A/N:Chapter 3 was a little shorter than I thought. So as a bonus, here is chapter 4. Merry Christmas!
Sora and Riku left the island shortly after. They both silently agreed to leave after Sora's breakdown. Sora was kicking himself for breaking in front of Riku. Even though the older man assured him that he had nothing to be embarrassed about.
Sora couldn't help but do so anyway. He hated appearing weak to Riku. He was always better than Sora at everything. Even though Riku chose the Darkness it didn't seem to haunt him like Sora. In Sora's eyes Riku was the calm and collected man he's always been.
Sora hated it, if he was being honest with himself. All of this could have been avoided if Kairi kept her promise. She wasn't supposed to tell Riku.
They made it to the mainland and headed for Riku's apartment. Kairi asked Sora to stay at Riku's place tonight and get his things tomorrow. Sora agreed, not wanting to return to the home they once shared so quickly after breaking up. It was still weird to him that he was no longer with Kairi, but he was never really with her. He used her so he didn't have to be alone, and Kairi knew that.
She accepted it and Sora never understood why. Maybe she hoped it wouldn't be like this forever? Maybe she hoped Sora would be Sora again, but it never happened. It probably never will.
Riku entered his apartment with Sora following behind. Sora shut the door and stood at the entrance awkwardly glancing around Riku's apartment as Riku headed for the kitchen. Sora had never been in Riku's apartment, and now he was going to stay here.
This was all too real now. Sora and Kairi aren't together anymore. They won't be sharing a house, sharing a bed. Sora is going to be alone again. He can't be alone, no, no if he's alone. Then…then he…
Sora started to hyperventilate, unable to calm himself down. His heart was racing and his body started to feel warm. Was…was he dying? He wasn't sure. The room was too small, and he felt like he couldn't move. He was frozen in place staring at the floor and shaking. What was going on with him?
"Sora…Sora!" Riku called suddenly in front of the younger man. Sora looked up at Riku seeing the concern in his eyes but couldn't stop his panicking. "It's okay Sora, it's okay, take a deep breath." Riku instructed, "In…" Riku started and demonstrated taking in a deep breath, "And out," he said as he released the breath.
At first Sora's "deep breaths" were shallow and were doing nothing to calm him down. But after a while of Riku continuing to take deep breaths in and out Sora finally started to follow suit. He felt his heart rate slow and his body temperature returning to normal.
He was guided to the couch and left for only a few moments before there was a glass of water in front of him. Sora glanced up to see Riku patiently waiting for Sora to take the glass. Sora took the glass and drank a generous amount.
"Thank you," Sora mumbled, feeling embarrassed yet again. This needed to stop happening.
"Of course, are you alright?" Riku asked, his voice laced with concern.
"I think so," Sora mumbled, not sure how to answer that.
"What happened?" Riku asked just as Sora feared.
"I-I don't want to talk about it," Sora tried to brush off. Riku sighed somewhat annoyed, he only wanted to help.
"Sora, you know you can tell me anything, right? I mean, why suggest staying with me if you aren't going to talk to me?" Riku pointed out.
Sora stared at him for a moment. It wasn't Sora's idea to stay with Riku, it was Kairi's, they argued for twenty minutes about it. Sora was so bothered by it he got up to go into the restroom to splash cold water in his face. The last place he wanted to stay was Riku's.
Not that he didn't like Riku, they were best friends…he just didn't want Riku to know. He wasn't supposed to know anything, but that didn't happen. Now here he was in Riku's apartment, and he was going to know everything. Just as Kairi did, but with Kairi it gradually got worse. Riku was getting the blunt force of it.
"Staying with you was Kairi's idea…" Sora pointed out looking away, "Did she tell you it was mine?" Sora asked as he looked back at Riku. He looked shocked but it quickly turned to anger. That alone told Sora all he needed, Kairi lied to him. For what? Sora wasn't sure and he gathered that Riku didn't either.
"Doesn't matter," Riku brushed off, though his tone was still angry, "You don't have to talk if you don't want to but know that I am here for you. I will understand better than anyone what you're going through. Trust me," Riku said calmly, giving Sora a reassuring smile as he stood. "I'm going to shower, make yourself at home,"
Sora sighed in relief as the bathroom door closed. Riku didn't press him, maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all. He would stay for a few days then find somewhere else to live. He didn't want anyone else to be troubled with his problems.
It wasn't fair for him to do it to Kairi. He should never have dated her. Not until he was himself again, but he didn't wait. He used her and now he was alone again. Well not alone, he did have Riku, but it wasn't the same as Kairi.
