Young Justice: The Hunter

by NewMystery356

"The Bow and Arrow: Beautiful in its simplicity. Is it coincidence that every culture on Earth developed it independent of one another? Or is it something else? Something in our blood? Something... primal, that allowed us to manifest it? Of course, the trickiest part about hunting, is making sure you're the hunter, and not the hunted. Which are you? I know damn sure what I am."

20. Vertigo: The Tumor

Just a little heads-up before the next chapter starts. Sort of a PSA, but not quite.

Last-chapter, I left details for what SOME might recognize as Saitama's "training menu" from the 2015 anime One Punch Man, which comprised of "100 push-ups, 100 sit-ups, 100 squats, and a 10 kilometer run every single day". However, at MTAC 16-BIT (the 2016 Middle Tennessee Anime Convention), at a panel dedicated to One Punch Man, I learned that this same training menu was proposed to actual doctors and surgeons (by the guy running the panel), and it was determined that doing so would actually cause your heart, lungs, and muscles to give out from the strain. The "clicking" sound Saitama mentioned was actually what happens when the cartilage between your bones is worn away and your bones begin to grind against one another, and that's very bad.

So it goes without saying, DON'T do Saitama's training menu "every single day". It will LITERALLY kill you. I am not joking here.

That sorta-PSA out of the way, let's get on with the show.

P.S.
The above PSA was made on the assumption that this chapter would've been out a lot sooner. So, assuming anyone did do Saitama's training menu verbatim, hopefully they had the common sense to STOP when they started to hurt themselves.

Anyhow, on with the show.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

FoxCry Underground
October 4, 08:30 EST

*Beep*Beep*Beep*Beep*

"Virgil Valentine. Please report to the War Room for additional debriefing," was the first thing the aforementioned brunette heard as soon as he woke up. After the alarm, at least.

"Sure thing, F.I.L.S.S.," Virgil grumbled as he rolled out of his bed. The checks to SECOND took longer than initially projected, so instead of getting home late, he opted to sleep in The Bunker rather than stay up any later. With Dr. Yumeno's assurance that there wouldn't be any more glitches from SECOND, due to the addition of some new self-correcting software to the built-in DNA Computer, the brunette decided to take the good doctor's word for it and sleep off the last mission. While Armor Mode had protected him perfectly, he still had a bit of bruising, and the muscles in his shoulders ached from using that grappling hook over and over, so it was safe to assume he'd fallen asleep as soon as his head had hit the pillow.

That the individual cabins were largely sound-proof also helped.

One elevator ride to the War Room later, and Virgil took his seat, a pair of AR sunglasses waiting for him. Putting them on, he blinked his eyes a couple times before his vision focused on the hologram of Roy Campbell sitting across from him.

"Good morning, Colonel."

"Hello, Virgil."

"I'm told you wanted to see me for an additional debriefing. What did you need to ask me that wasn't already covered?"

"It's about that name you used when you confronted your pursuer after the completion of your secondary objective. Special Agent Washington?" the man asked with a raised eyebrow.

"It was just a McGuffin I made up on the fly to throw her off my trail. From what I know, misdirection is a big part of the spy game. Or whatever game I'm a part of."

"And it shows. Internet traffic from Ms. Crock's home cited multiple searches for Special Agent Washington, and that by itself is enough to confirm your prior suspicions that she's the one who chased you while in-costume."

"Did she actually find anything?"

"Other than a few historical articles and some conspiracy theory sites, nothing concrete. Special Agent Washington is a name that's been dropped in the past by enigmatic figures numerous times in various places all over the world. However, since there's no discernible pattern, its usage has been ruled off a coincidence and nothing more."

"What about when I said QPCS? Did that cause her to cue anything up from google?"

"That particular acronym has been safeguarded by FOXHOUND's cyber-division, so all she really found were millions of sites about cardboard boxes, how they're manufactured, what they're made of, and so-on."

"Huh… Well holy shit, I can't believe that actually worked," Virgil said in surprise. He knew people were idiots sometimes, but hot damn!

"You'd be surprised. Most people are willing to believe whatever's easiest to swallow, because it requires the least amount of work on their parts. For example, most people deny the existence of Magic, or Espers, or Monsters because it conflicts with their own perception of reality, which they aren't willing to forfeit."

"Espers? As in move-things-with-your-mind Espers? No exposure to radioactive waste, just pure mind-over-matter power?"

"Precisely."

"And wait, what did you mean by Monsters?"

"That's a story for another time. We'll bump up your security clearance eventually. Play your cards right and maybe you'll get to fight some of them."

"Fair enough," Virgil said shrugging his shoulders. Though in actuality he'd rather not fight legit monsters. "Is that all, or did you need anything else?"

"No. I only needed confirmation on how you knew that particular name. Now that I know it as merely coincidence, my business here is concluded. You don't need to think on it any further."

"Like I said, I made it up on the fly. Haven't heard anyone else use that name until just now," the brunette replied as Colonel's hologram disappeared, and he removed the AR sunglasses. *Growrrrrrr* "Hm. I wonder what they're serving for breakfast in the mess hall," Virgil thought as he got up from his seat.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

'It just occurred to me that I've made more money in the past month then I have on every previous birthday, Christmas, chores, and allowance put together,' Virgil thought to himself as he rode the bus back to the Red Light. This promoted thoughts on what kind of place he would buy, what kinds of furniture he'd furnish it with, the kind of food he'd buy, and so-on.

*SCREEEEECH*

The bus lurching to a stop a block away from his destination, the brunette disembarked and made his way home, hands in his pockets. As he walked, his mind raced at the number of earth-shattering revelations that he'd just learned about.

He'd just heard full-blown admission, by the government, that Magic, Espers, and Monsters were officially recognized as real. Superman and Martian Manhunter as well as the Appellaxians proved the existence of Martians beyond a reasonable doubt, while most of the superpowers in the possession of various heroes and villains were all accredited to being the doings of genetic quirks like the X-Gene or the Meta-Gene. While before he had a healthy amount of skepticism towards the existence of Magic, Espers, and Monsters, now that he had actual confirmation that they existed, that… that just changed everything.

'Dr. Fate and the Sorcerer Supreme? Pretty good chance they exist. Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster? Pretty good chance they exist too. The Third Child and the Man on Fire? Those guys definitely exist,' the brunette thought to himself, remembering a couple of the Cold War conspiracies that he and Dana had talked about between scavenging missions. Without any radio or TV, there wasn't a whole lot they could do in their off-time without giving themselves away.

Suffice it to say, after Blackwatch and everything else he'd seen in the past couple of months, he was perfectly willing to admit that there wasn't such a thing as "no such thing". All that he really had left to prove or disprove to himself was the existence of God, and that was like trying to prove whether or not the Devil was real, hence "The Devil's Proof" paradox.

'I'm just glad I have some off-time before my next mission. Whenever that is,' Virgil thought to himself as he ran his fingers through his hair. 'I'm looking forward to a little normal-time. As normal as things get in this household at least,' he thought as he looked up at the neon Moxxxi's Red Light sign. "Moxxiiiii. I'm hooooooome," the brunette called out as he entered.

"I see what you did there, 'sug. Welcome back," Moxxi greeted from behind the counter.

"Glad to be back. I finished your errand and got your reply to boot," Virgil said passing along Paula's letter.

"Thanks, 'sug. You're a real sweetheart," she said pinching his cheek jokingly as she stashed the letter within her voluptuous cleavage. "Here's your compensation for a job well done," she said tossing him an ice cold root beer from under the counter.

"Happy to oblige," Virgil said as he stepped behind the counter and made his way upstairs. *Sigh* "Home sweet home," the brunette sighed as he crashed on the couch.

"Wassup my nigga?" Tina greeted as she jumped into the brunette's lap and knocked the air out of him.

"Ngh. Not much," Virgil grunted as he picked the pre-teen up and set her down next to him. "How's the homestead?"

"S'all good my brutha from anotha mutha."

"I see. You do anything interesting while I was out?"

He wasn't even going to pretend to understand how the girl's head worked.

"I made some new heat-seeking badonkadonks and some lollipop grenades," the messy blond said with an ear-to-ear grin. "You want one?" she said holding up what looked like an inconspicuous grape-flavored lollipop, which only under closer observation revealed the tiny explosive device wherewithin.

"No thanks… I'm good…" the brunette said nervously.

"Yeah, you're probably right about that. The black powder totally messes with the flava," the tiny blond replied with a shrug. "That reminds me for whateva reason: You wanna know how it works?"

"You'll tell me how it works anyway, so go ahead."

"Okay first, ya gots ta shove it up some fool's grill," Tina said shoving it up his grill, a flood of adrenaline surging through his system the moment the grape-and-black-powdery-flavor danced across his taste buds. Especially since he had a live FUCKING GRENADE in his mouth! "Then you pull the pin," she said jerking the stick out of his mouth. "Then-"

"Dang it, Tina! No live explosives in the house!" Shaula shouted as she forced Virgil's mouth open, pulled the lolli-bomb out of his mouth, and then chucked it out of the nearest window and into the back alley behind the bar, a vertical deluge of garbage soaring into the air the moment she closed the window again. "What the hell were you thinking! You could've killed Virgil with that thing!"

"Hey, it's cool, girl. Worst he'd need is a dentist," Tina shrugged off.

'Oh, I so pity the dude who pressures her into prom sex...' Virgil thought as he slumped back into the couch, the flood of adrenaline dying down as Athena dragged Tina to her room by the ear, present crisis now averted. "Note to self. Never open my mouth around that girl."

"I could've told you that," Rina said vaulting onto the seat next to him. "So, how was Gotham?"

"Well, I didn't become the butt of one of the Joker's jokes or get mauled by Killer Croc, so I'll consider that last trip a rousing success," he said taking off his hat. "What about you? Anything interesting happen at school the other day?"

"Nah. Same old same old," the girl shrugged. "By the way, you dropped this."

