Speech = ``...´´
Thoughts = [... ]
ºº
This was not how she had planned for things to go out in the end…, not in the slightest.
Yes, there had been some uncertainty of how the situation would develop, but never in her wildest dreams she had expected she would be struck down by her own sister in a fit of anger. The thought that she had provoked such response out from Iris did not compute inside her head, still clouded with resentment from any real or imaginary transgression she had perceived from her sister...
It was over in a flash, the flames fanning inside the red haired princess dying out just as fast as they had appeared…, but the damage was done.
It was hours already after Alexia had left her sisters room without exchanging another word, not wanting to hear what sort of excuses and half baked apologies she tried to muster through her lips or her muffled, tearful cries for forgiveness.
She just could not bare the thought of remaining any more time in that room that seemed to suffocate her just by standing inside…
But since she walked out of those doors everything became a blur in her memory. In a sense, she had trouble remembering exactly what happened afterwards with clarity as her legs pushed her onwards, away from her sisters room...
The people around her turned into dark humanoid dots she could not recognise or identify. The corridors becoming longer and longer, filling her with a sensation of nausea she could not shake off, her legs becoming numb and heavy yet moving faster and faster…
Before she realized she had reached her room...and buried her face in her bed sheets as if that would cleanse her of what was gnawing at her.
Alas, it clearly didn't work...as expected.
It didn't stop her from doing so anyway though.
She had cried, she had screamed, she had raged….but the sting of her hand pressed against her face still endured…, leaving the location it had struck a neatly impression of her sisters hand in great definition.
Funny enough...the pain of her flesh was the least of her concerns. No, that would be a secondary matter to attend at a later date in the embrace of her own solitude.
Which she was not granted this time thanks to fates decision to piss on her parade once again. As if the sting of the slap was not enough.
``That did not went as well as you hoped by the sounds of it, Princess..´´
She bit her lips, hands balling into fist, clenching tightly into the fabric of her pillow until her knuckles turned a deadly shade of white at the sound of a voice that did not belong in her room.
Insidious...and arrogant…
Honey to hear, yet all the more painful to swallow..
Alexia glared daggers at the man foolish enough to speak up their mind in her presence. In his early twenties, a blond knight that her father had posted to guard and watch over her for a while by now.
``I would rather do without the commentary, Zenon…and I believe, nay.., I REMEMBER I told you to leave my sights.´´
She hissed at the man, finding it incredibly difficult to maintain the cool of her voice as she stomped into the man's directions.
She was not going to be ridiculed in her own room by a man whose name was possibly the acronym of zero that some mother with poor imagination had come on about..
Zenon rose his hands, feigning innocence as if he was not aware what he was doing. But she knew him…
[The little bastard...]
``I did, you entered your sister room and I did not follow...just like you requested´´
Her eyes narrowed. He clearly had conveniently left out the order she had given him once she had realized he had followed her back to her room to leave her the fuck alone...
The nerve of that man to intrude in her personal chambers as if he owned them….oh, if only she could tear his face to shreds. Sadly her father had stated that he would be her..."guardian" for the time being. Why did she have to had one while her sister was completely isolated was a mystery to her.
But she had the feeling that her father was merely trying to get someone to watch over her with one hand….and inform of what she did with the other.
Hiding the matter with such poorly made excuses. The bitterness crept into her mouth like acid…
Yeah, that was right…..she was surrounded by liars, who had no respect or consideration to actually put the fort to lie to her and hoped she would just swallow their lies like the naive foolish girl they believed her to be.
For them she was merely the other "girl" of the court. By the goddess...how infuriating were they all!
She took a step forward, her face creased with annoyance and cold fury that marred what she was trying to be a look of indifference. Pointing one accusatory finger at the man, jabbing the thing into his chest.
``And yet you stayed to peek on our conversation.., don't dare deny it, I know you did´´
Instead of faltering or making excuses he smiled once again.
Wrapping his lips with that filthy, faked thing that he wore for a smile...his eyes glinting with a dangerous light.
Then his expression changed back to a more solemn and pitiful sight, almost as if he was trying to appear fearful while he brought a hand to his chest. That did not hide the shrewdness hiding within..
``My princess, you paint me in such a bad light that it almost feel like you have something against humble old me..´´
He muttered softly.., an apologetic tone cast down through his words as he slowly bowed before her, a velvet glove swiftly pushing aside the locks of hair from covering his eyes once the angle of his head threatened to cover them with his golden mane.
