Phase-17: The hidden Truth

After having cleared the path from the Mahamul base to the Mediteranean Sea, the LHM-BB01 Minerva was ordered to veer up north to the Diocuia Base at the south coast of the Black Sea. However, they had not been told why or what to do there so the crew was a bit disconcerted. Well, it was a ZAFT base so at least they knew they weren't going to fight. It wasn't that ZAFT had conquered the region through military might, but the people had chosen to side with them and allowed the creation of this base that acted like a sort of enclave. The relations with the locals were respectful and friendly. That's why, once they arrived, they couldn't help but get their hopes up. Aside from the military base, the beautiful city looked like a sea resort perfect for sightseeing, a true touristic spot. Could they have been given some time off as thanks for their hard work? As he walked down the gangway with the captain, Trine noted it had been ages since they had seen a city like this. Gladys agreed. Indeed, with only the sea, the base, and the rocky mountains, everything had been rather bleak. Then again, they were not on Earth to enjoy the scenery. Still, it would be great if they could relax a little here. Everyone would certainly be thrilled.

A number of crew members had gathered in the lounge to watch the city on the screen. That included Asuka and the Hawke sisters. When Seren and Athrun came in (with Chacha sprawled atop the young woman's head), Lunamaria beamed and ran to the young man, to Meyrin's displeasure. Shinn also looked at them with a sulky expression. Heine appeared behind the (fakely) smiling Seren and placed his hands on her shoulders and gently pushed her inside (under Athrun's watchful gaze) as they were blocking the way.

The ship captain and vice-captain were quite confused by what they were seeing though. A huge crowd of people, probably nearly everyone currently in this base, had gathered before what looked like a stage, like for a concert... why? Even civilians had come, many of them, though of course they had to stay behind the fence. Well, one had climbed it a bit for a better view and others had climbed the trees. There were children too. And then the event began.

"Everybody! It's Lacus Clyne!" Meer Campbell greeted the spectators from atop the palm of a pink ZAKU Warrior customized for the occasion and supported by two DINNs. They were descending from the sky. The pink ZAKU had 'LOVE!' painted on the cockpit, a heart and a red haro on the shoulders, and 'Lacus Clyne Alive!' on the shield with yellow stars. The soldiers were cheering. Flying above them was what seemed to be a highly upgraded Osprey. Inside, Lacus' manager was worried about her and had his face against the window while Chairman Durandal smiled at him. And seeing their idol on the screen, the Minerva crew rejoiced too, especially Vino and Yolan. The ones who weren't happy but simply shocked were Athrun and Seren. The Savior's pilot backed against the wall and put his hand before his mouth while the operator of the Fortuna was just frozen, like she had gone blank.

Meer was singing her lively remix of Shizuka na Yoru ni and dancing, posing. The ZAKU's pilot sometimes moved the suit's hand and let the singer jump on the other palm. Some Minerva crew members (like Vino and Yolan) rushed to see her while others like Shinn coolly headed there. For some reason Shinn too had a confused expression. Some people though prefered watching from a distance. Among them was Athrun flanked by Meyrin and Luna. Seren was there too, Chacha on her shoulder. After leaving the ship, Heine had immediately been called out somewhere. Zala remembered what the young mechanics were saying about how Lacus had completely changed her style and he frowned slightly. Meer was really TOO different.

"You didn't know she was coming here?" The older sister inquired.

"Huh? Ah... well... no..." The dark haired young man stammered.

"Well, it wasn't as if either of you had the luxury to keep in touch with each other." Lunamaria leant in slightly and directed her upward gaze towards him before smiling. Her sibling glared at her, fully aware of her aim. After all, Luna had been sticking close to the elite commander from the start, doing her best to act and sound as cute as she could to attract his attention.

"Ah, but... yeah, kinda..." Athrun stuttered again. However, Meyrin saw her chance when a running soldier bumped into her. She yelped and bumped into Athrun, hugging his arm.

"I'm sorry, someone bumped into me from behind." She apologised... but didn't let go. And it was Luna's turn to glare at her, her hands on her hips.