"My to-do list!" the brunette squealed as he snatched the yellowed piece of paper from the girl's hand. "Where did you find this?"

"You left it in the living room the other day," Rina replied with a shrug of her shoulders. "By the way. Get Laid? If the wrong person in this almost-all-girls household saw that on your to-do list, they might think you're some kinda pervert, you sly dog you," she said waggling her eyebrows at him.

"The contents of this list are deeply personal! And private!"

"Oh it's private alright, heheheh."

"I'm starting to see the resemblance between you and Moxxi. Just thought I'd let you know."

"Hey, don't worry about it. My mom had that on her to-do list when she was a teenager too. Nothing to get your knickers in a twist over."

"That doesn't make me feel any better," the brunette deadpanned realizing he had anything in common with the woman. If his parents were still alive, there wouldn't have been any doubt in his mind of her being the sort of "bad influence" they didn't want him around.

"But let me make something abundantly clear," the young woman said as she looked him dead in the eye, her pupils dilating into slits and her hair standing on end. "If you think for a second that I'm going to let you make Athena into just a notch in your bedpost, you've got another thing coming," she growled lowly as she raised her knuckles to his chin, a trio of crimson energy claws suddenly lancing through the air less than a millimeter away from his face. "Do you understand me?"

"Yes ma'am," the brunette returned as a bead of sweat rolled down his temple, his eyes dancing from Rina's to the energy claws protruding from between her knuckles. 'If I didn't learn that Magic, Espers, and Monsters were real-real today, I might actually be surprised by this,' he thought idly at the recent revelation less than a millimeter away from his face.

"Great!" Rina said with a smile as she retracted her claws and brought her hands together, looking notably less wild. "Athena really does like you, and-"

"RINA!" a red-faced Athena screeched as she poked her head from around the corner.

"Gottagobye!" the once-feral teen said as she ran off, a red-faced Athena shaking her fist at the girl as she ran downstairs.

"I am… so sorry she threatened you like that," Athena said as she came up to him and put her hands on his face. "She didn't hurt you, did she? Do you feel any numbness in your face? How many fingers am I holding up?"

"No, no, and three," the brunette replied as he wiped the sweat from his brow. "Scared the living daylights out of me, yes. But no, she didn't hurt me."

"Listen… about what you saw a second ago…" the blond said nervously.

"Mum's the word," Virgil said as he made a lip-zipping motion with his hand. "So… Do you want to talk, or do you have something else to do? Cause I can get out of your hair if you want."

"No!" Athena yelled before collecting herself. "I mean… Yes. I want to talk."

"Alright… So where do we start?" Virgil asked.

"Virgil… I've been thinking about this a lot lately and… I don't find you… unattractive… per-se," the blond started as she took off her glasses and polished the lenses nervously with the end of her shirt. "When I went through puberty, my similarities to my mother became readily apparent, and I got a lot of attention I didn't really want at my old school," she said hiking up her T-shirt to show off her midriff and tying the end to reveal her hourglass figure, one normally hidden by unflattering clothing. "When I stopped going to public school, I'd contented myself to working in my lab, making gadgets and gizmos, helping my mom make ends meet and occasionally working part-time as tech support. But then… I met you… and I started having these… feelings," she said nervously rubbing her thighs together. "I'm not as outgoing as my mom, or as confident as my older sister, nor am I as comfortable with myself as my younger sister, but… I want to know… What do you think of me?" she asked looking at him with large soulful eyes.

"Athena… I'm not going to lie to you, you're one of the most beautiful girls I've ever met," he admitted. "You're smart, you're pretty, and you're confident even if you don't think that way about yourself…" the brunette trailed off, Athena's face reddening with each compliment. "To be brutally honest I've… never had much luck with the opposite sex… Haven't even had a first date, so even though I might have certain… feelings for you, I'm not really sure what to do in this kind of situation."

"Didn't your mom or your dad tell you what to do in these situations?" Athena asked.

"My parents… They died when I was little, and since then I've bounced through foster home… until I made my way here," Virgil answered. If he was going to open up to anyone about this, it may as well've been the girl he liked.

"Oh…" Athena said with widened eyes, now realizing where some of the brunette's mannerisms stemmed from. "Well, I guess we're both a little new at this, huh?" the blond said nervously, blushing bright red as she untied her shirt and hid her midriff again. "So uh… I have no idea what to do from here…"

"Me neither."

" . . . "

" . . . "

" . . . "

"Kiss him already!" Tina, Rina, Shaula, and Moxxi all said from the doorway to the stairwell, the two on the couch flushing bright red and scattering in opposite directions upon being caught.

" . . . I think we may've pushed them a little too far," Moxxi admitted.

"You think?" Shaula sighed.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

"Well… That could've gone better," Virgil sighed as he sat against the lip of the roof.

"Girl troubles?" a familiar voice asked.

"Yeah. I always sucked at talking to the opposite sex. Wait, when'd you get here?"

"I've been up here a while," Lilith returned, sitting on a reclining lawn chair, clad in a pink bikini with a tanning mirror in her lap.

"What, did you hear us through the vents?"

"No."

"Then how'd you know this was about girl troubles?"

"You and Athena have been skirting around each other all week. Then you go out of town and that girl's left pacing around the living room in circles thinking about you. Trust me, she wants to punch your V-Card bad."

"I'm… not sure she's ready to go that far with me," Virgil replied nervously as he looked away. While Lilith's tattoos were interesting, practically alien in origin, he didn't want to do anything that'd hurt his standing with Athena now that they were talking to one another again.

"She's a sexually-repressed seventeen year-old girl and you brought some kinda next-gen suit to her doorstep to tinker with. If that doesn't get you on her good side, nothing will," Lilith shrugged. "Plus, if I were into cradle-robbing, I'd want to snatch you up myself. You're pretty cute. For a kid I mean."

"I'm turning seventeen in two months," Virgil deadpanned.

"Wait, really?" the red-head asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, really," Virgil groaned. "What is it about my face that makes people think I'm some kinda kid?"

"You just have a young face," Lilith replied, keeping the "feminine undertones" part to herself. Guys got a bit touchy about being told they looked like their mothers. "Trust me, you'll appreciate having a young-looking face in a couple years. But just remember that too much sun is a bad thing. Mordecai has a lot of wrinkles under that mask of his, and Roland's aged a little more than he should've as well."

"What about Brick?"

"Guy doesn't have the prettiest face around, so it's kinda hard to tell if he's aged gracefully or not," Lilith shrugged.

"I feel like we've gotten off track here. Girl troubles?"

"Right. Girl troubles. Getting back on topic," Lilith said leaning back. "Look, I'm not really the best girl to talk to for about dating advice. When my tattoos appeared and I started taking the fireball express, guys weren't exactly lining up to take me to the movies. And then there's my own love life, or lack thereof… Look, just try to do right by her, and Scooter won't have to put you in a shallow grave like he did to Lucky."

"Wait, that really happened? I thought that was just a local folk tale or something!"

"No, it really happened. And now you know why Scooter isn't allowed through The Dust. Or near any Irish people for that matter."

"Too much information," Virgil groaned as he rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Anyway… love life or lack thereof… Where would you recommend I take Athena out?"

"Certainly not in this part of town," Lilith said jabbing her thumb over her shoulder. "I'd recommend the better part of town, but that goes without saying. First-date, I'd recommend a down-to-earth diner, nothing fancy-enough to make her uncomfortable, and then a movie after that."

"Down-to-earth diner and movie… Got it," Virgil hummed as he made a mental memo.

"Of course the most-awkward part is that you both live under the same roof, so if things go south, you'll both basically be wallowing in it for the next couple of weeks until things stop getting awkward."

"You are a fount of information," Virgil groaned. "No, I shouldn't be talking like that," he said shaking his head, realizing she was absolutely right. "Thanks for the talk. I feel better about asking her out."

"Glad I could help, kid," Lilith said giving him a two-finger salute. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got some sunbathing to get back to."

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

Bludhaven
October 5, 08:54 EST

It was the following morning, and Virgil felt strange, not having to get up and go to work since he was let go from Marcus Munitions and made into a freelance courier. However it wasn't him being fired that felt strange, but all the thoughts swirling around in his head, both from looking at the Diamond Dogs patch, and what Balalaika said. So, like any intelligent individual, he hit up the internet search engine for Diamond Dogs.

Ignoring the information concerning a record of the same name from David Bowie and the courier service run by the Russians, he narrowed down the search engine to the Cold War, just like Balalaika said, and came upon something interesting.

Back during the Cold War, the legendary soldier known as Big Boss founded a Private Military Corporation known as the Militaires Sans Frontieres, which was French for "Army Without Borders". PMCs were non-state organizations composed of professional soldiers, providing various military services in exchange for monetary or material compensation. Supposedly, Big Boss created it to prevent the callous throwing-away of soldiers by their home nations both before and after their deaths, something many soldiers could get behind because their home nations treated their lives as expendable, yet treated the lives of do-nothing politicians and civilians as precious and to be protected above all-else.

Sometime after its founding, the MSF was investigated for suspicion of possessing nuclear weapons, something that made them the target of the entire world, and then just as mysteriously disappeared for a decade or so. After that came the Diamond Dogs mercenary group, which made a huge splash in the Cold War because they seized thousands of nuclear warheads, and thereafter proceeded to vitrilize them so that they could never be used again. For the first time ever, the world was truly nuke-free, an accomplishment that quickly disappeared, but did not go unnoticed.

Hell, the Diamond Dog's actions could've very well been what prevented a Fallout-style nuclear holocaust.

As a result of this, a trend following Big Boss' actions followed. Soon, dozens of PMCs all over the world began cropping up, and military policy regarding the "expendability" of their soldiers was forced to change. It was either that, or have soldiers continually get proper leave of absence only to put in their chips with groups that would pay them for their services and treat them like human beings instead of pawns to be thrown away.

