Chapter 20Robin – A shattered mind
''Teaching the princess is…difficult if I must say so myself grandmaster Robin. She simply can't make sense of the written words, says that the words jump around her head. I have heard of such affliction, and I believe…''
''She is four Professor Oswald; I believe that it is premature to assume too much of the princess mental faculties.''
Robin could see that Oswald took offence of being cut off and counterargued, not that he would blame him for it. The professor was at least thrice his age and was clearly uncustomed of being contradicted by someone younger than himself. Yet it was necessary, while the professor was undoubtedly a man of great experience, the grandmaster found him to be tiresomely old fashioned, not that he would voice that little opinion out loud.
''Her aunt Emmeryn could read and understand the numbers at her age…''
''She is not Emmeryn, but I do believe that she has potential. We just need to find it, and a change of tutors might help us in this endeavour.''
That shook Professor Oswald. It was to be expected, changing the princess's tutor would be a loss of station for the aging teacher.
''If…If you're implying that I'm unfit for…''
''I believe that a change of approach is more fitting.''
Robin tried to offer kindly.
''I don't believe that the princess is as slow as you believe professor. I have spoken to her often, and I find her to be quite gifted. We need to approach her education from a different angle.''
''And what angle would that be?''
''One that involves less books.''
To his credit the old tutor hid his scepticism well. They would argue for some time, before Oswald would concede to the grandmaster's suggestion.
''Very well, it is not my place to argue one sent by the Exalt himself, yet I can't suggest any other tutors that would be able to accommodate your…vision?''
On that part Robin already knew the Exalt's decision.
''Not to worry, I'll be taking full responsibility for the princess from now on…''
Conflicting memories…A lack of foundation….
Did this happen or was it just the creation of an active imagination?
Questions that Robin found himself asking all too often.
While most people can say to vaguely remember something…solid from their past, it was not so for the grandmaster of the Shepards. In fact, his memories (that he was certain of) did not go back much further then around four to five years.
The time Chrom found him unconscious on that field of grass. He recalled nothing before that. And yet he was not some helpless drooling fool but proved himself to be a very educated man. Despite not recalling anything of personal significance, Robin quickly found out that he had on an almost instinctively clear understanding on many subjects, most of all the art of war.
And he knew who Chrom was before the prince even introduced himself.
He had a sense of familiarity with the prince. A feeling that he had known the Exalted family for his entire life, and yet it was clear for the tactician back then that Chrom knew nothing of him.
Frederick was right to be suspicious of him, even if his liege lord was quick to take in this random wanderer into his household. Chrom was a good man even if he could be a bit naïve at times.
And then there were the dreams…or were they memories? No that could not be, as many of them involved events that he was certain had not happened.
There was a dream of him advising Chrom in matters of state and family as he was an old friend, it didn't make sense as they had just known each other for a few days, and Chrom was still unmarried.
A dream of his camaraderie with the Shepards, some of them he had not even meet or seen.
A dream of the wars and battles he would participate in, yet he could only recognise the one against Plegia.
A dream of him having a hand in tutoring a member of the royal family, a girl with blue hair, yet Chrom was the only blue haired member of the Exalted line.
And there was the one of him stabbing the man that he would one day consider to be his best friend. That was a dream that frightened him more than anything else.
Where they vision of a future that have yet come to pass? Or maybe false memories that had been implanted by some malign force?
Who was he?
''Robin?''
He was sitting in an old worn chair besides a bed in a small one-room shack. A woman laid in the bed, she was a sickly and weak little figure, years of hard labour had seen to it, but he could not see her face it blurred as he stared at her, yet he knew that he had known her for all his life. The shack had seen better days and was filled to the brim with all kinds of items strayed around in an apparent random location. There was very little room to manoeuvre, but Robin knew there was an order to it all and all of their items were essential. Having only one room had simply forced them to make use of their limited space the best they could.
''Robin?''
The woman repeated.
''Yes?''
He answered as he stirred the stew he had prepared for her. It was mostly water with a few vegetables and pieces of meat, but she needed all the strength the food could give her.
