Stay With Me - Danity Kane
Raindrops fall from everywhere
I reach out for you and you're not there
So I stood waiting in the dark
With your picture in my hands
Story of a broken heart
Stay with me
Don't let me go
Cause I can't be without you
Just stay with me
And hold me close
Because I built my world around you
And I don't wanna know what it's like without you
So stay with me
Just stay with me
I'm trying and hoping for the day
When my touch is enough to take the pain away
Cause I've searched so long the answer's clear
We'll be okay if we don't let it disappear
Stay with me
Don't let me go
Cause I can't be without you
Just stay with me
And hold me close
Because I built my world around you
And I don't wanna know what it's like without you
So stay with me
Just stay with me
I've search my heart over
So many, many times
No you and I is like no stars
To light the sky at night
Our picture hands up
To remind me of the days
You promised me we'd always
And never go away
That's why I need you to stay
Stay with me
Don't let me go
Cause I can't be without you
Just stay with me
And hold me close
Because I built my world around you
And I don't wanna know what it's like without you
So stay with me
Just stay with me
Don't leave
So I stand waiting in the dark
The night before her wedding. She should feel nervous and excited. Eager to begin a new chapter in her life. And yet even though she knew that Colin would do the honourable thing and marry her, she was uncertain as to what sort of marriage it would be. She did feel better after speaking with Madam de la Croix, but that could be the amount of alcohol they had consumed.
"What are you doing out here?" She had been so caught up in running her conversation with Genevieve through her head that she hadn't seen Colin.
"I was …." She was not ashamed of her friendship with the modiste. After all, she had been there for her when nobody else was.
"No. In fact, do not answer that. It is clear I found you in the midst of some … secret dealings. I do not wish to know." What exactly did he think she was doing? She hadn't published as Whistledown since the evening he had discovered her secret.
"And what 'secret dealings' have I found you in the midst of, all alone the night before our wedding?" Now she was mad. She could smell the alcohol on him.
"What right do you have to ask me that?" That just made him mad. "After all the secrets you kept." She had kept one secret. "All of the things you have written over the years." Ok, he had her on that one. "All of the damage you have done."
"You are right. I realize how much damage I have done, and I am so, so sorry for it." Now was not the time to point out that if she had just been listened to as Penelope there would not have been a need to publish as Whistledown.
"What were you thinking… when you wrote about Eloise?" He of all people should know how stubborn Eloise was when she did not want to listen.
"I was trying to protect her." And she had a time limit with which to come up with a plan. "I realize now how misguided I was."
"And when you wrote about Miss Thompson? Exposing her as you did." Oh God. Was he not over Marina? "Ruining her." She had been ruined long before Whistledown exposed her.
"I thought I was protecting you." She couldn't have let him enter into a marriage where everything about it would have been a lie.
"Then you should've told me to my face." She had. She had even told him that she had seen Marina's love letters from another man. Still not the best time to point that out.
"I know." There would be no reasoning with him while he was this angry.
"Or do you not respect me enough? It is clear you do not after what you have written about me this year, that I hardly know myself." She had known that would come back to bite her. "What were you thinking then?"
"I was thinking… that I simply wanted the Colin I know back." The Colin who didn't feel the need impress others. "Not this stoic man you returned as acting as if you care for no one and need nothing. It's you. Kind and feeling, occasionally excitable, good-hearted man I love." Especially the excitable part. "I should have told you myself. There are so many things I should have done myself. And now, with the confidence you've helped me find this year, I am finally able to." Without him, she would never have found the courage to even speak to other gentleman at the balls. Let alone be almost proposed to by Lord Debling.
"So then, you do not need Whistledown anymore." She wouldn't go that far.
"I do not need to hide behind Whistledown anymore, but I am not saying there is not any valve in it." On occasion it was the only way she was heard.
"Do you know what is most humiliating?" That she was Whistledown? Someone who a lot of people admired when they barely considered Penelope. "I let you talk so much about my journal as if I were to be this… great writer." So this was about his insecurities? "When all this time, you have been a published writer renowned across Mayfair."
"Colin, I meant everything I said about your writing." She hadn't complemented his writing just to boost his ego. She had been surprised herself when she had read his journal at how well he wrote.
"You are putting yourself in danger being out here tonight." Clearly not as she had been coming out alone at night for years. "And you've been putting yourself in danger living this double life all along."
"I have been careful." And nobody had even noticed that she kept disappearing until she became engaged.
"You have been foolish." She had been successful.
"Colin, I can take care of myself." She had to. Especially considering she was practically invisible in her own home.
"Then what good am I to you?" He didn't have to be useful to her for her to love him. She had loved him since they were children.
"Colin, I love you." That's what use he was to her. "I love you."
For a moment he looked taken aback. They were after having a full blown argument in the middle of town. Behaviour that was so unlike both of them. Then he glanced down at her lips and then back up to her eyes before surging forward to kiss her. All thoughts left her mind as she was shuffled backwards against a shop door. She blindly stepped back onto the doorstep so they were on a more equal level. When he moved to her neck she almost lost her footing but his hand was urging her to wrap her leg around him while he made his way under her dress until his fingers found her core.
If a carriage hadn't passed at the moment he would have had her screaming out in pleasure in the middle of the town. "Stay still." He seemed to have forgotten where they were as well. Checking they hadn't been spotted, he led her down the street to her waiting carriage. Helping her in, he closed the door. A part of her wanted him to climb in after her and finish what he had started. "I shall see you tomorrow." That's right, they were getting married. She managed to nod before the carriage departed.
Letting herself in the house for what would possibly be the last time, she wondered if there was any chance of sleep. She was already nervous about the wedding. Although she and Colin had not resolved anything, she had still managed to get a little insight into the extent that he was bothered by her secret life. However she could not predict what the future held for them and that scared her even more.