A/N: Hi everyone! It's been a hot minute. I'm so sorry for the long wait. I really do want to finish this story because I think about it all the time and I hate the fact that this is just sitting there as 'incomplete'. So here we are again. I can't exactly promise a time frame in which I'll update but for now, I'll try to go with biweekly. The next chapter is already finished so of that one you are assured. I also recently had a nice brainstorming session with my beta which got me really excited so I'm fairly confident that I'll get back in the game.

Again, so sorry for the long wait and I hope you'll want to pick this up again. For now, enjoy!

Let no man know is my desire.

Chapter 6

Harry was sitting next to the window in the Slytherin common room, ignoring the murky darkness in favour of his transfiguration textbook. Every now and then, he would peer into the watery depths when he was trying to gather his thoughts but not a single thing made itself known. Really, whose bright idea had it been to install these useless windows, anyway?

"Daydreaming, Potter?" Malfoy bit at him from near the fireplace. "Or just hoping you'll find your future wife in the lake? Though you might be kind of reaching if you're going for the squid."

Crabbe and Goyle howled with laughter as if on cue but Harry decided to just ignore them. He kept reading his book, pretending that he hadn't heard a thing.

But Malfoy wasn't too happy with that. "Hey!" he shouted. "Are you deaf, Potter? I'm talking to you."

Harry took a note on polymorphism and slowly turned the page of his book. It was only because he looked up just in time that he was able to dodge the candelabrum that was thrown at his head. It connected with the window instead but didn't even leave a scratch. The heavy metal of the thing clunked moodily when it hit the ground and Harry felt rage bubble up inside of him. A thing like that could have caused permanent damage. Or worse. What the hell was Malfoy thinking?

"What the hell are you thinking, Malfoy?"

It was someone else who voiced his thoughts, though.

"Stay out of this, Greengrass," Malfoy snapped. "This has nothing to do with you."

"Oh, hasn't it?" Greengrass replied smoothly. "I suppose not, no. But I imagine that Professor Snape would very much like to know when someone is trying to destroy Slytherin property."

"It's just a candelabrum," Malfoy snapped, though the fire had gone from his voice very quickly. "I have hundreds of those at home."

"Oh?" Greengrass said easily. "Then I suppose your father wouldn't mind it if Professor Snape came over to collect one of yours should this one end up being broken." She walked closer to Harry who could only wonder about her intentions. But instead of talking to him or checking if he was alright, she bent over a little to inspect the window.

"Oh my," she said coldly. "It does seem that the glass is scratched a little bit. Whatever will you do about it?"

"Oh, come off it," Malfoy sneered, though Harry couldn't help but notice that he looked even paler than usual. "That glass can't be scratched."

Greengrass shrugged. "Suit yourself," she said. "I doubt that I'll have to tell the Professor about this if you stop throwing things right this minute. If not –" A sudden fire in her eyes was enough to burn the last of Malfoy's confidence to the ground. "- I won't remain as pleasant as I am now."

Malfoy coughed awkwardly and turned back to his goons, not even glancing back to look at Harry.

"Thanks," Harry said but Greengrass simply spun on her heel, flicked her blonde hair over her shoulder and walked back to where she had been sitting, picking up her book as if nothing had even happened. Harry glanced back at the window. There was no scratch on there. Not a single one. He doubted that they would install a normal, fragile window down in the dungeons. Especially when it looked out into the lake. Daphne Greengrass had simply stood up for him albeit in a very roundabout way.

Harry's own fury had quickly subsided and since Malfoy wasn't even turning around to glare at him anymore, he was content to continue revising his essay.

The awkward encounter in the common room hadn't stopped Malfoy, though. If anything, he became more and more aggressive when it came to harassing Harry. He hadn't thrown a punch at him yet – maybe the muggle way was beneath him – but the occasional stinging hex would come his way nearly every day and the way Malfoy liked to impersonate dementors to try and get to Harry wasn't that enjoyable either.

