justinq719: Jesus Christ... Do Not Screw With Virgil...
Re: Yeah no shit.
LuckyShadowWolf: I have to say I was absolutely surprised to see an update so soon after the last one. I was honestly expecting at least another week or two between updates based on your usual speed. Anyways let us count the references I got a hoot out of seeing used so well. First we have Brian Mills "particular set of skills" line from Taken used to explain where Virgil is hero/villain ranking wise, then CoD's "No Russian." line at the start of the chapter, and of course the Men In Black quote which is true in real life. And quite possibly more that I either don't recognize or missed completely. Finally I have to say that the way you went about "spook grooming" Peter was very well done especially since Peter before was highly suspicious of "David" and now after having David save him he's much more trusting and even directly seeking advice from him. Now there are two questions I have what is going to happen to the female Russian Merc? And what is the story behind the ear necklace?
Re: What can I say? I hit a hot streak.
Yeah, I liked that line so I thought I'd put it in. Couldn't help the "No Russian." line either. Men in Black is one of my favorite series, so I couldn't help but put that in either; on that front, I have a pleasant surprise for later.
As for the "spook grooming", I feel like in the DC Universe, after making the Peter-Palmer connection (the typo in that old Spider-Man comic, and again in Superior Spider-Man was too good to pass up on), Peter does have the potential to become a much-beloved public figure. Only reason he isn't like that in the mainstream Marvel universe is because of lack of a good PR guy. It also helps that Peter was twice-over threatened by Villains, even if it was only in the capacity of being a hostage or hostage-to-be.
ALSO! The reason I'm putting this kind of emphasis on Peter's out-of-hero life, at least in this story, is because it is such a downer to see Peter Parker pouring his blood, sweat, and tears (mostly blood) into New York, and yet despite all of his sacrifices, he still winds up in a shitty apartment with no girlfriend and more often than not gets evicted. I mean I get that he's supposed to be relatable, but a normal person would at-the-least get their rent money squared away and save their super-hero-ing for after hours. Swap your vigilante routine for your cardio and you don't even need a gym membership.
As for your questions… Not sure what'll happen to the female merc. She might just go to jail, do her time, and then go home to her family and turn her life around. As for the "ear necklace", Spaceman suggested the line as a reference to Universal Soldier.
UndeadLord22: First of all, that torture is gonna give some sadists or crazies ideas
Second of all, you stole that bit from batman haven't you?
Re: Hey, you gotta work with what you have on hand. Though I will admit, while the Sulfuric Acid bit was inspired by watching Adam & Jamie work with it in Mythbusters as they tested body-disposal measures from Breaking Bad, it isn't outside the realm of possibility to find some on an Ivy League college campus.
Second, I technically borrowed it from Justice League Season 2 Episode 7 "Maid of Honor – Part 1". And to be fair, Virgil was speaking Russian, Batman was speaking Kasnian, so I didn't so much steal Batman's dialogue as I paraphrased it.
vmage2: That depends. What part in-particular were you giggling about?
OmegaDelta: Maybe now Peter's life as spider man won't be such a wreck. Wonder what is next for Virgil after this mission and if they will catch the one who put the hit out on the dark web? Keep up the good work.
Re: Kinda the point of the whole "spook grooming" angle as LuckyShadowWolf put it. Of course it helps that he isn't alone in this. Who knew a single typo back in Amazing Spider-Man #1 could be used to this effect?
superpierce: dang, I honestly thought Vergil would have some standards when it came to interrogation.
Re: Hey, he let one of them live, didn't he?
And technically he only killed one of them. Maine just got to the other two, and "David" couldn't be seen chastising him in front of the POWs.
Plus, he is not a mentally stable individual. At least not compared to a normal person. And besides, Communists are like Nazis, only Russian. And they have hate-boners for everyone, not just Jews.
Blaze1992: Hmm I feel that went too quick, he shouldn't have gone balls to the wall like that right out of the gate.
Don't get me wrong it was effective but it could've be so much longer/darker with a possible end result of maybe one more merc left alive.
Re: To be fair, that was supposed to be an easy mission, and the Russians coming after Peter again caused him to exceed his "BS Limit".