That just raised the question…

"What are they doing now?" Virgil asked himself as he looked up from his laptop to the Diamond Dogs Delivery uniform hanging from his closet. Mercenary-to-courier seemed like a bit of a step down, but what if that wasn't what they were really doing? What if "courier" was just another word for "mercenary" and they were simply using that as cover to go wherever they wanted before shooting the place up? And the original Diamond Dogs comprised of dozens of ethnicities (supposedly), so if the Russians joined up with Hotel Moscow, where'd the rest of them go?

'I really hope Balalaika doesn't start soliciting me to perform acts of murder,' the brunette sighed to himself as he shut off the browser. It was one thing to deliver stuff for the Russians, but if those deliveries began to entail propelled lead at speeds in excess to 2,500 feet per second, that was a whole different matter. While it was true he might have to kill people under the employ of FoxCry, he'd rather not have murder under the Russian Mafia's name under his belt. One he'd have government cover-ups to hide, but the latter, if anyone ever found out, would be a black spot on his otherwise impeccable charge-free criminal record.

'I shouldn't be thinking about that right now. I have real stuff to think about.'

Said "real" stuff was the matter of his personal life. He'd seen people focused so wholly on work that they burned themselves out, and it was not a pretty picture. He didn't want to wind up like that, so he was going to steadfastly cling to whatever vestige of normalcy he could. And first item on the agenda was to have a healthy, non-working relationship with someone of the opposite gender.

Seeing how Athena kinda liked him and he kinda liked her, that seemed as good a place to any to start.

Of course, like Lilith said, the biggest problem was that if things went south for them, they'd have to wallow in it. As good a reason as any to ensure that things did not go south, and that meant laying down the groundwork for a great first date. Hopefully the start of many.

"Things were much simpler in high school. Before the bulletproof zombies. And the monsters. And the Nazis…" he trailed off. "Yep. All semblance of normalcy has completely abandoned me. I'm not even eighteen yet!" he raged. " . . . And I have got to stop talking to myself," he realized a few moments later.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

'Thank god for smartphones,' Virgil thought to himself as he tapped away at his hand-held screen, looking up hot dating spots and movie listings with one hand while making notes on-paper with the other.

'Alright, let's see what kinda movies are running,' he hummed to himself. "Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant… Pass. Whip It!... Doesn't seem like Athena's tastes. Law Abiding Citizen… I'll give that a soft maybe. Amelia… That has potential. Zombieland… We might be able to get a good laugh out of that. The Invention of Lying… That also seems good." Tapping his pencil against his chin, he crossed out two, put a M for Maybe on the third, and left the other three unmarked. "Alright, I've got movie listings and times, and a few money-friendly family diners in the good section of town in mind," he said setting his notes down before letting out a deep sigh. "C'mon, Virgil. You're only asking out a really nice girl… who you happen to live with. This isn't like the Red Zone or when you went Hulk hunting. You've got this."

Throwing his legs over the side of the bed, Virgil took a calming breath as he walked up to the mirror, straightening his hair and clothes. Satisfied that everything was in order, he rounded on his door before marching his way down the stairs. Passing by the living room, he immediately fell under the scrutiny of Shaula and Tina as he made his way to the bedrooms. Taking another calming breath, he raised his hand to the door to knock, only to rap his knuckles through empty air when the door opened suddenly.

"Y-Yes?" the blond asked nervously.

"Uh… Hey, Athena," Virgil greeted. 'Dammit man, what's wrong with you? Get it together man!'

"H-Hello, Virgil."

"So um… What're you working on?"

"Oh, you know… Stuff."

"Ah, I see," Virgil said scratching the back of his neck. "When might you… When might you be on break?"

"My work materials should be exhausted by Wednesday. Why do you ask?" she questioned as she twirled a loch of her hair nervously.

"Well, I was just wondering if maybe Wednesday evening you wanted to go to dinner, maybe see a movie together if you're in the mood."

"I'd love to!" she shouted before blushing. "Uh, I mean… I'd really like that."

"Cool! Ah, I mean… I'll be by to pick you up at seven."

"That sounds lovely. I'll see you then," the blond said with a smile.

"You know the two of you live together, right?" Tina asked skeptically as she poked her head around the corner. "You're gonna see each other loads of times before then."

"Tina! Go back to your shows!" the two of them shouted at her, causing her to raise her hands in defeat as she disappeared back into the living room. "So yeah, seven, right?" Virgil asked.

"Yeah, I should be finished by then," Athena replied.

"Cool. I'll pick you up right here."

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

Bludhaven
October 6

For the two lovebirds, the following days went by in a flash. With a set date time, er… set, the two teens were marginally less nervous around one another. While before they were skittish as rabbits, they were now much more comfortable around one another, almost all evidence of their former nerves completely vanished.

Whenever Moxxi wasn't working, she'd take every opportunity to pull her daughter aside and confer years of worldly advice to her. Virgil had no idea what they were talking about, and it wasn't his place to pry so he didn't try to eavesdrop. However, whenever he walked past her she would blush, yet at the same time smile in a way that both horrified and aroused him.

Horroused, you might say.

Of course, just because he didn't have any blood relatives around, didn't mean there weren't those willing to offer their own worldly advice to him. And by "willing to offer", I of course mean, a bunch of grown-ass men completely butting in because other than getting drunk after coming back stateside from some third-world country, which coincidentally they had to shoot their way/murder their way out of, they had nothing better to do.

One example went as such…

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

Bludhaven
October 7, 17:45 EST

"So she's hot?" Mordecai asked.

"She's gorgeous," Virgil answered. Whether it was with her glasses on or she was flaunting what she had, the middle-child of the Moxxi family gave him full-blown limerence. Or in layman's terms, she gave him "butterflies".

"Then… she's crazy."

"No, she's not."

"Dude, there is no way she's above the line on the hot-crazy scale," the masked man argued as he fed his bird scraps.

'Isn't having some big-ass bird in here some kind of health code violation?' Virgil questioned to himself. "She's not even on the hot-crazy scale, she's just hot," he argued. "What even is the hot-crazy scale?"

"Oh, well let me illustrate," Mordecai said as he pulled a whiteboard on an easel from… somewhere, drawing a large L shaped line in one corner. "A girl is allowed to be Crazy, as long as she is equally Hot," he said drawing CRAZY beneath the x-axis, and HOT beside the y-axis. "Thus if she is this crazy," he said pointing to the R, "she is allowed to be this hot," he said drawing an X an equal distance up the y-axis from across the x-axis. "If she's this crazy, she has to be thiiiis hot," he said drawing an X in the very far upper-right corner of the graph. "You want the girl to be above this line," he said drawing a yellow line through the two Xs at a 45 degree angle, "also known as the Vicky Vendosa Diagonal."

"Who the heck is Vicky Vendosa?" Virgil felt the need to ask.

"This girl I dated. She played jump rope with that line," the masked man answered. "She'd shave her head," he said drawing a circle over the Z and under the line. "She'd lose ten pounds," he then added as he drew a line from there to past the yellow line next to the T. "She'd stab me with a fork," he said drawing a diagonal line through the yellow and making a circle past the Y. "Then get a boob-job," he clarified by drawing another line straight across before making another circle by the H. "I wonder if she's still single…"

'I seriously need some new friends,' Virgil sighed to himself. 'Hell, I'd settle for a green-haired pickpocket and her love/hate-relationship cyborg boyfriend/not-boyfriend at this point,' he thought letting his mind wander off the range big-time.

His mind wandered from time to time. Maybe as a coping mechanism for all the shit he'd seen.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

Present…

Suffice it to say, that and other nuggets of wisdom were rather… questionable.

All things considered, Lilith offered the best advice out of any of them. Then again, Roland was rather straight-laced, so if he weren't busy being so stoic and curbing his colleague's more eccentric tendencies, Virgil suspected the man would've given him good advice too. It was pretty much just Mordecai and Brick giving him the crap-advice that'd never fly in the real world. Or at least not with the kind of girls he wanted to eventually hook up with.

"Remember, Slab, this date of yours is going to be strictly casual, so you don't want to dress too fancy, but on the same vein you don't want to come across as a complete slob," Brick told Virgil from the doorway as the brunette looked through his clothes for something nice to wear. The man was so large he had to stand sideways and take a knee so he'd fit through the frame.

"I've been meaning to ask, what's this Slab thing about?" he asked as he held different hoodies in front of himself by the mirror.

"Every guy needs a tough-guy nickname, and nothing says tough like Slab."

"What's your nickname then?"

"I dunno. Slab King I guess," the man shrugged. "And instead of a scepter I'd wield a sledgehammer. Only instead of a sledgehammer, it'd be like an engine block on a stick."

"I fear for whatever kingdom you might rule," the brunette sighed as he imagined the man swinging around an engine block on-a-stick at a knighting ceremony. It was not a pretty image. *SPLAT* In fact it was very messy.

"I too fear my own potential as a ruler of men," Brick replied with a nod, not catching Virgil's meaning as an insult rather than a compliment.

"Uh huh…" Virgil sighed before he held out the two hoodies. "What do you think? This one, or the other?" he asked holding up a blue hoodie with white lines running down the sleeves and a belly-pocket in his right hand, and an olive-drab zip-up hoodie in the right.

"Hmmm… The blue one makes your eyes pop more, but they also clash a little bit. Then again, the green goes better with your pants, but it seems a little too low-key."

"I see…" Virgil said as he laid them out on his bed. Along with every other piece of clothing he owned, though it wasn't many. At the moment he was wearing his sneakers, tan cargo pants, and a black T-shirt, but even that was subject to change. Since the weather was getting chilly, he was deciding whether he should bundle up in layers, use a jacket, or a hoodie. "I bet Athena's having an easier time at this than me. She actually has clothes to wear, all I have are a few cheap outfits to fall back on."

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

"I have nothing to wear!" the brainy blonde cried in panic.

