They rode hard for a time. Elizabeth was determined not to slow Nathan down, and she and Sargent were well up to the task. She knew she'd be sore when this was all over, but if Nathan were honest, he would be too. Riding fast and steady is not something anyone but mail riders did on a daily basis.

Breaks were necessary, and as the sun rose through the trees, they slowed the horses to a walk for a bit, allowing for conversation.

As two well-trained Mountie horses, Sargent and Newton were entirely comfortable walking closely and giving Nathan and Elizabeth the intimacy of quiet talk and the occasional touch. They watched the fingers of light move across the meadows beyond the trees, and after a time, Elizabeth sighed.

"I hope I never take this land for granted." Smiling, she turned to Nathan. "When Jack was a baby and couldn't sleep, we would sit on the porch together all bundled up and watch the sun rise. It always calmed him down."

Nathan nodded. "Allie was the same. She didn't understand death, but she knew her mama was in the sky, so I think it made her feel closer to Colleen."

Elizabeth turned quickly and smiled. "Yes! I would talk to Jack about his father all the time when we did that. He was too young to express himself, but I was sure it gave him comfort."

"I think they understand more than we think they do." He looked out at the rising sun and took a deep breath. "We both missed Colleen so much. She was the light in every room. I can see it so clearly in Allie."

Elizabeth nodded. "That was what your father said. Called her the spitting image of her mother. And the stories he told us about Colleen – just like Allie. Smart, funny, a little mischievous…"

Nathan laughed. "Oh, she was. Always getting in trouble and trying to drag me along with her." Nathan looked off into the distance. "It was Colleen and me against the world. Always."

Elizabeth left him with his thoughts for a moment and then asked softly, "You don't have to answer this if it's too difficult, but you've never said how she died…"

Nathan let out a deep breath. "I don't mind talking about it with you," he said, reaching his hand out to touch hers. "Nothing dramatic. Influenza. One day she was laughing and dancing with Allie, and the next she was in bed with a high fever and coughing so hard we were afraid she would break a rib. The doctor could do nothing for her but try to make her comfortable. She never left that bed."

"Oh, Nathan, I'm so sorry. That must have been terrible for all of you."

Squeezing her hand, Nathan said, "Thank you. It was. And it was just my mother and me, because my father was off…" he waved his other hand in the air, "...doing whatever he was doing – he didn't come home until Colleen had been gone for a few weeks. We'd buried her out under the wide oak tree behind the house, without her father or her husband there." Nathan's jaw tightened. "She deserved better."

"And Allie?" Elizabeth asked. "How was she during that time?"

Nathan smiled sadly. "Allie kept us sane. Four years old, and she would just walk up and take your hand and gaze into your eyes… as if to let us know there was still life around us." He paused for a moment and then continued. "She and I always had a good relationship, though I was away a lot with the Mounties. I couldn't compete with Colleen, but I could still be a pretty fun uncle." He laughed softly.

Elizabeth nodded and laughed too. "Oh, I'm sure you were."

"It was my job to keep Allie away from Colleen when she was sick. We were so worried about her catching it too." Nathan turned and smiled. "That's when I taught her to fish, out on the small pond behind the barn. "We both managed to forget a little out there. I'm sure she still remembers how she felt then, and what a respite it was."

Elizabeth smiled softly. "I'm sure you both do."

Nathan laughed softly and looked down at the reins in his hand. "I haven't told anyone all of that before. It seems like forever ago, and then it feels like just yesterday…"

"Nathan, Colleen was so lucky to have a brother like you. I do believe they can see us, and they watch over us. You're doing such a good job with Allie."

Nodding, Nathan said, "And you, with Jack."

Elizabeth tilted her head and looked out toward the glow of the sun, dappling the trees. "I've often wondered what it would be like to be raising Jack with his father." She sighed and looked down. "Probably not much different, considering how much he was always away." Her eyes hardened and filled. "Taking dangerous missions that he wouldn't tell me about."

