Author's Note: HFWEIAHFIH I GOT INSPIRED AFTER READING A CUTE AF WLW FIC OF TANYA AND AN OC, SO I WANTED TO MAKE MY OWNN 33 Note that romance won't happen until a few chapters later, and even then it's definitely going to take a WHILE for Tanya to accept her feelings, as y'all know. Also! I have NO IDEA how to write military strategies or anything like that, so if something sounds informal, just know I tried. (I rlly be making one fanfic after another and omfg I just have so many ideas I can't focus on one at a time.)

Edit 10/19/2024: HELLO! I've been wanting to revisit this fic for a while now, and I've finally got the motivation and inspiration to do so, lmao. I've tweaked some things to match canon in the novel, so hopefully things are a bit more aligned to the timeline.

Warning: manipulation, abandonment, mention of depression

Disclaimer: Bruh, I don't own Youjo Senki: The Saga of Tanya the Evil, all rights go to the Carlo Zen!

Beginning...

Though the Empire and the Republic weren't officially at war yet, the shadow of conflict loomed heavily over the land. The Empire, once a place of prosperity, now saw its low class struggling under the crushing weight of poverty and famine. Areas like Magdalena Hohenheim's hometown were decimated by the scarcity of food and resources. Families, desperate to survive, fell into bankruptcy, and some even made the agonizing decision to send their children away to orphanages. In their eyes, it was a way to lessen the burden on themselves. Ironically, many of the children in these orphanages had heard the tale ofHansel and Gretel—a story of abandonment and rejection—a tale that seemed all too real for them now.

Magdalena, a young girl of seven, was one of these unfortunate souls. She could still remember the night her parents argued loudly, their voices raised in frustration and anger. It was a familiar scene, one she had grown used to as tensions in their small home rose with every passing day of hunger. She had curled up on her cot, trying to shut out the noise, but then the door to her room burst open, and there they were—her parents, standing over her. That night was a blur, but what Magdalena would never forget was her father grabbing her, dragging her into their dilapidated automobile, and driving her to the orphanage on the outskirts of town.

She screamed and cried, begging him to stop, but it was no use. He had made up his mind. And just like that, she was left there, sobbing on the doorstep. The orphanage's cold stone walls were a sharp contrast to the warmth she once knew. A kind sister from the church took her inside, trying to calm the terrified child, but Magdalena was too devastated to respond. She fell unconscious from the exhaustion of her grief.

When she woke, she found herself in a small room surrounded by children of all ages. Their faces were weary, and their eyes carried the same emptiness that filled her own.

She didn't belong here. She was not an orphan.

She had a family!

But now, she was nothing more than a discarded child, left behind in the wake of a world slowly unraveling.

For weeks, Magdalena shut herself off from everyone. She refused to speak, ate little, and spent most of her time curled in a ball, crying quietly in the dark. She couldn't understand why her parents had abandoned her, and the pain of rejection twisted deep inside her heart. Every night, she whispered into the void, asking God why this had happened, wondering why she had been forsaken. She had grown up with the practice of saying prayers before bed and supper, just as her parents had taught her. But now, those words felt like an empty mockery.

Sister Erika, however, refused to give up on her. With her kind smile and gentle words, she tried time and again to break through Magdalena's wall of silence. She called the young girl an "angel," complimenting her delicate, magenta eyes and her hair—golden with a warm reddish hue—standing out among the other children. Despite her beauty, Magdalena felt lifeless inside, like a doll with no soul.

Over time, the persistent kindness of Sister Erika began to chip away at her frozen exterior. She still didn't speak much, but she no longer curled into herself with the same intensity. For the first time in a long while, she allowed herself to feel something—a faint flicker of warmth, though the weight of her abandonment still held her down.

As the months passed, the orphanage became a grim reminder of the poverty outside its walls. The sisters did their best to care for the children, but resources were scarce. The food was thin, and the broth they served tasted of nothing but salt and disappointment. But Magdalena, along with the others, ate what they were given. She had no choice. She had to survive.

