Sorry this took so long to post. I got it posted into AO3, but I couldn't get it on FFN until now.
Well, better late than never.
Ford found himself in a grassy field. Around him, he could see a swingset, a broken sailboat, and his old portal.
Before he could ask himself how he got here, the grass started to bend down and take the shape of a one-eyed triangle. A familiar laugh rang throughout the environment.
"I know that laugh," Ford said aloud. "Show yourself!"
Bill Cipher himself appeared in front of Ford. He multiplied himself until he was completely surrounding Ford.
"Well, well, well!" he laughed. "Aren't you a sight for one sore eye? Stanford Filbrick Pines."
"What do you want from me, Bill Cipher?" Ford asked.
"Oh, quit playing dumb, IQ. You think shutting down that portal will stop me? I've been making deals and chatting with old friends, preparing for the big day. You may think that rift is safe, but you'll slip up, and when you do…"
Bill summoned a replica of the contained rift and threw it to the ground. The rift spread and set fire to everything in the area.
"Get out of here!" Ford demanded. "You have no dominion in our world!"
"Maybe not now," Bill replied. "But things change, Stanford Pines. Things change."
Bill flew through the rift.
Ford bolted awake, panting and sweating.
I have to warn them, he thought. He's coming.
Play Gravity Falls Intro Music
A bus stops in the small town of Gravity Falls. Dipper and Mabel get off the bus. In front of them is the town's star attraction, The Mystery Shack. Their great-uncle, Stan, invites them inside.
The twins look around the shack. They're both curious about everything.
Later, the Pines investigate a strange footprint with four toes instead of five. None of them realize they're standing in a much larger footprint.
DIPPER
Dipper looks around a cave holding a candle for light. He comes across a strange skeleton that scares him. He drops his candle, getting rid of his only source of light.
MABEL
Mabel stands in a room wearing a purple sweater with stars, her name, and a rainbow. She plugs an outlet into her sweater, causing it to glow.
STAN
Stan tells the twins, Wendy, and Soos a scary story. Soos and the twins are terrified while Wendy is completely unfazed. However, none of them notice the scary creature behind them.
WENDY
Wendy sits in front of the cash register, minding her own business. She doesn't notice the nearby jar of eyeballs turning to face her.
SOOS
Soos spins around the living room wearing multiple jewels on his clothes. Mabel shines a flashlight, and the light reflects off of the jewels creating a beautiful lightshow.
Dipper and Mabel lay in their room. Mabel reads a girl magazine while laying on the floor. Dipper reads a journal while laying on his bed. After a second, everyone and everything begins to float off the ground. Dipper is the only one who notices something off.
End Intro
One Cruel Summer
Chapter 28
The Last Mabelcorn
Dipper and Mabel checked the closet for board games. They came across an interesting jungle-themed game.
"'Jumanji'," Dipper read. "'A game for those who seek to find a way to leave their world behind'."
"Well, I guess I know what we're doing today," said Mabel.
"Yeah," Dipper added. "Should take up the next twenty minutes or so."
"Family meeting!" Ford called.
Outside, Stan was giving barrels full of pug puppies to a gangster.
"Alright, Santiago," he said. "You have twenty-four hours to get these pugs across the border."
"Family meeting! Family meeting!" came Ford's voice.
Stan could tell Santiago was curious.
"¡No te preocupes!" he yelled. "Vamos, vamos!"
Santiago finished loading his truck.
Dipper and Mabel entered the dining room. They could see Ford setting a bunch of scrolls on the table.
"Ooh, spells and potions," Mabel assumed. "Are you going to tell us we're finally of age to go to wizard school? Is there an owl in this bag?"
"No!" Ford snatched the bag before Mabel could look in it. "If there was an owl in there it'd be dead by now."
That saddened Mabel.
"Now tell me, children," Ford went on. "Do either of you recognize this symbol?"
He took out a drawing of Bill Cipher.
Dipper gasped. "Bill."
"You know him?" Ford asked, intrigued.
"'Know him'? He's been terrorizing us all summer! I have so many questions and theories!"
"Dipper's been paranoid ever since Bill used him as a living sock puppet," Mabel teased.
Dipper elbowed Mabel before going back to Ford. "The important thing is, we defeated him, twice."
"Once with kittens, and the other time with tickles."
"That was a lot more heroic than it sounds."
"The fact that you defeated Bill is gravely serious," Ford said.
"So, how do you know Bill?" Dipper asked.
"I've encountered many dark beings in my time, Dipper. All that matters is he's getting stronger, and if he pulls off his plans, no one is safe. Fortunately, there should be a way to shield us from his mental tricks. There might be a way to Bill-proof the shack." Ford brought out a map of the place to showcase his plan. "All I gotta do is sprinkle some moonstones here, sprinkle some mercury here, and… I'm always forgetting the last ingredient."
