Apologies for missing last week, it's a mad time of year for me, on with the show!

AMNE POV

As if fighting Ketheric wasn't bad enough, but as we finally got him down to his last stitches of strength. With Nightsong at our side, and his blood on our blades, we were met with the awful truth of this being only one part of our battle. His yellowed eyes glared out at us, blamed us, cursed us. And he let himself be taken. Into those strange green mists, he fell, and back out came a horrible sight. Myrkul. Or at least, a representation of him. Death radiated from his bones, his voice crawled through our minds, his threats stuttering our hearts. And another fight had begun.

Each swipe of his great scythe set my very soul on edge. A cut from that would not only pierce flesh deeply, it would strike much deeper. The stench of decay only got worse the longer the fight went on, and I could see it hitting against Astarion with each of his attempted steadying breaths. This place, this thing was a huge part of his fears. Decay. To rot away. There was no telling how this might be affecting his head right now. I just hoped he could keep his blades steady.

After all, we were winning.

As a team, a unit, a family, we attacked and chipped Myrkul's hide down. Bit by bit his outrage grew, and his power waned. Aylin raged against the behemoth, her wings beating hard against the stink of the cavern, and her attack's light keeping us all on the path to a win. We could do this. We had to be close.

Karlach cried out and ducked, clutching her arm. Gale protected her, and Shadowheart stepped into her place. Lae'zel gave a scream of fury and swung with her blade, another great hit ringing out against the cavern's walls. I'd given plenty of hits myself, my blades shivering in my hands from all the strikes and parries. And Astarion fought on as well. His arrows, the many kinds we had picked up along the way, were worth their weight in gold as he fired over and over, pitting against that ancient beast over and over. An onslaught that seemed to have no end, his burgundy eyes shining with determination and even a little glee.

But of course. That also made him a target.

As the Death God before us waned, it became frantic, panicked in its attacks and harder to predict. But when it happened, the whole group lurched. We all knew what had happened, before we even saw it. Astarion cried out. The huge serrated blade of Myrkul was buried in his gut. It had gone straight through.

Shit!

We all lost our minds a little bit I think. A blur of fury is the only way I could describe it, our attacks coming faster, harder, and striking that bit deeper. Karlach rallied, her skin blistering hot as her barbarian side took over and her cries rallied the rest of us. To put it lightly, we went feral.

Myrkul was overwhelmed.

Bastard.

Finally he was dying, falling into the abyss he had crawled out of, howling to the winds as the power holding him together waned. And as those swirling mists descended, revealing the hollowed form of Ketheric left behind. We felt a thrill of victory. He was dead. Left empty and abandoned by another god for his failings. Good. And then the last traces of Myrkul faded, including his blade.

Gone. We had won.

Astarion wavered, the blade dissipating to nothing, but the wound in his belly open and spilling precious blood. Shit. I ran to him, ignoring the others cries of caution. It didn't matter. Any second he could bleed out from a wound like that, or worse, the necrotic damage could drag him under, or gods knew what was happening to him. It wasn't like being stabbed by the Avatar of a God of Death was a normal wound, was it?

Astarion sunk to his knees, clasping the wound as the blood poured and darkened his armour, his expression blank. No doubt the shock ripped away most of what was happening. At least, I hoped. As he slumped backwards, about to land hard, I lunged, caught him and cradled him in my lap. Already he was like ice. He normally didn't feel overly warm, of course, but this was different. Like fresh snow.

"I've got you. I-I've got you."

He choked, blood seeping from the corner of his mouth as he looked up at me with wide eyes. "They didn't… work."

"What?" I looked at the empty potion bottles. Ice trickled along my spine.

He'd already drank his healing potions, but it wasn't working. I stared at the angry wound, but it wasn't sealing up. Nothing was happening. A couple bruises along his cheekbone faded, but nothing like they should have been, and the major wound was unaffected.

"Shadowheart! Halsin!" I yelled, holding Astarion tighter as he blinked slow. "The potion's aren't working, why're they not working?"

Halsin knelt and held his hand over the wound, recoiling after. "The necrosis, it's too advanced for the potion to–"

"Heal him." I begged, well aware of how hysterical I sounded, but I didn't care.