Seren stared at them with a lukewarm gaze. Somehow, this situation was incredibly ridiculous. Those two sisters were fighting over Athrun while knowing he had an official fiancée, Lacus, in front of his actual girlfriend and betrothed, that was her, Seren... so she couldn't help shaking her head and sighing. Her robotic pet chattered. Though, as indeed they were in the middle of the way and people were often running to join the fun, Athrun offered to change locations and started escorting Meyrin by the shoulders. Wait! What was Athrun doing?! Was he acting like that on purpose? Or was he truly oblivious to their crush on him and their attacks?! Or maybe he didn't notice girls other than her? No, but they were pretty obvious, and he had been trained to be alert to his surroundings... Which was it?! She should trust Athrun, she did trust him... but after all she found it quite unpleasant to have girls all over the man she loved and with whom she had exchanged promises and engagement rings. They had to keep up the act for the Chairman's sake. The fake Lacus was one thing... but did it occur to him that she wouldn't like seeing other girls clinging to him like that, or him escorting them the way he did? Then was that it? Was that part of the act? Should she act the same?

While she was pondering, the pilot of the Savior turned to her. She hadn't moved from her spot. He saw her smile that did not reach her eyes and a sudden chill ran up his spine. He didn't know what she was thinking, but it couldn't be good! He quickly ran back to her and took her hand to lead her to the others. The amber-eyed girl obediently followed, but her mind still didn't seem quite there. Shinn came back and asked if it was alright for him not to watch the (his fiancée's) show. Zala stammered his assent again.

Talia and Arthur were watching the performance from a corner. But while the deputy captain was focused on the stage and was moving in rhythm, the woman looked around and noticed the Chairman greeting officials. Heine was among them. Durandal caught her staring and nodded to her. Trine happily commented how lucky they were.

"Good grief." Gladys sighed, a bit exasperated. How could her second in command be so optimistic or thoughtless, simply enjoying himself and never trying to look beyond the surface. She walked away. Lacus stopped singing, caught a bouquet thrown at her and waved at the fans.

"Thank you! I'm so glad to have this opportunity to see you all! All you courageous ZAFT soldiers, thank you for your efforts for peace! And to the people of Diocuia, I'll keep praying that this war will soon come to an end! So let's keep working together until that day comes!" Meer declared very light-heartedly.

"You know, Lacus-san has really changed." Meyrin noted. She and her sister were sticking VERY close to the male FAITH member inbetween them. They had their back against a container.

"No? Ah... yeah... well, a bit..." Athrun, who had been deep in thought, stammered.

"That isn't Lacus Clyne." Canaver suddenly spoke... or dropped a bomb that shocked Athrun. What was she doing... spilling things like that?! He didn't show it much, but inside he was totally panicking.

"Hey, you don't have to be mean like that! Just because you prefer the way she was before doesn't give you the right to deny what she has become!" The owner of the red ZAKU scolded.

"...You're right..." Seren answered after a pause as her fake smile returned, now tinted with bitterness, though that smile was directed more towards Athrun... like 'see? No matter what you say, they won't believe it, they won't question anything...' And although it was good for the Chairman's plan, as the real Lacus' friend, she just found it sad and disappointing that all these people who claim to be Lacus' fans could be so easily deceived and could dismiss all those blatant discrepancies as a simple "change"... So after all, she'd like more people to be suspicious of that 'Lacus'. "But I was just wondering... is it really possible for someone to change their nature, style and personality to that extent? I just couldn't help but find it strange... And rather than doing support concerts like this, encouraging soldiers to fight so light-heartedly, she used to speak against war with a strong voice full of conviction and determination, right? And compared to that Lacus, this one is..." She sighed and turned towards the stage with a disappointed expression. The girls looked at the singer again with pensive expressions.

Athrun was glaring at her, silently reproaching her. But Seren ignored him. Yes, she was acting on emotions. Cagalli had apparently rubbed off on her. And she had also grown more selfish... or less good at holding herself back for the sake of others? The Chairman had told them the situation was only momentary but she just couldn't blindly trust him. So of course she'd act if there was no sign of improvement. Even if she could not reveal things now, just sowing doubts and doing some groundwork should still prove useful at a later time... even if it meant ungratefully driving a wedge into the plan of the Chairman to whom she was indebted. She felt like she couldn't... shouldn't just remain passive and silently accept things. She knew the Chairman acted for the people. But even if it was selfish of her, she had to fight back, somehow...