Rakaan: I like to imagine that in the future years Zatanna and M'gann will be off to the side trying to entice Virgil to become a superhero in full. I also wonder if Virgil's new friends will change how the Director (and any other secret-type organizations) views him, at least in how disposable he is. Before, it was implied that killing him and re-setting the Nanosuit was just more effort than it was worth;and with his high synchro-rate it would be an (unfortunate) a waste of resources if they did.
However, he's no longer some nobody that could be disappeared and have no one (with power) looking for him. At most there would just be some (admittedly crazy dangerous) mercenaries that (might) try and shake something loose in a search for him, along with whatever tech Athena could bring to the table. Through M'gann and Zatanna though, there could potentially be the greater Justice League trying to figure out where he went. If only to assuage any fears the girls have if they can't contact him. [Chapter 45]
Well, I'm all caught up on the chapters so far, and I enjoyed the read! I'm a bit sad I'll have to wait for further chapters like a damn dirty peasant though. [Chapter 48]
Re: Now that sounds like an interesting topic to come up in the future. Of course the big question is, how much of his true life will they know about by then~?
As for Virgil becoming "no longer some nobody that could be disappeared and have no one (with power) looking for him", that is something I hadn't really thought of until you brought it up, and that's another excellent point to make. [Chapter 45]
As for having to wait for future chapters "like a damn dirty peasant", welcome to my world. [Chapter 48]
CountOrlok777: ... where the hell did you get the idea of an acid down the ***
Re: Tobasco enemas, but-chugging, and whenever the Mythbusters worked with Sulfuric Acid during Breaking Bad myths.
You know. Just one of those things that happens when an autistic mind (PDD-NOS) is allowed to wander.
*GENIUS' CLASH*
"Director."
"Yes, Ms, Mayer?"
"There are some concerns I wish to voice."
"Very well then. Speak."
"After going over Virgil's recent… foray on the other side of the country, something I've realized…"
"Yes?"
"I don't think we could dispose of him with impunity like we could before, if he stepped out of line."
"What makes you say that?"
"Well, before he was just a 'nobody' who, at the worst would have some eccentric mercenaries and one girl genius looking for him if he ever 'disappeared under mysterious circumstances'. Now however, he's personally acquainted with two girls with ties to the Justice League."
"And you're worried if we get rid of him so we can reset the Prototype Nanosuit, the League could come down on us."
"In as many words."
"Do you think Virgil knows this?"
"I don't think so, sir. He doesn't seem like the kind of person to leverage his own friends like this. And even if he was, he hasn't let on that he knows this."
"Then it'd be in our best interest to not let on that anything's changed between us. Now that he knows how The Joy's story ended, it'll be even more difficult to keep him in line if we push him too far."
"And that's assuming he doesn't jump ship all on his own."
"Then I suppose it's in all our best interests that his present lifestyle remain… lucrative."
"It shouldn't be too hard. The nanomachines in his bloodstream have kept his skin clear, and his hair's gained a revitalized luster, so it'll be easy for him to grow into his 'cover' and lead a very financially-stable lifestyle outside his real job. In fact, I imagine he'll be quite the looker when he's older."
"Which of course opens up its own slew of problems…"
"Which is why I'm allowing him to continue boarding at Moxxi's Red Light. Because living with 'real people' will keep him grounded and humble. Even if they are 'eccentric weirdos'."
"Very good. We wouldn't want to find him 'in a destroyed village with a necklace of human ears hanging from his neck', now would we?"
"Yes… Finding three Freelancers in that condition is three too many."
"And god help us if we accidentally betray him once he reaches Solid Snake's level."
*GENIUS' CLASH*
The Bunker: Virgil's Cabin
November 21, 23:55 EST
"Hey F.I.L.S.S."
"Yes, Virgil?" the Bunker AI replied.
"By any chance, was anyone keeping track of the RV I was riding cross-country in?"
"I've been keeping track of it, yes. Do you have an inquiry to make?"
"I just need to know when they're getting back to town so I can run damage control before I get back," Virgil answered.
If he neglected to properly elaborate on Gaige, he might have a bit of a sticky situation with his housemates.
Especially if Gaige got to Athena first.
He'd have done so that-night, but Athena was most-likely asleep by this hour, and even though he'd only ambushed those mercs instead of engaging in a straight-up fight, that mission was still physically and mentally exhausting.
"Very well then. I will alert you when your travelling companions arrive in the state of New Jersey."
