Super Awesome Beta: Blaizekit, with some input from Duesal10 because his fight scenes are awesome.
Chapter 16: In Which Minato Almost Gets Eaten. Twice.
Even with as much of a warning as he got, Minato still barely managed to jump clear as the whole section of wall he'd just been sticking to was completely demolished. Apparently the person attacking him had little to no qualms about collateral damage when they fought. That was... good to know.
"Impressive," the rough voice commented casually, "Seems this little fly is going to be more entertaining than I thought."
Gatou's outraged cry about how the damages were coming out of the man's pay were ignored as the two regarded each other seriously. The new mercenary was a large man wearing a black cloak patterned with red clouds. The blueish grey pallor of his skin combined with the gill-like slits under his eyes and the razor sharp pointed teeth made him look almost ridiculously like a shark. Minato made a mental note that fighting him in water would probably be a bad idea.
Not that this new enemy wasn't dangerous enough without the water, he noted as he was forced to dodge another blow from the huge bandaged-wrapped club thing the shark-man used as a weapon. It looked bulky and unwieldy, but that didn't seem to hinder the mercenary any; he swung it around with practiced ease.
Minato threw a fistful of kunai, buying some space for him to rush through some hand seals. He was reluctant to use any of his signature moves if he could avoid it, but that didn't mean he didn't have a wide variety of other attacks at his disposal.
'Futon: Daitoppa,' he thought silently. While occasionally useful for the intimidation factor, shouting out technique names was generally a bad idea. Though he was guilty of it if only to share his awesomely named techniques with the world. The ones Kushina hadn't banned him from speaking aloud, anyway.
The wind attack caught up to his previous barrage of kunai, and turned it into a far more lethal barrage of wind boosted sharp objects. Minato doubted it would do anything more than buy time as a distraction, but he didn't have to defeat his opponent. He just had to slip past him and eliminate his target, Gatou.
He grimaced as the enemy brought his weapon forward to take the attack and was recovering far quicker than the Yondaime would have liked. He needed a different tactic. Well, he was in his son's body, and if that technique worked for Naruto, then...
A quick cross seal for concentration, and five clones popped into existence. One of which was immediately destroyed by a giant oh-it's-a-sword to the face. Minato had to use a kawarimi to get out of the way of it himself. He wasn't sure what that sword did, but he was pretty sure, judging from the void it had registered as to his chakra senses, that he didn't want to find out. The popping clone that came back to him as barely a whisp of chakra and weak memories only intensified his conclusion.
So... the sword... absorbed chakra? That was what made the most sense. Damn. Definitely couldn't let it touch him, then. His chakra-comprised bunshin body would probably not fare well against it.
He dropped from his perch on a nearby tree to the ground, and quickly made his way toward the house. Another clone popping alerted him in time to jump as a wave of water flooded the immediate area.
So much for not fighting him in water.
The clone's memories of a torrent of water being expelled from the enemy's mouth made Minato worry about what kind of chakra powerhouse he was fighting. That kind of technique took a lot of chakra. His estimation of his opponents abilities was quickly shooting straight past B and into A rank, and he wouldn't be surprised if it actually landed somewhere in the S tier.
He landed lightly on the surface of the man-made pond and took off. Get to Gatou, and kill him. That was the goal. Do that, and he might not actually have to fight this guy.
He was brought up short when the water in front of him bubbled and three water clones leapt up to attacked him. Burning chakra for speed and strength, Minato ducked under the first attacker, stabbed the second dissolving it back into water, then brought his kunai upward to catch the last one's sword inches from his head. Another instant later and he was forced to block another attack with his other hand from the one he had dodged.
"Who are you?" the clone in front of him asked with mild curiosity.
Minato smirked; he couldn't help himself. "A ghost."
"Fair enough," the enemy replied with a shrug.
Too late, the ex-Hokage realized he was being distracted as tendrils of water shot up and wrapped around him. Water prison. And he'd gotten caught in it. Lame.
The fourth clone he hadn't seen stepped up and onto the surface after the water had solidified and the other clones dispersed themselves. A sudden influx of memories let him know his other clones had been taken out and the real enemy was coming his way.
"Well, Fly-Ghost, whatever the hell you are, I'll admit you've given me more trouble than most," the sharkman said as he holstered his sword and approached, "but it's time for you to die now."
He ran a thumb over a wound on his chest from one of Minato's clones for blood before running through the familiar hand seals of a summon. "Kuchiyose no Jutsu."
