It's never been in my fate to run
I was born to chase the sun
Mama always told me I was like no one
But I'll know when the time comes

I know you all will remember me
In pages of history
Oh no no
Maybe we were born to die young

"Hachiman-san, please move the table toward me." Hoshino unfurled a white tablecloth she'd brought out from one of the rooms. Looking every bit as homely as anyone would in their own house.

Hachiman almost didn't think about it. After all, the apartment was owned by her parents. Foster ones, maybe, but her parents all the same. Except, the compulsory need to be a proper guest instead of a nuisance kicked in when he realized that Hoshino probably didn't live there. Given the reason why they were going to use the coffee table in the living room to eat.

"Is that alright?" He asked Saitou, who was busy texting while the kids moved around the house. Again, like they were used to being there. But there were no toys or picture books, or anything for them really. So it made sense if they, like Hachiman, were guests.

"Eh? Ah, yeah. The twins are too big for their chairs now. We can eat here." Saitou only gave him a quick glance in his direction, then to Hoshino's, barely paying attention to what was going on.

Hoshino looked a bit disappointed that he hadn't listened to her from the get go, but Hachiman's mom didn't raise a guy that'd make trouble while being invited to people's houses… Not that he ever got invited over, until fairly recently, but still!

He put away the decorations onto the other small stands beside the sofa and lifted the small piece of furniture. Moving it away from said sofa to give more room for people to sit on the floor. Which… Okay, yeah. This was a very improvised solution. But, if he had to guess, they didn't want to have the kids use adult seats or mess with the furniture by eating on the couch. The tablecloth was probably to keep the coffee table tidy too, so he didn't say anything about it. And instead, reached out to help Hoshino extend the cloth and put it down on the table in one motion.

"Aww, thanks!"

"It's easier this way."

"Still, thanks. You didn't have to."

Hachiman lifted an eyebrow.

"But it's how it's done?"

"Eh?" Hoshino was about to turn around to do something else, but stopped to look at Hachiman.

"At least that's how we do it with Komachi."

"Ah. Of course, you don't actually live alone." Hoshino snapped her fingers in some sort of 'eureka!' moment. "Makes sense."

Huh… Was it really that big of a deal? Hachiman had never lived alone, not really. So he couldn't tell.

Maybe the way his sister was there for him, and he for her, was what was a big deal instead? What a mysterious thought.

"Anything else needed?" He spoke up before Hoshino vanished into the kitchen, and watched over the kids once he realized that neither Saitou nor their mom were actually paying attention to them. Just in case.

"No, no! We'll just wait for the food." Hoshino came back with two bottles under her armpit. With the glass that he'd left back in the kitchen in one hand. "Can I offer you anything? This is what Ichigo-san and Miyako-san drink, so—"

"Ai, don't hold them like that!" Saitou almost bounced off the sofa and rushed to hold the two bottles by herself, throwing her phone away in the middle of her stupor. Heedless of the flinch that she earned herself from Hoshino. "These things are expensive! And you can get hurt!"

"I think you should at least have said that in the opposite order." Hachiman pointed out.

"But they're not heavy?" Hoshino let her mom fetch the bottles while she placed Hachiman's glass on the coffee table. "And I made sure they were both closed, nothing would've spilled."

"You could've dropped them." Saitou admonished the idol.

"They weren't heavy." Hoshino repeated with a cute faux-frown.

"Still, please don't do that." Saitou shook her head, quickly retreating back into the kitchen.

"Wait! I was offering—"

"It's fine." Hachiman interrupted her, grateful that he didn't have to go through turning Hoshino down. "I don't drink."

Her frown became more real than when she gave it to Saitou.

"I'm pretty sure that's not true."

"I don't usually drink." Hachiman corrected himself, trying to sound as natural as possible. "Much less with lunch. It's more of a sporadic thing."

"Miyako-san sometimes gets wine at random times." Hoshino tilted her head, moving toward the sofa to sit down. Seemingly getting her children's curiosity, as they slowly approached Hoshino's general vicinity.

