Chapter 1: This is so troublesome
Shikamaru: I really just want to be a normal ninja making an average living... What did I do to deserve all of this?
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Shikamaru is not having a good day.
One moment he's delaying his promotion to become jounin, the next moment he is leading a battalion of long-range combat shinobis in a worldwide war because Gaara has bigger problems, like fighting an Uchiha refusing to die, than to lead people who have no clue how to fight legends and gods.
Then his old man went and died.
He became the impromptu Chief Strategist of the Allied Shinobi Forces. His father didn't have time to seek consent from him.
Every freaking time, they just promoted him out of nowhere.
He doesn't want this.
He blames the Chuunin Exam. He should have fucked off and left during the first part of the exam.
Whatever happened to asking his opinion about his career?
Seriously, he just turned seventeen last month.
This is such a drag.
"Commander, what will we do next?!", asked Kitsuchi, an Iwa-nin he contacted through Ino's Mind Body Transmission to teach everyone simple earth wall - a jutsu that should have been taught on ninja academies, to deflect the ten-tailed beast ball. The shinobi was panicking at the other side of their connection. Explosions and cries were heard. "We can't just defend forever!"
"I know.", Shikamaru said calmly while internally wanting to shout his desperation to the said shinobi.
...Commander? Commander?!
What the fuck?!
Okay. Fine. Whatever.
There are more pressing issues to deal with than to whine about life.
Because how can they defeat Uchiha Madara, a ten-tailed beast and another crazy (and powerful) Uchiha that secretly puppeteered the Akatsuki?
Madara defeated the current five Kages! Madara even matched with the First Hokage! What can a lazy chuunin like him do to defeat all of that?!
Maybe his idea of him not fit to be a shinobi is true.
He should've not let his father or Temari persuade or comfort him that day.
As far as he is concerned, he is not a powerhouse like his batch mates in the academy.
The ground shook while Shikamaru gulped his doubts.
"We have no more chakra resource to make ambitious jutsus to fight. Naruto needs his full power to concentrate on his battles. Sakura is concentrating her abilities to assist him. If we attack more, we will lose more chances in winning this war."
Shikamaru turned urgently to his female teammate.
"Ino! Connect me to all shinobis! We are to retreat. We needto-"
Meteors started to fall from the sky.
Shit!
The moon turned red reflecting a Sharingan.
Nah, I can't solve that.
A bright light.
Large roots began emerging and wrapping them.
This is beyond my paygrade.
Shikamaru can't even shake his head to express his exasperation. He can't move.
"Old man.", he whispered in his mind defeatedly.
He wants to apologize to his father for not coming up with any strategies to escape this situation.
Well, he tried his best as always.
"It's over. We lost."
.
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When he thought he could finally float his mind through the clouds, the world included him to its crazy schemes.
Shikamaru got a throbbing headache that he is sure will last for a very long time.
As far as he remembered, (1) the moon is red, (2) he was trapped on a tree, and (3) he is dreaming of people who died.
He was abruptly awakened by being thrown around.
The next thing he knew, slitted yellow eyes stared back at him.
Because the world is like that to him, the shock didn't allow him to blink.
"Great, you're finally awake.", Orochimaru brightly hissed.
A child with a familiar silver spiky hair tiredly sighed beside the Snake Sannin. He feels the same.
"Let's now begin to plan how to save the world."
Wait... What?
Shikamaru looked around. They are in a stony room full of tubes and wires.
Where am I?
What happened to the war?
"Feeling confused?", the Snake Sannin asked because he is a bastard. "I'll just give you three minutes to adjust and recollect yourself then we can start."
The child beside the Sannin unapologetically snorted.
"Of course he is confused.", the child lazily drawled. "Even you were confused. If anyone is not confused for this predicament, they are crazier than those damn Uchiha zombies."
"Crazier than me?", the Snake Sannin raised his eyebrow.
The child sighed.
"I never thought the time will come I will conclude someone more unreasonable than you."
The Snake Sannin scoffed, unimpressed.
"More ridiculous than the one who sent us here back in this time?"
"Okay. That's unfair judgement.", the silver-haired child tried to frown, but his childish face can only pout. "I didn't plan to do all this."
The Snake Sannin only stared.
Shikamaru can't hold his questions anymore. The more things he heard, the more baffled he feels.
"What the fuck is going on?!", Shikamaru demanded.
The silver-haired child smiled at him, not grasping the fact that he was panicking. "Look at your body first."
Despite himself, Shikamaru tilted his head.
What?
Why would I look at my body?
Is this a trick question?
"The current Chief Strategist of the Alliance can be clueless at times. I now worry for our future."
The Snake Sannin seated himself to a chair and assessed him. "Too bad we didn't get a chibi Shikaku. But you'll do."
"He is more ruthless than his father.", the silver-haired child supplied. "He's the real deal."
"Oh?"
"Did you know anyone else that can kill an immortal?"
"He never defeated me."
The disrespectful child rolled his eyes. "You are not immortal."
"Excuse me?", the Snake Sannin's tone became higher. "I am."
"I disagree.", the silver-haired child contested. "You just divided your souls like bread and parted them to innocent believers of your blood and flesh. You should've built a cult. Maybe you could match the Jashin-sama freak who granted Hidan immortality."
"I don't believe in god."
"You should be. You've seen one at the war. She successfully put you to sleep the Shinigami didn't manage to do with your arms."
"Do you want to meet the Shinigami now?"
"Sure. Call her! But she'll reject me anyways. I could call myself immortal now, given I live through all this bullshit. I died once, no, twice-"
Shikamaru can only gape at the two people arguing in front of him.
Becausewhat the hell?
Why did this unknown child know he defeated the fucking immortal Akatsuki?
Maybe he is missing something.
That child is very eerily familiar...
Too bad the Snake Sannin didn't forget about his cluelessness.
"Look at your hands.", Orochimaru said impatiently.
Hands?
"What? Does your mind become a child too?"
What the fuck is he saying?
Small hands met his gaze.
He blinks. Once. Twice. Thrice.
Huh... That's weird?
This Infinite Tsukuyomi thing is really playing with his mind.
Okay...?
"At least I'm not the only child here.", the silver-haired child started laughing maniacally. "Maa, Orochimaru, this is a dream come true for you."
Sighing and annoyed at the laughing child, the oldest of the room answered him.
"Well, for your comfort, we are still in the war."
The Snake Sannin burst out laughing.
Shikamaru is getting more concerned.
"But the twist is, we are back to the Third Shinobi War."
He only nodded and sighed defeatedly.
I really just want to be a normal ninja making an average living... that will retire after my children become shinobis and die playing shogi...
I'm only a guy. I am just a simple guy.
What did I do to deserve all of this?
Shikamaru is definitely not having a good day.
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Note:
Shikamaru accidentally time traveled with Orochimaru! And there are others that time traveled too! What could possibly go wrong? And who is this disrespectful child?
This story is also posted in ao3!
Pardon me for having some grammatical errors. English is my third language. Bear with me.