"Okay… Good…" Virgil sighed as he threw himself onto his cot
*GENIUS' CLASH*
New Jersey
November 22, 7:55 EST
"Man, we made great time," Brick grinned as they passed the Bludhaven in 1 Mile sign just outside town. Resting in his lap was a large taxidermy beaver… with Sabertooth Tiger fangs sticking out of its muzzle.
"Yeah, and all we had to fight on the way back was one group of alien mad scientists," Mordecai huffed as he fed Bloodwing carrion from what looked like a hamster crossed with a velociraptor.
Or at least half 'a hamster crossed with a velociraptor'.
"You think things in town have cooled down, yet?" Lilith asked as she looked out into The Dust. There was plenty of time for the literal fire to go out, but it never hurt to make sure.
"As long as us leaving town didn't raise any red flags, we should be good," Roland hummed. "And even then, we've gotten into scraps before and still gotten off Scott Free."
"Yes, except those times we had to leave the country for a while," Lilith deadpanned.
"Eh, I'm sure everything'll work out," Mordecai shrugged, taking a sip from his can of-
"Dammit, Mordecai! What did I say about drinking and driving!?" Lilith demanded, reaching to snatch it from the sniper's hand.
"If living in Bludhaven is anything like this…" Gaige hummed, "I'm going to be in for a good time~"
*GENIUS' CLASH*
Bludhaven
November 22, 8:13 EST
"Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap, oh crap! Running, running, running!" Virgil panted as he bolted back to the Red Light, sleeping through the first two notifications of F.I.L.S.S.' verbal alarms before he was shot in the face with a directional burst of fire-suppressant.
"Gimme your money!"
"I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIIIS!" Virgil cried sticking the guy in the face with a dart from his Blowgun Revolver without losing stride. "For the love of god please let me get there in time!"
*GENIUS' CLASH*
With no time for subtlety, Virgil blitzed through the Red Light like someone'd lit his ass on fire. Moxxi said something to him as he passed, but Virgil didn't have time to listen, scrambling up the stairs to the boarding house.
What he heard when he was only a step away from the landing made his stomach sink.
"So… You're the legendary girlfriend I see," Gaige hummed.
'SHIT!'
"Yes. What about it?" Athena asked, eyeing the girl up and down.
She was confident that her figure was quote/unquote "better" than Gaige's, assuming you used the quote/unquote "normal" metric of "body politics" to evaluate body shape.
But, if Virgil turned out to be the sort of guy that was into slender girls instead of busty-and-curvy, the ginger in front of her might be able to give her a run for her money.
"Well, you seeee…" she paused as she threw an arm over the blond's shoulder. "I have a… proposition, to extend to you."
'Crap crap crap crap CRAP!' Virgil cried frantically in his head as Gaige made her sales pitch.
*One Minute Later…*
*Slam!*
"Are you fucking high?! This is America, not Feudal Era Japan!" Athena shrieked. "And more-importantly, why should I share him with a complete stranger!?"
'Oh thank god,' Virgil sighed gratefully.
"Well fine then, maybe I'll just take cutie-boy there for myself," Gaige huffed.
"Pretty confident for a scrawny fishbone…!"
"Pretty territorial for a bleached-blond bimbo."
"Bitch."
"Slut."
"Skank."
"Whore."
"You leave my mother out of this!" Athena growled, swiftly finding her "BS Limit".
The sound of a catfight ensuing as chairs were knocked over, Athena and Gaige both yowling as their hair was pulled, Virgil's common sense was overcome by worry and he bolted into the room, interposing himself between the wrestling girls intent on clawing one another's eyes out, only to wind up the filling for a rather soft variety of sandwich, the boy finding himself pressed between them amidst their attempts at strangulating one another.
"Ow! Hey! You two! Cut it out!" Virgil said fighting back the flush to his face.
And the rush of blood in the opposite direction.
"Virgil?!" Athena gaped from her compromising position atop him, a blush of equal intensity rising across her own visage.
"When'd you get here?" Gaige asked, pinned between his muscular back and the floor.
Not that she didn't like it~
"Just got back, and could you two please stop fighting?" he insisted.
"How uh… How much did you hear?" Gaige asked nervously as she was helped up.
"Uhhh… No comment," Virgil answered after a moment.
"Oh, taking the Fifth are we~?" Gaige purred.