Watching the idol, Durandal was smirking. Right behind the fence, freelance reporter Miriallia Haw was taking many photos. However, she had no idea that Seren and Athrun could be in this base, nor had those two ZAFT pilots noticed her either. Three unassuming youths, who had also been observing the base from their sportscar by the roadside, drove away now that the show had ended. Not a single ZAFT soldier here could have imagined that the culprits who had stolen the units at Armory One would have been right here 'enjoying' Lacus Clyne's live concert.

Auel noted how ZAFT seemed to be having fun and wondered if they were still going to go after that ship. Sting thought so. That was what Neo wanted. To them what mattered was not where this war was heading but to 'kill or be killed'. And yet they'd been on a losing streak recently whenever it came to that ship. Nettled, Nieder retorted that they hadn't lost (after all, they were still alive), but Sting reminded him that as long as they didn't win (and sunk that ship), it was a loss. Losses were not tolerated in Phantom Pain. Meanwhile, seemingly oblivious to their serious conversation, Stella who had been spacing out, staring at the sky, suddenly grinned and giggled like a child when her violet eyes fell on the sparkling sea.

Heine joined them and remarked that Athrun sure was popular, having two girls at his arms. The young man with midnight blue hair, having – finally – realized his situation, suddenly blushed and stuttered and sheepishly looked at Seren who was smiling just like earlier.

"I am personally glad my childhood friend is popular, since that means he's that excellent... but I'm curious to know what his fiancée would feel if she saw such a scene..." Canaver's smile blackened as much as it stretched to her ears, placing a troubled hand on her cheek, feigning worry. Hearing the rebuke in her jab, the three instinctively moved away from each other and straightened up. But only Athrun could tell the true meaning of her words. "Is the prince just oblivious? Or could it be he doesn't have eyes for anyone except his princess?" She stabbed again under cover of teasing.

"No... Seren... that's... I..."

"Okay, that's enough teasing and chaperoning." Heine put a stop to it by placing a hand on Canaver's shoulder. "The Chairman is here and asking for all of the Minerva's pilots. Rey is already headed to the hotel with Gladys-kanchou, and I was told to get you three, and Shinn. So let's hurry and find Shinn." And like this, his arm wrapped around her shoulders, Heine took Seren away the same way Athrun had escorted Meyrin earlier. Chacha moved onto him. Only Meyrin noticed how Athrun had tensed up and how he was clenching his fists. She peaked into his tight face. His gaze was fixed on Heine, and especially Seren. She looked at Seren's back, and at Athrun's face again. And as he started running after them, the siblings followed.

"Seriously, I'm amazed by you. To think you'd come to such a place." Talia commented as she joined the Chairman on the terrace of a large manor. Well, it looked like one, but it was a high class hotel. Trine had returned to the Minerva to oversee the various repairs. Lacus was leaving the base in a limousine for a tour of the town, the windows open so she could greet her fans and wave at them. The inside of the car was full of flower bouquets.

"Were you surprised?"

"Yes, of course I was surprised." She saluted, as did Rey who was accompanying her. "Well, it's not like it's the first time."

"You look well. I've heard of your accomplishments. I'm pleased." Gilbert walked to them with a smile. Then he turned to the Red Coat. "It's been ages since we met like this."

"Gil..." Rey whispered, showing his most heartfelt expression of happiness as he suddenly hugged the man who hugged him back. Even though he had been acting so professionally and reserved, right now they looked nothing less than father and child.

The rest of the Minerva's elite pilots arrived at the manor. Durandal, Gladys, and Rey were already seated at a table on the terrace, the two adults on one side and boy on the other. Talia asked the Chairman if there had been movement from the Atlantic Federation, since he wouldn't have made the trip all the way here otherwise. But before he could answer, Heine, Athrun, Seren, Shinn and Luna were escorted here. The robotic animal started flying around. Gilbert stood up and walked over to them.

"Hi there, it has been awhile, Athrun, Seren." He greeted. The pilots saluted, but he held out his hand. Athrun took it. Then it was Seren's turn.

