The Prisoner of Zendai

By UCSBDad

Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Farscape or anything of Anthony Hope's. Rating K. Time: Long, long ago in a Farscape galaxy near you.

Hentzau was desolated by my remark. "Play actor. I'm cut to the quick by your

remark. After all, I could have killed you that day you were headed for the

library. But I didn't. I deliberately missed."

That got my attention. "You missed? You frelling shot at me?"

He nodded and grinned at me. "Mikeela insisted, old boy. Said you were too

frelling dangerous to her plans to live. You are, of course, but that's hardly a

reason for me to kill you." He shook his head. "It took me ages to get dear

Mikeela back in bed with me. Two whole solar days, at least."

I gave up trying to figure out what he was up to. "Hentzau, whose side are you

on, anyway?"

He seemed genuinely surprised by the question. "Mine. Whose side did you think

I'd be on?"

Aeryn and I had our usual debate as to who would go first into the dark secret

passage. I won by reminding her that she was still the designated Queen. Aeryn

and I stepped into the dark secret passage.

If I ever get to design my very own palace, I'll leave the secret passages out.

If they're an absolute necessity, I'll make sure that they're spacious and well

lit. The passageway was so dark I had to feel my way down. Each and every

frelling step seemed to be a different width and height from all the rest.

Naturally, neither Aeryn nor I had our night vision monocular. I counted the

steps and tried to figure out how far down we had gone. I was sure we were

underground.

I put my hand up and stopped Aeryn. I leaned back to whisper to her. "I think

there's a light ahead. Be careful." Aeryn put her hand on my shoulder and

squeezed lightly.

The passageway turned once more and broadened out. Sure enough a tiny light was

ahead of us. It was still so frelling dark that I almost walked into the bars of

the cell,

"Who's there?" Called a very familiar voice.

Remembering the last time I did this, I was more cautious. "Your Majesty?"

No reply.

"John, there's a control for the light here. I'm going to turn it up." Aeryn

whispered to me.

When the light increased, I saw Queen Flavia standing there. Dirty, bedraggled

and tired, but alive.

"So, your imposter is here." She snarled at us. "I assume you're going to kill

me now. Well, go ahead you frelling cowards. Kill an unarmed woman in a cell."

Aeryn and I stood for a second, finally I found my voice. "We're not here to

kill you, Your Highness. My name's John Crichton and this is Aeryn Sun. We work

for Colonel Sapt. We're here to free you. We caught Lady Lenza and the Scarren."

I suddenly had a horrible thought. "Are there any other Scarrens or any of

Lenza's people down here?"

Queen Flavia just looked blankly at us.

"Your Highness, about the Scarrens?" I started.

She laughed. She was about a dench from being hysterical. "No, no one else is

down here. No one but me. No, that's not right. No one but the three of us. Just

us. The three of us." Maybe a dench past being hysterical

Aeryn found the key and opened the cell. Flavia stood there for a microt and

then sped out of her cell, then we helped Queen Flavia walk back up the stairs

to her Palace...

When we got back to Lenza's bedroom, we found Colonel Sapt had joined us. The

Other Aeryn nodded to Hentzau, "He said we needed to bring the Colonel in on

this."

Sapt bowed deeply to Queen Flavia. "Your Highness, my apologies for my failures

will have to wait. For now, it's important that you are alive. I'll take charge of Lady

Lenza." He turned to Lenza, "Baroness, I arrest you for high treason. I assure

you that I will personally command the firing squad that ends your life."

He grasped her arm and started to leave.

Hentzau stopped him. "I'm not sure that is the best idea."

Sapt drew himself up and just barely managed to avoid hitting Hentzau. "Listen,

you insolent puppy, your bedmate is a traitor who almost delivered the Triple

Monarchy into the hands of the Scarrens. Do you think I'm going to allow someone

like that to go free just so you keep frelling her?"

Hentzau just kept smiling. "Yes." He paused. "Well, yes and no. I'm afraid I've

seen the last of our lovely romps in bed, dear Lenza. But a treason trial will lead to

the disclosure that good Queen Flavia was impersonated by Aeryn Sun, and, er,

another Aeryn Sun." He turned and grinned at me. "How did you manage to find two

of them, Crichton? You must tell me? Can I have one of my own?" I managed to

keep both Aeryns from knocking him on his butt, and he kept talking. "Most

importantly, you'll have to let everyone know that Scarrens have an interest in us.

That they have been here and tried to replace the Queen." He stopped, and for

once in his life looked dead serious. "I guarantee that once she hears that, dear

Mikeela will try to overthrow the Queen and proclaim herself Queen. She doesn't

have the support to succeed without starting a civil war. If war starts, it'll

eventually draw in the Peacekeepers and the Scarrens."

Sapt glared at Hentzau. "What do you expect out of this, Hentzau? The Goddess

knows you're the last person in the Universe I'd expect to find worried about a

bloody civil war."

Hentzau laughed. "I want to be rich, powerful and happy. And I need a rich,

powerful and peaceful monarchy, where every faction owes me. I'm afraid the

Peacekeepers and the Scarrens aren't known for the sort of decadent luxury I

plan for myself."

