A/N: Hello, Literati-loving folks! This little ficlet is my Christmas gift to you (if you don't celebrate Christmas, call it a Holiday gift or just a Winter/December gift, whatever suits you!) and I hope you like it. Not really sure where the idea came from, it just appeared in my head and demanded I share it's cuteness, so that's what I'm doing. Hope anybody who reads it enjoys it :)

Summary: Jess had been hoping to avoid Stars Hollow (mostly Rory) but Luke has decided he wants everybody over for Christmas this year. There has to be a reason, but it might not be what Jess thinks it is...

Disclaimer: All recognisable characters and dialogue from Gilmore Girls belong to Amy Sherman-Palladino and other folks who aren't me.

A Sentimental Feeling

When they invited him for Christmas, Jess meant to say no. It would have made things much easier if he had, he was sure, but in the end, he just couldn't come up with a reasonable excuse. Luke wanted him there, as always, and though he hadn't made it back to the Hollow every year for the festivities, denying his uncle a family Christmas a month after his wedding, it just seemed cruel.

"I really want everybody to be here this year," he had insisted. "And I know you have a life of your own and other people you might want to spend time with, but just this once, I would really appreciate if you could make it. I know April would love to see you, and Lorelai even seems positive about having you with us."

That part sounded a little sketchy, not to mention the fact that Luke seemed determined not to mention Rory at all. She was always the clincher. Jess could hardly a remember a time when she hadn't been. From the moment he met her, she had always been a major factor in his life, whether he was seeing her regularly or not. He doubted that was ever going to change.

By the time he showed up on the doorstep, armed with flowers and chocolates for Lorelai, Jess found he only had to fake his smile a little bit. After all, the house did look like something out of a Hallmark movie, and as much as he professed to hate that kind of thing, even he would admit, after a drink or two, that it didn't always suck to be part of a family Christmas sometimes. April was genuinely pleased to see him, and even Lorelai looked like she might mean her welcome. Luke was effusive as ever about having all his favourite people altogether. Then there was Rory.

She was as beautiful as ever, which came as no surprise. Her enthusiasm was all for her book, the one topic that Jess had felt able to keep on talking to her about in the last month, albeit mostly via email. As she sent over chapter upon chapter for his 'expert eye', he gave her the benefit of his experience in both writing and editing, assuring her many times that she was just as qualified as he was. They didn't talk about anything else. He didn't really know how to broach any of it, least of all the feelings that had kicked up in his heart, the moment he saw her again after so long apart.

"I'm so glad you're here," she told him, emerging from the kitchen and catching him in a big, warm hug before he had a chance to even pretend he might evade.

"Merry Christmas, Rory," he said softly.

"Merry Christmas, Jess," she replied in kind, pulling back to look at him.

Something other than festive joy must have shown through in his expression, because she immediately began to frown at him. He worked at forcing the smile back on his lips, but it was too late. She was too smart not to know things were not quite right.

"You really don't want to be here?" she checked, her voice low, as her eyes shifted sideways to where Luke was talking with Lorelai and April.

"I'm fine being here," he insisted, shaking his head.

She didn't believe him, he knew that, but the moment Luke approached, slapping him on the shoulder and asking him if he wanted a beer, Jess knew Rory wouldn't say anymore. She wouldn't spoil Christmas for her loved ones, even if she thought maybe he might end up doing it himself.

With everybody altogether for a while after that, there was no chance to talk privately. Still, Jess was aware of Rory watching him, studying him, just waiting to pounce with questions he didn't have the answers to, or maybe he did, but he was almost certain she wouldn't really want to hear them, if she knew what they were.

As good as her word, Lorelai actually seemed genuinely pleased to have Jess in her home for the festive occasion, making a big deal of calling him 'nephew-in-law' and including him in all things, whether he cared to be dragged in or not. Movie bashing. Board games. Last-minute tree-trimming. Even cookie decorating, as if they were all five years old. He did it all and he didn't complain, partly for Luke's sake, partly because for as long as he was involved in the activities, he wasn't likely to end up alone and awkward with Rory and the conversation he knew had to come eventually.

At the end of the day, when it was well and truly dark outside, and the clock was fast closing in on midnight, April yawned a mighty yawn and said she was headed to bed. Lorelai made a joke about Santa forsaking them all if they weren't asleep by midnight and convinced Luke they should head on up too.

"You coming, Rory?" April asked her step-sister, the two of them apparently top-and-tailing like girls at a slumber party in the too small downstairs bedroom, while Jess' own place was to be the couch.

"Ah, I'll just tidy up out here and make sure your cousin has enough blankets," she said, waving her hand absently.

If the smirk on April's face meant anything, Jess wasn't about to ask what it was. As if he didn't know. Not that he really knew how to talk to Rory about it either. To think there had been times in their lives when they could talk to each other about just about anything. After so much water under the bridge, it ought to be that way, except one particular point between them never did seem fully resolved, at least, not on Jess' side. Sometimes, he really wished feelings were as easy to turn off as he used to pretend they were when he was seventeen or so.

"So..." said Rory, turning around from the kitchen counter with a bottle of wine in one hand and two glasses in the other. "I think we need to talk."

Before Jess could either agree or disagree, she was headed for the living room and sitting herself down on his bed for the night. Apparently, she wasn't giving him a choice about the talking, or the drinking, from the way she was pouring out two very generous glasses of wine. Hesitating in the doorway a second, Jess chose the armchair, not even looking at Rory when he took the glass she held out in his direction.

