Daenerys

Daenerys opened her eyes to find herself staring at an unfamiliar wall, devoid of elaborate tapestries and designs and dimly lit by light filtering through a nearby pair of red curtains. She rolled over onto her back and sat up on her elbows. It wasn't until she realized that she wasn't wearing clothes that she remembered that she had spent the night at Jacen's home.

How could you forget?

How, indeed — it had been the best night she had had in a very long time. Perhaps the best night she had ever had.

She looked to her left and saw Jacen lying on his stomach facing away from her, his back rising and falling gently. His hair was sticking up in all directions, bringing back fond memories of her combing her fingers through it late into the night, long after exhaustion had taken him. She lowered herself back onto the bed and turned on her side to face him.

On some level, she found herself envious of Jacen. He had gotten to experience his first time with the person he loved at his own pace and of his own volition. Her own first time had been… quite the opposite.

Comparison is the thief of joy. A phrase that she had heard many times from Ser Barristan since the early days of her rule, when she would find herself in her small council chambers lamenting that she would never be as successful a queen as her ancestors had been kings. They had come from royalty, and she had been raised as a street urchin until she was sold by her own brother to be a breeding mare for a horse lord. How could she expect to leave a legacy worthy of those who had come before her?

This man loves you, and you love him. Drogo, the Dothraki, and the Free Cities are your past. Jacen is your future. She sighed and banished the thoughts from her mind, though likely not for the last time.

As she stared at his bare back, only partially covered by the sheets, she thought back to the previous night and the intimacy that they had shared. Though she had always known Jacen to be a man prone to anxiety, she had never expected him to be so insecure about his body. She had nearly fainted when she saw the defined muscles that she had felt only recently with her bare hand, but he hadn't seemed to believe her reaction.

Is some amount of discomfort really unexpected, though? She mused. He had never even kissed a woman before you, and you expected him to be comfortable stripping in front of a queen?

Last night, with Jacen asleep on her breast, she had grappled with this thought, only to come to the conclusion that she didn't care. He had opened up to her, showing a vulnerability that no one else had ever had the privilege of seeing. She had held his hand through the staggering waves of new emotions and sensations that he had experienced, and she had comforted him when it became overwhelming. Her patience had quickly borne fruit, as once he trusted her, he had opened up in ways that she had never anticipated, making her feel emotions and sensations that she herself had never felt.

Initially, he had been docile, almost hesitant. Daenerys had wondered how slowly she would need to proceed and how much she would need to guide him. Yet, beyond occasionally asking for permission to do certain things, he had been remarkably forward. Though she had so enjoyed the feeling of him being comfortable enough with her to take charge, she hoped that he would continue to ask for permission on occasion; his tentative requests were almost as sweet as his moans of pleasure. It had made her feel special, knowing that he prioritized her comfort and pleasure, willing to sacrifice his own desires for her well-being. He had been visibly nervous about frustrating or angering her with each of his requests, no matter how small, but each had made her love him all the more and had only fed her desire to make their first time together as special for him as she wished her own had been.

On the other hand, when he had so forcefully pinned her down, his eyes burning with primal desire, she had felt a thrill like never before. His rough hands had gripped her with a force that made her nearly climax from his gaze alone. Yet, she had held on, savoring every moment longer than she would have ever imagined possible.

Unable to contain herself any longer, she reached out and gently ran her right index finger down his back, tracing his spine. She grinned as his muscles twitched and flexed under her touch. When her finger reached his backside, she took it in her hand and gave it a light squeeze. She couldn't resist lifting the sheets slightly and watching her finger trace intricate paths along his backside and upper thigh.

Perfect, she thought, barely stifling a giggle as she traced a finger along a fading red scratch mark, and all mine.

"Hmm?" he grunted, half-asleep.

She ran her hand up his back to rest between his shoulder blades, then leaned forward to rest her head against him. "I love you," she breathed into his ear. The words felt strange yet liberating as they left her lips, a feeling far surpassing anything she had felt the previous night, save only for the warm feeling in the pit of her stomach as the words had been gasped into her ear.