Dignity be damned. Panic was ruling me, crushing me. Not now. Not so soon. I wasn't ready to say goodbye. My tears were welling up as my panic peaked – the walls around us were groaning. Something had changed in the chamber. Something had become unstable.

Halsin nodded and a light emitted from his hand for a moment, before guttering to nothing. He winced and hunched slightly. "Ghn… I'm sorry, my magic is spent after the fight. Shadowheart?"

"S-Same." She shook her head, eyes wide with regret, her hands shaking in front of her. "I'm so sorry, I've got nothing but potions left."

"No…" I choked. "But–"

"We have to move." She said, gritting her teeth. "This place is going to collapse. The portal's over here, but can he be moved?"

"He has to be. Halsin can you carry him? Halsin!" I cried out, the large Elf slumping to the side, his own wounds having drained him of all strength. My heart lurched. "No. No, fuck that, this isn't how this is happening."

I tried to think, and then saw how the blood ran down Astarion's chin and dripped onto his collar beneath. Blackened veins spidered their way up his throat, infecting him by the second. He had to be so afraid. He said one of his biggest fears was decay. How do I stop it? How do I… Blood. His blood. Blood! Of course.

"Drink my blood." I gasped. "Would that work?"

Astarion frowned, eyes growing glassier. "... don't know…"

"Try." I held my wrist up and he pursed his lips. "What's wrong?"

He choked again and wheezed. "C-Can't be direct. Can't… stop myself… I'd kill you."

"Fuck." I grabbed one of the bottles, raked my arm open with my blade and gathered some blood in the vial. Another rumble ran through the ground and Shadowheart stumbled, trying to prop up Halsin. But he was too big for her to move. I got the vial a third filled and held it to Astarion's lips. "Here, drink!"

Astarion took a gulp. The effect was immediate. A little colour returned to his cheeks, his breathing evened out. It wasn't anywhere near enough, but clearly the blood worked. And his eyes burned. His teeth bared for a moment, breaths panting and body jolting as if he wanted to run somewhere. Or at someone. I held him steady as the thunder came again and the ground trembled under us.

"Shit." I looked around. "This place is going to collapse. We need to move."

"He needs more blood now." Halsin rasped, potioned by Shadowheart but far from recovered. "He's fading."

It was true, despite the sudden surge of strength, Astarion was fading again. It had been enough to prove a point, but not much else. He was going limp in my arms. That small jolt of like guttering like a candle in a gale. Damn it. No. He was slipping away and I was right there just watching. I knew so little of my life, but what I did know was that I wanted him in it. Whatever the hells that meant.

"Fine." I raised my wrist again but another rumble came and we were sent sprawling. Shit. We had to move. "Gale can you teleport us to–"

"Gale's out." Karlach yelled, the Wizard in question currently slung over her shoulder unconscious, wrapped in a protective blanket for her heat.

I trembled.

We had seconds to figure this out. They had to get out, the rest of them, I couldn't carry Astarion after the fight, my ribs were already burning from lunging over here, probably broken. And who knew what else. Nightsong had to carry Halsin, she was the only one that could. Lae'zel could barely stand, using her sword as a crutch. We were stuck. Totally stuck.

"Just re…" Astarion groaned and gripped my hand. "Just revivify m–"

"I'm not risking that. You're dying from a wound from a Death God. I do not fucking doubt that magic has some bullshit loophole for such things. And you're technically undead. Do those scrolls even work on you?"

He blinked slow and failed to find words.

My tears fell and I looked to my arm as it wept blood. It was like time slowed. The cavern was crumbling around us, we would be buried any second if we didn't get to the portal, and if we chanced leaving Astarion behind to revivify him instead, my heart ached at the idea it simply might not work due to bullshit smallprint. I wasn't losing him to that.

No. He might have some bullshit smallprint but I didn't…

I could be revived.

Easily.

I set Astarion down and dived into my pack, bringing out my Revivify scroll and handing it to Shadowheart, and keeping another scroll for myself at the same time. She blinked at me. She looked at the second scroll. Not a revivify one, something else entirely.

She went wide eyed. "No, you can't–"

"Rest up and come back to find us once you have your magic replenished." I gasped, readying myself for the spell. "He can drain me, heal, and then you can revivify me later. If he has the scroll he'll do it too soon, and I'll no doubt need your healing when brought back. No one has to die. This is just in case. And I can maintain this scroll spell long enough for the debris to settle and not crush us. It'll work!"