"Seren, it seems you saved many lives at the Lohengrin Gate battle. Without you, our losses would have been much more important. I'm truly glad you're here." The black-haired man squeezed her hand in both of his. Luna and Shinn also introduced themselves when he turned to them. They looked somewhat nervous and awed. That person was truly an exceptional leader and yet he wasn't cold or arrogant at all, but truly close to the people... he was exceptional as a man too. "I remember you well." He told Shinn who lowered his eyes in obvious embarrassment and regret. After all, the only chance the Chairman had to directly see Shinn was when the boy had lashed out at Cagalli Yula Athha and at Seren in the hangar of the Minerva when the Chairman and Captain Gladys had taken them on a tour of the ship right after the Armory One incident. Right... now Shinn realized how rude and immature he had acted back then.

"Well, Shinn sure has a knack for standing out... in both good and bad ways..." Canaver teased, causing the Impulse's operator to poutily glare back at her. However, he looked down again, blushing, when he saw her warm smile. After all, even though he kept badmouthing her, she never held it against him. She wasn't as clueless as he thought she was. And although she had some naïve sides, and he couldn't agree with her idealism, he could respect her strength and kindness.

"I've been hearing about your great achievements. In fact, I received a recommendation for a decoration. You'll be informed of the results shortly." Gilbert told the child whose whole face lit up like on a Christmas morning.

"Th-thank you very much!" Asuka grabbed the Chairman's outstretched hand in both of his.

"I heard you performed brilliantly at the Lohengrin Gate battle too. And to think that the first time you actuallly launched was at the incident of Armory One... it's quite impressive..."

"That's because the plan Commander Zala and Seren-san came up with was flawless. I... I just followed it."

"This town was liberated thanks to the efforts all of you put in to take down the enemy post. You've all done a wonderful job." The head of state continued praising the soldiers. Luna thanked him happily. Then, they all sat down. "In any case, the world is in a very chaotic state right now." Gilbert took a sip of tea. Gladys inquired about what was happening in space, for instance about the Earth Forces' lunar base. "It's the same as always. There have been some small skirmishes from time to time, but that's all. As for the situation here on Earth, I have absolutely no idea what's going on. Just like the towns around here, there are regions that oppose the Alliance and call to us for aid. What in the world are we doing?"

"Are there no signs of a ceasefire, or a cessation of hostilities?" Seren questioned. Chacha had returned to her pocket.

"Unfortunately not. The Alliance refuses to concede anything at all. We don't want this war to continue, but with things as they are, there's nothing we can do about it. Well, this may not be something I should be discussing with soldiers like you. Choosing the path that ends the battle or avoids fighting is indeed far more difficult than choosing the path to war..."

"But-" Shinn suddenly interrupted, surprising everyone who turned towards him. "Oh... I'm sorry." He apologised for his rudeness. But then Durandal encouraged him to keep talking without reservation. Comments from those who actually fought on the frontline were very valuable. He had invited them here so he could hear about them. "I do agree that it's best to make it so there's no need to fight, if possible. But fighting is something that cannot be avoided when you are threatened by the enemy. We have to fight when the time calls for it, otherwise we won't be able to protect anything, not even ourselves. Those living normal lives in peace ought to be protected!"

"However, doing that..." Athrun began. "Someone once told me, "one kills because someone is killed, and then gets killed because he had killed... Just when is that going to end? ...Just how is that going to bring us closer to peace?" When asked, I was unable to come up with an answer. And still without an answer, I find myself back on the battlefield."

"That's right. That's where the problem lies." Gilbert stood and walked away. "Why do we keep fighting if there's no end in sight? Why can't wars be eliminated? Even when people throughout history have cried out that they hated war. Why do you think so, Shinn?" He turned to the boy.

"... I think it's because in every era, there have always been selfish, foolish people, like Blue Cosmos, and the Atlantic Federation... am I wrong?" He spoke with a mixture of hope and anxiety, like a middle school kid interrogated in History class.