She was sure that many stupid girls would have been fallen for his looks, or the smooth sound of his words.. She however could only feel contempt at the whole scene, one of her eyes starting to twitch.
[Humble? Humble my ass you big headed cretin ..!]
``To dare to imply that a member of the royal house has something against someone of a lower status with nothing to back it up is a dangerous claim..´´
His face creased for less than a second, before he nodded in a more affably manner as he started to rose from his kneeling position.
Without her permission may she add...
``Still, even if I would relish in comforting your highness by admitting whatever flaw or fault you believe I have committed..I must regret inform you much to my dismay that I did no such thing,.´´
Her eyes hardened, crimson orbs glaring back into his with nothing but veiled contempt. There was no way in hell anyone would believe that. Well, at least not her...
Finding himself not graced with a vocal answer, he found her silence as his permission to continue.
``I merely took my position to guard you and then the door once you traversed inside the confines of princess Iris room so that no servant would come to disturb your precious moment between princess Iris and you... ´´
He said, before he halted for a moment. His lips slowly wrapping in a not very tender and trusting expression.
``After all, family is the only thing that matters, right?´´
Family….?
All that matters...?
She bit her tongue to stop herself from saying anything overly too harshly and crude on the spot..
To disguise his sarcasm with fake, good wishes..., the callousness of his intentions. Alexia took a step back. How could someone utter such words with such a pleasant voice yet have each and every sentence filled with shit..?
She almost felt sick..
She turned around, not willing to let him the chance to see the ghost of a grimace that was about to pop up. That she knew that if he was looking back at his filthy smug looking face she would not be able to stop from happening.
Curse him. She would have his head for this…
She would make him pay for slighting her and her sister like that. She didn't know when, where or how...she only knew that she would. There was time, she had time...
For now she was left to kill him inside her mind. That seemed to at least put some ease to her troubles.
Taking a deep breath she crossed her arms over her chest her lips purred into a playful, yet annoyed smirk before she sent a side-glance towards Zenon.
``How nice of you.., if only more of my servants were as clever as you are I would be able to rest easy..´´
``Your words are a gift to my ears...´´
[They weren't]
``Still, I wish to apologize…´´
``For what for….?´´ [Your existence….?]
``For hearing bits of the argument. Sadly, when it started it was rather hard not to hear the booming sound of your voices.., my apologies my princess...but though wood and stone my block ones own eyes, I can not in good faith stab forks in my ears.´´
[And what a pity it would be…]
After a few seconds, she sighed. Dealing with idiots was tiresome. Dealing with foxes full of shit was even more so.
``We do what we must I guess...´´
Though the thought of having a few forks stabbed into the man's ears would have been a nice gift indeed.
``Indeed.., I am glad that you can understand my plight, princess Alexia.´´
She granted him a playful smirk while she placed a finger over her lips, stroking them carefully as red wine eyes glinting with practised amusement.
``And yet, I am left with my questions unanswered and my authority ignored.., that doesn't seem very noble of you. Don't you think the same.?´´
``Alex-´´
``Is princess Alexia to you, Zenon…, remember it´´
She cut him off without missing a beat, her words changing tune as quick as one could draw another breath, catching the man by surprise the way she could speak calm and collected and turn into a seething spiteful machine.
The way his eyes flinched and his marred in confusion by the sudden interruption was golden. It did not last long though….
``My apologies, Princess Alexia..., but I do not seem to understand what is the problem..´´
``Now feigning ignorance? Ah...what I am going to do with you..´´
``If its because of your fathers orders I can not do anything about it, he worries for your health…´´
[An awful timing to do that, don't you think?]
``Pardon my scepticism to the notion that you alone would be that significant in the preservation of my heath...´´
``I may be one, but I was chosen for a reason...´´
[And pray tell what that reason is? Not the worthless trash you have given me, that I am sure of...]
`` I am sure you were, after all...guarding a princess is no laughing matter. And yet there is something that leaves me confused..´´
``And what would that be?´´
`` Am I not in the strongest bastion of the entire kingdom? Surrounded by dozens of heavy, thick walls and guarded by hundreds if not thousands of guards and black-knights..?
``Yes...´´
``Then surely one more would not change much..don't you think?´´
``That did not stop the capital from being literally ransacked, it did not stop you from being hurt.., did it..?´´
Her face became creased with lines. The sting of the slap seemed to grow stronger just as those words were mentioned.
That was a low blow if there was one…, and he was enjoying every single second of it. Her eyes remained a few too many seconds resting over the pommel of his sword as a result.
