"Aahhh ha hahahaha!" Luna cruely jeered at Draco who was still reeling from his recent dumping. Pansy had just given him the business and huffed off, leaving Draco flustered. And now this. Spiders soon joined in and the pale young wizard found himself amidst a bararge of taunts.
"Draco's in the doghouse!" Spiders began chanting, "Doghouse Malfoy Doghouse Malfoy!" The two girls joined arms and danced about, they were quiet the sight, especially since Spiders is seven feet tall and had to near bend over double to lock arms with Luna. But anyway.
Neville could barely contain himself for impatience, he had died and come back to life near a dozen times now and what for? he wondered glaring at the silly display before him. He had thought his Boogers Anonymous gambit was working well earlier, but that all crumbled to ashes once Draco and Pansy had got set off. The world could be a real bitch sometimes, he mused sourly as he tried to come up with a backup plan, and one that could keep Spiders's attention at that...
"oh my god, Draco is such a loser," Luna was saying, she and Spiders had finally stopped dancing and were lounging around Draco, pretending he wasn't there, sharing a blunt.
Spiders pretended not to know who Luna was talking about, "oh, that Doghouse Malfoy kid? Yeah," she finally responded amid a flurry of indignant huffing and arm waving from Draco, "I'm so glad he's not here right now, he's so pale and grody"
"You guys aren't even gonna let me hit that!" Draco whined when he saw the blunt was near gone, the girls persisted in their blissful charade of ignorance. Neville watched, arms folded, in grim silence.
"Did you hear a buzzing?" Luna wanted to know, Spiders made a big show of looking around to see where the noise was coming from even though Draco was now completely in her face, "ewww, are there flies on this plane?"
"Guuyyyys!" Draco wailed, but Spiders began pacing about.
"Nah, if there were flies on this plane I'd know, I mean, c'mon, I'm Spiders," Spiders said, she tried to take one last hit ff the blunt but the paper had all but burnt away and she sizzled her lip a little and had to drop it.
"Oh dang, is that blunt wrap all burnt away?" Luna wanted to know, she had bought them herself, in America. They were very expensive and flavored like 3 kinds of berry.
"Ye" said Spiders, "what I'm trying to figure out," she said as she rummaged around the aisle, "is where all that weed got to though..." She had heard about the pot snatching ghost that was haunting the plane but had never expected it to come for her... she barely surpesed panic as her search grew increasingly more frantic.
Luna chuckled it off at first, assuming that Spiders was nearly messing with her, but she soon came to the same dire realization as Spiders, the weed was gone! "Holy shit Spiders!" She cried out, joining in the inefectual search, "it came just be gone! I mean, fuck, we just smoked it-"
"I Know!" Spiders shot back, "i was smoking it too, i mean, I'm not stupid!"
Neville figured this could take all afternoon and decided to intervene, "c'mon Spiders," he grabbed her shoulder, "we're going to be late!" She had forgotten all about Boogers Anonymous and how badly she was addicted to boogers. He was tense all over, expecting her to brush him off, but to his surprise Spiders finally ceased in her futile search.
"Oh snap," she said, checking her wrist watch, it had a squirtle on it, "yeah, we are going to be late, c'mon Luna!" Neville groaned, the two were besties now, apparantly having bonded over Draco's heartbrreak, which, crotchety as he was feeling, even Neville coulnd't fail to appreciate a little. Luna came skipping over to take her place at Spiders's side.
Oh no! Neville couldn't believe his rotten luck, he needed to get Spiders alone so he can tell her about the Hermione Tat Ko; the Hermione Death Battle, and now Luna wants to tag along! but before he can come up with some new desperate ploy to get Spiders alone... "why is this plane ride taking so long?" Luna wanted to know, she and Spiders were all snuggled up together with Luna standing on Spiders's massive, size 17 feet, like spooning but standing up. Jesus fuck thought Neville, were the planning to walk like that?
"Hmmm," Spiders pondered, she finally acknowledged Draco, who had stuck around despite Spiders and Luna's chickanery because of how confused he was by Luna's behaviour, they had been dating in secret so that Pansy wouldn't find out he was cheating on her, but now that Pansy had stormed off to go discover mars or something he figured their love could bloom in the open... and now this...
"Yeah," Neville grabbed Spiders's shoulder, which jostled Luna a little bit as he had to reach up and over her to reach Spiders's shoulder, which was at forehead level with him, "the Boogers Anonymous meeting is starting, you don't wanna be late right?" But Spiders only looked past him to Draco, "Hey Doghouse," she called out
Draco shuffled his feet, he was still sore about getting snaked out of that last blunt since he had just smoked Luna and Pansy and Spiders out earlier while they were hanging out inside of Spiders's gigantic glue-and-ropes web... "what," he grumbled, not looking up at her. He figured he knew exactly where this was going and he wanted no part of it
"Isn't your dad flying the plane," Spiders accused.
"Oh, hey," exclaimed Luna, "yeah, let's go see Luscious Lucius Malfoy! He's a total bro." She added while looking with disdain upon Draco as if to imply that not all the Malfoys were bro material, "He's got a spliff on him at least!"
"God damnit," said Neville. He followed as they made their way up to the cockpit, which wasn't far at all luckily for them. It still took a long time because Luna and Spiders were trying to walk around as one, still in their vertical spooning position, Neville didn't even bother asking, he hoped they'd eventually just fall over and forget about it... The whole way up to the cockpit Draco was pensive, he had tried at first to dissuade the girls but they bowled right past him and were now knocking right on the door to the cockpit!
"Yo Lucius!" Luna called out, but there was no response, they all felt a tide of fear wash over them then, aside for Neville of course, what if the pot stealing ghost had graduated to stealing pilots now?! Luna reached out with trembling hand to push the door ajar... and inside, nothing! The pilots chair was completely empty, before them, the limitless expanse of sky, carrying them ever onward.. But to what fell end?