Authors note: Hey gays, this Is my first fic in english and its great, I translated this with my very low level in english and a little help of Google Traslate, so enjoy.

Mr. McMahon had invited all the wrestlers he had under contract to his office, like good professionals they ignored that and went to get drunk so only some of them decided to go waste their time with the old man. Those poor unfortunates were Asuka, John Cena and Triple H.

—Why did you call us boss?—HHH asked.

—I need someone to read this thing to me—Vince held up a strange letter that was written with newspaper clippings—It's in Japanese and I only speak normal

—If I read it would I get a raise?—Asuka asked innocently—Taking advantage of the fact that this show is in my home country I was thinking of buying souvenirs

—If you read it I will NOT kick you out of this place

Asuka took the letter a little upset and began to read it, it said:

"Mr. McMahon, you fuck face, goodbye"

—That's all?! —McMahon reacted surprised.

—That's all, it looks like he wrote something down there and scratched it all out so it couldn't be read—Asuka clarified—But he did it so badly that you can clearly see the name "Ren Amamiya" and underneath there's a weird logo of a hat with a mask

—And I'm worrying for nothing—Vince exhaled in relief—Now I have to go out on stage to present what the public paid for

Mr. McMahon left his office towards the ramp that leads to the ring ready to do his usual routine, the lights dimmed and he came out to the disgust of the public and the "¡Booos!" were not long in coming, but they were those "¡Booos!" that were part of the show.

What was not part of the show was that the evil millionaire's Titantron changed to a static image of the same logo that was on the card, the music was replaced by the voice of a girl who said the following.

—Hey Vince, just so you know, the office note was supposed to say criticism of what a horrible person you are and that we're going to steal your heart, but since its writer decided to write it 5 seconds before sending it he couldn't finish it, phantom thieves out

The ring, the speakers, the Titantron and the lights of the place exploded, the venue was completely silent, McMahon returned to his office completely angry yelling at the staff that they will find a way to continue the show, he slammed the door and was left alone with the same 3 wrestlers as before.

—Can someone explain to me what the hell happened?!—McMahon shouted angrily.

—I've heard about this on the networks—John Cena said—They are thieves who get into the hearts of criminals, wake them up so they can be good and confess their crimes, they are kind of great

—Why didn't you say that before when Asuka read the letter with the logo?!

—It was very basic for them, but when the mysterious voice came out I knew it was really them

—I would strangle you if you didn't make me so much money! —said Vince as he leaned back further in his executive chair—But also because I don't have to worry about them making it, my heart is full of deadly and treacherous things that anyone could fall into and perish, let's just call my lawyers for when those bastards get out of there and put them in jail

—Which one of them? —asked Triple H

—Today I feel generous, call a local one

In McMahon's heart, the phantom thieves were in front of the door that awaited the palace, Joker kicked it down to reveal a hallway completely plunged into darkness with many treasures.

—Ryuji...—Ren made a dramatic pause to look cool, everyone was excited to enter, get the treasures that the place possessed and teach that millionaire a lesson—Heist music!

Ryuji took out his phone excitedly, went to Spotify and put on "Bad" by Michael Jackson, the thunderous music began to play through the hallway and the phantom thieves entered.

They took everything that shined like kleptomaniacs in an abandoned jewelry store and killed some weak shadows so fast that they seemed to teleport.

Ren left a small mouse trap in a chest that he had already checked and told Ryuji (not knowing that it had already been opened) to get whatever was inside, it didn't take long for the trap to activate and his fingers to turn red from the pain, to which Ren just laughed.

—Why did you do that to him?—Ann asked Ren as they continued moving.

—Because it's funny, a classic joke—Ren replied with a laugh.

—No, it's not. You know, you've been acting like a complete moron ever since you came back

—That's shit, I'm the same cool guy as always

—The same guy? You've even been acting more irresponsible, like when we left you to write the letter to send to McMahon and you did it 5 seconds before the mailman arrived, you've also been stealing coffee from Mr. Sojiro and medicine from Miss Takemi

—I'm a phantom THIEF, literally what did you expect?—Ren reasoned

—The worst is how you treat poor Mishima, as if he were your servant 24 hours a day

—More like a slave—Futaba butted in through the phantom thieve's headphones—At least you pay the servants

—You're right Futaba—Joker affirmed—Why pay Kawakami for a massage if Mishima does it for free? That boy really loves us and would do anything for us, The only bad thing is that it's not that sexy

—Would everyone fucking shut up and focus on the fact that there is no more way forward?—Skull stopped everyone with that sentence as it was true, in front of them was a very pretty wall, it was really beautiful but no one wanted to say it out loud as it would be strange.

When it seemed that the "Phantom Thieves of Hearts" would have to change their name to the "Phantom Thieves of Nothing" there was an explosion in the beautiful wall, Yusuke fell to his knees and began to curse whatever destroyed it, the others would do the same if they didn't have a minimum of dignity left.

