superpierce: First of all love the rush hour refference. Who is House? Also great humour in this chapter you really know how to bring out the funnies.
NeoNazo356: The House, aka "Weasel" aka Jack Hammer, is a friend, sidekick, information broker, and arms dealer to "The Merc With a Mouth", Deadpool.
Deadpool: Did someone say "Deadpool"?
NeoNazo356: Back off! Wade! I have a Continuity Stone and I'm not afraid to use it!
Deadpool: Fine. I'll just wait for my next big appearance. Friggin' spoilsport.
NeoNazo356: I heard that!
Deadpool: Woob, woob-woob-woob-woob!
NeoNazo356: As I was saying before we were so rudely interrupted, as the "all of those things" for "that guy", The House is a Las Vegas vigilante home to the Marvel Universe, making his first appearance as The House (read: "The House always wins!") in Deadpool Volume 2 Issue 23. Of course, because this isn't the Marvel continuity, there isn't any Deadpool-
Deadpool: Did someone say-
Cue - Pop Goes the Weasel
Deadpool: What the hell?
Curley: Woob, woob-woob-woob!
Deadpool: Oh gawd! He's as strong as ten bears!
NeoNazo356: As I was saying, since he-who-must-not-be-named didn't get into any time-travel shenanigans because of a malfunctioning Teleporter Belt, and because Jack Hammer isn't in the same age bracket as Peter Parker & Gwen Stacy in this continuity, after completing college, he went on to offer his services to casino owners in Earth-16H's version of Las Vegas, Nevada, which in DC's Earth-16H universe doesn't have any superhero coverage. Woof. That reply took a lot longer than I thought it would.
UndeadLord22: ...this has to be one of the randomly, funniest chapter ive read on this story.
Comparable to the Ghost Car arc, but still dope... When can we see Virgil again with da Crisis suit?
NeoNazo356: Well, he was technically on his vacation. Couldn't have it be all-action, all-the-time.
As for the next time he wears the Prototype Nanosuit/Protosuit... I don't know when that will happen, but Special Agent Washington will be making another appearance very soon. Relatively speaking.
LuckyShadowWolf: I have to say that the Rush Hour Cameo was perfect! I'm still laughing from it. Which brings me to my first question. Will Inspector's Lee and Carter be making any further appearances? Like say their French adventure? Or will Virgil be getting a Chinese little sister in the form of Suu for that matter? Anyways for my next question I have to ask why the switch to Oreos instead of Chocos for the Martians drug cookie craving? And finally a mostly non-serious question. Will Virgils visit to his cover jobs store and his new cashier friend have any relevance in future? Feel free to just say yes or no and leave it at that if you wish.
NeoNazo356: Well, they were in Vegas, so the Rush Hour 2 cameo just seemed too good to pass up.
As for Lee and Carter... I might have Virgil happen to be in Paris, France at the same time as them in Rush Hour 3 (3 years later), but other than being witness to all the craziness, I don't plan on him being involved with stopping the Triads since he has no business getting in Interpol's way. Suffice it to say, Virgil won't be getting involved in Soo-Yung Han's life. That's a very creative suggestion since Virgil has a bit of a "weak spot" for young girls in need of guidance, but he personally doesn't have any reason to get involved as it doesn't directly affect him.
As for the Oreos/Chocos thing, originally in the comics they were called "Oreos" (Justice League International Issue 8), but DC Comics had to retroactively change/retcon them from "Oreos" to "Chocos" because of a trademark violation to the Oreo Brand Name. However, since this story isn't monetized, I don't have to worry about trademark violations, hence why I use IRL brand names.
As for the cashier at the Las Vegas branch of Real Fashions' Gothic Renaissance... In all likelihood that'll be a one-off, since Virgil might opt to stay away from Las Vegas after all the weird-and-wacky shit that happened on his VACATION. Given he was nuked like a microwave burrito, you can probably understand why what was supposed to be a relaxing vacation failed to meet expectations.
Supreme King of All Kings: respect for putting Rush Hour in there.
NeoNazo356: Thanks. Even though it was passively included, I thought I might be able to do it… justice.
Deadpool: Booo! Dad joke!
NeoNazo356: Continuity! Stone!
Deadpool: Alright, alright, I'm leaving for real this time. Sheesh!
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
Las Vegas, Nevada: Bellagio Hotel
November 19, 6:35 PT
"Mordecai… What the hell am I looking at?" Virgil asked the next morning, staring at a large RV when he should've been looking at the cabs that would've taken them back to the airport when they decided to depart from Vegas. Roland and Lilith were adjusting the seats in the front, with Brick piling all their luggage and loot into the storage compartment in the side.
"You're looking at my brand spanking new RV!" the skinny man whooped, Bloodwing sitting atop it and screeching proudly atop her roost, frightening passerby as she proceeded to rip into someone's rat-dog-thing that'd been left unattended.
"Okay. Allow me to reiterate. Why the hell am I looking at an RV?" he reiterated, giving the shiny steel-gray RV a once-over.
"I won this bad boy in a poker game last night, thought we'd take it for a spin all the way home~"
"Road house!" Brick whooped.
"So… we're just throwing away perfectly-good plane tickets back home?" Virgil asked, brow twitching.
"Hey, someone's gonna have to drive this thing home, and the way I see it, nothing wrong with sticking together," Roland nodded.
"And besides," Lilith said somersaulting out of the window and putting a hand on his shoulder, "now we'll have all the time in the world to squeeze that little confession out of you that you owe us."
"Oh crap…" Virgil groaned.
"VIRGIL!" a voice cried from the lobby.
"Zatanna? Megan?" he spoke as the two girls rushed out to meet him, their guardians trailing behind them.
"Virgil, do you really have to leave so soon?" Zatanna asked.
With he RV and the luggage, it wasn't too hard to figure out they were leaving.
As for how they found out… He'd just assume M'gann caught one of the adult's surface thoughts and told Zatanna.
"This is my fault, isn't it?" M'gann asked, her eyes drooping sadly.
"No, no, it isn't anything you did," Virgil said to assuage them. "Those two lovebirds had a crazy Vegas wedding, and they kinda burned through our operation's budget, so we can't really stay here that much longer. And still have enough money for gas," he muttered. "And no offense, but after the two days I've had, I'm actually kinda sick of Vegas. None of this is your fault."
"Oh, I see," M'gann nodded, still not sounding convinced.
"Hey, chin up, okay?" he asked tilting her head up. "Now c'mon, let's exchange numbers so we can stay in touch," he said, phone held up.