He skimmed through the first journal until he found what he was looking for.
"Ugh, unicorn hair," he groaned.
"That's not, like, rare, is it?" Dipper asked.
"It's hopeless. Unicorns live deep within an enchanted glade, and their hairs can only be obtained by someone pure of heart who goes on an epic quest to find them. The last time I tried to get unicorn hair, they banned me, and anyone male, from their glades."
Mabel squealed in excitement. "Grunkle Ford, can I please go on this quest? I am literally obsessed with unicorns. My first word was unicorn. I made my own unicorn by taping a traffic cone to a horse's head. Are you even looking at the sweater I'm wearing right now?! Not to mention I'm the most pure-of-heart person in this room."
Dipper snickered. "That's debatable."
"Can I please go on this mission?" Mabel continued pleading, lifting up her sleeve. "I'll give you my blood!"
"Very well," Ford relented. "But it won't be easy. Take this, and this." Ford handed Mabel his journal and a crossbow. "I haven't been in this dimension in a while. It's okay to give children weapons, right?"
Dipper made a so-so gesture.
That's when Mabel accidentally fired the crossbow. It flew out the window and hit something. The Pines could hear a car alarm going off.
"It's the cops!" came Stan's voice. "Quick! Gun it!"
They then heard the sound of a car driving away and puppies barking.
Mabel brushed it off and called her friends on the phone. "Evan, Candy, Grenda, Wendy, clear the afternoon!"
"So, what are the odds she gets the hair?" Dipper asked.
"Unlikely," Ford replied. "I've dealt with unicorns before, and if I had to describe them with one word, it would be, 'frustrating'."
"So what will we do about Bill?"
"Come with me."
Ford led Dipper into another part of the basement. It was a room filled with books, origami, and so much more.
"Welcome to my private study," Ford showcased. "A place where I keep my most ancient and secret knowledge. Even Stan doesn't know about this place."
Dipper noticed something covered in a tarp. He got curious and tried to remove it.
"Dipper, come on!" Ford called, snapping Dipper out of it. "If we can't Bill-proof the shack, we're gonna have to do the next best thing. We're gonna have to Bill-proof our minds."
Ford showed Dipper a rusty, metal helmet. Dipper felt a bit of unease.
Mabel and the girls, plus Evan, were walking through the woods.
"It's nice to finally go on a mission," Mabel admitted. "Just us gals."
Evan cleared his throat.
Mabel blushed in embarrassment. "Sorry, us gals and ONE guy."
"I can't wait to meet, and hopefully pet a unicorn," Grenda said excitedly.
"I hear if you lick a unicorn's neck, it tastes like your most favorite flavor in the world," Candy mentioned.
"Candy, I will make sure you lick that neck, because I care about my friends," said Mabel.
"Honestly, I stopped believing in unicorns when I was, like, five," Wendy said, chopping a branch with her ax. "I'm just coming along to keep you kids from walking into a bear trap."
Mabel saw something in front of the group.
"Stop!" she shouted.
Everyone stopped. In front of them was what looked like a stonehenge.
"This is the magic part of the forest," Mabel said as she read the journal. "Let's see. The gnome tavern is here, the fairy nail salon is there, but it says to summon a unicorn, one must bellow an ancient chant droned only by the deepest-voiced Druids of old."
"I got this," Grenda said as she took the journal.
She started to recite the incantation.
"Five bucks says it doesn't work," Wendy smiled.
"I'm willing to take that bet," said Mabel.
Once Grenda was done reciting the incantation, the ground started to shake. Everyone backed away as something emerged from the ground.
In front of them was a big golden gate with pink jewels in the middle.
"Did I do something wrong?" she asked.
Mabel put her hand on the gate. It swung open.
Evan tried to walk through. For whatever reason, he bounced back.
"What the…?" he reacted.
"Hold on, let me try," said Grenda.
When she tried to enter, she also bounced back.
"I guess neither of us are allowed in here," Evan remarked.
"Sorry, guys," Mabel apologized. "We'll be out before you know it."
With that, Mabel, Candy, and Wendy went through the gate.
They found themselves in a colorful landscape. There were rainbows, butterflies, and fauna everywhere, and there was even a small waterfall. In the center was a white unicorn with a rainbow mane.
Mabel gasped excitedly. "The paintings airbrushed on the sides of vans were true!"
The unicorn waved its mane and made a beautiful neigh.
"No way!" Wendy said in disbelief.
Mabel held out her hand, demanding for the money. Wendy sighed and reluctantly gave her the five dollars.
