The darkness of the night enveloped everything in sight as Kevin Smith's castle stood front and center. A bolt of lightning illuminated the darkness as our heroes arrived to challenge Kevin Smith head on.
Our heroes walked through the gloominess of the night, before stumbling upon a large stone door with three circular slots in place of a knob.
Martin said "this is it everyone, take out your jewels and place them into the door."
The man with a dream then placed his jewel in the central slot of the door.
Mr. Teacherman happily skipped over towards the door and placed his jewel in the door with utmost care and love.
He then proceeded to rape one trillion babies a second later.
Bobobo and Michael Jordan looked at each other nervously before Bobobo pulled out a rock with googly eyes.
Bobobo then anxiously put the rock into the slot and said "well, down the hatch."
As soon as this happened, the ground then began to rumble ferociously.
Martin then yelled "WHAT JUST HAPPENED!?"
Bobobo and Michael Jordan shrugged their shoulders before Bobobo said "well, its funny you should ask that. See, me and my team did a silly little thing and lost the jewel"
"YOU WHAT!?"
Before Martin could rant at Bobobo and the others for their stupidity, a door opened up on the side of Kevin Smith's castle and the Justice League began to feel a dark presence looming over them.
This dark presence was a green hedgehog with blue shoes and white gloves. This hedgehog also just so happened to be the leader of North Korea.
It was the coolest dude around, Kim Jong Un the Hedgehog!
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! NOT KIM JONG UN THE HEDGEHOG!" yelled Busta Rhymes.
Martin then asked "you two have history together?"
"Nah, I just really hate Sonic the Hedgehog. Golden Axe is the only Sega franchise that I love."
Kim Jong Un the Hedgehog then reached into…. somewhere, and pulled out a medieval broadsword.
Gumby stepped forward and said "its ok guys, we can take him"
Kim Jong Un the Hedgehog then snapped his fingers and his two friends, a purple Echidna named Mussolini the Echidna and a white hedgehog named Genghis Khan the Hedgehog spontaneously appeared alongside him.
Gumby just said "ok, that might be a problem,"
Our heroes took on a fighting stance, aside from Mr. Teacherman and the Teletubbies, who were just sitting there reading Nintendo Power Magazine, and prepared for battle.
Kim Jong Un the Hedgehog then cleared his throat and shouted "SHOW NO MERCY" before the three of them began rushing our heroes.
Busta Rhymes just pulled out a minigun that fires pandas and said "alright you hedgehog fucks, I'll teach you what a real video game is like" before letting loose a stream of pandas at the trio of dictators.
Kim Jong Un and Mussolini were hit by the pandas, but Genghis Khan the hedgehog jumped over the pandas and nailed the rapper in the face with a jump kick.
Genghis Khan then followed it up with an uppercut and a punch to the kidney, causing Busta Rhymes to fall to his knees and say "you suuuuuuuuuuuck" before Genghis Khan batted him away.
Genghis Khan the hedgehog then said "He won't be coming black anytime soon"
Mussolini the Echidna then did a rimshot on pair of drums.
Bobobo then cried out "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! YOU KILLED TUPAC!"
Martin then yelled out "THAT'S NOT TUPAC! THAT'S BUSTA RHYMES!"
Bobobo then went up to Busta Rhymes and began hurriedly shaking him while saying "C'mon Tupac, you gotta get up!"
"Nigga I'm not Tupac" said Busta Rhymes.
"OH NO HE'S DELIRIOUS!" said Bobobo
Bobobo then pulled out a giant pizza roll and slammed Busta Rhymes on the head with it, knocking the rapper unconscious.
Bobobo then smirked and said "heh, I always hated your music Tupac. Why couldn't you be a quality rapper like Busta Rhymes instead?"
The entire team facepalmed at that.
Bobobo then looked over at Genghis Khan the hedgehog and said "HOW DARE YOU KILL TUPAC!? HE WAS MY BEST FRIEND!" while crying his eyes out.
Genghis Khan just said "WHAT? BUT I THOUGHT YOU HATED HIM!?"
Bobobo then began rushing towards Genghis Khan the hedgehog and bashed him over the head with a lifesize model of Thomas the Tank Engine.
The Green M&M and Martin Luther King Jr just looked at each other before nodding their heads in agreement.
The two then yelled out "CIVIL RIGHTS M&M BLAST" before firing a beam containing tons of M&Ms and civil rights documents.
Kim Jong Un the Hedgehog jumped out of the way and hit the husband and wife across the face with a 2-kick combo, causing them to fly back before crashing through a wall.
Kim Jong Un then said "I sure hope Hell enjoys a nice order of Baby Black Ribs"
Mussolini the Echidna then did yet another rimshot on his drums.