" . . . Yeah!" M'gann nodded, the two swapping phones and putting in their contact info. "You'll let me know when you make it home, right? I'd be worried sick if you don't."
"Don't worry, if anything happens, I'll let you two know," Virgil returned. "Now c'mon, where's that Hello, Megan smile you're so fond of? It's better to get sent off with one of those instead of a frown, don't you think?"
At this, M'gann bashfully quirked the corners of her lips upwards, before bringing out her best megawatt smile.
"Ah! There it is!" Virgil returned, a smile of his own causing M'gann's mood to brighten.
"Oh! I almost forgot!" Zatanna said digging into her pocket before pulling out a small journal bound in brown leather. "Since it's probably going to take a while to get home, I made something for you."
"Is this… what I think it is?" Virgil gawped as he leafed through the pages.
"Yep! Your very own Beginner's Guide to Magic!" Zatanna chirped happily. "I made it myself."
"Are you sure this is… alright?"
"It couldn't hurt for my daughter to have friends she can rely on," Giovanni stated. "Just… don't abuse this gift you've been given, and try not to 'burst the bubble'."
"Relax. I'll keep it close to the vest. Don't wanna be burned at the stake or anything," he chuckled, only for the four of them to wince. "Ah, my bad. That must've been in poor taste."
Of course magic-users would be touchy about the Witch Hunts/Inquisition, and for the Martians, burning alive at the stake must've been their equivalent to the electric chair.
"Before you go, I have something for you as well," Giovanni said walking up to him. "As thanks… For saving my baby girl," he said passing a small box into Virgil's hand, before clapping his own over it in a firm shake. "I can't thank you enough for all you've done. You have my gratitude."
"Yeah… well… I'd be a pretty shitty human being if I hadn't helped your daughter out when she needed it," Virgil said scratching the back of his head, slipping what Giovanni had given him into his pocket.
"Hey, you coming or what?" Mordecai asked from the window.
"I'll be up in a second!" Virgil snapped before turning back to the two. "Zatanna, M'gann, it's been… interesting."
"I'll miss you," M'gann returned, wrapping him in a tight hug that lifted him off his feet, which Virgil returned awkwardly.
"I'll miss you too," Virgil said giving her a pat on the head before extricating himself from her grip. "Zatanna, you listen to your dad, you hear? And stay out of trouble."
"I hear you," Zatanna nodded. "You take care of yourself, okay?"
"Don't worry," Virgil said as he ruffled her hair. "I will."
"Have a safe trip! Let's meet up again sometime!" M'gann said as Virgil stepped into the door of the RV.
"Hey! Virgil!"
Turning around, the red-eyed teen was caught off-guard as Zatanna rushed up and wrapped her arms around him in a desperate embrace, holding him tightly against her budding curves, squeezing for all she was worth.
"Virgil. Thank you… for saving my life," she whispered, tears wetting the corners of her eyes.
"Any time, kiddo," Virgil said with a soft smile, returning the hug. "When there's trouble, you know who to call."
"Don't worry. I will," the girl nodded, her mood brightening. "And hey, if things don't work out with that girl back home, I always have room in my act for a 'handsome assistant'," she said with a wink that almost-assuredly gave her father a heart attack.
"Gurk!"
That or an aneurysm.
"I'll… be sure to keep that in mind," Virgil nodded nervously, stepping into the RV. "Step on it!" he hissed as he latched the door, the RV speeding away from the Bellagio and toward the rising sun.
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
"Well that got steamy right at the end~" Lilith teased, sitting across from Virgil in the small dining room across from the door. "That Zatanna girl's gonna be a real beauty when she gets older."
"I don't want to hear it," Virgil grumbled as he looked around what would effectively be his digs for the next few days.
The RV was ridiculously spacious, a deluxe bathroom in the back with what looked like a god damn hot tub in it, a large bedroom just in front of that on the right side, a kitchen across from that, a living room setup with a fold-out couch and a huge TV on the opposite wall, and a dashboard with all the bells and whistles. Even though there were five of them squeezed in, six if you counted Bloodwing, there was still elbow room to spare.
There was even a bathroom stall in the event more than one person had to use the crapper at once.
"Just how much does something like this go for on the open market?" Virgil asked hoping to change the subject.
"Fifty grand, maybe more, and she's all mine," the sniper purred as he stroked the wheel.
"You're a travelling mercenary. What the hell are you going to use it for?"
"Hey, a guy can have nice things, can't he?" Mordecai asked. "Besides, now if we're ever stateside, we can take us a nice road trip without being cramped into our A-Team van and cramming ourselves into shitty motels."
"You'll understand that after the way this one went, I'll hesitate to go anywhere with you guys in the future."
"Hey, c'mon, Slab. Where's your sense of adventure?" Brick asked.
"Anywhere you guys aren't," he said flatly.
"Aww," Brick whined.
"Anywayyy…" Lilith began with a lilted voice. "Seeing as how it's just us here, how about we get that confession out of you, hm~?"
"What do you want me to say, Lil'? That at my last school I murdered a bunch of asshole guys after I found them gang-raping a bunch of girls in the chem lab? Or that the feds found out I was a Two-Percenter and they had to move me into witness protection? Or that maybe someone dropped the ball on my paperwork forcing me to scrape together whatever meager existence I could in a boarding house above a bar run by a clown-hooker in a 'dirty magician' outfit? Is that what you want me to say? Well? Is it?!" he demanded, his patience for the day quickly guttering out.
And they hadn't even hit the freeway yet.
"Um…"
"Uh…"
"Er…"
" . . . Wow," Brick awed following his friends' reactions. "That's way more edgy than what I thought you were gonna say."
"And what did you think I was going to say?"
"Um… No comment."
"Yeah, that's what I thought. Now… if you'll excuse me…" Virgil said as he walked over to the couch, "dredging up the past has utterly exhausted me, so I'm going to take a nap. If you need me, you know where to find me," he said as he laid his head down. "Don't. Need me," he said tersely with his head snapped up before dropping down for real.
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
Colorado
November 19, 11:35 MST
Virgil, laying on a couch as he slumbered in the middle of the day due to two straight days of superhero bullshit on what was supposed to be a vacation, got the suspicious feeling that something was off about the RV.
It wasn't so much that he was aware of what was going on around him as he slept, but he got the distinct feeling that they'd slowed to a stop, waited half a minute, taken on some additional baggage, before going on their merry way once again.
Normally, in the depths of his sleeping conscious, he'd rule this off as some sort of dream. His dream by itself was technically "dreamless", though he had the distinct impression he was then-presently "projecting into" the Mindscape that M'gann had made him aware of when they'd met.