"Hmm."

"Is that any way to answer your queen?" She began tracing her finger along his back again, this time around his right shoulder blade.

"You're not a queen in this bed," he responded, his voice rough with sleep.

She gave a sly smile, wishing that he could see it. "You're right, I'm a dragon," she whispered, nipping at his ear.

He chuckled and turned his head to face her. His eyes were bleary with sleep, his hair a charming mess. Even still, in this state, he was the most handsome man she had ever seen. He stretched and settled more comfortably on the pillow, clearly enjoying her touch.

"A most fearsome dragon," he mumbled, closing his eyes again, "who can be tamed by a blacksmith's tongue."

Daenerys laughed, smoothing down his unruly hair. "Did I seem tamed to you?"

"Briefly," he conceded with a small grin, not opening his eyes, "though I don't think I would've lived to see the end of it if I were ten years older."

"Don't worry," she leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the lips. "We have plenty of time to practice.

"Hmm."

Daenerys leaned into his ear. "You were so eager to make a joke that you forgot to tell me that you love me."

"Does it really mean anything if you have to ask for it?"

"Well, it means that I won't have to force it out of you."

He chuckled again and rolled over onto his back. He then forced an arm under her and pulled her roughly over to him. "I love you," he whispered before kissing her on the top of her head. "More than you can ever know."

Her heart jumped into her throat at the sound of those words, accompanied by the feel of his warm lips against her scalp and his arm around her. There weren't words to articulate exactly what she felt, but she settled for one: contentment. A contentment unlike anything she had ever felt.

"How did you sleep?" Daenerys asked, tracing her fingers lazily over his astoundingly defined abdominal muscles.

"Better than I ever have," he sighed, stretching again. Daenerys felt her pulse quicken as his chest flexed against her cheek. "I hope you enjoyed it, because I'll be expecting that more often. No more of this me holding you nonsense."

"Manhandle me every now and then like you did last night and you can have anything your heart desires," she heaved a sigh of her own, tracing a finger around his navel and kissing him on the chest.

As if in response to her kiss, she saw him slowly hardening underneath the sheets. She turned to look up at him with a mischievous grin on her face, a stark contrast to his own look of embarrassment. She pushed his hand away and sat up.

"Ready for another?" She slowly pulled the sheets back and ran a hand along his thigh. "Clearly we're both curious to see if you can mount a dragon who's refreshed from a full night's sleep."

Jacen chuckled and nudged her hand away. "I don't think so, my love," he shook his head. "I just want to… enjoy being together this morning." He reached out and put a hand on her thigh. "Best to leave that for when we can fall asleep in each other's arms."

"You sound like quite the expert on such matters now," she teased, her voice not betraying the slight disappointment she felt, though she had to admit that he was right — she had loved playing with his hair as they basked in the quiet afterglow of the experience they had shared, and they would hardly have all day today to spend in bed together. She pulled the sheets back up and began to lie back down next to him, but he put a hand on her shoulder.

"Just let me look at you," he said quietly, and she felt her heart start to race as she adjusted herself to face him. His gaze wandered over her body, lingering several times on her breasts. She felt herself blushing furiously, though she also felt strangely empowered under his gaze.

You're the only woman he's ever looked at like that…

The intensity of his gaze far surpassed simple desire or even love. It was an emotion that she couldn't quite identify, and which she was unsure if he was ready to fully express yet, so she simply allowed herself to bask in his gaze and the fact that she was more loved by this man in this very moment than she had ever been in her entire life.

Jacen slowly reached out and ran a hand up her body to rest on her left breast. She inhaled sharply as his fingers passed over her nipple, from a mixture of both discomfort and pleasure. She looked down at his hand and saw for the first time that the bruises and bite marks on her breast had gotten worse since the previous night, though nothing appeared to be a cause for concern.

She grabbed his probing hand and squeezed it, knowing what he was about to say. "It's okay," she said gently. "You asked me if I was comfortable with everything we did, and I told you that I would tell you if I wasn't."

