Chapter 12
A couple of weeks passed and today Gaby was due to come home from hospital. Rachel felt a bit nervous, Gaby had recovered so well and seemed to be back to her normal self, she just didn't want anything to unsettle her when she came home. She didn't know how to handle meal times, at the hospital they'd said to act as normal as possible and not draw any attention to her eating, but Rachel knew that this would be difficult.
Although Rachel had visited Gaby every day in hospital, she couldn't help but feel a bit apprehensive about her coming home, she just hoped she'd keep up with the progress she was making, she couldn't bare it if things were to go back to the way they were.
She woke Hannah, Ivy and Amy up as it was time to drop them off at school. Hannah had been meant to be going back a week ago, but Mel had decided to stop another week, much to Rachel's annoyance. Hannah had really started to settle in now and although she felt awful for thinking it, she was starting to wish her Mum wouldn't come back so she could stay here forever.
Hannah seemed a bit reluctant to go to school today, however.
"Auntie Rachel I don't feel that well"
"How don't you feel well?" Rachel asked, not buying this as Hannah had seemed fine all night and she didn't look unwell
"My head hurts"
"Right" Rachel said
"So can I stay off?"
"Nope, you're going to school, come on up"
Hannah could tell there was no point trying to argue, so got out of bed and started getting ready
"You normally love going to school" Rachel said
"I just don't feel that well today"
Rachel rolled her eyes, she knew from experience when a kid was lying about being ill.
"10 minutes to get dressed then breakfast"
Hannah was really nervous about going to school today, she'd been really struggling at school recently and didn't want anyone to find out about it. She had a really nasty supply teacher at the moment who wasn't that supportive, she'd threatened to tell her auntie if she did poorly again on another test. One of the girls in her class had agreed to let her copy out her answers in a test yesterday, but afterwards had said that unless Hannah gave her £10 she'd tell her teacher about it
Hannah had been panicking all night about it, she didn't have any of her own money, but she couldn't stand the thought of anyone finding out she'd cheated. She'd ended up creeping downstairs last night and stealing some money out of her aunties bag. Now she felt really guilty and she was terrified that Rachel wouldn't want her to live here anymore if she knew about it, but she was also scared of what she'd do if she found out about the cheating.
About 10 minutes later Rachel came in again, she found Hannah sat on her bed
"Hannah, breakfasts ready, come down"
Hannah got up and followed Rachel down.
As soon as they'd finished having breakfast, Rachel got them all in the car and they set off for school
"Will Gaby be back when we get home?" Ivy asked
"Yes, I'm leaving school at about lunch time to get her" Rachel said "She might act a bit strange at first, she hasn't been home in a while, so just all do your best to help her settle"
"Is she still really skinny?" Ivy said
"Not anywhere near as skinny as she was, but don't any of you mention that she's put on weight, or that she looks different"
Rachel knew Ivy wouldn't say anything on purpose, but she just didn't want anything being said that might upset Gaby
When they got to the primary school Ivy got out but Hannah stayed in the back
"Hannah come on out" Rachel said
"I don't feel well"
Rachel sighed heavily
"I haven't got the time for this, get out" She said, a little more firmly
It took quite a bit of arguing to get Hannah to go to school but eventually she did.
When she got to work, Rachel started to get on with some paperwork.
Suddenly there was a knock on the door and Kim entered
"Rach sorry to bother you, we're collecting money for Jasmine's wedding"
"Oh yeah I'd forgotten all about it, god it's this weekend isn't it?"
"Yeah are you coming?"
"I can't, I wish I could, I just feel I need to be at home at the moment, especially with Gaby coming home"
Gaby's teacher had been told about her situation, so they could support her when she came back
"How's she doing?"
"She's okay, she's put a good amount of weight back on, I'm just worried about her coming home"
"I'm sure she'll be desperate to get back, all her friends are missing her"
Rachel smiled, it was true, she'd had lots of girls come and ask her how Gaby was getting on
"You know I'm here for you, and Gaby, if ever you think she could do with someone outside the family to talk to, then my office door is always open"
"Thanks Kim" Rachel said "Oh I'll get the money now"
Rachel opened her purse up, she was shocked when she looked inside, she knew she'd had exactly £20 in there last night
She tried to hide her surprise and handed Kim the other tenner
"Thanks Rachel, see you later"
As soon as Kim left Rachel checked through her bag again, it wasn't anywhere to be found.
