Now that Spiders' surging mass has dwindled to a trickling stream of slowly returning consciousnesses they, her ex Theremin Slaves of course, are a little frustrated by the fact theyv got some serious lost time they cant account for and also they can't go to heaven or hell now because their souls were completely disintegrated by the fires of rancor 6 the hell planet when Spiders' unleashed the deadly Theremin's Curse!

Thankfully that mess has all been resolved though, she sure is tired from her ordeal. Spiders literally melts into her seat with a contented sigh. that's better, she thought lazily, but then she remembered that the plane is still on fire after her and Harmonica's deathly struggle against Zach Braf...

luckily its confined to just one piece of fire... for now... like the old folks say 'see a fire at your door get ready for a lot more' which means all creatures on this earth, even fires, desire love and the continuance of their line through offspring so it was clear that pretty soon this single fire would reproduce into a whole family of fires and then they'd really be in trouble!

Speaking of trouble, they also have ran out of food and cigarettes, a few holdouts still hold desperately onto their rapidly dwindling stashes but publicially at least the shortage had begun in earnest. The social order began to decay, stewardesses were no longer safe travelling the aisles alone and had to band together for safety, also by now most of the Plane Elfs had been eaten as well...

"I'm just glad the pilot isn't around to see this," Lucretia the stewardess said to her co-workers as they trudged through a corpse strewn aisle.

"I swear," Blondelle agreed, "kids these days are fucking rediculous, give them one cursed Theremin and a couple months without anything to eat and they go bananas!"

None of the stewardesses were pleased with the current state of the Return to Hogwarts Express! Luckily for them the pilot disappeared years ago and there wasn't any bags of peanuts or warm towelles left for them to distribute so they pretty much had nothing to do with anything anymore.

Lucretia and Blondelle were so busy worrying about how much mess the passengers had created that they didn't even notice the fire until they had walked right into it.

"Oh no fire!" She screamed before ashes filled her lungs and she exploded into flames spreading the fire even further down the aisle!

\

It looks like it's up to the Mystery Kids to solve the Mystery of how the plane isn't going to get burnt up!

Padma, Draco, Luna and Harry decided it was just about time this whole fire situation got stamped out once and for all!

"But how do we even fight a fire when we're stuck on a plane with it!" Luna nearly wailed.

"We just have to figure out what this fire wants, then when we understand our enemies as Lao Tsu would have us to do only then will we be equipped with the knowledge of victory!" Harry explained.

"Hmmm, well everyone knows that what fire really wants is to be understood!" Luna chimed in, it was obvious to her at least; everyone always goes around screaming about and at fires but did anyone ever bother to listen? So she hoped that that would make a difference...

"I dunno, Luna," Harry replied, "it would seem that these days every fires number one ambition is to burn down a food processing plant-"

"-or a fertilizer plant!" Padma chimed in, "yeah or one of those," Harry agreed sagely, "too bad we don't even have any food left on this plane anymore! Damnit! I knew that would come back to bite us in the ass some day!"

The other Mystery Kids just about had to agree, he had been saying such for a while now...

"I know, let's just ignore it until it goes away!" Luna decided suddenly.

"Whatever," Draco said, he's too relieved by the fact that he finally rememembered he isn't gay so he doesn't have to worry about Monkey Pox, even though everyone should be, but anyway he is so relieved that his callous indifference really hurts Harry's fragile feelings.

"If you aren't even my gay lover anymore then why continue on as a member of the Mystery Kids, Draco,?" Harry asked pointedly.

"It's just that-" Draco stammered, completely taken aback! He had never expected that he owed Harry Potter sexual favors in order to join his mystery solving team...

"Sure, I get it, you're just a coward," Harry literally spat at him! "You're so afraid of contracting HIV/AIDS or the dreaded Monkey's Pox from engaging in man on man sex that you can't even be true to yourself! If you can't be true to yourself then how the hell are you going to put out a fire idiot!"

Draco sure was intimidated by Harry and also remorseful for his fecund actions in dumping Harry a while ago... "I just don't want to get boils and pustules all over my body..." Draco murmered, abashed. This was just great! First Time Skips had made him forget he was straight and then Spiders destroyed his soul forever with her curs'd Theremin and now he's probobly going to starve to death if he didn't burn first! Good Greif! he thought sourly... just what we all need, another air born crisis!

"Whatever," Scoffed Harry, "If Bill Gates wants you to get Monkey Pox you're going to get Monkey Pox so you might as well be gay!" Harry assumed that his logic was ironclad and began aggressively groping Draco's lush buttocks through his tight tailor-fit robes..

"You guys, or should I say you gays... this isn't helping! We have to solve this mystery before we all burn to death!" Luna stamped inpatience!

"Good idea Luna, I'll search the Gematria values for the terms 'fire' and 'fire in the sky' on the Mystery Computer" Padma said and went over to the massive supercomputer that helped them solve mysteries.

But then the fire came in the room. "Oh shit he found us!" Luna roared! What would they do now!?