"No, well, you do have a point. There's that too. 'I want what others have. They're different from me. I hate them. They're frightening. They're wrong.' It's true that people keep fighting for those reasons. But war has a more hopeless, aggravating side, something we are less able to save ourselves from... From exemple, Heine's unit, ZGMF-X2000 GOUF Ignited... that machine just very recently came out of the military factory. Since we're fighting a war, new models are manufactured one after another. On a battlefield, missiles are fired, mobile suits are hit, and countless things are destroyed. In the meantime, new missiles and mobile suits are made in the factories and sent to the front from both sides. The production lines are bogged down by the demand and can't keep up. Think a moment about the cost of just that one unit. If we were to consider all this as a business like any other, there would be no other with such a high turnover rate or with such huge profits..."

"Chairman, speaking about something like that..." Gladys said uncomfortably.

"But that's..." Shinn stammered.

"Yes, as we're waging war, that's a matter of fact, something that can't be helped. But humans are creatures who will easily think the opposite once they realize a profit can be made. That also cannot be helped. When a war ends, weapons are no longer needed. Then there's no profit. However, if wars occur, that's very lucrative for them. Therefore, wouldn't war be something they'd want to happen by any means?" Durandal developed. Shinn cried out in indignation. "That's the enemy, they're dangerous. We must fight. We were attacked, we can't forgive them. We must fight. The history of mankind is fraught with people exclaiming such things, who incite others to fight, think of war as an industry, and who manufactured wars themselves... all for their own profit. Even now, hiding in the shadows of this war, we'll find LOGOS without a doubt, since they're also the nucleus of Blue Cosmos. That's why the difficulty lies there. As long as they're pulling the strings, the PLANTS and the Earth will probably continue to fight. I would like to do something about that if I can... but that itself, will be more difficult than anything else."

"But even if we are spurred on by those merchants of death, we are still the ones pulling the trigger. We must take responsibility for our actions. No matter how tempting it is, it is still wrong to try and shift the entire blame. Even if LOGOS was to disappear, it wouldn't change much if others appeared and controlled us the same way. As those who actually take lives, we must carry and accept that weight. If we escape responsibility, we can't grow. It's natural to resent those who kill the ones you love. But if everyone acts on those feelings there will be no one to break the cycle. That resentment, that pain, that urge to kill, to get revenge... those feelings are the strings with which we are being manipulated. I used to kill while engulfed by those feelings, until I just couldn't take it anymore. I understood that to break the cycle, I had to be strong enough to endure and repress these emotions. Rather than being a puppet that blindly cuts down an assigned enemy, I chose to wield my sword to cut those strings and let people live." Seren spoke. "And to that end, I intend to make full use of the power you gave me..." She pointed at her FAITH insignia with her thumb. ""It's fine if you just pledge loyalty to your ideals and truths. You are people who follow their own beliefs regardless of current trends and are able to fight when necessary. So please use this power; not just for ZAFT or the PLANTs but for everyone to live in a peaceful world." It's because you said that that Athrun and I are here now. And you also said "Should we end up taking a wrong turn, I'm counting on you two to guide us back onto the right path." So I will do my best to fulfil those requests and live up to your expectations." She smiled.

"...Yes, I'll be relying on you even more from now on." Durandal smiled too. Even though she appeared and sounded gentle, she had given him quite a barbed reminder.

A black limousine stopped at the entrance of the manor and Meer Campbell rushed out of the car and inside the mansion. Her manager went after her, his arms full of bouquets and telling her not to run.

"Is it really okay?" Lunamaria questioned. Durandal and the Minerva crewmembers were walking up a roofed, projecting passageway along the upper floor. The building side was lined with tall arched windows while the balcony had a stone balustrade and arches and overlooked the city. At their feet was a red carpet.

"Yes, it's your time off. And the Chairman has kindly extended the invitation." Talia reassured her. "So take him up on the offer and relax here. You've all more than earned this much."

"There's no need to hesitate, Shinn, Lunamaria. I'll go back to the ship." Since at least one pilot had to stay on standby on the Minerva, the considerate commander Zala decided to take on that role and let his young subordinates enjoy themselves.

"I'll be the one to go back to the ship." Rey interrupted him. "Please stay here with them, Commander." For once he was smiling amiably. Athrun protested though. "The Minerva's top pilots, most worthy of the reward, are you, Commander, Seren, and Shinn. On top of being worthy of the reward, Seren is a woman, just like Lunamaria... what I'm saying makes the most sense."

