Santa Tell Me

by suitsxmasfics

After Zane Specter Litt firm's New Year's Eve celebration, a selective few were invited to an afterparty at Harvey's condo and Donna ended up spending the night with him. After some turmoil, they agreed to prioritize their professional lives. But as they approached the one-year mark of their encounter, they found it increasingly difficult to shake off their complicated past.

Prompt #1 by kanthonyamor: "Beginning of the year Darvey happens to have an ons in the heat of the mom. Next day agreed "nothing happened; to move on". Harvey tries to be the player/gambler he has always being; tries to sleep w/ other women but fails, Donna same. Both frustrated. by Christmas, when Zane, Alex & Samantha tells him who's the most important person in their lives, who they're gonna spend Christmas with. He runs to Donna…surprised she was just on her way out to go to him too… (M coded; pre-canon)."

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Harvey's condo on December 31st, 2018 at 11:50 p.m.

The firm party did not go as planned; it did, however, go as many expected. Apparently, the associates weren't looking forward to ringing in the new year with their colleagues at the workplace. Most of the firm's upper management weren't surprised it happened. The general aversion to playing where you work was a common phenomenon shared by many in all fields, not just in the law, and with good reason. Having a really close-knit group, even considered family, was on the rare side of occurrences. Regardless, Louis had been determined to do something nice for the associates as he was trying to win them back at all costs. Donna warned it would be a disaster. Fortunately, Harvey listened and planned accordingly for it. Which is how some of them ended up waiting for the New York City New Year's ball-drop at his place.

Robert had his wife with him. Alex had not even shown up for the firm's celebration; the man was wise and had the perfect excuse of being out of town with his family. Samantha was accompanied by someone who was evidently way more than just the friend she introduced him as. And Louis had Sheila. The only ones without romantic companions were Donna and Harvey. Still, they had each other, and even if their status remained platonic, their unique and special bond assured that it was better than having been with anybody else in the world.

"Are we kissing at midnight? We should kiss at midnight," Sheila told Louis. Their conversation was private but loud enough that the others could hear as they sat around Harvey's living room. "We should all kiss at midnight," she said, turning around and speaking to the rest of the gathering with glee in her eyes.

Nobody objected. The Zanes were in, Laura agreeing for them, and Samantha didn't seem to acknowledge her words, consumed by her exclusive conversation.

Harvey turned to his right. "Did you hear that? They're all kissing," he said to Donna, his eyes opening wider. "Maybe we should consider—"

They had been heavily flirting nonstop for months. Since Rachel and Mike left for Seattle, every day in the office was a new opportunity for them to let their banter out of the oppressing chains they had confined it to for so long. And yes, they always had a good rapport, but it became different, more evident, and even cynical. Neither tried to hide the fact that they were interested. Charming, witty remarks dominated almost all their run-ins. They would make eyes at each other and sometimes even say the most inappropriate things for a workplace environment. They led each other on constantly. Eventually, a time would come when all of it had to culminate in something favorable or damning; something had to give.

"Maybe we should get everyone a champagne flute to toast the new year," she interjected before he could say any more. She got up from the spot next to him and waited for him to do the same, but he was just looking at her with an astounded expression. "Come on, Specter, this is your place. Be a good host," she razzed him, coaching him up from the sofa.

He stood up, headed to the open kitchen area, and followed her behind the counter. She immediately grabbed a champagne bottle to unwrap the foil and wire cage, passing it to him to pop the cork and arranging a neat line of flutes to be filled with the light, bubbling liquid.

"Mmmm." Harvey was looking to get her attention before asking, "This was an excuse so the others wouldn't hear, or you really don't want to kiss at midnight?" The cork came right off, making a popping sound just as he finished his question.

She gazed at him softly, smiling as she put forward a few glasses for him to fill with champagne, trying to decide how serious he was about it. "Let them kiss," she said, looking over their chatty friends a few feet away. "They're couples. They get to do that."

"So, we'll just be staring at them," he sounded put off by the prospect.

