Chapter 130: Dilemma After Dilemma
Having agreed to let Rem stay in the Cathedral as a neutral holding area for her at the extension of the deal between himself and Garfiel, YN had been the one to take the oni there. But he didn't go there alone.
As Subaru and Garfiel went to go about changing over the Command Authority to him, the main acting Ryuzu had asked for Pico, the clone that had seemingly taken an acute interest in YN since he gained the Authority, to keep an eye on him and make sure he delivered Rem to the agreed upon location.
Yet, as he traveled with Rem in his arms to the Cathedral, Pico's entire mute attention was taken away from him, and was now totally engrossed upon the blue-haired girl in his arms. While she remained completely silent and emotionless, YN could definitely see a small twinkle in her eyes as she gazed upon the Sleeping Beauty.
Finding a vacant bed for her to rest in at the Cathedral, YN laid his precious maid down, and gently kissed her forehead. As he went to leave though, knowing time was of importance, Pico remained.
Still in her small trance, the short elf with bubblegum-pink hair stared at Rem without so much a pinch of emotion to her. For a few moments, YN watched the silent spectacle. While no words were said, after a short while, Pico looked back at him, and then returned her stare to Rem, almost as if silently asking if this was the one he had spoken about to Ryuzu.
Reapproaching Rem, YN too stared at her, a longing in his heart growing as he did so.
Rem...
But, as much as he wanted to stay here with her, YN knew things were in motion in the Sanctuary, and he had to go be present for them.
Seeing Pico continue to stare at Rem though, with that twinkle in her cerulean eyes, YN wanted to help her too.
YN: You like her too, don't you? You can tell she's kind and nice.
Without a nod or any other indication, Pico only blinked a few times, looked up to YN, and looked back to Rem in response.
Feeling that this was Pico's own limited language for "yes," YN felt the odd desire to reward the small elf for understanding just how precious Rem was. Reaching his hand to the maid's soft blue hair, YN removed the signature pink hair clip from her bangs. Dropping down to one knee, better matching Pico's height, YN gently placed the "X" shaped clip into her own bangs.
YN: There... I get the feeling you don't want to leave Rem's side as much as I don't want to, so why don't you hold onto this until everything is clear and we can come back together, okay?
Again with no sort of acknowledgment, not even a nod, Pico blankly stared at YN for a moment before turning to exit the small bedroom they had found for Rem. Seemingly agreeing with YN, the two departed to meet back up with Subaru and Garfiel.
There's no clue what's going to happen next, but knowing it involves Roswaal does worry me...
Those worries though were slightly mellowed seeing Pico turn around at the exit of the Cathedral. While she still professed no inkling of emotion, just seeing the familiar pink hair clip from the woman he loved be put to use did stir up good thoughts in YN.
At the very least I guess, if not from just her behavior alone, Rem's hair clip on Pico will help me distinguish her from the rest of the Ryuzu copies.
As YN could only stare on in disbelief at the pink hair-clip on the floor, now burnt black, a horrifying realization washed over him as a deep guilt wounded his soul.
Utterly mortified, YN's life hadn't been saved by just whatever random Ryuzu copy that had been closest.
No.
YN had been saved by Pico.
The single clone he had felt a genuine attachment to, from the hours she had spent clung to his arm, to the small moment of understanding she had shown him when looking at Rem, was now gone, —vaporized by the flames she had saved YN from.
Completely oblivious to the world around him, YN's shaky breath exited his mouth as tears welled up in his eyes.
YN: P-Pico... why? Why?! I... I didn't order you to—!
Subaru: —Get him out of here!
Slowly reaching for the burnt hair clip, YN suddenly felt himself grabbed as Subaru yelled out. Picked up and hoisted above their heads just before YN could reach the clip, several Ryuzu copies were now shuttling YN out of the small shack.
YN: W-Wait—!
Wanting nothing but the small, once-pink clip, the room was quickly engulfed in flames.
Shutting his eyes from the heat he felt, YN felt one the carriers under him succumb to the flames, but was nonetheless kept a hold of by the remaining clones.