One thing Harry had realised, though, was that ignoring the prat resulted in infuriating him more than any of his actions ever could. And he took simple pleasure in that since it was all he could do to 'fight back'. He wasn't about to go crying to Snape. That would do him no good. And the twins, while they would be there for him if he asked, couldn't go fighting his battles for him every time either, could they?

The truth was that this turned out to be another horrible year at Hogwarts in which he only got some peace of mind when everyone else was gone to Hogsmeade.

It was only too bad that a lot of that time went to Lupin and the learning of the Patronus spell.

"You're not focusing, Harry," Lupin said seemingly out of nowhere.

Harry, thoroughly shaken from his thoughts, looked up apologetically at his scruffy professor.

"I'm sorry, sir," he said. "I was just… trying to think of a happier memory."

Lupin frowned in a way that made Harry swallow thickly. "Harry," he said carefully. "Is it really that difficult for you to find something? Don't you have a happy Christmas you can think back to? A birthday party?"

Harry shook his head. "Not of the top of my head," he said.

"Nothing at all?" Lupin replied softly. He lowered his wand and sat down next to Harry.

Harry sighed. "It's not that I don't have any good memories," he lied. "It's just that I don't have any that are as powerful as the bad one that I keep seeing when the dementors come near."

Lupin's expression turned incredibly sad, instantly making the man appear ten years older. It made Harry regret having said anything at all.

"I'm sorry," Harry said. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"Oh, Harry," Lupin sighed, snaking a warm arm around Harry's shoulders. "You have nothing to be sorry about. None of this is your fault. I just wish that you didn't have to remember… such things."

Oddly, Harry didn't mind the mild comfort Lupin was giving. Maybe it was because the man's awkwardness shone through a little and Harry knew that he was simply doing his best to make him feel better. It made him sort of happy.

"Well, I won't if I get the hang of this spell," Harry said bravely. "I'm sure that I just need a bit more practice."

Lupin reached into his pocket and revealed a long tablet of milk chocolate. "Then more practice is what you shall have," he said. "But not today. It's been a long day already and I have a feeling that your new head of house will flay me if I wear you out too much."

Harry scoffed. "I don't think you need to worry about that, Professor," he said. "Snape isn't exactly the worrying type."

Lupin raised an eyebrow. "Isn't he?" he asked. "Then how would you explain him asking me about every detail of these lessons? Honestly, it was almost as if he was implying that –" he interrupted himself with a sigh.

"That what?" Harry enquired. "What does he care what goes on in here?"

Lupin scratched his scruffy chin and smiled apologetically. "I'm afraid that Severus and I don't have the best of relationships," he said.

"So?" Harry replied quickly. "I don't think he has the best of relationships with any of the other teachers."

"Mind what you say, Harry," Lupin said sternly. "This is still one of my colleagues you're speaking of. And the fact that you have no idea of what I'm talking about makes me think that he – perhaps – is a better man than I am."

"That's ridiculous," Harry protested. "You're –"

"Eat your chocolate, Harry," Lupin interrupted.

Angrily, Harry unwrapped the foil and broke off a large piece of chocolate that he nearly swallowed whole in his haste.

"You're the best teacher I ever had," he said. "And a bloody nice one at that, teaching me how to defend myself against dementors like this."

Lupin smiled kindly. "I'm sorry to say that I don't do this for entirely selfless reasons," he admitted. "I honestly can't be entirely sure that I would have extended the same offer had I not known that you are the son of one of my best friends."

Surprised, Harry looked up at Lupin's grim face. "You knew my dad?" he asked.

"Profoundly so," Lupin admitted. "He's one of the best people I have ever known. Your mother was wonderful as well but I never really hung out with her that much during my years here at Hogwarts." He chuckled. "No, me, your father and –"

Suddenly, Lupin became even paler than he usually was and clicked his mouth shut.