"I'm not sure I like that tone you're taking with him," Athena growled.
"Come on, what's wrong with a little polyamory?" Gaige whined.
"Everything! Virgil isn't interested in that kind of relationship!" Athena asserted.
"How about we hear his thoughts on it?" Gaige rebuffed.
"That's a loaded question and I'm not falling for it," Virgil said flatly.
"Tt! Spoilsport," Gaige pouted.
" . . . What's with the beaver?" Virgil asked as he spotted a large taxidermy beaver with saber tooth tiger fangs.
"Ugh, all kinds of bullshit," Gaige groaned. "On the plus-side, I finally got to shoot something that trip," she added with a smile.
"Well that'd explain the dinosaur head on the wall," Virgil said looking at the taxidermy head of a goat crossed with a Pachycephalosaurus; for those of you not versed in nerd-speak, the dinosaur with the skull dome that could break through brick walls if it wanted to. "So what was it this time? Another mad scientist?"
"Nope. Aliens~" Gaige said with a beaming smile.
"Because of course it was aliens," Athena huffed.
"Brick wanted to bring the head of a Hippo-Rex home, but… Couldn't get it in the luggage compartment. Or the door. And we didn't have enough cables to tie it to the roof-"
"Hippo-Rex?" he asked incredulously.
"This coming from the guy who blew up an Übercow with a handful of grenades. What's next? A tank?"
'Well, Solid Snake did blow up a tank with a handful of grenades, so it isn't impossible…' Virgil mused to himself.
"Sooo…" Athena hummed aloud. "How was your trip out of town?"
"Oh… You know… Productive."
"Wait, you got back before us and took a trip out of town, AND got back?" Gaige asked incredulously.
"I should be saying the same about the damn dinosaur hybrids," Virgil bit back.
"So!" Gaige snapped. "I hear you and the GF are going on a cross-country tour of Fortune 500 companies. Wanderlust getting to you so soon?"
"It'll be a working vacation, and you aren't invited," Athena hissed, grabbing Virgil's arm possessively and drawing it into her chest.
"Oh, so that's how it is, eh?" Gaige asked quirking a brow. "Well, guess I'll have to have him show me around before your trip," she said grabbing onto his arm and hauling him down the stairs.
"Ah! Wait! Get back here!" Athena cried, trailing after the two.
*GENIUS' CLASH*
'The heck is this? Some kind of harem anime rom-com?' Virgil thought to himself as Gaige and Athena walked him down the street away from the Red Light, their arms around his elbows like padlocks.
And not those shitty padlocks you can get for five bucks. I'm talking the high-end industrial strength padlocks that cost hundreds of dollars.
"So, this is where the Ghost Car of Bludhaven used to prowl?" Gaige asked with a raised brow.
"Not here specifically… Hopefully after the exorcism a couple weeks back that thing won't be a problem ever again…" Virgil trailed off. "So where exactly are we going?"
"Where else? Our friendly neighborhood arms dealer~" Gaige said with a beaming smile.
"I take it Brick or Mordecai told you about it?" Virgil asked.
"Yup! Second Amendment time, baby!" Gaige smirked with a thumbs up.
'God help me…'
*GENIUS' CLASH*
"Welcome to my shop!" the man greeted jovially as the bell above his door rang. "So, how can I help you?"
"Its Second Amendment time, and I aim to collect!" Gaige said with a wide smile as she rubbed her hands together like a Saturday morning cartoon villain. "So!" she said slapping a collection of large and small bills onto the counter. "What can I get for this?"
Marcus stared at the bills for a few seconds, decades of exchanging bank promissory notes for wares allowing him to instantly tally the amount to just a little over a hundred bucks. He then turned to Gaige, an- "Are you serious?" -look on his face before he let out a sigh and placed a rather small gun on the counter.
"The fuck is this? The Wild Wild West?" the ginger genius gawped as she beheld a Colt Theur Derringer, a .22 caliber miniature handgun.
"You asked me what you could get for that much. That's what you can get," Marcus said flatly as though Gaige were wasting his time.
"Awww…" Gaige whined. "Well… I guess I could mount it on a belt buckle, I suppose," she sighed as she slipped the gun into her pocket, Marcus scooping up the bills.
" . . . Here. Take these too," Marcus said taking out a box of .22 Caliber rounds, blowing a thick layer of dust off of them before tossing them at Gaige.