Now outside in the deep snow, the clones could carry YN no further. But as he righted himself, all he could see was the once run down shack was now showered in flames twice its original height as the cold snow melted away from its structure.
Speechless to this display, a moment later, another body was ejected from the structure. Landing, his black tracksuit contrasting against the white snow let YN know immediately who this was.
YN: Subaru!
Picking himself up, YN fumbled over the several Ryuzu copies under him as he then tripped into the snowbank between him and Subaru. The wintery-weather had dramatically picked up while they had confronted Roswaal indoors, and had gone from being knee deep to up to YN's belt line.
YN: Subaru!
YN knew Subaru wasn't dead simply from the fact a Return hadn't been triggered, but still, in this snow, making an escape wasn't going to be easy. Reaching him finally, he pulled Subaru out of the snowbank to get him on his feet, and as he did, a figure emerged from the burning structure, the only source of light in this snow-struck hellscape.
Roswaal: Whyyyyyyyy won't you turn back time? Is there a reason you won't rewind?
As Roswaal stepped off the porch of the burning shack, it collapsed behind him, the flames stealing what little strength the timbers of the structure had to support itself with as they towered high into the night sky.
With both YN and Subaru looking on as the magician's darkened silhouette approached out of the light behind him, neither knew what to expect now.
Am I really going to have to fight Roswaal right here and now?
Still, even as they questioned what came next, Roswaal continued to question the present.
Roswaal: Maybe the reason you do not is because you already have? Which begs the question, what happens to your memory when you do, I wonder? Or my memory. Surely our dear YN-kun might know? Tell me, can Subaru-kun decide who does and who doesn't keep their memories? Or do you simply truuuuuust him to tell you he's rewound things? It must make a rather fickle relationship between the two of you, does it not?
YN: — — —
Silent in response to Roswaal's curiosities, this only garnered the idea in him that YN knew much more than that.
Roawaal: It seems you may carry memories not unlike Subaru-kun does when a rewind does occur... I wonder then, how persuasive will I need to get with you before he decides to rewind things?
Underhandedly announcing his intentions to force Subaru into this "rewind" by any means, Subaru realized this included torturing YN.
Fearful of just how far Roswaal might push the groundskeeper for answers, Subaru ordered the Ryuzu clones into action.
Subaru: Get him away from here! Take him to safety!
Without even a second to protest, YN was once more swept up from under himself by half a dozen pink-haired elves, seemingly crawling out from under the snowbank they were in.
Being carried off now, YN hated abandoning Subaru, but knew the strategy called for that now. Yet, in the presence of such a powerful mage, it wasn't like he was about to let that happen.
Roswaal: Goa.
From just his fingertip, a fireball was cast. Whipping by at the speed of sound almost, the small orb of fire narrowly missed YN and his entourage of elves as it crashed into the forest behind them.
*FWOOOSH*
While the spell had been small in size, its effect was not. Instantly the forest behind them was ablaze in red and yellow. A forest fire had been started, and it quickly went on to encompass the entire surrounding area, leaving no real escape route.
Left speechless at this, while snapping and popping of sap filled tree trunks and underbrush going up in flames filled the air, another distinct sound was audible.
Hisses and squeaks could be heard, and it wasn't before long that the origin of these sounds made themselves apparent.
Leaping out from the forest, small balls of fire squirmed and squeaked about in pain before keeling over, motionless on the snow covered ground. As one came flying directly at YN, it too narrowly missed him as it landed at his feet, dead in just a few seconds as the flame on it went out.
Before him was the half-burnt remains of a white hare.
As one also jumped out near Subaru, the large snowbank he was still in extinguished the fire on its white fur, and even though it must have been gravely wounded, rather than rest or lick itself, the small rodent instead lunged right for Subaru.
Subaru: A-A-Ahhhh!
Latching onto his tracksuit jacket, Subaru opted to rip the garment from his body to separate himself from the hare as fast as he could. There was no question to YN the identity of these small beasts now.
The Great Hare had cometh.