—It was so... beautiful—Yusuke said pathetically.

The normal ones simply entered the new place that had opened up for them with the kaboom! It was a really big circular room and in the middle there was a wrestling ring, there seemed to be a shadow in the middle of it so the phantom thieves quickly entered the ring to finish it off, as they got closer they saw that it wasn't a normal shadow, it was the shadow version of the person they were trying to wake up, Vincent Kennedy McMahon.

—I invite you to get into my ring, I don't bite—Vince invited with a smile.

The boys accepted and jumped into the ring, they surrounded him in case he tried to escape although from his calm expression it seemed like he had something else in mind.

—Give up, old dumb retard!—Ren ordered trying to look cool.

—I kindly invite you to talk and the first thing you do is insult me? —McMahon got a little angry at that insolence, abandoning the smile with which he had welcomed them—Well, let them know that I am not one of those who give up!

—But you are an old dumb retard—Ryuji reaffirmed.

—Stop saying that!—Vince demanded.

—Old dumb retard, old dumb retard, old dumb retard—Makoto repeated.

—We will not stop calling him old man until he gives up, old dumb retard!—Joker added.

—I'm fed up! —McMahon shouted, completely red with rage—Where are those times when people respected their grandparents?!

—I respect the old people—answered Haru—But not the mean old dumb retard like you

—Looks like I'll have to send a friend to teach them a lesson so they start respecting the elderly!—Vince put his fingers on his forehead as if he were Professor X trying to use his telepathic powers.

Hulk Hogan began to materialize with the power of McMahon's heart.

—How did you do that?!—Ann reacted surprised.

—Because I wished with all my heart that Hogan would appear—explained Vince—In the end those cheesy movies did serve a purpose

That broke all the laws of how the game worked but it was not time to ask, its time to fight. McMahon ran out of the ring and created a door in one of the walls through which he escaped.

—Don't you dare go after him before fighting me!—Hulk Hogan said with his characteristic emotion that stopped them from leaving the ring.

The boys started laughing at him, Hulk Hogan looked like a horrible loser old man to them, but they still played along thinking this would be over quickly.

—Okay, we'll fight—Joker replied—But to make it fair, a woman will fight without our help

—Why a woman?—Panther questioned.

—Because they're weaker, duh

Sighs of indignation sounded from the mouths of the Phantom Thieves. Ren is a real idiot who should be taught a lesson, so they forced him to fight Hogan, he accepted without much resistance since he thought it would be the easiest thing in the world, the other thieves got out of the ring as managers and waited for the start of the fight, none of them tried to follow McMahon because they really wanted to see how this would end.

The bell rang, Joker ran at full speed towards Hogan and with one punch he left him on his knees, then he gave him another and another, but he didn't react to that last one, so he tried harder but now in addition to not hurting him he started shaking his head from side to side as if he was denying something.

Ren gave another punch but now Hogan got up, surrounded him and began to point at him brutally, Ren tried to hit him but now he did block that punch, and the other, and the other until he began to back away towards the ropes, Hulk pushed him towards them and began to go very fast at which point Hogan interfered with his run with a boot to his face, he ran towards the ropes, propelled himself with them towards the direction where Amamiya was still lying and applied his Atomic Legdrop leaving the boy K.O.

—How easy was this one—Hulk Hogan said with pride—Who's next?

Nobody wanted to be the next, they looked really confused, as nobody could make up their minds Hogan grabbed Ryuji by force and pulled him up to enter the ring with such violence that his cell phone fell on top of Hogan's boot.

—What do you have here?—Hulk took the cell phone and turned it on, what he found in it was the most terrifying thing for him, Michael Jackson before he was white.

Hogan dropped the cell phone and Ryuji to the ground.

—Bu...but Hulkmania never die, Hulkmania never die. Hulkmania never die!—Hulk Hogan screamed as he turned redder until his body reached its limit and exploded.

Everyone was perplexed by this bizarre situation until Joker woke up out of nowhere, at which point everyone reacted again.

—I dreamed something really weird—Joker mentioned—I dreamed I was in a completely black place while I sat in front of the guy we want to steal his heart from

—What else?—Haru asked, really interested.

—You know, if you want to know about my dreams we should sleep in the same bed—Ren flirted.

None of the girls Ren knows would date him, the last time they did they found out he was dating all the other girls he knew, so they just ignored and hated him again as always, even though the dream was real.

In the real world, the lawyer had finally arrived at McMahon's office, she was a girl with some appeal and Vince saw an interesting opportunity.

—How are you, sweetie?—asked the millionaire—What is your name?

—My name is Sae Nijima—answered the lawyer—Nice to meet you

Suddenly the old dumb retard's heart began to do strange things, he felt like those thieves had overcome the first obstacle to his treasure, although he did not feel worried, he had many more battles to fight.