''You shouldn't waste that on me dear. I won't have long anyways. Save it for yourself…''
Ignoring her, Robin took a spoonful of the thin stew and tried to feed her, but the woman stubbornly turned her head away.
''If you're not going to eat it, I'm going to pour it all on the ground.''
Robin threatened but meant it well. It worked and she sipped slowly the offered food.
After another three spoons she lifted a hand to signal she had enough. Robin relented as she began to cough, she needed time to digest it. He put the stew away but intended to continue later once she got better.
''I'm sorry…I'm so sorry my boy. You deserve so much better than this. But they would kill you if they found you…''
Robin felt as if he knew what the woman was referring to but could not recall the details. He wanted to speak but found that he had no control of himself as the event unfolded before him. Somehow, he just knew that he cared greatly for the older woman.
He assured her that she was not to blame for the predicament, something he felt that he had done often.
''My boy…My beautiful boy…You must leave; You're a grown man now and I have thought you everything I know…''
''I'm not going anywhere, not without you.''
Robin said stubbornly. There was a pause before the woman spoke again, her voice broke as she spoke.
''My body is spent, I can't go on anymore, but YOU must leave. Leave Plegia, go towards Ylisse or maybe even Ferox, never let him find you. You're the key, they want you for your blood. The blood of Grima…That accursed bloodline…''
She began to cough again. Robin for his part found some water to give her, in the hopes that it would alleviate her troubles. He felt a great sense of fear and sorrow at the prospect of leaving this woman, he owed everything to her.
''There…there are some coins hidden below the floorboard under the table. Take them. You would need it for your travels.''
''I'm not leaving you here alone.''
Robin repeated bluntly. The woman seemed distraught at this; her eyes shone with a concern that only a mother could give.
''YOU MUST! Please! I'll not have you sacrificed at some alter like a common pig. I want you to live! You are not a pawn of some scripted fate despite what your father says! You are your own person that deserve to make your own way in this world.''
They would go on like this for some time with Robin standing firm in his refusal to abandon this older woman.
The next day he would take the coins and use it to buy more food and some medicine from the local trader, despite the woman's protest. Whatever his actions did any difference he was not sure, as the woman would sleep quietly in after a mere week, but he liked to think that he at least made her comfortable.
He would then quietly bury her near a tree, before selling whatever he could from the shack. Keeping only some clothes (most notably an old coat that once belonged to the woman), a worn bronze sword, some of the medicine and a book that he was particularly fond of. Before leaving the small fishing village that he had called home for most of his life and headed towards Ylisse.
Despite the fact that the girl had attempted to kill him, the tactician of the Shepards was quick to order Frederick not to harm her further after he had knocked her out.
He knew her, she was the princess from his dreams.
He would see to it that she was given medical care in one of their tents but went along with binding her as a precaution.
It proved wise, as the girl immediately went on a rage as soon as she saw him. Claiming how he was a traitor and murderer.
This troubled the tactician greatly, was his dreams truly a vision of the future?
And then it was the girl.
Even if he had just meet her, it had hurt to see her despise him so. In his dreams she had adored him, and their relationship had been close.
He would do something terrible in the future.
He must have to have her bear such pure hate towards him.
The maids of the castle would often complain that the Grandmaster's quarters were an embarrassment against the cleanliness and order of the castle. Stacks of tomes and random items littered the place in an unorganized mess that no one could navigate around except for the tactician himself.
Yet he did not mind, it reminded him of home and the princess seemed to like it. She loved to explore the various trinkets he had collected throughout the years, and he enjoyed watching her fool around and constantly ask him questions.
He supressed a smile as the princess approached him wearing an old feroxian helmet that made her head comically oversized.
She asked if she could keep it.
The helmet was unwieldy and keep threatening to fall off whenever the princess moved her head. And her parent would likely not approve of him giving her that dusty old bucket of steel.
Naturally he gave it to her, he could never deny her anything.
It happened so fast.
The general from Valm had tried to attack the Exalt while he had his back turned. Luckily Lucina had seen this and tackled the general before he could reach the Exalt, at the cost of her falling down to the seas below.