The infinitely-expanding wall of Psyche Locks definitely gave credence to that theory.
However, the fact that the cargo in the underbelly of the RV made a slightly different sound whenever they made a wide turn or hit a bump in the road, in addition to counting six different Human inhalation/exhalation patterns instead of five, told him that something was up.
Cracking open an eye only to wince back as the sun's rays stabbed his retinas, a moment later something leaned to intercept. Squinting his now-shaded eyes as he tried that again, eyes of crimson met a lovely shade of seafoam green mere feet away from his own.
The owner of aforementioned seafoam eyes was a petite girl with a light complexion, thin eyebrows, and hair a slightly darker shade than Yoko's styled in medium-length pigtails atop her head; what made them stand out was the fact that they were bound with rubber tubing and pipe gauges instead of the conventional hair scrunchies. Her attire consisted of a black-trimmed red T-shirt with a little skull on the cheast, a button-up sleeveless dark-blue hoodie with thin black trim, a red pleated skirt, black-and-white striped stockings, and dark-blue sneakers with white soles. Resting atop her head were a pair of rectangular gray welding goggles with yellow tinted lenses, and she had a tool belt synched around her slim waist.
All in all she was really cute.
And a complete stranger who was not in the RV when they'd left Vegas.
"Why hello there, sexy~" the ginger cooed with lidded eyes.
"JESUS CHRIST!" Virgil yelped as he scrambled backwards from the unfamiliar girl looming over him, going head over ass over the end of the couch and landing on his skull. "Ow! Sonuva-"
"Language!" Brick chided.
"Who the hell is this?!" Virgil yelped as he scrambled to his feet.
"Gaige Gagne, girl genius extraordinaire!" the girl named Gaige greeted with an exaggerated bow and arm-sweep. "At your… service~" she purred as she eyed him.
"Mordy. Explain. NOW!"
"Long story short: We saw this sweet little thing and her robot trying to hitch a ride, Brick and I took pity on her, and here she is."
"Her and her… robot?" he asked incredulously.
"Yeah. I call him Deathtrap. D.T. for short," the ginger girl replied chipperly. "By the way, where'd you get your robot? And why does he smell like burnt hotdogs?"
"His name's Ace. We looted him from the Royal Flush Gang after he punched a fuse box and nuked himself," Brick answered.
"And you two…" Virgil said turning to Lilith and Roland, who at the moment were watching TV. "You're both okay with this?"
"Hey, us outcasts gotta look out for our own," Lilith said pointing between herself and Gaige.
"Why? What's her story?"
"Weeeelll…" Gaige hummed as she leaned from side to side. "I maaaaaay have been indirectly responsible for a teeeeny, tiiiiiny, little bloody murder," she said in a juxtapositioningly-sweet tone. "Not my fault! The bitch set my robot's defense protocols off."
"Oh, then you and the kid have that in common then. V-man over there tricked me into ending a clan war with a bunch of C4."
"You can't prove that," Virgil denied.
"Ooh… I love a man who can play with fire~" Gaige purred with lidded eyes.
" . . . And you're really, really cool with this? Smuggling her across state lines?"
"Hey, we smuggled you over state lines, didn't we?" Mordecai asked.
"And I re-iterate, I didn't activate any sort of detonator, nor can you prove I snuck out to the desert in the middle of the night in a skin-tight bodysuit and rig a dozen blocks of C4 and gasoline canisters to the underside of an abandoned train station."
" . . . Mmh! That sentence was so hot!" Gaige purred, eyeing Virgil up and down.
"Hey kid, do you want some water?" Lilith asked.
"Why-"
"Because you are damn thirsty!" Lilith finished.
" . . . Maybe a little," the red-head admitted bashfully, her cheeks dusting the color of her hair.
"What, they not have any cute boys at your last school?"
"It did, but… They all thought I was too nerdy," Gaige sighed sadly, making Virgil's heart clench.
"The guys at your school must've been blind-as-hell, cause you're totally cute," he blurted out.
"Y-You really think so? Th-Thank you," Gaige replied bashfully. "I uh… I clean up real nice," she said with a small smile, idly scratching her cheek.
"Damn, boy. You are on fire with the ladies, aren't ya?" Brick asked with a grin.
"I'm not trying, I'm just being honest!" Virgil yelped.
"And that's the worst kind of lady-killer of all," Lilith sighed with a shake of her head.
" . . . I still feel like I need some more context," Virgil said turning back to the pigtailed girl. "Could you explain this to me from the beginning?"
"Well, when a man and a woman love each other veeery muuuch…"
"Not that beginning. I mean the beginning of what led up to the murder. What's the story behind the robot and the 'bitch'?"
"Oh, right. Silly me," Gaige chuckled, giving herself a light knock on the head. "Well… It started out a couple weeks ago when Star Academy announced the annual science fair. You see, unlike public schools, at Star Academy, winning the science fair actually means something. If you're able to win any of the top three slots, not only do you get a trophy, but you also get additional grant money, renown in the scientific community, job security after you graduate, and an article done about you in Popular Science."
"So this Star Academy… It's a school for super-geniuses?"
"Super-duper geniuses!" Gaige corrected excitedly. "See, with guys like T.O. Morrow and Anthony Ivo using their super-smarts for criminal enterprises and killing loads of people, the government decided to create a private school for kids like us in the Silicon Valley, that way we'd be able to apply our super-smarts after graduation instead of getting written off as a bunch of insane nut-cases and being forced to the Dark Side to make end's meet."
"And how does this relate to the murder, which as you said before was 'not your fault'?" he asked making air quotes.
"I was getting to that," Gaige pouted cutely. "Now, me, I'm going into the fields of robotics and cybernetics, part of the 'Tomorrow' Clique named after T.O Morrow who also specialized in the field, basically pioneering it back in the 1940s before people even thought robots and cybernetics could be that smart. So, the obvious thing for me to make? Well, seeing as how I couldn't get my hands on any amputees on such short notice and self-mutilation is kinda frowned-upon after that one German kid got busted for using the school's state-of-the-art med-labs to exercise his masochistic tendencies and body dysmorphic disorder, I decided to make an anti-bullying robot; the Mechanized Anti-Bully Deterrent Test, or Project DT."
"I thought robots weren't allowed to kill people."
"To hell with the first law!-I mean…" she stopped bashfully, composing herself. "The Laws of Robotics only apply if you actually apply them. Robots don't innately follow Asimov's Rules of Robotics like people follow Memes; they have to be coded into their programming, otherwise they'll be mindless killing machines. That or Roombas. Anyway!" she said getting back on-topic. "To make a long story short, this total bitch Marcie Holloway, snobby little rich girl whose dad has more money than god, totally ripped off my designs!"