Sapt looked around the room and asked Flavia for support. "Your Highness, you

can't let this, this, person avoid punishment for her treasonous acts?"

I nodded. "I'm afraid Hentzau's right. Mikeela's just looking for an excuse to

try to rebel. Once she does, the Free Strackenz people will try to take their

planet out of the monarchy. You'll be fighting a three-way civil war before you

know it."

Aeryn chimed in. "John's right. The Guard Regiment isn't strong enough to fight

off Mikeela's troops, let alone try of hold Strackenz."

Sapt was almost beside himself. "Your Highness, I beg you not to allow her to go

free."

"Certainly Colonel Sapt. Just explain how we can do so without starting an

un-winnable civil war." Flavia snapped back at him.

We all stared at Sapt. He finally just sat down heavily in a chair.

Flavia straightened her dirty dress and shook her hair into some semblance of order.

"Baroness Lenza, the Triple Monarchy has been your home. We have provided

you with a good life. A life anyone would consider better than what we would have

with Scarren masters. Can you tell me why you have done this?"

Lenza gave her a nasty smile. "Frell you, you gutless little trelk."

"If I may?" Hentzau asked. If I hadn't known him better, I would have said he was

being extra polite. "Maps aren't the only thing found in the Royal Library, you

know, Crichton. I found a most wonderful report from Lenza's trip to the Outside

so many cycles ago. I think it explains dear Lenza's sudden interest in the

Scarrens."

Lenza spat at him but missed. "Shut up, you insolent bastard. I won't have you

defile his memory with your lies."

For once Hentzau shut up and we all waited to see what Lenza would do. Finally,

she started to talk. "Seventy cycles and more ago I visited the Outside with the

only man I ever loved. We left Queen Anthea's ship together, Casso and I. We

were young, foolish and in love. All of our lives, we had been protected by our

wealth and position. We found this wasn't enough to protect us in the Outside."

She swept the Aeryns and me with a stare that was filled with hatred. "The

Peacekeepers conscripted us for one of their idiotic campaigns against someone.

Conscripted us! We were conscripted as common laborers." She stared at me and

continued in a mocking tone. "You know about recreation, don't you, Captain

Crichton? I'm sure your two identical trelks provide you with endless hours of

amusement. You can have all the sex you want, can't you? Of course, if you're a

conscripted laborer, you're expected to be grateful if some Peacekeeper bully

notices you and decides to recreate with you. Casso, my love, my only love,

tried to stop him. Casso was murdered by the Peacekeepers. I fought the bastard.

I scratched and bit and screamed obscenities at him. He and his friends thought

it was funny. A laborer who thought she was too good to frell a Peacekeeper."

Lenza looked around the room. For the first time, she looked old. She continued.

"I was raped repeatedly by the Peacekeepers for three quarters of a cycle before

I escaped. I managed to locate one of the trading houses through which our

limited trade with the Outside was conducted and got passage home. And when I

returned, I found out that no one cared. No one cared what happened Outside. No

one here knew or cared about the Peacekeepers. But I knew about you bastards,

Crichton. And I vowed that I would do everything in my power to destroy the

Peacekeepers. I made friends and allies. I became rich and powerful, but I never

made political power an end in itself. I was content to let everyone think me a

happy, stupid trelk, only interested in her next party or her next lover. But I

knew that one day I'd find a way to strike back at you bastards. Finally, the

Peacekeeper-Scarren conflict moved into this area, and I was able to contact a

Scarren patrol and offer my services. The remainder you now know. It's a shame.

I would have loved using that stupid one-eyed trelk against her own kind. I

would have loved watching you two Peacekeepers die as well. I would have killed

the man first, I think. How do you think Aeryn Sun would have reacted to your

death, John?"

I shook my head. "Lenza, Aeryn and I are not Peacekeepers."

She laughed bitterly. "Please don't treat me like an idiot now that you've won,

John."

Aeryn put a hand on my arm. "She's just too smart for us, John."

Lenza rose from her seat. "I hope that you all die slowly at the hands of the

Scarrens. I hope Crichton and Hentzau die the slowest." She made a mocking bow

to Queen Flavia. "Now, if you will forgive me, I have work to do."

Queen Flavia stopped her. "Baroness Lenza Gauthier, you have for cycles flaunted

your immorality at my court. I can no longer bear the sight of someone who whose

only goal in life is the seduction of others into your own decadent lifestyle.

You are banished from my court to your estate at Zantig. Colonel Sapt, please

take her there and away from my sight."

Sapt, with Hentzau's help led Lenza from the room.

In another half an arn, we managed to sneak the Queen back into her quarters.

Then, the Aeryns and I were comfortably ensconced in the closet while Lady

Orlika fussed over Flavia and got her ready to resume her life.

"It's a shame Lenza won't be punished for her crimes." I said.

Both Aeryns gave me the "stupid human" look I had seen before. Finally, the Other

Aeryn spoke. "I suspect that Lenza is about to have a nasty accident, John."

I thought about that one for a while.

TBC