"Huh. Never thought I'd see the day you were giving out free ammo," Virgil hummed.
"Hey, you know how much space those things are taking up I could be using to store other stock?" Marcus huffed indignantly. "What about you? You need anything?" he asked turning to Virgil.
"Maybe some more ammo."
"Same," Athena added.
"Ah, that's right. You're going out of town soon. So! I take it the rich-and-affluent finally caught wind of your mechanical talents?"
"Something like that," Athena answered as she pointed out the ammo she needed.
"Well, seeing as how you're going to Gotham and Metropolis, always remember; 'Shoot first, then run the hell away'."
"As if I could do anything else," Athena sighed, taking out a plastic shopping bag from her pocket and scooping everything up.
Marcus tended to charge for that sort of thing.
The three of them perusing Marcus' wares for several more minutes, Gaige looking wistfully at a Vladof assault rifle but lamenting a lack of funds for the shiny chromed "bullet hose", Athena purchasing some high-end ammo for her own sidearm, Virgil looked over Marcus' stock before deciding, between his Markov Pistol, Well-Kept Coach Gun, and P-90, he was stretching the limits of the Firearms Freedom Act as far as he could sensibly take it.
Besides, walking into "supervillain central" the way he would be, carrying so many firearms could just as easily backfire if either Batman or Superman got the wrong idea.
After getting a few Disruptor and Beanbag rounds for his shotgun, Virgil decided it was time to go, and corralled the two girls into seeing more of the town.
"Remember! You can never be too well-armed!" Marcus said at their retreating backs.
*GENIUS' CLASH*
"Sooo… Is it really like Mad Max to the east of here?" Gaige asked as they took a bus uptown.
"More or less… I'd rather not go out there for a good long while…" Virgil admitted.
He was thankful they'd agreed on dropping off the ammo back at the house, otherwise, if he got pulled aside by a cop holding enough ammo to lay siege to a small office building, what happened out in The Dust might rear up its head in a very ugly way.
As the grit and grunge of Lower Bludhaven gave way to the splendor of Upper Bludhaven, the trash on the streets and shady characters replaced with well-to-do businessmen and other respectable persons, a muted ring of a school bell suddenly rang from his pocket. Scrambling for his phone as the lyrics- Hello, Megan~! -began to play, he pressed it to his ear before more of the hammy ringtone could play.
"Megan, how are you?" he greeted into the line, Athena and Gaige perking up their ears to listen, Virgil cupping the speaker with his free hand and leaning away. "No, I'm sorry, we can't hang out this week. Why? I'm going out of town with a friend and I don't know when I'll be back. Okay, glad to hear you're adjusting. Say 'hello' to your uncle for me."
"Sooo… Friend of yours?" Athena asked.
"Yeah, you could say that."
Do you believe in magic~
*Beep*
"Zee? How are you?"
"Well someone's certainly popular with the ladies~" Gaige cooed.
"They're just friends," Virgil countered before turning his attention back to the receiver. "No, I'm sorry, we can't hang out this week. My girlfriend and I are going on a business trip. Yes it's a business trip! This isn't just an excuse to- Canoodling? Have you been borrowing Megan's out-of-date lingo again?"
"So… A day after meeting them and you're already getting phone calls to hang out," Athena hummed brusquely, eyes narrowed slightly at him. "Also, when'd I become your 'girlfriend'?" she asked with a raised brow.
"I was going to the other day, but other stuff kept coming up," Virgil sighed.
"So then… are you going to ask me now?" Athena asked hopefully, leaning toward him.
'Please say no. Please say no. Please say no,' Gaige thought desperately.
*Pling*
"Whoo! Saved by the chime!" Gaige whooped.
"Tt," Athena chuffed angrily the girl's way.
" . . . It's from Artemis," Virgil sighed.
"Oh, another girl," Athena sighed.
"Relax. There's like… zero sexual tension between us," Virgil said before looking down into he text. "Oh, well that's easy," he said tapping a reply onto the screen before pocketing the phone once again.
"What was that about?" Athena asked with a raised brow.
"Artemis' mom wanted to know if your mom said anything about her lately."
"Why can't her mom just ask directly?"
"I think things are still awkward between them," Virgil hummed. "I just deliver the mail, I don't read it."
"How does being a courier pay?" Gaige asked.