"So this Marcie girl is a master hacker, I take it?"
"Ha! She wishes! No, Marcie might be rich but that's all that's keeping her at Star Academy. Well… Kept her… Anyway, she hires some hackers to steal my designs, but I was able to make Deathtrap Mk 4 using the backup my daddy always has me make. Then, the science fair comes a couple weeks later, and wouldn't you know it, Marcie's little rip-off-bot can't even fire off two laser shots without totally overheating. DT on the other hand really impresses the judges with all the bells and whistles I put in; my 'Close Enough' tech, 'Fancy Mathematics' programming, 'Explosive Clap' subroutine, the works."
"So how did things go wrong then?"
"Well… Even though things were looking good and I was looking really brilliant, Marcie's dad bought off the entire judges' panel, so Marcie's piece-of-crap 'Crime Buster Bot' won first place and I earned… third, place. Third. Place. That is what we call politics, people, and it's really unfair, because I… Okay, anyway, Marcie started gloating, then she pointed and laughed at me, and then she… pushed me."
"And that's when things got messy?"
"Like you wouldn't believe…" Gaige sighed, her pigtails wilting slightly. "See, Deathtrap recognized Marcie as a threat, and then he grabbed her, and the second his claws touched her skin she kind of… like… um… Okay, she exploded!" she blurttted out. "She was like… EVERYWHERE! It… skin… things, uh, eyebealls, I don't know, it was gross!" she said, flailing her arms about. "Anyway, after they finished cleaning up Marcie and the auditorium I was escorted to the principal's office, which I've never been to before, and I found out I wasn't getting expelled or arrested for what Deathtrap did to Marcie…"
"Oh, well that doesn't sound so bad," Brick hummed.
"I was being expelled AND arrested for what Deathtrap did to Marcie!"
"Oh, so it was that bad," Brick amended.
"Anyway… the first free moment I get, I called up my dad and got him to create a distraction. He's very brilliant with things like that and I'm not going to go into details about it, but let's just say it involves a golf cart and a lot of gasoline, so that I could slip away. So… so after a teary farewell… I love you, Daddy…" she trailed off with a sniff, prompting Virgil to pass her a tissue. "Thank you. That was very sweet," she said meekly, loudly blowing her nose in a very unladylike fashion before getting back to the conversation. "Anyway, after that I hit the road with DT and headed east, figured I could hunker down somewhere I wouldn't go to jail for being brilliant."
"But won't you go to jail for running?" Virgil asked incredulously.
"Oh, don't worry about it. Daddy told me he 'knows a guy', and all I have to do is avoid getting caught," Gaige chirped happily.
"Um. Guys…" Mordecai spoke up, the RV slowing down. "We might have a bit of a problem on that front."
"Police barricade? Who're they looking for?" Lilith asked as she looked out on the road.
"Let's see…" Mordecai hummed, drawing his scope from his side and honing in on where the traffic had ground to a standstill up ahead. "Shit, they're looking for the kid."
"How do you know that?" Gaige asked.
"Wanted poster. They're checking every car and popping the trunks."
"Gaige, how could they possibly know what road you're on?" Virgil asked.
"Well… Maybe having a floating legless torso of pure awesomeness helping me hitch a ride… wasn't the best idea," the ginger chuckled nervously, causing Virgil to unashamedly slap his face.
*Slap*
"I don't think anyone saw us picking her up, but they're definitely going to check an RV," Moridecai said as he creeped forward. "What're we going to do?"
"I could always Phaseshift Gaige and I somewhere up the road, you just pick us up after the checkpoint," Lilith suggested.
"No. Someone might see you," Roland said shaking his head. "Is there anywhere here we could hide her?"
"There's always the bathroom, or the hot tub," Brick suggested.
"No, they'd check those places too. Especially if we're acting suspiciously, and some of our poker faces really suck," Lilith groaned.
"If I get completely drunk I could probably make a good poker face," Mordecai suggested in turn.
"Um… guys," Virgil said, getting everyone's attention. "I… might have an idea," he admitted, firmly wrapping himself up in this shady business.
Not even a day has passed since his sort-of-a-vacation-but-not-really-one in Vegas and he was already diving back down the rabbit hole.
'Well, at least my life isn't boring, though I'm not sure if that's better or worse.'
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
"Officer. Good afternoon," Roland greeted from the driver's seat.
Having a drunken sniper be the first face the police see… prooobably not the best idea.
"Good day," the officer responded, pleasantly surprised by the cooperation the driver was displaying, as opposed to previous cases of "I have rights!", "You racist pig!", and "My taxes pay your bills! Do what I say and let me through!"
"Is there a problem?" the soldier asked amicably.
"We're on the lookout for a dangerous fugitive," the officer said holding up a poster. "She was last seen on this road, but when an officer got to where she was last seen, she wasn't there."
"And you think she might be in one of these cars?"
"Unless she's slipped the net. Whoever this girl pissed off must have a ton of money if this manhunt's going across state lines," the man answered, trailing off a little at the end. "Anyway, I'm going to have to ask that we be allowed to search your vehicle. After that you can be on your way."
"Alright," Roland nodded. "Fair warning, my friends can be a little… socially awkward," he whispered conspiratorially.
"Well… Hey, my kid came out of the closet the other day, so I'm sure I can handle whatever your friends throw at me," the officer said amicably as he stepped around and into the RV.
What he was greeted with was the sight of a massive wall of muscle struggling to get to the TV channel he wanted with his fat fingers, a guy in a leather mask mouth-feeding a dangerous-looking bird, and a red-head covered in tattoos chugging beer and scratching her belly in a very unladylike fashion.
'Then again… I may've bitten off more than I can chew,' the officer hummed as he began to search the RV.
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
Meanwhile in the bathroom stall, Virgil was sitting atop the john, his phone in his hand as he waited for the officer to commence his search.
After a few moments he heard footsteps, and another moment later those footsteps came towards the door.
'Now!' Virgil thought as he hit the Play icon on his screen and held his phone out at max volume.
Cue Metal Gear Solid 5: Phantom Pain Soundtrack - Soldier with Stomachache – Recorded in the Toilet
Otacon had originally sent it to him as a joke, and apparently, Bosses and Snakes had been using this very same sort of recording to hide in bathroom stalls for generations, using the utterly revolting sound of some poor soul emptying his bowels to chase away the weaker-willed.
