I was moving! I finally settled into my new pad. Thank you for waiting for this new chapter. I also had to take a break because writing lemon is kind of . . . embarrassing?
( 〃▽〃). I stored up some courage to 'study up' on the lemons from my fanfic faves. I hope this chapter brings you joy
Bwahahaha!
Thank you!
Louis was feeding into AJ's enthusiasm and AJ was fueling Louis's. As the trio walked to their respective rooms, AJ and Louis found more and more things to laugh about.
The affable mood was lulling to Clementine. The mood did not soften Louis's lightning gazes. Each time Louis looked back, Clementine jolted.
They made it to their door and Clem laid on them the wet blanket.
"Alright AJ time for bed".
"But Clem," AJ whined "I'm wide awake. Do I really have to go to bed right now?".
"Yes AJ you do. We all need to go to bed, get some rest and wake up tomorrow, bright and early". She was vacillating inside. Today felt special, like a weird holiday.
AJ pouted and crossed his arms
"You didn't wake up early today".
Louis crouched behind AJ "He got you there babe". This sweetened AJ's sour mood.
AJ groused "Babe? Eyuck"".
They were all kids; would it be so bad to act like one?
Louis seemed to notice Clementine's warring thoughts and spoke up "I wouldn't mind spending more time with AJ". That caught her attention.
"We could go to my room and hang out, just a little while longer, and I can bring AJ to your room when he's nice and tuckered out".
AJ gasped. Clementine would look like a wicked witch if she said no. But that wasn't what she was worried about
"Are you sure? Do you have enough energy for that Louis?".
"Trust me, I've got plenty". Louis winked at Clementine and a longing shiver ran along her body. She had to get out of here before she melted before his feet. The sight would upset AJ but Louis would chuckle in masculine pride.
Clem fixed a firm gaze on AJ who was as excited as a kid in a candy shop. It was his first late night with anybody other than her.
"AJ, listen. Be polite be respectful and when Louis says you have to go back
to your room, no talking back, okay?".
"Really? I can go? Really?"
"Yes AJ. You can".
AJ hugs Clem's waist and thanks her. She pats his soft head and can barely lift her eyes to Louis before AJ dashes off to Louis's room.
"It's a race!" AJ shouts. Louis looks to Clem, to AJ and back to Clem, he couldn't decide if he wanted to kiss her or speed ahead.
"Go on now, before you lose". Clem says.
"Are you sure I can-"
"Haha no no I'm beat. Have fun".
He kissed her on the cheek before shifting his feet and jetting towards his room.
This was an awesome relationship. No second thoughts, no misgivings, no seed of doubt poisoning her stomach. Louis was a sure thing. AJ was feisty, but he was a good kid. Louis had just taken custody of AJ. And her heart was in a vice grip from the love.
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It was a conundrum. Louis wondered if he should get like a monkey and jump on the bed or, protect his triple twin deluxe bed. To be cool or not to be cool, that was the question. AJ giggled fiercely and stuck his arms in a v shape. "What are you doing AJ?"
"I'm practicing flying". Louis looked at him quizzically.
"What?" AJ said. "It could happen".
"You think you'll fly like that? Let me show you how it's done".
Louis hopped on the bed, balanced on a leg and stuck the other behind him. He lifted his arms ahead of him like superman and said "This is how I fly".
"Can you fly? I've never seen you do it".
"Haha isn't that why we're practicing in the first place?".
"Show me show me show me". AJ repeated.
Louis acted like a goofball if AJ was in the right mood, you could see his goofiness was bone deep. Clem nicknamed him right. AJ jumped, Louis caught him under the arms and spun him around. Louis sang a song from a cartoon show he watched as a kid. To which AJ laughed loudly and said "That song is aweesooome!"
"Yeah", Louis said while putting AJ down. "And I just made it up, right now".
"Woow Louis is it another song that you wrote?".