Smiling, Nathan said, "Don't be too hard on him. The Mounties are very good at selling those 'hero missions.' They tried it with me before I came to Hope Valley. I used Allie as an excuse, but they didn't like it. They really don't want us to have families, truth be told. Too distracting. They like to say, 'If we wanted Mounties to have wives…'"

"We would have issued you one," Elizabeth said, nodding.

Nathan turned sharply and chuckled. "Jack told you about that?"

Smiling, Elizabeth nodded again.

His eyes softening, Nathan said, "We don't always follow orders. It's gotten me into trouble more than once. But I value instincts more than regulations at times like these. Obviously, Jack did too."

For a moment, Elizabeth just gazed at Nathan, remembering their talk about instincts. Then she took a deep breath and asked a question she'd wanted to ask for a while.

"After the windstorm, during our… disagreement…"

Nathan laughed softly, "Oh, that was a fight. I can't remember being so angry with a woman since Colleen and I were kids."

Elizabeth frowned. "Why were you so angry? I think I know the answer, but I want to hear you say it."

Nathan sighed and looked out at the trees. "I never told you that when Lucas brought you back from Union City, Allie and I were just coming out of the woods from fishing. I saw him take your suitcase out of his car and… I can't describe how I felt. It was like a steel band was wrapped around my chest, tightening…"

"Oh, Nathan, I had no idea…"

Shaking his head to rid himself of the memory, Nathan turned to her. "I know. You didn't see us. The last time I'd seen you was right after I gave you the apple, and I felt so good about where we were headed. It was just like a door slammed shut. I was already in love with you, and I couldn't see how we could come back from that. I made myself a promise that I would be your friend and the town's Mountie, and nothing more."

Elizabeth smiled. "And then I went and almost got myself killed…"

Sighing, Nathan took her hand again. "I think that's when I truly realized that whether you loved me or not, I wanted to have you in my life. I tried to run from that with the promotion, and in my mind I used Allie as my reason, but I don't think I could ever have left you." Remembering, he said, "That whole year of you and Lucas, your engagement…" He shook his head. "I couldn't give up on you, on us, but at the same time, I had to be ready to watch you get married, have children, live out your lives together, while I just continued to love you."

"Oh, Nathan…" Elizabeth said, bringing his hand to her lips. "I'm so sorry. And I can only say that I was in pain too. Every time you rode by, every time we talked…I had to build a stone wall around myself. I knew I was cold, and cruel, and underneath it all, I couldn't stop feeling that my life would never be complete and honest and perfect without letting myself love you."

Nathan squeezed her hand. "Do you think Lucas knew?"

Elizabeth sighed. "On some level, yes. In all that time, I never gave myself to him the way I have with you in just the last few months. I never said the things I've said to you. I think he felt that if he kept giving me things, sooner or later I would need him more than I needed you."

Nathan nodded. "But things aren't the key to your heart. If they were, you would have stayed in Hamilton."

Turning, Elizabeth said, "You understand that. He never did. And no matter how many times he told me that he didn't want more than a simple life, I knew he saw himself doing great things on a bigger stage. Everyone did. And a part of him assumed that I would… adjust. Change. Go back to who I was before I came to Hope Valley."

Nathan smiled at her with soft eyes. "None of us will ever be who we were before Hope Valley." He pulled gently on Newton's reins and wrapped them loosely around the horn, allowing him to graze on the tender grasses under his feet. Elizabeth did the same with Sargent, and leaned toward Nathan.

Their lips touched, and as it always seemed these days, it felt like ages since they'd kissed. It was always the most delicious surprise to Elizabeth, feeling the softness of his mouth and the heat within it. Nathan reached his hand around the back of her neck and toyed with the ends of her hair while she placed both hands tenderly on the sides of his face, and they searched deeper. Elizabeth heard her own sighs echoing lightly through the trees, and she thought being here, doing this, feeling the strength of the horses beneath them and the whisper of the wind through the leaves, was one of the most beautiful, serene and passionate moments of her life.