"Athrun!" A female voice squealed from a head of them. A girl with long pink hair was running towards the group.

"Me...er." The green-eyed pilot was so shocked he unwittingly voiced her real name. She stopped in from of them.

"If it isn't Lacus Clyne. Thank you so much for your hard work." Gilbert greeted her.

"Thank you very much." Meer lightly bowed to him. "When I heard you were here in the hotel, I came back as fast as I could!" She rushed to the back to hug Athrun, bumping into Lunamaria and Seren without noticing or caring, not sparing a single glance for anyone but her 'fiancé'. He didn't hug her back and awkwardly spoke her name again. "Did you see my performance today?" She let go and took a step back. Durandal smiled fondly at them.

"Huh? Ah... yeah..."

"Really?! How was it?!" Her passion was in stark contrast to his reserved attitude.

"Ah... uh... well..." He replied noncommittally. Lunamaria humphed. Seren pretended to be taken by the pretty sunset scenery.

"I've just invited them all to rest here for the night. Please, the two of you should at least take this opportunity to have dinner together. It has been a long time after all." The Chairman suggested, troubling Athrun and irritating Luna and the young female FAITH member. Her pet robot seemed to choose this timing to climb out of her pocket onto her shoulder and touch her cheek while chattering.

"Oh my, could we? That would make me so happy!" The fake Lacus hugged Zala's arm. "Athrun, I'll go make reservations right away!"

"Oh, but before you go, can I have a moment of your time, Athrun, Seren?" The PLANTs leader requested.

And so, a moment later, Meer was sitting on a bench with her red haro, while Seren, Athrun and Durandal were discussing a distance away near the fountain. Meer had tried to play with Chacha too but he had escaped her and only returned to Seren once she had moved away from Meer. The Chairman wanted to talk about the Archangel. The young man gasped slightly and the girl frowned.

"I'm sure you heard the news. I've been wondering where that ship went after it left Orb. And I thought maybe you would have some information about it."

"No. It's been on my mind constantly, but I don't know anything either. In fact, I was thinking of asking you about it..." Zala spoke, clearly anxious about his friends. Gilbert turned to the young woman, hoping for a different answer.

"I haven't contacted or received any contact from anyone since joining the Minerva. But if it's those guys, I'm sure they're fine." Canaver raised her hands. Although she seemed rather lackadaisical, she was actually observing that man's reactions like a hawk. The PLANTs leader faintly narrowed his eyes.

"Is that so? You see, if the Freedom and Archangel left Orb, I thought she – the real Lacus Clyne – might be with them..."

"Yes, I don't think there's any doubt of that. Kira wou-... ah, no, if that ship left, there's no way they would have left Lacus behind." Athrun replied.

"Given the current situation, I had hoped she would truly come back to the PLANTs so I've been looking for her. I wonder if she has finally gotten disgusted with us for only doing the same things over and over." The PLANTs leader gazed into the distance. But then Haro came and disturbed them.

"I wouldn't worry, she's as strong as she's kind. If she doesn't return to the PLANTs, there's surely a reason. Maybe they're wary because of Meer. After all, you have a motive for acting against the real one: if her opinion differs from yours, the people will be divided. But with a doll controlled by you, you can exploit her influence as much as you want without a single risk..." Seren probed with a smile, her serious eyes fixed on his. Athrun cried her name disapprovingly. And something flashed in Durandal's thin eyes and he drew breath almost imperceptibly. But then he closed those eyes and smiled good-heartedly before looking at his fake Lacus.

"I guess you're right... Using Meer might be the optimal solution for us at this time, but seen from their perspective, it must be as you said. It cannot be helped then..." He sighed dejectedly.

"If only they talked to you, they'd understand you'd never do something like this. I hope that this misunderstanding will be cleared as soon as possible. Like us, they're people who wish for peace and coexistence. We will inform you as soon as we have news, so you too, could you please contact us when you do?" The girl requested. She looked like she was sorry for troubling him.

