A/N: Merry Christmas! Enjoy the holidays with your loved ones :)
After recounting what happened during basic training, Olivia recounted how Holly saved her from the grenade that killed two Marines from the Delta-team. After that, nobody said anything for a long time.
Ellen's thoughts jumped wildly back and forth. She felt so sorry for Olivia and felt guilty that none of them had been persistent enough to get her to tell them what was wrong. Of course, they knew she'd missed a few days of training. But she had written to them that she just had a little flu and was in the infirmary. She didn't want them to visit her to avoid contagion.
On the other hand, Ellen wondered how what she had just heard affected her opinion of Holly. She had thought of her as a capable team member and found her nice, but that had suddenly changed.
"Please don't tell the others about this. I'm not proud of any of that," Olivia said, staring at her feet.
Ellen sighed. "Do not worry. Tell them yourself when you're ready."
"Thanks."
"I'll leave you alone with the subject, but I have one question," Ellen said, looking at her carefully. "Why do you think you have no business with the Alliance?"
Olivia sighed. "Even before basic training, I knew that I was only chasing you because I didn't want to be alone. You're all I have left of family. But is something like that really enough to have what it takes to be a Marine? You all have goals or at least a talent for something needed in the Alliance. You and Norah are definitely going to have careers. Lauren is dying to go to medical school and Alex has broken all the target shooting records at our camp. But what about me? I feel like a stupid girl who only plays war because her childhood friends do it."
"You're not stupid," Ellen replied, trying to put on an encouraging smile. "And you didn't just run after us either. Don't you remember that you always wanted to get off the earth to see other worlds? Or that your eyes lit up when Alex's brother told us about his missions? You may not realize it, but I don't think you really wanted to do anything else in your life. You just haven't figured out where you want to go yet, but your journey is just beginning."
Olivia pursed her lips. "I don't think that's enough."
Ellen put a hand on her right shoulder and forced her to look into her eyes. "Oliv, you are intelligent and obviously have an incredible amount of strength in you, otherwise you would not have endured the training. I'm sure you'll find a job here. The uniform fits you perfectly."
"If you say so," Olivia said, her expression still sad, but Ellen had a feeling her friend sounded at least a little less desolate. That was enough for her for now.
Ellen went to the door. "Come on, the funeral service is about to start and we should get changed first."
Holly was already waiting for her on the other side of the door. She smiled uncertainly at Ellen, but the corners of her mouth turned down when she saw Olivia behind her.
"I'll leave," Olivia said, pushing past them.
Ellen paused and eyed Holly critically, who had paled a little and was staring down at her boots, very guilty and ashamed. She seemed to suspect that Olivia had told her everything.
"There are vacancies on the Delta team. I want you to go to the officers and tell them you're going to switch teams. You're no longer needed in the Betas," Ellen said firmly, not looking directly at Holly. She wasn't going to blame her for what had happened, but she couldn't completely ignore it either. She knew that this was an impulsive reaction, but she wanted to show Olivia that has her back.
She stomped past Holly with firm steps, leaving her alone in the hallway.
"Private 2nd Class Julian Rapone and Private 2nd Class Zayn Gertz were two brave Marines from the 231st Platoon's Delta-Team who gave their lives to protect other people. Remember them as heroes," Commander Lance said, while an Alliance flag was placed on each of the two coffins behind him. Standing in her dress uniform with her team in the back row, Ellen could hardly see what was happening, but she knew from her mother's stories what the procedure was like. After the speeches, the coffins would be loaded onto a shuttle and flown to the nearest base for transportation back to their families.
"Don't you dare come back home like that," Maya had warned her daughter. Ellen couldn't imagine how Rapone's and Gertz's relatives would feel when they received the bodies of the men.
"May they rest in peace. Private 1st Class Chappel, step forward and address your comrades," the commander called, stepping aside. He was replaced by Lloyd Chappel, a square-faced man with serious eyes. Ellen had hardly talked to him during basic training because he was a rather quiet fellow, but he struck her as a good guy.
"Julian and Zayn were more than just pals. They were like brothers to me during basic training. We encouraged each other and when I got promoted they were as happy for me as if they had been promoted themselves. I mourn their deaths very much and hope their families will find comfort in knowing that their sons died heroes." After the short speech, a couple of Marines from the other platoon stepped forward and carried the coffins to the open shuttle. A slow silence hung over Platoon 231 as the hatch closed. Ellen swallowed hard. She would not forget this sight.
As the hangar opened and Julian Rapone's and Zayn Gertz's final journey began, neither Marine said a word. Everyone watched the shuttle disappear and saluted. Finally, after the hangar was closed, Commander Lance spoke again.
"There are a few drinks ready for all of you in the mess hall. Remember the dead and toast to them so that tomorrow the pain is forgotten and we can look forward again. You can step away."
Ellen snorted. She doubted that the thought of the gap the two left would be easily forgotten with alcohol, but the Commander was right. The next mission could already be awaiting them tomorrow and then they were no longer allowed to mourn for the dead, but had to concentrate on the living.
The group broke up and because Ellen didn't feel like going to the mess hall and maybe having to talk to Holly, she decided to stretch her legs and go for a walk on the ship.