Pulling back slightly, Elizabeth spoke against his lips. "We're not getting very far…"

Nathan smiled and nuzzled her hair, "Breaks are important…"

Elizabeth laughed softly. "I brought lunch, and you have a blanket."

Laughing too, Nathan said, "It's eight o'clock in the morning."

Feeling the heat rise, Elizabeth said, "I'm hungry, aren't you?"

Leaning in to kiss her again, Nathan said, "Starving…"

Needing to feel her in his arms, Nathan dismounted gracefully from Newton and took Elizabeth by the waist, sliding her down his body until she was in his arms. The horses kindly moved slightly apart to allow them space and continued to graze silently.

As they drew closer, Elizabeth was aware of how completely alone they were. No matter where they were in Hope Valley, either Jack or Allie were asleep upstairs, or Rosemary was just a knock on the door away, or Bill could come bursting into the Mountie Office without a word. Now they stood in the middle of a copse of trees with nothing but birdsong and the scuttle of squirrels and chipmunks, the hollow sound of the woodpecker on the tree above them, and the sound of their breath coming faster.

No one would stop us, Nathan thought. As he felt Elizabeth press closer, and he moved his hands along her back, he felt her yield to him completely, and he felt himself falling, falling…

Taking a deep breath, he moved his mouth from her lips to her hair and her head went to his chest. She could feel his heart beating fast in her ear, the wool of his vest warm on her cheek, and the smell she loved so much, of leather and soap and the outdoors… of Nathan.

They stood in silence for a time, allowing the heat to abate, finding their senses. Nathan chuckled softly. "We're going to have to do something about this," he whispered.

Elizabeth smiled against his chest. "What do you suggest?"

He breathed deeply. "I have an idea, but this is not the time or the place." He pulled away and looked tenderly into her eyes. "A top secret mission is not the place to be making lifelong plans."

Smiling up at him with love in her eyes, Elizabeth said, "No, I suppose not." She leaned up and kissed him slowly, gently. "But when the mission is over, perhaps you'll tell me what you have in mind?"

"You can count on it."

After running the horses, and themselves, hard for a time, they stopped to eat the lunch Elizabeth had packed and to close their eyes for a bit on the blanket that Newton always carried. The same blanket that Nathan had wrapped around Elizabeth's shoulders as she waited to hear about Ned Yost outside the Infirmary.

With her head on a pillow she'd fashioned from her bunched-up coat, Elizabeth gazed at Nathan as he finished a second chicken sandwich. She ran her hand over the soft warmth of the blanket and smiled.

"Do you remember when you put this blanket around me? I was so cruel to you that night. I'm sorry about that." She sighed and laughed a little. "I seem to be apologizing a lot these days."

Nathan smiled. "You weren't cruel. You were scared. I knew that."

"I was never scared of you. Only about how I felt about you. Every time you sat near me I couldn't stop myself from thinking about what it would feel like to snuggle into your arms…to kiss you…"

Nathan set aside his plate and stretched out next to her. "Like this?" he said softly, as he pulled her head gently onto his chest and reached his arm around her.

Elizabeth closed her eyes and released a deep breath, murmuring, "Yes, exactly like this." She circled his chest with her arm. "I knew how good it would feel."

Nathan began by kissing her forehead, tenderly moving his lips back and forth on her soft skin. Then a kiss on the nose, then a cheek, and inevitably, his lips found hers. So many years of wanting made it nearly impossible for them to be close without the fire beginning deep down inside them, and before long, they were in a position that was very inappropriate for an unmarried couple. And the problem was, neither of them wanted to stop.

Nathan pulled away and breathed deeply. "I knew this trip was going to be challenging, but I thought it would involve riding… or stealing…" he laughed softly, still holding Elizabeth close to him. With a deep sigh, he sat up and put out his hand. "We have a lot of miles still to cover."