"Okay, I get it. I'll do that." He smiled and left. Meer was about to happily join her persona's official fiancé when Zala stopped her and took Seren away by the arm out of earshot. Athrun was angry at Seren for being so hostile with the Chairman, earlier and now. He was tightly gripping her arms below her shoulders. But she wasn't fazed. After all, she had expected him to react like that. Certainly, she had chosen to come and serve Durandal. And she was attracted to him like a knight seeking a worthy king... very much so. But this situation didn't sit well with her. She had just wanted to make sure he was the right man for the job. If he was truly the one, he should accept her doubts, critiques, and respond to her with trust and prove himself. If he was not, if he moved against her because he couldn't tolerate someone who spoke their mind, then they'd know he was a tyrant disguised as a saint. A weak leader could destroy his own country. But with that man's competence, with his charm and power of persuasion, then he could move the whole world the way he wanted. And no matter how righteous that person may seem, it was just wrong for the world to be controlled by just the will of a single man. "Athrun, as much as I admire Chairman Durandal, in the same time, I can't help but be also scared of him. So given everything I had to abandon, my country, my family... and my fiancé... so I could serve him, isn't it only natural for me to expect something in return?" Canaver glared back and touched Athrun's left ring finger, where the proof of engagement she had given him should have been. He recoiled as if he had been stung.

"No... that's... I'm still..." He still loved her, and the Chairman had told them the engagement with Lacus was only in public, and that in private they could still be together... And it was only a temporary thing too...

"I have a right to know what kind of person the Chairman is exactly. I came here for that very reason. So of course, I will need to test him out. And he should understand that and reassure me. It's true that I want to believe, but I just can't blindly trust him, not with the methods he uses. I don't want to deceive people I want to consider as my comrades. I feel alienated. So tell me, how long should we keep this up?"

In Orb she had lamented about her powerlessness, and sought a place where she could be useful to those she loved. And now, here, even though she had gone for their sake, she missed them and sought solace, a place that her heart could call 'home'. She was strong, but isolation and loneliness made her very insecure and vulnerable. He had no idea she was feeling like this. Even though he was by her side, and she knew he loved her and only her, she should have no reason to feel isolated or lonely... She was much more uneasy about the attitude of the surroundings that he had imagined. She used not to care much about it. That was because she held others at arm length... before she came to rely on others... on him... And now she felt isolated, like she could no longer rely on him... because their relationship was not officially recognized?! Although he was glad to be loved this much, he was angry that she seemed to have so little faith in him. As if he'd let her anxiousness get in the way!

"You idiot! Why don't you rely on me?!" He hugged her as strongly as he could, like he wanted to crush her.

"Shouldn't you hug your fiancée? In any case, I also have an appointment tonight, so let's go back."

"What?! With whom?!"

But Seren simply shook her head without answering. She was smiling. He reluctantly let go and they returned to Meer who ran back to them and hugged Athrun's arm. Heine was waiting at the hotel entrance. The girl with reddish brown hair went to him.

"Is it alright, now?" Westenfluss asked for confirmation.

"Yes, let's go."

"Yeah, we shouldn't disturb them any longer." He winked at Athrun and took Seren by the shoulders again.

"Ah, wait! Heine, Seren!" Zala stopped them, sounding very flustered. They stopped and turned to him. "Mee-... Lacus, I have something to discuss with them both, so if you'll excuse me..." He quickly escaped from her, shoved his way inbetween his two fellow FAITH agents, placed his right hand on Heine's back and left arm around Seren's waist and pushed them forward in a hurry.

"Eh? Wha-!" Meer cried in surprised and took a few steps. But after all, she was unable to stop them, or rather, to stop him. Heine and Seren too were surprised and unable to stop Athrun's momentum, though deep down Seren was secretly happy that Athrun had chosen and managed to come with them.

The three went to a bar and started drinking and eating snacks. Westenfluss questioned Zala again. Was it really alright for him to leave his fiancée hanging like that? Athrun said it was fine... while thinking he had actually been saved, and that he was much more reluctant to leave him alone with Seren... a young man and a young woman having such a friendly relation, going drinking just the two of them, and if they ended up drunk... There was no way he could allow that! What was Seren thinking?! Or was it retaliation?! Was she trying to pull him back to her by making him jealous?

"My squad was disbanded." Heine said. "At the end of our time off, I alone will return to the Minerva with you guys. They're meant to come here later, and Seren intended to go back soon after their arrival. Now I'm glad she won't have to return to the hotel alone."

