was the moment he realized he wasn't getting away with any of this. That we weren't playing his games.

"I'm in-between jobs right now." I scoffed and his eyes narrowed. "I don't have a lot of money to spend on running gear." I felt like laughing again. This guy would use any thing he could as an excuse, as a reason. Even my own running gear.

"I don't think I deserve this kind of attitude, detective."

"So you're staying at a halfway house?" So far he hadn't said anything that actually told us anything about him. He had a record, I knew it.

"Yeah I'm trying to turn things around, I had some problems with pills. After a work site accident." He sighed deeply. "Back pain. It's the worst. But, uh my record was clean, so the judge said that if I did rehab and then went to the halfway that um..my charges would be...uh come one, what do you call it?"

"Expunged." Elliot helped him out and his blue eyes met mine briefly.

"Yeah." He tried his friendly attitude again. Locking eyes with me. "Listen, I...I feel awful about what these girls think happened."

"Do you?" I asked. "Or are you just worried that it's gonna screw up your parole?"

"Well that's my point." Lewis tried to emphasize with me. "I mean, why would I risk my recovery just to spook some tourists? And my mother raised me to respect women."

I didn't reply and looked at him wordlessly.

"Right." Elliot said, also obviously done with his shit. "What about your fingers?"

"Man they hurt. KP duty. It was a hot stove."

"Well, the thing is, with your fingers burnt like that we're having a rough time checking your prints." I said and stepped closer to the table again. "So...would you mind tellin us where you are from?" I sat down beside Elliot getting ready to take notes.

"I'm from...from all over. Texas, Floriday, Delaware. A milizary family. But I've been in New York for the last couple of yours."

"And before the halfway house you live alone? With roomates?" Elliot tried to get more out of him as well.

"With a girlfriend." Lewis admitted. "But we didn't exactly part on the best terms."

He and Elliot looked at each other and I asked. "So how exactly did you...part?"

"You know something, Detective?" He leaned forward looked at me again. The look in his eyes was the one I had seen in the park. There was a darkness inside of William Lewis and it was clear as day. "I'm not getting a real sense of a benefit of the doubt here. I'm entitled for an attorney if I ask for one, isn't that right?"

Elliot looked at me and I knew what he was thinking. We stood up and left Lewis sitting there wordlessly.

"This guys a piece of work." I muttered.

"Good call, Liv." Elliot said.

"How was that for you?" He asked. "That initial interrogation?"

"There was something off about Lewis and we noticed it from the start." Olivia whispered. "I felt safe with Elliot there, but after that things got so bad..."

"Do you need a break?" Huang asked.

"What that monster did to poor Alice Parker..." She shuddered. "It was so terrible."

"Was it worse than anything else you've seen in line of duty?"

She couldn't answer this question. It was hard to rank the cases she worked on. Each one was a real person, somebody whose life had been destroyed. But he had tortured and raped this woman for 18 hours and then she had died.

And he had gotten away with it.

"Tell me about Elliot." Huang helped her out. "I know the details of the case." The dead look in his eyes told her all she needed to know. "I'm familiar with William Lewis."

"You see this Vanessa?" Lewis asked wide-eyed. "You see, I told you."

Next to me Alex flinched. Behind me Elliot stepped closer to the table Lewis and his attorney were sitting at.

"You're right." The young lawyer turned to us. "Mr. Lewis believes that Detective Benson and SVU have a vendetta against him."

"You're unbelievable." I almost laugh.

We looked at each other and I could tell how amused he was by this whole situation.

"You've had it for me from the get." He said.

"Don't engage, Billy." The way she dismissed him had my stomach in notes. The familiarity with with she spoke to this monster. "You've been doing sex crimes for a very long time, and now you're projecting your anger at others onto an innocent man."

Next to me Alex flinched and I felt Elliot's presence behind me as he stepped closer to me.

"Innocent?" I repeated, leaning over the table to get into his woman's face. "Did you see the morgue photos of his last defense attorney?

"Olivia." Elliot muttered, warningly, putting his hand on my arm.

But I was not done:

"The one that he raped and tortured for 19 hours? She was also convinced of her lover's..." I quickly corrected myself: "Of her client's innocence."

Lewis was chuckling, but Vanessa was upset: "Excuse me?"

Alex sent me an angry glare and then announced: " We'll see you in court."

Once we were outside they both turned to me.

"Have you lost your mind!" Elliot snapped.

"Nice fredian slip." Alex sighed.

"It wasn't." I said.

Outside she when we'd reached the parking lot she declared: "I got that. It also means she's gonna fight like hell for him. I'll see you in court tomorrow. Liv..." She looked at me. "Maybe sit this one out?"

"What?! Why?"

She was already walking towards her car, just as Elliot was. I hurried up to him and as I got inside I slammed the door shut with more force than was necessary.

"Sit this one out? Can you believe her?!"

"I can barely believe you!" He snapped at me.

"What? Why?"

"He is a serial rapist, he's a sadist and a murderer and you're putting yourself right on his radar!" He began pulling away from the parking lot.

"Oh wow, El." I laughed but it sounded bitter. "And I assume Ms. Parker's death was her faut too? Because she put herself on his radar?"

"That's not what I'm saying!" He was really upset I hadn't realized before.

"What are you saying, Elliot?" I asked and tried to lower my voice.

"I don't want you to get hurt." My calmness spread over to him. "I don't want anything to happen to you. Perp's touching you, toying with you, saying horrendous things to you..." He stared ahead and muttered: "It makes me sick, Liv."

It was the most honest and intense thing I had heard him say in a while. At work we didn't talk like this. We couldn't.

"It comes with job." I tried to play it off. "And it's no picnic for me either, believe me."

"I just want to keep you safe." He whispered and I realised he had stopped the car. "I worry about you."

"I..." I didn't know what to say. My brain was on an overdrive but I wasn't able to form any words. But it didn't matter, because Elliot continued talking:

"I miss you. I miss spending my evenings with you."

I felt like I couldn't breathe in the best way.

He's married, he's married, he's married...

I don't care. I thought. I can't. I don't have the strength to care any more.

"But between this job and my family its hard to make time for you, even if you are my best friend."

The word friend shot through me like a lightening strike. The emotional pain was crippling. He started the car.

I was silent the whole ride back to the precinct. If I told him I missed him too I would have confessed all my feelings for him in that moment.

Nothing could have held me back.

"Would that have been so bad?" Wuang asked her.

They were both sitting on the sofa now.

Olivia was no longer shaking. Focusing on his direct questions helped her narrative. Deep down in her mind she knew she was traumatized. Knew that her memories were coming back in pieces that her mind was broken.

"Telling him how you felt?"

The FBI agent had made more tea and started a fire. The warmth and orange glow made her feel something, anything other than the aching loneliness that usually came disguised with utter numbness.

"I couldn't lose him." She whispered. "Not as a friend, not as my partner. There was no way. I could either love him secretly and have him in my life as a platonic friend or not at all."

"Those were your only choices?"

She nodded.

"What happened then?"

Olivia was silent for a moment and closed her eyes for a moment. Then she opened then at looked at him.

"I couldn't tell him I loved him." She explained.

Huangs expression was open, non-judgmental as she had come to know him in all their years of working together.

"Lewis was set free." He said, because he knew that talking about the disaster of William Lewis' case wouldn't get them further. "The judge declared a mistrial and he was out on bail."

"Then Elliot showed up at my door." She said. "And told me he loved me."

Hi everyone! Please tell me what you think! Again, it's not Monday, but I am on a roll right now. Thanks for all your support! Also in the first chapter I told you that the story follows Season 11 up to a point. We have reached said point with Lewis appearing earlier on.