"Nobody here is drunk enough not to make a big deal if you and I shared a kiss," she told him as they continued their task. "Is that really how you want to start the new year?"

His signature smirk was on. "I wouldn't mind," he said, shrugging. "And I'm sure some of them drank enough to not care. Sheila seems drunk," he said, indicating with his eyes at some crazy things she and Louis were doing in a corner, but maybe that was just how they danced; it was difficult to tell.

"Funny," Donna said with a little laugh. "Sheila is the only one who's not drinking," she assured him, indicating she knew more than she was saying.

"She's not?" He wondered, confused. Harvey would swear she was drunk, or at least she was acting like it. He shook his head, not caring enough to give it more thought.

"Let's pass these around," she said, grabbing a few of the filled flutes. "It's almost midnight."

They left the kitchen, and the one-minute countdown had already started on the big flat-screen TV Harvey had rolled out for the occasion. Everyone was given a drink by the time the last ten seconds started to be chimed out loud by all.

"10 - 9 - 8 - 7 - 6 - 5 - 4 - 3 - 2 - 1." Excitedly: "Happy New Year!"

The night sky lit up with colorful fireworks, and the crystal windows reflected the intermittent brightness inside the cozy space. The couples locked lips, most just for a short and simple moment. Afterward, they were all smiles and joy, wishing for a happy new beginning.

As that happened, Donna and Harvey shared the ultimate intimate smile—it could put every single New Year's kiss to shame. They didn't even pay attention to their friends; they were too busy staring at each other. Evidently, they wanted to do more than that, but they contained themselves. Instead, they decided to go for the safe choice, getting closer and embracing carefully since they still carried their own champagne glasses.

Tightening his free arm around her, "Happy New Year, Donna." Harvey said very close to her ear. Softly breathing in the scent of her shampoo.

"Happy New Year, Harvey." She let her hand quickly and gently brush the short hairs at the nape of his neck.

They separated when their friends demanded their attention. They clinked their flutes together as a group, toasting and drinking some sparkling magic to an excellent and better year ahead.

Within the hour, couple after couple said their goodbyes and went home. Only Donna stayed behind. Harvey had taken out an expensive bottle of scotch and insisted they had to toast with it, just the two of them to welcome in 2019 correctly, not with the soft and foamy grape juice.

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Harvey's condo on January 1st, 2019 at 2:34 a.m.

"Remember the time Big Bertha told him off? I mean, this huge man, double her size, stumbled back and almost fell right off his own two feet," she laughed.

They sat on the long sofa, facing each other and holding a tumbler in their hands. The penthouse lights were dimmed, and it was partly quiet, with only soft jazz music in the background as they reminisced and giggled with every memory they pulled from their conversation.

"Yes!" He exclaimed, his mind rediscovering that moment. "That woman always scared me," he added with soft laughter.

"She scared everyone and didn't like anybody," Donna affirmed.

"She liked you," he pointed out, and Donna looked apprehensive.

"She tolerated me," she scuffed. "I wouldn't say she liked me."

"In her own way, she did," he assured her. "And who could blame her. I mean, it's you," he said with a waving gesture of his free hand.

She rolled her eyes. "Not everyone likes me, Harvey," she corrected him. "I'm awesome, but I also know how to piss people off. I promise you."

The countless drinks they've had were starting to be noticeable in the paths their conversations took, starting somewhere and turning into something completely different by the end.

"Actually," she thought better of it, "that's also part of being awesome. I'm more than okay with not being liked sometimes."

"Fools," he said, bringing the tumbler to his mouth and sipping from it. "I like you," he boldly informed her, his eyes looking into hers over the rim of his glass just before he lowered it.

"I'll be worried if after thirteen years," she smiled coyly, "you didn't."

He placed the tumbler on the coffee table, and his upper body leaned forward, involuntarily getting closer to her. He wasn't going to let her downplay his words.

"I like you more with every passing day." His expression was serious about it. "You're the one person who can make my bad mood shift simply by existing and being you."

