A/N: Sorry. Exhausted. Not much to say here. Next story in the series is way better, I promise. This one might get cleaned more at a point in my life when I have more fortitude to dedicate to that. Thanks for bearing with me.
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Sesshoumaru felt strange. It was nothing he'd ever felt before; it was like Nothing itself had become Something, a Something that he was not yet part of, but suspended within, still, quiet...he couldn't feel his body, but he could feel what he thought it should feel like. It was hard to describe, but slowly it dawned on him...
"Hah, I'm dead. Of course," he heard himself say in a strange way where he heard without ears, and then he felt himself form without a form and understood that this was his ethereal self, his spirit, his soul, his ghost.
He looked at his own materialization and saw that he was dressed just as he had been when he died, and felt odd without a Mokomoko-sama to comfort him-but of course it hadn't died, for which he was thankful. He looked down at what felt like hands, and there they were, stripes and claws and all...but of course, he chuckled, this was now all but an illusion, wasn't it?
"I wonder," he asked himself out loud, "where exactly I am right now."
Looking about, he saw little else but thick black fog; but then, he frowned, this too must also be illusion, and he focused and shut his eyes and beheld, through a place above both eyes, through a Third Eye unseen, that the fog parted and he was near a Veil, and beyond that Veil was the land of the living. And it moved when he moved and shifted when he shifted, so that it was always next to him; the Veil between those who were living and those who were dead. And he could walk about or levitate into the air like he had been able to before with his powers, but he felt no substance when he went to touch a tree, and scoffed at himself as if he should have not bothered trying.
Then, he recognized where he was. At first it hadn't hit him, because everyone had already left by this time...
"The place I died," he realized, and looking about at the tracks in the ground, the blood spatters...
He stood there for a long time, but then, with a huff and shaking his head at himself, he started to follow the tracks down the hill, sure that they led to where his family and friends had come from to see him off...
He could have gone very fast, he realized-probably much faster than he'd ever been as a mortal. But somehow, right now, he felt like what he really wanted to do was Walk, just Walk, not even briskly, just slowly strolling along the hill, as if haunting-
"Haunting!" he chuckled softly at his own thought, "I am, I really am. How poetic. I'm a haunting spirit. Spooooky," he giggled.
It took him a long time to walk down to the camp, marvelling all the way as he slowly came upon it from a distance, then walked around it, and among the other youkai, and near the wolves, some of whom stirred to blink at him, and the panthers, and the foxes, and the hanyou, and the humans, and...
"Oh, Mother," he sighed, seeing her and a large handful of others gathered near her, watching Moumou's projections, "I hope you're not going to try looking for me in the Nether when I'm right..."
But then he stopped himself from talking to himself and peered more closely at Moumou's projections.
"So, little brother, you really did intend to look for me," he whispered, and then, sadly, "but I'm not...wait. That's not the look on your face. You're going...to stop Zusaku. And I..."
Something flickered in his chest, and he looked down at himself, surprised to see a tiny fizzle of green light near his chest.
"What...ah, I see. Shippou's houshi-no-tama must have to return to his soul now that I'm dead, and he's..."
And his whole spirit-form convulsed, and he found himself reeling, gasping for air he didn't breathe with a voice that had no throat, and a thought struck him, and not knowing what it was like to be an unintended ghost, he spun around, and found himself teleported, facing his own body laying before him in a quiet room, both his body...and Shippou's.
Tenseiga and Bakusaiga were laying nearby, but Sou'unga was nowhere in sight. For a moment, Sesshoumaru wondered if perhaps...
"Unfortunately," Thanh Long materialized beside him in a familiar dragon form about twelve feet long from nose to tip of the tail, "that's not how this works. I don't know exactly how...to explain, but I'll try. Your power to resurrect, My power to resurrect, relies on your physical form tying you to the Mortal Realm, bridging the gap between my Heavenly Powers and the Earthly Domain. Sou'unga brings back the Undead through the Nether, which is why it's not the same as true resurrection, and also why I cannot cross into the Nether without some kind of help ever since I was bound to this blade. Where we are now, is neither Nether nor Heaven, but the Very Middle of the Very Top, the place at which Death meets Life, the Veil. This is where the imps reside, the ones you've often seen and slain to restore souls. Oh, don't cringe, they're really not worth fretting about, their souls reform elsewhere swiftly. They are lesser souls punished for lesser sins, have no pity for the ones you've felled."
