WARNING: Unsurprisingly for a South Park fanfiction, this fanfiction contains a lot of offensive content that may be unsuitable for some readers. I also want to remind you that I am not racist in real life; this fanfiction is made for fun. Viewer discretion is advised. Enjoy!
It all started one day when Eric Cartman, Kyle Broflovski, Stan Marsh, and Kenny McCormick left the movie theater. They had just finished seeing the movie Terrance and Phillip: The Shit Wars, and they thought it was the funniest thing in all of existence.
But, as they walked down the sidewalk, little did they know that trouble was about to emerge. A massive, luminous red light suddenly appeared in the clear blue sky, and a giant robotic lizard descended to the ground. His entire body was silvery and metallic; he even had a metallic tail with metallic scales on it. He looked like a robot doppelgänger of Godzilla; this was, without a doubt, Mechagodzilla.
"Holy fuck, guys!" said Eric. "It's Mechagodzilla!"
"Cartman, don't be a retard," said Kyle. "There's no such thing as Mechagodzilla!"
"Look!" yelled Kenny, his voice muffled under his jacket.
Eric, Kyle, Stan, and Kenny turned, and saw Mechagodzilla. His red eyes glowed bright with malevolence, and his proton scream laser blasted everywhere, sending buildings up into explosions of bright orange and debris. Down on the street, people screamed and ran away in terror, but Mechagodzilla killed each and every one of them who tried to escape from his destruction.
"Holy shit," said Stan. "Cartman was actually telling the truth for once!"
"Quick, guys!" said Eric. "We have to summon Al Gore!"
The four stooges ran back to Eric's house, and ran into his garage. Eric took out a Democratic Party flag, and waved it at the ceiling.
"Oh, great Al Gore, hear us now!" said Eric. "Mechagodzilla is killing everyone! You must have mercy and save us from this monstrosity!"
And then, Al Gore appeared in front of the four, complete with angel wings and a halo hovering above his head.
In an ultra godly cosmic voice, Al Gore spoke. "What can I do for you four fuckers?"
"Mechagodzilla is attacking South Park," said Eric. "You need to help us!"
"Well, there's only one man who can save us," said Al Gore. "ManBearPig."
Then, Al Gore's body glowed and radiated with omnipotent energy. ManBearPig formed in front of them, and let out an epic bear roar, as well as a pig squeal. He punched the garage door open, and stomped out onto the streets of South Park.
When Mechagodzilla saw ManBearPig charging toward him, he dropped the car he was holding, and his red eyes glowed even brighter. ManBearPig then proceeded to grow larger than Mechagodzilla, and he punched Mechagodzilla directly in the face.
Eric, Kyle, Stan, and Kenny watched the whole scene unfold from the garage.
"Yeah!" yelled Eric. "Kick his ass!"
ManBearPig continued to fight. He kicked Mechagodzilla in the middle of his legs, clawed at his chest, and punched him in the neck. Mechagodzilla, not knowing what to do, charged up his proton laser, and fired it directly at ManBearPig's face, sending him flying down the street. ManBearPig shrank back down to his normal size, and ran away.
"Are you fucking serious?" said Eric. "He just ran away!"
"Looks like we've gotta fight him ourselves," said Kyle.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, Peter Griffin and Rainbow Dash appeared.
"What?" said Eric. "WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!"
"Hey, I'm Peter Griffin," said Peter. "And this is Rainbow Dash."
"Hi!" said Rainbow Dash.
"How the hell did you get here?" asked Stan. "You're part of Family Guy, not South Park!"
"This is an X-overs fanfiction, so multiple cartoon characters will be appearing throughout the story," said Peter.
Suddenly, Mechagodzilla charged up another proton scream, and completely obliterated Eric's house. "Hey, can you help us defeat Mechagodzilla?" Eric asked.
"Hell yeah!" said Peter. "Let me get my teleportation device."
Peter took a teleporter out of his pocket, and made everyone touch it. He pressed the button, and they got teleported to a U.S. Military Base.
"Why are we at an army base?" asked Eric.
"We need to hijack some vehicles so we can defeat Mechagodzilla," said Peter.
Eric, Kyle, Stan, Kenny, Peter, and Rainbow Dash began walking through the base. Eric, Kyle, Stan, and Kenny found and got into a tank, while Peter and Rainbow Dash got into separate fighter jets. After initiating their vehicles, Eric, Kyle, Stan, Kenny, Peter, and Rainbow Dash began making their way back to South Park.
Back in South Park, Mechagodzilla continued to wreak havoc. He crushed buildings with his mechanical fists, shot down telephone lines with his missiles and turrets, and shot up the ground with his proton screams. By now, he had killed about 700 people, with that number climbing higher.
Suddenly, Eric, Kyle, Stan and Kenny showed up in their tank, and fired a massive shell at Mechagodzilla's chest. Mechagodzilla charged up another proton scream, but just before he could fire it, Peter and Rainbow Dash came in their fighter jets, and shot Mechagodzilla with rapid-fire bullets.
Mechagodzilla tried to swat the jets away with his tail, but another shell fired out of the tank, and it blew up a portion of the tail. Mechagodzilla balled up his mechanical fist, and slammed it down onto the ground, trying to crush the tank. However, the tank dodged Mechagodzilla's fist, and fired another shell at his chest.
Mechagodzilla charged up another proton scream, and prepared to use it to take down the fighter jets. However, just like the tank, the jets dodged the attack. Wanting to reclaim his undefeated status, Mechagodzilla shot down Rainbow Dash's jet with a missile, and punched Peter's jet down to the ground.
Peter and Rainbow Dash fell to the ground in pain, with their jets crashing down and exploding as well. Mechagodzilla let out a mechanical laugh, and swung his tail around, sending Peter and Rainbow Dash flying. They ended up on top of a building, and for some reason, this building had artillery on it.
"Peter!" said Rainbow Dash. "We can use this artillery, and take down Mechagodzilla!"
"Good fucking idea!" replied Peter.
Peter grabbed hold of the artillery, and directed it at Mechagodzilla's head. He pressed down on the firing button, and shot rapid-fire bullets directly at his face. Mechagodzilla, however, quickly noticed this, and shot the entire building down with missiles.
"Welp," said Peter. "That was a big fucking failure."
Even though both planes had been shot down, the tank was still going strong. There was only one shell left inside, so the boys had to make it count. Mechagodzilla, noticing the tank was still there, charged up one final proton scream to end the battle for good. But then, the final shell blasted out of the tank, and flew into Mechagodzilla's mouth. Mechagodzilla drew back, choking on the shell, and then finally, HE EXPLODED!
The destroyed Mechagodzilla fell to the ground, debris of mechanical pieces and metal flying in all directions. His red eyes stopped glowing, and he finally powered down. Eric, Kyle, Stan and Kenny got out of the tank, and ran over to Peter and Rainbow Dash.
"We actually fucking did it!" exclaimed Eric.
"I'd say you boys did pretty damn good," said Peter. "Wanna go to KFC and get a bucket to celebrate?"
"Hell yeah!" said Eric, and they headed to KFC.