Astarion frowned. "N-No… Can't. Please… I'll… K-Kill… You…"

"I'm not watching you die." I snapped and looked up at Shadowheart, who looked tempted to rip the other scroll from my hand in all honesty. "Trust me." I begged and she winced.

One second.

Another rumble.

Debris crashed nearby and I shielded Astarion from the dust.

"Fuck!" Shadowheart snarled. "Fine. You better be alright after this, you hear me? Or you're getting such a slap."

"Yes Ma'am." I laughed through my tears, turning back to the scroll and activating it. "Come back for us as soon as you can! Be safe!"

Commotion followed Shadowheart and Nightsong to the portal. No one was pleased about this, and I know I heard Karlach kick off as the thunder roared around me. Halsin had objected as well, but he was spent, being able to only reach for us as he was dragged away. Go. Be safe. Please. That fight had driven us all to our limit, and we were spent. They all were. And as the golden light of the scroll's spell took over the area around us, and partially beneath us, I breathed a little easier. I hoped the Globe of Invulnerability lived up to its name…

And now the hard part.

The group were gone, the walls were tumbling on top of us, and already rocks had begun to pile up around the orb, wedging us into a small cavern of our own making. Well, my own making. But this would work, it had to work, because I wasn't ready to say goodbye to any of them yet. Least of all Astarion. And even with that, I wasn't quite ready to admit why. Pathetic, I suppose.

He was even paler than before, the wound oozing blackened blood, his whole frame trembling with shock.

Panting hard, he glared up at me blearily. "Don't."

"Astario–"

"Don't… You fucking… Dare…"

"I'm not going to force you." I spoke, voice thick with my tears, the thunder now dulled around us thanks to the orb, but my own heartbeat so loud all the same. "I'd never force anything on you, you know that."

He blinked hard, wavering under my look of desperation. But he held firm and swallowed. "Then… This was… Pointless. I'm not–"

"You're dying." I sobbed and spoke between my teeth. "My blood can heal you, we know that for sure. And I can definitely be revived later. We know that too. This will work. You might not even kill me, you might–"

"I won't be able to control it!" He snarled, awake for that moment of lucidity before his eyes rolled back and he continued panting like before. Fevered sweat dewed his brow, the blackened veins creeping towards his eyes. "I'll kill you. I know it… The blood will t-take over. I can't do that. Not to you… Not again."

"And I can't lose you, Astarion." I sniffed, leaning over him, putting my hand to his cheek to make him look at me and waiting until his eyes focused. "There's too much still to do, right? It's not ending like this. Not after everything. I… I still have to…" I swallowed hard and took the coward's way out. "I still have to pay you back for that night my darkness took over, remember?"

He nodded, eyes knowing I had meant something far more weighted.

I gritted my teeth. "You don't have long. Moments, probably. I'm asking you to do this, begging you to trust me, to take this chance and live. Please. You still have to destroy Cazador, stop his madness, and beyond that you still have your freedom to fucking enjoy. Please. Let me do this for you. Trust me."

It was like it had been me that stabbed him, the pain in his eyes as he looked at me. Another wave of agony rushed over him, splintering his expression, weaker than before. Always weaker.

He gasped. "You r-really think… It's the only w-way?"

"Yes. I'm not suddenly into death-kinks." I laughed thickly and shook my head, my tears falling against his cheek. "Do it, please. Drink my blood, heal, and reach out with your tadpole in a few hours. Once they've rested, they'll be able to come back for us. I know it. I trust that. Can you? Can y-you trust me?"

He frowned and looked at my wrist as I held it out to him, his pupils already dilating and I hoped it was because of the smell of blood, not him stepping through a door I couldn't follow.

Then he took my arm in his shaky grip and pulled it towards his lips. "Alright, Little One… I trust you."

"Thank you." I laughed and sobbed in equal measure, wincing as he bit down and feeling the immediate drain on my system.