"Hark, visitors to my realm of enchantment!" the unicorn said.
Everyone gasped. A butterfly flew into Wendy's mouth, choking her for a second. She managed to cough it out.
"Omigosh omigosh omigosh!" Mabel squealed. "What's your name?"
"I am Celestabelle, last of my kind," the unicorn replied. "Come in, come in. Just take off your shoes."
Mabel and Candy took off their shoes and walked towards Celestabelle.
Wendy tried to join them, but Celestabelle stopped her.
"Ah-ah-ah, I'm talking to all of you," she said.
Wendy begrudgingly took off her boots.
"Celestabelle, we've traveled far and wide," Mabel said.
"About an hour," Wendy interjected.
"On a mission to protect our families with your hair," Mabel finished.
This is your chance, Candy, Candy thought to herself. Lick the neck.
Before Candy could lick Celestabelle's neck, though, Celestabelle moved her head up.
"Very well, then," she said. "To receive a lock of my enchanted hair, step forth, girl of pure, perfect heart."
Mabel got excited and entered the spotlight.
"Presenting… Mabel!" she shouted.
"What?" Celestabelle reacted like she just witnessed murder. "A unicorn can see deep inside your heart, child, and you have done wrong. Wrong, I say!"
Mabel realized Celestabelle had a point. "I guess I have made fun of Dipper a lot, and I did shatter a window with a crossbow."
Rainbow tears formed around Celestabelle's eyes. "Your bad deeds make me cry."
The tear landed on a flower, turning it to ash.
Mabel jumped back, screaming.
"Come back when you're pure of heart!" Celestabelle said. "Exit is that way."
Everyone walked out.
"Shoes, shoes, take your shoes," Celestabelle demanded. "This isn't some… shoe store!"
Evan was just standing in a corner waiting for the girls to come out. He turned to see how Grenda was doing. She seemed troubled.
"Grenda, is something wrong?" he asked.
Grenda jumped, as if she just noticed Evan was there. "Uh, I'm fine!"
Evan could tell that Grenda, in fact, wasn't fine, but he knew it was best to leave her alone.
That's when the rest of the gate opened and the rest of the girls came out.
"Hey," Evan said. "Did you get the hair?"
"No," Mabel sighed. "The unicorn, Celestabelle, thinks I'm not pure of heart."
"What?" Grenda reacted. "Whoever believes that is totally crazy!"
"Yeah," Wendy added. "I wouldn't trust a horse that wears makeup."
"No, she's right," Mabel replied. "I used to be one of the sweetest people I knew, but lately I've been lacking in the goodness department. Well, today, we're gonna fix that. From this moment forth, I'll do so many good deeds that I'll be the sweetest girl in all of Gravity Falls!"
She punched the air as she finished that statement. She accidentally punched a bird out of its flight.
"That bird is fine," she tried to assure herself.
Dipper sat on a stool as Ford put the helmet on him.
"So, what is Bill exactly?" asked Dipper.
"No one knows for sure," Ford replied. "Accounts differ of his true motivations and origins. I know he's older than our galaxy and far more twisted. Not a physical form, he can only project himself into our thoughts through the mindscape. That's why he wants this." He showed the rift. "While I dismantled the portal, Bill still has a way into our reality. To get his hands on this rift, he'll trick or possess anyone."
"So how do we keep Bill out of our heads?"
"There are multiple ways. I personally had a metal plate installed in my head."
To prove his point, Ford hit himself in the head. It made a metal clank.
"But this machine is safer," he went on. "It will scan your mind, bio-electrically encrypting your thoughts so Bill can't read them. Now say hello to your thoughts."
Many of Dipper's thoughts appeared on screen.
I can't believe I'm with the author.
Is my fly down?
Dancing queen, young and sweet.
Pacifica's hot, but I just got over Wendy. Should I really be thinking about this now?
"You might want to ignore that last one," Dipper said, blushing. "By the way, you never told me about your history with Bill."
"Dipper, do you trust me?" Ford asked.
"Yes, but…"
"Then you'll trust this is not important. Now focus. It's time to strengthen your mind."
"Alright, Mabel," Mabel said to herself. "It's time to strengthen your heart."
The first thing Mabel did was get some snails off the sidewalk and onto some plants.
Next, the girls planted a tree.
Then, Mabel donated a good chunk of her blood to save lives. She passed out for a good half-hour, but it was worth it.
After that, she helped some ducks cross the road.
Finally, she gave a large tip to Lazy Susan.
Mabel crossed each of those things off of her list.
"Boom!" she cheered. "When that unicorn scans my heart, she's gonna think I'm 100%, bona fide…"
"Not pure of heart," Celestabelle said.
