Chapter 2: Access
Standard Disclaimer: No, I don't own anything of the Harry Potter empire. Nope, nada, bugger-all. No money is being made here, damn it. Any resemblance to actual people, living or dead, is extremely unlikely and is unintentional if it does happen. Most of them were idiots anyway.
Timeframe and Backstory: After Hogwarts by some years. This story shares the same AU as my Aftermath stories, where Harry Potter has married Luna Lovegood. Hermione married Justin Finch-Fletchly, is now the Countess of Aberfeldy and largely does without magic. By Right of Conquest, Harry Potter is the Head of multiple formerly Dark families. There are some concepts from some of my other stories as well, such as Hogwarts: A Pre-History.
The story begins about fifteen years after the Battle of Hogwarts.
Warning: Some serious drivel, some minor character bashing.
A few weeks later, once Luna's cousin and their friend had made their tentative summer travel arrangements, Harry wrote a letter to Hogwarts to ask for permission to access the Chamber of Secrets. A few days passed and he received a reply. To his surprise, it did not come from Minerva McGonagall.
The letter read:
Dear Mr. Potter,
I have spoken to the rest of the staff here at Hogwarts, and we would all be delighted to have you visit with us while you have your associates harvest the basilisk that you killed some years ago. Please advise us when your visit will occur. If it is acceptable to you, I and many of our staff would love to accompany you and your team to see the fabled Chamber of Secrets for ourselves.
I understand that, in spite of your being the head of many old Houses, it is not in your character to be addressed as 'Lord Whatever', in spite of the English traditions. Being American myself, I sympathize with your distain for those whose only claim to fame is something their ten-times great-grandfather did, or how much money the family has. Minerva reminded me of the poem by Burns called "For a' That", and specifically the verse about 'Yon birkie called a Laird".
I should let you know that Minerva has resigned as headmistress and head of Gryffindor house. She tells me that looking at the Book of Births, she browses and reminisces about the previous years, and in her mind she can still see her students and fellow staff members who were killed in the Battle and has nightmares about the rows of bodies in the Great Hall. She also came to hate all the bureaucratic stuff she had been doing since the late Headmaster Dumbledore dumped it all onto her desk while he played his political games. She has returned to teaching Transfigurations, which she loves and her colleagues say she is much happier and doing a better job than she has for years.
Rubeus Hagrid says he would very much like to see you, and that he is still rather sad that you have to kill the basilisk before he had a chance to meet it and show it to his classes, but he understands that you were in dire straights and did what you had to do at the time. He did say he wished he could have made friends with the 'poor misunderstood creature'.
Irma Pince, our librarian, is somewhat put out that you have claimed ownership of all the documents in the Chamber, as she preserves the papers of previous headmasters. However, she recognises that you were not a staff member and your possessions are your own, and by right of conquest as well as being the only one in recent attendance here who can even get to them, she agrees that any papers you may find in the Chamber are definitely yours. She does ask that, once the documents are translated from whatever version of Old English or other languages they might be in, that you might donate copies of the readable versions to the library under her care.
Our Potions teacher, Daphne Greengrass, who I am told was a yearmate of yours but might not have been any sort of friend given the animosity between your houses, has asked if you might be willing to donate a copy of the annotated potions textbook that you once used. I gather she is still a bit put out that Hermione Granger was the only one who consistently beat her standing in potions, until you found the book at which point she came in third. She has said she understands that the standard version of the textbook does not push the limits of potioneering, so that non-brilliant students do not blow themselves (and the rest of their class) up. The copy would be either in the restricted area of the library or reserved for loan to advanced students only.
The staff are looking forward to your visit. Please inform me of your proposed schedule.
Samantha Stevens
Headmistress.
Salem Institute Class of '23
Harry was surprised when he showed the letter to his wife. Luna broke out is laughter to the point when she had to sit down before she fell down. At Harry's puzzled look, she explained "I know her daughter and grand-daughter. Samantha's family is famous in the States' wizarding community and her daughter Tabby works for the US Magical Creatures Department and I have done some research with her. Her school class was from 1723."
On the August day that Harry was to open the Chamber of Secrets so that the goblins could 'harvest' the remains of the basilisk that he had slain, he was amazed to find that there were over thirty people waiting for him by the second-floor girls' washroom. The entire staff of Hogwarts was there, as well as some who had retired, including Professor Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank who had occasionally taught the Magical Creatures class when Hagrid was unavailable. Several of Harry's old schoolmates had heard via the Hogwarts grapevine that he was coming and showing people the Chamber, and so showed up as well.
Twp surprise attendees were Bunny Scamander's grandfather and grandmother. The famous author greeted Harry explaining that in all his travels and adventures, he had never actually encountered a basilisk and so, even for just his own credibility as well as his curiosity, he just had to see the beast (or carcass) with his own eyes. Newt's wife Tina laughed at her husband's enthusiasm, commenting to Harry that Newt had talked about nothing else since he heard about the possible viewing. The two then joined their granddaughter and her friends Luna and Astrid who were chatting with Hagrid and Professor Grubbly-Plank (please call me 'Willy') in a group that Hagrid would later refer to as 'the Critter Girls'.