Fidgeting in her seat, she looked straight into his eyes for a few seconds and said, "I feel the same way."

In the back of her mind, an alert went off. Alchoholized or not, her visceral reaction was to get up and leave. She didn't want to be left again when that type of situation came between them. It was her turn to be the one quitting the scene.

"I think I have to go," she said, standing up and leaving her empty glass on the table before them.

"No!" he said immediately, getting up with her.

She gave him a wary look. "Harvey, it's very late."

It took him less than two seconds to come up with an excuse. "There's something I have to give you, but I haven't gotten the chance yet," he said.

"There is?" She asked, incredulous.

"Yes, your Christmas gift."

She chuckled. "Since when have you bought me anything for Christmas? Your gift to me was taken care of already."

He shook his head and couldn't help but laugh with her. Harvey had become entirely aware of his reputation as a lousy gifter, which is precisely why he wanted to surprise her on at least one occasion.

"I know, I know," he said, raising his hands in defeat. "This year, you'll just have to make the sacrifice of receiving two gifts from me."

She crossed her arms and observed him meticulously, narrowing her eyes and leaning heavily on her leg. "Alright. Where is this gift? Now, I'm intrigued."

"Come on," he said, grabbing her hand to make her follow him.

She felt lightheaded when he pulled her; maybe it was the fast movement, all the drinks, the sensation of his hand on hers, or possibly a combination of all three. The real reason escaped her.

They went the long way. Harvey didn't think beforehand and walked around the breakfast bar and through the kitchen, pausing at the other end and making her abruptly stop. That wasn't helping with the lightheadedness.

When he turned. He saw her holding on to the pristine counter.

"Everything okay?"

"Yes. I think I walked too fast," she giggled.

"Maybe you should've stayed sitting down," he said, realizing that they had been drinking far too much for way too long.

"Ummmmm. Show me what you got me."

He grinned. "Okay. Wait here," he walked the short distance to the side of his desk, retrieving a heavy paper bag from the floor and returning to her side. "I didn't have time to wrap it," he said, holding it in the same package it had gotten delivered that morning. "The truth is, I was gonna give it to you later, but we're here now," he gave her the bag, and she took it with a warm smile.

"It's heavier than I thought," she noticed.

Once she had it settled on the counter, "open it," he said, encouraging her.

She opened the bag by rolling up the top and separating the two sides that came together. Her hand reached inside and pulled out one of three bottles of wine. He was gifting alcohol again. However, he did it right this time, and it meant everything to her. It was the same one she told him about weeks ago when they shared a late night at the office. She said some things about her travels through Spain and how she had tried a magnificent wine that was the best she had ever had and hadn't found it since then. Not in New York, not in any of the wine places she visited around the country, not online, not even by entrusting the quest to a friend who lived abroad in a nearby Spanish city to the one she visited when she had that wine the one and only time.

Without looking at him yet, "Harvey," she said, concentrating on the wine label. "You got this for me?" she asked, gazing at him with the softest eyes.

He nodded, seeing her get emotional. "I'm happy you like it," he said, pleased with himself.

"Like it?" She asked rhetorically. "I love it!" She was beyond excited for the wine and because he had gotten it right. "Can we open this?" She asked about the bottle she was holding. "I want to taste it, see if it's as good as I remember."

He swallowed hard. Why did her words make him think of something entirely different? He was sick, he thought, maybe a little inebriated. Furthermore, they already drank so much and mixed. It was probably not a good idea to add a new variation to their drinks that night. Especially wine, with its reputation for a wicked hangover if consumed alongside other liquors. However, it was that particular wine, and Donna wanted to try it. The situation was unique, and he wouldn't deny her anything.

"Oh, why not? I'll open it," he said, moving around the kitchen to locate a bottle opener and two red wine glasses.

He uncorked the bottle and poured two glasses. She expertly inhaled its scent before tasting it with her eyes closed and a pleased mien on her face. She licked her lips, and he had to fight the urge to reach over and kiss her with all he had.