He placed a palm on the sphere's surface and Minato got a glimpse of multiple rows of very large and very sharp teeth right in his face before he figured he could no longer avoid using his signature techniques.
He reached out with his senses to the Hiraishin seals on the kunai he'd thrown earlier and picked the one closest to the mansion. They weren't his usual white-handled three-pronged blades, but they could still hold a seal for a short amount of time. The black kunai also helped hide the black mark so, in a way, they had their own advantages. They just didn't look nearly as awesome.
In an instant, the incoming jaws disappeared as the Yondaime swapped one underwater environment for another. He wasted no time in snatching up the blade with his seal on it and throwing it straight up as hard as he could. Another moment later, he joined it and took a quick look at the battlefield from the sky.
The sharkman was where he'd left him, the water prison and clone holding it dissolving as the original lifted his gaze to look at Minato. Below him, the Yondaime could see the huge shadow of the shark that'd been summoned in the water. That wouldn't matter, Minato planned on ending this now.
Spinning, he snatched the kunai from midair and smirked down at his opponent but kept twisting as his true target came in sight. The mansion rose from the water like some sort of strange island, and there, gaping out of the hole in his wall like the idiotic civilian he was, was Gatou. Finally at a perfect angle for Minato to put a knife through his head.
He let the knife fly with a flick of his wrist, self-assured in the fact that his opponent was too far away to do much and Gatou did not possess the combat reflexes to avoid or block such an attack.
Unfortunately, the two samurai bodyguards in the room with him did.
There was a flash of moonlight against metal as a man with a sword jumped in front of his employer and blocked the projectile.
For a split second, all Minato could do was stare. How could he have not noticed those guys? Oh, right. Chakra void. They'd probably been covered by it when he'd done his sensory sweep. Well. He'd just have to deal with that.
The Yondaime had to admit, the next attack was probably a bit of overkill, but the sharkman was on his way to his client's defense and he wasn't going to risk getting into melee with that sword. Also, he may have been just a tiny bit frustrated by then, and felt like blowing something up.
He began flashing through a long series of one-handed hand seals. With both hands, each preparing a different attack. It was a technique he'd come up with once while bored patrolling the border during the war. He'd never had a chance to use it in an actual combat because he'd started work on the Rasengan shortly after. The hand-seal-less, quick-forming attack fit his fast paced teleport fighting style much better.
Still, it would be nice to finally get to see the attack in action. Especially since Kushina hadn't seen it yet and, therefore, hadn't banned the attack name.
"Ultimate Spiraling Twin Dragons of Fire and Lightning Death attack!"
At first, the looks of 'is-this-guy-for-real?' exchanged between the two swordsmen irritated Minato; but then they quickly turned into the appropriate 'oh-crap-we're-gonna-die' expressions as the technique formed and the Yondaime was satisfied. Now he just needed to show it to Kushina and get her approval.
Fire formed on his right and lightning on his left as he felt the significant chakra drain from powering two A-rank elemental jutsu at once. Simultaneously, the two formed into dragon heads, each larger than the man who'd summoned them, and shot forward.
As the twin serpentine forms spiraled their way toward the mansion, Minato was glad that this would finally be over. Even if he had had to destroy the entire mansion, and probably a good chunk of the surrounding land, to do it. The damage would have been even worse if not for the water to absorb most of it, so he supposed he had his opponent to thank for that.
Speaking of the enemy, he noticed the sharkman out of the corner of his eye jump up and directly into the path of his attack. For a brief moment, Minato was afraid he might have a barrier of some sort, like the kind he himself used, that could stop his attack. When no such obstacle appeared, he began thinking of other possibilities.
Still, he could see the effects of his attack crashing into the mansion, and sinking deep into the water surrounding it, so whatever that missing-nin had planned must not have-
Pain exploded in his mind as a flame and lightning wreathed object sliced out of the roiling mass of mixing elements and slammed into him with all the gentleness of a razor-bladed sledgehammer. The seal on his forehead burned hot under the stress of trying to keep his bunshin form from dispersing; and it only got worse when the sword grated against him, shredding easily through his flesh and even bone. On top of that, he could feel his chakra reserves plummet as the sword devoured his energy and grew larger.