Normally, playing such an offensive audio file wouldn't be a problem for him. His moral compass was so cracked, bent, broken, and warped that he didn't mind playing something so unrelentingly vulgar to get officers of the law off his ass.
What did make the whole experience a problem for him was that Gaige was straddling his lap, arms wrapped around his neck, chest flush with his, and nose nuzzling nose as the two of them hid in the enclosed space. Gaige wasn't unattractive, far from it, she was smart and pretty, but because of the very open expression of her carnal feelings for him, possibly as a consequence of watching Marcie Halloway "explode" right in front of her, it was getting very hard not to get an erection over this.
He doubted Athena would blame him if he just calmly explained how-strongly Gaige was coming onto him, but that didn't change the fact that Gaige was making him incredibly aroused and he had no way of fighting his baser instincts without blowing their cover.
He wasn't sure if that "Vicky Mendoza Diagonal" thing still applied, but Gaige was getting really close to dipping below that most-sacred of lines.
'Think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy thought.'
"Ugh! Gawd! What did this guy eat?" the officer asked, utterly revulsed by what he was hearing the moment he stepped in front of the stall.
"You know… I think it might've been the tacos," Brick hummed aloud.
"Tacos? Wait… You didn't go to Dirty Dan's, did you?" the officer outside asked.
*Snap* "That's the place!" Mordecai nodded, snapping his fingers for effect.
"Oh god… I think some got in my mouth," the officer retched, dashing out of the RV and hitting his hand on the side. "You're good to go. And light some god-damned candles!"
"Will do!" Roland replied, the RV pulling away at a sedate pace.
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
" . . . Okay. I think we're in the clear," Lilith said after the most-tense fifteen-minute wait of their lives.
Well, the most-tense fifteen minutes of that month at least.
No red-and-blue lights were coming after them from down the road, so for as far as they knew, they really had pulled the wool over them.
"Gaige? Hey, Gaige, the cops are gone, you can get off my lap now."
That statement caused Mordecai and Brick to chuckle.
"Aw, but it's so warm and… cozy~"
"Gaige. Now."
"O-kay. Fine," the girl genius huffed, stepping out of the bathroom. "So I take it we lost them?"
"Like a quarter between couch cushions," Brick chuckled.
"Phew!" the girl genius sighed. "Hey uh, thanks for not selling me out."
"No problem. We've had our scruples with the law too," Lilith admitted.
"So what do you guys do for a living anyway? You some kind of… soldiers of fortune?"
"Like the A-Team, I guess," Mordecai shrugged. "Just with more guns."
"Aaand murder," Brick hummed.
"So that's why you have the loot-bot. Wait, you didn't-"
"Most of the Royal Flush Gang is still alive, save the sniper; no way around that. We weren't operating in an area with an accepted vigilante presence, so we had to keep the body count to a minimum," Roland answered succinctly.
"Hm. Well, if more-money-than-god Holloway makes things too-difficult for me here, think you could get me out of the country?"
"You really have that much faith in your dad, don't you?" Virgil asked.
"Hey, daddy's always been straight with me. If he says he knows a guy that can fix this, I'll believe him. I've just gotta do my part so I don't get shipped out to Guantanamo Bay or something," Gaige said with crossed arms. "That or a women's correctional facility. Those women are animals."
"Fair enough," Virgil shrugged.
"Though… I have to ask…" Roland hummed.
"What?" Virgil groaned, not liking the man's tone.
"Why do you have a recording of diarrhea and/or indigestion on your phone?"
"A co-worker sent it to me as a joke. I guess he uses it for extended bathroom breaks or some bullshit," Virgil groaned.
The best lies have just-enough truth in them that they can sell.
That's how he got away with telling them his "origin story" without breaking his NDA.
That and because if that story got around, people would know "that" is what happened, and not press him for details in the future.
"Well, it definitely worked," Mordecai shuddered. "I knew the whole thing was being staged and even I got grossed out by that."
"Unfortunately, not everyone shared that sentiment," Virgil said as he eyed Gaige.
"Hey, you're the first cute guy to ever not think I was nerdy, and call me cute to my face without it being sarcastic," the red-head returned. "Between all that and your cute ass, you can only blame yourself."
"I should probably warn you, he's already got a girl back home waiting for him," Lilith chuckled.
"Dammit! The good ones are always taken!" she swore, stomping her foot. " . . . Think I could talk this girl into a three-way?" she asked hopefully after a moment.
"No!"/"Maybe," Virgil/Lilith shouted/answered simultaneously, the brunette shooting the tattooed red-head a look.
"What do you mean maybe?" Virgil demanded.
"We- I mean… Athena could be open to the idea," Lilith answered honestly. "She might seem cute and innocent, but she is Moxxi's daughter."
"So that automatically makes her a tramp?!"
"N-No! Of course not! It's just… growing up in that household, Athena might be a bit more open-minded about that sort of thing."
"Ooh~ I like where this is going," Gaige purred. "Tell me more~"
'This is my life… This is totally my life right now,' Virgil thought feeling another sliver of "normalcy" slip through his fingers.
Then again, as soon as he got involved with aliens and magical girls, none of this should've surprised him.
He'd be surprised if anything surprised him after this.
" . . . So," Brick hummed trying to ease the tension out of the air. "Who wants lunch?"
"I could eat," Mordecai said as Bloodwing squawked.
"After that little act in the bathroom, my appetite's rather… indisposed right now," Virgil grumbled. "I'm going to work on my GED. Do not, need me for anything, at least for the rest of the day."
"But-"
"At least the rest of the day!" the brunette demanded, stomping off towards the master bedroom in the back before shutting the door with a *WHAM!*
"Geez, who tinkled in his cornflakes?" Gaige questioned.
"To be fair, his vacation was turned into the working variety," Lilith answered.
"Ooh. Yikes," Gaige winced.
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
' . . . Okay, I know I said I was going to work on my GED, but after the day I've had, I just can't get myself motivated,' Virgil thought to himself with a sigh as he laid on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. 'Hm… I wonder how things are going back home.'
Spooling up his phone, Virgil was surprised to see that there weren't any messages from work.
Then again, since he had just gotten out of a rad-scrubbing following his previous sortie, maybe his employers were just being considerate-enough to give him an extended leave of absence; which was good because after that shady business with the Zaffords and Hodunks, he'd kinda gone AWOL.
That, or the Nanosuit needed additional scrubbing. He didn't know what it was made of per-se, but given all the stuff it could do, he assumed it was made of nanomachines that functioned like a living "skinsuit".