"Delicious," she communicated, placing the glass back on the counter. "And dare I say, far better than I remember."

He kept his cool, but her words put his mind somewhere entirely inappropriate. She kept talking about the wine; he wished she were talking about him. "I'm glad it lived up to the expectation." He had also tasted it, and had to admit, it was good wine.

"It sure did. Thank you, Harvey," she said with a big smile, taking one step and shortening the space between them to gently kiss his left cheek.

Afterward, she lingered, staying close to him, and he took advantage of the moment to hug her, wrapping both his arms around her.

Donna reciprocated the hug, allowing her head to rest on his shoulder. She felt safe, and he smelled like home.

"Shall we finish the wine?" He asked, the sound traveling from the top of her head to her ears and making her slightly shiver.

She separated from him with a short nod before retrieving her wine glass. Retreating to the breakfast stools, she sat down, and he stood. They almost finished the whole bottle within the following thirty minutes as she made him tell her everything from how he'd figured out about the family-owned vineyard, which still produced a minimal batch of wine once a year, to what he had to do to get a hold of them and get the wines shipped to the US. She hung on to every detail of what he said. Everything about it was special to her.

In between stories, the subject had changed a couple of times, and they were currently chatting about something trivial related to a case they worked on a few days ago when she laughed in the cutest way possible. He was being too comical and silly, imitating the talk of an obnoxious opposing counsel. It provoked her joy to gain enough force until a snort came out, making him laugh along with her as he continued his act.

"Enough," she said, covering her mouth to quiet down.

Still laughing, he grabbed the bottle of wine and noticed it was empty. He considered opening another, but before doing so, he was brazen enough to ask, "Are you now drunk enough to kiss me, or do I have to give you more wine?"

They were clearly drunk, and she just smiled as a response, swiftly getting off the high chair in the corner, standing in her bare feet to come before him; their proximity was unmistakable as she wedged herself to stand right in between his legs, getting to a closer eye level.

"Oh, Harvey," she said, her hands coming up to his face, touching both cheeks before pulling him down gently, their mouths insanely close. He was eager to kiss her, but she was driving the moment, and just as he was about to do it, she moved her head back slightly, only letting their lips brush against each other for an instant, which was enough for her to feel parts of him awaken. "I'm drunk enough to even blow you and then some," she said, her eyes boring into his.

"Huh," he said, taken aback for a second, his alcoholized mind trying to make sense of what she said, then quickly recovering and ready to seize the opportunity in front of him. "What's stopping you?" He asked her with the cockiest smirk.

Her heart skipped a beat. She couldn't resist him any longer. Her mouth hungrily found his to commence a crazed, passionate night that would remain in their minds long after it was over.

.

Harvey's condo on January 1st, 2019 at 10:27 a.m.

His eyes were closed shut, his eyelids heavier than he ever remembered feeling them. And his head—it was pounding. Regardless of his body aches, he still felt content. It took Harvey a minute as he came out of his sleep and into reality to remember the facts about the night before and earlier that morning. Before his eyes finally opened, a soft smile drew on his lips. He remembered—he remembered many things. The details were fuzzy, but the important aspects he was clear on.

Carefully reaching to the other side of the bed, he expected to find her there, but he only felt the soft, empty mattress and rumble sheets as his hand kept touching around. When turning, he observed what he'd already figured out; she wasn't there. He didn't allow himself to panic; she wouldn't just leave without saying anything after the night they had. He got up, shielding himself from the sun, and heading to the bathroom. It was vacant, with no traces of her. Perhaps in the kitchen, at that point, he didn't care about the light coming in through the windows bothering his eyes; he just wanted to confirm she was still there, so he sprinted out of the bedroom. Unfortunately, the result of his search was not favorable. She was nowhere. She'd left and didn't tell him.