Flinging his wadded up jacket away, it landed with the hare still entangled in it where the snow was compacted. Wasting no time, the half-dozen troop of Ryuzu clones dropped YN and moved to finish off the danger.
Just as the small hare emerged from the burnt jacket, having eaten its way out, it split into two and was thankfully kept at a single mitosis before it was killed.
Mercilessly, and with zero emotion, the six Ryuzu clones stomped the white rodent to death, overwhelming it before it could multiply any further.
Upon its death, the ring of fire that was the wall that kept both YN and Subaru from escaping grew bigger and taller. Despite all that was going on and his new hostility to them, Roswaal was keeping the Great Hare at bay from reaching either of them.
Croaking out words from his throat, dried from the cold air around them, Subaru spoke.
Subaru: N-No... This is wrong... We have another day before they show up... So why..? Why did they show up now?
With his head a lot more level than Subaru's right now, YN recalled the words of the Great Hare's creator.
The Great Hare only shows up when it's snowing like this... And Roswaal is the one causing that with his magic... That and Daphne herself said... That's it—!
Turning to Subaru, YN spoke the answer he sought.
YN: —It's the snow! That's what brings it here!
Subaru: Huh?! What? Wouldn't Daphne have said something that obvious—?!
Roswaal: Heeeeee's correct. Tis the other reason I'm using so much magic to alter the weather. The Great Hare is drawn to large accumulations of mana, yet if they've come to this part of the Sanctuary now, mostly devoid of anyone else, that would mean they've already exhausted any other prey.
Looking keenly at them now as his face, still devoid of the make-up they usually saw him in, exited his own shadowy silhouette, he concluded his point.
Roswaal: —If they've come here, there's no one left in the Sanctuary for them to eat.
Thinking of all the people that could mean, only one person occupied YN's worries.
That means...—!
Snapping his vision to the direction it was from where they were, YN's breathing staggered as he spoke her name.
YN: R-Rem!
Rem remained in the Cathedral YN had placed her in, asleep and defenseless as she had become. As it was only briefly described by Subaru, YN knew how traumatizing the death by the Great Hare had been for him, and to imagine a similar fate befalling that defenseless and vulnerable Sleeping Beauty—
Subaru: —Get him to the Cathedral, now!.
Again feeling himself brought off his feet, the team of Ryuzu's that had stomped one of the potentially uncountable amounts of Great Hares brought YN above their heads and began to cart him off. While Subaru needed YN gone, least Roswaal begin to torture him, his main motivation now was getting him free of this so he could go save Rem. Despite how this Loop was obviously lost, Subaru still sought to do all he could for his friend and the one YN held first in heart.
'—He'd do the same for me!' is what Subaru thought at that very moment.
Being rushed away, the Ryuzus carried YN with a speed greater than he alone could have managed walking through this deep snow. With all their weight more evenly distributed atop the snow now, this enabled the clones to nearly run over the snowbank with YN in their combined grasp.
Reaching the perimeter of the fire ring, the copies dropped YN and immediately began throwing swaths of snow at the fire, managing to clear an ash and mud covered path through the flames. As the small team worked at this, YN could hear Subaru shouting at Roswaal, with the topics of the barrier and saving people being the small snippets of things he could make out.
Finally through the flames, YN began a mad dash to the Cathedral. Running, the Ryuzu clones stayed by his side, obeying his orders ultimately.
Subaru kept the act up until the end. Not like it matters anymore now.
In truth, Subaru and YN had convinced Garfiel of one other surprise in case things went awry when confronting Roswaal; if it came up, or if he was privy to it, they'd make the impression that Subaru was given temporary control of the Command Authority, when in actuality, YN retained it still.
A double fake out against Roswaal was the true ace up their sleeve Subaru had mentioned.
Although, I'm thankful I still have it, I really don't like having to use it this way...
While the Ryuzu copies had been told to take commands from Subaru like he'd told them to take orders from Garfiel to keep the ruse up initially, YN was having to make orders now he knew he'd regret. With the Cathedral in view, two of his six replicants had sacrificed themselves for him.