"Depends on the client. It's more of a moonlighting thing," he answered, causing Gaige to shrug.
The next moment a familiar, more-serious ringtone sounded. Virgil looked at Athena awkwardly, the question he wanted to ask her interrupted yet-again.
" . . . Go ahead," Athena sighed, Virgil nodding awkwardly as he answered the call.
"Ms. Mayer?" Virgil said straightening up. "Yes. Yes, whatever you need," he replied. "I… see… Okay, I'll be right over…" he nodded before turning off the phone.
"Is your boss sending you out of town again?" Athena asked with a raised brow.
"No, no, not this time…"
"So why do you look like you swallowed a lemon?" Gaige asked.
"Well…" he began awkwardly. "The agency hired another teen model, and Ms. Mayer wants me to… show her around town."
"Oh, well that isn't so bad-Wait, 'her'?" Athena double-took.
*GENIUS' CLASH*
Arriving at Gothic Renaissance, Virgil used his employee ID to get to the third floor and entered the break room. A few people were lounging around, but the girl that Virgil was being asked to show around town was made obvious-enough when she walked straight up to him.
"Hello there, possible love-interest!" she greeted.
'What...?' Virgil gawped incredulously, Athena gawping like a fish out of water while Gaige snorted loudly with laughter.
"Kidding, kidding~" the pretty teen model who'd just been hired on greeted. "Just trying to break the ice. I'm Gwendolyn Poole, but my friends call me 'Gwen'. Nice to meet you, hot stuff~" she said holding out her hand.
"Um… Hi…" Virgil returned awkwardly giving her a cursory once-over.
Gwen was a rather pretty girl with a heart-shaped face, light skin, beautiful expressive blue eyes, and shoulder-length blond hair dyed pink below her ears. She was shapely but not too shapely for her age; in essence, the "Girl Next Door" archetype, just not as over-sensualized as you'd find on the big screen. Her attire consisted of a white T-shirt with pink sleeves and collar, dark pink short-shorts, black leggings, and pink sneakers with white laces and soles.
"I know I'm cute in a 'Girl Next Door' kind of way, and a 'fan favorite', but you don't need a whole paragraph to describe me~" she said with a little grin as she caught Virgil giving her the once-over.
"*Ahem* My bad," Virgil muttered, coughing into his fist. "Sooo… You move into Bludhaven recently or…?"
"Oh, I showed up a few chapters back," Gwen returned, with a smile like one privy to a really good inside joke.
'Chapters…?'
"Don't worry about it," Gwen said with a wave of her hand, almost as though she could read his mind.
"Sooo…" Virgil said awkwardly, getting a distinctly eccentric 'Tiny Tina' sort of vibe from the girl.
"I'll choose to take that as a compliment," Gwen said suddenly.
"Anywhere in particular you want to go?"
"Know a good arms dealer around here?" Gwen asked, bending forward slightly.
*GENIUS' CLASH*
"So, coming back in with a pretty girl on each arm and a leg, eh~?" Marcus asked in a sing-song tone as he eyed the quartet walking into his shop. "I'd almost be jealous if I didn't know this would end in complete and unmitigated disaster."
"It's not like that," Virgil grumbled.
"Sure, that's how it starts, but then next thing you know you're fleeing your homeland to another country on a different continent to dodge alimony checks to half a dozen women."
Marcus was so-equally sarcastic and ambiguous with his past, that Virgil had no idea if he was being literal or not.
"Aaanywayy…" Virgil said awkwardly. "My coworker asked if I knew a good gun shop, so I took her here," he said waving Gwen forward, the girl striding confidently forward.
"You got a loading bench for making custom rounds?" Gwen asked, placing a confident elbow on the counter.
"And if I said I did, what're you in the market for?"
"Titanium composite hollow point bullets with a C4 kicker," she answered without missing a beat. "Wink."
"Why are you saying 'wink'?"
"I don't know what you're talking about," Gwen deflected. "Wink."
"Whispering the word 'wink' doesn't stop me from hearing it if you're saying it right to my face," Marcus groaned.
"I'm also gonna need enough munitions to get me through at least two story arcs," Gwen said holding up two fingers.
"Is this more of that teen lingo I don't understand?" Marcus asked aloud. "You know what, screw it. You show me the money, and I'll sell you enough guns and ammo for three story arcs," he returned raising three fingers.
