Don't Own the DXD or whatever other nonsense I eventually add in this fic, Only The Oc
'thought'
"Speech"
"Tvs, Radios, and Text via book or newspaper... when those are around..."

I stare at the door of my family's home for a brief moment before sighing and closing my eyes.

Irina's back...

And there's no Kokabiel snooping around either.

A change.

I reach out, twisting the doorhandle as it quietly swings open.

I step inside, hands slipping into my pockets as I gently kick the door shut behind me.

"I'm back." I call out into the home. "Mainly because I saw three weird looking people in the doorbell camera. Sidenote. Weirdos. If you are here and have hurt my family, you're about to suffer a fate worse than death."

"Suzutsu!" My mother sounds scandalized as I step into the living room. "They are from the church!"

"Oh? Oh." I blandly hum.

"They're dressed like cultists." I frown. "How was I supposed to know that they were from the church."

"Suzutsu?" One of the figures whispers.

"Hm?" I hum, turning to face the three. Cloaked figures.

The leftmost one pulls back her hood revealing a purple eyed girl with light brown hair tied in long hatsune miku-like pigtails.

Spoiler

"Oh, Hey Irina. It's been a while."

She flinches. "You... You remember me?"

"Of course. Your family was religious, right, you had brown hair, purple eyes, your face hasn't changed much either." I list off as I take a seat beside my mother. "But really, can't you people wear like... normal clothes? Do you know how much you worried me?"

They didn't but they don't really need to know that.

The older woman bows her head slightly. "I apologize. It was not our intention to worry you."

"It's fine." I lazily dismiss, head propped up with a fist.

My mother stands. "Let me go make some tea!"

"So, Suzutsu... what have you been up to all this time?" Irina asks, absolutely jazzed to be meeting with me again after so long..

"School, mostly... Graduated a while back... I got a job as well." I admit.

I watch the older woman's eyes flick to the diploma framed somewhere behind me, her eyes narrowing slightly.

"A-Already?!" The girl gasps.

"I'm fairly smart." I shrug a small smile tugging at my lips. "What about you? What have you been doing all this time?"

"Ah, well... I've been studying to become a..." Irina rolls her hand slightly, trying to find a word that isn't exorcist'. "Preacher?"

"A preacher?"

"Sorry, it's been a while since I've spoken Japanese. I was looking for the right word." The girl states, trying to explain away her brief miss step.

I then shift languages. "Well, would it be better if I spoke in English?"

The girl flinches.

"Or Italian?" I shift again. "Or... german?"

I shift back to Japanese. "I'm going to be honest, I don't really know where you went after you disappeared because somebody refused to call."

She looks a little guilty, glancing away.

"Heck, I doubt Issei even remembers you... or, if he did, he thought you were a boy considering he always called you 'ren'." I let out a disappointed sigh.

"U-Uh... Speaking of Issei... where... is he? At school?" She questions.

"Hm?" I hum before waving her off. "Oh, no he's upstairs playing that new domain of magic game thing. He'll be down in about... thirty minutes or so."

"WHAT?!" The girl gasps. "He's playing on one of those sinful systems?!"

"Its just a video game Irina, calm down. Jeez." I roll my eyes.

"It- it- I just have a bad feeling about them!" She begins.

"I don't really see why you would." I point out. "You didn't have any issue with gameboys back when we were children."

"That is- that's different!"

"Is it? Is it really?" I question.

"O-Of course it is! Playing with the mind is dangerous! It's magic."

"..."

"It's like magic!" She exclaims a moment after realizing her critical error.

"I mean, don't people say 'any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic'? So I mean, you're sort of right. I'd imagine going back in time a few thousand years with a simple pistol would make you some sort of legendary figure like 'Princess of Japan, the slayer of Yamata No Orochi, capable of firing bolts of lightning from her fingertips and slaying men from a mile away'. You need to keep in mind back then Vikings thought that infusing bones into their swords during blacksmithing would make them 'enchanted' and what not... when in actuality, what they were doing was taking the carbon from bones and making a rudimentary form of steel."

"This is- I just have bad feelings about the creators, okay." The girl pouts.