He'd managed to shoot enough Yang magic from his hands to thwart most of the Great Hares leaping at him, but when one had snuck into his blind spot, a copy would jump to block its trajectory, letting itself return to mana as the prize for its sacrifice.
Out of the forest now though, YN ran up to the Cathedral's doors and not too much to his surprise—
YN: Shit, they barricaded them!
With the villagers more than likely still inside, they had jammed the door.
YN: Hey! Open up! I'm still outside!
With no immediate answer, YN looked to see if maybe there was a window he could climb in through, yet as he did—
*Fizzle*
—Another of the Ryuzu clones succumbed to a stray Great Hare.
YN: Jiwald!
Flashing the white fur ball dead with a ray of heat and light, he knew he had little time to contemplate a way in. Gesturing for the three remaining copies to move out of the way, with one thunderous kick—
*BOOM* *BOOM* *CRASH*
Knocking the two large doors off their hinges, YN granted himself entry into the Cathedral.
?: What are you doing!? Do you want us all to die miserably?!
Immediately being shouted at, YN was accosted by one of the Arlem village men.
YN: I'll help you stand them back up! But please afterwards just take me to—!
Man: —There's no time! Just light it on fire like the rest of the piles!
With two other villagers coming over, one with a vase of oil, the other with a torch, the first doused the door and the things that had been bracing it shut with the oil, while the other tossed the torch onto the pile.
Within half a second, a large, raging fire blocked the entrance.
YN: What the hell are you doing?! Are you trying to burn this place to the ground?!
Giving YN a stone cold look, the village man tossed the torch he too was holding onto a nearby pile of wooden rubble covered in oil as well.
Man: It's better this way... Better than being eaten alive, bite by bite.
Left speechless, YN's eyes opened wide at what his words meant.
No... He can't really mean—?!
Noticing there were two more groups of villagers starting fires by various windows and doors inside the structure, a horrifying realization came to YN, making his throat go dry as a sensation of pure dread washed over him.
The Arlem villagers, already trapped inside the Sanctuary and held as hostages, had come to a decision. They'd rather doom themselves to this terrible fate, setting their shelter on fire, than experience what YN was sure had happened to many of their loved ones by now; becoming victims to the Great Hare and its insatiable hunger.
The villagers would rather go out this way, choosing the lesser of two terrible fates.
Fires were now lit all around him, in almost every corner of the building, and quickly a haze of smoke was lining the area.
YN could only watch as these remaining villagers moved to one of the center rooms of the Cathedral, certainly the area where they had all gathered to wait out their impending doom.
YN: No! You can't do this!
Without an answer to be afforded to him, YN was left alone in the main atrium with the two remaining Ryuzu clones, the area now well on its way to being fully engulfed in flames. His attention snapping to though, he had to rescue the one person he had come to get, —the one person whom he wouldn't let be a victim to these flames, or the Great Hare.
Rushing up to the second floor, YN's navigation of the area was hindered by the black smoke obscuring his vision. While he needed to keep his sleeve over his mouth to breathe, he used his one free arm to wave away the smoke so he could see.
YN: *Cough* *Cough*
The air burned his lungs, and the heat was already making him sweat. He needed to find Rem quickly.
To his benefit though, the villagers hadn't removed the Sleeping Beauty from her bed. Seeing her brilliant hue of azure blue amidst the black smoke, he felt a second wind in him take over.
YN: *Cough* Rem! *Cough*
Scooping the girl up into his arms, YN pulled his shirt collar over his face in a vain attempt at filtering any more smoke.
YN: Ryuzu-clone-sans, please, guide me out!
With their lower height, the two clones remained out of the smoke for the most part, and tugging on him in each direction, the two escorted YN back to the entrance.
Shit, that fire is huge now!
The burning pair of knocked down doors had by now become a column of fire, one YN couldn't hope to cross with Rem and keep her from harm.
Looking all about, the villagers had left no opening point for the Great Hares. Each window and any other exit had an even larger fire set in front of it.
Like the villagers, YN was trapped in this burning building.
Tightly shutting his eyes, he faced a difficult moral quandary, as what it was, he very much did not wish to do.