"Professor?" Harry asked gently.

"I know that it's unfair of me to say this to you," Lupin said softly. "But I miss your father wholeheartedly. Seeing him in some of the things you do seems to soothe my mind at times."

Harry didn't know what to say to that and elected to take another bite of chocolate.

"What would he have said about this?" Harry asked softly. "About me being resorted into Slytherin, I mean."

Lupin cleared his throat and leaned back, thinking about that for a few moments. "I believe… that James – when he was your age – would not have liked this outcome very much," he said honestly and Harry could feel his heart sink a bit.

"But back then," Lupin continued, "he still had a lot of growing up to do. I can say for certain, without a doubt in my mind, that the adult James grew up to be – your father – would have supported you every step of the way. Even if you had been sorted into Slytherin in the first place."

"Do you really think so?" Harry asked hopefully.

Lupin laughed. "I'm certain enough that I'd be willing to bet my teaching position on it. Your father was a good man, Harry. It just took him a while to grow into that person."

"Was he that bad in school?" Harry asked. "Then why were you friends with him?"

"He was never bad," Lupin immediately said. "He was a wonderful friend. Better than I ever expected I'd get. I owed a great deal to him. And he was just and fair to everyone for the most part. But people make mistakes. Especially people your age. He was never perfect, that's true. But that doesn't make him a bad person."

"Right," Harry said, not sure what he was supposed to think. "Is that why Snape seems to hate him?"

"It's really not up to me to elaborate," Lupin said. "But I will say this: not everything is as black and white as it always seems."

"More riddles, huh?" Harry chuckled. "Is that a specific requirement to becoming a teacher here?"

Lupin ruffled Harry's hair and laughed. "Secrets of the trade, my boy," he said. "Alright, now run along. I'm sure that you have far better things to do than to spend your day with your Professor."

Harry supposed that he was starting to feel a bit worn out by now and knew that he did still have to do some homework. So, reluctantly, he got up. "Yeah," he said. "I guess. Will we pick this up next week?"

Lupin smiled. "It would be my pleasure entirely," he said. "Just try thinking of some nice memories, alright? Or try to create some if you have to?"

Create some. While he was in Slytherin and possibly being targeted by a mass murderer. Yeah, right.

"I'll try," Harry then said.

"That's all I can ask," Lupin agreed.

A knock on Severus' door disturbed his peaceful afternoon in which he gladly adorned some poorly construed essays with red ink, matching the wine in his glass. Sighing, he set his glass and quill down to open his door.

"Minerva," he greeted evenly when he saw the forlorn-looking transfiguration professor standing there. Her chin was raised high and her lips were pursed strictly but Severus could tell that this was a façade. Surely, the events from these past weeks could not have been easy on her. Cursing his own bleeding heart he stepped aside. "Would you care to come in?" he asked.

"Thank you, Severus," Minerva replied cordially as she crossed his threshold. Her strict demeanour did not falter until Severus closed the door behind her. Then, she unclasped her hands from behind her back and sank into one of the chairs, completely without an invitation to do so. Severus made no comment. He simply waved his wand to summon a second glass of wine for the ageing woman which she accepted without even a moment's thought.

"To what do I owe the pleasure?" Severus prompted, sitting back down, himself. He noticed Minerva glance at the harshly corrected essays and smirked.

"Well, Severus," Minerva said, "I am here to check up on my Gryffindors."

Severus wanted to disabuse her of the notion that there even was such a thing as a Gryffindor at this moment but he wasn't entirely as heartless as most people would like to believe. He could clearly see that Minerva was looking for something to keep her relevant. And – truth be told – he could understand her sentiment. Relevance was something that he – himself – found to be very important, even if he would gladly pretend it wasn't so. So instead, Severus nodded at her.

"Naturally Minerva," he said. "And how might I be of assistance in that matter?"