Thinking on the myriads of ways she could plunge the thing into his wretched heart.
``Is there a point to this? Or are you here merely to waste my time..?´´
``She looks horrible, doesn't she..?´´
….
….
That was not what she was expecting he would say next, and though she knew he was not speaking about her...that did not mean that she didn't know which person he was speaking about right now.
This time whatever facade she had tried to held onto shattered as true, raw loathing started to ooze from her.
No one…
No one but her had the right to speak of Iris like that.
Not father, not the nobles and servants, and surely not this small piece of scheming SHIT!
Her jaw clenched, her heart started to throb louder and louder inside her chest. Slowly, she tilted her head to the side, the muscles of her neck refusing to bulge...but in time..they gave up and surrendered to her wishes.
Until she was face to face with that vexing cockroach..
``What did you just said..?´´
``Princess-...´´
``What. Did. You. Just. Said…?´´
``I merely stated that your sisters behaviour must have been atrocious to push you like this..´´
``First denying and ignoring my orders and wishes that should have come first and foremost in your duties...and now you are throwing shame on my dearest sister, who mind you is the heir of our kingdom..?´´
``I-….´´
``Do you even know what you are doing..?´´
Her only answer was a cold glare, and yet She could not help but chuckle.
It was a dark, bitter thing…but for a moment it felt a rather nice thing to feel. A wicked grin warping around her lips.
``My oh my…., to act so unruly and unsightly before a princess. You must be either bold...or down right stupid´´
``That isn't nice to say to your bodyguard..´´
A far more mild and temper way to say "that is bold of you to assume at my swords arm range" Sadly giving her station and the fact that she knew he would not do anything his empty words ended falling in deaf ears. She was not amused by it however.
``You are digging your own grave….Zenon, how deep it will be is now the question at hand..´´
If father allowed she would more than likely dig it and bury him with a shovel. In fact, why wait for fathers approval when she could do that before asking..? It wasn't like he would care much anyway…
With him burying his head in the ground all the time…
However if the blond Knight turned bodyguard was worried about that.. he did not give any sign of it. Instead he started to applaud.
Applaud of all things..!
``I apologize from the depths of my heart. I meant no disrespect, my princess-..´´
``Sure you didn't., isn't that what each and every foul and black hearted servant accused of treason says before judgment..?´´
Zenon rose his hands in a placating manner, but this time the gesture was more fragile, rigid, tired...as if posing his perfect persona was a heavy burden when he was dealing with her.
Oh, how much she would have wanted to use that opportunity to kick him in the balls.
``My words may have sound crass…´´
``Which they were..´´
``And rude..´´
``Aha...´´
``But right now, you can not deny that Princess Iris is not...pardon my wording, in the right state of mind...´´
[Well, it didn't take a genius to get that notion…, not like she was doing matters any better with her aptitude.]
Alexia thought with disdain.
Still, what was he alluding at..? She had the feeling that she was not gonna like it.
``That is for me to worry about, and no one else...´´
``Sadly, it is my right and duty to worry..princess Alexia. She is, after all...the heir to the throne. It is in everyone's best interest to look after her..´´
``Though if you ask me, that may be a mistake.´´
``That sounds treasonous, I did not know you had it in you..Zenon´´
``You misunderstand, my princess...what I meant was that we should put everything in one basket...as the common citizen says´´
``Nonsense..´´
``Believe, I would not waste my breath and time with such things if I do not find an ounce of truth to them..´´
Her eyes closed to a half lid, they had softened a little bit, though only out of annoyance than anything.
``And what would that be?´´
``Why would we risk so much in betting the hopes of the kingdom….in just one person when we have another already..? Surely you are not expecting that if your sister fails to get a grip of things your dearest father may just make another heir...when you are already on and about..´´
Her lips stiffened, her breath hitched.
``Are you really appealing to my pride..?´´
If that was his end plan, it was rather stupid. Zenon shook his head as if she had uttered a foolish question.
``I would not do such a crude thing, though I am indeed appealing to your sense of logic..unless you are stating that you have no such thing´´
She almost felt herself tsk with her lips. This man really liked to hear the sound of his own voice.
``You are using an awful amount of words to disguise the fact that the answer was yes...´´
``Correct me if I am wrong, my princess…, but doesn't this kingdom deserve the best? Doesn't our citizens who put their trust on us need a strong leader to lead them to safety? Surely you can see this as much as I do..´´
[I have the feeling that what you believe they deserve and what I think does not necessary mean the same..]