Exhaling an indecisive breath, one look down at the peacefully asleep oni in his arms gave him the strength to act, fueling his need to protect her.
YN: Clone-sans...
Regretting the order already, the two Ryuzu clones, —the very last ones of their kind, acted without a shred of emotion or protest to their fate.
Smothering themselves on the fire blocking the exit, YN did not let their sacrifice go to waste.
YN: Hup!
Extinguishing the fire just enough to let him make it through with a few labored long steps, YN was free of the burning building.
YN: *Inhale—* *Cough!* *Cough!*
Immediately his body demanded fresh air from the outside, but from just the massive temperature difference alone, it shocked his windpipe. Needing to catch his breath in this cold air, it took several bouts of coughing to finally get a hold of himself as his throat kept getting irritated every time he needed to take a breath.
As he worked to catch his breath though, the guilt of his order sunk in. After having just witnessed Pico die to a fireball for his sake, seeing the last two Ryuzu clones be smothered atop a fire for him to escape only made it all hurt worse.
YN: What a— *Cough* terrible fate.
To be burned to death, or eaten alive by the Great Hare... At least they all return to mana almost instantly... I can't imagine they suffer for long...
Now truly alone with no one but Rem, YN was fortunate the Great Hare had for the most part cleared out of this area.
Turning behind him to see the Cathedral up in smoke as the fire set in, he bitterly turned back and moved to put distance between him and those that had confined themselves to such a hellish end.
YN: I'm glad I got you out of there, Rem.
Overtly thankful Rem was safe and sound, YN began his snowy trek through the dark, and now completely abandoned section of the Sanctuary.
YN: *Huff* *Puff* *Huff* *Puff*
Throwing open the metallic door to his destination, YN practically threw Rem inside as he moved to get the door shut as quickly as he could, but before he could turn to face his foe—
YN: —Gah! —Ack!
Tearing the fuzzball from his shoulder where it had managed to get a bite out of him, YN threw the Hare down and stomped on it before then swatting away another two that had leaped at him.
Clamoring to the top of where he had set Rem inside of, YN now stood on the roof of his car. Holding his both hands out, he quickly built up mana in them to protect himself.
YN: Jiwald!
White rays of light in this snowy darkness now rained down on the dozens of small white furballs trying to eat him alive.
Yet as he cut down one wave, another danced their way through the snow.
YN: Jiwald! Jiwald! Jiwald!
Again and again, YN cut down the flood of white fur barreling towards him.
YN: Jiwald! Jiwald! Jiwald!
Coming from every direction, YN spun atop the roof of his car shooting out Yang magic. While the hoard continued, unabated, one thing was working to YN's advantage now.
YN: Jiwald! *Huff* Jiwald! *Puff*
With all the intense heat being radiated by his magic as it struck the ground, the snow all around his car was beginning to melt, and a mud pit was forming, drastically slowing down the Great Hare on each wave.
Practically out of mana, YN jumped from his car's roof and landed in the mud below, slipping and falling, he quickly righted himself and swung open the door to the driver's side.
*Clunk!*
And following his successful escape of the Great Hare—
*Bunk* *Bunk* *Bunk*
—the dulled sound of several throwing them against the car could be heard.
YN: *Sigh* Holy shit that was close...
Wiping the sweat from his brow, he looked at Rem in the passenger seat, thankful she was alive. But as much as he wished to dote on the precious blue-haired girl, he knew he dared not to dwell here.
If I wait too long, there's no telling what the Great Hare might try and do to get in here... It might start chewing wires or something...
Firing up the car, YN carefully transversed the mud he had made, and thrust the car down into the snowy path before him. While the tires spun, struggling for traction of any kind, YN cursed the snowy conditions making his getaway difficult. Still though, he had places to be, and goals he wanted to accomplish.
We gotta get back to Subaru. He's obviously still alive.
Navigating the car onto a less snowy path, his car gained more speed as the white masses of fur still pelted themselves at the car. It was so bad YN needed to use the wiper blades so they wouldn't obstruct his vision.