Of course, Rachel had lost money before, but she was so certain that it had been in there and there was no way it could have fallen out, she knew someone must have taken it.
Obviously, it couldn't have been Gaby, and she doubted Ivy or Hannah would have taken it, so she couldn't help but suspect Amy.
She decided to confront Amy about it straight away
"Bridget what class is my niece Amy in please?"
"She's in English, room 201, they've got a supply teacher in"
"Ah thankyou"
Rachel walked across and knocked on the door
"Sorry to interrupt, can I have a little word with Amy please?"
"Sure, Amy out you go"
Amy was a bit confused as to why Rachel wanted to speak to her but followed her out anyway
"What's this about Rach?" Amy asked
"Amy, I'm going to ask you something and I need you to be honest with me"
"okay"
Rachel paused for a moment before saying "I'm missing £10 from my purse; did you take it?"
"What? No of course not, I would never steal from your purse"
"Well I really hope not young lady"
"Rachel, I haven't touched your bloody money" Amy said, getting quite angry that she was being accused of something she hadn't done.
"Well who has then?"
"How the hell should I know"
"Watch your tone"
"No because you're accusing me of taking it when I haven't touched it"
"All I'm saying is that it was there last night and now it's not and I know someone's taken it"
"Well it wasn't me"
"Right, if you say so"
"So you think I did it? Why would I need to steal it" Amy said, almost shouting now
"Calm down" Rachel sighed
"No I won't calm down when you're saying I've done something I haven't"
"Okay, I believe you" Rachel said, although she didn't entirely
"I can't believe you think I'd steal from your purse"
Rachel was about to reply when Amy stormed back inside
Rachel rolled her eyes before going back to her office
The morning seemed to drag, but eventually it was time to go and get Gaby
She drove over to the hospital and went up to the ward.
A smile spread across Gaby's face when she saw her Mum. She immediately got up and raced over to her.
"Hello darling" Rachel said wrapping her arms around her daughter
"Mum I can't believe I'm going home, I'm so excited"
"I'm so glad you're coming back, you look fantastic"
It was true, Gaby was looking healthier than she had in ages
Rachel had to go to a meeting with some of the staff to help arrange Gaby's outpatient care, and her transition back home
Finally, it was time to go back home
"Are you going back to work Mum?" Gaby asked
"No, I've told them I'm taking the afternoon off, I was thinking we get you unpacked and then maybe we could go into town, get some lunch, maybe do a bit of shopping"
"Yeah that sounds good"
"Just hope no one from school sees me"
Gaby smiled and then got in the car
"Mum I'm a bit nervous about going back to school on Monday" Gaby admitted
"Well you've got the weekend to get used to being home, I'm sure you'll be completely fine once you're back, it will seem a bit strange at first"
"Do all my teachers know why I'm off?"
"Nope, just me and miss Campbell, and you know that you've got to eat lunch with one of us for the next couple of weeks, don't you? The hospital was really strict about that"
"Yeah I know, but I promise I am eating normally again"
"I know you are, but it might just be easy to slip back into old habits when you're home and we need to make sure that doesn't happen" Rachel said "They've given me a calorie book to fill out, and I've got to record your weight every day, they said they'll ask for it when we go to your first outpatient appointment"
"Yeah they said" Gaby sighed
"hey, I know it seems like you're going to be followed around all the time, but it really is just to protect you"
"I know" Gaby said smiling slightly
They chatted some more on the way home
It felt a bit strange when Gaby walked back into the house, but she was glad to be away from the hospital
Rachel decided to give her a bit of space while she unpacked her things, as she didn't want to overwhelm her.
After about half an hour, she decided to bring her a coffee up
"Gab can I come in?"
"Yeah"
When Rachel came in she found Gaby on her bed, she noticed she looked a bit upset
She sat down next to her and handed her a coffee
"Is everything alright love?"