"Boo-ya!" Mabel cheered, thinking Celestabelle said what she wanted her to say. It only took a second to realize she said the opposite. "Wait, what?"
"How is that even possible?" Wendy asked. "Mabel's a straight-up saint, you judgmental hoof bag!"
Mabel got on her knees and begged, "Please, tell me what I'm doing wrong!"
"Doing good things to make yourself look better isn't good at all," said Celestabelle. "Also, you're crushing ten dandelions right now. Those are, like, children's dreams."
Mabel realized Celestabelle was right and stood up in fear.
"I'm sorry, Mabel," Celestabelle went on. "It's not my fault you're a bad person."
The moment she heard that, Mabel backed away. A horrible memory repeated in her head over and over.
"I'm sorry, Mabel. It's not my fault you're a bad person."
Mabel's lips started to tremble. Tears formed around her eyes.
Wendy noticed this. "Mabel…"
Mabel ran off.
"Mabel, wait!" Wendy shouted, only to be ignored.
Evan was once again sitting outside, waiting for the girls to come out.
That's when he heard someone crying. He turned and saw Grenda was curled in a ball, sobbing.
"Grenda, are you sure you're alright?" asked Evan.
"Yes!" Grenda snapped, trying and failing to wipe her eyes.
At this point, Evan knew Grenda was lying. As much as he didn't want to pry, he knew that he couldn't just sit there either.
"Grenda, I can tell you're lying," he said calmly, carefully picking each word. "Is this about how they won't let us in there?"
Grenda finally wiped the tears away. "Yes. I was hoping I'd be over it by now, but I guess I was wrong."
Evan instantly knew what Grenda was referring to. "Grenda… I get it."
"No, Evan! You don't! You don't know what it's like to go through the things that I have!"
Evan sighed. "You're right. I don't know what it's like, but I do understand how you feel. I don't know what to say other than you're awesome, Grenda. You're one of the best girls I've ever known, and if some magic door can't see that, well, then it's delusional."
Grenda, still a little teary-eyed, hugged Evan. He gladly returned it.
That's when Mabel ran out of the glade. Wendy and Candy were running after her. Not knowing what was happening, Evan and Grenda followed.
Mabel laid on the ground and curled herself into a ball. Everyone cautiously approached her.
"Come on, Mabel," said Wendy. "Don't beat yourself up over this."
"Let's forget about the hair," Candy suggested.
"This isn't about the hair, guys," said Mabel. "It's about me. Being kind is who I am. If I'm not a good person, then who am I? I'm not leaving until I find a good deed that makes me worthy."
"Mabel…" Evan tried to say.
"Just leave me be!"
Mabel started writing on her notepad.
"Pss," Wendy whispered to the others.
She led them away so she could talk to them privately.
"Girls, if you ask me, this whole thing is complete bullshit," she said. "Mabel's, like, the best person I've ever met. We tried getting that hair the 'good' way. Now it's time we try it my way."
"You mean, like, sabotage?" Grenda asked nervously.
"Mabel wouldn't like that," said Candy.
"Mabel doesn't need to know," Wendy argued. "Look. It's time we stop trying to be 'perfect' and be who we really are! We're humans! We're wild beasts! We take what we want, when we want it!"
Grenda bashed her head on a rock, breaking it. The others glared at her.
"Alright, here's what we're gonna do," Wendy said.
The four huddled together to form a plan.
The four went to the gnome tavern.
"We're looking for someone to take down a unicorn," Wendy said. "No tricks or lies!"
Candy smashed a bottle to prove they were being serious. "We are humans! We take what we want!"
"Fairy dust," said one of the gnomes.
The group saw one gnome in particular, a shady one with a messy beard and dusty clothing, playing the knife game with an acorn.
"A whole magic bag's enough to put a unicorn out cold," he explained. "But if I do you a favor, you'll have to do something for me."
"Just spill it!" Grenda demanded, slamming her fist against the table.
"Butterfly trafficking is illegal in this part of the forest, but I like butterflies. They tickle my face and let me laugh. Bring me a bag of butterflies and we'll have a deal."
It didn't take too long for the gang to find enough butterflies to meet this dealer's liking. He took the butterflies and gave the group two bags of fairy dust.
"Where do you get this stuff?" asked Grenda.
"Everybody likes sausage, but nobody likes how it's made," the gnome replied.
"You disgust me."
"You get your poison, I got mine. We made a deal."
"Well, the deal is off!"
A bunch of gnome cops surrounded the dealer and took him away.
"No, these butterflies aren't mine!" he shouted. "I was framed!"