While he knew this Loop was lost, he needed to trust that Subaru still had a plan for garnering more information to make their next try at it more successful. As he finally broke free of the Great Hare hoard, a realization dawned on YN.
YN: —Shit, that's right Emilia is still in the Tomb!
Making a sharp turn, YN piloted his car down a path that led to the Witch of Greed's final resting place. YN hated making Subaru wait longer, but he knew as long as time kept flowing as it did, he was at least still alive.
I really hope Roswaal isn't torturing him or something...
Slow in progress, YN eventually reached the Tomb, and driving right up to its step, he parked the car. Getting out, he wasn't about to leave Rem here alone either, not with the Great Hare still swarming the greater area, but as he went to place his hand on the passenger door handle, YN slammed his fist on the roof in anger at his most recently remembered fact.
YN: Damn it. That's right...
While YN, Subaru, and Emilia were all so accustomed to just entering the Tomb, he recalled that such a luxury couldn't be afforded to Rem.
Unable to bring her inside due to Rem obviously lacking the Qualification to do so, YN knew she'd end up like Roswaal if he tried to take her inside.
As much as he hated to admit it... leaving Rem where she was, was the safest place for her now. But could he leave her here on his own? Looking to her, to the Tomb and thinking of Emilia, and back to Rem, he made a difficult choice.
Subaru wouldn't just leave Rem behind if she was in the Tomb like Emilia is. I have to honor what he would do for me... After all, he brought Rem back from the Mansion unharmed.
Deciding to leave the car running, if only so the heater would keep Rem warm, YN clamored up ice covered steps and ventured inside the Tomb, but as he reached the top, he kicked the snow in anger at yet another realization.
YN: Damn it! We're really screwed...
Just as Rem couldn't enter the Tomb for her own safety, Emilia could not leave the Sanctuary, as the barrier persisted still.
While it was assumed the Great Hare would be barred from entering the Tomb for the same reason Rem was, that made the Tomb the one safe place in the Sanctuary. However, since Rem couldn't enter, that was no longer an option.
The only other place would be my car...
It wasn't ideal, but it was their only option.
YN: If Subaru's still got some sort of a game-plan for what's left of this Loop, he'll need to be able to do it from the car.
Needing to not waste anymore time though, YN entered the Tomb in search of Emilia.
YN: Emilia-sama! Are you in here still?!
Getting no answer, he heard what he thought was motion towards the end of the Tomb's interior, near where the two broken double doors were, so further in, he went. Entering into the room, YN looked about, but—
YN: Huh? Did Emilia-sama leave—
?: —YN.
YN: —Wahhh!
Startling him enough to get him to jump, a voice uttered his name from behind. Turning to see who it was—
Emilia: —Wheeeeeeeere's Subaru?
Slurring her speech like she did when she was intoxicated, YN immediately felt something was... off from the half-elf.
While her clothes might have been a little dusty thanks to spending so much time in this Tomb, YN did notice Emilia's hair was a tad frenzied. Yet, what really caught him off guard was the nearly plastic smile she wore, and the clear lack of any deep emotion in her eyes.
Emilia looked like a doll here, so much so she might have had a string coming out of her back that when pulled, would make her talk more like she was now, completely devoid of her usual bubbly personality.
Something definitely isn't right with Emilia-sama...
Knowing from Subaru that she was already acting strange due to her non-stop attempts at the Trial, he hadn't expected such an ominous air to be in conjunction with it. He could sense something was drastically off-nominal in Emilia, however, he did not know just how much danger he was currently in.
YN: Umm, well, I don't know exactly, Emilia-sama, but we need to leave here so we can find him.
Emilia: Hmmm... No.
Giving it an almost fake consideration, Emilia shook her head as she closed her amethyst eyes. Opening them again, YN noticed the usual sparkle of innocence and life were gone from them.
Emilia: I'm waiting for Subaru. This is the last place he saw me, so I know he'll come back here first. I reeeeeaaally don't want to miss him, and I want to see him as soon as possible! That's why I'm staying right here.
Emilia spoke these words with a tinge of fanaticism to them, which in turn only fueled the oddity YN was feeling, but even so, it wasn't as if he could accept this.