"Don't blame yourself for something I did," he said, his voice carrying a tinge of worry as he withdrew his hand and lowered it to rest on her thigh.

"I'm not blaming either of us," she responded before guiding his hand back to her breast and dragging one of his fingers along the purple-and-blue skin. "If we both enjoy things like this, it may result in leaving behind bruises and marks. If that's not something you're comfortable with, tell me. Never worry about making me angry or disappointing me."

"No, it's not that," he shook his head, watching as she guided his finger across her skin. "I just… don't like thinking that I hurt you, I suppose."

"And I told you that I would tell you if you did, but now I'll promise you: if you ever hurt me, I'll tell you. I said that I trust you, now you trust me."

He smiled and nodded in thanks as he lowered his hand, but Daenerys grabbed it and returned it to her breast. She returned his smile and squeezed his hand before lying down next to him and pulling the sheets up to her stomach as she rolled over onto her back. She felt jolts of pleasure shoot through her body as his fingers gently caressed her, and the feeling was magnified even further when he switched hands and shifted onto his side to kiss her on the temple before beginning to make his way down to her neck. She leaned her head away from him, allowing him full access to her, and a small groan escaped her lips as he reached his destination and began to alternate between kissing her and lightly grazing his teeth across her skin, the sensation enhanced by the feeling of his stubbled cheek against her skin.

They lay like that for some time in silence, save for the sound of Jacen's kisses against her skin and the occasional moan or groan that emanated from both of them. Jacen was clearly enjoying her immensely, and she found this moment just as intimate, if not more so, than if they had been having sex as she had initially wanted. Her bruised nipple throbbed dully with each gentle caress, a tender reminder of the love she had for him and the fervor with which she had given herself to him.

She reached under the sheets and began to trail her hand down his stomach, but he stopped her and gently replaced her hand on her stomach. "This is your time," he breathed into her ear, his breath warm and his voice thick with desire. "Let me."

"What if I want to?" She smiled, though she knew what he would say.

He paused for a moment to bite her earlobe. "Do you think I care what you want?" He mumbled.

Daenerys laughed and wrapped an arm around his neck and ruffled his hair. "No, I suppose not."

As silence descended upon them again, Daenerys closed her eyes and lost herself in the sensation of his touch, gently twirling soft and sweet-smelling locks of his hair between her fingers. As she began to drift off to sleep, his kisses began to slow and his grip began to slacken, and soon stopped altogether as she felt his breath even out with sleep. Daenerys laughed again and gave his hair a light tug.

"Hmm?"

"You fell asleep," she whispered, scratching the top of his head.

"Can you blame me?" He mumbled against her neck. "No better way to relax."

"For both of us," she chuckled. As he began to caress her again, she once again surrendered to the intoxicating whirlwind of sensation. A soft moan escaped her lips and she arched her back off of the bed, pressing her chest further into his grasp. He responded by pulling her even tighter to him. She grasped his hand resting on her stomach and intertwined her fingers with his, and as he squeezed it in response, she felt the warmth of ecstasy start to build inside of her.

"Stop," she gasped, her voice barely a tremor. "Please."

"Why would I do that?" He asked, giving no indication that he had any intention of stopping.

She gave a breathless laugh as she stretched and intertwined her legs with his before closing her eyes and resting her cheek on his head. "Getting close, and I just… don't want this moment to end, is all."

"Agreed," he mumbled, lightly biting her just above her collarbone and giving her breast a final squeeze before stopping his caresses. "The offer's still open for you to abdicate and live with me."

"You're making it very tempting," she grinned into his hair, "but, alas, I must be going soon," she ruffled his hair one final time and slowly pushed him away, the warmth in her lower body dissipating at the thought of financial reports and insurmountable debt. Just as she started to lean up and move out of his grasp, she felt a hand on her collarbone gently pull her back down. She turned to look at Jacen, amused, and saw a sly smile on his face.

"Can I finish you before you leave?" He asked as he began to lightly caress her breast again, swirling a finger around and across her exquisitely sensitive nipple.