Huh. Like a hivemind.

"It's not at random." Saitou looked a little mad when she got back. "It's when work is too heavy and I need to smooth the edges a bit, get a bit of respite to keep working."

"Don't quote me on this, but that's probably what any alcoholic says before falling deep into the addiction." Hachiman looked away from Saitou. As in, actively looked in the opposite direction of the woman.

"I don't have time to become an alcoholic, Hikigaya." She took it like a champ and huffed, crossing her legs when she sat beside Hoshino. Leaving the idol sandwiched between herself and Hachiman. "There's always stuff to do, things to deal with. Do you think this whole business sorts itself out?"

"Aren't you, like, super successful and stuff?" Hachiman eyed the woman, seeing Hoshino pay attention to her children on the corner of his vision. But otherwise keeping his own on Saitou.

"Huh, mostly because of B-Komachi." Saitou shook her head. "We'd be way smaller without them doing the heavy lifting."

"Yup!" Hoshino cheered, making a peace sign toward Hachiman before resuming playing with her daughter.

"I see." Hachima nodded. He hadn't really expected that sort of transparency, but given what little he'd seen from Hoshino's performance…

He could easily believe it. She simply shone that brightly.

"Like, sure. The connections and good business practices we've gained through the years are still there, but none of our talents have either the reach or impact that the girls have." Saitou turned her hand around from her wrist, motioning in the air like she was showing an imaginary board while talking. "We won't go broke—"

"Not anymore!" Hoshino interrupted.

"…But we'd still suffer a major blow." Saitou finished with some disappointment in her voice.

It really struck him as odd, how Saitou couldn't even refute Hoshino. Nor did she seem inclined to ask the idol not to remind her. But, well. Family. Of course Hoshino would get away with being a brat from time to time.

"Eh… Sounds complicated." Hachiman said without really thinking about it. He didn't have the knowledge or the inclination to ask Saitou to elaborate. He was just a guy that was in the right place at the right time. Even if she explained, most things would probably fly over his head anyway.

"What about you, depresso spresso-san?" Saitou stretched her back a bit, popping her back while trying to silence a little groan. "Hah… What's up with you? Ready to enter the world of dealing with man-children and cosmetics?"

"Yeah, no thanks. I'm just a college student." Hachiman waved her off. "If push comes to shove, I'll just leave it to you."

"Really? What happened to 'I'll support my little sister'? You looked fairly convinced." Saitou gave him an amused look.

Hachiman couldn't help looking again.

"W-Well… If Komachi insists, and I mean only if she really insists…" He didn't see it happening. Not with the way she'd been hesitant to praise Hoshino too much even after the photoshoot. And Hachiman knew better than most how a single good experience wasn't enough to change someone's mind most of the time; so, he'd felt it was okay to start thinking like it wasn't going to happen. "I'll do my best, of course."

"A dutiful older brother." Saito nodded to herself.

"It comes with the territory." Hachiman sighed. "I'm older, I have more experience. I should be the one helping her along."

"Eh… How cute." Saitou looked at her phone, speaking absentmindedly before standing up. "Alright, seems like it's here."

"Eh? What about your husband?" Hachiman furrowed his brows as the woman left the living room.

"No time to come just to eat food we ordered!" Saitou yelled from the hall leading to the door, making Hachiman turn to Hoshino for confirmation.

"He doesn't look like it, but he's very competent." She nodded to herself, like she had answered his question.

"Does this happen often?"

"When it happens, we usually eat something at the office. All of us, I mean." Hoshino shrugged.

"I see…" Eh… How surprisingly wholesome. Definitely something Hachiman didn't expect getting fuzzy feelings from.

"Sometimes without us." Ruby added, lifting her eyes from the phone she had at hand for a moment.

That… Was that alright to be used by a kid?

"Well, I mean. They're all busy working hard." Hachiman didn't really need to defend Hoshino, not from her own daughter. But he still felt like he should say something.

"I know."