He drank deeply. One gulp, two. The black of his eyes almost entirely enveloped the ruby before they closed and he frowned in concentration. Gulp. Gulp. Slow, deep, draining. The necrosis faded from his wound. So slowly. It had been so deep, so thorough. His whole system had been ravaged by it, and yet he had been lying there, quietly dying. The fool. More draws on my system, that strange pulling sensation against my being. Sh-Shit. My vision wavered and a chill ran along my skin. He kept drinking. He held my wrist tighter and groaned in desperation. His eyes flashed open. No reason. Only hunger. Only the animal instinct that dragged fangs through his gums and hid him from the sun for two hundred years. Shit. His grip on my wrist tightened again.

"Gah!" I cried out as the bone gave way.

A growl came next and he curled around my wrist like a stray cat might a meal, as if frightened someone might steal it. I tried to reach with my other arm, to soothe him or something. But I couldn't move. In fact, I was slumping to the side already. My vision swam again and my breathing thinned. Shit it was so fast. It can't have been more than thirty seconds, but he was draining me. He sat up, he pulled me into his lap and kept drinking, holding me close but with no affection to be found. I was simply a meal to be eaten. To be possessed. I tried to look. To implore him somehow. I accepted this might happen but knew he would still hate himself if it did. But it was no use. I was going numb, my lips could only gasp at the air with failing success, my eyes getting heavy.

And then I felt his tears.

And then I heard his muffled pleas as he continued to drink

"Please… No, I don't want this–Ngh. Shit. Stop. I can't… Nngh. Little one, please. Don't–" He kept tripping over his own voice, still clinging to my broken wrist, his tears falling thick and fast against my upturned face as he drank. "I have to stop, I have to–"

When had my eyes closed?

The concentration of the spell wavered, but I pulled my focus there. Don't drop it until you have to. Or else this really is for nothing.

He panted, and the grip on my wrist loosened a little. "St-Stop you bastard. Please. Stop." He begged with himself, another long sip following. Another sob. "N-No. It's enough. I've had enough. Stop now. You're going to fucking kill her, you shit."

I tried to reach him. "As… tar…"

Another sip.

Another sob.

"S'okay…" I mumbled, and he gave another growl before finally his lips were ripped away from my skin.

He panted hard and for a few moments, I was sure it was a coin toss on whether he would simply pick my wrist back up and drain me dry. But I had accepted that. This was an impossible situation for anyone. And he had been half dead. More than that. The fact he had managed to pause was incredible.

My wrist was then cradled, and quivering lips were pressed to my palm. "Shit… Shit it really worked. Ugh still hurts but damn, I'm not dying. You were right, you hear me? Come on you have to gloat. You have to jump up and down and obnoxiously tell me you told me so."

I tried to smile. But my own wounds ached, my own injuries making themselves known. Broken ribs. Probably some internal bleeding as well. Bugger… Dammit… Was shock going to take me instead? He hadn't drained me. But now the rest of what had happened was catching up… Well… Shit… Now I felt like an arse.

"Little one?" He asked, sounding so afraid as a touch caressed along my cheekbone.

The spell waned in my mind, but I held tight. I was so tired, so fucking tired…

"Damn it don't you die. We can revivify you, I know, but I don't want to know what that does to a person. To be beyond the veil like that and then shoved back into life. Don't go there, please. Stay here, with me. Keep this orb thing going and wait it out. Alright?"

Again, I tried to respond.

But the coldness was in my bones and leeching into everything else. So tired. So heavy. So hollow. My breaths wheezed, the pain in my broken ribs blazed, the air thinning to the point that my lungs burned. My heart stuttered. So weak. So heavy. So tired.

He cradled me closer, head nuzzled into the crook of my neck. "No. No, please, this isn't right. I know it was technically the plan, but I don't care. Don't leave me. Don't you dare go where I can't bloody follow you to tell you off. Not now. Not when I haven't said… When I haven't… I…"

Was he still speaking?

My world grew fuzzy around the edges and a few bits of dirt fell down against my face. Someone hovered over me, protecting me? His voice came through clearer after that, right by my ear.

"It's holding, darling. The debris is wedged. You… Y-You did it. You brilliant thing you. Shit you're hardly here anymore, you're fading, aren't you? That heart is barely beating. Damn it. You better come back, you better find your way when we come calling, you hear me? You can't just make this your grand exit. I refuse it. Hear me? You beautiful, stubborn, idiot."

I heard him.

And I hoped his refusal was enough…

Thanks for reading!