"Athena. I think you might be exaggerating," Lilith deadpanned as the blond continued to flip out, flinging articles of clothing out of her closet into a pile in the middle of the room.

"Just because I have clothing to wear doesn't mean I have clothing to wear," the girl argued. "Uuuuugh…! Why is this so hard?"

"Maybe 'cause those assholes at your old school chased you out before you could meet a decent guy," the raven-haired girl shrugged. "Probably for the best. Those guys were dicks anyway."

"What do I do what do I do what do I do?" the blond cried as she paced around her pile of clothes. "Okay… Okay… Think of this like a math problem... Color A goes with B but not with C. If D is involved, then A cannot go with B…"

"Thena, not everything is a math problem. There's these things called variables, remember?" Shaula asked as she dug through the pile of clothes. "Look, your lab coat's your signature, so let's work around that. Play up the sexy scientist angle while still keeping it classy," she said tossing a few articles onto the bed.

*Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep-Beep*

"Aaaah! It's time!" the blond squealed as her alarm went off. "Oh-no-oh-no-oh-no-oh-no! This is bad! This is so bad! I'm not dressed yet! I'm going to make him wait! He's going to think I'm one of those shallow girls who makes a guy wait for two hours! I don't want him to think I'm some kind of skank!"

*WHAP*

"Get a grip, girl!" Moxxi said rolling up her newspaper. "Moxxi women do not have panic attacks before a big date. We are calm, composed, and fantasize about what's to come after the fact."

"Mother, I'm not like you! I don't have sex with guys on the first date, every date!" the blond snapped. "I… I'm sorry, I didn't mean…"

"It's fine, it's fine," the woman said as she ruffled her daughter's hair. "I didn't have a mother who cared about my future like that. I'm just glad in this regard, you aren't like me, is all."

"I… I didn't mean for it to come out like-"

"Don't worry about it. You've got a strapping young lad on his way here, and you wouldn't want him to see you so distressed, would you?"

"No, I guess not," Athena said as she went to the bed.

*Knock-Knock*

"Mom, go out and stall him! I'll make sure Athena's ready," Shaula ordered as she helped sort out clothing.

"Sure thing, sweetie," Moxxi said with a smile as she stepped out, closing the door before Athena could begin disrobing. " . . . You're not Virgil."

"No I am not," Rina replied. "Hey sis? You do know that if you sorted out your stuff yesterday you wouldn't be having this freak-out today, right?"

"I don't need to hear it!" Athena shouted from the other side of the door. The frantic rustling of clothing could also be heard. Just not to anyone else but her.

"So, how's our little genius doing? That might be panic I smell, but it could also be just about anything else she keeps in that room," Rina shrugged. "You did tell her to not keep radioactive material in there, right?"

"Gave her that talk last Christmas after Mr. Gerbil got a six-pack."

"Right…" the second-youngest sister said, her nostrils flaring. "It seems like Virgil's finally ready to come down. You think she's ready?"

"I'd like to think I prepared her as best we could. All that's left to do now, is let her find her own slice of the Moxxi family charm," the sensual woman replied. "Don't worry, sweetie. It's just a date."

"It isn't just a date. It's our first date! And if things go south because I wore an outfit he couldn't stand to look at, one of us is going to have to move out!"

"Sis, listen, if he's put off by something as superficial as looks, then he isn't worth your time," Rina said rapping her knuckles on the door.

"Says the tomboy in khakis who got a locker-full of love-notes on Valentines Day," Athena argued. "You didn't even try to get all of them interested in you. I'm not like you."

"Okay, bad example…" Rina realized. "Look, point is, it's confidence that's sexy. It isn't the clothes, it's the girl wearing them."

"Look, I'm just not comfortable doing things without enough data to formulate a predictive algorithm to help determine the outcome and manipulate the sequence of events in my favor."

"We get it. You like math. Control makes you feel safe. It's why so many people are adamant that magic and the supernatural is bullshit," Rina sighed as she flexed her energy claws. "But the real world isn't like a sandbox game. You can't do a Soft Reset until you can make things turn out the way you want. Things happen at random and you can't control them."

" . . . And here I thought I was the smart one in the family," Athena sighed. "Is Virgil coming?"

"He's coming down the stairs now," Moxxi replied.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

'Alright, man. Keep it together. One foot in front of the other. Keep breathing. Remember the game plan. And whatever you do, do not say anything stupid,' Virgil said as he walked down the stairs, his heart pumping in his chest. Back in the Red Zone, he probably would've been swimming in adrenaline with how high his stress levels were, his ears picking up every little noise he made down to the dropping of a pin. Thankfully, the counter-adrenalants he'd been taking for the past few weeks dulled his bio-chemistry to a manageable level.

At the very least, he was "normal enough" to go on something as innocuous as a first date.

'Living room on the right. Kitchen on the left. Bedrooms front and center,' he said taking in the Moxxi family homestead. 'I'm wearing one of my better outfits, so I just hope I'm not over or under-dressed,' he told himself as he approached the door, Moxxi and Rina waiting for him. "Evening, Moxxi. Evening, Rina."

"Evening, 'sug," Moxxi greeted.

"Hey," Rina returned casually.

'That this girl can keep a straight face after threatening me with those lightsabers she keeps between her knuckles is truly amazing,' Virgil noted as he took in the wild girl's poker face. Now he just wondered who the girl's father was because that shit had to be genetic. "So… Am I early? Late?" he asked looking down at his watch.

"Just a bit early, but that's fine," Moxxi replied. "If you're on time, then that's the same as being late."

"I'll be sure to keep that in mind," Virgil replied. The turning of the knob swiftly drawing his attention to Athena's room, slender fingers wrapped around the edge of it through the crack, the door slowly creaking open. Virgil gulped nervously as Athena came out into the open, his heart leaping into his throat and skipping a beat all at once.

Cue – Careless Whisper by George Michael

"So… How do I look?" Athena asked bashfully.

"Wow… Just… wow," Virgil gawped as he took in the sight before him. Whereas before, Athena's clothing was largely unflattering, more condusive to a work environment than a social one, what she was wearing for the evening was like comparing night to day.

Her attire for the evening consisted of a tight black skirt that stopped below mid-thigh and hugged her hips, a red blouse that accentuated her figure while showing off a tasteful amount of cleavage, and a clean white lab coat thrown over her shoulders. In place of the sneakers she usually wore, she now had black high heeled shoes, the pointed heels giving her a little more height as well as elegance. Most notable was her lack of coke bottle glasses, possibly swapped out for contacts, and that her hair was worn down, accentuating her delicate features.

"H-Hello, Virgil," the genius greeted nervously as she moved to adjust her glasses, only to blush upon realizing they were no longer there. Virgil's attire consisted of nice black sneakers with white laces, tan cargo pants, a form-fitting black T-shirt with, ironically enough, the Superman logo on it in red, and a dark green hoodie with the zipper undone. The sleeves were also rolled up, revealing strong muscular arms, the tightness of his shirt showing off the strength of his frame and the flatness of his stomach.

The two teens drank one another in for a few moments, Shaula peeking through the door while Moxxi and Rina watched on with baited breath, the moment dying when the two's eyes widened and they realized what was off about that scenario.

"TINA! WE DO NOT NEED MOOD MUSIC!" both Virgil and Athena raged at the little blond girl who chose that music to play at that exact moment. Athena didn't remember what music it was, only that it was that one really iconic theme with the saxophone in it that played right as people were about to… You know… Have sex or otherwise do sensual things to one another.

End Soundtrack

'Great. Now that's going to be bugging me all night,' Virgil groaned to himself as the earworm dug itself into his brain like a Nazi in the trenches. "So…" he coughed nervously as he regained his composure. "Shall we go out for the evening, my fair lady?" he asked extending his hand to her. 'My fair lady? What the fuck, man!?' he raged at himself upon realizing how stupid that sounded. 'You agreed not to say anything stupid this evening! The hell's wrong with you?!'

"Why, Virgil, how chivalrous of you," Athena said taking his hand, fluttering her eyelashes at him. Glancing over the brunette's shoulder, wondering if she did it right, she saw her mother giving her two thumbs-up, the blond nodding her head as she went along with her date for the evening.

"Don't those two look cute together," Rina chuckled as she made her way to the sofa.

"Didn't you threaten to disembowel him through his nose the other day?" Shaula asked skeptically.

"Hey, sisters threaten each other's prospective boyfriends before they start dating all the time."

"Yeah… I remember those days fondly…" Moxxi sighed whimsically as she pulled a familiar gun from her cleavage and stroked it tenderly like one would their own child. Or a certain part of the male anatomy.

Come on, this is Moxxi we're talking about. You knew this sorta innuendo was coming.

"That explains so much," Shaula sighed as she rubbed the bridge of her nose.

"You think they'll be okay?" Tina asked in a rare moment of no-nonsense.

"I'm sure they'll be fine as long as nothing goes wrong," Moxxi said as she made her way back down to the bar. "After all, what's the worst that could happen?"

" . . . Ohhhhh shit," Rina, and Shaula both gawped.

"Daaaayum, girl. Bitch just jinxed them, yo!" Tina blurted out in stereotypical black-girl speak.

"Yes, we're both aware of that," Shaula sighed.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

For lack of better options, the two teens took one of the few busses that commuted between the good and bad sides of town towards the site of their date. Even though the clientele was a little more classy than those who frequented the Red Light, Marcus Munitions, Doctor Zed's, or even Catch-A-Ride, there were still a few bad eggs that were hungrily eyeing Athena up and down like a piece of meat. To counter this, Virgil protectively wrapped an arm around her body and hugged her to him, gently squeezing her hand in reassurance as he looked over his shoulder.