"I'm gonna hold you to that," Gwen said with a grin.
'Oh great. Another gun nut.'
"I prefer the term, 'enthusiast'," Gwen countered.
"Wait… Can you read my thoughts?" Virgil asked, alarmed.
"In a… manner of speaking~" Gwen said steeping her fingers together with a smile.
" . . . Well that's infuriatingly cryptic…" Virgil deadpanned.
"Two…" Gwen muttered under her breath.
*GENIUS' CLASH*
"Thanks a lot for helping me carry home my loot," Gwen said with a smile as they made their way back uptown, Gwen holding a collection of ammo boxes in a bag on her lap while Virgil played the role of pack mule.
"Yes, well, chivalry isn't totally dead…" Virgil hummed, sandwiched in the back of a cab between Athena and Gaige, a duffel bag filled with guns spread across his lap.
"Yeah. That's the kind of character you are~" Gwen said with a knowing smile.
And that wasn't the only time she'd displayed that cat-like grin. When she told the cabbie her apartment was at 321 S Main Street, she once again had the look of someone privy to a really funny inside joke.
"So, which of you's the girlfriend?" Gwen asked over her shoulder.
"Yeah, who is 'the girlfriend'?" Athena asked tersely.
"I'll ask when we aren't in mixed company," Virgil replied, the girl at his right showing a relieved smile.
"My previous offer still stands. I'm sure I can wear her down," Gaige stated from his left.
"I can see what you said about mixed company," the cab driver hummed, sounding slightly entertained.
*GENIUS' CLASH*
"So… This is my place. Feel free to make yourselves at home?" Gwen said letting the three of them in, Virgil taking the chance to look around.
The apartment was a one-person, not too big, not too small, but 'just right'; kinda like with that fairy tale girl with a penchant for B&E. The living room and dining room/kitchen were all pre-furbished, with a few personal touches here and there. All in all it lived like a single person's home.
"Anywhere you want me to set this down?" he asked.
"Just put it at the foot of my bed. The bedroom's opposite the bathroom," Gwen answered, loading the ammo next to the canned goods of all places.
Nodding, Virgil did as he was asked with the duffel-full of guns. Sure, it was a little worrying, but he'd be a hypocrite if he said anything against another underaged person with guns. For all he knew she was a softcore doomsday prepper, or just someone who wanted some assurance that if some jackhole came into her place to steal her stuff, she'd be able to defend herself.
When he stepped into the bedroom, he was momentarily taken aback by the décor. The furniture was all pre-fab, but the walls… were practically wallpapered with superhero paraphernalia.
And not just singles or group shots of the Justice League and its founding members; official posters or up-sized photographs of the world's greatest heroes in action. There were pictures of Captain America, the Justice Society, some group called the 'Freedom Fighters', and images of superheroes he'd never even heard of.
Some of them had to be of people in really-convincing superhero cosplay, 'cause he'd never heard of even half the people adorning the girl's walls, and even though he didn't "hashtag follow" the rise and fall of various superheroes, didn't mean he didn't know what they looked like, and he'd never seen even half of the guys on her walls.
Still, the imagery was so-convincing, you wouldn't be hard-pressed to guess they were the SPBs of a whole other world.
Of course, the notion was ridiculous.
Superhero paraphernalia aside, there were also a number of plushies of aforementioned heroes, and figurines of anime and videogame characters. He could recognize a few of them, but anime wasn't really a huge thing for him like some kids his age.
"Hey, I'm gonna make some snacks!" Gwen called from the kitchenette. "Stop internal monologuing and 'get over here'!"
'Is that some kinda reference, or something?'
"Yeah! From Mortal Kombat!"
"Why'd you say that without any prompting?" Athena asked.
"Maybe she's a telepath?" Gaige groused.
'God I hope not. I'm not sure my Mental Barriers are up to snuff,' Virgil thought as he wheeled around and left the omni-directional gaze of countless superheroes and heroines.
*GENIUS' CLASH*
"Sooo… What made you want to become a model exactly?" Virgil asked with a cup of milk in his hands, a platter of cookies between the four of them.
They were technically store-bought, but it was the thought that counted.
"Thanks for the sentiment," Gwen smiled brightly. "As for how I became a model, Re-l actually approached me, and I said yes."
