Introduction:

Set at the end of Fifty Shades Darker during Christian's birthday party. What if after the confrontation with Elena, Ana continues having second thoughts about marrying Christian? Will Christian have to change his fifty ways and convince her she's ALL he needs or will Ana come to trust and understand that she's enough for him? What if Ana had changed her mind? ALL MISTAKES ARE MINE.

Chapter One: We Should Wait.

Christian POV

Dr. Flynn smiles kindly at us and congratulates us as we stand arm in arm-in the hallway.

I close the door as he and Rhian take their leave. We return to the party, still in full swing. Grace is singing karaoke on some game console in the family room. Kate and Mia are giving her a run for her money.

"It's been quite a day."

"Christian, recently, every day with you has been quite a day," she tells me in a sardonic tone.

I shake my head. "Fair point, well made. Miss Steele. Come. I want to show you something."

I take her head and lead her through the house to the kitchen where Carrick, Ethan, and Elliot are talking Mariners, drinking the last of the cocktails, and eating leftovers.

"Off for a stroll?" Elliot teases suggestively as we make our way through the french doors.

I ignore him. Carrick frowns at Elliot, shaking his head in silent rebuke.

As we make our way up the steps to the lawn she takes off her shoes. The half-moon shines brightly over the bay casting everything in a myriad shades of gray as the lights of Seattle twinkle in the distance. The Lights to the boathouse are on, a soft glowing beacon in the cool cast of the moon.

She tells me she'd like to go to church tomorrow.

"Oh?"

"I prayed you'd come back alive, and you did. It's the least I could do."

We wander hand in hand in a relaxed silence. We talk about Jose's photos and the remodeling of the new house.

I finger the velvety box tucked in my jacket's front pocket. I'm feeling good about us. Back at the party, we formally announced our engagement. The response from everyone was overwhelmingly positive, and I successfully dodged the question about the ring.

"I remember the last time you took me to the boathouse," she tells me.

I chuckle quietly. "Oh, that was fun. In fact…" I scoop her over my shoulder, and she squeals.

"You were angry if I remember correctly."

"Anastasia, I'm always really angry."

I playfully swat her behind and stop outside the wooden door. I slide her down my body and back to the ground and take her head in my hands.

A shadow crosses her eyes, but I decide to ignore it.

I lean down and kiss her hard. My heart is beating fast, I'm excited. I step forward. "I've something to show you in here," I murmur and open the door to the motorboat. I take her hand and lead her up the wooden stairs to the attic. I open the door and step aside to let her in.

Her mouth drops open when she steps into the room filled with flowers. There are beautiful wild meadow flowers mixed with glowing Christmas lights and miniature lanterns glowing soft and pale around the room.

"You wanted hearts and flowers," I murmur.

She blinks up at me, speechless.

"You have my heart," I say, waving toward the room.

"And here are the flowers," she completes the sentence. She doesn't smile, and my gut tells me something is not quite right. No, I tell myself she must be feeling nervous.

"Christian, it's lovely," she says with a forced smile.

Tugging her hand, I pull her fully into the room, and then, I sink into one knee in front of her and produce a ring from the inside pocket in my jacket. The ring is quite impressive—three-carat, oval platinum.

"Anastasia Steele. I love you. I want to love, cherish, and protect you for the rest of my life. Be mine. Always. Share my life with me. Marry me."

I look up at her expectantly. Tears start falling down her face. I soon realize they're not tears of happiness, and my heart sinks faster than the Titanic.

"God, Christian, I'm sorry… I can't... I can't marry you."

There must be something really wrong with my hearing. We've told everyone. She cannot change her mind like that.

I rise to my feet very slowly. I'm trying to stay cool, but it's getting harder by the second. What the FUCK is this? I want to yell. I run a hand through my hair, trying to calm down. "What do you mean you can't marry me?"

"Marriage is such a big step. I won't repeat my parents' mistakes. They say it's best to be in a relationship for at least two years before considering marriage...and you and I, we..."

I feel my face flush with emotion. I look around me in disgust. This is a major disaster. "Why are you doing this Anastasia?" I hiss. "You said you loved me... …"

"Christian. Of course, I love you. But…I think we're moving too fast-we should wait."

"WAIT? Wait for what?"

This 'waiting' sounded a lot like the string of break-up lines such as "we need to talk" or "I need some space." They all sound very different, yet they say 'goodbye' faster than signing off your old AOL account.

With an angry cry, I grab her arm and glare at her.

"Let go," she demands, both angry and frightened. " I'm NOT leaving you, Christian," she tries to reassure me, and something clicks inside my head. The last thing I want to do is hurt her, so I let go of her arm. "Christian, I don't want to break up with you, I love you. But getting married is such a huge commitment." She takes a deep breath and lets it out with an audible sigh. " I'm not ready to get married, I need more time..."

My brain skips over the part where she tells me she loves me. All I care about is the last part when SHE TELLS ME AGAIN she doesn't want to marry me. I feel like I'm a ticking bomb about to explode.

"You…you can't do this!"

"Please try to understand," she begs. "I need time. You never give me time to think!"

Ana tries to touch my arm, but I pull away as if she were a venomous snake. It's the same arm that's still holding the velvet box with the ring. My fingers tighten around it for a few seconds, and then I fling it across the room before I bolt out the door.

"Christian!" I hear her calling after me, but I don't care, I don't care anymore. I walk away and can't help but hear Elena's words playing in my head. Love is for fools, Christian.

I've been nothing but a fool, I realize. The truth stares me right in the face and slaps me hard. If she truly loved me, she would say yes. I cross the lawn under the dramatic red-orange moonlight, and I fume. How could I have been so fucking blind? I never even saw this coming.

A/N:

This story is a repost originally published in 2018 in collaboration with Calicuttie77. IT IS COMPLETE. I took it down a couple of years ago after it was completed. I will be making a few edits ( editing never ends!) and posting the chapters twice a week.