The sun left his imprint on a faded vending machine, its decal shimmering in the orange waves. The unit had to be shaken and kicked, shaken and kicked again, until a blue aluminum can dropped through the delivery chute. The metal lid was cut open by a claw tip as she looked at the far-off sunset riding into the horizon line, a singular tree shadow piercing the dark red sphere.

‟… It's gonna get too hot for him to fall asleep soon."

Flakes of sunlight fell over the cusp of the window, condensing and trickling into the Holidays' drawing room. Trailing over dark red planks, expensive green carpets and white-leather couches. The tip of sun slowly flowing towards two loving teenagers, in their perfect relationship, who were spending their free Saturday immersed by digital gamer goodness (and dust bunnies). Mana Blazers, the new spammy RPG he'd seen in the magazine and bought with his own money was blown up on her movie TV. Their adventure was advancing in slow, twinkling pixelated co-op.

Nothing good lasted forever, not even glorious gamer heaven. Not long after they started, the blond doe put her controller down, stretched her back and lifted her tiny tail.

‟What?" - He turned on his back to ask.

‟That's enough for now, I said!"

‟… Really?"

‟We can't spend the whole day just playing video games, you know? If I don't get anything done today I can't sleep right!" - She said, playing with her braided ponytail.

‟You could start by getting anything done in-game." - The honor student demanded that they grind up and get the best possible gear before advancing every single time. It had been 90 minutes at the starting village, and nobody had even burned it down yet.

‟Oh, we can play a bit later! Let's take a break and do something!"

He groaned internally. He thought he'd done more than enough.

‟You have any ideas?"

‟Oh, I'm glad you asked! I have plenty!" - The long list of chores and projects he could gleam through her eyes, like an unbroken flowing receipt, ‟How about I unclog and clean the upstairs bathroom? In the meanwhile you can mow the lawn!I can do some other things while you're out there, just do your best not to die!" - She finished mockingly. The only person he's seen excited(?) about cleaning.

‟Can't you just get a maid? You have the money, don't you?"

‟I'm not lazy Kris, I actually clean the space I live in! Come on, up!"

I clean my room too genius, resonated painfully through his thoughts, like the grumpy teenager had just hit a nerve on a table; except the table was her. Her attitude blew a cold fire up his collar, like he'd drank a shot of ice-cold ethanol, his chest felt icy. He didn't know why.

But, wanting no trouble, he settled on the safe, ‟fine, we'll take a break."

Finding out the lawnmower's whereabouts, he whirred it up, marveling at the immense power of the sharp spinning blades. He felt the midday scorch as he started on his merry way around the Holiday estate. It was a bright long green path dotted white with small flowers, ornamented with mounds and gatherings of fir-needle piles and cones buried within. Sun pouring over him like melted gold on his back, only sharp thin shadows which were granted by the firs. With hills and inlets and coombs, knolls mounts ridges bumps and bluffs, along a few others more for him to navigate his machinery over. What he was doing didn't require a deft hand or a tough grip to carry out, it was just walking from here to there. Except he in his ripped shirt had no idea where here started and there was ending, the yard was huge and unfenced.

Wiping his brow and going back for a refill, the smell of chemicals blasted his face. Good to know the deer in charge was working hard upstairs. She debatably gave herself a harder job, having to constantly kneel and crouch while scrubbing every nook and cranny of that roomy bath, and then polish the mirror.

His girlfriend had not and would not ask him to do something she wouldn't do, it was always 'I will, and you could too Krissy' in a manner that he'd found impossible to refuse. And she was more fastidious than anyone he'd ever known, of course that meant him included. Day to day Noelle kept herself a very busy doe, and she had grown to dual-wield plans most working hours of the week. The poor human boy had no room to complain about her, any feelings of inadequacy or resentment or stress had to be hid, since obviously she was amazing and he had no place to speak.

But his emotions, much as he wished he could make them melt into trills, trickles and streams unfelt, a greater part of himself couldn't be convinced by explanations. He had a growing pit in his stomach and a burden weighing on his brow. Kris was feeling tired in more than just the physical sense. He barely had time with his girlfriend, seemingly less for himself, and he felt gaunt and out of energy every waking moment of his days. The time they spent together wasn't making him ready to go out and give it his all, and of course that wasn't her obligation to do. But he'd look over and her thoughts were about something else. Noelle was smart about worldly things, like butter-bells and finance deposits and getting Christmas cards out on time, so he'd think to himself that she was wise to be thinking about what she was. It was for some good later, he'd tell himself. But still it left him lonely, he felt abandoned. And he did, sometimes, wonder why he'd even try to hang out with her so much. It was amazing, then it was boring, then it was infuriating, then it was painful.