Robin didn't hesitate.
The thought of future princess drowning filled him with a panicked urgency that he didn't believe he could feel. His efforts were close to drown him as well, but fortunately their people above had reacted swiftly and thrown down a rope so that they may be pulled back onboard.
Lucina was however not grateful for her rescue.
Not from him.
She kicked him and he fell down hard on the floor, he could taste blood as he laid there.
''STAY WAY FROM ME! DON'T YOU…DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH ME!''
And so, he didn't. He would from then on take great effort of staying away from her. It was unbearable for him to see her with those hateful eyes.
Maybe it was a bit naïve of him to think that he could ever earn her forgiveness.
''Are you all right? That's the end of him. Thanks to you we carried the day! We can rest easy now. At long last…''
It should have been a moment of great celebration. A trap of Plegia refuted! Their true enemy and their intent finally revealed and dealt with! It had been a hard-fought battle, but they had prevailed. The people of Ylisse could rest easy knowing their Exalt had prevented another long war by cutting the head of the snake.
Validar, the king of Plegia was dead and with him the last leadership of the Plegian cult.
Robin most of all should have been relieved.
He was finally free.
And yet the shadow that weighed on him seemed to grow heavier.
Robin could barely breathe.
Something was terribly wrong. He should not have come.
Chrom's voice became ever distant as his own vision grew red and bloodshot.
''…What's wrong Robin? Hey, hang on-''
The Exalt never managed to finish his sentence as his chief advisor and best friend stabbed him with a bolt of Thoron magic. The shadow in Robin's mind became all-consuming as the entity that had laid dormant in his body finally revealed itself.
It shackles had finally been broken once its vessel had unintentionally walked into the ritual circle in his efforts to kill its pawn.
Robin could only look in horror as Chrom collapses on the ground, while he lost any control of his own body as he turned against his once allies and friends.
He would spend much time arguing with Tiki on her statement of his purity.
He had sought her alone, as the Shepards prepared to leave her abode and return to the war at hand.
He would tell her about his dreams and his fears.
And she would confirm what he had suspected for a long time.
That he was a true and pure scion of Grima's chosen and his dreams may in fact be visions, yet she assured him that he was a good man.
''You are of his blood, yet your soul is pure. Your actions alone speak well of you, and it is from that my mother have chosen to judge you.''
While it bought him some comfort, Robin was not entirely satisfied. The memories of his murder of Chrom reappeared in his mind.
''But how about my visions? If nothing else, might it not suggest that I'm susceptible of Grima's influence? I can't imagine how I would raise my hand against Chrom otherwise.''
Tiki was quiet for a while as if reassessing her previous declaration.
''I sense nothing. If the fell dragon ever had any sway within you, it is long gone.''
Robin very much doubted that. He needed something more assuring.
''Still, I cannot shake the feeling that something is amiss, my blood is still that of the fell dragon and may still be used for their rituals. Can't you purge it somehow? Make it unusable?''
Tiki shook her head.
''No, that is beyond mine or my mother's power. For only by his own hand may he or his creations be truly undone…''
Robin felt his heart grew heavy at this. There was no escape from his fate.
Lucina was right…
He was cursed, a walking plague.
It was only a matter of time before he would drag all his friends down to their doom.
Yet he resolved to keep this to himself a little longer. They were at war and the Shepards needed their tactician. He would do his duty and then remove himself from the pages of history one way or another…
''Congratulations you two, Parents! Especially you Chrom, who would have thought that a blockhead like you had it in you?''
Robin said teasingly as he entered the royal private chambers in order to congratulate his friends' new roles as parents. Sumia offered him a smile, but remained seated while she cradled her crying newborn as her husband rose up to great his best friend in turn.
''As if you knew anything about the subject yourself, sir I'm too good for marriage.''
The two brothers in arms would spar a few more jabs at each other before greeting each other properly.
''Congratulations Chrom. You must be very proud, but how did it go?''
At this Sumia answered.
''It went well. It's a healthy baby girl. We still haven't figure out a name for her yet, but we are leaning towards either Cynthia or Lucina.''