Bringing up every ounce of anger, hate, and rage he kept bottled up for so long, he allowed all these dark feelings to bubble up through his crimson eyes as he narrowed them dangerously at the other bus-goers. His brows knitting themselves together and the corner of his lips raised in a snarl, apparently whatever the brunette was doing worked, because the next moment any would-be pests quickly found anything else on the semi-clean bus to be much more titillating than the dressed-up genius.

Thankfully, their ride came to a stop before anyone did anything they'd regret, Virgil guiding Athena out by the hand, the pretty blond sticking close to his side as they stepped out of the bus into the nicer part of town. The tensing of their muscles didn't come to an end until the door creaked shut and the bus hissed before pulling away, the two letting out a collective sigh of relief as they walked the well-lit streets of Upper Bludhaven.

"Sorry about the ride. I'd take you out in a car if I could, but Scooter's merchandise isn't exactly… clean," Virgil apologized as he tried to find the right words.

"No, no, it's alright," Athena waved off. "To be honest, I'd rather not be near anything my step-brother's had his hands on."

"Is his reputation really that bad?" Virgil felt the need to ask. Sure, the guy wasn't pretty to look at, and his hands looked like they hadn't been washed in a few days, or ever for that matter, but every person had to have their good points too.

"Trust me, if you saw the kind of calendars he has in his office, you'd know what I mean," the blond replied. "Uuugh… Why do boys have to be so gross?"

"So uh… No offense, but certain members of your family seem to be… um…"

"Country hicks?"

"I was going to say redneck, but that works too," the brunette conceded.

"Well, believe it or not, but Scooter and Ellie actually get that from our mom."

"Moxxi? Mad Moxxi? The woman who looks like something from a dirty magic show?" the brunette asked. "No offense."

"None taken, and you'd actually be quite surprised," Athena replied. "Catching mom falling back into her southern drawl is actually pretty enlightening. Really puts things in perspective."

"Hmmm… I can't imagine it," Virgil shrugged. He tried imagining southern drawl coming out of her mouth, but whenever he tried, his thoughts wandered off to her doing… other things, with that pretty mouth of hers. 'Dammit, I really need to get my mind out of the gutter…' he said to himself as he shook his head. 'Seriously, I'm on a date with a pretty girl but I'm thinking about her mom. How messed up is that?' he thought as he forced his thoughts away from... well... the obvious. "So… I thought we'd get a nice dinner at a diner in town, maybe hit up the theater to catch a movie. What do you say?"

"That sounds really nice," the blond replied. "In all honesty, I don't get out all that much, so this will probably be the most fun I've had in a while. I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm actually a bit of a recluse."

"What. Pshaw. You? Naw, there's no way," Virgil sputtered out nervously.

"Seriously, it's true?" Athena argued. "I honestly think this is the first time I've been out with a guy," she confessed, hugging herself to his side to avoid touching any passerby of the opposite gender. "I'm really not any good with boys."

"You seem to be doing fine with me."

"Well… That's because you're really easy to talk to. Plus… I feel really safe around you…" she trailed off in a whisper.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Nothing," she waved off. "So where are we heading?"

"Well… I was thinking Hogan's Alley," Virgil answered. "Even if someone with a gun does try demanding money or whatever, there should be about a dozen guys with firearms and Kevlar with something to say about that."

"Sounds like a very safe choice," Athena conceded as she nervously pat her pocket.

Right before they left, her mother pulled her aside and quickly slipped a .40 S&W Beretta Nano into her pocket, saying if anything went wrong, she'd call the cops and take the heat for giving a firearm to a minor. Given the classy reputation that Bludhaven had, the BPD were actually pretty lenient when it came to gun control laws and women who could become targets. As opposed to Gotham which was still clinging to its glory days while the rest of the world left them behind, at the very least, Bludhaven was getting with the program and changing with the times.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

Despite the police cruisers parked out front, or the officers-in-uniform flanking the door and waiting in the corners, Hogan's Alley had a pretty upbeat atmosphere about it. There were a mix of people from all walks of life present, young, middle-aged, and old, some alone, some with families enjoying coffee or dinner. The place looked like any other American diner, harkening to a much simpler time, just without the racist, sexist, or religiousist undertones that the people of the present would rather leave behind.

It wasn't perfect, of course. There were still a couple shady characters here and there. However, with the police presence nearby, it was obvious why they were all behaving.

"So, what looks good?" Virgil asked as he and Athena sat across from one another in a booth by the window, laminated menus in hand.

"Not sure. I don't really get out all that much," the pretty blond admitted as she tuned everyone out. With police nearby, she didn't have to worry about anyone trying to try anything with her.

"Hmm… I guess I'll go with the Philly Cheesesteak," Virgil hummed, his stomach rumbling as he looked at the appetizing example on the picture. "I'm paying, so feel free to order whatever you want."

"Oh, you don't have to do that. I've got money on my own, we can split the tab," the blond countered.

"Please, I insist. It's the least I can do for taking you out of your comfort zone like this."

"Well… At the very least, let me pay for the drinks and popcorn at the theater."

"After living with your family, I know better than to argue with a woman who knows what she wants," Virgil conceded, a waitress coming up to them a few moments later.

"Good evening, you two. Are you ready to order?" the woman asked.

"I guess I'll have a diet coke and the grilled cheese," Athena started. "With ham."

"I'll have a milk and the Philly Cheesesteak," Virgil added. "Extra cheese."

"What sides would you two like?"

"Fries," the two of them answered in tandem.

"Anything else?" the waitress asked.

"No, I think we're good," Athena answered.

"Alright then. I'll have your order out in a little while."

" . . . "

" . . ."

" . . . "

"So… How are things?" Virgil asked nervously.

"Oh you know… Fine," Athena replied.

" . . . "

" . . . "

"Wow, I'm bad at this…" the brunette sighed.

"No no, you're doing fine. We're both new at this whole dating thing."

"Well, to be honest I tried to get dates in the past, but I always flubbed it up. That or the families I stayed with made things… difficult, for me."

"I've been meaning to ask, what happened to your parents?" Athena asked, remembering her date was in foster care.

"Our car got run off the road when I was a little kid. All I remember about it was waking up all roughed-up, and calling out every superhero name I knew after regaining consciousness. No one came... and since then I've had no love for SPBs and the like," he trailed off. "It's just, the whole illusion of them swooping in and saving everyone at the last moment was ruined for me. I've been jaded about the topic ever since."

"That must've been really difficult," Athena realized as the brunette's eyes became downcast. "Thank you… for opening up to me," she said reaching out and taking his hands.

"I figured I should tell someone in the house who I am. Where I come from. The whole mysterious stranger thing could only hold up for so long." There wasn't anything he could do about them seeing the Nanosuit before Re-l got to him, but at the least no-one had said anything to put him in a compromising position.

" . . . Are there any superheroes you like?" she felt the need to ask. "I mean... There has to be more to it than one-sided hate."

"Well…" he hummed with a sigh, mulling the question over in his head. "I guess it'd have to be Black Canary. If I had to say."

"Really? And why her?" she asked quirking an eyebrow. Most "guys" chose Batman because of the scare-factor the guy carried, or Superman because of the raw power under his belt. When the topic of favorite heroes came up, people were usually gender-centric.

"Her identity as Dinah Lance is known to the public, for one, and when she got her powers is well-known too," Virgil answered. Dinah Lance aka Black Canary, was the daughter of the original Black Canary who was born in 1943, and gave birth to the present iteration in 1986. Dinah Lance, as opposed to her mother who never developed any form of superpower, developed her Canary Cry in the first grade, in an accident which almost deafened her class. After that, she supposedly attempted a vow of silence, before deciding to train with her gift among the now-retired members of the Justice Society of America, making her debut as a hero in 2007, before being granted admittance to the Justice League in 2008. "She just seems more… human to me, knowing that about her," he added at the end.

"You think people with powers aren't human?" Athena asked nervously.

"Not like that. I know that they are human, regardless of any differences in their DNA that separate them from textbook Homo Sapiens. I'm just saying that most of the Capes in the League… There's this something that separates them from "regular" people," he said making air-quotes, "but knowing their name, where they come from, both literally and metaphorically… Knowing that is what makes me able to connect to her on a fundamental level," Virgil answered as he twitted his thumbs. "Also, she isn't a total bullshit OP like Superman is."

"What about beings like Martian Manhunter? Or Wonder Woman?" she queried, naming a couple of heroes who, similar to Superman, have provided certain media outlets with abridged versions of their backstories, as opposed to heroes like Batman who never interacted with the media in any direct fashion. There were entire websites dedicated to Batman and Batman alone; mostly fan-theories about whether or not he's a Vampire, a Dhamir, some kinda Cyborg, Android, or something in-between, as well as discussions about who pays for all the gear he's seen using.

"Martain Manhunter is a known shapeshifter. Maybe he looks as-human as he does just so we're remotely comfortable around him, while in actuality he's like something from an H.P. Lovecraft novel," Virgil answered. He was going to say "something from Dead Space", but the reference might be lost on her, given he hasn't seen a single video game console in the house, and Tina didn't seem the sort. "As for Wonder Woman… I don't really know if she's the same Wonder Woman who fought Hydra alongside Captain America like she claims, or if that's just a metaphor for her taking on the same mantle as the Amazon who did, but the… nature, of her outfit, makes me a little uneasy."

"From what I understand, the nature of her outfit's one of her selling points," Athena countered.

Every once in a while, superheroes from the Justice League would pose for posters of themselves in addition to other hero-centric memorabilia, which was trademarked through the Justice League's PR office for sanctioned use of their image. Due to the "sensual" nature of certain members, intended or not, posters depicting female League members always sold in greater quantities than their more-masculine peers.

While "B-Rate heroes" also sold memorabilia, that was to get by or fund their exploits, while the Justice League was non-profit due to funding from a single or multiple unknown backers. Because the Justice League was a household name after the Appellaxian invasion, they were able to garner a fan-base worldwide, whereas the "B-Rate heroes" who actively tried to gain membership into the League for the booster shot it'd give to their careers were susceptible to the same rises and falls in popularity as all trends are. Most washed out after a couple years, retired due to injury, or were killed in one way or another (with cape-related deaths being the most-common), but a few names like Kangaroo Kommando or Captain Nemesis managed to stay relevant despite never making it into the "big leagues".