But survival was hard when death lurked so close. Magdalena had witnessed the frail child in the cot next to her succumb to illness and starvation. It wasn't the first death she had witnessed since arriving at the orphanage, but it was the first that broke her. That night, she wept uncontrollably as the sisters rushed to remove the body, trying to calm her before any of the other children could wake up. Magdalena's heart had hardened, but in that moment, the reality of her world crashed down on her again.

Then, in early 1921, when Magdalena was eight, everything changed.

A group of specialists arrived at the orphanage, bringing with them strange devices and machines that hummed with a peculiar energy. The children were gathered in the main hall, where they were told they would undergo tests to assess their potential. Most of the children were nervous, but Magdalena didn't know what to expect. She barely understood the purpose of the tests, but she went along with it.

She was led forward, stripped down to her bloomers, and seated in front of a machine. A man dressed in a dark coat and cap strapped a strange metal helmet to her head, connecting wires to a box. The man then scattered a few objects on the floor in front of her, though Magdalena couldn't understand why.

"Just relax, and try to feel something inside yourself," the man instructed, his voice calm and neutral.

Magdalena blinked, confused. "Feel something?"

"You'll know," he said, offering a vague smile.

She closed her eyes, trying to focus on the task at hand.Feel something,she repeated to herself in her mind. She focused inward, unsure of what she was supposed to find. Then, there it was—a strange sensation deep within her chest, as if something was reaching out, pulling at her from the inside. She hesitated, but then, she stretched out in response to the feeling. It grew stronger, warmer, like sunlight breaking through a darkened room.

Suddenly, the objects on the floor lifted off the ground, floating around her in the air. Magdalena stared in awe and confusion, unsure of what was happening. The other children gasped, but before anyone could react further, the objects shot off in every direction, narrowly missing those around her. Magdalena ducked, wide-eyed, as the chaos unfolded around her.

The man with the clipboard wrote something down and gave her a brief nod before dismissing her. Magdalena stood frozen for a moment, unsure of what to make of what had just happened. She hadn't known she had that power—she hadn't even known shecoulddo that. She turned to the man, her voice small and trembling.

"Excuse me, mister… What does this mean for me?"

The man looked down at her with an unreadable expression, his face obscured by the shadow of his cap. "The sisters will explain," he replied curtly. "But I hope to see you enlisted in a few years, should you desire it." He tipped his hat and walked away, leaving Magdalena to process the implications of his words.

Sister Erika approached her, her face a mixture of concern and surprise. "Magdalena, what you did earlier... What you showed, it's not something ordinary. You have an aptitude for magic, a strong one. The Imperial Army conducts these tests to scout potential mages."

Magdalena's heart raced.The Imperial Army?She could barely grasp the meaning of it all. But as the words settled, a new reality took root inside her. She didn't know what the future held, but one thing was certain: she couldn't stay in this orphanage forever.

Sister Erika's voice brought her back to the present. "You don't have to join the Army, Magdalena. You could stay here, get adopted by a family. I'm sure someone would take you in."

Magdalena's eyes hardened.Adopted?She was no fool. She knew the chances of being adopted were slim. The world was too full of suffering, too full of people who couldn't afford to take in another child. She knew the reality.

Magdalena nodded, causing sister Erika letting out a sigh of relief before smiling at her and bringing her inside. Magdalena appreciated her concern over someone like her, but as it stands, the army was most likely her only way out of poverty.The Army was her only way out.It wasn't ideal, but it was the only choice she had. Soldiers had food, shelter, and money. It was more than what the orphanage could offer. And for once in her life, Magdalena felt a glimmer of hope.

She was tired of starving, tired of suffering. She had a chance, and she was going totake it.

It had only been a week since Magdalena had made her decision, but the days dragged by in the orphanage. The suffocating reality of her situation pressed in on her, but the thought of joining the Imperial Army—of becoming something greater—was the only thing that kept her going. Finally, unable to endure any longer, she begged Sister Erika to take her to the Imperial Army Officer Training School. The sister was reluctant, torn between the fear of what might happen to the young girl and the reality that this was likely her only shot at a better life.

"I can't promise you anything," Sister Erika said softly, as she relented. "But if this is what you want, I'll support you."