He felt guilty for saying that, again he felt blessed for it, he wasn't so dumb that he was blind. All the cards were stacked in his favor, unbelievably good a hand he'd been dealt, and still he found a way to try and fold and moan about it. He did not deserve his amazing girlfriend, he who could have given a goat's ass what he was going to do with his life just less than a year ago, he who never even tried enough to receive participation medals, he who shambled the streets and stuck to his room without so much as a sign of life for going a decade. Kris Dreemurr didn't really deserve anyone, it's a wonder he still hadn't been abandoned again.

He should've been thankful, he would tell himself again and again. He reconnected with then fell in love with his childhood friend and she was way out of his league. So he had to do his best and play catchup, to make sure he was on equal footing to her before reality would equal out and he lost her.

But no matter how he'd repackage that truth to himself it didn't ease the fatigue his heart felt.

After getting everything done, our Kris fell face-first into the couch. Then a brown-furred girl told him off for getting sweat on it. So he rolled onto the even more expensive carpet.

Hordes more chores vanished, him having taken a shower in the hell of chemicals that was bathroom (she'd decorated the shower head with christmas decorations and he got stuck in them), they were back to playing Blazers. Except he was struggling not to doze off, as the flare of the sun had caught up and was sniping his exact position on the couch. Noelle seemed to get really into video games, even though she kept saying they're for kids when she's not playing them.

He took his opportunity before she could ask again for more things to be done around the house. Any minute now she'd realize the fridge was empty.

‟So," - He raised his voice, fingers tap-dancing on the off-brand controller, ‟remember the dates I talked about three weeks ago?"

‟W-Wait, you mean now you want to go now?!"

‟I wish." - He faked a chuckle, the human wasn't in the mood for it at all, he'd really wished to be home alone ‟Next week, dummy."

‟Oh! Where to?"

‟Dunno, the pool? Maybe the ice rink… if that's still open. Or maybe dinner."

‟Well, I'm glad to see you're excited! I don't really… mind either way."

He had to decide again. Of course.

Of course he had to. Of course of course.

‟Then we can walk and have some fun by the pool. Only your top half will be fried."

His valedictorian partner didn't turn to look at him, eyes wide open towards the LED screen. Only after her character turned into a ghost did she open her mouth.

‟I'm glad you're inviting me out Kris, but… I want to spend some time next Saturday, by myself."

‟… With?"

‟Reading, writing up reports, reorganizing the attic, getting to use the laptop myself a bit. Stuff like that. Thinking about it, I haven't talked with Catti or Jockington since school ended!"

‟Oh."

Well, the teenager should have been happy. He wanted free time as well, so that arrangement should have been a win-win. Except it was a loss for the sallow human, since getting the Saturday free meant more work for him. But that was not why he felt a dark draught swill in his stomach. A shiver sent goosebumps over his bones and trembling through his cartilage. A drop of ire. Kris was very good at bottling things up, some things much better than others. Anger the best.

‟You know, you could take some days off work, right?"

His hoofed classmate was never required that busy of a work schedule. In actuality Carol had discouraged her own daughter from it, saying how a girl her age should appreciate more time to enjoy herself. But the little champion she was, the youngest Holiday said that if her mom was working that much then she should have been too. The brave worker she was!

‟Oh, c'mon, Krismass! We've been inundated with work lately! The summer festival's just getting pushed further and further back from the heat, and in the meanwhile everything's falling apart! Pipes are bursting, roads are cracking, the clinic is at capacity, monsters are even catching fire! It's pandemonium! I gotta help!"

‟Right. Right."

‟Oh, don't be mad! We'll still have enough time together." - She looked at him all cute-like and leaned her lithe scruffy shoulder on his. Only after she realized she needed to. Her arm felt bony.

‟I'm not even mad."

Like a wind blown in from empty space or a statue of hollow ice, the girl next to Kris seemed frigid and uncaring. Something performing a poor imitation of a girlfriend, she didn't even get the hair Noelle wore right. He didn't care to stick around and take it anymore. Why should he? She was gross. He was her pet and errand boy, there to help her keep on schedule and look cute otherwise.

‟…"

This is stupid. Kris would say to the Soul, were the Soul here to make mistakes like those. But now the boy was alone with his thoughts, and any unwise rinds that peeled off his brain were his own patented-brand of stupidity. Kris wasn't dumb, just dumb with people. But Kris was also smart enough to know that feelings, especially the immature and explosive, were temporary. He'd put them aside and stop being a baby, and be a good boyfriend. Noelle was going through a lot and she needed that. Same boy genius just thought of a good way to do so.

‟Hey, Noey. Wanna go jogging?"

‟Now?!" - She turned to look at him, ‟I-I'd die, numbnuts!"

‟Not now, ding-a-ling. In the morning before it gets hot. Well, you'd get hot though."