Whether it was due to contentment or the Justice League's stringent screening process, she wasn't sure.

"Yes, well, two of my foster parents were hardcore lesbians, so I view women less-objectively than some of the hormone-driven guys you'll find on the street," he said jerking his head to a couple heavily making out in one of the corners, the male of the two playing grab-ass. No, seriously, the guy's hands were in the back of her pants getting a hand-full of ass. "Christ, get a room you two," he muttered under his breath.

"So based on the trend, you view most heroes with a perfectly reasonable amount of skepticism," Athena hummed as she crossed her arms. "What's your take on shows like The G. Gordon Godfrey Show or Harangue Nation?" she wondered, referring to shows where the hosts shared a similar mindset regarding the credibility of superheroes. Usually in loud and/or bombastic ways.

"Well… The both of them are loud, sometimes obnoxious TV pundits… But at least Godfrey is classy about it, Harangue just likes to talk for the sake of talking," Virgil answered. "And it isn't like Godfrey puts a magnifying glass to superheroes twenty-four-seven, three-sixty-five. The guy also grills celebrities, law enforcement, and politicians when everyone else thinks they're sunshine and rainbows. If I didn't know any better, I'd say Harangue has some kind of inferiority complex. Whether it's to Godfrey or superheroes in general, I don't have a clue."

"And you share their opinions?"

"Not all of them, but at the very least I can get behind some of what they're saying," the brunette answered. "Do you think any less of me for following guys like that?"

"No, of course not. Everyone's entitled to their own opinions, and when it comes to superheroes, there are no right answers. Heck, even to this day, Captain America is a huge source of controversy because people wonder whether or not he was a vigilante from the start and everyone just rolled with it because having a super-soldier fighting the Nazis was convenient," Athena responded.

She was of course, recalling how Steven "Steve" Grant Rogers, after the now-declassified Project Rebirth gave him his powers, essentially went AWOL in order to raid a HYDRA base in Italy that most would've thought unassailable. You see, instead of first serving overseas to help tip the scales in favor of the Allies, he was instead made to promote war bonds for the Treasury Department and encourage American participation in the war as the icon known as "Captain America". Whether it be from his tour of the nation with dancing showgirls where he'd "knock out" Hitler at the end, or his starring role in his own lines of comics and movie serials where he'd fight and defeat the Nazis, Steve Rogers obviously grew dissatisfied with his role as a "dancing monkey" and essentially went AWOL in order to raid his first HYDRA P.O.W.; something which elevated him from icon to a legend (in-the-making) after saving dozens of fathers and husbands.

Since it was either be a "lab rat" or a "dancing monkey", Steve didn't have a whole lot of options laid out for him, hence why a fairly large margin thought him to be the start of modern vigilantism, since he blatantly ignored the established command structure at that key moment in what most would describe as an act of vigilantism. There was also controversy on whether his early career was better-spent promoting war bonds, or if it would've been better putting him in a lab to re-create Abraham Erskine's super-soldier serum, but that was a whole different kettle of fish altogether.

"Good. Glad to know not every girl I tried dating isn't into the whole hero-worship thing," Virgil sighed. "To be honest, when other girls found out about my dislike of Capes, it was kind of a deal-breaker for them."

"Well it's their loss. I think you're a great guy."

"And you're a better girl than I deserve," he said as he glanced down at the hands she was holding. Hands that had blood on them, even though it'd long-since been washed away. That he could fall asleep with someone else's blood on their face showed there was something seriously wrong with him, at least if you used a "normal" person as a benchmark. 'I just hope that if things do go beyond this first date, I can keep this… festering darkness, away from her.'

"Here are your drinks. Your food will be out in a few minutes. Sorry for the wait," the waitress apologized.

"No need to apologize," Virgil waved off, Athena nodding her head to the woman before she walked off.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

The rest of their meal was largely uneventful, the two teens having to scramble a little at the end so they could catch the next bus in time for the date's centerfold. The multiplex in Bludhaven was pretty impressive, a dozen theaters showing movies almost around-the-clock, and while Bludhaven had a less-than-savory repute due to its criminal elements, the venue itself was impressively clean and tastefully decorated. Of course, this may've been because they had actual security guards on-site instead of rent-a-cops.

Of course, Virgil had more-important things to worry about, like his date.

The two briefly split ways after buying tickets, Athena heading off to the snack line while Virgil went off to grab some seats. Seeing it half-full, his mind briefly drifted back to one of the closer calls he'd had in the Red Zone alongside Dana, where the two of them had to lose a pack of Infected by cutting through a movie theater and vaulting over countless rows of seats before circling back around to the emergency exit and barricading it shut. The only thing that gave them the time they needed was that the Infected became tangled up by the movie seats' confounding nature to being crawled over.

"Virgil, are you okay?"

"Wha-What?" Virgil blinked, the blood-stains on the walls and floor disappearing as he came back to reality. "Ah, sorry, just spaced out for a moment."

"It looked a bit more profound than that," Athena replied, a large soda and popcorn cradled in her arms, with an assortment of candy bars sticking up out of the popcorn. "Are you feeling alright?"

"Yeah, fine, just a small thing," Virgil returned as he looked up at the stands. "I found us a good set of seats."

"Alright..." Athena replied as they ascended to the steps, working their way into a set of seats three-fourths of the way back in the middle of the row. Settling themselves in for the last of the previews, the two teens glanced at one another and then to the screen, shifting in their seats as the lights began to dim, and the movie play.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

Despite the awkwardness before they were even seated, the rest of their evening went off without a hitch.

Athena's movie of choice for the evening, Zombieland, was a Zombie Comedy Film where the four protagonists Tallahasse, Columbus, Wichita, and Little Rock, all had to make their way through a post-apocalyptic world after a mutated strain of mad cow disease became "mad person disease", before upgrading into full blown "mad zombie disease". Scattered throughout the film were Rules which would make your time in a zombie apocalypse easier, and while some of them seemed a little silly, contextually-speaking, some of them were actually pretty sound. At least if Virgil's experience on the topic was anything to go by, but just because he opened up about foster care didn't mean he was going to open up about his time in Hell anytime soon.

"That was a fun movie," Athena said with a smile on her face, hand-in-hand with her date as they made their way out the lobby.

"Ooooogh... Too much popcorn," Virgil groaned, a hand to his stomach.

"Ah, are you alright?" the blond asked worriedly.

"Yes, yes I'm fine. My stomach just wasn't expecting so much artificial butter in one go," the brunette replied. Something about lazily sitting in a theater and watching a movie, had caused him to go into Auto Mode and continually pick at popped kernels of artificially-flavored corn until the well had run dry. Of course, Athena was in the same place as him, but apparently she could handle the processed butter better.

"We can sit down if you want."

"Maybe a trip to the restroom would be better," Virgil hummed.

"I'll go too. We can meet back up by the Zombieland posters when we're finished," the girl replied.

"Sounds like a plan."

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

Artificial butter now flushed from his system, Virgil and Athena reconvened by the posters, the brunette managing to grab the last one for the evening by one miracle or another.

"You want the poster?" Virgil asked.

"That's sweet, but my mom doesn't let me put up posters in my room anymore," Athena replied. "Something about "unnecessary flammable materials in the work environment" or something," she said making air-quotes. "But you're free to put it up in your room as long as you're staying. With all the money you've been putting in when you thought no-one was looking, it's the least we can do."

"Wait, you know about that?"

"Of course. Who do you think does mom's taxes?"

"That doesn't really explain how you knew."

"Oh, I installed a couple cameras around the tip jar to keep track of who puts how much in, and if anyone tries to take anything out other than my mom."

"And if someone does try to wet their beak?"

"We put the footage on YouTube and destroy them on social media."

"Heh. Nice."

"Why thank you," the blond said with a faux-curtsy.

"So... Did you have a good time?"

"A good time? No... I had a great time."

"Oh. Good. I was a little nervous for a second," Virgil said scratching at his cheek, Athena's right hand going to his face.

"This scar... Was it from the car accident?" she asked as her thumb stroked his left cheekbone.

"That and a couple others, but my mom had me bundle up that day, so it was just some light cuts and bruises," Virgil replied. Whether it be from a concussion or the trauma, a lot of the familial memories he had of his mother and father had just... vanished. One time when foster care shelled out to send him to a shrink, when he confided that the faces of his mother and father were now blurred-out in his memory, the doctor theorized that it was a way of his mind distancing himself from the painful memories of losing them in order to cope.

"So... What do you think of Bludhaven so far?"

"It's okay," Virgil shrugged. "Some of the city itself makes my skin crawl, but the people are nice, and I hope I stick around for a long time," he said turning to her.

"Yeah... I do too," Athena replied with a soft smile on her face. The moment between them was sweet and tender... until the two of them walked face-first into the double doors, eliciting chuckles from passerby.

"Let... Let me get that," Virgil said awkwardly as he opened the doors, letting Athena through. The blond shivering in the cold, she buttoned up her laptop, rubbing her hands together. Call it cheesy, but Virgi chose that moment to take off his hoodie and drape it over her shoulders.

"Y-You don't have to do that, I'm fine, really."

"Hey, don't worry about it. I'm used to a little cold," Vigil waved off rubbing his arms.

"Do you need more blankets? Mom can get you more blankets if you're cold!" Athena said worriedly.

"No, no, I'm not used to it from here. When I lived in New York, I just had to get a little used to it when the heat was out," Virgil answered.

Of course, he didn't say which part of New York he'd gotten used to sleeping in the cold in. Just like he didn't say he'd gotten used to the cold by huddling up with Dana in the same cot to share body heat during the cold Red Zone nights.