Magdalena's heart raced as she clutched her application papers tightly in her small hands, her palms growing clammy with nerves. Standing in her old white dress, her hair combed and braided into two neat parts, she felt small—insignificant, even. But she couldn't let that show. Not here. Not now. The sister had insisted on "dolling her up" for the formal meeting, despite Magdalena's lack of a wardrobe. So, she stood outside the interview room, anxiously waiting for her turn.

Deep breaths.No. I won't let this chance slip away.

She shut her eyes for a moment, blocking out the world around her.I will get into this school. I will become a soldier. No matter what it takes.

With that firm resolve in her mind, the door opened, and out stepped a blonde girl who looked about the same age as Magdalena. The girl wore a blue bow and a dress that matched it perfectly. Her wide, icy blue eyes scanned the room and then locked onto Magdalena's. There was something about her, an air of confidence that Magdalena couldn't ignore.

The girl seemed just as surprised as Magdalena to see another child there, but she spoke first. "You're next," she said, her voice clear and confident.

"Oh, uh… Thanks," Magdalena murmured, her face flushing as she stepped forward, feeling the weight of her nerves settle on her shoulders.

Inside the room, two military officers sat at a desk, their expressions unreadable. One of them muttered, "Another kid? This is unexpected."

Magdalena stood in front of them, trying to keep her posture as formal as possible. Her hands, stiff and trembling slightly, were clasped together in front of her. She had to keep her voice strong. She had to keep control. This was her one shot.

The first officer spoke. "You have a strong aptitude for magic. But as I asked the girl before you, why volunteer at such a young age?"

Magdalena kept her voice firm as she replied, "Survival. The Empire has my loyalty, it's the only thing I have left for me." The two looked at each other in mild surprise before proceeding with the interview.

There was a brief moment of silence as the officers exchanged a look. Magdalena held her ground, refusing to show any sign of weakness. She couldn't afford to.

The second officer nodded slowly. "We've heard enough. Welcome to the Cadet Corps."

Magdalena blinked, stunned by how quickly it had happened. It was all so surreal—just like that, she was accepted. Not that she was ungrateful. But she hadn't expected it to be this fast.

In the months that followed, Magdalena arrived at the Cadet Corps in early 1922, dressed in her new uniform. The crisp blue jacket, the neat trousers, and the small red jewel on her collar—an operation orb to help channel her mana. She kept her hair in the same two-braid style as before, a small homage to the sisters who had cared for her, even if they had ultimately failed to prevent her departure.

Standing in formation with the other cadets, she couldn't help but feel out of place. The other cadets, mostly older and more experienced, towered over her, and they looked at her with a mixture of curiosity and condescension. It didn't help that she was the only girl, or that her small, thin frame made her feel like an outsider.

As the ceremony continued, she kept her head straight, staring ahead, focusing on not drawing attention to herself. But then she noticed a familiar face out of the corner of her eye. It was the blonde girl from before—the one who had told her she was next. She was standing just a few paces away.

Magdalena felt a small comfort at seeing someone her age, someone who, like her, seemed misplaced in this environment. After all, they both had the same burden: survival. Magdalena couldn't help but glance at her now and then, her curiosity piqued.

Once the ceremony was over, Magdalena went through the motions of settling into her new life. She attended classes, studied the military strategies, and trained hard every day. It was grueling work, but it was the life she had chosen. Still, she couldn't shake the feeling that there was something else. Something... about that blonde girl.

It wasn't until a few weeks later, after a particularly intense training session, that Magdalena finally gathered the courage to speak to her. She approached Tanya as she was packing up her things, feeling her heart hammer in her chest.

"Excuse me?" Magdalena said softly, her voice barely more than a whisper.

Tanya turned to her, eyebrow raised, her posture confident and poised. "Yes?" she asked, her tone cool but polite.

Magdalena shifted nervously on her feet. "Are we the same age? I'm eight…" she trailed off, unsure why she felt so shy asking such a simple question.

Tanya took a moment to assess her before answering, her gaze calculating. "I'm seven," she replied. "We're in the same class. My name is Tanya Degurechaff, though I'm sure you heard it earlier."

Magdalena blinked in surprise. She had assumed Tanya was older, given the way she carried herself. She was so sure of herself, so composed, that it made Magdalena feel small in comparison.

"I'm Magdalena Hohenheim," she said, offering a small but genuine smile. "It's nice to meet you."