The Age of Consent just said "I WILL AVENGE MY NAKAMAS YOU BAKAS!" before rushing Mussolini with a flurry of attacks, or at least, that was the plan.
Instead Mussolini just pulled out an LSD pill and flung it in her mouth with utmost precision and timing, causing Chris Hansen's wife to begin hallucinating vividly.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! I CAN'T STAND PLAYING SOCCER WITH ICE CUBE! ITS MY WORST NIGHTMARE!" said the Age of Consent before falling unconscious.
Michael Jordan just said "good lord, this fic has more racist jokes than the Rush Hour movies."
Michael Jordan then pulled out his basketball and flung it at Mussolini, but the Echidna just batted the ball away with his drumsticks before jumping at the basketball player and clonking him on the head with one of his drum cymbals.
A cartoonishly large bump formed on Michael Jordan's head as he said "ya know, I dun think Space Jam 2 is dat bad a movay" before falling unconscious.
Meanwhile, Bobobo was continuing to wail on Genghis Khan the hedgehog with a flat screen TV while yelling stuff about pudding.
"PUDDING PUDDING PUDDING PUDDING" before stopping and saying "wait, what was I talking about again?"
Bobobo then looked over at Busta Rhymes and said "oh yeah."
Bobobo then helped Genghis Khan the hedgehog up and said "I was busy congratulating you for helping me defeat my most hated adversary, Tupac."
Genghis Khan just said "I thought you liked him."
Bobobo shook his head and said "no, I absolutely despise him. I'll never forgive him for sending my family into the black hole of quadrant 9."
Genghis Khan the Hedgehog then said "uhhhhhhhhh, ok?"
Bobobo then said "let's go and spit on his dead body, okay new friend?"
Genghis Khan just said "sure, I guess"
Bobobo then happily skipped with his new friend, while Genghis Khan just accepted that he was friends with Bobobo now.
The two of them then got to Busta Rhymes body and Bobobo said "alright, let's spit in 3, 2, 1-"
But as Genghis Khan the hedgehog was about to spit on Busta Rhymes body, Bobobo yelled "TUPAC NOW!" and suddenly, the famous rapper Tupac burst out of Busta Rhymes chest like a certain iconic movie monster.
"BITCH WHAT THE FUCK!?" yelled Genghis Khan
Tupac then knocked Genghis Khan out in one punch before saying "thanks for not letting anyone know I didn't really die."
Bobobo just said "don't mention it man."
The two of them fistbumped, before Tupac got inside Lightning McQueen and drove off.
Back to Mussolini the Echidna, who was karate chopping our heroes like tiny infants.
Hamburglar and Gumby tried doing a team attack on the dictator of Japan, but the Echidna did a flip through the air and kicked both the Hamburglar and Gumby directly in the face, sending them flying across the battlefield and into a conveniently placed set of trash cans.
Mussolini then said "ching chong ching ching chong chong."
Martin Luther King then said "I thought you were supposed to be Japanese, not Chinese."
Mussolini stopped in his tracks before saying "uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, anime and samurai movies?"
The Green M&M then flipped through the air and clonked Mussolini on the head with a McDonalds Mcflurry, causing Mussolini the Echidna to be sent to the afterlife immediately.
Martin then fistbumped his wife and said "great job honey."
The Green M&M said "thanks, I learned the McFlurry technique from my sensei, Billy Mays"
The two laughed before running to go confront Kim Jong Un the Hedgehog.
….
Kim Jong Un stood tall and proud as the other heroes confronted him, aside from Mr Teacherman and the Teletubbies who were now reading Lego Magazine.
"You've been beaten Kim" said Martin Luther King
Kim Jong Un began laughing before saying "do you not think I didn't plan for this? When Mussolini and Genghis Khan die, their power is directly transferred over to me. Now you will face me when I have the powers of a god!"
Kim Jong Un's body then began to change shape. His normally light green color scheme started to take on a much darker tone, almost like the colors of a forest. His muscles then began to quadruple in size, leaving Kim so huge that most professional wrestlers would be ashamed of his physique. His teeth then morphed into vicious looking fangs straight out of Bram Stoker's Dracula, and finally, the quills on his back morphed into sharp spikes which gave off the vibe that a single touch would tear your skin off. It was truly a sight to behold.
The world shuddered in fear as Omega Kim Jong Un had finally arrived.
Omega Kim Jong Un said "now prepare to face the ultimate power" before rushing our heroes, yelling out his banshee like war cry. But before anyone could do anything, the author suddenly got really bored of writing, so Kim Jong Un the Hedgehog died of a heart attack right there.
As Kim's dead body fell to the ground, the heroes looked around at each other until the Hamburglar just said "well that was pointless."
The door to Kevin Smith's castle then opened up and our heroes went inside to confront the villain, Kevin Smith.