"I've actually met the creator before."

"..."

"Huh?" The girl blinks.

"Oh yeah, I'm actually interning at Eden Interactive and helped create aspects of the Eden system!" I smile brightly. "They've got so much cool stuff back at the office. I've even made a few contributions of my own!"

I push a few buttons on my watch. "This right here is my creation, in fact!"

A large holographic screen appears above my wrist, showing a video of two swordsmen fighting with wooden swords, there are little white spheres across their bodies as they block parry and attack each other.

We fall into silence as I watch the video.

"You need to quit!" Irina whispers, only to be elbowed by the nun beside her, who thankfully has a working brain and realizes that I wouldn't necessarily be friendly enough with a person I hadn't seen in upwards of seven years to agree to quit the job I seem to love. Said nun gets her to quit before I say something in response that may hurt her feelings. Honestly, well played. I can respect that.

"Hm?" I hum, glancing back to her. "Sorry, I got distracted by the fighting. It's just so cool that we got to invite professionals like that to be scanned for our game! You can tell how much time and effort they put into learning... it's really incredible!"

Said sword fight probably looks relatively boring to the three exorcists as they are fighting completely and totally within human limits.

I close the window with a small nod. "Anyways, that has been a tremendous opportunity for me, and honestly, I'm a little glad that I accepted their recruitment offer!"

"So... what is your school life, like?" I question. "I'm curious how ah... biblical school... Works? Sunday school?"

"Suzutsu, you need to-" Irina tries again, only to be lightly elbowed again by the nun woman, who shakes her head slightly as Irina gives her a confused glance.

"Oh, my... schooling? Uh." The brown haired girl awkwardly begins. "It was... ah... absolutely wonderful!" The girl after a moment to collect her thoughts. "I've met so many good people who have tremendous faith in the lord! It makes me so happy."

"I'm glad you're happy." I nod. "Oh, and before I forget... when you meet Issei I would like you to temper your expectations."

"Pardon?" The girl blinks.

"This happened when I was at school but apparently one day there was this old pervert guy with an eyepatch and two pet ravens that was here that was proclaiming the- and I quote- 'the supple and glorious nature of jiggling breasts'."

"..."

"And thus, ever since that day, Issei has been an absolute degenerate pervert who spends time drilling holes into the girl's locker room walls and being a genuine menace to every female- excluding my girlfriend- in a five-mile radius." I sigh dramatically before tilting my head and tapping my chin. "He was actually quite polite around her. Not his usual degenerate self. I can respect that, at least."

"G-Girlfriend?!" Irina whispers.

"Hm?" I hum. "Why do you sound so dejected?"

"You said that you would marry me, Suzutsu." The girl pouts. "You're so mean!"

I raise a hand. "I'm going to stop you right there."

I point to the side of my head. "Eidetic and Photographic memory. I remember literally each and every waking moment of my life from birth till right now."

"W-What?" The nun seems genuinely surprised at this face.

"Yep. And I know that have literally never said anything about marriage- to you." I continue. "You might be confusing me with Issei here."

Irina frowns slightly, closing her eyes and pondering for a moment. "Then... hm... do you remember what happened march eighth nineteen ninety eight?"

I raise a finger, "What do you mean, by... 'remember'. Do you want me to just quote snippets from that day, or do you like... want me to just list the entire day?"

"..."

"I'll just start listing things that happened in your immediate vicinity." I nod slowly. "So. You immediately tackled Issei and myself the second we stepped outside, nearly knocking us over. While shouting 'Suzu, Isse'. Then after we greeted each other, you were all 'Let's go to the secret spot!' And after that we made our way to 'Fort Coolness'-"

The girl lets out a small squeak.

"Then, once there you were all 'The meeting of cool is now in seshon'. And yes, you did mispronounce Session, we started deliberating what we would play that day, then Issei was all 'Before that... did the grand snack general bring the stuff?' And then I pulled out a bunch of snacks from my backpack. You got orange, Issei got apple."

"I... I believe you." Irina relents with a long self-loathing sigh. "But... do... do you remember anything else about that day? What about in the afternoon?"