Tanya gave a small nod, her eyes flicking over Magdalena briefly before she spoke again. "Was there something else?"

Magdalena hesitated, then shook her head. "No. I just... wanted to introduce myself."

Tanya paused, and for a moment, Magdalena thought she was going to say something else. But then the younger girl simply nodded, her demeanor cool. "Alright. I'll see you around, then."

Magdalena watched her walk away, feeling a strange mix of relief and disappointment. Tanya's aloofness made her feel like an outsider again, but in a strange way, it made her feel less alone. Tanya, like her, had chosen this path—this cruel, unforgiving world—and that was something Magdalena could respect, even if Tanya didn't seem to care for her company.

A couple weeks flew by, and Magdalena started to grow a small attachment to Tanya, despite their stiff second meeting. Throughout the time they spent in class, Magdalena took notice of Tanya's behavior. How she'd never interact with the other students unless they approached her first, how she'd spend her free time alone in the library reading- it all tallied down to one thing in her mind. Tanya must feel lonely and left out because she's incredibly younger than the entire students body, which Magdalena often felt herself.

Figuring that since they were the same age, it wouldn't hurt to stick by someone who was in a similar position to her. And so, Magdalena started talking to her more. After class or during small periods of free time, Magdalena would trail behind Tanya, making small talk with her in an effort to ease the awkward tension between them. Tanya didn't seem to mind, although there were some moments where she said she would be busy and needed time alone, which she respected.

As they talked more, Magdalena couldn't help but feel as if there was a giant gap between their ages, mentally, at least. She knew this from the first time they talked on campus, but she still felt slightly insecure of her own manners and the way she spoke. Magdalena was timid and quiet, tending to hesitate before saying even the simplest greeting. Tanya was firm and charming, knowing exactly what to say without having to think over her words. Still, despite Magdalena's insecurities, Tanya's bigger presence gave her a sense of comfort, reassured her that she knew how to take control of wouldn't say they were friends, but secretly, she hoped they could be.

Months passed, and the bond between Magdalena and Tanya continued to evolve. Despite the initial awkwardness, they found some comfort in each other's presence. One afternoon, as they sat outside during a break, reading in the quiet solitude, Magdalena gathered the courage to ask Tanya something that had been weighing on her mind for a while.

"Tanya?" she asked, voice barely above a whisper.

"Hm?" Tanya glanced up from her book, offering her usual detached look.

Magdalena hesitated, shifting uncomfortably on the grass. "Do you... do you think I'm a nuisance? I mean, I know I follow you around a lot... and if I'm annoying, just tell me."

Her heart pounded in her chest as she waited for Tanya's response. She had never quite asked a question like this before, unsure if it would push Tanya further away.

Tanya blinked, her pale face unreadable for a moment. "No. You're not a nuisance. You'll make a fine soldier. And I don't intend on making enemies with you. You don't seem to be vying for the same things I am, so there's no reason for me to dislike you."

"Useful?" Magdalena asked, more curious than offended.

Tanya nodded, her eyes narrowing slightly, as if already calculating something in her mind. "You have a large reserve of magic, correct?"

Magdalena nodded, not entirely following. Tanya continued, "Mages with large magic reserves are usually recommended for healer positions. Your mana pool is more than enough. You may not think it, but you'd be useful to others in that role. Even if you're discarded afterward, at least you'd have some worth."

The word "useful" hit Magdalena in a way she hadn't expected. For the first time, Tanya's words didn't sting. Instead, they gave her a strange sense of validation. It wasn't the same as being called a friend, but in a world where everyone seemed to be expendable, being deemed "useful" gave her a sense of purpose she hadn't realized she needed.

Magdalena didn't know how to respond, but she couldn't help herself. "I understand. I can... I can be useful." She gave a small, tentative smile, though it quickly faded.

The silence between them was heavy, but not uncomfortable. It wasn't until a few minutes later that Magdalena spoke again, her voice quieter this time, as if weighing her words carefully.

"Tanya... can I ask you something?"

Tanya didn't look up, but her tone was neutral as she responded. "What is it?"

Magdalena swallowed hard, her fingers nervously playing with the end of her braid. "Why did you join the military? What made you choose this life?"