"Yeah" Gaby said but then started to cry
"Hey, I know it must seem weird coming back, you just need to take things slowly"
"It's not that, I just feel so bad for everything" Gaby said
"What do you mean love?"
"I just put you through so much, I can't believe what I must have been like. I didn't want it to get so serious, but I couldn't stop myself. I can't believe I almost threw everything away just to be skinny"
"Gaby, you must never feel bad for any of this, you had a mental illness and you've worked so hard to overcome it, I'm so proud of you" Rachel said "and you mustn't be so hard on yourself, even if you do go back to feeling how you were, it's bound to happen sometimes, but promise me you'll talk to me won't you"
"Yeah I promise" Gaby said, and she meant it
"How about we finish this coffee then drive into town?"
"Yeah that sounds good"
After they'd finished their coffees Rachel grabbed her bag and they got in the car.
It was a really sunny day, so Rachel had changed into her white summer trousers and floral top and Gaby was wearing her shorts and t-shirt
"Mum are we going on holiday this year"
"Well I was actually going to ask for your help with that, I really want to go away, maybe with grandma and Grandad, so I was thinking of having a look later, see if we can spot a nice villa somewhere"
"Yeah that'll be so good, I'd love to go to Cypress"
"That might be a good choice, we've never been before and the weather will be amazing, although it's felt like being abroad anyway these last couple of weeks"
When they got to town, Rachel parked up
"Can we go to the toilets first" Gaby asked
"Yeah I could do with going too"
They quickly found some toilets and went in
When Gaby went, she noticed she'd come on her period, she was shocked as she hadn't had one for a couple of months so thought they might have stopped.
Rachel had washed her hands so waited for Gaby
"Gaby is everything okay?" she asked, as she'd been quite a while
"Erm yeah"
"Are you sure?" Rachel called, as Gaby didn't sound too convinced
"Is it just you in here?"
"Yeah what's up?"
Gaby unlocked the door and stepped out
"I've come on my period"
"Oh Gab, that's fantastic, that was one of the things they talked about in that meeting, I've got to tick it off in the book they've given me because it's one of the signs your bodies getting back to normal"
"I haven't had one for ages"
"That's because your body hasn't been working properly. Love that's really good news" Rachel said
Gaby's cheeks were burning red, Rachel noticed this.
"Sorry, I don't mean to embarrass you, I'm just pleased that's all"
"Do you have any pads? I haven't got any with me"
"Yeah, in my bag" Rachel said reaching inside
"Here you go"
"Thanks"
"I'll wait outside for you"
A couple of minutes later Gaby came out
"Right lunch first then shop, or shop then lunch?" Rachel asked
"Shop first then lunch"
They went to new look first and Gaby saw a dress she really liked
"Mum can I try this on?" Gaby asked
"No, you cannot" Rachel said
"Why what's wrong with it?"
"Well it's so short it would barely cover your knickers, it wouldn't exactly leave much to the imagination"
"Amy wears dresses this short"
"Yes much to my annoyance and she's 2 years older!"
Gaby sighed heavily and put it back
Rachel shook her head but smiled, it felt good to be back with Gaby, arguing over daft stuff. Things were finally starting to feel normal again.
After quite a bit of shopping they decided to go to bella italia for lunch
It was so good to see Gaby tucking into her food again
"Mum could I maybe go to a party next weekend?" Gaby asked
"Who's party?"
"Just Josh's he's invited about 30 of us, he texted me while I was in hospital"
"I don't know Gab, you're only 12" Rachel said doubtfully
"Please, all my friends are going"
"Will there be alcohol?" Rachel asked, if there was there was no way she was going to let Gaby go, irrespective of whether her friends were going or not
"No of course not"
"Will his parents be there?" was Rachel's next question
"Yeah, it's not like a proper party"
"Well, maybe then" Rachel sighed, still not sure about this "Let's see how this week goes first"
"Do you like Josh?" Gaby asked
Rachel laughed "I'm not sure Gaby, he's just a bit young for me" she said sarcastically
"Obviously not like that, but do you think he's nice"
"Yeah he seems fine, can't say I've had that many dealings with him, which is normally a good thing"
"Oh"
"Why do you ask?" Rachel asked suspiciously
"No reason" Gaby said but she was smiling slightly
Rachel smiled to herself, guessing maybe Gaby had a bit of a crush on him
They'd been in the restaurant for quite a while before deciding to head out
They were heading back to the car when suddenly Rachel's phone rang
It was Hannah's school, they wanted her to come and collect her because apparently, she'd been sick
The truth was, Hannah wasn't really ill, she'd given her the money, but the teacher had seen it and then she'd had to explain everything to her. Her teacher was absolutely furious when she found out and said she was going to speak to her auntie about it at the end of the day. The thought of this had terrified Hannah, so she'd pretended to be sick at lunch time, so she'd get sent home before she had a chance to speak to Rachel.