Eventually the stabilizing seal gave out, but not before he saw what had happened. The enemy had cut a swath through his attack. Both providing an area of safety for his client, and cover for his own counter. Gatou was still alive, even if the majority of his house and estate were currently either burning or under a mass of steaming water.
At least the sharkman hadn't come out unscathed. He didn't look so good after taking that attack head on. Unfortunately it didn't even seem remotely life-threatening.
Then his body exploded in a puff of white chakra smoke, releasing him from the pain. The relief was short lived, however, as he suddenly felt his chakra form being pulled in two separate directions. By the bunshin chakra trying to return to Naruto, and then by the sword; the vast hungry void that seemed to be winning the tug-of-war on his soul.
Hastily, Minato reached out to the one Hiraishin seal he could activate in this state. In a flash he was in the other clone's body, collapsing to the floor in a heap as his spirit had to readjust from one wounded and flooded with combat adrenaline, to another completely rested and unhurt. Though his state of mind was quickly remedying that 'lack-of-adrenaline' issue.
He blinked his eyes, his vision clearing and his hearing coming back quite suddenly.
"Minato!?" Kushina was questioning, as her red hair and anxious features came into focus. She had grabbed the clone's shoulders and was shaking him violently to get a response. "Are you alright? What happened?!"
It was a moment before he gained control enough to speak. "Dear," he said, bringing his arms up to stop her throttling, "you're going to pop me before I get a chance to answer."
To which Kushina replied by slapping a seal paper on him, and giving him a good solid thump on the head. "Tell me what happened, or you're gonna wish I'd popped you!" she growled. "You came back without your original clone body, collapsed for no apparent reason, and then just... didn't respond to anything! What. Happened. Namikaze."
Minato chuckled nervously. "Ah, well... things didn't exactly go as planned."
If possible, Kushina's face grew even stormier and Kakashi sat up from the futon he'd been resting on. The Yondaime sighed as he settled into a recount of his botched mission.
Kushina was predictably incensed by the end, pacing the room while muttering dark threats toward this new enemy between promises of wrath upon her husband's head should he dare leave her behind again.
Kakashi looked serious as he sat rigidly at the table across from his sensei. "Hoshigaki Kisame. S-rank missing nin from Kirigakure. One of the Mist's Seven Swordsmen, and wielder of Samehada."
"That would have been nice to know about an hour ago," Minato commented, dryly. "An S-rank, huh? Good to know I wasn't taken out by just any random thug."
Kakashi sighed. "Yes, but unfortunately that means things just got a lot more complicated. And dangerous."
At his words, Kushina stopped pacing, and the three exchanged troubled looks before settling down to plan.
A/N: Man... Gatou is like a cockroach. He just won't die! DX I feels for you, Minato. I feels.
Sorry it wasn't Hidan, I tried to drop enough hints (*cough*Samehadavoid*cough*) for people to get it, but I guess you guys were just such big Hidan fans you couldn't let it go. You're not too disappointed, right? DX Kisame is awesome too?
Hopefully I have made Minato sufficiently awesome enough to earn his name in the title of this fic. I know some people were teasing me that I should rename it to, Kushina's: The Art of being Awesome. Kushina-muse still maintains that this would be an acceptable change. Thanks for putting that idea into her head, guys. THANKS.
Sorry I didn't post last week, real life caught up to me and I've been sick as well. Next chapter should be on time though, I have a good chunk of it written already. It was a conversation that popped into my head and I needed to get down before I forgot it. So, yay, head start there?
OH, ALSO! Chapter two of the audio fic is up! YAY, BLAIZEKIT! You may all google "Minato's: The Art of Being Dead audio fic" to bask in her glorious-ness!
Story Recs:
Thicker Than Blood By EmptySurface - It's a time travel fic where Sasuke and Naruto go back to being four year olds! Yay! They become genin early and some... interesting things happen. I'm looking forward to seeing how they handle the whole Itachi/Uchiha massacre thing. :3 I'm especially a fan of the Sasuke and Kakashi in this one.
Blood Sings by Fireun Feather - I can't really give my input on this one without spoiling it, but trust me, it's just awesome. It's a little drama heavy, but lots of Minato and Naruto moments with a definite and unique twist. Also, Ino. Oh, Ino... (Not romantically) Here's the summary: "For Namikaze Minato, Yondaime Hokage, the day started out like any other. But then Jiraiya walked into his office with a teen that could have been Minato's clone and that bore the name of his vanished lover. His day just got very, very interesting. AU"
-Py