His heart sank inside his chest. Needing to talk to her and ensure that everything was well between them, he headed back to his bedroom, found his phone, and looked to see if there was a text message or something that would indicate what was going on. Seeing nothing but meaningless Happy New Year messages from multiple people, he bypassed his lock screen and went directly to her contact, calling her. The phone rang, and eventually, the voicemail came on. He called again, and then it went straight to the recorded prompt: "I'm not here right now, so if you want me to call you back, say something interesting."

"Hey, Donna, I…" he let out a held breath. "I woke up, and you weren't here. We need to talk. Call me." Call him? He needed to see her. "Or, better yet, let me know when you're home, and I'll come over. Mmmm," he didn't know what else to say. "Just that. Bye," he said and hung up.

The second time he called, she sent him to voicemail or turned off the phone. He dwelled on it as he made his way to the kitchen for a much-needed cup of coffee. He found the wine bottles were still exactly where they left them the night before. She hadn't taken them with her, and he didn't know whether that was good or bad. After exhaling loudly, his eyes fixated on the counter and the breakfast stools, a memory from hours earlier immediately flooding his brain.

Her lips were soft, warm, and delicious. She tasted like the wine they'd been drinking; a rich and dark grape flavor with hints of chocolate and something woody. The timing hadn't been right the last time they had kissed; it was an unexpected surprise to him, and even more shocking was his reaction to it and how much it had affected him. However, he didn't feel guilty about wanting her and enjoying himself this time. Allowing his mind to go numb, releasing years of suppressed feelings, everything around him melted away as he lost himself in her warmth, his hands sinking into her silky, red hair to hold her steady, deepening the kiss and caressing her tongue with his. They became breathless as their repressed longing turned into a more passionate kiss than they could stand.

Averting his lips from hers, he refused to let go completely, deciding to recover his breath while still kissing where he could. His mouth adored her checks and the commissure of her lips as she panted for air, holding on to his hair, her fingers brushing and softly pulling at it. With one of his legs wedged in between hers, she rubbed herself on his upper thigh, grinding through their clothes as his hot breath made a trail down her throat, and his hands were busy striping her of her silver dress. Once he got it to loosen, she stretched out her arms, letting it fall to the floor. He stepped back, taking a minute to scan her and engrave her stunning beauty into his mind; her body was a work of art, and he couldn't believe that he was lucky enough to appreciate it for a second time.

She allowed him his fun for a few more seconds but eventually grabbed the end of his gray tie to pull him toward her. Harvey laughed and went directly to resume his work, kissing around the base of her neck, nibbling at her collarbone with enthusiastic energy. His mouth was sloppy as he descended down the valley of her breast while his hands were itching to get her bra off. He twiddled with it at her back, trying to locate the clasp without luck.

He heard her giggling and raised his head to discover what amused her. "What are you doing?" She asked him, suppressing her laughter.

"What?" He was confused. Wasn't what he was doing obvious?

"It's a front clasp," she said, and it all made sense.

Bringing her hands to the middle of her chest, she quickly unclasped her brassiere, pulling aside the cups that together held up her breasts; it released the tension, allowing her boobs to naturally sway their own way. His eyes were probably pooping out of its suckets with the unbelievable, magnificent sight. What a neat bra trick, he thought, loving it. But he loved it even more when she discarded the garment on the floor. His head quickly sank lower, fondling his face on her soft, pillowy flesh.

He took one of her nipples into his mouth and hurriedly suctioned it, eliciting a moan from her that made him suck even harder. While starting to use his teeth to grace it, his other hand ventured to find her other boob, letting the weight of it rest on his palm before massaging it with care and softly caressing the delicate skin around the hardened pink bud. Once again, he fiercely sucked the nub surrounded by his lips as he pinched the other one, making her whimper as she pressed down on his head so he wouldn't stop.

Harvey shook his head when he heard a distinctive noise, the product of a new message on his phone. Rapidly, he moved around the counter, going directly for his phone on top of the coffee table. There was a new text message from Donna. He saw it and read some from the locked screen: Hi, Harvey. Earlier, when I left, you were still sleeping. I didn't…

He promptly bypassed the lock screen, going to his message app to finish reading what she wrote:

Hi, Harvey.