Kairi would comfort him by holding him close, kissing him and whispering encouraging words to make him better. She would rub his back and sometimes distract him with sex. It bothered him at first, but he soon realized that it was the only way she knew how to take his mind off the nightmares. That is until it stopped working.
Even so, Sora couldn't see Riku being as compassionate as Kairi was. He wasn't expecting Riku to sleep with him or anything. But he didn't think the man would hold him until he stopped crying. Or whisper to him that everything was going to be okay. No, Riku would make jokes to ease the tension, it helps at times, but Sora needs more than that.
Sora sighed, it's not like he had anywhere else to go. Maybe he could convince Riku not to worry about him and treat him as just a roommate? Yeah, a roommate with severe night terrors that causes him to destroy furniture. Sora groaned at the thought. He was going to make Riku's life difficult, just like he did Kairi's.
Soon Riku will be kicking him out because he can't deal with it either. Sora rubbed his face a few times before leaning back on the couch. His head rested flat, and he was looking at the ceiling as if it would give him all the answers. How did it get this bad?
The door to the bathroom opened and Sora continued to just stare at the ceiling as if he didn't notice. Riku walked past the couch as he dried his hair with a towel. He stopped, placed the towel over his shoulder and stared at the younger man confused. What was he looking at?
Riku looked up to see nothing of interest on the ceiling. He took a step towards the couch and cleared his throat, getting the man's attention. Sora lifted his head up and looked at Riku with a raised eyebrow.
"Nothing good on T.V.?" Riku teased. Sora inwardly groaned. There was Riku again, making jokes.
"I was just thinking," Sora said simply as he gave Riku a pointed look. Almost daring him to make a sarcastic remark about Sora thinking.
"Just making sure you weren't bored." Riku said instead much to Sora's surprise, "Shower is yours if you want it." Riku added before retreating to his room to change.
Riku groaned in frustration, Sora was being so difficult. He just didn't understand why the brunette simply couldn't talk to him! Riku threw his extra towel hard into his hamper in frustration. How could a man so hyper and cheerful be such a stubborn little shit?
Was it too much to ask Sora to talk to Riku about what the hell was going on? Kairi sure as hell didn't and she lied to him, right to his face! Did Riku somehow lose his credibility with his friends or something?
It took a moment to calm down before Riku could think rationally. It was understandable that Sora didn't want to tell Riku in the beginning that he was having trouble adjusting to being home. Riku had the same issue, he just handled it differently than Sora. He still has nightmares but they're nothing like Sora's.
Even so, Riku knows now. So, why keep hiding it as if he didn't know? If Sora was worried about judgment that should have gone away when Riku was in his house this morning. Everything was out in the open, so what's left to hide? Unless there was more that Sora wasn't telling him.
Riku sighed at the thought, he will just have to be patient with Sora. He quickly got dressed, only P.J. bottoms, and gathered some clothes for Sora. They will be way too big on him but it was better than him wearing the clothes he had on. Walking into the living room he found that Sora was no longer on the couch and the bathroom door was shut. Riku was a little relieved, he didn't want to face Sora yet. He was still angry, not only at him but at Kairi as well. He should call her tomorrow.
Riku headed into the kitchen to see what he could whip up for dinner. He groaned in annoyance. He realized he was going to go grocery shopping today but didn't because of last night. He retreated to his room once again to grab his phone.
When he walked back out Sora had emerged from the bathroom, in just a towel. Riku nearly dropped his phone. Sure, he's seen Sora shirtless, but it was different, the towel around his waist was hanging low on his hips. Not the kind of skin Riku was used to seeing on the brunette.
"Are these for me?" Sora asked, pointing to the folded clothes on the couch.
"I was going to order pizza," Riku said instead of answering Sora's question. He couldn't think straight.
"Okay, not what I asked," Sora said, giving Riku a confused look. It took Riku a moment to remember Sora's question. He shook his head and looked away from Sora. The man was a distraction.
"Sorry, long day I guess," Riku chuckled. "Yes, those are yours. Hope they aren't too big for you."
"You know they will be," Sora chuckled as he grabbed the clothes and headed into Riku's room, "Order pineapple pizza for me!" Sora added before closing the door behind him.
They were sitting on the couch eating pizza and watching a movie. They haven't talked much since Sora got out of the shower and it was bothering Riku. It's not that Riku wanted them to have a deep conversation or anything. He just wanted to have some kind of interaction with his friend. Was Sora nervous around Riku?