"Wait, isn't that how you got into that gig?" Athena asked Virgil's way.
"More or less," Virgil shrugged. "Though in all honesty I don't see why. I look in the mirror and all I see is… well… Me."
"Well, you know how it goes. You don't 'hear your own voice', and you don't 'see yourself in the mirror'," Gaige shrugged as she tossed a whole cookie into her mouth and sloshed around the milk.
"Maybe it's that medical nanotech you're testing out," Gwen hummed causing Virgil to spit-take.
"She told you about that?!"
"No. But don't let her know that I know, okay~?" Gwen asked with a wink.
"I can't tell if you're screwing with me or not…" Virgil deadpanned.
"Well, assuming things don't work out with Ms. Multiple Personality Disorder here, I think something can be arranged~" she said waggling a brow at him.
"Hey, get in line, Dye Job!" Gaige hissed.
"Well, you know the old saying. 'Sharing is caring'~"
" . . . I like this girl," Gaige hummed after a moment.
"Could you not?" Athena said protectively grabbing Virgil's arm.
"Oh hanging out with you guys is going to be a treat~" Gwen said with a catty smile.
"Well, we can't stay around here too long. Virgil and I have a trip planned for tomorrow," Athena stated.
"No, no, I totally get it. I have a pretty good grasp on Bludhaven," the girl answered.
"Okay… Good," Athena returned.
*GENIUS' CLASH*
"Well… She seemed nice," Gaige hummed as they left Gwen's apartment.
"I still don't see why you insist on sharing him with other women," Athena huffed.
"Hey, monogamy's just an artificial construct like 'good and evil'. Plus, have you seen the butt on that boy?"
"Aforementioned 'boy' is right here you know…" Virgil said flushing a little at the cheeks. "And is this really a conversation you wanna have in public?" he asked as pedestrians gave them various forms of 'the {insert adjective here} eye'.
"Well, the lot of them are just background characters, so it's not like their thoughts matter anyway."
"Jesus Christ!" Athena yelped as she and Gaige jumped out of their skins, Virgil's hands darting for his balisong before catching sight of pink-dyed blond lochs. "Sneaking up on someone in Bludhaven is a really good way of getting shot!"
"Well, seeing as how no-one had a Chekho's Gun on their person, I figured I'd be alright," Gwen said with crossed arms.
"What're you even doing here!?" the girl genius demanded.
"Thought I'd follow you guys, see the 'real side' of Bludhaven," Gwen returned falling into step after them.
"Then what was the point of escorting you back home?" Athena asked.
"To help me carry home my guns and vampire slaying gear. Duh."
"Wait, what was that about vampire slaying-"
"Anywayyyyy… Know any good bars around here willing to serve minors?"
" . . . *Siiiiigh* Follow me," Athena groaned, taking the lead.
*GENIUS' CLASH*
'Aaannnd… now she knows where I live,' Virgil thought as the quartet made their way into the Red Light.
"Hey, I'm not that bad."
"And stay out of my head."
"Don't worry, it's freaking me out too."
"How could you be freaked out by it? It isn't your mind she's allegedly reading," Virgil told Gaige.
"Yeah, but it's so weird seeing her get it right."
"This day can not be over soon enough…" Virgil groaned. "Sooo… Guys. How are things?" he said striding over to the bar where Roland, Lilith, Mordecai, and Brick all sat nursing drinks.
"Oh, you know… Keeping an ear to the ground. Seeing if things have cooled off," Roland hummed.
"Yeah, cause those bombs you set killed a lot of rednecks. And Irishmen."
"Say that a little louder why don't ya?" Virgil groaned Mordecai's way.
"Sooo…" Gwen said placing an elbow on the counter. "How drunk would I have to get you to hear that sexy country accent of yours?" the girl asked suggestively.
"I have no idea what you're talkin' about, sug'," Moxxi returned with a straight face.
"You do know she's from the Free Love era, right?" Mordecai asked over his beer.
"Don't worry about me. I'm pretty much STD-proof ever since Neo got me some 'Liquid Wolverine'," Gwen said with a completely straight face.
"That's what she said," Brick giggled.
"And like that, I've hit my 'BS Limit' for the day…"
"That and Neo got tired of writing."
"Gwen, don't make me come down there," Virgil said heading up the stairs, too exhausted to do anything else.