Following the check for any work-related messages, he was somewhat pleased to see that his mailbox was absolutely flooded with texts and pics from his newest acquaintances. From the number of pairs of smiling faces he was privy to, it was obvious Zatanna and M'gann had hit it off swimmingly once he'd left, and all the Vegas landmarks in the background were signs they were having a good time.
Barring some small talk about the dustup at the Hoover Dam or the "White She-Hulk", nothing else was on the Vegas news, which was good for his nerves because as long as it was "boring", Zatanna and M'gann weren't putting their lives in danger.
The texts were run-of-the-mill progress reports with a few questions thrown in; mostly, where was he now, how was the road trip, and any openings in their schedules. Virgil didn't know if Zatanna could teleport or if M'gann had her own spaceship, but since him living in Bludhaven didn't seem to pose a problem for them, he'd just assume they were way more mobile than he.
After wishing the two of them the best of luck, he got down to the brass tacks. Something that'd been nagging at the back of his head but didn't occur to him to ask until just-then.
V: Hey Z, whatever happened to my "Sunday Best"?
A few minutes later, his message was received and summarily returned.
Z: Oh that? Slipped it back with your things after the Hoover Dam Tour.
V: Oh. Thanks for that.
Z: You're welcome :)
V: Next question. How do I do that "quick change" trick of yours?
Z: Quick change?
Z: OH! You mean THAT "quick change".
Z: First, you gotta put your Sunday Best where you know it'll be.
Z: I choose a nice box in the closet.
Z: Second, you get a cool Catch Phrase ready.
Z: It should be something super-easy to remember.
Z: Last, you "Imagine" it leaving the box and wrapping around you in a plume of smoke.
Z: Whatever you were wearing before gets swapped out.
V: Should I be worried about distance?
Z: Not really. No.
Z: Then again, I try to keep my "Sunday Best" on the same continent, sooo…
V: Alright.
V: Well… I'll see about getting that trick down for the next time we meet up.
V: Give you a bit of a show.
Z: I'm looking forward to it. ;)
Z: Oh. BTW. Let's see about meeting up after you get back home.
Z: Megan has this sweet ride she wants to show you later. We can meet up super-easy.
'Huh. Well, that answers one question…' Virgil nodded, since he assumed "Megan's" ride was a spaceship; either whatever she used to come to Earth, or a hand-me-down from her Uncle. 'Well, that's one load off my shoulders, I guess,' he thought to himself as he set his phone down, before digging into his carry-on. 'I have no way of knowing if I'll have another moment to myself after this, so I guess now's as good a time as any to dig into this little trinket,' he said pulling out Zatanna's "Beginner's Guide to Magic".
Flipping through the hand-written pages, Virgil had to wonder how she was able to dictate all the sentences, footnotes, paragraphs, and pictures on such short notic- Oh! Wait.
There it is.
Apparently there is a Dictation Spell that magically moves a writing implement to pen down whatever it is you're thinking about. The Catch 22 is that the spell is very literal with what you're thinking and/or visualizing, so if your mind wanders for even a moment, you might get stuck with something you didn't want penned down. That and if you aren't looking at the page, apparently you'll scribble "all over the desk".
Of course, based on its orientation within the book, situated in the rear-half, the [Dictation Spell] appeared to be one of the more advanced "Basic Magics".
He knew Magic was real from what Colonel told him, but to actually hold a legit magic guidebook in his hands… Still felt pretty unreal.
Flipping back to the beginning, he came across hand-written excerpts about the basics of the basics.
He also noticed that Zatanna had very legible handwriting. Nothing in cursive, thank god, but given all this possibly was penned overnight magically, excellent penmanship was probably going to be a given.
"Let's see… Exercises to increase one's magical sense… Exercises to increase one's magical capacity… Exercises to increase one's magical efficiency… Exercises to hide one's magical ability… Oh? Basics of Physics Manipulation?"
Apparently Zatanna did pay attention in her science classes, despite being so-obviously magical, because there was a bit of scientific method in there as well. Very-understandable excerpts about how magic manipulated Light, Sound, Heat, Friction, Movement, how it Created Elements, Generated Electricity, or how Mental Attacks could induce "status effects" like Sleep, Vertigo, or Illusions.
"Hm. Neat. I'll have to send her a thank-you card," Virgil nodded as he went back to the beginning.
While it'd be difficult to increase his "Magical Sense" without other magic users around, it seemed the easiest and most sure-fire way of increasing his Magical Capacity was to simply use spells until he reached the edge of Magical Exhaustion; which was basically whenever he felt like he was about to "nod off".
There was also another note about "Over-Casting", directly referencing the time he threw a bolt of Lightning in a fit of panic and "magic'd himself stupid" for a few hours- OH! She was even nice-enough to include the recipe for a resource-friendly Mana Potion. Apparently the taste was awful, but it seemed that that was the only real side-effect to using them.
There was also a cute little add-on about how mixing it into four-parts orange juice for one-part "MP Pot" was apparently enough to take the edge off.
There were Mana Potions out there that did a better job for less volume, but the high-end stuff tended to use more… exotic materials, and were somewhat dangerous for a novice to attempt making.
Of course, the little caricature of a novice spellcaster literally exploding was probably enough to get that message across.
"Oh, that reminds me," Virgil said as he dug into his bag once more, drawing out the small box Giovanni had given him just-before he left.
Popping the box open, inside he discovered a ring; albeit, a very well-crafted ring. The band was wide and flat, the entire thing colored a polished silver; held onto it with four small bolts was a tiny curved plate reading Virga annual quae movet Artem magicam.
Obviously, since Virgil couldn't speak Latin, he had to look it up on his phone. What the high-end Translator that Otacon put in told him was that the inscription on the ring meant- "The staff-ring which activates the art of magic."
All in all, it kinda looked like an Accessory from Kingdom Hearts 2.
Feeling something nagging at the back of his head, Virgil set the ring down and flipped open the book once again, feeling like he'd seen something like this somewhere before.
After a few moments, he'd found the page he was looking for.
Early on in the book, Zatanna's guide talked about "Foci", the magical implements used in "Western Style" magic to help Homo Magi wield their magic. While magic could be used without a Foci, the Foci itself helped increase and more-importantly stabilize the output of Mana as spellcraft was used. A visual metaphor used was a shower stall, where you could change the temperature and/or the shape of the water coming out of the showerhead. Most Foci were staves or wands, but other possibilities included jewels, books, and of course, rings.