He couldn't blame him for all that's been happening, but they shouldn't be uncomfortable with each other. Sora kept glancing at Riku but would never say anything. He wasn't sure if the brunette wanted to say something to him or just make sure that Riku was still there. Whatever it was, it was driving Riku crazy.
"What?" Riku finally asked after the seventh-time Sora glanced at him.
"What?" Sora echoed as if he didn't know why Riku questioned Sora.
"You keep looking at me," Riku sighed, getting annoyed that he had to spell it out for him.
"No, I'm not." Sora said flatly, a blush creeping on his face.
"Right, that's why you're blushing." Riku teased as he shook his head, "Now what is it?" He pressed.
"I-I…well…I um," Sora shuttered, not sure how to put it into words.
"Just say it,"
Sora sighed and looked away before speaking, "The large scar…um how…how did you get that?" Riku glanced down at his chest as if not realizing he didn't have a shirt on.
"Oh, it was Roxas," Riku said casually as he grabbed another slice of pizza.
"R-Roxas, like…. me Roxas?" Sora gasped, baffled.
"Yup," Riku said as he took a bite, he chewed quickly before speaking again, "I was ordered to grab him, so we could restore your memories. Funnily enough he didn't want to come willingly, he attacked me and gave me this," Riku said as he pointed to the scar, "I almost died but I was able to knock him out and get back before I bled out."
"You don't seem bothered by it at all," Sora pointed out. He said it so casually that Sora doubted it ever bothered him.
"It was a long time ago." Riku brushed off. He didn't want to get into it. Roxas and Riku crossed paths before Ansem the Wise ordered him to grab Roxas. At the time, Riku had no idea that Roxas was Sora's Nobody.
"It couldn't have been that long ago, it was what? Two, three years ago?"
"I guess you're right," Riku mused, not realizing it hadn't been that long, "Even so I'm not bothered by it. I was able to help you because of it," He pointed out blushing a little because that's exactly why he helped Ansem the Wise in the first place. "What about you?" Riku asked quickly to get the conversation off him.
"What about me?"
"Well, I told you about my life-threatening injury, it's your turn. What was your close call?"
"Oh, um I…I don't wanna talk about mine," Sora said as he fidgeted.
"Oh, come on, it's only fair! It's not like I was the one who nearly killed you, right?" Riku asked unsure. Their battle was pretty intense.
"No, but I'm just…I don't know, self-conscious?"
"You don't think I am?" Riku asked, raising an eyebrow. Sora shook his head, "Well I am, I am forcing myself to be more comfortable with my scars. They hold a lot of bad memories, like betraying you and Kairi for example. I don't like looking at them or people seeing them, but my choices gave me these. They are a part of me, and I must live with them. Whether I like it or not,"
"So…you're ashamed of them?"
"I guess you could say that" Riku shrugged.
"Okay then," Sora nodded as he slowly removed his shirt. Riku swallowed, he shouldn't be turned on by this, but he was. Just a little. Sora turned his back to Riku to show him a large scar on his back. It started from the top of his right shoulder and went across to his left side ending at the bottom of his ribs. "I got that from Xaldin. Mickey came and saved me because Donald and Goofy were knocked out. If he didn't get there when he did Xaldin would've killed me." Sora explained as he turned back around to face Riku.
Riku gave Sora an encouraging smile, he was glad that he was finally opening up to him. They went back and forth, sharing where they got their scars and from who. It was nice for Riku to have someone to talk to about it. He didn't have anyone when they got back like Sora did.
That's why he went off on his own for a few months, it was the only thing he knew. But now that he had Sora with him it made everything better. Sora could relate better than anyone and it made things easier to talk about. They spent hours talking and when it started to get late Riku called it a night.
"I got to go to work in the morning," Riku sighed, not wanting to end their little memory lane.
"Oh," Sora frowned, feeling a little disappointed as well.
"We can continue tomorrow," Riku assured him, "I'm only working a few hours and then I'm taking the week off. You'll have me all to yourself." Riku smirked as he stood and headed to his room. He paused before going in, "Do you want my room? I can take the couch," Riku offered. If he had it his way, they would share a bed but they hadn't done that since they were kids. He didn't want to weird Sora out.
"Oh no that's alright, I'll take the couch tonight." Sora assured him.
"Okay, well there are extra pillows and blankets in that closet if you need them," Riku pointed, "Goodnight Sora, don't hesitate to wake me up if you need to."
"Thanks, Riku, goodnight," Sora smiled as Riku shut his door.