Besides, the fact that he was speaking of the little guys as if he cared for them only made the putrid stench of lies he was covering the whole thing all the more palpable...which made the jarring sensation double with that simple and fake smile of his.
She crossed her arms below her breasts, pressing them firmly against her chest.…, biting her lip.
``What does that have to do with anything..?´´
``I am afraid that quite a lot my princess…, if not everything we have discussed. ´´
``How so?´´
``The kingdom needs a steady hand to lift it up from its stupor from these recent tragedies. People are afraid, they are looking for those to blame for their misfortune...and they will.´´
``They always do that..´´
``Ain't that the truth..? And yet, someone must lead us through this anyway…´´
``You seem to have someone already in mind…, I didn't though that you were allowed to play matchmaker on which Lord you would prostrate your loyalty so easily. Almost as if we were speaking about treason...´´
He smiled at her, a gesture that did not reach his eyes, if not anything at all.
``I only look for the future of my kingdom…, if anything I am a patriot..´´
The two of them knew that was NOT the case...
And yet she could do nothing about it, knowing did not mean she had anything to prove it but her own words to back it up. And if something she had learned, words alone were worth shit...
``Fair enough, rant about it if you must...not like I may care..´´
He bowed his head slightly. ``Your kindness knows no bounds...´´
She scoffed. [You little shit...]
``With your highness approval I will commence then..´´
I believe that we need someone who is well versed in politics but takes a more direct approach than your father, someone new to the field yet knowing of the game that is played, quick to act, yet not blindly so like princess Iris... ´´
``Someone….capable...´´
``And you think I am the one to take the reigns….´´
It wasn't a question, but rather a statement. After all, this was where he had been goading her onto, was he not..? Still, she wanted to her him say it.
She can already see the answer warp around his features as she waited Or in this case, in his eyes...no matter how many times he shook his head.
``Not as you are now…, no´´
``Why is it that I can hear a but in there..?´´
``Because there is one, after all... with the proper help….you could become greater than you are now..´´
She could not help but feel more disappointment sip through the cracks. Her lips pursued downwards into a scowl.
She was miserable…, but she was not stupid to fall for such obvious trick.
``I am too old to fall for honeyed words and childish tales, Zenon, If my father put you up to this..you can tell him is not working´´
Still, there was a big part that this may not have been orchestrated by her father. Her mother? No, that was even less lightly to occur...not improbable however. Still, she had the lingering feeling that it was someone outside of those two.
``Childish tales!? Honeyed words!? Oh, please.., you wound me my princess…´´
[If only…] ``You will survive…´´
She replied coolly much to the reality that the last shreds of patience were shedding out from her..
He shrugged. ``Oh, of that I am sure…, though are you that certain to live without getting back at those that have slighted you? To make them regret their words?´´
Her eyes hardened, distaste draw in her face.
[Does that include you, clown?] She wanted to ask, but refrained herself from doing so...much to her dismay.
Still, this was enough…, she had enough of this shit-show.
``Interesting proposition…, but I think I will pass. Now get lost, I had enough of you..´´
``Are you sure? Is still too soon to state a final resolution to the matter, is it not? Please, do not be hasty and perhaps reconsider it for lat-´´
``Leave. Now...´´
``Of course my princess.., I hope you a good night of res-´´
``I said Leave..!´´
ºº
What had she done...?
What in the seven hells and all that was holy had she damn done...?
Tears slid down her face from the corners of her puffy eyes that even though they had grown tired they continued to shed their never ending supply of tears. Glistening her skin until they reached her chin. Their warmth turned into a heated trail of burning steam, her body frozen in place as if caught under the cold hands of an uncaring god.
"You just lost a fight and got away with your life, is not a big deal. So fucking grow up!"
She clenched her jaw, teeth grinding. Something that she had done time and time again these last few days.., yet somehow they all paled in comparison with the emotion drawn now through them.
As if she had been just pretending and was now shedding the covers of her soul...
``Iris what have you done...´´
Muttered the red haired princess to herself, this time giving a voice to the thoughts that had already been plaguing her. Her voice a ghastly whimper slipping through her lips as she stared with still living horror at her hands as if they could answer her question or the goddess herself would appear through them and cast her light into this darkness...
But silence was their answer…
She bit her lip, a cold shudder running up through her spine.
She was alone, she would always be alone. And the worst part? That it was her own doing that had led her to this…, she and her pride, and her hollow self of accomplishments...
"You just lost a fight and got away with your life, is not a big deal. So fucking grow up!"