Hannah was sat in her head teacher's office waiting for Rachel
"Don't think I don't know what this is about young lady" Mrs Hughes said
"What do you mean?"
Mrs Hughes sighed "Me and the other teachers do talk you know, Mrs Robinson told me all about what's been going on and I'll be speaking to your auntie myself when she gets here"
Hannah suddenly started crying, Mrs Hughes couldn't help but feel sorry for her, Hannah was such a nice girl and she knew she'd never do anything deliberately wrong
"Please don't tell Rachel" Hannah said sounding small "Mum's away and I don't want her to kick me out"
"Oh Hannah" she sighed, grabbing some tissues "Your auntie isn't going to kick you out, I'm sure she loves you very much"
"But I stole money from her"
"Yes and I'm sure she'll be very angry and upset over that, and she has every right to be, but once you explain what happened I'm sure she'll calm down"
"Please don't tell her"
"I'll tell you what, I won't tell her, but I need you to and I'm going to be checking tomorrow that you have"
Hannah was already dreading this conversation but at least she had a couple of hours till she had to think about it
"What I really don't get though Hannah is why you would feel the need to do it in the first place"
"Mrs Robinson keeps getting really angry at me because of my test scores" Hannah cried
"Oh right" Mrs hughes said, in all honesty she wasn't too keen on the supply teacher anyway, she'd never want any of the kids to feel bullied because they weren't doing very well.
About 5 minutes later, Hannah could see her auntie coming up the playground, she immediately began to feel worried and ran to the toilets to hide.
Rachel signed into reception and went through
"Miss Mason, Hannah's just nipped to the toilet, but would I be able to have a little word?" Mrs Hughes asked
"Of course, what is it?"
"Hannah's been a bit upset this afternoon, and I just wanted to warn you I don't think this illness is entirely genuine" She explained, she kept her promise to Hannah and didn't mention anything else that had happened
"Oh right, she was trying to get out of school this morning. Has something happened?"
Mrs Hughes sighed, she didn't want to lie but she had made Hannah a promise, and she did want to give Hannah the chance to explain herself.
"I'd ask Hannah about it"
Rachel was a bit confused by this, but before she had the chance to say anything else Hannah came out of the toilets
"Have you got your bags and stuff? Rachel asked
Hannah nodded
"Right, come on then you"
Hannah could tell Rachel was annoyed at her already, she hoped Mrs Hughes hadn't said anything while she'd been in the toilet
They started walking to the car and Rachel wasn't speaking
"Rachel, I feel sick still"
"Well you better go and have a lie down when you get in"
"Do you not believe me"
"No, you know what I don't believe you Hannah, you were trying to get out of school this morning"
Hannah didn't say anything to this
"Well you needn't think you're going to have an easy time of it at home, you can spend the afternoon doing your homework, and if you finish I'll find more for you to do"
"Okay" Hannah said sounding small
Hannah had forgotten Gaby was coming home today so got a shock when she saw her in the car
She went over to her and gave her a massive cuddle
"Hey Hannah, I've missed you" Gaby said smiling
"I can't believe you're home again"
"I hear you've been so desperate to see me you've skived off" Gaby said laughing
"Oi it's not a laughing matter" Rachel said "She's in real trouble"
Gaby nudged Hannah and rolled her eyes
Hannah felt a bit more relaxed with Gaby in the car as well
When they got home, Gaby headed straight for the back garden, she wanted to get a bit of a tan
Hannah tried to follow but Rachel stopped her
"Not so fast, go up and get changed, then you can get on with your work" Rachel said
Hannah went up and changed into some shorts and a top on, she began to feel really nervous about telling Rachel, but she knew she had to at some point soon, so maybe it was better to just get it over with.