Not naked of course! That rule only applied when both parties' clothes were wet and needed to dry.

And the only reason they did it was because using a heater at night would light them up like the Forth of July to Blackwatch's infared if they ever did a sweep of the area via chopper.

She was the big spoon.

"Okay... But you'll tell me if you need blankets, right?"

"Of course I will," Virgil said patting her shoulder, the girl reaching up and taking his hand. A blush forming on their cheeks at the proximity, Athena tentatively leaned towards him, lips puckered. Virgil slowly leaned forward as well, but movement out the corner of his eye caused him to lurch to a halt, their foreheads bumping together while also killing the moment. "Oh what fresh hell is this?" he asked glaring over his shoulder.

Hobbling out of the alley like he'd gone a couple of rounds with Mike Tyson was some sickly-ass looking mother fucker. His hair was messed up and ratty, his clothes a mess, his hands filthy, and his bloodshot eyes had bags under them. His eyes were darting about in all directions and he was muttering to himself, hands shaking.

"I am here for it…" the crazed-looking guy muttered in their direction.

" . . . For what?" Virgil asked the drug-fiend, slowly placing himself between the guy and Athena.

"Dragon…ball… I need… that… dragonball… Give it to me… the one you took… need my wish…"

"Is he okay?" Athena asked worriedly from behind him.

"The guy's a drug-fiend. Does he look okay?"

"Shut up ghost of Nappa!" the drug-fiend suddenly shouted.

"What the fuck?"

"I'm not crazy! You're crazy! Especially you Nappa!"

"Who is this guy talking to?" Athena asked, her hands scrambling to her pocket.

"Who knows. Probably a figment of his imagination."

"Dragonball… hand now please…"

"Um… we don't… have it," Athena said nervously, a blood vessel in the drug-fiend's right eye suddenly bursting, coloring his sclera bright red.

" . . . Imma fucking kill ya!" he shouted, clumsily brandishing a switchblade from his pocket.

"Athena get back!" Virgil shouted as the guy lunged at them with an overhead stab.

A momentary burst of adrenaline hitting his system, he world slowed. Rolled-up poster in hand, Virgil batted the sloppy strike to the side before jabbing the guy in the throat, the crinkling of paper exploding in his ears as the drug-fiend staggered backward. Quickly folding it in half, he proceeded to jab the guy in the eyes, staggering him backward into the foot snaked around his instep. The guy tumbling backwards, Virgil curb-stomped the guy in the nuts, heel-fist, though based on the guy's face, the hit didn't even register.

"Someone call nine-one-one!" Virgil shouted as the guy scrambled backward and got back to his feet like something out of Night of the Living Dead. The drug-fiend throwing his knife, Virgil dodged to the side, mentally patting himself on the back only for a shrill- "Eyah!" -to meet his his ears a moment later. 'What was that-' the brunette wondered as he glanced over his shoulder, 'noise...?'

At that moment the world stopped in its tracks, Virgil's eyes going wide as Athena clutched her now-bleeding hand to her chest, the thrown knife clattering to the ground. Realizing that the tears in her eyes, the pain running up her arm was his fault, a white-hot fury with all the force of a nuclear bomb exploded behind his eyes, and the mercenary saw red.

The brunette surged forward, a murderous snarl drawn across his features, his footsteps thundering in his ears as, sans Athena, the gathering crowd became shadowed in his mind. The drug-fiend sloppily raising his arms like a boxer, Virgil clapped his hands together and threaded the needle, parting the guy's arms like the Red Sea. A heel-palm strike to the stomach with his left hand a moment later, Virgil grabbed a fistful of the guy's hair with his right and brought it down into his knee. A loud *CRUNCH* rang through the air as cartridge crumpled and blood stained his pant leg, but Virgil wasn't finished yet.

Hands fisting the front of the guy's shirt before he could reel too far back, Virgil pulled the guy into a brutal headbutt, his forehead impacting the guy's nose causing a loud *SQUELCH* to ring in his ears. Blood dribbling down his face, the red-eyed merc ignored it as the guy's hands moved up to cover his completely-destroyed nose. Coiling the muscles up and down his arm, the brunette twisted at the waist before delivering a right corkscrew body blow, catching the guy in the ribs and causing him to wheeze like a stomped-out beach ball.

"The Dragon... Ball," the guy muttered. "I... need... that Dragon Ball. Give it to me. The one you took. I need my wish!"

'My rage is now broken!' Virgil snarled as he was forced to listen to the endless fountain of bullshit spewing from the guy's mouth. Reaching into the alley and grabbing the lid off a nearby trashcan, he spun the metal disc in his hands before holding it up. "You want your Dragon Ball? I got it right here!"

Whatever the guy was tripped out on, it caused him to see exactly what he was looking for in that trashcan lid. Because the moment Virgil held it out, the guy shambled toward it like parched-man in the desert grasping for water. One "shield bash" and the guy's head bounced backward like a bobble head, falling onto his ass with a glazed look in his eye. One Captain America "shield throw" later and the guy was out cold from the blow to the forehead, laid out flat like a wet sock.

*Woop-Woop*

"Shit..."

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

Between the blood dribbling down his face and the knocked-out pot-head with the completely-destroyed nose laid out on the pavement, it was easy to understand just why Virgil was the one with the guns pointed at him the moment the police showed up.

It was fortunate for the brunette, that not only Athena, but half a dozen other bystanders came to his defense. Almost everyone pointed fingers at the drug-fiend laid out on the ground, paramedics arriving a minute later. Virgil had to practically beat them off with a ten-foot pole so they'd quit pestering him and tend to Athena's actual wound, despite the fact that his face, shirt, sleeves, and right pant leg were covered in blood.

After the drug-fiend got hauled away in an ambulance, the two arresting officers chatted on their radios, asking what to do next. It was to the two teen's surprise that they were asked to come to HQ to make their statement, instead of right there. From that point, the two were quickly ushered into an interrogation room in the back, passerby wondering why the guy covered in blood wasn't in handcuffs like everybody else. Who was covered in blood.

Suffice it to say, the ideal evening out they'd been aiming towards had ended in complete disaster.

As such, the two tried to salvage it however they could. However, between the dreary nature of the interrogation room at the back of the precinct, the overhead lighting that only covered part of the room directly underneath it, and the plate of half-stale donuts meant to placate them in some way, that was proving easier said than done.

'Well... This evening fucking blows,' Virgil groaned as he drummed his fingers on the table.

'How'd these even survive?' Athena wondered as she looked at the now-unappetizing pastries. "Virgil?"

"Yes?"

"What do you think's gonna happen to us?" she asked nervously.

"Well for one reason or another, they decided to take our statement here. Not sure why they did that, but the fact is, unless one of us is being accused of anything, they can't legally hold us here against our will." Seeing his date was still nervous, he reached out and took her hand. "Everything will be fine, so don't worry, okay?"

"O-Okay…" Athena returned as she squeezed his hand.

"I hope the two of you have made yourselves comfortable," a third voice said, causing the two to nearly jump out of their skin, their hands fly apart. Virgil glanced up at the door, his eyes going a little wide; both in respect, and a healthy dosage of fear from the vibe the man was giving off.

Walking in was a fairly tall athletic man with wavy shoulder-length black hair that was tied back, two lochs framing his face. Between his arcing eyebrows and intense black eyes, he was young and attractive-looking enough that he must've been called a "pretty boy" during his time as a Rookie. Instead of the typical BPD uniform, his attire consisted of a white shirt with fancy cuffs, a white scarf, a gray pullover jacket, tight black pants, and polished dress shoes, all of which was covered by a black longcoat. The fashionable nature of his outfit made him seem more home at the opera house, rather than working hardcore case files.

Though he'd never met the man in person, Virgil immediately recognized him from what he'd seen on the news, and what Moxxi had told him. One of the most-dangerous, and most intimidating people in all of Bludhaven, his presence on par with crime lords and the like; Police Commissioner Raul Creed.

That and his hair made him look a bit like Steven Segal, but that's neither here nor there.

"You two obviously know who I am," he opened up with a cold voice filled with authority. "If you answer my questions quickly and honestly, then things will go smoothly, and I'll let the two of you be on your way."

"Yes, sir," the two replied, Virgil wondering why Bludhaven's badass equivalent to Gotham's Jim Gordon was the one taking their statement. Obviously, the man was busy keeping Bludhaven's criminal element in line, though how Hotel Moscow fit into the picture he didn't know. It struck Virgil as a bit odd that the top dog himself was present, instead of anyone else.

"As I've been led to understand, the two of you had just finished your date when the attack happened," he said with a small case file in hand. "In your own words, please state for the record what happened outside the theater," he said putting down a recorder, pressing the red circle.

"Well..." Virgil swallowed nervously as he gathered his thoughts. "The two of us had just finished our movie, and we were about to make our way home. Before we could get to the bus stop, I saw movement out of the corner of my eye, and a guy with messy hair and ratty clothing shuffled out from behind the theater. To be honest, the guy looked as shaky and feral as the extras from Zombieland, just... you know... without the rotting."

"I see. Continue," Raul said with a nod.

"It was clear that he was on drugs from the shakes and the redness in his eyes, but what really drove the point home was his crazed ramblings," the brunette continued.

"And what were his words?"

"He demanded we give him the Dragon Balls before telling a ghost to shut up," Athena stated.

"I see," Creed hummed, drumming his fingers together. "He must've been hallucinating, believing himself to be within the fictional works of Akira Toriyama," he stated, Virgil arcing a brow in surprise that the man even knew where the reference had come from. "Continue."