"And why would you want to do that?" She asked, her heart pounding in her ears as the warmth began to return.

He leaned into her ear until his lips were almost touching her. "A final reminder that, no matter how many people kneel to you, you will always belong to me."

She took a deep, shuddering breath as she ruffled his hair and smoothed it back down, wanting nothing more in that moment than to mount him and show him that the reverse was also true. "I'd love to, but I can't," she responded glumly. "Some financial reports were supposed to come in last night, and I need to review them as soon as I can to prepare for the next council meeting. Crippling debt to the Iron Bank doesn't pay itself back, you know."

"I suppose not," Jacen gave a small chuckle as he returned his head to his pillow, clearly disappointed.

"This isn't the last time we'll be together," she reached out and ran a hand over his delightfully prickly cheek. "Going without it will just make you want it that much more," she added with a mischievous grin of her own, her pulse pounding in her ears as she was bombarded with lustful thoughts of falling into his arms once again.

Jacen rolled over onto his back and pushed a hand through his hair. "Would you like something to eat before you leave?" He looked over at her.

"I would," she nodded. "Why don't you go prepare something for us while I get dressed?"

Jacen sat up and leaned over to kiss her lightly on the lips before swinging his legs off of the bed. Daenerys couldn't help but stare at his backside and muscular back as he walked over to his dresser and withdrew a pair of sleep pants and a shirt.

"No shirt, please." she said, her gaze unwavering as she sat up and let the sheets fall to her lap. He turned to her with a wide smile and shrugged his shoulders before donning his undergarments and sleep pants and walking out of the room, leaving her alone to collect her discarded clothes from the floor.

Daenerys walked out of Jacen's bedroom, securing her pants and straightening her slightly wrinkled shirt. As she looked around the sitting room, she saw her night clothes folded neatly where she had left them the night before. She gave a small chuckle before looking into the kitchen to find Jacen standing at the counter cutting something that she couldn't see. As she watched him, she found herself wondering how the night they had shared would affect their relationship. She had felt more comfortable and loved in the past twelve hours than she ever had in the Red Keep, and now she was expected to go back? She would never relinquish the Iron Throne for personal matters, but, as she watched this young man prepare a meal for them, she found herself wondering if her life would really be that much worse if she were a commoner instead of a queen.

He looked over at her and smiled. It was a smile unlike any she had ever seen: one of both warmth and love, but contentment more than anything else — as if at this very moment he had everything that he could ever want out of life. She returned his smile as her cheeks began to grow warm.

"I saw a robe hanging in your washroom," she said as she regained herself and walked over to the dining room table. "Yours?" She took a seat and leaned her elbows on the table.

"A gift from one of my nieces, the last time she visited. She said she wanted me to have it on hand in case I ever had a woman stay over," he smiled and shrugged at Daenerys's amused expression. "Just like her mother, she isn't half as clever as she thinks she is."

"Which niece was that?" Daenerys asked, her curiosity piqued. Jacen had frequently mentioned his sisters and their children since they first met, but he had never spoken about them at length.

"Rosalinda — my oldest sister, Rosaria's daughter."

"Are you two close?"

"We are," Jacen smiled fondly. "She's almost fifteen years old."

"When was she here last?"

"Just shy of a year ago."

"Do anything fun?"

"We did, indeed," he nodded vigorously, not taking his eyes off of the counter despite clearly wanting to look over at her. "She usually comes down once a year, and she loves spending time with Alex and some of my other friends. She's always been close with my uncle, so she also spends a lot of time with him when she visits and he's in town. When we're alone, we usually stay up late drinking and just… talking about life."

"Drinking?" Daenerys raised a playful eyebrow.

Jacen shrugged his shoulders with a small chuckle. "An uncle is powerless to deny his niece."

"I can tell," Daenerys grinned. "What about your other nieces and nephews?"

"I'm close with all of them, but Rosalinda is the one I'm closest to."

"Why do you think that is?"