I open my mouth to reply only to pause, cupping my chin as I feign ignorance. "Hang on... that is... unusual..."

I sit there in silence for a long moment, eyes narrowing at the floor, flicking across its surface, an intense frown on my face.

"There was a rabid dog..." Irina quietly begins.

I snap my fingers. "Ah! That's right. A rabid dog, how the hell did I forget about that. Anyways, I led it away from Issei and you, then managed to lose it in the forest. After that, I ran back to you and we ran to your dad who said he called the animal control on it."

"Oh!" I blink as I look towards the two girls sitting beside Irina. "I apologize. I have been incredibly rude. I should have asked this Ages ago."

I stand up offering the nun and blue haired girl a hand. "My name is Suzutsu Hyoudou. It is good to meet you, what are your names? I'm sorry for ignoring you this entire time."

"I am Griselda Quarta, and this is my ward, Xenovia Quarta." The woman begins, gesturing to the girl who still has her hood up.

"Mn." Xenovia grunts as I shake their hands.

"It is pleasant to meet the both of you. How exactly did you meet Irina?"

"Oh, well, Irina is studying under me." The woman explains. "And Xenovia is also doing the same."

"I see... that must be quite interesting." I hum mutely. "So, why have you come back after so long?"

"That is none of your business." Xenovia frowns.

"Rude." I frown before relenting with a shrug. "But true, I guess."

"Xenovia! Be nice!" The nun chastises with a frown.

"We're here to make sure the church is back up and running!" Irina beams.

There's a small thud from upstairs, causing all of our eyes to flick towards the ceiling.

"I guess Issei is up. But like I said... please temper your expectations." I state, glancing towards the stairs.

"Poor lost lamb." Irina sobs. "To be led astray... you have my word that I will do my best to fix him."

"Please do. like, honestly, you making him a normal functioning human being would be a net positive for all of our lives." I roll my eyes.

Issei's footsteps thud down the stairs, he comes around the corner, stretching his arms above his head, letting out a small yawn.

"huh?" He tiredly mutters, glancing over. "BOOBS?!"

Irina recoils with a small gurgle, possibly assuming I was just joking.

This is going to be quite painful.

I open the door to allow the three exorcists outside of my family's home.

"Bye, Mrs Hyoudou, Issei." Irina waves as she walks past. "Bye Suzutsu!"

"Goodbye Irina. Tell me, do you remember the way to the old church? It has been quite a while."

"I..." She begins quietly. "I remember it's on the outskirts?"

"..."

"Mom, I'm going to lead Irina and the others to the church." I call out. "Then I'll probably go back to the rental place."

"Alright! Be safe!" The woman calls out as I close the door.

"Come on, I can show you the way." I gesture for them to follow me.

My eyes stray down to my watch as I get a message.

Significant Annoyance: "Oi. There was a group staying at the church. Bossman said that he sent them notice to leave, but If they're still there, he told you to step in and put them in their place so they don't raise tensions."

I send her a simple thumbs up emoji.

Well, that's annoying. Looks like I'll be forced to reveal myself sooner than I had hoped.

I begin walking in the vague direction of the church with a small pep in my step. "I don't know if you've really walked around the town much since you got here, but a lot has changed. You know that candy store we really enjoyed... it's gone."

"What?! What happened to Mrs... uh..."

"Tanaka." I cut in. "Old age, sadly."

"That's horrible!" She gasps.

A long sigh leaves my lips. "A real shame, honestly. I miss her. She was so nice."

A brief silence passes over us as I eventually begin speaking again. "Then the park's been remodeled almost completely... oh, you know that really important girl only high school? Kuoh Academy?"

"I ah... don't remember?"

"Ah. Right. We were eight years old. You likely didn't even consider high school a factor just like I didn't." I nod slowly. "Anyways, that school became co-ed four years ago. Then that movie theatre we frequented went out of business, as did the arcade."

"The movie theatre AND the arcade?! Is there even anything fun to do here anymore?" Irina gasps.

"Well, a new movie theatre sprung up, as did a new arcade... a lot of the family run restaurants went out of business as well, but more have taken their place. Oh! I remember that you used to like Sato's sushi place. They're still open." I continue as we walk the winding roads of Kuoh town. "There's also an Eden Device rental store opening up pretty soon."