Minerva sipped her wine elegantly before setting the glass down on his table. "Well," she said. "I'd like to hear from you personally how they are settling into the dungeons. Mr Potter specifically."

Snape growled from between his teeth. Of course. "It shouldn't surprise me that your concern would be centred around the golden boy," he snapped a bit more harshly than he had intended. "Do you expect me to be harvesting his fingernails for potion ingredients or something?"

"Oh, relax, Severus," Minerva scolded, completely undeterred by his attitude. "I'm only concerned about him because he was injured in the fire, not to mention Sirius Black being on the loose." She narrowed her eyes when Severus snorted in dismay. "Need I remind you that Mr Potter hasn't had a normal year yet?" She added. "The poor boy has been assaulted by his own teachers on more than one occasion."

"And you expect me to be next?" Severus asked harshly.

"No," Minerva said. "But I'm not sure if you're giving the problem the necessary attention."

"At the risk of sounding harsh, Minerva," Severus said evenly. "I don't seem to recall your attention being able to keep the boy from any danger."

Minerva sighed. "Point taken," she said as she sank a bit deeper into the couch pillows. She crossed her legs at the ankles and Severus couldn't help but wonder how she still felt comfortable here. Her eyes glanced towards the stack of essays again before smirking when she saw what Severus had written.

"Problem?" Snape asked, not able to keep himself from smiling ever so slightly.

"Just wondering what that poor student has done to be told to –" Minerva picked up the piece of parchment and squinted at the writing on it. "Ah. To join the flock of owls in the owlery and become a messenger boy if this is the best work his brain can manage." Minerva clicked her tongue. "Honestly, Severus. You're going to scare the poor boy away from potions forever."

"If only I could be so hopeful," Severus said. "Why don't you read a bit of what he wrote? If you can decipher his abominable chicken scratch, of course."

Still smiling slightly, Minerva refocused her attention on the essay. As Severus had expected, it didn't take long before she burst into a fit of giggles.

"Indeed," said Severus easily, drinking another sip of his wine.

"Water in a potion is used to keep the cauldron lubricated," Minerva read when she had recovered slightly. "And to keep the ingredients wet. Because if they dry out, they lose their magic? Oh, dear."

"As you say," Severus said. "Perhaps I have been too lenient after all, no?"

Minerva put the essay back on top of the pile, shaking her head slightly. "It's always amusing to come down here," she said.

Severus raised an eyebrow at that. "If it pleases you to read this absolute drivel, I more than welcome you to take some of these essays off my hands," he said.

"As if you'd ever let me," Minerva said, winking slyly. "You just love making up these colourful insults."

"Hmm, as you say, Minerva," Severus replied. It was nice to see his former professor relax a little, letting go of her rather depressed attitude of late. Alas, her troubles didn't lay forgotten.

"So, about Mr Potter," Minerva said again. "Do try to keep him safe. It's not a secret that your Slytherins are not particularly fond of him."

Severus glared at her but it didn't seem to have much effect. "My other Slytherins would think twice before attempting to do anything against their own housemates," he said easily. "In fact, it would seem that it is Mr Potter who has cowed several of my snakes. He has already broken multiple rules and attempted to sneakily avoid my direct orders."

Minerva frowned, clearly not believing that her star Gryffindor could have done anything wrong. "What has he done then?" she asked.

Severus huffed a little. "He has neglected to be at breakfast on time as well as refused to travel alongside one of his housemates when he left his dorm."

Minerva raised an eyebrow. "Really?" she asked. "And that earned him a detention, I wager?"

Severus ignored the disapproving tone of her voice. "It did," he said easily. "In time he'll learn that he will not get away with his rule-breaking attitude any longer. Not while he's in my house. And the same can be said for those blasted Weasley twins."

Minerva sighed. "What did they do now?"

"That is yet to be determined," Severus grumbled. "But I will find out. And when I do –"

"Are you sure that you're not just letting your bias influence you?" Minerva interrupted him rudely. "Would you have punished any other new Slytherin the first time they broke a rule, for example?"