"Of course!" Hoshino ran a finger through her daughter's hair. "I mean, being an idol pays way less than you'd expect. Sometimes, even I'm surprised."

"I did read an article about something like that." Hachiman looked away. "Must be hard, especially since it consumes a lot of time."

"Well, yes. I'm pretty sure none of your friends could pull it off." Hoshino nodded to herself. "Or if they could, they'd have to drop out of college. It's very much a lifetime commitment thing."

"And you've been at it since puberty." Hachiman sighed. "How did you manage with high school?"

Hoshino tilted her head, her smile becoming confused while Saitou returned with her hands full.

"What do you mean high school?"

"That's…"

"Okay, everyone. Sit down." Saitou interrupted Hachiman's idea. Setting the bags on the table before sitting down herself. "Who's hungry?"

"Me!" Ruby put down the phone and quickly sat between Saitou and Hoshino. While the little boy sat to Hoshino's left.

Hachiman chose to sit on the opposite side of the idol, just so he didn't have to face any of the kids completely.

Hoshino's comment remained in his mind while Saitou got everything out of the bag, willfully ignorant of the things occupying Hachiman's thoughts.

That is, until the crunchy pieces of fried chicken that Saitou ordered entered his taste buds.

"…!" He'd forgotten in the middle of the unrelenting waves that he called his thoughts; but food really did wonders for people's mood. Sulking was always difficult with something tasty in your mouth, just like something bland or ill-flavored would ruin the mood.

Disappointingly, his life had had a lot of sulking. Of mulling over things that didn't happen, that happened in ways he'd have liked to avoid, or simply where he sat idly and let them unfold in front of his eyes. Hachiman had needed a lot of good food in his life, and people to share that time with. Hiratsuka, for all her violent outbursts, had been a splendid eating partner since the beginning. And even his other friends had, at some point, taken Hachiman to check a burger out, or try ice cream, or stuff his face with some foreigner food.

And even before, back when things were easier, he had gained good eating partners. It felt as though every time he had something good to taste, there was someone incredible to share with. When Hachiman thought about good food, he couldn't help thinking about someone being there with him. And, conversely, he had barely any memories of eating out before high school.

He unmistakably had to go back to the times that had been easier, where he'd been okay.

"…" He'd not let it show in his face. He couldn't, wouldn't. He just had a conversation with Hoshino about the things in life that were too tough to express. And he didn't need the attention, nor did he feel well showing weakness in front of Saitou.

Come to think of it. Was the sauce that the chicken came with too spicy for Yukino to eat?

"You like spicy food, Hoshino?" Hachiman asked while he dipped his food in the sauce. Keeping his eyes trained on it to avoid dropping the chicken into the thing and have to deal with the mess.

"Eh? I don't know… In moderation?" Hoshino had some trouble handling her chopsticks, or at least it looked like that to Hachiman. Even though her hold didn't tremble or anything. "I was once made to try some really spicy stuff in a program. It was… I think it made my tastebuds weird."

"Right, the one with the comedic videos section." Saitou nodded to herself while eating. "The one with the… The damn zapping thing."

"The taser hidden in the hand?" The little boy perked up a bit. "I thought that was fake?"

"Ichigo made damn sure that it was fake for Ai's appearance." Saitou stabbed the air with her chopsticks and growled a bit. "They let the host pretend to use it, only to fake Ai out. But the guy opted out not to do it at all, the bastard."

What the hell?

"Ichigo-san did explain how that'd work." Hoshino put down her chopsticks and showed everyone her open palm. Only to scratch it with her other hand as she frowned. "Being pocked with something pointy when you do a handshake is kind of annoying."

"That's allowed?"

"When you have the ratings." Saitou shrugged.

"…This is why I don't watch TV." Hachiman sighed.

"Good for you. It'll rot your brain." Saitou nodded. "Instead, watch streamers. We have a few of those too."

"I do it from time to time." Hoshino framed her face with her hands, blinking playfully to invite Hachiman to watch her. If only through her expression alone.