YN: Emilia-sama, please! I recognize your efforts to complete the Trial... I really do. Your determination hasn't gone unnoticed. But right now there's grave dangers befalling the Sanctuary! —The Great Hare has even shown up! So please, Emilia-sama, I cannot allow you to stay—
Emilia: —YN.
With a dark and foreboding tone he'd never heard the silver-haired girl use before, her expression remained unchanged, yet the aura of ominous nature around her greatly intensified. Saying just his name while she was like this halted YN's very mind. After a brief pause, Emilia slowly closed the distance between them, taking small, slow steps towards him.
Emilia: I already offered you the position of being my knight, and you didn't want it.
Completely changing the subject, for every step Emilia made towards him, YN could only manage half a step backwards out of caution.
Emilia: The only person I'll allow to save me, is my knight.
Unsure what her logic was here, it finally got YN to croak out a single "Huh?" from his dry throat, to which it seemed the half-elf ignored. Now with his back against the Tomb's wall, she kept slowly walking towards him.
Emilia: About that too... I think you made the right choice about that. I don't want you as my knight, —you don't do crazy things for other people. —You're not a kind person like that. Only except for...
Now stopping, Emilia turned and looked to the opposite wall where the two destroyed doors still marked the exit of this inner room of the Tomb.
YN: I-I—...
He couldn't argue with her here. From recent events, only one person had been YN's number one concern, and that had definitely begun to become apparent to everyone, Emilia included.
Right now, in these series of Loops, YN knew Emilia needed all the support she could get, yet every action he took, every thought he thought, and every breath he spoke with in the end only had Rem's wellbeing in mind. Given the stress Emilia was under, YN couldn't entirely fault that she might feel a tad slighted over this.
So, rather than be dishonest and avoid it, he figured he should at the very least acknowledge he too was aware of that.
YN: That is... sort of right... I only save my most earnest effort for Rem...
Fully putting himself down, it really hadn't been until now that YN realized how much his goals and motivations had shifted since Rem fell victim to Gluttony. While he wished to profess his honest support of Emilia still, before he could, she herself pressed the subject.
Taking another step towards him, she shook her head, making her silver hair fall before her face, casting it in further shadow while her eyes seemed to radiate light still.
Emilia: Why would you choose someone who sleeps every day over being my knight...?
Asking this, these were her final words that had any sort of calmness to them.
Emilia: —Is it because you hate me? Is that why?
Now only a single step away from each other, YN tried to narrowly bring his hands up to his side in a bid to profess his honesty.
YN: N-Not at all, Emilia-sama, I—!
Emilia: —You won't even call me by just my name! You do hate me, don't you?! You hate me!
Fully closing the distance, YN strained his legs to keep them from buckling under him as he braced himself against the Tomb's wall behind him. Now ever so slightly looking down at him, Emilia's expression turned crazed as the true extent of her broken mind was now on full display.
Emilia: —Only Subaru cares about me! Only Subaru loves me! I only love Subaru!
The more she shouted, the colder the wall behind YN felt.
In fact, the whole room had started to become cold.
This isn't the snow storm making it cold... It's been rather normal in here until now...
Emilia: —Liar! —You're a liar! You don't believe in me! You never have!
Being made to feel shorter and shorter, Emilia forcefully planted her palm into the wall above YN as she seemed to begin to tower over him.
Emilia: —Liar! —Liar! —Liar!
With ice creeping down the wall from her hand towards him now, YN's stunned mind finally broke into action as he ducked under the half-elf's arm and ran directly for the exit.
Fearful he may be stabbed by an ice crystal in the back, nothing came.
As he approached the entrance of the Tomb where the snow drift casually blew in, even in these conditions, it felt noticeably less cold than it had next to Emilia.
Near the exit, YN, overwhelmed by guilt having abandoned Emilia, unable to save her, now stopped and looked back down the dark Tomb's tunnel.
YN (whisper): Forgive me, Emilia-sama, Subaru...
Looking back to the exit, he held a hand to his chest and clenched his eyes shut.
