Chapter Thirteen
Making small talk with Narcissa Malfoy for an hour and a half was one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do, and that included both giving birth and dealing with multiple people I loved dying. We had no mutual acquaintances, other than Sirius, and as she hadn't seen him in years, that was rather a bust. Politics was a topic I wouldn't touch with her with a forty-foot stick, though I had a slight suspicion that her personal politics might actually have leant more toward mine than I would have originally guessed. In the end, we discussed our boys, a topic we both gratefully grasped upon once the three of them came over to us, one at a time, and climbed into our laps.
"Day-co, mumma," Harry babbled to me, pointing out his new friend like I hadn't been the one to introduce them.
"Yes, that is Draco, darling," I replied, absentmindedly smoothing his hair down. Until I comprehended his actual words with all the force of a sledgehammer to the heart. "But I'm Auntie, Harry love, Auntie Pet, not mumma."
"Mumma," he said, stubbornly jutting out his chin. Dudley just looked between him and me with a confused look on his face.
And I was nearing tears with a complete stranger sitting across from me. "Auntie, darling, not mumma."
"Mumma!" Dudley joined in this time, and both boys were nearing hysterics.
As was I, though for vastly different reasons. I couldn't replace Lily. I couldn't be his mumma when he already had one, even if she was gone. I couldn't do that to my baby sister-
"I'm sure your relationship with your sister was entirely different than mine with my sisters," Narcissa broke through my spiraling panic, "so I may be completely wrong, but if you're raising this boy as your own, you're going to do him more harm than good keeping him from calling you mum. You're the one who wipes his tears, tucks him in bed, kisses his hurts. You are his mother, whether you gave birth to him or not. And Merlin knows, even though I haven't spoken to my sister in nearly ten years, but if something happened to me and Draco had to go to my sister, I would want Meda to treat him as her son. Even if that happened to include him calling her mum."
My heart broke, again. "I just don't want to replace her," I sobbed, clutching both boys to me. Which, of course, made both of them begin crying, as well. "I don't want him to forget her! I don't want to forget her!"
My friends instantly rushed to comfort me and the boys, but we simply clutched harder to one another. There were many murmurs of "Of course you don't!" and "We'd never let that happen!" and "We'll make sure he doesn't!", but none of those helped me to feel better.
"You're not going to forget her," Narcissa said firmly, loud enough to drown out the rest. "You're not going to forget her, but Harry won't know her. You are the one he turns to, the one who is there for him. You are his mum, and denying it will only hurt both of you. You won't forget her, and Harry will learn about her through you. The best memorial you can give to your sister is to love and raise her son well, and then you can share your memories of her with him once he's old enough to understand."
Her words, said almost… clinically detached, shocked me silent. And they made so much sense. I could only stare at her over the two crying bodies on my lap.
"Petal, what's wrong? What did you do to her, Narcissa?"
Sirius burst into the room, wand raised as he charged toward his cousin. An anger I'd never seen before was written all over his face, and he looked ready to battle her. For me.
"Sirius, it's fine," I said, sniffling as I struggled to stand with the boys still in my arms.
"Then why are you crying?" he asked slowly, changing course to come to my side and take Dudley.
I brushed the tears from my face with my newly freed hand rather self-consciously. Even more so when I realised Moody, the Longbottoms, and a woman I vaguely recognized were right behind him. "I'll explain later, but I'm fine. Just a sudden burst of missing Lily."
His ire instantly turned to sympathy, and he squeezed my hand. "I'm sorry-" he began, but I brushed him off.
"I'm fine, and we have bigger things to worry about," I reminded. He still didn't look sure, so I caved. "I'll tell you about it later. It's nothing."
Sirius finally, reluctantly, let it go at that. But most probably only because he was determined to get it out of me later. I knew he would, he was stubborn enough, and he was always the one to make sure I wasn't closing myself off from the rest of them. Again. "Well, we're all here, so let's begin," he said, sitting down next to me.
Tina snorted and took Dudley from him. "The littles don't need to be part of the war council, Sirius. And I don't want to know more than I already do, because I'm a bit terrified of the whole thing, to be honest. So I'll take the littles to play and I'll get some tea for you all, and then you can plan to your hearts' content."
I stood to help, but Danae took Harry from me with a laugh even as Sirius aimed a pleading look my way. "I'll help with the tea and the boys," Danae said with a grin. "You and Re stay here and help Sirius."
"And Nic, if you would," Sirius added, uncharacteristically quiet. "We could use your help."
"Are you sure that's wise?" The woman I almost recognised spoke up, looking at Nic rather questioningly.
"I trust Nicholas Selwyn, Madame Bones," Sirius said solemnly, before any of the rest of us could jump to his defense. "I trust every person who lives in this household with Harry's life. No one under this roof is working for the other side."
Madame Bones, and now I recognised her to be the head of the DMLE, looked to Sirius with a long, measuring look, then nodded once decisively. "I apologise, Mr. Selwyn, but since I was the one to sign the arrest warrant for both your father and brother, I had to be cautious."
Nic lifted one eyebrow in that carelessly graceful way that only a pureblood could. "As the most frequent target of both of those people for most of my life, I completely understand your concern. However, as Sirius said, I would never hurt Harry. Lily and Petunia have been my family far more than either Alexander or Octavius ever were. I would kill anyone who ever came for Harry, for either boy, same as I suspect you would for your niece."
Madame Bones nodded once more, with respect flavouring the movement this time. "Far too many children have been orphaned because of this bloody war. Let's prevent any more children from becoming so."