She took a deep breathe and then walked downstairs and into the garden, where Rachel and Gaby were both laid
"Hannah I think I remember saying get changed and get on with some work" Rachel said
"I need to talk to you" Hannah said sounding scared
"What about?"
Hannah didn't really want to say in front of Gaby, she didn't want her to hate her too
Rachel could tell Hannah felt uncomfortable. She sighed, but got up and followed Hannah in, shutting the door behind her so they could talk in private.
"What is it you want to talk to me about?"
"I've done something really bad" Hannah whispered tears forming in her eyes
"What have you done?"
"I took £10 out of your purse last night"
"You took that money" Rachel said shocked "You stole money from my purse?"
Hannah just nodded
"Why on earth would you do something like that?"
"I cheated on a test because I knew I'd do badly If I didn't and a girl caught me and said she'd tell on me if I didn't pay her the money"
"So not only did you steal money from me, you cheated as well" Rachel said, her voice getting louder and sounding more and more angry
"I'm sorry"
"Do you have any idea how serious this is young lady?" Rachel said "Do you realise the sort of trouble you're in?"
"I know I shouldn't have done it" Hannah cried, she'd never really been in proper trouble with her auntie before and it wasn't very nice
"Too right you shouldn't have done it! I'm so disappointed in you Hannah, how the hell am I meant to trust you when you do things like this"
Hannah didn't respond, just stood there crying, wishing the ground would swallow her up
"Just you wait till your Mum hears about this"
"Don't tell her" Hannah begged, knowing her Mum would be 5 times scarier than Rachel when she got angry
"You really think it's up for discussion, just go and wait in your room, I don't even want to look at you right now"
"Am I still allowed to stay here"
Rachel didn't answer but then eventually said "I need to be able to trust you if you're going to stay here while your Mum's away and I clearly can't"
Hannah ran upstairs into her bedroom
Instantly Rachel regretted saying that, she wouldn't dream of really making Hannah leave, she just wanted to make sure she knew how serious it was
About half an hour passed and Rachel had started to calm down a little bit, she felt quite bad for making Hannah cry.
She waited a few more minutes before deciding to go up and see her.
However, there was a knock on the door causing her to turn around
Rachel was shocked when a policeman was at the door
"Hello, can I help you?" Rachel asked confused
"Are you Rachel Mason"
"I am"
"I'm police constable Morris" the man said showing her his ID "I'm afraid we have some bad news about your sister"
"What?" Rachel said panic starting to etch through her body
"She had an accident abroad and fell off a cliff while drunk, I'm afraid she passed away"
"She's dead" Rachel whispered, feeling as if she was going to be sick
"I'm afraid so, her bodies been formally identified"
Rachel just stood in shock, she could barely speak
The police officer stayed a little longer but then left Rachel in peace.
Rachel had to rush to the toilet to be sick, tears mixed with mascara were streaming down her face
Gaby had seen her Mum rushing to the loo, so went inside to check she was okay
Rachel hadn't had time to close the door
"Mum what's happened are you ill?" Gaby asked, shocked when she saw her Mum
Rachel flushed the chain and turned to face Gaby
"Your auntie Mel has died" Rachel said "She had an accident"
Gaby couldn't believe it, she too burst into tears
It was about half an hour since Rachel had received the news, she knew she had to go and tell Hannah. She'd wanted to wait until she'd calmed down as she didn't think it would do Hannah any good seeing her as upset as she'd been when she'd found out.
Rachel was absolutely dreading this conversation. Hannah and Mel had always had a few problems, but she knew how much Hannah loved her Mum really.
She took a deep breathe before going upstairs.