"No idea," he shrugged his shoulders again. "Maybe it's because Rosalinda was my first niece, and she saw me as much as she saw her own parents for the first few years of her life." He set down the knife, picked up two plates from the table, and walked over to her. He set it down in front of her and took a seat across from her. It was a plate piled high with freshly cut fruit of all different types, including a familiar white one with black seeds. She picked it up and raised an eyebrow at him.

"Dragon fruit," he smiled, suddenly appearing nervous as he grabbed an orange slice from his own plate. "I remember how much you liked it…"

"I love it," she popped the small piece into her mouth and ran the tip of one of her feet up his shin before crossing it over her other underneath her chair. "Continue, please."

"With?"

"Tell me more about your family," she encouraged him, wanting to keep him talking about something he was clearly passionate about.

"Well," he began. "Rosalinda has a younger brother named Brendan, who's approaching twelve years old now. My other sister, Jenna, has a son and two daughters — Seth, thirteen; Sophia, ten; and Summer, eight."

"A full house," Daenerys remarked with a smile.

"Very full, yes," Jacen chuckled, "though not nearly as loud as it used to be."

"Can I meet them?" She asked before she could stop and consider the question.

Jacen's eyes lit up, his smile broadening in a way that made her heart skip a beat. "Absolutely. In fact, I want you to meet them before we get married. I know they'd love you."

"I'd love that," she returned his warm smile. "And your uncle?"

His smile faded, and Daenerys saw a brief flicker of pain in his eyes. "Yes…" he said, his voice growing noticeably softer as his gaze returned to his plate. "Soon, I promise."

"There's no rush," Daenerys gave him a reassuring smile that he likely couldn't see. "Whenever you're ready."

As she spoke, she couldn't help but notice the drastic shift in his mood, from elated to somber in a heartbeat, as if she were watching the sun disappear behind a cloud. She felt a pang of concern but decided not to pursue it. These last few days had given her a glimpse into a side of him that few others had seen, and she didn't want to push him away by pressing too hard. All she could do was hope that he felt comfortable opening up to her when he was ready.

"You said you were always close to Rosalinda," she broke the sudden silence, and he glanced up at her and nodded. "What did you mean when you said she saw you as much as her parents?"

"A bit of an exaggeration, I suppose," he chuckled, all remnants of his somber mood gone as if they had never appeared. "I made frequent trips to visit them shortly after she was born. I've always wanted children, and she was, well, a baby."

"What was she like?" Daenerys pressed. "As a baby."

"Amazing," Jacen's face took on a sudden radiant glow. He bit down on a piece of fruit and swallowed it quickly, eager to continue. "She was so small, and I never once heard her cry. When I held her, she used to stare at me with these stunning blue eyes. It's like nothing you've ever seen in your life."

Daenerys smiled and took a bite out of a rather large piece of melon, completely taken by his passion as he continued to talk animatedly about all of the things that had made his niece laugh. The way he talked about her with such love warmed her heart, and it only made her all the more excited to seal their relationship once and for all and build a life together.

If he talks about his niece like this, imagine how he'll feel about his own children, she thought, her heart swelling with emotion.

When the sun rises in the west and sets in the east… All these years later, she could still hear the maegi's words as if she were in the room with them.

You'll have to tell him about it sooner or later…

"It certainly sounds like you think a lot of her," Daenerys ate the remainder of the piece of melon, banishing the troubling thought for the time being.

"Oh, I do," Jacen replied, his eyes sparkling as he took a bite out of a large slice of apple. "I can't wait for you to meet her."

"Neither can I," Daenerys smiled, feeling a mix of excitement and apprehension, though from the thought of meeting Jacen's family or the thought of sharing the maegi's words with him she couldn't say. "Now, tell me about—"

A sudden knock came at the front door, cutting her off and making them both jump.

Lenna told Tyrion. I suppose I should have expected that.

"I'll get that," Daenerys stood up and walked around the table. "It's someone here for me, I'm sure."

Jacen nodded. "Trouble?"