"This is Potter's third year," Severus replied. "He should know by now that I do not suffer fools, nor rule-breakers." Severus rolled his eyes. "And yet –"

"And yet, what?" Minerva asked.

"And yet, he seemed to think I would break a rule for him, as asinine as that hope was." Severus saw that Minerva's glass was now empty. With a swish of his wand, he refilled it.

"What did he ask for?" Minerva asked, her cat-like curiosity suiting her.

"He wanted me to give him permission to visit Hogsmeade," Severus said, as if that question had been entirely ridiculous. "Wanted me to circumvent the rules for him."

"Poor boy," Minerva said, shaking her head. "He must have been really desperate to even try to go to you."

"Maybe he should have just asked his relatives when he still had the chance," Severus said without any compassion. "That's what happens when you leave things until the last minute, if his summer homework is any indication."

"It's for the better, anyways," Minerva said. "With Black on the loose, he will be safer here."

Snape chuckled darkly. "Gryffindor tower burned down, Minerva," he said. "Either Black's already in the castle, or some other danger was set loose here. Who knows. Either way, I don't know if keeping him inside will really help him all that much."

"That's why I'm asking you to try and keep him safe!" Minerva exclaimed. "By Merlin, Severus, why are you being so difficult about this?" She sighed and downed the rest of her wine in one big swallow. "I know what your problem is," she said softly. "Especially this year. But you have to stop taking it out on Mr Potter." Her fierce gaze locked with Severus' and for one small moment, it was as if he was a student again, about to get assigned detention by the feline professor. "If he gets hurt and I find out that you could have prevented it by simply removing that broomstick from your arse, there will be consequences."

"How crude," Severus replied a bit annoyed. "Let me state it plain and simple, Minerva. I will always do my best to protect my Slytherins. Even if I do not particularly like them. And, right now, Mr Potter is a Slytherin."

Minerva sighed.

"Besides," Severus felt the need to add. "In case you have forgotten, I was the one who saved the blasted boy from the fire while you were still soundly asleep."

This time, Minerva actually had the decency to blush. Severus caught her looking at the arm that had been burnt in the tower and was pleased when her expression became quite contrite, indeed.

"Point taken, Severus," she said, something akin to gratitude in her voice. "I should not doubt your sense of morality."

"Indeed you should not," Severus agreed. "I may not be a part of the boy's fan club, but you have my word that I will venture to keep him safe. That is precisely why I have these rules in place, you understand."

Minerva frowned. "Don't you think they're a bit much, though?" She tried. "He is already thirteen, after all."

Severus raised his eyes skyward for a moment. "Were you or were you not just asking me to keep the boy safe, Minerva?" he growled. "This is how I do it."

"Very well, Severus," Minerva said, shrugging a bit. Then she had the audacity to hold out her glass, shaking it a bit as if to ask for more. But Severus smirked and acquiesced with another flick of his wand.

"Now," Minerva said, taking a couple of the essays that still littered the table, completely devoid of any red marks. "Let's see what Mr Davies has to say on the subject of nightshade, shall we?"

Severus snorted as he took another essay for himself. His red quill already in his hand. "Well, if we're to believe Ms Taylor, humans are immune to the poison of nightshade plants because we eat potatoes and potatoes are… part of the nightshade family." He smirked as he thought of what to write. "Maybe I should advise her to try eating Atropa Belladonna," he said innocently. "Tell her it will taste sublime."

"As long as you write something underneath it along the lines of 'In case you didn't notice, Ms Taylor, that was sarcasm.'" Minerva said.

Severus laughed. "As always, you're far too kind."

"Lucky for you," Minerva said with a wink. "Or you might not have gotten off so easily with some of the drivel you used to write."

Severus all but choked in his wine.

A/N: Thanks for reading! Please review.

Last revised on 03/12/2024