When I left earlier, you were still sleeping. I didn't want to wake you. Everything is okay. I'm taking care of things, don't worry. I might need to take a few days off, though, because something personal has come up. I will be in touch. Don't worry. See you in a few days.

Taking care of things? What the hell did that even mean? And something personal sounded like code for distance from him. It didn't feel right; Harvey knew it the minute he realized she wasn't there when he woke up, but now he was sure. Donna probably regretted their time together and needed space to figure out how to let him down with ease. Well, Fuck. Him. That's not what he expected at all. Things turned out to be the worst possible outcome of all the horrible scenarios he had imagined over the years if he and Donna ever got too close again. If he could have foreseen this, he wouldn't have risked it. He would never have risked not having her, at least as a friend. It had to be fixed. He had to let her know he was more than okay with everything going back to the way it was before they drank so much. That, he would call it a drunken mistake if he had to. He would lie to her. He didn't like it, but he would certainly do it for them—for her.

.

Donna's parents' home, Connecticut on January 5th, 2019 at 7:46 p.m.

It had been days since the New Year, and her head was still not at ease. She was excited and terrified in partly the same measure. Afraid of his reaction if it turned out to be real, yet enthusiastic since she had already come to terms with the fact that being pregnant was something she might actually want. Although, it wasn't something she had even considered until the morning of the first. Everything happened too fast, and they hadn't planned any of it, which is what occurs when decisions are made on impulse and, most of all, by cognitively impaired people. Okay, maybe not "impaired"; she understood what she was getting herself into, and she would probably do it again if given the chance. That night had been everything. The real dilemma started when she woke up and faced the reality of what they had done and what she needed to do next.

They had sex. They had a lot of unprotected sex.

As a karmic joke, Harvey had run out of preservatives, and she hadn't been on the pill for months. It had posed an intriguing choice for them to make, she remembered, and, as stupid as it was, they forwent the rational part of their brain, letting their drunk selves take over, and decided to do something that not even her young self would've been down for. She was an adult, and still, she—

Her mind drifted to that memory.

All the sensations he was evoking in her body were heavenly. His mouth and hand were doing things to her boobs that made it impossible for her not to be vocal and express her approval. While most of the action took place on her upper body, her arousal was increasing between her legs, like an electric pull running straight down, directly to her core. It made it challenging to keep still, so she rubbed her thighs together for friction, but it was not enough. Her hand found his trousers' fastener with clear intentions.

"Harvey," she nearly purred. "I'm so naked."

"Not nearly enough," he complained, talking with his lips around her nipple, creating vibrations with every word.

His hands moved south, finding the hem of her panties and trying to lower them.

"No, I mean," she intended to clarify as her hands made shady work removing his pants. "It's not fair. You're overdressed." She felt him chuckle around, the sound against her stimulated skin sending shivers straight to her core.

"Fine," he said, reluctantly separating from her.

Going straight to the tie knot, he loosened it as she stepped back to observe how he undressed for her. Without realizing it, her teeth sank into her lower lip while he quickly removed his white button-down shirt. The reveal of his broad torso and arms made her smile wickedly. He huffed a small laugh as a result, and she just wanted to lunge herself at him, but she could be patient, she thought, so she waited, pressing her legs together, and then he started to lower his pants.

Her eyes fixated on his lower body, rightfully ogling him as he freed his erection. She didn't want to waste any time, and as he got rid of his pants and shoes, she slipped her underwear past her bare feet; her heels had come off long ago when they first started with the wine.

They were both naked, staring at each other, and the furthest thing from their minds was any more foreplay. Walking forward simultaneously, they eliminated the short distance created to undress. Their lips merged, passionately kissing, her arms looping around his head and his holding her closer. She could feel his prominent erection in between their bodies, and she was desperate to feel him inside of her.

Pulling apart and breathing harshly, "you need to get a condom," she informed him.

His expression went sour. "Shit," he said, closing his eyes in annoyance with himself. "I don't have any. I've been forgetting to buy some." She knew he hadn't been seeing anyone for a long while, purchasing preservatives was probably not something he was worrying about too much.