She balled her hands into tight fists. Clenching them, not caring the ghostly shade her knuckles turned. Not caring of how her nails scratched and then dug into her flesh.
She had not meant to do that. It was so not like her to lash out in anger, to harm those close to her…
But those words had been too painful to bare, too sharp, too cold. But they were true. each and every last one of them..
"You just lost a fight and got away with your life, is not a big deal. So fucking grow up!"
She slowly rose from the ground she had been kneeling all this time, ignoring the pang of pain of her legs, or the soreness of her knees as she did. Her naked feet feeling the cool touch of the marble floor clawing at her feet, her body stumbling backwards one, two steps...before she was stopped on her tracks.
Her head hung low, allowing her scarlet hair to fall like a cascade of blood over her shoulders, covering her features in their velvet like touch. Droplets of blood sliding down her fingers and falling down into the immaculate floor.
Tarnishing it...with her own pitiful reflection.
Alexia had been right…
But if she was…, did that mean that she was wrong to feel this way..?
She stared back into the bleeding wounds in the palms of her hands..
She had been out of her depth…, unprepared, weak...found wanting in the kingdoms time of need, and as such people... had died because of her.
Honour should had dictated that she should have join them in the afterlife for her blunder…, for they had paid the ultimate price, who was she to insult their memory by enjoying life while they rested cold under the soil that gave them birth?
She was their princess…, the heir to the throne. She had commanded them and they had obeyed without questioning. Only for her orders to be inadequate to the situation at hand.
"You just lost a fight and got away with your life, is not a big deal. So fucking grow up!"
She took a step forward, then another…before long she had reached the other end of the room.
Her hands clutching her sword. Blood slicked fingers grasping onto dear life the masterfully crafted pommel of the blade, smearing over its delicate features and carved symbols its iron stench.
For what was she fighting for…?
Her breath hitched…, her heartbeat slowed down to a crawl as her hands started to trembled uncontrollably. But she refused to let it go…holding onto it even more tightly.
The undead monstrosities...
Fenrir…
The theriantrope…
The grim Reaper…
They were strong.., no, they were above strong. They were terror incarnate. Living nightmares that she would have pegged before the encounter as mere fabrications of a drunk. But they were all too painfully real.
Could she fight monsters like that? Did she even want to knowing what awaited her if she did..? Could she try and gamble the life of her people like that..? Throw the dice and hope for the best after such an appalling beat down..?
No, she could not….
They were monsters, she was just a human-
For what was she fighting for…?
….
….
The sound of steel being drawn of its sheath could be heard through the room, followed by the soft thud of her hands discarding the cover onto the floor.
Her red wine eyes stared down at her own reflection through the cold steel…, accusatory, bitter, pained…, but never dulled into grief. Searching for the answer that eluded her even then.
Why was she fighting for?
Her kingdom...?
Her family….?
Herself..?
She pondered about it for a few seconds, then she brought the blade closer to her neck, feeling the edge grant her soft skin its cool, ravenous brush…
Her hands clenched, anticipation burning them up.
Her eyes closed, ready for what had to be done, even though a spark of fear still remained inside of them.
Her lips grew stiff…, almost dry like stone when took her last breath.
-SLASH….!-
Her hands twisted the pommel, pushing the blade against her and cutting all the way up…
...
...
By the time she open her eyes her heartbeat was beating faster than she could perceive it, and yet she felt calm as she watched at her reflection in the mirror. Noticing the way her long, dishevelled red mane laying now underneath her feet in a clean cut, well swoop. Leaving its scarlet shade only reach her shoulder-blades.
She was satisfied with it. As simple and quaint as that was...she had not much to give for the fallen now. There would be time yet...
She took a deep breath, then brandished her blade to her side, glaring once more at her reflection, this time through the red hue of her own blood as it had slid down the cold steel.
And even as some resilience shone back, she could also smell the fear and uncertainty behind the depths of her own eyes.
She didn't know for what she was fighting for…, that was true.
But she was damn sure that she would find out, one way or another...
ºº
A/N
Here comes another chapter, I hope you like it. Feel free to comment to give some feedback. Any commentary will be appreciated.
º
Iris has evolved into tomboy Iris..? A surprise to be sure, but not an unwelcome one..
º
Kerberosthe:
-Alexia, of all languages she could choose, she decided to speak facts/Iris woke up and choose violence.
-You wont have to wait long for the next batch of souls sent down the drain of the plot.
-Don't worry, I am sure that Thanos snapped his fingers just as you were writing that part.