She knocked on Hannah's room before going in, she found Hannah upset sat at her desk trying to work
"Auntie Rachel, I have tried to do work, it's just really had" Hannah said "I'm so sorry about taking the money, please don't tell Mum"
Hearing Hannah say this nearly made Rachel cry all over again
"Hannah, I need to talk to you sweetie" Rachel said
Hannah was confused, her auntie seemed so different to how she'd been earlier, she didn't think she'd forgive her that quickly, unless maybe she was going to tell her she had to move out
"Please don't make me leave" Hannah said "I'll never steal anything from you again"
"What?" Rachel said, in the midst of everything she'd totally forgotten about earlier "No love, no ones going to make you leave"
"Am I still in trouble?"
Rachel just shook her head
"Will you come and sit on the bed with me?"
Confused Hannah went and sat with Rachel
Rachel put her arm around her
"Love, I've got some terrible news" Rachel said "Your Mum died earlier"
Hannah froze, she couldn't believe what she was hearing
"What?"
"Oh Hannah I'm so sorry" Rachel said starting to cry
"No, you're lying" Hannah screamed "Mum isn't dead you're a liar"
"Hannah I …" Rachel began
"Shut up, shut up, it's not true" She cried
Rachel tried to put her arm around her but she pushed her away
"Go away" Hannah shouted
Rachel stepped closer and Hannah started to cry and punch her. Rachel grabbed her arms, for a couple of moments Hannah tried to fight but then collapsed against Rachel and started to sob
"Hey, it's alright, it's alright" Rachel soothed, wrapping her arms tightly around Hannah
She brought her over to the bed and sat down with her
Hannah clung onto her as if she was a baby and sobbed violently into her chest
Rachel tried to soothe her, stroking her face gently
"Shh, it's okay, it's going to be okay" She whispered, but Hannah wasn't listening
They stayed like that for a good 10 minutes and then Hannah sat up
"What's going to happen to me?" she cried
"You know you can stay here"
"No I can't"
"What do you mean?"
"You said I had to leave because I stole money, I've got no where to go" Hannah cried
Rachel instantly felt awful "oh love, I didn't mean that, you're staying right here"
"I want my Mum" Hannah sobbed
Rachel felt a lump form in her throat, this reminded her of how Gaby was when her Dad died
"I know" Rachel said gently "I know you want your Mum"
The rest of the day was a bit of a blur. Rachel had stayed with Hannah for ages but decided to give her some space.
She'd told the other girls what had happened and of course they'd been devastated.
Rachel had cooked tea, no one was really eating it though.
At about 8.30 Rachel took Hannah up to bed, she'd stayed with her as she'd fallen asleep, which to her surprise hadn't taken too long, but Rachel had a feeling she wouldn't stay like that for too long.
Sure enough, at about 11 when Rachel had just dropped off to sleep, she was woken up by Hannah crying out
She instantly ran into her room and flicked the light on
Hannah was sat up in bed, all tearful and sweaty
She wrapped her arms around Rachel and began to shake
"Rachel, where's Mum? I need Mum"
"It's okay, I'm here look you're just in your bedroom at my house"
"I want to be at my bedroom in Mum's house, I need Mum" Hannah cried
"I know you need your Mum, but I'm here" Rachel said, not knowing what else to say
"I feel sick" Hannah mumbled
Rachel was about to help her to the toilet, but it was too late, she was sick all over the bed
Rachel held her hair back for her
"Sorry" Hannah said "Can I have a new sheet to put on, I'll sort it out"
"It's alright love, l can sort it" Rachel said gently "can you stand up?"
Slowly Hannah got out of bed.
She stood shivering in her pyjamas
"You get a fresh pyjama top on, have a wash and then get into my bed, I'll sort this one out" Rachel said
She stripped the bed and bundled up the sheets
Hannah still hadn't moved, so Rachel helped her into a new top and then led her to the bathroom to get washed up
"Sorry" Hannah said again, shaking
"It's okay" She said "You go and get into my bed, I won't be long"
Hannah got into Rachel's bed, Rachel came up a couple of minutes later and got in next to her
"I stole from you earlier" Hannah said
Rachel was confused about why she was bringing this up, after all it was the least of her worried now, but she guessed Hannah was a bit confused
"It's alright love" Rachel said calmly
"Do you hate me?"
"No Hannah" she said "You know I love you so much"
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