"So," Sesshoumaru asked slowly, "where do I go from here? What do I do now?"
"That is up to you," Thanh Long said softly.
Sesshoumaru looked down at his own body, but then after a long minute, he turned to look at Shippou's body, and moved to be near the fox, and sat next to him for a very long time, for over an hour, just sitting there...
"Thanh Long, if he...if he is in Heaven, then I should not deprive him of peace. You would not recall him from being at peace with his own Father, would you?" he finally asked.
"He was at peace with his own Father a long time ago, Sesshoumaru, if that's what you're asking."
"You read my heart and yet you pretend you don't know what I'm asking? No, that's not what I'm asking, and you know it."
"Then ask what you are really asking."
"Would you recall Shippou from being at peace if he were in Heaven?"
"Would you?"
Sesshoumaru paused and looked at the kitsune for a long time, maybe ten minutes before he answered.
"I probably would. I am selfish."
"It is good that you admit it."
"Would you, Thanh Long? Would you allow me to recall him if he were at peace?"
"Is that the question you really want to ask me?"
"Are you telling me I don't want to know the answer?"
"No, I'm asking, is that the question you really want to ask me?"
"Yes."
"No."
"No?"
"Yes."
"Ah."
"Ah is not here, nor is Un. They are in the Nether with your brother."
But Sesshoumaru could not even indulge that humor, for now he stood by the kitsune's side, and he felt odd, as if he would have liked to have trembled perhaps, but without a body, those reactions weren't the same, and he merely stood, feeling his spirit tremble instead of his body.
"Could I have...could I have found a way, to spare his life? Did I underestimate-"
"Irrelevant speculations will never give you the answer you seek."
"If he is at peace," Sesshoumaru heard without ears that voice he spoke in without vocal cords, and it felt like he was whispering now, and so his voice sounded quieter to him, "then I should not truly wish to disturb him from that peace. My brother seeks Zusaku in the Nether, and maybe I should, perhaps if I seek him out and find a way to return through the Meidou, in another vessel perhaps, like with the Crystal..."
"You still don't ask the question?"
"What is left to ask?" Sesshoumaru huffed.
"The question you haven't asked yet, the one that's Really on your mind."
"I..."
"Why don't you want to ask me, Sesshoumaru?"
"Because...I..."
"Say it."
"Because I...don't want...to know the answer."
"Not exactly."
"Thanh Long, why are you prodding me so?" Sesshoumaru protested, growing more uncomfortable.
"You seek an answer from me that none others can give you, but you will not ask the question that will give you this answer. Why? Do you not know that I can read your heart, Sesshoumaru? What makes you hesitate to form the question in words?"
"I...well what makes You hesitate to answer it, if you already know?" Sesshoumaru huffed, slightly indignant, and crossed his arms.
"I am not the one who must ask the right question. I can only answer it for you when you realize what it is."
"This is one of those stupid-"
"Yes, indeed it is. You know you can't lie to me. You love this kind of thing. It challenges you."
"You irk me."
"You are welcome."
"I don't want to ask," Sesshoumaru finally sighed, "because I don't want to react to the answer."
"Why is that?"
"Because if he is in Heaven, I will never see him again, and I will be sad. And if he is in Hell, I will see him again, and I will be happy."
"So you wish to know, but you wish to feel differently."
"Yes."
"Well, tough. Get over it."
"Wh-what?"
"I said, Get over it. You'll never get used to losing people. That's why your heart and mine resonate," Thanh Long smiled softly, and then, he said in a quieter voice, "now Ask, Sesshoumaru."
"Is Shippou in Heaven?"
"No."
Sesshoumaru couldn't help but smile, and then felt guilty, and elated, at the same time...
"I really shouldn't-"
"Get over it."
"Well, okay. But now what? How do I find him?"
"Sink, Sesshoumaru. You will fall down through the Veil and away from where I can reach at the moment, but Shippou's soul is with Sou'unga, and they will find you swiftly. Close your eyes and let slip all your substance, just fall softly down into the void..."
So Sesshoumaru sank, feeling himself falling, but with the soft voice of Thanh Long echoing in his ears, he felt no fear as he sank...
.