Luna's father Xenophilius (call me 'Xeno') was attending as well. He and Newt Scamander had been corresponding for many decades, with their common interest in unusual and fantastic creature. Newt's claim to have found another species of snorkacks had Xeno quite excited, but the chance of seeing a basilisk carcass put that excursion on hold.
Some came because they simply didn't believe that Harry Potter had done the things people say he did – there was no way a half-blood could have done them, and they wanted to see the 'famous Chosen One' proven to be a liar. The fact that Harry had never bragged about his exploits didn't faze their belief he was a glory-hound.
Of course, all of the fangirls had arrived, either to see for themselves the exploits of their fixation, or just bask in his presence again. Some had brought their younger sisters, and one or two had brought their daughters to perpetuate the 'cult'.
Among the younger girls, some of whom had just started Hogwarts, several were wearing their dark hair long and straight and wearing glasses whether they needed them or not. As they entered the bathroom, Moaning Myrtle appeared quite enraged, until one of the girls with straight hair shouted out "Moaning Myrtle! How wonderful!". The ghost looked shocked at this, until another of the 'Myrtle' girls looked at her with admiration and said "We read all about you in Lady Hermione's books, telling about her time at Hogwarts, and how you were killed and how you helped them because of your crush on Mr. Potter. We think you are great."
Myrtle looked puzzled. "You're not making fun of me like Olive Hornsby? You like me?" The girls all frantically nodded, and for the first time in over half a century, Moaning Myrtle smiled (other then the times she was ogling Harry in the prefects' bath). To Harry's acute embarrassment, she said with a cheeky smirk "Well, he was really cute in the prefects' bathtub wearing absolutely nothing, and I saw all of him, and I do mean ALL."
At this admission, all of the fangirls, past and future, blushed while some obviously wished that they had had the same opportunity that Myrtle has just admitted to.
Having heard some of the rumours about the entrance and exit, some had brought brooms so they could get out easily from the access hole. One of the goblin workmen made a comment in Goblinese, and Deputy Headmaster Flitwick translated – "You won't need those brooms. These workmen are going to build a staircase up the sides of the tunnel while we are down there. You really didn't think that they were going to lug around three tons of body parts up using ropes, did you?"
Having heard Harry's description of his trip down to the Chamber, once Harry whispered the words of parceltongue to open the hole, the entire Hogwarts staff surrounded the hole fired 'scourgify' spells down the hole to clean it out. After about ten minutes, the return air-blast had stopped stinking too badly, and the party proceeded to jump into the hole yelling everything from 'Geronimo' and 'Here goes nothing', to curses in several languages.
When the group had all landed in the muck and detritus at the bottom of the hole, the goblins took one look at the tunnel and another at Hagrid, and began to clear the floor and enlarge the tunnel substantially, so the large man would not have to proceed on all fours. On seeing the shed basilisk skins along the corridor, two of the goblins began to point at them and have quiet discussions in their own language. Their boss pulled out some parchment and was frantically scribbling notes, while he discussed the matter with the two workmen. Both were nodded in agreement as the group waited for the work-goblins to clear the rockfall and reinforce the ceiling.
When the group got to the sealed door to the Chamber, decorated by all of the snakes Harry had not seen himself for almost two decades, he turned to the work boss and asked if, when he opened the door, it could be enlarged so that Hagrid could enter the Chamber in a more dignified manner instead of having to crawl in.
While the goblins were examining the door for its magic so as to assess the feasibility of enlarging it, Harry turned to the group.
"Anyone who knows how to cast the bubblehead charm may want to use it and to offer it to your neighbours. It was a little rank in there. I or some of the professors can help anyone who wishes it"."
Some of the group nodded and started casting while others scowled. "Potter, how weak do you thing we are? We are fully trained witches and wizards, and we think that all the stories about your exploits are a load of thestral dung. We will take out chances." The ones nodding their heads at this were mostly those who had worn the 'Potter Stinks' buttons in fourth year and had brought their children along to witness Potter getting a bit of comeuppance.
Harry shrugged. "Okay, but remember that I offered."
Getting the nod from the goblins, he turned and gave the 'Open' command in parceltongue.
Stepping through the enlarged opening, the group got a few seconds of their view of the carcass before the stench of a thousand years of decay hit them. There are few things that lower the respect for one's parents than watching them fall to their knees emptying their stomachs and intestinal tracks of everything they had consumed for the previous fortnight or more.
Harry shrugged his shoulders. "I did offer."
One of the goblins tasked with the salvage job looked at the carcass and muttered something in his own language. The boss goblin and Professor Flitwick doubled over laughing at this.
At Harry's puzzled look to him, the short professor explained "What he said would translate verbatim into English as 'Excrement sanctified by all the deities. I suspect you are likely more familiar with a shorter version of the same concept". Those who were not otherwise occupied joined the laughter.