After the other Marines disappeared upstairs, she waited for a lift and rode to the engineering deck. Instead of heading in the direction of the infirmary, she turned right and sauntered down the corridor. There were hardly any doors here, and when she had gone a good distance her path curved to the right. She stopped in amazement when she discovered the core of the Rome's drive behind a large pane. It was barely two meters across and shone with a blindingly bright light created by the element zero being burned as fuel.
"Beautiful, isn't it?" someone said near her and Ellen turned around, startled. Norah stepped out of the hallway on the other side and also studied the core.
Ellen looked at her questioningly. "Why aren't you upstairs in the mess hall?"
"I didn't feel like company."
"Should I go?"
She shook her head. "No, please stay."
Norah leaned against the wall next to the pane and sank to the floor.
"Is everything okay?" Ellen asked worriedly and sat down next to her. Olivia didn't seem to be the only one having problems.
"I don't know," Norah replied with a shrug. "I killed someone for the first time today, and I don't know how I feel about it." Her voice was thick, like she was about to cry. Ellen had never seen her like this, because even though Norah had grown up in a very difficult household, she had barely shown it or shed tears.
"Do you want to talk about what happened?" Ellen asked.
"We were just at the foothills of the colony on Amaterasu when the first of the pirates came towards us. But the other squad of marines from the Rome mowed them down before we even aimed at them. I was ordered to secure the surrounding buildings with my team so that nobody could surprise us from behind as we advanced. In one of them I caught one of the pirates trying to take several colonists hostage. I surprised him from behind and told him to drop his gun, but he wouldn't listen. After some shots from my assault rifle, he lay on the ground and didn't move anymore. I know, he got what he probably deserved, but I still feel... weird."
Ellen understood why she felt this way. They were not emotionless robots, but sentient and thinking beings. The idea of taking the life of another human or alien had bothered her even before she finally applied for the Alliance, but after long discussions with her mother, her doubts were slowly allayed.
"My mother once told me," Ellen began, "that the Alliance doesn't tell you to kill for no reason. Our most important task is to protect the people who cannot defend themselves. And sometimes the death of others is inevitable."
Norah didn't reply, so Ellen grabbed one of her hands and just kept talking.
"It's only human that you feel this way, but you mustn't think about it too much or you'll break it," Ellen said almost energetically. Instead of saying anything, Norah just squeezed her hand, and from then on they sat side by side in silence, listening to the hum of the engine core.
Two weeks later, the next mission for the SSV Rome's marines was due, but this time it was not an emergency, but a planned operation. Excitedly, Ellen sat in the conference room with her platoon, waiting for their task to be explained to them. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the commander entered the room along with LC Van Hagen and they stood and saluted.
"Sit down," he instructed her and stepped in front of the wall screen at the front while Van Hagen stood next to it in a stiff posture.
"Only Platoon 231 will do this mission today, and you'll be led by my XO. On Tiptree, a planet with one of our colonies, a small enemy base has been discovered. It is believed to be a camp for smuggling red sand, an infamous drug. Your task is to clear the base and destroy the drugs. Our enemy's estimated strength is fifteen armed men, but since we'll catch them off guard, that shouldn't be a problem." He turned to the screen and pulled up a satellite image.
"Here," he continued, marking a spot on the map, "is your destination. You will be dropped off two kilometers south of it. Once you have arrived at the camp and scouted the area, Lieutenant Commander Van Hagen will decide how the attack will proceed. Any questions?"
Alex answered. "Why are we taking care of this and not the Marines stationed on Tiptree?"
"Alex!" Norah admonished her from the side.
"No, that's a legitimate question," the Commander replied. "On the one hand, we want to prevent the colonists from becoming aware of this and thus no longer feeling safe on the planet. It would be noticeable if all the Marines went out on a mission and maybe not all came back or some were injured, and questions would be asked that they would not want to answer. This way, we also prevent investors from possibly getting wind of the matter and therefore canceling their financial means, without which such projects as the colony on Tiptree would not be possible. Prepare yourself, you are expected in the shuttles and ready for action in twenty minutes!" He had said the last words in a harsh tone of command. Ellen got up and went to the elevators with her comrades.
Once downstairs and in the armory, she carefully folded her uniform and slipped into her combat fatigues. After all the armor plates were attached, she grabbed her helmet and walked over to Van Hagen, who handed her the shield booster, her weapon and ammo. After her it was Alex's turn.
"Zhao, your file says you're quite good with the sniper rifle. Is that correct?" asked the LC.
Alex nodded confidently. "Yes, sir."
He handed her an M-92 Mantis, a sniper rifle weapon, along with a Predator pistol. "That should give us an even clearer advantage," said Van Hagen, slotting her shield booster into the appropriate slot because her hands were full and motioning for the next to come. Grinning widely, Alex looked at Ellen as they exited the armory.
"Finally someone appreciates my talents," she said cheerfully, strapping the rifle to the holster on her back and the pistol on her hip. Ellen did the same with her assault rifle and stowed her magazines.
"Don't disappoint his expectations, I've had bad experiences with that," she murmured.
"Oh El, what can go wrong? We don't have to worry about stones falling on our heads today," she replied teasingly.