"I'm not on the pill," she clarified, letting a frustrated sigh escape her. "What do we do?" She asked him, looking directly into his eyes.

Harvey took less than a second to answer. "Pull out?"

"Pull out?" She sounded incredulous.

"Yes. I won't come," he said, sounding convinced. "I'll just pull out before it happens."

Her hand around his neck started to caress the hairs at his nape. "Does that even work? Can you even manage it?"

"I'll do it," he promised her, lowering his head and kissing her softly for a few seconds while moving his pelvis closer to her center, the head of his cock pressing against her sensitive flesh and creating agonizing friction, thus letting her taste and feel a bit of what awaited them. Then he released her lips slowly, "What else is there? Because I'm not letting you go."

She smiled and disregarded all the warning thoughts her brain was trying to push on her. She raised her leg until he caught it and secured it around his hip, and without a second thought, "Do it," she said.

Holding her under thigh with one hand, he made sure they had the proper leverage until his back leaned against the counter, and his other hand grabbed his erection to guide it through her folds. Her warm wetness covered him whole as he pushed inside of her with a slow but constant rhythm that was intoxicating and perfect. Her mouth was shaped like a big O that he itched to kiss and did as he finished pushing in, stopping only when he couldn't get any deeper.

She took a pillow from her bed and covered her face with it, the memory of that night always too intense.

Needless to say, some time during their rigorous activities, he had ejaculated inside of her. And even if he hadn't, as a conscious, responsible adult with a proper knowledge of how sex works, she knew the risks of pregnancy didn't just disappear if someone 'pulled out.' The only reasonable thing to do in a situation like that was to take preventive measures, even if it was after the fact. And that is what she'd tried to do.

When she woke up the morning of the first, she was beside herself with joy. Harvey was next to her, breathing heavily with a content smile as he slept. Then she remembered detail after detail, and going to a pharmacy became her only priority.

Her initial plan was to leave and return quickly enough that he wouldn't realize she'd been gone. However, once she found herself with the morning-after pill in her hands, everything changed. It was not what she expected at all. None of it was rational. She knew well that it was just a higher dose of the same ingredients in the contraceptive pills she had taken for years; it would do the same thing, delay ovulation to block a hypothetical pregnancy. Only a preventive measure and nothing more. Yet, she reconciled that she would not bring herself to take it.

And how was she supposed to explain it to Harvey when she couldn't even explain it to herself? Anybody would be furious; she certainly would.

Standing right outside his building, she panicked when her phone rang, and it was him. Then it rang again, and she couldn't deal with any of it, so she sent him to voicemail. The mere thought of trying to explain that she was willing to risk a pregnancy, without even consulting him, made her anxious. She had only realized she wanted it less than 30 minutes ago. She never placed high importance on becoming a mother, but the prospect of a child that was theirs, Harvey's and hers, had her ready to do insane things. A baby. With Harvey. What was crazy was that she was prepared not to let him participate in the decision, which scared her to death.

Her phone had beeped, indicating she had a new voicemail. It was from him. She listened to it and immediately heard the distress in his voice. Her mind, wrapped around the possibility of a pregnancy and eventually a baby, led her to think that his worry was solely about that glitch and not her or even what their night together would mean moving forward.

In that instant, Donna decided that she would need time away to think things through and prepare herself for what would happen if she ended up getting pregnant. It was just and if, nonetheless, the possibility existed. So she texted him to give him peace of mind that the technical difficulties they had the night before would be remedied and to inform him she would take some days off work, which is how she ended up back at her parent's house for the second time in a little over a week. They were surprised to see her, and she came up with the lame excuse of missing them, given that they could only be together on Christmas day. She informed them that since it was the beginning of the year, things were slow at the firm, and she was able to spend a few days with them. She sensed they didn't believe everything she told them, but they were too happy to have her there to even question her motives.

