But what Pansy didn't know was that Hagrid had also bought some chips in that very same mart. His chips were just regualr Doritos. On the bag was a face he vaugely remembered, maybe from some poor quality cam torrent he watched while drinking with Snape one night or other. On his way down he wondered about Severus, and decided the two hadn't spoken in far too long and needed a good catching up. But all that failed to prepare him for the downright shock of his body hitting the sidewalk. With no warning whatesover he slammed into something hard and cold. He felt a stabbing pain flutter through him and then a cold shock of numbness as he realized he was laying, hapless and defneseless as a kittin right there on the side of the road.
He got to his feet and then took a good look around. Pansy stumbled back up to her feet, intending to reprimand the oafish brute but lost all focus on that to retrieve her Doritos, she just couldn't seem to find them ever since she had fallen down just then.
That's when they both saw the pile of Doritos on the sidewalk. Both tof the bags had ripped open and blewn away into the windy night. Lost somewhere out int hat California darkness.
They both scrambled to the pile of orange chips in a hectic run to get them up before they were too dirty to eat. And that's when the realized
they weren't alone.
"There are my Doritos!" Pansy shouted at Hagrid.
He cowered back a bit, lowering his head like a well beaten dog.
Pansy screamed in rage! "It doesn't matter because now your chips and my chips are all mixed up and i dON'T want to even try to save them anymore, I mean why bother if they're just going to be mixed together forever and ever it's so tedious." She slumped down against a buzzing light pole, the pale shadows of hte flourescents made a ghost of her craggy features and she looked almost dead, corpselike and beatuiful. Ethereal. Hermetic. Forever.
"But.." Hagrid whimpered, Pansy glared at him, challenging him to displease her already further distempered spirits.
"Well alls i'm sayin is thems both Doritos, and you c'n ne'r go wron' wi'h Doritos in m' book. And well I guess that they do go good toge'er tho' don't the'" he managed, eyeing the assortment of Doritos strewn about hungrily.
Pansy had to concede that indeed, just liek the mascot charecters of that green chick and the jurassic park guy on the bags promised that they would. A match made in the heavens. "Yes they do go good together dog, you're my dog now nad you'll eat them out of a bowl while i piss on your filthy mocassins."
Pansy Parkinsons rode Hagrid's fat sausaugey finger up and down spitting, hollering and gibbering, flailing about like a rabid oranguatang in the throes of her passions. Hagrid could not achieve an erection with his chastity belt on, or so Pansy thought.
Actually Hagrids penis was so small that the meant-to-be=restrictive chastity belt, the Chastiti6900, fit more like an especially roomy sports protective 'cup' would and did not hinder his ability to achieve full phsyical arousal at will, or so he thought...
Pansy, with her shining raven hair and jet black humours, had stolen Hagrids heart, and in one so driven fully by his illogical, earthen, passions, the theft of the heart precluded total enslavement of all reason and will power. Hagrid really couldn't get erect because Pansy would not allow it. So he hid his hidden passions further and furher into himself. Putting more and more of himself into himself like a self fisting session or something. Then he really did become erect and that's when he knew.
Love always finds a way.