"Nothing to be concerned about," she shook her head, knowing that Jacen wouldn't be satisfied with such a response. She opened the door to find a young man standing on her doorstep, a folded and sealed piece of parchment in his hand. He was visibly nervous.

"Hello, Ryden," Daenerys forced a small smile, genuinely surprised to see him. It was exceedingly rare for servants to perform official duties outside of the Red Keep.

The young man dropped to a knee, bowed his head, and presented the parchment to her in raised hands. "From the Hand of the Queen, Your Grace."

"Stand up," she smiled and took the parchment. "You're far out of sight of the people who care about theatrics."

He stood bolt upright and nodded vigorously. "Yes, Your Grace. Sorry, Your Grace."

"Would you like something to eat?"

He shook his head. "No, thank you, Your Grace. I've been told to see that you open it, Your Grace."

Daenerys sighed internally and broke the seal. It was indeed Tyrion's immaculate handwriting.

Her Grace Daenerys of House Targaryen,

I trust this message finds you well. Given recent events, I request that we call a meeting of the small council to discuss where we stand and how best to move forward.

I suggest this evening, with both of you in attendance. The choice is, of course, yours. The members of the small council have been informed, and only await your approval.

Yours faithfully,

Tyrion Lannister, Hand of the Queen

The letter was short, cryptic, and riddled with the customary theatrics that Tyrion knew she so disliked. He clearly placed little trust in this new servant, which only made her wonder why Ser Barristan hadn't come to her instead.

Daenerys folded the piece of parchment and looked up at Ryden. "Tell Lord Tyrion that I concur, and that I will send word to him as soon as I return to the Red Keep. He should expect to hear from me within the hour."

Ryden nodded, gave another quick bow, and rushed away up the street before Daenerys could dismiss him or wish him well.

Daenerys stared after him until he turned a corner, then closed the door and heaved a deep sigh.

"Everything okay?" Jacen asked from the dining room table.

Daenerys nodded, turning back to face him. "Our presence is requested at a council meeting this evening."

"About?" He took a bite out of a large banana slice.

She gave a small smile as she returned to her seat and set the folded letter on the table next to her plate. "They'll want the status of our relationship and to discuss how best to move forward."

"Is there something wrong with that?"

"No," Daenerys shook her head. "I was just hoping we would have a chance to talk about this alone first."

"We already did," Jacen pointed out. "Last night — we're officially together now."

"I don't mean that," Daenerys continued. "They'll want to know our future plans — getting married and producing an heir."

Tell him.

"What's there to talk about?"

TELL HIM.

Daenerys raised an eyebrow. "We haven't even been officially together for a full day, and you're already open to marrying?"

"We both know that we've been together for far more than just a day, Daenerys," Jacen replied matter-of-factly. "Like I told you last night, I want a life with you. A permanent life, if you will."

She chuckled and picked up a grape. "You know what that means, though?"

Are you going to have this conversation every time you see each other?

"As I said last night, I do, and I have for a long time now," he paused, clearly considering his next words. "Will this be… tomorrow, though?"

Daenerys shook her head, a small grin on her face in spite of the nervousness settling in the pit of her stomach. "No, we won't get married until you're ready."

"And what does 'ready' mean?"

"Hard to say right now, but that will be the primary topic of discussion, I'm sure."

"Will your council be angry?" Jacen asked, his voice taking on the shy and nervous tone that Daenerys had come to know well in their time together. "About this entire situation, that is," he added.

"No," Daenerys assured him. "This is far from the first time this topic has come up, and I think we're past the point of contention. That they want you to come is an excellent sign that they're willing to see this as legitimate."

A sudden long silence passed between them. She could tell that Jacen desperately wanted to say something, but was weighing the words carefully. She picked up another piece of fruit from her plate and took a bite out of it, immediately identifying it as a particularly sweet pear, as she waited for him to collect his thoughts. He took a comically large bite out of a piece of apple before finally steeling himself to speak.

"That brings up one question that's been on my mind lately."

Daenerys nodded for him to continue as she picked up another piece of dragon fruit.