‟… W-Wait, really? Really? You want to go jogging? With me?"

‟I just asked you, so duh. Hometown is nice enough, we got a park next to dad's store. And it'd help you with losing weight."

‟Oh Kris, I'd be glad to!"

‟So you're in?"

‟I'm in! Except, I don't know if youcould wake up with me. Every time we see each other you you're so tired. A-are you sure you're sleeping right, appleslice? You're not playing video games all night, are you?"

‟It's… it's my job, Noelle." - He said dumbfounded. He worked late evenings.

‟You're that tired from your part-time job, seriously? Are you really sure you're not just being lazy again, Kris?"

He stared at the woman next to him, eyes glassed over. He couldn't believe it. Like usual, she didn't even look to say it to his face. He was done, he got up without another word.

‟Don't use the upstairs bathroom just yet Krismass— Kris?" - She looked over the couch to look at him.

‟Krismass!" - He heard one last call as he closed the door behind him. Despite his instincts, he closed it gently.

‟…"

‟…D— D- Did I-… I-Is he angry?" - The doe asked alone, tail raised and nails over her mouth. ‟Oh gosh. Oh gosh. Did I do something bad— I didn't mean to— Oh my gosh what do I do"

The sun was looming through far off tree tops, framing the road in its colors, everything was draped in glistening opals and melted gold, long dark capes stretching from their tips to their bases. And there were a lot of capes fluttering about that evening, for good reason. It was Summer break, it was Saturday, he was in the park.

The trees he was passing hands in fingers were overfull with oily leaves, the heat hadn't bothered them much. Every sinuous branch was drooping from the weight of bloom. So much love they'd been receiving that it was too much to hold on to, maybe they'd snap off all that green they'd worked so hard for.

Talks and walks of all manner were out and about, going in and out of earshot, up and down the walkways, having a merry-busy evening. But not him, he just wanted to get away from everything and disappear. Be alone and remain unnoticed and be gone, for just a bit of time.

Little Kris was angry. And little Kris wasn't allowed to be angry. It was scary when him and boys like him got angry, because they were a very very bad sort. And when their sort got angry, they turned to very very bad people, and those very very bad people do very very bad things. Things that can't be undone, things that can't be forgiven, things that won't be forgot.

And little Kris, as much as he wished, prayed and hoped, begged and pleaded otherwise, was one of the same. Same blood that did all the bad in the world and same hands capable of death without motive. Kris was a human, if anyone was still confusing him for the literal black sheep of the Dreemurr's.

To not do anything bad, little Kris just had to never be angry.

And Noelle Holiday, she was a wonderful girl that he loved. And that wonderful love made his heart melt and his doubts float away. But just because they were floating out of mind didn't mean that they didn't return, or that they weren't going back bigger, because disappear they did not. The weight had held him down. He felt like she didn't care about him. She wanted too much from him and never appreciated the effort he made. She was too busy with herself and couldn't properly relax anymore. There. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe he'd solve it if he had the balls to say something. Maybe he was even worse than her. Maybe he'd get it when he's older or wiser, or sober from anger. But that was how he felt. It's pathetic how many asterisks he needed to give himself just to get it out.

It didn't matter anyway, he'll be the one who would to suck it up and apologize for it anyway. She'll just keep being herself and he'll keep like this. All he cared now is being alone where he's safe to vent.

He was careful to not nudge a single monster, even bumping shoulders would knock them most flat. Even worse was if they were to feel what was clinging his right upper thigh, the leather holster hiding a steel knife right underneath his pants. It was a stupid thing to carry, he knew. Probably illegal if it were found. But it mattered to him to keep it exactly for times like these. Kris was a human, he was dangerous to everyone there, but that knife was dangerous to him.

At first, it was to protect any other monsters from humans. He hates them, thanks to what they've done. He was a dumb little kid and it was still fresh in his mind, so he convinced himself he was a weird-looking monster and he needed something since he was so small and weak alone. He would always sneak in kitchen knives. That changed the night when reality hit him and he couldn't ignore how,he was one of the same humans he had wanted to protect everyone from. He didn't stop though, he just carried his knife with a different purpose.

It was there for him. A single lapse of judgment meant he'd do something he'd regret for the rest of his days, that's simply how easy it was to snuff a monster's life out, all his life he'd learned to treat them like Styrofoam and reject his nature as a human. All touches were light caresses, all holds are loose, all hits are off-limits. He'd learned that piano keys were the hardest things his fingers should be pressing. He did know his true strength, for there were still things he was powerless against, but those weren't anyone around him. It was nice to get weighed down by a reminder of what would happen if he touches a monster in that way. But if anyone else ever came he was also ready.