"Tell it to the adorable owl we dressed as a judge," one of the cops retorted before turning to Grenda. "My cut?"
Grenda gave the cop one of the sacks of fairy dust.
Wendy and Candy snuck back into the unicorn glade. They quickly put Celstabelle to sleep with the fairy dust.
Candy gave Wendy a pair of scissors.
Mabel headed back to the gland.
"Guys!" she shouted excitedly. "I finally figured out…"
When she looked up from her notepad, she saw Evan and Grenda were standing in front of the gate like they were guarding it.
"What are you doing?" she asked suspiciously.
"Nothing," Evan lied, sweating. "We aren't allowed in here, remember?"
"Yeah, but why are you standing in front of the gate like that?"
"We… uh…" Evan realized he couldn't come up with a good lie.
Mabel was able to figure out what they were hiding. "Back away, both of you."
Wendy was about to cut Celstabelle's hair off when Mabel came in.
"Wait, stop!" she shouted.
"Shh," Wendy shushed. "You'll wake her up."
Mabel snatched the scissors. "But this is wrong!"
"But protecting the shack is good!"
Celestabelle started to wake up. Mabel tried to hide the scissors, but it was too late. Celestabelle saw her.
"What?" she reacted. "Doth mine eyes deceive me? You shall never be pure of heart!"
"No, you don't understand!" Mabel tried to defend herself. "It's not what it looks like!"
"Whoa, whoa, you've gotta be kidding me," said a voice.
Everyone turned and saw two more unicorns entering the scene. One was red with a purple mane, and the other was teal with a green mane.
"Yo, Celestabelle, are you seriously pulling this 'pure of heart' scam again?" asked the teal one.
"That is messed up," said the red one.
All the girls were shocked by that statement.
"What? Scam?" Mabel asked.
"Kids, unicorns can't see into your heart," the red unicorn explained. "All our dumb horns can do is glow, make fake rainbows, and play rave music."
"Yeah," the teal one added. "The whole 'pure of heart' racket was just a scam we used to get people to leave us alone."
"Guys, shut up!" Celestabelle yelled.
Mabel's shock quickly turned to fury. She tore her notepad in half.
"All this time, I thought I was a bad person," she said. "But you're even worse!"
She tore the unicorn off of her sweater.
"Fine, we're jerks!" Celestabelle admitted. "We have more hair than we know what to deal with, and we keep it to ourselves just to tick people off! What are you gonna do about it?"
Mabel punched Celestabelle in the nose, making her nose bleed.
"Woo! Go Mabel!" Wendy cheered.
"Oh, you wanna play dirty?" Celestabelle asked. "Fine! Let's play dirty!"
Mabel and Celestabelle charged towards each other, while everyone else just watched.
The machine was scanning Dipper's mind. It was only 15% complete.
"Ugh, this is taking forever," he groaned. He noticed that Ford was asleep on the desk. "Why does he need to be so mysterious about Bill? I can handle the truth."
I wonder what Grunkle Ford is thinking, said his voice on the computer. Use the machine. It'll show his thoughts.
"I shouldn't."
He won't know. The more we know about Bill, the more we can help.
"Man, I am really good at rationalizing."
Yes you are.
Dipper took off the helmet and put it on Ford.
The screen showed Bill front and center. There was blue fire surrounding him. He was laughing his maniacal laugh.
The screen then showed Ford struggling to sleep.
"Where are these ideas coming from?" came Fiddleford's voice. "Who are you working with?"
The screen then showed Ford writing the line, 'Trust No One', in his journal.
"My brother is a dangerous know-it-all!" said Stan's voice.
The screen then showed a younger Ford with Bill.
"Then it's a deal," he said. "From now until the end of time."
"Just let me into your mind, Stanford," said Bill.
"Please, just call me a friend."
The two shook hands.
The screen then showed Ford's eyes glowing a bright yellow, while he laughed in Bill's voice.
Dipper started to back away in fear.
"You shouldn't have done that, Dipper," came Ford's voice.
Dipper turned around to see Ford standing right behind him. The glare of the light was keeping him from seeing Ford's eye through his glasses.
Ford tossed the helmet to the ground. It hit a tarp, making it come down. Behind it were multiple pictures of Bill.
This just reinforced Dipper's fears. He backed away from Ford.
"Why were you shaking hands with Bill?" he asked. "You said Bill would possess anyone to get his hands on this."
Dipper grabbed the rift, and just barely avoided dropping it.
"Hand me the rift, now!" Ford demanded.
"Why were you really scanning my thoughts?" Dipper asked. "Are you Bill right now?"
"Just calm down, p…"
"'Pine Tree'?! Is that what you were gonna call me?!"
"I was gonna say please!"