"Ah! Wait. Coupons!" I smile brightly as I turn reaching into my pocket and pulling out a folded pamphlet that reads 'Grand Opening 50% off first rental of up to an hour.' Then there's a little barcode on it.

I hand it to Irina who slowly looks over it, a frown on her face.

"Why do you... have this?"

"Oh. I work there." I reply casually.

"You need-" Irina begins, only to have Griselda to place her hand on her shoulder and shake her head again, causing Irina to wilt slightly.

"Let's see here..." I mutter under my breath. "Your old family home got remodeled."

"I saw that." Irina sighs. "Was there a reason?"

"Not that I can think of the new residents just wanted it in a new color."

I eventually lead them up a long winding path towards the outskirts of Kuoh.

"Yeesh." I mutter gazing around suspisciously. "I never understood why the church was built so far outside of Kuoh. This is sort of creepy. Like... if I were a serial killer,this is where I'd hide the bodies... no offense."

"None taken." Irina smiles. "I always wondered why it was built out here... honestly, that's probably why not many people went to it. It was too much of a hike. But. A place of the lord should not be allowed to fall into such disrepair; thus, I will make it my mission to fix it up!"

"Mr Hyoudou... I believe we can take it from here." The nun abruptly cuts in as the church comes into view.

"Hm?" I hum.

"It would probably be best if you leave."

Her last word seems to hold weight, but what once might have hooked its way into my brain now washes over my head like a gentle breeze.

"Oh. You're worried about the current tenants?" I question.

"W-What?" The nun blinks as the two younger girl shoot me a confused look.

There's a flash of movement through the trees.

"SUZUTSU LOOK OUT!"

A gun is pressed against my head as a white haired man looms behind me.

"Well well! If it isn't the shitty boring bitches of the church!" He cackles. "Paahahah what are you doing here?! This is our turf. Perhaps I need to teach those tight virgin cunts a lesson-"

I close my eyes and take a deep breath, then exhale.

I whirl around, elbow smashing into the side of the gun.

It goes off, harmlessly sending a blast of light towards the side.

I slam a punch into his ribs bending him over and twisting the gun out of his grasp with my other hand.

With a series of quick jabs and grabs, I dislocate his shoulder and bend his elbow backwards.

There's a brief stunned silence from all parties, but eventually it is broken by the screaming of one Freed Sellzen as he ignites a light sword and swings it at me. "YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT! I'LL FUCKING END YOU-"

Another series of quick jabs and his other arm is broken, shoulder dislocated and throat punched.

He lands roughly in the dirt, flat on his back in a haze of pain.

"Wh-What... what the hell?!" Irina whispers. "Y-You're supernatural?!"

"Yep. I unlocked my sacred gear at one month old, after all. I've been able to balance breaker since age six... oh, and I totally killed that one horse youkai that tried to eat me."

"He... He's part of the Grigori!" Xenovia accuses pointing at my back with a finger.

"Oh wow." I note as I take a single step forwards, stepping onto Freed's chest and pivoting as I turn to face the three church exorcists, now on the other side of Freed. "Pretty quick on the uptake there. Yes. I am. Allow me to properly introduce myself."

"My name is Suzutsu Hyoudou. The record holder for the youngest sacred gear wielder, ultimate class mage, CEO of Eden Interactive, and probably one of the most influential people within the Grigori second only to Azazel himself."

Xenovia draws a light sword and points it menacingly at me.

"Xenovia! What are you doing?!" The brown haired girl shrieks.

"He's an enemy."

"My dear." I hum with a bright smile. "If I wanted to hurt you..."

I unleash my magical aura, streams of magical power of numerous hues and colors, the ground vibrates, small spires of earth rising from the ground in random locations as trees fall. "don't you think I would have done so already?"

The aura is snuffed out as with a wave of my hand, an armored figure made of earth and stone rises from the ground, It picks up the battered and broken exorcist as I turn away. The doors of the church are hurled off their hinges as three figures rush out with a flap of their jet black wings.
Spears of light form in their hands as they rear their arms back to hurl their weapons-.

