Uploaded On: 15th November 2024.

Woe is Me
Apprehensive Standstill

A monumental noise is ricochetting beneath the arena where Natsuki awaits her fate.

Nervously rubbing her ear, she realises that she's still not used to the Meister GEM's presence. It's substantially heavier than any student GEM and is cool to the touch. "The Ice Silver Quartz…" She murmurs under her breath, smoothing her thumb along the argent crystal.

Helene had said that quartz is a form of glass. Admittedly she doesn't know much about this GEM. What little she does know is before the previous Deputy Column's inception, it had been dormant for decades. Veld is responsible for irreparable damage towards the Ice Silver Quartz's reputation.

Natsuki genuinely does not know how to go forward with this as the Headmeister. Quite frankly she's terrified that she'll somehow instantaneously wreck her own prestige. Veld was a foolish traitor; she however is no such thing.

Stressing a sigh, she collapses onto the bench behind her.

"Natsuki?"

Mai appears behind the door, poking her head out. "You look as nervous as me." She chuckles at it all, likely as a form of emotional self-regulation. "Haruka is coming down now—I'm terrified."

"Well don't just stand there, you're making me scared too." Natsuki gruffly admits, gesturing to the spot beside her. "Can I see your GEM? I've never seen the Fire Stirring Ruby before."

"Sure." Letting the door swing shut on its fire lock, Mai plops herself next to her. Brushing strands of hair away from her face, she positions herself so Natsuki can better see.

"It suits you." Natsuki says lamely, not knowing what to say.

The gemstone is an octagonal cut with what appears to be fire enveloping it. For safety, the stud post screws on, making losing it virtually impossible. But what interests Natsuki the most, is the swirling tomoe symbol. "This thing here—" She hovers her finger above the three-pointed design. "—isn't it a royal crest in Zipang?"

"Yeah, and ironically it's a fire ward in my culture."

What? Natsuki stares at her speechlessly for a moment before scrunching up her face. "Isn't the whole point of the Fire Stirring Ruby to—well, be fire?"

"Who knows, but I do know that it was going to be Zipang's royal GEM. But you know how my country is with otome. It's kind of funny, really." Receiving an odd look from Natsuki, she forces a wry smile, albeit not aimed at her. "I'm an estranged princess of Zipang, Natsuki. My people distrust the otome. Though my family's crest is on this GEM, they will never recognise me or it. I suppose what I'm getting at is that symbol—a mitsudomoe, by the way—is both my pride and enemy."

"No, I get you." Natsuki quickly understands. "I can relate, I think. Kruger Industries is now protected by Garderobe, but I'll have no legal say in what it does. Even when…" She stops herself mid-sentence, swallowing tightly.

"Because of your mother?" Mai dips forward to study Natsuki who hesitantly nods.

"Yeah, that." Veering her gaze away, Natsuki tries formulating a plan to change the subject. Miraculously indeed, this is when the door to the room opens.

"You really never change!" None other than Haruka Armitage, remarks unenthused at Shizuru. "Even I've heard the rumours."

"I have no idea what you are talking about, Armitage." Shizuru who has stepped inside lifts her head faintly in reaction to Haruka's jab. Now standing side-by-side with the blonde, she clasps her hands together in front of herself. "Gossip originating from Garderobe is always in a chain of misinterpretation."

Haruka scoffs, folding her arms. "Like otome relationships?"

What are they talking about? Natsuki exchanges looks with the two women impassively.

"Nevertheless, you should prepare, Haruka." The Archmeister motions her to Mai. "Yourself and Mai are up shortly."

Upon this statement, an ear-piercing electrical horn blares above them in the arena. A reverberating grinding then floods the room as the pillars adjust their positions. High in the metallic rafters these monumental arena pieces lower until slotting into standby.

"Guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be." Mai harmlessly slaps her thighs as she stands up. "You better have perfected your handling with your element this time, mentor." She teasingly grins at Haruka who cocks a brow.

"I—well of course!" Haruka, having been momentarily confused, returns the enthusiasm once understanding. "Let's leave these love-birds alone, I've been looking forward to seeing your guts." She wraps her arm around Mai's shoulders, leading her towards the arena entrance.

"I hope you mean my bravery and not my actual guts..."

Once the door shuts, all is silent within the subterranean changing room.

Natsuki, who honestly feels as though she's having an anxiety attack, mumbles incoherently. She's very aware of how formidable Shizuru is. How on Earl is she going to defeat a Column—the Archmeister, no less? Even though she has sparred with Shizuru countless times, she is terrified. It's especially evident now that Haruka and Mai have left.

Feeling a weight press to her knee, she freezes up.

"Natsuki." Shizuru disrupts her internal crusade. "I know that look, you are scared."

Briefly glancing at Shizuru's hand that's keeping her leg still, she refuses looking her in the eye. "Well yeah." Unconsciously fiddling with her tabard's ghastly ruffles, Natsuki's eyes fleetingly examine their surroundings. "It's been hours since I got this GEM. I know hardly anything about it. I don't even know what it looks like on me! How is that fair?"

"Indeed it may be unfair, but we want to assess how you respond to drastic challenges." Shifting to face Natsuki better, Shizuru takes her hands into hers. "Imagine the worst case scenario: masters have ordered their otome into full scale war. As the Headmeister, you will be expected to negotiate peace deals and build upon preventative policies. Only those with quick wit and fortitude can maintain the balance of Columnhood."

Weary eyes fall to Shizuru's lap.

"You…" Natsuki sighs, easing a hand from the Archmeister's to rub her temple. "You always know what to say."

"Only because I know you, Natsuki." Shizuru forces a smile, stroking the still captured hand's knuckles with her thumb. "That, and you have been troubled lately. At least once our duel concludes we shall have time to spend together."

Together.

The intruding heat is forecast to hit at any moment.

A/N: I dreamt Mai-HiME got an announcement trailer and it was a weird blend of Fuuka Taisen and Mai-Otome… Rena swooped in and defeated the entire HiME cast. I wish my brain would stop torturing me even in my sleep, this is ridiculous.

Anyway, somehow I managed to get this chapter done. My mental health has spiralled to its lowest depths; it's never been this bad before. Turns out I've been gaslighting my pain for decades and it fluctuates frequently. Woe is Me indeed…

I am open to critique, head canons and suggestions. It'd be nice to speak with more people for once. I say this because I've had eight PMs in two months consisting of art scams. Sadly I only got numbers like that (through genuine readers) back in 2009.

I thought our numbers would go up thanks to the anniversary, but… Whatever. I'll try and get other updates ready but don't expect anything for a while. The state of our fandom has seriously impacted me negatively (among other things).