"Grunkle Ford told me to protect this rift at all costs! Don't come any closer!"
Dipper reached his arm out and formed a light orb. The light covered the entire room.
When Dipper opened his eyes, he saw Ford was blinded. He tried to make a run for it.
Unfortunately, Ford recovered and grabbed Dipper by the collar.
"Let go of me!" Dipper demanded.
"Calm down," Ford said. "Look into my eye. It's me."
Dipper saw that Ford's eye was completely normal.
Dipper sighed with relief. "I'm sorry."
"It's okay," Ford assured. "Anyway, did you make that light?"
"Uh, yeah."
"That's awesome. I can do that too."
Ford created his own, smaller, ball of light.
"Dipper, I was a fool to try and hide all of this," he admitted. "The reason why I've been trying to prepare you for Bill's tricks was because he tricked me. It's the biggest regret of my life. Bill wasn't always my enemy, Dipper. I used to think he was my friend, long, long ago."
Flashback
Ford hit a roadblock during his investigation of Gravity Falls until he found some mysterious writing in a cave. They were ancient incantations about a being with answers. It warned him not to read them, but he was desperate. He read the incantation aloud, but nothing happened…
Until later that afternoon. He was hit with the most peculiar dream.
He found himself floating in a weird void. All of his research, his journals, his notes, everything, was floating around him. Above him was a small, floating, one-eyed triangle.
"Hiya, smart guy," he greeted.
Ford jumped back in fear.
"Don't have a heart attack," the triangle teased. "You're not 92 yet."
"Who are you?" Ford asked.
"The name's Bill, and you're Stanford Pines, but I'm getting ahead of ourselves. Let's relax. Care for a game of interdimensional chess? Have a cup of tea."
Bill summoned a chair, a chess board, and a cup full of tea.
As they played, Bill said he was a muse, who chose one brilliant mind every century to inspire.
The fool Ford was, falling for Bill's flattery and games.
Bill became Ford's assistant. He was free to move in and out of his mind as he pleased. They were partners.
Sure, there were some strange occurrences.
Bill left Ford a gift for his birthday one year. That gift was a bunch of dead rats spelling his name.
One night in Ford's dreams, he and Bill got drunk and did karaoke together.
But the biggest surprise was when Ford awakened strange powers.
High-jumping.
Light-casting.
Ghost-sensing.
When Bill said Ford could use his research to harness his power and build a gateway to other worlds, he trusted him. He said this was the way genius happened. Help from a friend.
It seemed Ford was on the verge of his greatest achievement until Fiddleford got a glimpse of Bill's true plans.
The next time Ford saw Bill in his dreams, he was angry.
"Bill, you lied to me!" he shouted. "Where does that portal really lead?"
"Looks like Mr. Brainiac finally got smart," Bill teased. "Let's just say that when that portal finishes charging up, your dimension's gonna learn how to party. Right guys?"
Bill gestured to the shadowy monsters behind him. They all laughed.
"I won't let that happen!" Ford yelled. "I'll shut it down!"
"A deal's a deal, Sixer," Bill replied. "You can't stop the bridge between our worlds from coming, but it'll be cute to see you try, cute even."
When Ford woke up. He knew what he had to do.
Ford quickly shut down the portal, severing the link between his world and Bill's.
He then tried to destroy the journals. For whatever reason, he couldn't bring himself to do it. They were his life's work. The knowledge could've been used as a gift to mankind. He wasn't going to destroy it all out of spite. He was gonna find a way to destroy Bill instead.
Bill might've been a god, but Ford was a scientist.
The first thing he did was prevent Bill from being able to enter the lab and restart the portal. Ford knew Bill would know the password and hidden keys. He also knew when Bill possessed a creature, their eyes would slightly alter, so he created a retinal scanner to keep Bill out.
Ford woke up the next morning feeling excruciating pain on his left eye. He rubbed his eye. When he looked at his hand, it was covered in blood.
In a panic, Ford ran into the bathroom. He looked at himself in the mirror and saw the unthinkable.
His left eye was completely gone.
Ford quickly grabbed some supplies and crafted a small eyepatch. He put it over his eye. As much as he hated he was missing an eye, he had to admit, he looked cool in an eyepatch.
But his missing eye got him thinking. This had to be Bill's doing. If he could, he would just make Ford kill himself in any way imaginable, but he didn't. Why? To send a message: that Ford was Bill's toy. He could do whatever he wanted.
Ford snapped out of his thoughts when he heard a fire crackling coming from the living room. Worried the shack was on fire, Ford hurried to find the fire extinguisher.