Apparently any Homo Magi could buy a general-purpose wand and cast magic reasonably well, though this was only for the novices. For a proper mage, customized Foci were the norm, which was accompanied by a doodle of Harry Potter and his Phoenix Feather wand made out of Holly. Using a wand that didn't "suit you" often ended in disaster, like trying to drive stick when all you knew was an automatic.
Of course, it wasn't rare for high-class mages like her father, Giovanni, to dispose of Foci entirely, since they were able to so-freely manipulate their Mana outside their bodies. Zatanna even went as far as to note that despite only being 13, she was still a prodigy among magic-users.
"Well… At least I won't have to worry about carrying around a pointy stick," Virgil hummed as he slipped the ring onto his right index finger. The next moment to his shock the ring shrunk slightly; not painfully, but enough that it fit snugly around his digit, and to the point that it didn't get in the way of his clenched fist.
Taking it off, Virgil discovered that the "staff-ring" remained at its post-shrunken size. If he had to make a guess, he'd assume Giovanni had attuned the ring to him, so that at the very least he could competently protect his daughter if it ever came to that again.
Slipping the ring back onto his finger and giving his fingers a roll, Virgil looked at it and then the book before hopping off the bed and going over to the fold-down desk in the corner of the room.
Situated atop it was some stationary, a lamp, and a paperweight. The paperweight wasn't so-heavy he couldn't lift it with one hand, but it was still heavy-enough that it wouldn't slide over the edge of the RV made a wide turn.
Of course, the rubber pads on the bottom also could've helped.
Referencing some of the beginner's level spells before turning his attention back to the paperweight, he narrowed his eyes at the object before incanting- "Pils." -, his ring-clad hand held out.
Waiting a couple moments, he tapped the side and almost fell out of his seat when the once-heavy paperweight slid to the left like an air hockey puck.
"Willing" the spell to cancel before it went completely over the side, giving it a tap to make sure the magic really had been dispelled, Virgil searched his thoughts and notice he felt a little tired, but not so-tired he couldn't continue.
Grabbing a piece of scrap paper and putting down a tally mark so he'd have some kind of metric as to what his limit was, Virgil went back to moving the paperweight to and fro, sending it back-and-forth before stopping it and adding more tally marks, feeling like the kid in Christmas who'd just gotten his hands on a brand new toy.
Even if he couldn't get guys outside his weight class to fall flat on their faces or make enemy vehicles lose all traction like whenever they'd caught some of D-Horse's "leavings" under their tires back in Afghanistan, this spell would be crazy useful for moving furniture.
Which, unironically enough, was actually notarized as one of the more mundane uses for magic whenever someone had a fit of whimsy to rearrange the furniture.
*COUNTRY ROAD*
*Knock* *Knock* "Hey… Can I come in?" a voice asked of him a while later.
"What do you want, Gaige?" Virgil asked, looking up from his magical handbook.
"I uh… just wanted to check in on you. The others are really worried."
"They don't have anything to worry about, as long as no-one bothers me with random bullshit for the rest of the day."
"So… I take it you were kinda banking on this vacation?"
"More than you can possibly imagine."
"So…" Gaige hummed as she slumped back against the door. "Guess you had a rough week?"
" . . . Not compared to you," Virgil sighed. "I'm not angry at you, I just… wanted things to settle down for a bit before life took another shit on me."
"Yeah… The guys told me about what happened… at your last school… Said you kinda bit their heads off when they pushed you on that," Gaige nodded. "So, you can just… kill, whenever you feel like it?" she asked a minute later.
"If I want to kill someone, my brain won't 'stall' the same way a regular person would, if that's what you're asking," Virgil answered. "Anywhere from ten to twenty percent of soldiers deployed in the field for the first time won't even fire their weapons, even the ones that know they should. I, wouldn't have that problem, which is why I'm being kept under observation… ish," he amended. "Of course, I can still feel guilty about killing people, that part of my brain doesn't have anything wrong with it."
"I see… Honestly, I thought the 'Two Percenter' thing was just a myth. Some of the guys back at Star Academy would've loved to get a scan of your brain."
"And what? Make more killer robots?"
"Well, more like the 'Dr. Frankenstein's at Star would try and use that data to make it so any soldier would kill without hesitating. Maybe with a DNA Computer or something. Some of the seniors go into military contracts 'cause the money's good, but… I don't want to do that," she admitted.
"And yet, you made a robot that killed someone for the science fair."
"Hey, that was a freak accident! DT is not a murder-bot!"
"Your anti-bullying robot has the word 'Death' in its name."
" . . . Touché, Virgil Valentine. Touché…" Gaige conceded.
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
Dodge City, Kansas
November 19, 17:18 CST
'So glad I packed my schoolwork with me, even if this vacation was a complete bust,' Virgil thought to himself as he closed his laptop, feeling the RV pulling off the highway before coming to a complete stop a couple minutes later. "So… We stopping for dinner?" he asked as he stepped out of the room.
"That and some grocery shopping," Lilith nodded, followed by a growling stomach. "Though by the sound of things, I'd guess you'd rather have dinner first," she chuckled.
"So… How'd your work on your GED go?" Gaige asked as everyone got up and stretched. "If you're having trouble with math, I can totally help out with that. I am crazy-good at trig."
"It's coming along. I figure the sooner I get it out of the way, the sooner a bunch of free time will open up for me," Virgil answered. "As for the math… If I hit a roadblock, you'll be the first person I call."
"Mmhm… And what about college?"
"I'll worry about living long-enough to reach college-attending age before actually worrying about college itself."
That and he had no idea what he could do that wouldn't at-the-same-time interfere with his mercenary duties.
He doubted he could be a male model forever, given how-dangerous his line of work was. Hell, he'd gotten his shoulder clipped and part of his ear blown off and even if they'd been healed-over with magic, he was leaning more towards his "Battle Scarred Edition" with every incident.
"Still, we probably should do something about your look," Lilith said turning to Gaige. "The pipe gauge pigtails… They really stand out."
"Well, what do you suggest?"
"Less is more, girls. Less is more," Virgil said as he walked past them, stepping out into the night air.
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
All things considered, "less" really was "more". All it really took to "hide" Gaige from the notice of passerby was to let her hair down, slap a baseball cap on her head, and have her wear some of Lilith's casual attire.
Of course, the real test of her disguise was, after sitting down in the roadside diner, when the news playing on the TV ran the story about what happened at Star Academy. The studio had opted out of showing the actual quote/unquote "murder" of Marcie Halloway, but they certainly didn't hesitate to slap a wanted poster and reward on the screen.
Miraculously, no-one gave Gaige a second glance.
Guess all it really took to disguise her iconic silhouette was… change the silhouette.