Sumia said, her gaze only briefly leaving her daughter, whose crying had subsided to a few sounds of disgruntlement.
''Hmm…I would say Lucina would be a fine first choice. A name that is closely related to Exalt Lukina of the third line if I remember correctly. And as for Cynthia…it is a name from one of your novels if I'm not mistaken?''
Queen consort Sumia chuckled at this.
''As always you have a sharp memory Robin, yes both of your guesses are correct.''
Their newborn daughter began to cry again, and Sumia's attention was quickly turned back to the little bundle she held in her arms.
''Do you want to hold her?''
Chrom offered suddenly. Robin was taken a bit back by this. He had never tried to hold a child before much less a newborn.
''There's not much about it, just remember to support her head and you'll be fine. Here take her.''
Sumia offered kindly.
Reluctantly Robin reached out and took the newborn princess into his arms.
She was a small little creature, with strong lungs that made her displeasure known. But as she opened her eyes, she noticed that it was not her mother or father that held her, but a stranger. Yet her crying didn't intensify but stopped entirely as she studied this new face that looked down on her.
As for Robin, he began to feel a strange sense of protectiveness towards the newborn girl. It was an incredible and strange feeling to care for someone he barely just met. Despite her fragile form, he could feel her potential, a bundle of endless possibilities that left the grandmaster speechless.
Speaking of which…
''Say Chrom…There is something strange in her left eye.''
Chrom leaned over his daughter and starred for some time.
''I can't believe it! It's the mark of the Exalt!''
Robin was confused at his friend's excited outburst.
''Isn't it to be expected? It is the mark of your family.''
''Yes, but I have never heard of it appearing at birth. Its appearance is usually more gradual throughout the years if it appears at all. Mine became clear when I was ten.''
''It must be a sign that Naga favours her.''
Sumia added proudly.
''Of that I have no doubt.''
Chrom agreed.
Robin merely nodded approvingly at this and continued to stare at the princess. As he did, he noticed that there was an unpleasant warm feeling on his right hand. The hand that contained his own mark: The mark of Grima…
''Say Robin, don't you think it's time that you start your own little family? Find a nice girl, settle down? I know some ladies that would be more than happy to…''
His friends' voices faded into the background as Robin only paid superficial attention towards their statements. It was not the first time that they brought the subject up, and he would pay it no mind.
He had vowed to never have any children of his own.
His cursed bloodline would die with him.
''…And you're great with children! I have no doubt that you would make a great father.''
''Chrom?''
Robin interrupted, as he had noticed something else that needed their immediate attention.
''I think she just soiled herself.''
He had protested at Chrom's suggestion on giving Lucina her own command.
It was too early. Yet the Exalt was adamant that his daughter took a more active role and ''mingled'' more with the Shepards.
''Look you don't even need to choose anyone for her. Henry have come with a list of people he believes would work well with her. And Cordelia confirms that it won't be an issue to group them together.''
Chrom cheerfully pointed out. This gave Robin pause, as he never felt comfortable with anything that came from that smiling dark mage.
Yet he relented in the end but saw to it that she was placed in the rear, as they moved to infiltrate Fort Steiger. Hoping that it would keep her safe from the worst of the fighting.
He failed in this, but the princess acquitted herself well when the situation turned for the worse and saved the day even if the cost was heavy among her people.
She had tried to hide it, but she was her father's daughter, caring for the people under their command was simply part of the nature. Robin could tell that she blamed herself for it.
He had not planned to approach her, but those soldiers had forced his hand. They would have stripped the dead of their valuables as was common practice, but Lucina was vehemently against it and Robin could not stay away.
Those people meant much to her, and he would see that they were honoured properly.
He would always watch over her.
Even if she did not appreciate it.
And there was another reason for him to do it. Somehow, he was certain that he knew some of the dead, but back then he could not place how, yet he had his suspicions.
This familiarity made him intervene once again, when some of the people under Lucina's command deserted shortly after only to try to sneak into the same army again a few weeks later. They were discovered, caught and questioned, but had refused to give any straight answers to any questions he gave them. Some had suggested that they were spies of the Conqueror and called for their immediate execution, but Robin had them instead sent away back to Ylisse.