"Well, actually-"
"Can you teach me to write songs?". This was taking an interesting turn. Louis expected a night of running around, dogs chasing their tails and maybe some more racing in the school. This request was welcome but unexpected. Louis got down to his level and questioned him
"You know AJ, writing music is a serious thing that requires focus. You can't run around or jump up and down when you're composing".
"Composing? What's that?". AJ asked.
"It means writing music".
"Okay". AJ looked around the room. Louis didn't have an instrument in his room. Just his beds, candles attached to the wall, bookshelves mixed with his belongings and books and a desk.
AJ turned back to Louis and said, "No. I'm kinda tired. I'd like to learn about music. Is that okay?".
Louis loved Clementine. Loved her. Loved her so much he was embarrassed. He was a total schmuck for her and she knew it. He had an inkling he would endure the various petty violences young lovers commit on one another if he had to. Thankfully, she would never test his love like This rush of warmth in his chest took Louis by surprise. He loved AJ, he was more compatible with him than Tenn he was a boy who preferred his alone time. He liked playing with AJ and watching him grow. Now that Clementine had one leg, they were an excellent duo with banter and hunting galore.
But when he had to admit it, in the grizzly catacombs of his heart, he loved that Clementine loved his relationship with AJ. He knew it was shameful! His relationship with AJ was sincere, seriously! But Louis couldn't deny Clementine was a pretty big part of forgiving, and loving this child. AJ was an extension of her. And he loved Clementine so much, that he loved her kid just for being her kid.
That question made Louis see AJ in a brand new light. He lost his swagger, scratched his head and said "If you really want to- we can do anything you want though buy yeah writing music is pretty cool". Louis spoke quickly.
AJ jumped up and down. It was cute how often he did it. Like it was the only way he could express his joy. Louis pulled blank music sheets from a binder on his bookshelf. He and AJ sat cross legged on the ground. Louis began explaining music notes, the bars on the paper then backtracked, explaining why this paper had lines written on it instead of why these black balls were there. What they were. There were letters on the paper but the black balls were the letters. And not the whole alphabet either.
"AJ, do you know the alphabet? Let's sing it together. Great!". This paper only had the letters A through G. Louis did all of this in earnest. His heart was full of what could only be considered paternal.
Louis thought of his dad. Pangs of guilt and love and grief bled into his heart. Louis was so emotional he kept teaching music to keep the tears right in his eyes, not on his face. Then he chuckled. Everytime he thought of it, he laughed a little more. It was making his emotional mood a light-hearted one. AJ asked "what's so funny?".
Louis said "Nothing, it's nothing". Louis shot AJ a meaningful look "I swear".
AJ accepted it.
It was pretty awkward to admit. He kinda felt like a dad!
Louis saw AJ nodding off a little. "Hey, AJ, you getting sleepy?".
"NO!" he protested. "I'm just cold is all".
"Yeeaaahhh your cold looks a lot like sleepy to me but here," Louis went to his bed and pulled plush comforter around AJ.
"That'll keep you warm".
"Thanks Louis!" AJ smiled easily. Then he pointed to the sharp sign.
"So what's this? It looks scratchy".
Louis dove back into his music lesson.
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This . . was not working.
It was the first time Clementine slept alone in 6 years. Her mind was racing. She was missing AJ something fierce. Surprisingly, she trusted Louis. Could you blame her? No, she wasn't blinded by love and acting like a dumb struck girl. Or so she hoped. Because she was. Still, she saw Louis as something like a father figure to AJ. Initially she grouped Louis to a companion like Tenn, a boy that AJ could play with. Then Louis grew from foolhardy to downright dependable.
Even at ten years old Clementine doubted everyone's ability to take care of the boy. Probably because AJ's mother Rebecca died with AJ in her lap. Moments away from turning him. Arlo the assaulter, Luke suspended in frosty water, Jane . . . Jane, she. . .
That nightmare blinded her as if she were looking at snow in the sunshine. Her body popped off of the bed like a plastic ball in a child's corn popper.