"I thought you didn't know much about these things?" Hachiman more or less remembered having a conversation of that nature with Hoshino, at the very beginning like… Not that long ago, actually.

"Eh, well. Everything's prepared for me." Hoshino shrugged. "I don't know a whole lot about how it all works. I'm pretty sure the girls know how it works better than I."

"Watanabe uploads game footage, Ari does ASMR and sometimes does voice lines with Meimei according to donations…" Saitou shook her head. "Not like you asked."

"No. No, I didn't." Hachiman confirmed. It wasn't like he didn't care about the other members of B-Komachi. Thinking about them as unimportant seemed to be part of the problem plaguing the group, after all. Hachiman simply didn't know them that well, and he didn't want to be told these things.

If he ought to, it'd be nice to talk to them directly. He didn't need to have them on display like things for sale. Not at the moment, at least.

"Well, I didn't know this." Hoshino interjected before resuming eating. "Or rather, I didn't remember that. What do the others do?"

"Sing, mostly. Only those two have tried to carve a niche for themselves, seems like they understand the meta a little better than the rest." Hearing Saitou say 'meta' like that made Hachiman feel a little weird inside. Like, not to be judgmental but she didn't look like the kind, or in the age range, to use videogame terms like that.

"You mentioned three people." Hachiman pointed out.

"Meimei sticks with Ari a lot." Saitou explained. "Like, I don't know why Ichigo always separates them in official appearances. But they're often together in reality."

Heh… You'd think a closer bond would be highlighted in such a group. Or perhaps they wanted to keep them homogeneous? As one, instead of a more complex dynamic that 7 people would naturally have?

Sounded easier to market, at least.

…

What kind of thought was that?

"What about Nino?"

"What about her?" Saitou asked reflexively, making Hachiman press his lips together.

"Never mind, then." He didn't feel like arguing at the moment, so she could be as defensive as she wanted. It wasn't like it mattered much to him. Even with the thing that Saitou (Ichigo) had mentioned.

"Suit yourself." Saitou might've been disappointed, but Hachiman couldn't really tell. Too many things clouding his mind at the moment to make educated guesses. But at least, she looked fine enough to turn to the children. "So, how was the movie?"

"It was okay." The boy replied before his sister sent Hachiman a weird look.

"I'm not sure, couldn't concentrate."

He wouldn't let a kid try to look down on him, however. So he just shook his head.

"It's because it wasn't good." He shrugged.

"Maybe it was too deep for you!" Ruby pointed her chopsticks at him with a lot of annoyance.

Hoshino stared at her child.

"Deep? Because it was the ocean?"

"The protagonist builds himself a tatami-sized raft to explore the sea." The little boy said, sighing while putting his own chopsticks away. Like he expected it to be a while. "But the sea creatures that find out think it's a 'new world' so they try to get onto it. Not knowing it's only big enough for the guy and the salt water processing machine."

"Reverse colonialism." Hachiman nodded. "Except it doesn't work, because the guy is the only one capable of traversing both the deep sea and the lands above."

"That's…" The little boy started but thought better about it. "Okay yes. Even with the excuse of only having the snorkel, the machine means that he could've easily brought along equipment to dive and stuff. The means were always there."

"Exactly."

"And because of that, even when the raft is destroyed it's like… But this could've been easily prevented." The little boy nodded.

"And the fish being unable to see properly above land is also a blatant excuse to make them attack the protagonist." Hachiman shook his head. "That's probably not how it works, and certainly bad vision doesn't make you see people with four arms and sharp teeth, and stuff."

"Or maybe it's about a guy leaving home to live adventures at the sea, and how dumb that idea is." Ruby spoke up, looking at her twin with equal annoyance as she'd looked at Hachiman with. "If the movie ended with the guy returning home, isn't the point that nothing beats that? That adventure isn't worth the risk and loneliness of abandoning everything you know?"

Hachiman opened his mouth and, like the fish above the raft, closed it only to repeat the process a couple of times.

The little boy also didn't have an answer ready.