Officially for ''later judgement'', but it was more for their own safety.
Fortunately, Lucina had not been in camp when it happened, and Robin had advised Chrom to not mention it.
He was certain that she would approve.
He knew by then that she had lost enough.
He was cast out, discarded like trash and thrown out into the uncaring void.
He could feel his very soul burn as it was forced out from his corrupted shell and into another.
He could see his entire life flash before him, but like sand between a hand, the memories faded from his mind, and he was only left with a few fragments.
Yet despite the pain, he felt something that he never thought to feel again.
To be free again.
He had failed.
He was so caught up with the potential danger within him that he failed to account for the danger without.
The danger that Lucina spoke of did not hide inside him this time but had instead taken a form of its own.
The form of the constantly smiling dark mage Henry.
Standing over them and preparing to end a thorn that had plagued him for too long.
Robin knew he needed to act quickly if he were to save Lucina's life. She had lost conscious from blood loss and completely helpless.
Gathering whatever strength he could muster, Robin cast a simple thunder spell at the dark mage's outstretched hand. It was a pitiful spell in terms of damage potential, but it achieved its purpose of throwing Henry's aim off. His spell barely missed Lucina's unconscious form.
''Still trying to protect her to the very end, eh? I was right to purge you from my body.''
The being they had known as Henry said in an annoying tone, as he lazily prepared another spell. This one Robin knew could create a greater crater; it would not matter if he missed this time. Robin's spell had bought them time, but nothing else.
He needed stall the dark mage further.
''Who are you?''
Robin asked. It seemed to work as Henry stopped channelling energy towards his next spell as if he was amused at the question. The small pause gave the tactician the opportunity to discreetly cauterized his wound with a fire spell.
''Oh? Isn't it obvious? I'm you.''
''Fairly certain that you're Henry. I'm Robin.''
The dark mage snorted at this. He was not amused at the tactician's cheeky retort.
''Henry? A mere vail that I wore in order to deceive you worms. An identity that I took from a fool that happened to cross my path. I'm so much more than a mere mortal. And so are you...''
The dark mage looked at the tactician with disgust.
''…Or at least you were, until I cast you out. You are a mere fragment of me, an extension of my greatness. But an extension that didn't know it's place.''
The dark mage began to once again channelling his spell.
''But none of it matters now! Thanks to your little war, I'm now strong enough to once again assume my true form! And once again become the end that shall consume you all!''
The spell he was conjuring had become a dark orb that sucked the very air around it into itself. It would not be long before it had reached its full strength.
''You ask who I'm? I'm the wings of despair. I'm the breath of ruin! I'm the fell dragon Grima! And you and that insufferable girl shall be nothing more than dust before me!''
Before Grima could cast his spell a shout was heard behind him.
''FOR YLISSE!''
Robin's efforts of stalling had worked, and Grima was caught off guard as Exalt Chrom charged him with his blade Falchion. In his desperation Grima turned and cast his spell at he charging Exalt, but missed in his haste and it exploded behind Chrom.
With another mighty roar Chrom lunged at the dark mage, but only managed to cut Grima's left hand as he managed to save himself by quickly taking a big step back. Before Chrom could deliver a second more fatal blow, the dark mage had turned himself into a swarm of crows and fled the scene.
There was no time to celebrate however, as Robin quickly urged Chrom to attend a more pressing issue.
''CHROM! LUCINA! SHE IS BLEEDING OUT!''
Their fleeing foe forgotten, Chrom immediately went to his daughter and began to close her wound with a makeshift bandage made from her cape, while Robin took out an elixir he had stored in one of his many pockets.
Carefully applying a few drops in the dying princess mouth, Robin could only pray that it would be enough to save her.
He could never forgive himself if she was to die.
Live my dear, you must live…
We are nearing the end of this story – One more chapter and then an epilogue I hope to finish this before 2024 ends. Next chapter will be a mixture of Chrom POV and Lucina's.
Thank you all for reading and seya next chapter