It was just a fire in the fireplace. That wasn't enough to calm Ford down. He saw not only was there a fire, but a cup of tea and a chess set laid out on the coffee table. On the fridge, the magnets were arranged in a particular order.
'LOOKY HERE'.
There was a sticky note with an arrow pointed down. Ford looked down and saw a VHS tape with the words, 'PLAY ME', written on it.
He inserted the tape to the VCR.
Play "Sweet Dreams" by The Eurythmics
The first thing to appear on screen was Bill, in Ford's body, playing with a sock puppet.
Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
"Welcome back to 'Pupper Hour with Bill'," he said. "Say hi, kids! Today's puppet is my old pal, Sixer. Sixer's had a rough day, but his night was even rougher. Wanna see?"
I traveled the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something
The screen then depicted a montage of Bill making Ford do the most horrible things.
Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to be used by you
Stand on top of a car while swinging his shirt.
Roll in the grass naked.
Get a sexual tattoo.
Smack the sheriff in the belly.
Eat spiders, the venomous kind.
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused
Play darts at a bar, then 'accidentally' take out his left eye with one of them.
But the worst one was Bill going to a payphone, inserting a quarter, and dialing a number. Ford recognized it as Stanley's number from an infomercial he saw a few days prior.
"Hey brother, it's Sixer," Bill said in his best Ford impression (which was actually his worst). "I'm going to take a swim in the frozen lake, and if I don't make it back, just know that it's all your fault. BYE!"
Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
I traveled the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something
Luckily, that payphone was out of order. Bill didn't care, though. He just turned to the camera, glaring at Ford menacingly.
"Tsk tsk tsk," he said. "Look what you made me make you do. Tomorrow's tape is gonna be much worse. Want the show to end? Go downstairs and turn on the portal, or I'm gonna have to show you what I'm really capable of."
Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
I traveled the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something
End "Sweet Dreams"
With that, the tape ended. Ford hurled it into the fire.
"YOU HAVE NO POWER HERE!" he screamed. " YOU'RE JUST IN MY MIND! I CAN OUTLAST ANYTHING YOU CAN…"
Then Ford blacked out.
When he opened his eyes, Ford found himself in a black void. His body was paralyzed. He felt his bones being slowly pulled out of their sockets. It was excruciating. He tried to scream, or use his powers, but he was unable to.
"Think, Sixer," came Bill's voice. "You let me in your head! Do you realize what I can do in here if I want? I can flip a switch that makes every neuron burn with pain beyond your imagination! I can rewire your optic nerve so the sky is below you! I can play a tone that gets louder and louder until you bash in your own skull! I can even delete memories maybe, just for fun! Maybe I already have. What do you want to remember? Your mother's face? Your own name? Who are you anyway?"
"That's ridiculous!" Ford replied. "I'm… I'm…"
Ford panicked. He couldn't recall his own name. He began to shake.
Bill flipped his fingers like he was turning on a light switch, and the name came to Ford.
"I'm Stan…"
Before he could finish, though, Bill flipped the switch again. Ford went blank. He felt his sockets start to strain. Any second, his tendons would pop and his bones would splinter. He fell to the ground, on the verge of vomiting.
"YOU'RE MY PROPERTY!" Bill shouted. "DON'T FORGET IT! The hillbilly abandoned you, your father won't want you returning without millions, and you have no friends. If you died out here in the snow, who would even miss you? Turn on the portal! I WAITED FAR TOO LONG FOR THIS! BY THE WAY, I'M SENDING SOMEONE TO STEAL YOUR OTHER EYE! THAT'S NO JOKE! I HAVE A FRIEND THAT WILL STEAL, YOUR, EYE! You have 72 hours. DON'T CROSS ME AGAIN!"
Ford bursted awake, heart pounding, to find himself back in his living room.
He knew that Bill was right. He had no one to turn to.
No one except one.
End of Flashback
"And the rest, as they say, is history," Ford finished. "Bill's been waiting for the gateway to reopen ever since then. All he needs to do is get his hands on this rift. To him, it's just a game, but for us, it's the end of our world."
Dipper fully realized the severity of the situation.
"Oh man," he said.
A bit later, Dipper and Ford were in the dining room drinking some pitt cola.
"I'm so embarrassed about earlier," Dipper admitted. "I'm such an idiot."
"From now on, no more secrets between us," Ford decided. "We're not the first two idiots to be tricked by Bill, but if we work together, we could be the last."
Dipper felt a bit of assurance, but it didn't last long. "But what about Bill? I broke the machine. Now we have no way to protect the shack."
That's when Mabel appeared holding a strand of rainbow hair. She had the brightest smile as if she wasn't covered in rainbow blood.
"Did someone say, 'unicorn hair'?" she asked.
