XXII.
At the starting line, the king,
feeling in control of things,
did in his goofy guise now say:
"My sweet subjects—I've not been
once in my life so glad to tell:
Let Random Roster Race commence!"
The leader board showed sixteen spots:
Van's face was there, x'ed out: NO SHOW.
Where her kart went, was also x'ed;
the king feared not—she'd not be there.
Counting down—red, yellow, green;
the fifteen karts away did scream.
Arriving at the starting line,
Van, Ralph, and Felix were in time.
A partial story Ralph had told:
"You need not win—just cross the line,
and you will a real racer be."
Pugnaciously she did reply:
"A real racer, I already am—
and I will win! Just watch! You'll see!"
And off she sped, the race to join.
She somehow knew, the X to hit—
X from the board moved from her face.
She'd entered, now there was no doubt;
take the checkered flag—life'd change.
Speedily, she moved ahead;
passed many racers, up to fifth.
Between her and the lead stood king,
Taffyta, Rancis, Candlehead.
Rancis saw Vanellope first;
cried to the others, "It's the glitch!"
They were on a stretch of track
with cherry bombs—to Candlehead
Taffyta said, "Hey, light 'em up!"
Close to Van the bombs did blow;
this made her glitch, as was now clear
that stress brought on the glitching jags.
Cruel Taffyta looked back and laughed,
"You're just a mishap—what a joke!"
The bullies laughed—Van did persist.
And of a sudden, in a flash,
Van glitched ahead—but backward faced!
The three lost power—suddenly
they had not speed, a jump to make;
and ended race, in sticky cake.
Vanellope said to herself,
"No more glitching! Dial it in!"
At starting line, Ralph had this seen—
and said, "All right, kid, no more shocks.
Just finish up—" Then, whack! A punch
across his giant jaw was laid.
He hit the ground, and then looked up.
The Amazon from H.D., 'twas.
"Hope you're happy, pile of junk!
This game is doomed—it's all your fault!"
Felix brightly to her said,
"My lady! You came back!"
"Can it, Fix-it!" Addressing Ralph:
"That cy-bug that you brought with you
has millionfoldly multiplied."
"No, that's wrong—I saw it die
in taffy thick—believe you me!"
Scarce were these words out of his mouth
when rumbling from below the ground
exploded then a giant swarm
of cy-bugs eating all in sight.
Calhoun called to all the fans:
"Listen, everyone—you must
evacuate, to GCS!
Come on, let's go! Now, hurry up!"
Ralph and Felix set to work
to keep the finish line pristine—
free of bugs, so Van could finish;
reset the game, her dream accomplish.
Just one kart remained to pass:
the king's! Van boldly drifted by
his kart—she grinned at him, an eyebrow
raised: "See, pal: I'm good! Ta-ta!"
He dropped away, fell out of sight;
Vanellope did happily speed
through caves of ice—let out a whoop—
she'd never known such fun! Yahoo!
But, out of nowhere, in a flash,
leapt king and kart; with practiced hand,
he turned her kart completely round—
helpless her position was.
"Get off my track!" the monarch screeched.
And with a free hand, made to smash
whatever parts his scepter found
on poor Van's kart. "Are you crazy?!"
she did cry. "I do forbid
you finishing this race, you glitch!"
"Knock it off!" she yelled at him,
as with his scepter he did pound
about her ears. She grabbed the stick;
and suddenly, his visage flick'r'd—
like a glitch! "I do not plan
allowing you to undo work
I've made with effort long and hard!"
He kept on changing. "What the heck?"
She'd not let go—and at the last,
his face did change quite utterly.
Dressed in white, this stranger was.
"Who are you?" Van asked, in great fear.
"I am Turbo! Look and despair!
The greatest racer who's ever lived—
and I did not this sugary world
reprogram just to let you and that
halitosis-riddled warthog
take utterly away from me!"
At this he made another move,
Van's kart now turned upon its side.
'Twas plain his plan was her to ram
against a wall, to end her run.
"End of the line, glitch!", at her he growled.
In her mind, time did slow down.
"That's it! I can escape this trap.
I know I promised not to glitch,
but this is life and death—just once:
focus—concentrate—and—glitch!"
Hér bold plan worked to a tee;
she glitched from him, and drove off—
free! "Sweet mother of monkey milk,
I did it!" From tunnel she emerged
unscathed; meanwhile, wretched king—
enraged—cried, "No!" and followed hard.
His progress, though, was checked quite soon:
a cy-bug on the track did loom
and eat him whole. His reign did end.
Ralph and Felix had full seen
this whole exchange on Jumbotron
they now knew Turbo had not died;
but instead, had lain in wait,
a racing game his prey to make.
Ralph saw the start line turn to "Finish"—
"Bring it home, kid—the finish line
is open full—it's time to shine!"
Down the track he saw her speed—
bearing down upon her goal,
that was from her so long denied.