Off the beaten path, onto the dark-orange kindling grass, over a rill and a mound was an old soda machine, bent with age (and Susie's beatings). He put a dollar into it then hit it into working. It had no glass cover so he'd just have to punish the thing until it gave him his dues. He could tell it was probably the last can he'd get out of it without flipping it over and breaking it open. Then, next to it and over a few snags and a nest of ants. Technically outside the park and overlooking it, over a tangly path was a place he'd not been to in so long.

The hill, with a singular lone tree on it. And an old friend with her scruffy head of hair resting on the redwood's base and her butt between its flared roots.

He didn't say a word as he walked up and sat down. Being angry at the world with someone else. This little hill of theirs was angled backwards from everything else, overlooking Hometown with their backs to the sun, high enough to see the shoulders of mountains into the pale dark mist. Blue hadows took over their faces as they looked away from the red sun on a world of cold silver stars. And a moon that was blinking pearls and white-gold silver onto the light rippling dark pond.

‟Hey." - He said, since it only felt fair to acknowledge it and talk. Though he didn't get an answer.

He was happy to see her still being herself. Same hair-do, hoodie and can of teeth-melting dark soda in hand. That was enough for the soon-to-move-out boy. And since she was here, she was dealing with her own problems, so maybe he shouldn't have been that glad to see her. They each rested in their own half corner of the tree, enough space to forget the other was even there.

He listened in under the windless night, quiet and wyrm-like, ‟…Hey."

‟…Been a while."

She didn't respond. But she didn't leave or pointedly ignore him. Which was more than she'd done in months.

‟… Sorry I haven't talked. I thought you wanted some space."

He was met with even more silence, but since his purple friend seemed to be content with just staying with him, if only out of powerlessness or impotency to leave, since she was still there he thought it fine to talk to her like old times' sake.

‟…You know, I'm feeling like shit right now."

He heard her hum longingly back, curt but empathetic.

It was the most productive chat he's had in months.

‟I think I screwed up today." - He continued, hands over his knees. ‟But I don't care at this point. I'm trying hard, I think as hard as I can." - He looked at the stars.

‟But the harder I try the more I end up spinning my wheels. Then I look like an idiot. And feel like one too."

‟…You too?"

He and Susie, their time not talking was almost longer than they were friends for. So really, they were acquaintances, and not even that. And yet through the silence that fell after she said that they'd shared more than a month's worth of catching-up. Them and the Summer stars, titanium blue and midnight white, wheeling overhead like neon reticles. And they two on some random hill, when everyone else was enjoying their weekend.

‟Yeah. Feels like you're kicked in the nuts. You get asked the world then get shot down for trying."

‟…Then—" She got more excited as she spoke, ‟you wanna punch 'em back, right?"

‟God no. I love her way too much."

He felt his old companion deflate completely as she sipped on her soda, out of everything he could have brought up.

‟Sorry" - He said.

‟Had a fight with her?"

‟We'll get over it, I think I'm just immature."

He was an adult, he'd have his fit then he'd have no choice but to get back to life. Guess what, Kris, you have work tomorrow!

‟…Hey Kris, can I tell you something?"

‟Anything."

‟… Nothing. Sorry." - He felt her speak with her jaw clenched like her vocal chords were pulling her fangs back in her throat.

‟Well then." - He was getting up, ‟Susie, you do you. I'm just happy I got to see you again." - Before we leave, he wanted to say. But the words vanished in the back of his throat.

‟… Kris, give me some more time." - That was weird. Every syllable was pained and haggard, she sounded like she was arguing with someone in there.

‟I'll give you as much as I can. I'll be going now… And Susie, move your head a bit."

She was a fucking idiot.

Susie, light purple dinosaur/dragon, Hometown resident, 18 years of age, and a fucking idiot.

Kris's pink reflection was berating her, she was berating herself louder. That was a golden opportunity for her to say something. Anything! He literally was having relationship troubles, god damn it! If she ever wanted to actually have a chance she should have at least planted the idea in his head or something!… And she'd never seen Kris like that before. Not sad or sulking, but hurt and resentful. Kris was angry, or what you are right before you're angry.

Obviously he was different from her old memories, it wasn't even the same boy she knew at this point. He had things to do now. Kris had moved on.

Suddenly, her thoughts got stomped on as she heard him take three steps back and stay silent, arms free at his sides. The next moment she knew, she was hearing him grunt through clenched teeth as he gives the tree the harshest kick she's seen in her life. Trying to topple the giant thing over. A single time he did it, but the force and ferocity through was more than enough. His dress shoe completely destroyed in the process, with pieces flying rolling down every direction. She didn't hear him say a word before or after he did it, just a simple see you later as he limped down the hill with a single working leg.

Good to see there were two idiots on that hill, because that tree did not budge.