Quickly she thought of her favorite guys. What were they up to? she wondered. She sat on the bed. AJ had been with Louis for a few hours. Maybe they fell asleep? Clementine grabbed her crutches.
"Wait". She hesitated. She had never been in Louis's room. She wasn't invited. AJ was. Was she really getting nervous? After what she and Louis did today?
"Grow up Clementine!". She chided herself, did that really matter? Louis had been in her room multiple times. They had their first date here. Why was she being so, skittish? Clementine, wanting to shake off her cold feet and run away from nightmares pressed her crutches under her arms, headed out the door with Louis's room as the destination.
She entered the hall. On her way to Louis's room she did not think how the halls reminded her of the blaring sirens, blood red lights and the caretaker she had to shoot between the eyes to rescue AJ. She did not think of the shed she was trapped in by the people who would become her travel companions, then inmates, then the dead. As her crutches quietly squeaked against the floorboards she also did not think of her death. AJ's death. Lee's death. Of Lee . . .
Clementine stood outside of Louis's door, solemn. She did not think of those things. She didn't have to. One does not have to remember their life for it to affect them. They only had to breathe.
Heavy and immobile. This was where she wanted to be, all night if she was honest with herself. Why was she alone in the first place? Did they abandon her? Clementine tried to think of Ruby's words. Tried extracting the comfort from them like the earthiness of a honey suckle. But it all felt bitter. The peace of the school was crushing her. Where was she supposed to be? What could she do as a cripple? She stood like a statue outside of the only place in the world she wanted to be.
She heard groaning then the footsteps of a sleepwalker. Downcast Clementine, Louis walked right into her. Head first, bone to bone, skull cracking. Clumsy little survivors would have bound to their feet if they individually had a pair.
Louis woke himself up. He grabbed Clementine's shirtfront. Her nose collided with his collarbone and her hips crashed onto his. Louis was too groggy to handle all the woman that was coming at him, so he fell, straight on his back. He hadn't hit his head, so the only bad thing that happened was that he was now fully awake.
The good thing? Clementine. His voice was rough with sleep
"Clemclem? Whattryou dewing?".
Clementine picked herself off of Louis "I wanted to check on you and AJ". She remembered "I thought he was going to come back to my room". She was able to save face. She felt silly admitting she felt lonely without AJ by her side.
Louis looked at her as best he could. The candles were out and the room was illuminated by the slim moon alone. She could make out AJ on the floor, wrapped in a huge fluffy blanket that doubled as a pillow. Their clumsiness had not awoken him but the head cracking sure felt noisy to them. Louis couldn't remember why he was getting up, wasn't to go to the bathroom. He had an empty bladder. He just had an urge to open the door. And now that he had, he thought it was a divine intervention. Clementine fidgeted
"Hey Louis?"
"Yeah?"
"Would it be crazy if, I spent the night in your room?"
" . . . ."
"AJ's already asleep. I wouldn't want to move him all the way to my room, it might wake him up and he's sleeping so peacefully"
"Yes".
Louis first picked AJ up and slipped him into bed. Then he assisted Clementine into the bed. Before she swung her foot onto the sheets, he grabbed her boot and began untying it. She protested then he muttered
"Nobootsonmybedyougrandma". The excitement was dying down and he was falling asleep.
He placed her leg on the bed and tucked her in. She was on the outside of the bed beside AJ. Louis jumped onto the other side of AJ, undulating the other people on the bed. AJ shuffled on and turned towards Clementine. He squinted and said "Clem?".
"Hey little guy".
"Clem". AJ scooted into Clementine's welcoming embrace and fell fast asleep.
Louis looked at Clementine. These boys were sorcerers. With two glances her anxieties vanished into thin air. Backlit by the moon Louis's face was shadowed and his acorn colored eyes glimmered. He was casting a spell of sleep. Before she drifted off she felt like a child. Profoundly safe, warm and loved. Like a child, with a child in her arms. Instead of mourning the parental figures she lost, those nasty truths scattered in like leaves in a sea of peaceful slumber.