"Yeah, that's what I thought." Ruby continued to eat with a scoff.

Saitou covered her mouth with her fist, chopsticks still in hand, trying not to spit the food she had already chewed while her shoulders shook in silent laughter.

"Hmmm… I guess I'm with Ruby in this one." Hoshino poked her lower lip with her chopsticks while thinking.

"What did you think it was about?" Saitou asked after swallowing.

"About trying new things." Hoshino stated.

"Eh…" Her daughter tilted her head, scratching her cheek.

"New things?" The little boy frowned.

"Well, the sea is scary and huge. The raft is related to inexperience, I think." Hoshino slammed her chopstick into a weird-looking chicken piece. Piercing it at the center instead of grabbing it normally. "Everyone tells him he's awfully unprepared for the trip, but are also surprised that the raft floats. He borrows the salt-filtering machine is an opportunity straight up…"

"But wouldn't that just make it a downer story?" Hachiman interjected. "The moral of the story would be not to try new things."

"Not necessarily." Hoshino shook her head while chewing. "It's not that it was 'impossible'; it's just that people were unwilling to help the guy's dream come true. And, even if he failed, he proved that it could be done. And that in his attempt, he discovered pretty amazing things. Even if they went wrong due to his inexperience."

"Hmmm…"

"Wasn't he studying sea life when the movie ended? Surely, that means that he was thinking of a next time." Hoshino nodded to herself with finality.

"That… Has nothing to do with Ruby's idea." Hachiman replied with a deadpan.

"Eh? Ah, well…" Hoshino laughed it off, placing her hand on top of her daughter's head. "That's what family movies are for, right? They have something for everyone, let them think and make their own thoughts!"

"I guess…" Hachiman frowned, not wanting to insist that the movie had sucked.

Not like he cared about it. The whole time he'd been in there, his mind had been filled with memories and Hoshino's presence. His interpretation of it had been tainted by bittersweet thoughts.

Yukino would've scolded him, only to later shyly propose to go watch it again. He would've put up a token effort to turn her down, but in return she'd give up and get mad at him. Only for Hachiman to give in to her demands.

At that moment, it felt like yesterday. Like it hadn't been that long ago since he'd been in good terms with her, with Yui. Since before his current group was so united. But, come to think of it, was it that long ago?

Hachiman blinked for a moment, trying to get those thoughts out of his head. And when he looked at the room properly… Hoshino was there.

"Eh…?"

"Hmmm?" The idol lifted her gaze and looked at him. "Something wrong?"

Hachiman blinked again, looking at the girl properly. At her children, at her mom.

"No… Nothing." Hachiman took out his phone and looked at the time, at the date.

What had he done the day before? The day before that? The week before even that?

How long had Hachiman allowed time to just… Flow.

"Saitou… Did Yui-san already get her first-month payment?"

"Eh? Of course not. It hasn't been a month yet." The woman looked confused, a little annoyed too. Hachiman would've made a comment about how easily her mood changed when it came to work, but he was too busy taking everything in.

How long had Hachiman been an adult anyway? When was the last time that he allowed himself to remember the Service Club as it had been, not as it had ended up?

Where did his youth go? When did he start accepting drinks? Spending most of his time doing nothing instead of studying, or going outside to just walk and try to put away the memories that harassed him?

"Are you really okay?" The little boy asked, looking a little concerned.

"…Yeah." Hachiman let out a deep sigh. "I just…"

Hachiman lifted his gaze again, seeing Hoshino silently wonder why she was being looked at.

"Yes?"

"Nothing." Hachiman sighed, and the next inhalation filled his lungs with the freshest air he'd taken in for a long time. He felt… Alive. "I just remembered where I hid something I thought I lost."

"Ah… Great!" Hoshino didn't get it. Of course she didn't. She had things she didn't share with him, just like Hachiman had things he hadn't shared with her either.

The evening was pleasant after that. Even when Saitou insisted to be the one to see him off of the building. Even with the birds waiting for him outside.

He felt a little better in their company too. At least for now.