Behind her, Evan, Wendy, Candy, and Grenda came in. They all looked alright, though they were a bit bruised.
"Uh, no," Dipper replied bluntly.
"Oh," Mabel sighed. "That would've been perfect. Either way, we got some unicorn hair."
"We also got unicorn tears," Candy added.
"And blood," Evan mentioned.
"They even gave us this treasure so we'd leave them alone," Grenda finished.
Wendy took out a treasure chest and poured the treasure onto the table.
"It can't be," Ford said excitedly. "This is a great day, girls. With this unicorn hair, we'll be able to completely shield the shack from Bill's mind-reading tricks."
"Is it okay?" Mabel asked.
"It's perfect. You've protected your family. You're a good person, Mabel."
"Thanks, Grunkle Ford, but today, I learned that morality is relative."
That's when Stan came in and grabbed as much of the gold as possible. "Money!"
The next morning, Dipper and Ford applied the unicorn hair around the shack. It formed a barrier.
"Perfect," said Ford. "This will protect us from Bill. As long as we're inside, our minds are safe."
The two high-fived.
Meanwhile, Bill was watching everything from his realm.
"I may not be able to possess anyone inside the shack," he said. "But I can still find my next pawn on the outside."
Bill looked through a list of Gravity Falls citizens. He stopped when he found Preston Northwest.
"Hmm, I guess it's time to pay an old friend a visit," he decided.
A.N.
Now this was a chapter I was looking forward to.
This was another one of the more controversial episodes, mainly because it was Alex's response to the Mabel critics, and, well, we all know how critics react when they're called out.
When I initially started writing this, I did believe what some people said about how the twist with the unicorns being scammers was just the show's way of acting like Mabel's perfect and whoever disagrees is crazy, but, like I mentioned before, Cartoonshi's Mabel defense video pointed out the flaws in that logic and helped me learn my lesson.
As a result, I kept the twist, but changed it so the fight in the end was just a one-on-one between Mabel and Celestabelle, and not a free-for-all between the girls and the unicorns. I just thought it made more sense, since those other two unicorns did nothing wrong. If anything, they were the ones calling out Celestabelle.
Speaking of which, yes, I know her name is actually Celestabellabethabelle, but there's no way I'd type that whole name every single time, so I shortened it so it's easier for me.
And yes, like Dipper, Mabel is also a victim of abuse by her dad. I know some people (specifically one person) don't like my portrayal of Dipper and Mabel's dad, which I completely understand, but I personally believe it makes sense as it explains both of their mentalities and actions throughout the series.
I was initially gonna include a scene where Evan comforts Mabel after Celestabelle's words remind her of her dad, while also having this be the episode where Mabel realizes her crush on Evan, but I scrapped it in favor of something better.
You may have noticed the bit where Evan and Grenda weren't allowed in the unicorn's gland.
Well, initially, it was just supposed to be Evan, mainly to make fun of how out of place he is, being the one boy in a group full of girls.
As I started writing this, though, I decided to have Grenda not be allowed in either. A small headcanon I had for a while is that Grenda is a trans girl. I personally believe it makes sense, as it would explain why she has such a deep voice. It also aligns with the episode's themes about toxic femininity.
Are you ever just gonna accept that you're just a creep? I mean, you're constantly changing genders and sexualities in all these people just so you can meet your queer quota.
Bill, stop. I know what you're doing. You're just trying to make me feel bad about myself for just writing dark fanfictions with queer representation. It isn't going to work. I can't tell you how close you got to convincing me you were right, but I'm not falling for your tricks. I'm not trying to meet a "queer quota". I'm genuinely trying to be inclusive. As for the angst, if there's one thing I've learned in writing, it's that you gotta be willing to break the characters down so they can build themselves back up again, stronger than ever, to give them resolve and a reason to keep fighting, that way when they win in the end, their victory feels earned, and not handed to them on a silver platter.
Anyway, one thing I really want to do in these last few chapters is flesh out Evan's dynamic with Candy and Grenda, that way he doesn't come off as a Satellite Love Interest to Mabel. The subplot between Evan and Grenda is just part of it.
Anyway, the best part for me was the Dipper and Ford B-plot. In this version, it reveals not just Ford's history with Bill, but also an explanation as to how he lost his eye (even if it was obvious from the beginning), and incorporating some of the stuff revealed in the Book of Bill, like how Bill mentally tormented Ford.
While I may not have said it directly, I hopefully made it obvious that Dipper's powers were a side-effect to Bill possessing him, as Ford gained these powers too, at the exact same time Bill became his muse.
Lastly, there's a little stinger for what the original Pacifica chapter is going to be. Stay tuned.
Thanks for reading.