Once the little boys were occupied in the library with Tina and Danae, including Draco, surprisingly, and we all had tea in front of us, Moody harrumphed to get our attention. "Now that we're all refreshed, can we begin?" he grumped.
In the end, Remus's proposed plan was agreed to be the soundest, even if there were some complications involved. "We'll have to tell each partnership the same time," Frank pointed out, "as we can't expect them to come at different times and not talk to each other as to why."
"So we arrest them both and interrogate them both to find out which one is the traitor," Moody retorted. "If they're not both involved. As we've already seen, it's often both in a pair that's been slipping information at best."
"You could always use Veritaserum," Narcissa suggested, as though it was the most obvious option, although both Moody and Madame Bones shook their heads.
"There's too many ways to fool Veritaserum," Moody said immediately, causing Madame Bones to snort a laugh.
"Not to mention it's illegal to use in an interrogation," she pointed out, but he batted it away with a scarred hand.
"Too bad there's not a charm that would keep them from telling other Aurors but would allow them to still tell the Lestranges," Remus mused, and the rest of us murmured in agreement.
"We'll have to send Neville and your mother somewhere else," Alice reminded Frank.
"You should go with-" Frank started, but her hard glare cut him off.
"If you ever want another child, you will not finish that sentence. I'm as qualified an Auror as you are, and I'm just as determined to protect our family. You're not foisting me off somewhere to wait to find out what happens."
"But what about Neville? He needs-"
"Your mother watches him every day, and she's more than capable of defending both of them."
"Send them here," I offered, only partially to save Frank from Alice's increasing wrath. "We've got more wards here on the house than Hogwarts, and there's plenty of adults around at all times."
"And our boys would love to play with Neville," Sirius added, squeezing my hand in agreement.
Frank and Alice shared a look, the kind that Lily and James used to, or Mum and Dad. It made my heart ache, just a little, both with missing my loved ones and with envy, but I pushed it aside as Frank replied, "Are you sure? Mother can be… a bit much at times."
Alice, Moody, and Madame Bones all snorted a laugh. "She can be downright terrifying, is what he really meant to say," Alice said, then hugged Frank's arm in a bit of a tactile apology. "And you know it's true, darling. Especially if someone she loves is being threatened."
He shrugged, not admitting it, but not disagreeing, either. "But are you sure it's okay, Pet?"
"I insist," I told him with a grin. "After all, I still owe you for helping me to arrange that Valentine's Day visit to Hogsmeade when we were Heads."
He laughed, breaking a bit of the tension in the room. "Well, it would be good for Nev to have someone else to play with. He's hardly left home since he was born, and he needs to see other kids."
"And not just old grumpy people," Alice muttered into her tea. Frank had the grace to pretend to not hear her.
A bit more planning took place, until Narcissa stood with an elegant grace that I envied. "It seems as though you have all you need from me, so Draco and I mush be getting back. We've been gone long enough, and I don't want the others to become suspicious."
"You can't be serious, Cissa, you can't go back there now!" Sirius cried, staring incredulously at her.
She merely raised an eyebrow in return. "If we don't go back, Lucius and Bella will know something is wrong, and all this planning will be for naught."
"You can't go back, Cissa. Bella will kill you if she finds out what you've done," he said softer, almost pleading. "And what about Draco? He's not safe there."
Her eyebrow softened, too. "Lucius would never allow harm to come to Draco, but I will have our house elf stay with Draco until this is over, just in case. And I can handle myself. I'll be fine, cousin. You'll see."
"Have your house elf bring Draco here, if you run in to any trouble," I found myself offering. "And you're more than welcome, as well, even if you don't run into trouble."
A small, pleased smile turned the corners of Narcissa's mouth up just the slightest. "Thank you. I don't anticipate any, but should trouble arise, we'll come here."
Sirius and I led her to the library to collect Draco, but it took the boys several minutes to finish their goodbyes. None of them were interested in parting ways just yet, and fits were thrown. We made many promises to get together soon, even though I wasn't sure I could keep them, before we were finally able to separate them. And then we walked her and Draco to the door, with me holding Dudley and Sirius holding Harry, and the boys still whimpering in displeasure.
"Be careful, Cissa," Sirius said lowly as she opened our front door. "If you think something is wrong, even if it blows our plans up, get yourself and Draco out of there. I… I would hate for something to happen to you."
She smiled, more widely than before. "We'll come here if something happens, but I've always been good at Occlumency, so Bella won't get anything from me. And Lucius doesn't realise I have a mind of my own, never has, so he won't think I could possibly do something to undermine him. We'll be safe, cousin."
"And then we'll have a playdate for the boys next week," I said, forcing as much cheer into my voice as possible. "We did promise them, after all."
Narcissa smiled again. "I like this one, Siri, you should keep her. We'll talk tomorrow, after all this is over." And then she walked out of the house and Apparated away before I could correct her.
"She's not- We're not- And she's gone," Sirius spluttered after her.
I stared at the place she'd last been at in confusion. "Why did she think… that?" I ignored the slight flutter in my stomach at the thought, since it was just ridiculous. We were friends, who happened to be raising children together. Nothing more.
Sirius laughed, a bit hysterically. "She's always loved to get under my skin. I'm sure it was nothing."
But even as we rejoined the others to finish planning, I couldn't get Narcissa's words out of my mind. Why had she thought we were together? And why did that thought make my heart race?
AN: And here's the next chapter! I know it's been forever, but anxiety sucks, guys. I promise I'll finish Pet's story, it's just gonna take a while. But thanks for all of you for sticking with me, and a big thanks to all of you who take the time to review. Those messages of love give me such a boost, and it's usually right when I need it most! I love you all!