"So that's how it was." The midnight-blue haired youth sounded relieved.

"I'll have you know that I can take care of myself." Seren chided them.

"Right... You're strong... that time too, you protected us..."

"Ah, no... I... I'm sorry..." The girl hung her head and tightened her grip on the glass. Athrun asked what it was about as the mood had taken a turn for the worst and both looked sad. Heine informed him that one of his squad members had been killed during the attack on the Lohengrin Gate. They had been performing their duties as normal while on ship, but now they had time off, it was truly sinking in. The mechanic squirrel jumped onto the table and stood before Heine, tilting its head. The bereaved man started petting it.

"...I see..." Zala knew that feeling and shared his sentiment. And he also understood that Seren had wanted to comfort her grieving friend... and that a part of her must have felt guilty for having been unable to protect her friend's precious comrade... She understood that not everyone could be saved. It was obvious. But after all, fully accepting it when you saw a friend mourning was another thing...

"I know it's an insignificant loss for the army, but I still can't get over it... I'm pathetic, huh? We're soldiers. It's our job to obey orders and eliminate the enemy. During a battle, we can't look back to see if there are wounded people. We must have our eyes fixed ahead until the end of the battle. But... I can't get used to that feeling... Seren, you're not originally a soldier, and even now that you're wearing a uniform, you still won't bend to the military's ways, so you can still be soft-hearted... or maybe it's because you have the combat and tactical ability that makes naivety affordable? But for me... I know I shouldn't..."

"Why? Is it really a matter of military or ability? Before being a soldier, aren't you human? You're not a killing machine, so of course you'll feel sad. Certainly, if everyone could be emotionless, it wouldn't hurt this much, and less people would behave irrationally or be driven by hatred and revenge... But even if it's painful, I don't think you should relinquish your human heart or your right to think for yourself but treasure them instead. I believe your squad members really like you and feel comforted knowing their life had meaning for someone, that you at least would feel sad over their death. So if possible, I'd like you to stay as you are..." Seren smiled comfortingly.

"I see, so that's it..." Heine suddenly pulled her in a strong embrace, surprising her. Zala reacted with a start before repressing the urge to separate them as it would be strange to pull them apart in these circumstances. "While people usually consider that pain and naivety as a burden and a shackle, for you they're a source of pride, a conviction, an ideal to protect. That is your true strength... huh? But Athrun, wasn't it hard to be her childhood friend? Since she rushes head first against the flow, she must have worried and troubled you a lot, right?"

"You don't say..."

"Hey! Don't suddenly start talking over my head!" Canaver angrily and repeatedly hit Heine's arm. He freed her.

"About troublesome people, did you really reconcile with Shinn?" He still talked to Athrun over her head.

"... Well... kind of...?"

"Kind of? You... you're the older one among you!"

"I guess you're right..."

"We're from Orb, and he resents Orb, so it'll be hard to bridge the gap. But it looks like he respects strength, so maybe we just have to show our stuff?" The girl pondered.

Later, Seren and Athrun returned to the hotel and went to their respective rooms. Athrun was lying awake on his bed, his arms behind his head, musing. Everyone's convictions... Cagalli who hoped and desperately tried to protect the neutrality and ideals of her country, Shinn who believed people should fight when the time called for it or they'd be unable to protect themselves, Meer who had found a way to be useful to someone, Heine who intended to fulfil his duties as a soldier, Chairman Durandal who was trying to do something about the merchants of death, and Seren who was striving to cut the chain of hatred. Both she and Kira were lamenting that the same mistakes were being repeated over and over. Everyone had found their purpose. Everyone but him. What was he doing? And he fell asleep thinking about them, unaware that someone was sneaking into his room...

We still knew nothing as we vainly felt for nothingness. Not knowing how to even protect anything, the smallest of conflicts bind our hands and deceive the shape of our future. Rather than going on laughing without knowing anything, we want to learn. Even if we were to know sadness and futility all too well, we want to stay human.

Author's note: that's it for gundam seed this month. Next chapter will be: 'Phase-18: Divergence' will come out at a later time, probably in january or february. The next installment of the end-of-year mass release will be a Yu Yu Hakusho chapter.