The castle door swung open as our heroes entered Kevin Smith's foreboding castle, each step creating an echo in the dark and reflective hallway of the madman's throne room.

As the Justice League entered Kevin Smith's castle, Busta Rhymes yelled out "YO NIGGA, WHERE'S MY HELLO KITTY COLLECTION!?"

His words echoed across the hallway, telling our heroes that this place was much larger than it looked. About large enough for a superpowered fight to happen and not have any readers ask questions as to how all this shit can fit in there at once.

As if Busta Rhymes question was being answered, bright white lights suddenly turned on and illuminated the entire room, revealing Kevin Smith casually sitting in his throne room chair with the biggest shit eating grin on his face.

"So, it seems like you managed to get past my hedgehog guards"

Busta Rhymes didn't say anything, he just hopped on a giant burrito and began surfing towards Kevin Smith with the intent to punch him in his stupid face.

Suddenly, the rapper found himself being lifted into the sky by Kevin Smith's psychic powers, before the filmmaker casually tossed him away, sending him flying across the room.

Kevin Smith casually wagged his finger and said "not yet my pretties, first you're going to defeat my guards. Then, maybe if I'm feeling merciful, I'll grant you the right to fight me."

Kevin Smith then snapped his fingers, and an army of 100 Jerry Seinfelds appeared out of thin air.

The Age of Consent responded to that with "You can't do that Kevin Smith-Chan! BAKA BAKA BAKA!"

The Age of Consent then found teeth leaving her mouth as she was punched in the face by Jerry Seinfeld. Her mouth bled a stream of pineapple flavored Fanta.

Bobobo jumped to the Age of Consent's rescue and bashed the Jerry over the head with a bag of Flamin Hot Cheetos, shattering his skull like a watermelon.

"That's what George Washington would've wanted" said Bobobo.

Bobobo's afro then opened up to reveal George Washington in a samurai kimono, fighting zombies with a lightsaber.

"The enemy of my enemy is my nigga" said George Washington.

George Washington then pulled out a large hamburger and threw it at a group of Jerry Seinfelds. The burger hit them dead on, causing them to explode in a fiery burst of Pinkie Pies.

Another Jerry Seinfeld tried burning Bobobo with a flamethrower, but was stopped when the Age of Consent sprung back up and chopped his head off with a foam sword that she probably bought at Target.

As blood sprayed from Jerry's neck stump, the Age of Consent said "your timeslot has been cut short."

On the other side of the room, Michael Jordan was dribbling a severed Jerry Seinfeld head and said "now let's do some drills" before jumping into the air and tossing the severed head into a crowd of Jerry Seinfelds.

Due to Michael's basketball energy flowing through the Jerry Seinfeld head, the head went off with the force of an atom bomb and took 50 Jerry Seinfelds with it.

Martin Luther King flashed his friend a thumbs up before taking his wife's hand and unleashing an ultimate finishing move.

The McFlurry Massacre.

A stream of pure white M&M McFlurry fired out of both warriors palms and struck the remaining Jerries head-on. The M&Ms embedded themselves into the Jerries bodies and blood flowed out of their corpses like hot fudge.

Martin and the Green M&M highfived each other before turning to face Kevin Smith in all his evil.

Kevin Smith got out of his throne and said "well, seems like you've beaten my Jerry Seinfeld empire. I guess you've earned the right to fight me."

Kevin Smith then whipped out a rubber ducky and flung it at Martin, bonking the man with a dream on the snout.

Kevin Smith then ran up to the Justice league said "now, face my bomb!"

Kevin then pulled out a copy of the movie, Cop Out, and threw it at the Green M&M. The DVD exploded the second it made contact with her face as she flew backwards and landed next to Busta Rhymes body.

Michael Jordan whipped out his universe destroying basketball and flung it at Kevin Smith, but Kevin just caught it with one hand before saying "nice trick, but get a load of this!"

Kevin then dropped his pants and stuck his penis into the ball. The filmmaker then took a deep breath as his penis retracted into him before exhaling, causing the ball to shoot directly at Michael Jordan and hit the basketball player in the stomach.

"DON'T FUCK WITH THIS FILMMAKER" declared Kevin Smith as Michael Jordan flew across the room with a basketball shaped bruise in his stomach.

Kevin Smith then began waving his penis around like a lightsaber and said "anyone else want a go?"

The other members were about to jump Kevin Smith all at once, but Kevin Smith pulled out a box of Reeses Puffs and said "that was a rhetorical question" before spraying Reeses Puffs onto everyone.

Since Reeses Puffs are the seeds of demons, literally everyone got knocked out, aside from the Age of Consent because she has the power of anime on her side.

Kevin Smith saw that she was still standing and said "you're quite the interesting one. Would you like to continue fighting me?"

The Age of Consent gripped her foam sword and said "gladly, kusuo-head."

The penis clashed against the foam sword with a furious *CLANG* as the Age of Consent swung her sword like an expert, while Kevin Smith swung his penis with all the grace and elegance of a professional fencer.

"Your penis is no match for my blade" said the Age of Consent.

"Bold words" said Kevin Smith.

Kevin then swung his penis at the Age of Consent's head, to which she blocked his schlong with all the ferocity of an ancient samurai.

The Age of Consent then ducked underneath the penis and made a small slice into the side of Kevin Smith, causing him to bleed yellow mustard.

"Ooph" said Kevin Smith

"I learned that move from Inuyasha" said The Age of Consent.

"You fight well, but let's see how you manage this!" said Kevin Smith before unscrewing the head of his penis and pulling a baguette out of his dick.

Kevin Smith now wielded his penis in one hand and a baguette in the other.

The filmmaker then screwed his penis head back on and said "how do you like me now?"

The Age of Consent didn't flinch. She held her sword steady before continuing to clash blades against Kevin Smith and all his evil.

Kevin Smith's speed with his weapons was difficult to counter. It was as if he was wielding a dozen blades at once, and the Age of Consent was just barely able to fend off all his attacks.

Soon, the Age of Consent's defenses were beginning to wear down, as Kevin nicked her in the side with his penis, causing her to bleed Pocky Sticks.

"HNNGGG-baka" grunted the Age of Consent.

Suddenly, the Age of Consent felt a rage well up inside her, and she pulled out a second blade to counter Kevin's, a Kirito body pillow!

Now, Age of Consent was wielding her weapons at lightspeed and this time it was Kevin Smith's turn to be wary as her attacks managed to counter his, blow for blow.

Soon, Kevin Smith found himself shrieking as repeated hits to his penis eventually caused it to shatter into a million pieces!

Kevin Smith was now down on his knees as the Age of Consent lifted her dakimakura up into the air and said "your penis is no match for my daki."

But before the Age of Consent could land the final strike, she suddenly found a bloody dildo entering her backside and exiting through her chest.

Kevin Smith smiled as the Age of Consent fell to her knees and began bleeding Evangelion DVDs.

Age of Consent's horror grew as the one who stabbed her came into full view before giving Kevin Smith a high-five.

The man standing before her, was Mr. Teacherman!

"Wut da fuk?" said the Age of Consent before passing out.