"Cheers?" she suggested and he glanced up just enough to clink their glasses together.

"Cheers," he intoned, before taking a long drink.

"I don't know how much you heard from Luke, but about a month ago, right around the time of the wedding actually, I, uh... I thought I was pregnant."

It took everything Jess had not to do a spit-take and he was sure Rory had noticed when he saw the smile pulling at her lips. "Did you time that on purpose?" he asked, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand.

"Maybe a little," she admitted, giggling into her own glass held close to her lips with both hands. "I'm sorry, I just wondered if that was why you'd been so distant lately. I know you never liked Logan, and I just thought... Well, apparently that's not it, since you didn't even know about my false alarm."

"It was a false alarm." Jess nodded in understanding. "So, does that mean...? Uh, are you okay?"

She seemed okay. She had been smiling and laughing and drinking and eating all day long, with everybody else. No hint of pain or concern at all. She wasn't pregnant, but if she really believed she was, there had to be a reason, maybe more than one symptom, and if they weren't because of a baby...

"I'm fine," she promised, nodding her head, then taking another sip. "I was stressing a lot and not eating so well and... well, the doctor checked, a lot, just to be sure, but normal service has been resumed and I'm fine now. I promise, I really am."

That last part proved to Jess he must have looked as worried as he felt, but the moment he knew she really was okay, he relaxed a little. Still, he felt the need to fortify himself with another gulp of wine, very aware that although Rory was okay, she was still most likely looking to poke at why he wasn't a hundred percent himself.

"Honestly, I don't know what I was thinking, seeing Logan again, like I did," she admitted with a sigh. "I mean, if he were single, it would have been dumb enough, but making myself the affair..." she trailed off, shaking her head as Jess looked on. "I'm sorry, you probably don't want to hear about any of that."

"It's fine," he told her, an out and out lie, but what else could he say? If she needed to talk, he wanted always to listen. "It is what it is."

He said it without really thinking about it, and yet, the moment she called him on his choice of words, the significance of them came rushing back to him in an instant.

"You know, you said that to me once before, about what was between us. You and me," she clarified. "'It is what it is'," she quoted with a sad smile, putting her glass down on the table and moving right up to the end of the couch, so that they were that bit closer. "Jess... writing the book has made me think about the relationships in my life, all the relationships really, but some more than others. I've really been thinking a lot about you and me, how we met and became friends, but a very lot about when we were together."

Jess had to clear his throat pretty hard before he could speak. "You, uh, you didn't write that part in the book."

"Yes, I did," Rory corrected him immediately, ducking her head a little. "I just didn't know how to share it with you. I knew I had to talk to you about it first, in person," she confessed, seemingly making herself look at him as she did so. "It's why I asked Luke to get you here for Christmas."

"Huh."

It was the only response Jess could find to what she was telling him, unsure as yet that he was prepared to let himself believe it might mean. All he knew so far was that Rory wanted to talk to him, in person, about writing their teenage romance into her book. That didn't necessarily have a positive or a negative slant, at least, not until she said so. Jess wished he was brave enough to ask, one way or the other, but even one more gulp of wine, which emptied the glass, wasn't enough courage.

"Are you mad?" Rory asked then.

Jess shook his head in immediate denial. "That you wanted me here for Christmas to talk to me? No," he insisted. "Just curious what the big deal is. What happened with you and me, it's long over. I mean, it can't exactly matter anymore, right?"

He glanced up at her then, expecting she had probably looked away, but he was wrong. Their eyes met, gazes locked, and it felt like one of the most significant moments of Jess' life was about to occur, everything hanging on whatever Rory was about to say next.

"It matters to me," she told him softly, seeming to lean in closer, though he hardly dare believe it was true. "I was hoping that, maybe, it still mattered to you too?"

Jess knew it was going to end badly, because it always ended badly with them, and yet, with Rory so close, looking and sounding so hopeful for the kind of reciprocation he only wanted to give, he let himself be the same fool for love he always was before when it came to her.

Closing the distance between them, he let his lips find Rory's own and he kissed her. As she kissed him back, her hand behind his head to keep him close, Jess' heart soared. It was officially his favourite Christmas ever, even if this was all there was to it, just one good kiss and a spark of something that felt a lot like hope.

"So," she said breathlessly, when they finally parted, "it does matter."

Jess nodded his head. "It really does," he told her. "But what does that mean, for you? I mean, I know what it means for me, what it's always meant for me. Rory?" he checked, when she glanced away then.

"Honestly? I don't know. Lately, I don't know much of anything, but I have figured out the most important things, I think," she confirmed, meeting his gaze once more. "I know I want to finish this book. I know that no matter what I end up doing for a career, I always want to be close to Stars Hollow and my family and friends, because home means so much to me. And I know that... that I love you, Jess. That of all the guys that have been in my life, I have never felt about any of the others, the way I feel about you. Looking back at the past has kind of brought the future into focus for me, and if you feel the same way, which it seems like you probably do," she said with a smile, "I'd really like us to see what might be between us now, and if we can make something real work here."

Though he hadn't realised until she was done talking and he attempted to make some kind of answer, Jess knew he was beaming brighter than the sun ever had after that little speech.

"Sounds like a plan to me," he told Rory then, his hand at her cheek. "Merry Christmas, Rory," he said fondly, pulling her closer.

"Merry Christmas, Jess," she replied, just before their lips met one more time.

The End

A/N2: Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Seasons Greetings, as is applicable to you and yours :)