YN: No...
Trying to steel himself, he made himself come to a convenient, but ultimately undeniable truth—
—that wasn't Emilia... not anymore.
While it hurt to say, YN continued his melancholy exit of the Tomb before the sight outside perked him back up.
YN: —Rem!
At the bottom of the steps to the Tomb, his running car was still keeping the maid inside it warm, yet between him and the vessel, a handful of white fur-balls were trying to gain entrance to it.
Damn it!
Running down the snow covered stone steps, he nearly tripped as he put mana into his hand to vanquish these mabeasts that would harm Rem.
YN: Jiwald!
In just one shot, these half dozen or so foes were disintegrated. But, with his haste, the magic had harmed his car too, with it being the backdrop of the Hares.
Where the rays of heat and light had directly shined, the paint was seared away, leaving only the bare metal underneath it. To the edges of these areas though, the paint had bubbled and began to burn black before completely succumbing to the heat.
Making sure he hadn't made an entry point for any future Hares, or had potentially harmed Rem, he threw open the door to check on her.
While a wash of welcoming heat from inside blasted him as he swung the door to the running car open, he sighed in sweet relief as his precious blue-haired girl remained just as she had been.
Getting into the car himself now, as he shut the door, it seemed more white furballs were closing in on them. While the car struggled to move, as it did, the impact of the rabbits throwing themselves at the car could be heard dully from all around like it was hailing.
With no goal or determination now, all that remained to YN was "keep Rem safe." He now found himself aimlessly driving in whatever direction he felt wouldn't get the car stuck. But, with night time fully here, and the snow showing no sign of stopping, he hadn't a clue as to where they were now.
In these conditions, the car wasn't ever able to get away from the Great Hare as it had once done though. They kept mindless swarming the car, trying to in vein to get inside until—
*PPPPSSSSSSHHHHHhhhhhh...*
—They had managed to bite one of the tires enough to pop it.
Definitely needing at least four to get anywhere in this snow, with one down now, the car slowed to a crawl as the Great Hares now seemed to be trying to get in from any angle.
YN: S-Shit!
Fearful now that they sat stationary that they might try and find a way in, YN moved his beloved oni to the back seat, and moved to join her there.
Unable to do anything though, all he could do was cover her body with his own, if only as a last ditch effort to protect her should they get inside.
Clenching his eyes shut and holding Rem beneath him while trying to cover her completely, YN waited for the worst of it as the dull thumping of the many Hares throwing themselves at the windows and doors of the car was incessant.
Like heavy balls of hail falling from above, the impacts were non-stop and a constant reminder to YN that things from here were likely doomed.
All I can do... All I can do is protect Rem to the bitter end... And that's what I'll do!
Holding the one he loved more than anything close to him, YN felt an unknown amount of time pass in this metal box as he waited in hell.
Until—
The sound of impacts stopped, and the precious feeling of Rem in his arms vanished along with it.
—!
Wondering if they had finally broken through the glass and done both Rem and him in, his eyes remained clenched shut, and his body was ridged in preparation for the worst.
Yet, as Rem clearly wasn't in his arms anymore, and the coolness of less stagnant air entered his lungs, he finally reopened his eyes.
Gone was his backseat he had been on.
Gone was Rem from beneath him.
And gone was the danger he found himself in.
YN: A-Ahh...
The sensation of drool ran down his cheek, and as he wiped it away, it was accompanied by dirt.
With his eyes taking in ground before him, he recognized the dank, grimy stone surface.
YN: I'm... I'm back.
Once more, YN was on the floor of the Witch's Tomb, just as he had woken up here many times now.
Saved from the hell he had found himself in, he knew that was only due to one thing, and one thing only.
Subaru must have died...
Picking himself up off the floor, and bracing himself on the wall to stand, YN shook his head, and calmed himself.
It's over...
Not unlike waking from a bad dream, YN knew he didn't have time to sit and reflect on what had just occurred, nor did he want to.
Swallowing his apprehension and guilt, he moved forward, to the exit of the Tomb.
After all, another Loop in Sanctuary had begun.