The chief goblin then held up his hand and called out sharply "Everyone halt. Do not go any farther until we secure this worksite! Before starting any dangerous job, a good manager will hold a site meeting to go over what we are to do and what hazards we expect. I have lost good people on jobs where this was not done by those in charge, and this will not happen today. I should remind my team that shirking responsibility for deaths among your staff leads to your own death and I do not wish to have to follow that practice here!"
"Curse-breaker Foundthings, come forward!" An old scarred goblin approached and bowed "Chief Project Manager Dothings, I come at your command. What task have you for me?"
The had goblin nodded at his subordinate. "As far as I have been told, only four persons have entered this chamber before us. I trust that Major Account Holder Potter would not have set any traps, but I am aware from our hunt for the Dark Lord's horcruxes, that he often devised deadly charms and wards. Of the original occupant, I know nothing other than he was a skilled wizard for whom this chamber was his secret place. Your task is to find and eliminate all charms and wards which may harm our progress with our work at hand." The curse-breaker bowed again, and proceeded to explore the chamber.
One of the former Hogwarts students (and an ex-Slytherin house member) shook his head. "Everybody know what Slytherin was like" he stated confidently.
Luna Potter smiled in anticipation. She loved it when someone clearly and loudly believed something that 'everybody knows'. In almost all cases, they were entirely wrong, so she asked "It's been sometime since I was at school, and being in Ravenclaw, we didn't get the full stories about Slytherin but we love to learn. Can you fill me in on the details?"
The Slytherin student should have known better, seeing Luna's smile as she set the trap he proudly walked into. He declaimed, 'Well, for one, he hated Muggles and other mudbloods! He taught only purebloods who he knew were better than other wizards. Gryffindors were beneath his contempt, and he was a master of the Dark Arts. Everybody knows that!"
Luna smiled. "So, it is just like everybody knew that Harry grew up in a palace, that he defeated a dragon when he was seven, and he was the Heir of Slytherin. And he rode a white Pegasus to and from all his battles against evil wizards and monsters. Good to know." The Slytherin student looked puzzled as she snickered. Harry knew his wife's grin that she sported whenever things didn't add up; he had seen it often enough when he tried to make excuses for his own transgressions.
The ex-Slytherin grimaced when he considered the implications. Still, he wanted to defend himself and his family. "Well, that's what my parents told me growing up, and they wouldn't lie to me." Even so, he had a feeling that he had just been had, and in public.
Harry smiled. "Perhaps the ones who told them had lied to them. Like all those books written about my childhood, or all that crap that Lockhart palmed off on the gullible public."
One of the younger girls frowned. "You didn't do all those things?" As Harry shook his head, she added, "That's why everyone knew you would finish of You-know-who. because you did all those wonderful things and so they could depend on you to save them."
Harry smiled at his wife, as he said "It have been years since I put down the Dark Wanker, and people still can't say his name! How about you start referring to him as Tom Riddle, because that was his real name. Everyone knew he was a pure-blood, but that was a lie he told to his bigoted followers. They bought into the lie, because it was something they desperately wanted to be true, but what he was after was power, pure power, and he used them for the fools they were. And everyone else bought into the lie too!"
"Think about it. He claimed he was immortal, but all his followers were ready to die for him. From his point-of-view, they were going to die anyway, so why should he care about them?"
After several minutes of looking around and making meaningful gestures at a number of locations, the curse-breaker reported. "There were several harmful charms in this room. None are older than 80 years old, so I conclude that the original occupant did not cast any, relying on the secrecy of the place. There were two strong compulsion charms on the corpse of the basilisk, the newer one meant to direct the beast to harm other persons, while the original much older charm was directed at protecting others from harm. There were no wards in place. All the charms and compulsions have been removed and the area is clear of malicious traps."
The chief nodded and said "Well done. We may proceed with our work. Work party, to your duties!"
One of the ex-students who had been rather sceptical about Harry's achievements looked over to him from where she knelt and said 'Okay Potter. I apologize. They were right about what you did. I believe you now."
Harry smiled at her and the others who were still in some distress, and nodded. You know, there were times when even I didn't believe some of the stuff that happened, and some days I can't understand how I survived Hogwarts. Safest place in Britain, my ass."
Most of the goblins were busily measuring the carcass, cleaning up the Chamber of the years of detritus, applying the goblin version of powerful air-freshening charms, and comparing notes of the previous estimates. Others were exploring the Chamber to see what else might lie in it.
After a very short time, one of the Gringotts staff, waved his claws and called "Property Assessor Silverhand and Major Account Holder Potter, I believe I have found the office and potions laboratory. Please come here. The place is a mess but there is potentially much of value within."
Harry was always amused that in the goblins' world, all honorifics had to do with property and money. A goblin's rank, as in the Royal Navy, was earned by merit and competence, although sometimes a promotion came when one's immediate superior was removed for incompetence or malfeasance. Sometimes, if the misdeeds were serious or involved theft from an account, the removal involved the head of the miscreant. As such, a goblin's rank was jealously guarded and held in high esteem.