Tanya stared off into the distance, her eyes cold and calculating. "It's the only option I had. I was an orphan. No family, no future. The military gave me a chance to build something for myself. A career. A life away from the front lines. A place in the rear echelon, away from the worst of the fighting."

Magdalena 's eyes widened. So she was right, Tanya was just like her! "I'm an orphan, too!" she suddenly exclaimed, eagerly leaning in before realizing what she was doing and flushing, settling down and shyly looking into her lap. "Um- I didn't mean that as a bad thing, of course! I mean- it is a bad thing but a good thing for me! Ah, not you being an orphan! J-just-Oh..." she groaned, covering her beet red face with her hands.

She peeked through her fingers as she heard Tanya chuckle, feeling her chest warm at the sight of the usually cold and blank slate of a girl seem a little carefree for once. "No need to worry, I know what you mean."

Magdalena slumped over and sighed before letting out a nervous laugh, her braids falling over her shoulder. "I-I mean to say that...I relate to you, very deeply. Maybe we don't have the same goal in mind, but...I'm an orphan as well. My parents, they, um, abandoned me at an orphanage one night and never looked back. Thinking about it now, I guess I understand that food was scarce, but to discard their own child like that...I could never forgive that. So, like you, I joined the military, figuring I had no other option. I had an opportunity to survive, so I took it."

She didn't know why she spilled her entire life story like that, but she supposed Tanya was trustworthy. Maybe Tanya didn't consider her a friend, but to Magdalena, Tanya would be the only friend she'd ever had, the only friend sheneeded. And Tanya needed her too, right? I mean, she did say she was useful. So they needed each other, for different purposes maybe, but equally needed.

For a long moment, Tanya didn't say anything, her expression unreadable. Magdalena's heart pounded in her chest, but she held her breath, waiting for a response.

Finally, Tanya nodded, though she didn't offer any more insight into her own feelings. "I see."

Magdalena slumped a little, feeling the weight of their shared understanding settle between them. She was used to silence, but with Tanya, it felt different. It felt safe.

Then, Tanya spoke again, her voice hardened. "Do you believe in God?"

Magdalena blinked in surprise. Tanya, of all people, asking about religion? It felt out of place. Tanya had never mentioned God or faith before, and had always been distant when others discussed religion.

"I... I did, once. When I was still with my family," Magdalena said slowly. "We'd pray before meals, go to church. It was just something we did, I guess. But now, I'm not so sure. I can't say I believe anymore, not with everything I've been through. But... it's hard to let go of everything I was taught, even if I'm not sure if I still want to follow it."

Tanya didn't immediately respond. Her gaze remained fixed ahead, as though she were considering something deeply. "That's understandable," she finally said, nodding as though she'd come to some conclusion in her mind.

Magdalena frowned slightly. "But... what about you? Why ask me about God?"

Tanya's eyes narrowed. "Because I've always wondered what others think. Especially people like you. I know you're not really religious, but there's still a part of you that holds onto it, even if you don't understand why. You know what I think of God, though. He cursed me to this life. To this hell."

Tanya's voice trembled with restrained rage, a fire in her eyes that could burn holes into the grass. At least, that's what Magdalena imagined. Although, it was strange. As Tanya mentioned being cursed to this life, it sounded as if there was another meaning behind that statement.

"I don't think there's a higher power out there looking out for us. If there was, none of this would be happening. Children dying, people living in poverty and desperation. There's no reason for it."

Magdalena's chest tightened at Tanya's words, anger rising in her at the thought of everything she had suffered, everything they both had.

"I... I hate God too," Magdalena muttered, surprising herself.

Tanya turned to look at her, a smirk curling on her lips, her icy blue eyes gleaming with something almost dangerous. "Then we can hate Him together."

Magdalena felt her heart race, and she didn't know why she felt her face heated up. She wasn't embarrassed anymore, so why was she feeling her cheeks redden? Her chest felt warm and fluffy, as if she was wrapped up in a comforting hug.

Together? Tanya had said...the two of them? Just them?

"Yeah," Magdalena whispered, her voice steady but full of resolve. "Just the two of us. Against God. Against the world."

Tanya knew she had the girl wrapped around her finger in that moment.

...To be continued...