"After he demanded we hand over the Dragon Ball, we told him we didn't have it. One of his blood vessels burst, before he pulled out a switchblade and attacked us," Virgil said thinking back. Whether it was the DNA Computer in his brain, or his own mental acuity, he remembered most of it in perfect detail. "I pushed Athena back, and slapped aside a sloppy knife-strike with a rolled-up poster. I knocked him back and told Athena to call 911, but the druggie managed to recover and hit her hands. I should've kicked the knife away the moment he was down," he said as he interlaced his fingers, a knuckle-whitening grip forming. "The paramedics told me it was just a scratch after they cleaned and dressed her wounds, but... it still tears me up inside that this happened on my watch."

"Mistakes happen. Just count yourself lucky it was only a flesh wound," Creed stated as Athena placed her hand atop his own. "Continue."

"After that... I saw red, and I laid into him," Virgil admitted. "I'm not sure if it was the drugs, or the guy had the opposite of a glass jaw, but he got back in my face, and I had to use some martial arts I'd started learning to defend myself."

"From the accident report, the bruising on the body was consistent with military close quarters combat - CQC. Is that correct?"

"Yes, it is," Virgil replied. Raul Creed was the youngest police commissioner in Bludhaven's history at the age of 28, having earned the position due to his intelligence, cunning, and strong adherence to justice. With his doctorate in criminology, master detective skills, and training in hand-to-hand combat, it wouldn't surprise him if the man did identify the style he used based on the bruises. "Did you identify it from he bruises?"

"Yes. That, and..." he said pulling out his phone. "Someone in the crowd recorded the whole thing," he said showing a shaky picture of the attack, recorded from Virgil's right flank. This caused the brunette to stiffen, since media exposure in any form was the last thing he wanted.

"I... see..." Virgil stated, hoping that Otacon would be able to remove the video from the bulk of the internet. Fashion magazines were one thing; with his hair and makeup done-up by an expert, you could barely recognize him. However, the video clearly showed his face, and what kind of training he had. It made him really uncomfortable.

"Don't worry, it was a clear case of self-defense. Unfortunately, as of late, people being attacked by people like this has become a growing problem. One we fully intend to resolve before this blight can spread any further," the man said interlacing his fingers, a stern expression on his face.

"Commissioner. If I might ask... Just how bad have things gotten?" Virgil asked. "Off-the-record, of course."

The man looked at him, the brunette doing his best not to shrink back in his chair. After a few moments, the man shut off the recorder, letting out a tired sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair.

"Tests on the subject confirm that he was hopped up on a new street drug known as Vertigo, a highly-addictive hallucinogen that originated in Star City before Count Vertigo left to escape the reach of the Green Arrow," the man answered. "In small doses, it causes a high that makes the person feel "floaty", and since you had the nerve to ask me directly, all I can really tell you is that fifty-six people died before the present version became available to the public," he said pulling out a small evidence bag from his pocket, a trio of black-and-green pills sitting in the bottom. "These small doses become larger as each person builds tolerance to the drug, with higher doses causing the users to become increasingly unstable. The guy who attacked you must've been popping these things like Dr. Mario for him to have gotten that bad."

"Nasty," the brunette shuddered. He was also impressed that the guy knew the reference. Maybe he had a kid at home?

"Given more than fifty people died while it was still in the beta stage, "nasty" is not the word I would use," Creed stated with a frown. Rising in his seat, Athena tensed up next to Virgil, grabbing onto his arm. "I think we have everything we need to make a full accident report. I'd recommend the two of you be cautious until the problem is dealt with."

"Yes, sir," the two teen returned.

"Alright. I'll ask that you sign a few papers at the front desk before you leave. Do you want one of my officers to drive you home?"

Virgil looked over his shoulder to look at his date. After seeing the shaken look on her face, he took her hand before turning back to the police commissioner. "That would be appreciated. Thank you."

"No need for thanks. Keeping people safe is part of the job description," the man returned as Virgil stepped toward the door. "Oh, and one more thing."

"Yes, sir?"

"Tell Moxxi and Balalaika I said hello," he instructed right as he ushered the brunette out of the room and headed the opposite way from the front desk.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

That evening, when Virgil and Athena got home late in a police car of all things, Moxxi fussed over her daughter to no end, while Shaula grilled Virgil for everything he was worth, the athletic girl especially hard on him because Athena's right hand was in bandages. The two were interrogated separately, but their stories matched up, so other than being really worried about them and telling them not to leave the house for a couple of days, everything went really well all things considered.

"So it was one of those Vertigo drug-fiends, huh? Guess he overdosed or something," the dark-haired girl huffed, she and Virgil now sitting on the couch in the living room.

"Guy looked pretty fucked-up in the head. I'm guessing Vertigo's the latest drug-craze?" Virgil asked.

"Yeah. Rolled into town a couple months ago."

"Any idea who makes it?"

"Don't know a name, but the guy calls himself Count Vertigo, on account of how the people who got the first-ever dosages put it into their necks with two syringes," Shaula huffed.

"Like Dracula?" Virgil said aloud. 'It'd explain the marks on their necks, now that I think about it,' he hummed as he thought back to all the dead bodies he came across a while back. "Any idea where he's based out of?"

"None. Why do you want to know?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Just curious," Virgil returned. However, the girl to his right leveled him a glare, and he caved. "Alright, fine… I want to give the guy a piece of my mind. All those dead bodies really cheese me off, and Athena looked really scared today. I am not a big fan of the guy's work."

"Don't do anything stupid. That guy's got the money to hire lots of muscle. You'd be better off leaving it up to the cops. At least this isn't like Gotham and its revolving-door prisons. As soon as Creed gets his claws into Count Vertigo, I doubt we'll be seeing him again."

"I guess so," Virgil shrugged.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

"Hey Moxxi, cleaning up for the night?" Virgil asked a few hours later.

"Yeah, just made last call," she said jabbing a thumb over her shoulder to a heavily-intoxicated man who was hobbling out the front door.

"Need a hand?"

"Aw. Well aren't you sweet?" the woman cooed as she gave Virgil's cheek a pinch, putting a spray bottle and a rag in his hand. "You can start by wiping down the tables. I've got the counter."

"Sure thing," Virgil nodded, taking the supplies and getting to work at the nearest one. "Hey Mox'..." he said a few minutes later. "I'm... really sorry, for what happened this evening. What almost happened to your daughter, it shouldn't have happened. Not when I was right next to her."

"It's not your fault, sug'. No one could've predicted a random guy high on drugs. I'm just glad you were able to keep her safe, most guys in Bludhaven would've cut their losses and run."

"Yeah, well, I'm just glad I started taking those lessons," Virgil said as he rubbed the phantom aches across his body.

"You're a lucky boy. Finding a good Systema teacher is hard, and Balalaika rarely opens up to outsiders anymore. Especially after what happened to Madripoor," she whispered that last part to herself. "Anyway, how was your first meeting with Creed?"

"The guy's intense, I'll tell you that much. He's very direct, and he's got an aura of authority about him," Virgil answered. 'Huh... She assumes I used Systema on the guy. Well, no need to correct her, I suppose.'

"Well, you've walked the streets. You gotta be tough to be the police commissioner around here," Moxxi said as she cleaned the taps. "The Bat may have stealth and intimidation, but Creed actually keeps the super-criminals out of this town."

"Good. That's one less super-powered problem to put up with," Virgil said to a nod as he wiped down a couple more tables. "I have to ask though... What's his connection to Balalaika? He told me to tell her he said "Hello" right as I was leaving."

"Best way to put it is... they have respect for one another," Moxxi answered, causing Virgil to raise an eyebrow. "While Creed would gladly see the lot of Hotel Moscow behind bars, he respects her for keeping the lesser criminals out of Bludhaven, as well as her strength as a soldier. As for Balalaika, she respects Creed's control over his own forces to keep them from going crooked, and how he's able to control the crime-rate in this town without wearing a mask."

"Speaking of which, how did he keep super-criminals out?" Virgil wondered. "In places like Metropolis, or Gotham, usually law enforcement is up shit creek without a paddle until the Capes show up to pull their asses out of the fire."

"Funny story about that. You see, a couple years back, some caped criminal tried to rob a bank in Bludhaven. Creed happened to be making a deposit with his little girl next to him, so he shot the guy in the head before he could hurt anyone with whatever high-tech ray-gun he was packing," Moxxi explained. "The news asked him about it, and he said the BPD didn't have any time for "B.S.". A little while later, he was able to get city hall to let him give kill-on-sight orders for any costumed yahoos committing any crimes in this town. Since then, the only caped criminals coming into Bludhaven are the idiots with a death wish, and the millions that would've been spent in supervillain-related reconstruction could be directed elsewhere."

"Geez, why aren't more places like that?" Virgil wondered aloud. "And Balalaika? How'd she earn his respect?"

"Eh, story's not as fancy as Creed's," Moxxi shrugged. "Some drug-peddler was selling drugs to kids in her territory, so she "supposedly"," she said making air-quotes, "shot him in the head and tossed him into the river."

"Huh... Good for her," Virgil hummed. Maybe it was his time in the Red Zone, but casually hearing about people getting their brains blown out and dumped into the river didn't really bother him that much anymore. Like, at all.

"Yes, well, the two of them are similar in that they actually get results," the buxom woman replied.

"Results... Yeah. Results are pretty important," Virgil hummed as he contemplated his next course of action. Was he really willing to use his connection to a military black ops group to take the fight to a local drug lord just because one of his junkies ruined his first actual date with a girl?

Yes. Yes he was.

*VERTIGO: THE TUMOR*

The start of what I think will be a two-part arc. The title of this chapter "The Disease" is meant to mesh with the next one. Suffice it to say, even on his off-days, "Virgil" and "normal" don't belong in the same sentence.*

I know this chapter's been a long time coming, wish I could've come out with it sooner, but real life happens. Stuff doesn't happen on a "villain of the week" basis like on TV. Anyway, I hope you liked it, and that you leave lots of Reviews.

*AMENDMENT: Originally labeled as "Vertigo: The Disease", this chapter has now been re-named "Vertigo: The Tumor". Also, instead of being a two-part Arc, it will now be moved up to a three-part for better pacing.