"You're the queen…" He began, sounding unsure, as if he thought his words might hurt her. "Why do you let them order you around like this? Why do you care if they see this as legitimate? Can't you do as you like?"

"Technically, yes," Daenerys nodded, "but a monarch is a slave to tradition above all. Rulers typically only marry members of the nobility, and even then the marriage is more of a political transaction than anything else. Entering into a partnership and eventual marriage with a commoner would likely not be looked upon fondly by some."

Most, more like.

"But you're the queen," Jacen reiterated. "Tyrion and your council are advisors. Don't you have the final say in decisions?"

"I do," Daenerys agreed, choosing her words very carefully. "Tyrion is… a unique case. He hasn't led me astray since the day I met him, and I wouldn't have even made it to Westeros without his support, much less to the Iron Throne. I hold his opinion in high regard and often take his advice because I know that he won't mince words or shy away from uncomfortable decisions to avoid hurting me or my feelings. He cares about me, but he's a servant of the realm first."

"The way you talk about him sounds like you're taking orders, not just taking advice," Jacen responded pointedly, oddly persistent of the subject.

Daenerys sighed, feeling a flicker of doubt. "Jacen, the royal court is complex, and maintaining the stability of a country as large as Westeros even more so. Tyrion and my council ensure that my decisions are accepted by those who could otherwise oppose me. If they have doubts, we discuss them and move forward with a mutually agreed upon plan of action. It's not about being ordered around; it's about sacrificing personal desires for the sake of stability and long-term strategy. I need their backing to rule effectively and to protect our future together."

Polished rhetoric and half-truths… spoken like a true politician, she thought with disgust. Tell him the truth: you're scared that you'll make the wrong decision on your own and turn Westeros into Meereen.

After two years of sitting the Iron Throne and ruling over seven largely peaceful kingdoms, her insecurities still ate at her — the fear of failure; the fear of making a decision that could turn her council, or even Westeros, against her; or, worst of all, fear of becoming her father. Her time in Slaver's Bay had undoubtedly helped her in preparing for such a responsibility, but she occasionally found herself wondering if it had damaged her just as much as it had helped her. She had made what she believed to be just, moral, and fair decisions, and it had ended with the formation of the Sons of the Harpy and their rule of terror right under her nose. She had done everything right, as she saw it, but still she had faced insurmountable opposition from the very people she was trying to protect. She had lost many a night of sleep wondering if Westeros would suffer the same fate, especially in the early days of her reign when the people of King's Landing had made their dislike for her immensely clear.

"Do you ever find it frustrating?" He continued, clearly not satisfied with her diplomatic response but unwilling to press the topic for the time being.

"Occasionally, but, as I said, that's why I listen to them. I have the final say on what happens, but they have as much input as I do in the entire process." She picked up another piece of dragon fruit and popped it into her mouth, savoring the foreign sweetness that exploded on her tongue. "Is there a reason you're bringing this up?"

"I know how much you respect your advisors, and I know how much their opinion means to you," he began, visibly uncomfortable, though he managed to meet her eyes and hold her gaze without blushing. "I also know how unpopular your decision to be with me is. I just… don't want you to risk your position or your life for a relationship with me, Daenerys."

"Jacen," Daenerys smiled and reached out to grab his hand. "Since the day we met, I've tried to talk myself out of this relationship more times than I can count, and Tyrion has had a fair shake at it as well. And yet, here I am." She squeezed his hand tightly. "Forever," she added. "Just like we said last night."

Jacen gave her a small smile and nodded, which Daenerys took as silent acceptance of her words.

"Now, can you promise me something?" She continued, not releasing his hand.

Jacen nodded again.

"I chose you," she said, squeezing his hand with each syllable, "and I love you more than anything. I want you to promise me that you'll try to stop thinking so negatively about yourself, and you can start by allowing yourself to believe me when I say how unbelievably fortunate I am to have found you."

"Daenerys, I—"

She squeezed his hand again to stop him. "No bargaining. Promise me that you'll try. Just try. All I want is for you to see yourself how I see you."