"I feel him," Sou'unga whispered, and Shippou felt him too, and they went, this way and that, and that way and this, and Sou'unga took the form of his spirit, and Shippou latched onto his form, and they went hither and thither too swiftly to mark the time as time. And Sou'unga felt the pressure of the Veil near his being, and flicked his tail, and caught the soul of the dog, and the soul took form, and Sesshoumaru materialized, and found himself clutched in two large claws, and looked up in surprise.
"Sou'unga," he blinked, and for a moment, Sou'unga thought he might still be afraid, to see him in the Nether at his death-
But then, instead of a gasp of fear or a moment of panic, Sesshoumaru did the unexpected.
He Smiled.
"Shippou is with you," he peered past the dragon's form at the kitsune on his back, grinning.
"I couldn't have left you to drift around aimlessly, could I?" Shippou smiled back.
"Inuyasha is looking all over the Nether for Zusaku, with a lot of friends. I think you're supposed to meet with them," Sesshoumaru said as Sou'unga gently released him and he hovered near.
"No," Shippou shook his head, "not Me. We," he grinned, holding out his arm.
Sesshoumaru smiled, and took hold of his hand, and something strange began to happen, and both of them began to glow greenish-purple...
"Sesshoumaru, I will carry your soul within my own orb, and guard it until we get back to your body," Sou'unga said, "for now, as a ghost, you have no weapons or means to fight this battle. But you will be safe with me, I swear it."
"I trust you," Sesshoumaru whispered, and letting himself go, he was absorbed into the orb, and Shippou, sniffing, took a moment to pause.
"He's with us," Sou'unga said softly, "and when we defeat this bird, I will take his soul in my orb back to his body, where Brother Thanh and I together might be able to recall him from death. For right now, my orb is the only vessel that can pass the Veil with his soul intact."
"I understand," Shippou agreed, "alright, let's find Inuyasha. Do you know where he is?"
"Tetsusaiga will call me to them as they travel, we shall make haste, and I will go through the convex and the concave, and the concave and the convex, and pierce the never at the end of the forever, and we will be there," he declared...
.
"So where, exactly, are we going?" Touran asked as they sped along.
"Tetsusaiga said the next thing we find will be his true form," Inuyasha spoke as they went along, "and after that, we go where he knows, to find that bird and get rid of him."
"Tetsusaiga's true form? I thought it was your Father's fang," Shunran asked, surprised.
"Well, it is," Inuyasha frowned, "but, it's more complicated than that. See, for it to do these things my Father couldn't do, it had to have this soul bound to it, and that gave it the power to absorb other powers, namely those used to make Tenseiga, you see? So now we're going to meet Tetsusaiga...well, the soul in the Nether that's bound to it, I guess. I don't know him by any other name," he added sheepishly.
"Intriguing," Kagura murmured, "Inuyasha, I think we'll recognize him..."
"Yeah, from the Staff of Dragons Jaken has," Inuyasha agreed.
"Do we know how we keep the phoenix Dead yet?" Karan asked.
"Not a clue," Inuyasha smiled, and Karan smiled back.
"That sounds fun," she grinned.
Looming in the near distance, they found what appeared to be a grove of tall, mature magnolia trees in a large circle...
"In there," Inuyasha leaped, feeilng the sword at his side pulse wildly as he burst through the row of trees...
A massive dragon-ox greeted him with a large smile, it's odd features making Inuyasha smile a wide smile.
"Tetsusaiga," he breathed, holding up the sword to the dragon before him, "I finally get to meet you in person."
"A pleasure, Inuyasha," Tetsusaiga smirked at him, "but we've got no time for small talk, have we?"
"Just one question," Inuyasha began, but before he could finish, Tetsusaiga smiled.
"Not all of us have names you could speak in your tongue. Big Brother Thanh adopted his human name, but nobody ever spoke one for me before I was Tetsusaiga. But if you want, you can call me something else. I'm not picky."
"Tetsusaiga was always fine," Inuyasha laughed, not having thought of that, but still elated to finally meet this soul in this way.
"Zusaku has nearly figured out how to get the Key, we have to get to him swiftly now. Inuyasha, use a Foxfire Meidou. Don't ask how, just feel it," Tetsusaiga said, and as he did, his form became more ethereal, and began to shrink swiftly, and channel itself into the sword, until he had vanished entirely, and the blade now swirled with green-blue foxfire and glowed with the Meidou...
Inuyasha swung, and they all went through the portal, now feeling the urgency, that there was no time to waste...
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