"Stop."

They freeze in place as I slowly rise off the ground, my pupils turning into a deep ethereal blue with white lines throughout, the world around me is practically pulled back and left with a series of blueprints.

"Now." I state, ten large blue holographic-like wings on my back.

Blueprints created by my sacred gear can only apply physical force to myself after I've made them.

A staircase will only be climbable by me, a knife will only cut me.

Thus, these wings can only allow me to fly.

"It appears there is a slight clerical error on our part." I begin as I push a few buttons on my wristwatch, creating a large screen that floats above me.

There's a dull droning ringing sound, the ringtone of a cellular device.

It rings twice before the person I am calling picks up.

"Yo. What is it?"

Azazel himself.

"I've called to clear up a few things." I begin slowly. "When exactly did you send a message to tell the agents in Kuoh to leave?"

"Since you spoke about wanting to go back there."

"So... about two weeks? Is our network truly so shitty that our people aren't getting notified even after two weeks?"

He seems to look up. "Wait... are they still there?! They should have left that place more than a month ago after I finished negotiating the return of the church to heaven."

"It appears we've got a little rat in our group. Either someone on my end not sending orders or a bunch of replicable idiots who are ignoring said orders."

"How many agents are supposed to be here?"

"If you mean not including you and Mittelt? Three."

"..."

"There are three angels here... and fifty six human exorcists."

"FIFTY-"

He sharply inhales then exhales.

"Oh, and one of the geniuses, Freed Sellzen, immediately tried to blow my head off as I was walking up with the church exorcists."

"Hah." The governor general of the fallen angels sighs. "Oh boy what a fucking mess. There's no reason for that savage animal to be there. You killed him?"

"Nope. But I'm honestly looking for an excuse to."

"Damn." He whispers under his breath his focus changing. "What do you three have to say for yourselves?"

"..."

"..."

"Nothing?"

"Oh, my bad." I cut in. "You may speak."

"L-Lord Azazel." Raynare stutters "W-We didn't get any form of order from you for the past three weeks. A-and the last one was to be on standby for further orders."

"Oh. Also, I forgot to mention." I begin as I gaze past the three, peeling back walls and floors, turning it into a see-through mesh through my sacred gear as I gaze into the basement. "It looks like they've got the sacred gear extractor."

"WHAT?!" Azazel snarls.

He looks genuinely infuriated now.

"Brat. Arrest them. Oh. And Sellzen is now officially declared a stray exorcist. Do with that information as you-"

*Crack*

"-Was that his neck?"

"He's the type of guy to go after people I care about without care of how powerful I am, so yes, that was his neck. Also, I just didn't like the murderous, psychopathic rapist that much and was looking for an excuse." I confirm. "I'll be opening a portal into holding cell eight in about... five minutes. Tell Penemue so she doesn't have an aneurism or throw any light spears at me after thinking it's some sort of escape attempt."

"Don't worry. I've already sent her a message. She is on her way. After that is finished. I want you to destroy the extractor. It was already scheduled to be destroyed, and honestly, by this point it should have. But it appears someone rather high up in the Grigori is messing around again."

"I'll break it down and leave the pieces in your office, sound good?"

"Whatever. Toss it in a black hole for all I care."

"Cool. Cool." I reply simply as the call ends.

"You three. You are coming with me." I begin. "it's likely that you truly had no real idea what you were doing here, having your orders manipulated and all, but one of you should have perhaps returned to the Grigori in order to clarify once you realized that your orders have been getting... suspicious. Anyways. if you comply, it's likely you'll all be let off with just a slap on the wrist."

I drop to the ground, the three fallen following shortly after me.

The earthen golem slowly walks forwards carrying the deceased body of Freed over his shoulder as I turn to the church.

"Just a moment and I will be out of your hair. I have some things to clean up."

Heyo... well, now, this is something unusual! an update skipping over my waiting list! huh!

I was keeping this for a rainy day, just in case I hit a funk, but I currently have like 2 Bard of the Wild chapters that I haven't put on yet, So, I mean, i'm good for some time even if I do get in a depressed funk.