"I promise," he responded with a shy smile, squeezing her hand in return, but Daenerys knew that it was more for her sake than anything else. This would be far from the last time they had this conversation.

A comfortable silence settled between them, the weight of their discussion lingering in the air. As had happened so many times, she found herself drawn into his impossibly deep green eyes. In their depths, she saw reflections of her own hopes and fears about their future together, a future that she so longed for.

Maybe our children will have green eyes… The thought crept unbidden to her mind, but she made no attempt to push it away.

You've managed to find it, she smiled, and she felt her heart melt as Jacen smiled back at her. A man who loves and respects you, has a perfect body, is amazing in bed, knows how to cook, loves his family, and has the most beautiful eyes that you've ever seen. You've got it all, and all it took was a lifetime of hardship and strife to get to this moment.

She was jolted from her reverie by a soft inquiry. "Would you like another plate?" Jacen gestured to her empty plate. She had been so engrossed in their conversation that she hadn't even realized that she had been eating from it.

"I don't think so," Daenerys smiled and squeezed his hand again before releasing it. "I have to get going if I'm going to read over those reports before tonight." She rose and began to walk to the door.

"What time should I be there?" Jacen asked as he followed her and grabbed her coat from where it was hanging near the door. She felt her cheeks grow warm as she turned around to allow him to help her into it, though this was far from the first time he had done this.

"I'll come down and escort you later this evening," she said as she turned to face him and began buttoning her coat. "A long walk does wonders to clear the mind."

Jacen nodded, clearly happy that he would be seeing her again so soon, and pulled her into a hug. "I love you," he whispered into her hair as she wrapped her arms around him and squeezed him closer to her. She could feel his heart beating against her cheek as she pressed herself into his bare chest.

"And I love you," she whispered before scratching his back and leaning up to kiss him on the jaw. When she pulled away, he pulled her back to him and kissed her deeply on the lips. Her arms snaked around his waist as their tongues met and his hands drifted down to her backside. His grip tightened as he lifted her off of the floor, and Daenerys laughed into his mouth and bit down on his tongue before pulling away. He let out a gasp of surprise and lowered her to the floor before swatting her hard on the backside, which, much to her dismay, she could barely feel under her coat and pants.

She looked up at him and grinned, the desire back in his eyes. She wanted nothing more than to allow him to carry her back into his bedroom, but she knew that deferring her responsibilities to spend more time in bed with him would hardly instill confidence in their relationship. She reached up and ran a hand over his stubbled cheek.

"Bring a change of clothes tonight," she grinned before turning around and grabbing her neatly folded night clothes. He only smiled and nodded as he opened the door for her. Daenerys then leaned up to kiss him lightly on the cheek and stepped out into the chilly morning air, though no amount of excitement for seeing him again could push away the niggling feeling of uncertainty lingering in the back of her mind.

BEHIND THE CHAPTER

After posting Chapter 12, I took a brief break and came back to start on the "aftermath" chapter… and ended up rewriting pretty much the entire thing. In the very original version (back before I published Chapter 1 of this story), the smut scene took place in Daenerys's chambers and there would be a whole sequence of events throughout the day, but after changing the location a lot of the chapter had to be tweaked or rewritten entirely. In the end, I'd say it was definitely for the best.

One thing I really liked about writing this chapter is that it gave me the chance to finally address the fact that, for a queen, Daenerys seems to be awfully concerned with the opinions of others and readily follows their orders. It's something that I've thought about for the last several chapters in particular, but I felt like this chapter gave me an excellent chance to start to take care of that since Jacen would undoubtedly have the same sort of question. Again, that's a conversation that will continue across the next couple of chapters.

Addressing that concern was the main reason that I spent so long on this chapter — I added POVs, removed POVs, and switched around POV orders several times. In the end, I removed a lot of what I wrote and used it to form the backbone for the next two chapters, primarily because I just couldn't get the flow between scene changes to make sense. I think it worked out for the best, and it gave me a nice opportunity to make Chapter 14 a bit unique compared to the rest of the story, which I'm looking forward to getting started on.