"So… We're heading all the way to the east coast, huh?" Gaige hummed as she looked at the menu, as-casual as she was able.
"Yeah. Bludhaven's a little wild at times, but after exorcising that Ghost Car last month, you should be perfectly safe," Lilith hummed.
"Unless someone gene-mods a Thanksgiving turkey as some kind of supervillain plot that is," Brick nodded. "Is it ironic if a man-hungry turkey turns you into food on Thanksgiving?"
"Don't even joke about superhero BS like that," Virgil grumbled.
He still got flashback from that damn Ghost Car.
"What? No love for the capes-and-undies crowd?" Gaige asked.
"More like he can't tolerate baseless hero-worship; or people acting like superheroes 'save everyone'."
"Thank you, Roland. Glad someone sees the distinction," Virgil chirped.
"So… We stopping for the night or what?" Mordecai asked, Bloodwing keeping watch from outside.
The diner didn't allow dogs, so he'd just assume Bloodwing wouldn't be welcomed.
"We may as well. All of us are tired from the long road today, and neither of you have a driver's license I'd trust in the middle of the night," Roland answered.
"Yeah, that's fair," Virgil shrugged. "I guess I'll keep first watch, or something."
"I'll stay up with ya, then," Gaige answered. "I'm used to pulling an all-nighter or two."
"Well, that settles it then," Lilith nodded. "All things considered, we made decent time today, but let's try and be back home before Thanksgiving."
"Hey guys… Thanks. For picking me up like you did," Gaige said with a grateful smile on her face.
"Hey, what're outcasts for?" Lilith asked, giving the girl a playful punch on the cheek. "Now… Let's eat!"
"I'mma order the Superman Burger," Brick chuckled.
"Has Superman even been in Kansas?" Mordecai asked.
'Just ignore the stupid-talk,' Virgil sighed as Brick and Mordy speculated about whether or not a bus up near Smallville being pulled out of the river was-in-fact an act of Superman.
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
Dinner was an ordinary affair despite the un-ordinary nature of the six diners. After filling their bellies with food, the pantry with snacks, and the tank with gas, Mordecai took the RV a few miles up the road to the nearest rest stop, well away from Dodge City. Between the Fortune Hunters and their varying body types, as well as the sleep-friendly space of the RV, with the newlyweds in the private bedroom and Brick solo-occupying the pull-out couch, Mordecai for whatever reason chose to doze off in the currently-empty hot tub, leaving Virgil and Gaige on night watch until they too nodded off in whatever comfort the front seats could offer.
The light pollution almost nonexistent that-far-out, Virgil and Gaige had a completely unimpeded view of the night sky and its splendor. Gaige living in the Silicon Valley area found this as a first, while Virgil thought back to his foster homes out in the country, and how often the dysfunction of his then-current caretakers prompted him to look away from people for solace.
The lights in the night sky were quite beautiful, the sound of crickets chirping coming in through the cracked window as Virgil and Gaige enjoyed the ambiance. Neither of them really saying anything to one another, eventually the silence was broken.
"Hey Gaige?"
"Hm?"
"Where's Bloodwing?" he asked.
He wanted to make sure not to leave her there if they forgot to bring her in tomorrow morning.
"Oh, she's over there in the dining room," the girl genius said pointing over her shoulder.
Hazarding a glance over his own shoulder, Virgil saw Bloodwing sitting atop the table in the kitchenette, actually laying on her side and lightly snoring.
"Remind me not to eat off that table ever again."
Bloodwing might've preened herself as much as any other bird, but birds by-default were still filthy, filthy animals.
Then again, that may've just been a biased opinion brought about by his over-exposure to pigeons in New York as "rats with wings".
That and the fact that Infected pigeons were literal biohazards.
Only good thing to come from their transformation was they didn't defecate on whatever they pleased.
Suffice it to say, the Red Zone was relatively pigeon-free, though the naval blockade surrounding NYZ did have its hands full keeping the avian variety of Infected confined.
It was a good thing he'd decided to screw over Ross when he did, otherwise the Defense Budget wouldn't have been able to keep the NYZ situation under control if it had to do that and feed Ross' toxic obsession with masculine ideals… or some bullshit.
" . . . You're making that face again."
"What face?"
"That face you're making when you're thinking something heavy. What's up?"
"I guess… just thinking about New York. Gets me down is all."
"Ohh… You have family there?"
"No… Not anymore."
"Oh… Um, sorry."
"It's not your fault. I'm just lucky I'm here, and not there. From the pictures that got leaked, shit in Manhattan is way worse than it was the first time Mercer screwed NYC over."
"Yeah, tell me about it. The Red Zone? Looks like a whole other planet out there. Like something from Lovecraft with all those veins and tissues just… devouring the buildings like that."
"Yeah. It's a good thing that shit can't commute across water, otherwise the whole world might look like that."
"Yeah… Normally I'm all 'smash the system', but given what the alternative is… I think that naval blockade around New York is fine where it is."
"Speaking of which, I get that the system royally screwed you over at the Star Academy science fair, but this whole anarchy thing… It's gotta end," Virgil said finally addressing what Gaige had said to him about her thoughts on governmental authority four hours back.
"What? Why?" Gaige asked, almost sounding offended.
"Because I have an impressionable kid sister back at home with access to military-grade explosives, and I don't need you putting seditious ideas in her head," Virgil answered. "It's a miracle we can get her to eat green vegetables without giving her a taste for blood."
"Sounds like she'd fit right in at Star-A," Gaige hummed. " . . . Third place. Third… place. What a load of bull…"
"Hey, if it means anything coming from me, with how-much you hyped up your anti-bullying robot, I think you really did deserve first place."
"Aw, thanks. That's sweet," Gaige smiled.
"Yeah, well… What're eccentric friends for?"
"Yeah…" Gaige sighed, turning her attention back to the night sky. " . . . If that girl back home says 'no', I'm totally going after that butt by the way."
And like that, the moment died.
"What is it with you girls and thinking things with Athena won't work out?"
"Hopeful optimism mixed with teen hormones~"
"Gawd I need more male friends…" he sighed aloud.
*COUNTRY ROAD~*
A shortie but a goodie, introducing another familiar face I've been very eager to bring in, and a fan-favorite of mine from Borderlands 2.
Borderlands 3 is just around the corner, but I'm unsure if I'll be able to introduce "Moze the Gunner", "Amara the Siren", "FL4K the Beastmaster", and "Zane the Operative" at this point in time. Maybe in the future, but not in the immediate, and definitely not in the 2010 timeframe.