Currently, enough days had gone by that she could try to take a pregnancy test. It was still considered premature, but she had been patient. Donna had nearly paced a hole in the floor of her parent's guest room and pondered every little outcome and possible scenario resulting from a positive test. In a way, it felt like she had waited nine months already and was ready to give birth to the supposed child. So, even when it would be just six days after the act, she would wake up early in the morning to take one of the pregnancy tests she bought on her way there days before. The only reason she would wait until the morning was to allow a few more hours, increasing, however minimal, the chances of an accurate result.

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Zane Specter Litt on January 7th, 2019 at 8:13 a.m.

The first thing that caught Donna's attention as she circled her desk was a brown paper bag by the side of the file cabinet underneath her desk. She didn't need to open it to know it contained the wine from the little villa in Spain. The Christmas gift Harvey had gotten for her was partly responsible for everything that had happened that night and since. She'd left it at his place and completely forgotten about it until then. He'd brought it over for her. It made her smile.

She dropped her purse inside the cabinet, and before even looking at her computer or checking messages, she headed out the door again. Aware that it was still early and he might not be in yet, she took her time walking down the corridor. Deciding on what she would tell him. Funny how, with so many days to think, she hadn't considered what to say to him upon returning to the firm. All her thoughts had been dedicated to a specific situation, and everything else took a second-row seat in the back of her mind. Well, it was time to face the music.

She saw him before finally approaching his office. It was strange for Harvey to be in so early. Just then, she realized how much she was actually hoping not to find him yet. If only to allow herself an extra hour to come up with a congruent reason and explanation for her behavior and absence. His secretary was not at the outside cubicle, which was good. There was no need for anybody to overhear whatever they would end up discussing.

"Donna," he said, getting up from his sitting position behind the desk. "You're back," he stated the obvious with surprise on his face.

"I am," she said, closing the door behind her and giving him a small smile while sitting on one of the chairs across from his desk. "You're here early."

"I have an early meeting to prepare for," he said curtly, then sat back down. "Did everything go okay?" He quickly asked. "I hope whatever personal thing you had going on is now resolved." There was an edge to his tone.

Donna sensed that he was not too happy with the way she'd disappeared, and with good reason, she knew, unable to blame him for his attitude. She coughed, clearing her throat before speaking.

"Yes. It was just a thing with my parents," she said unexpectedly. She hadn't planned to lie or omit anything to him. It just came out as a response to his evident morose demeanor. "I saw the wine," she said, trying to lighten up their interaction. "Thank you for bringing it," she told him with a genuine smile.

He visibly relaxed, his shoulders falling slightly. "I would've wrapped it, but I didn't think there was a point anymore."

"No. It's fine. It's perfect like that. Wrapped or not, is the best gift I've gotten in years," she told him, and he nodded, seeming pleased with her words.

They gazed at each other silently for a few seconds, both waiting for the other to acknowledge the big elephant in the room.

"Donna—"

"Listen, Harvey—"

They spoke at the same time.

"Please, you go first," she conceded with a delicate wave of her open palm.

"Okay," he said, and she could tell that whatever he wanted to say was important. His jawline was clenched with tension, and he looked apprehensive about it. "About that night," he began, and she felt her heart sink in that instant because whatever would follow in that tone couldn't be anything good. "I think we drank too much and didn't think this through."

He became silent, waiting for her to say something or to acknowledge his words. Still, she was a little stunned that those words and that sentiment of regret were what had awaited her there. Of course, why was she even shocked? This was Harvey. The man was always running from anything real or serious with her. Why would this time have been any different? She could kick herself for letting her hopes get so high and for having spent days imagining crazed scenarios where they were together, married, with a kid, living behind a white picket fence as a happy little family.

"Right, of course. Yes," she said, keeping her composure in place. No way was she going to let him think it affected her that he wanted to return to being what they always were—nothing. Or worse, colleagues, friends, family, but never more than that.

"So, we agree, then, that it was a mistake?" He inquired.

What was he doing? Looking for her approval when he had already decided for the both of them? And no, The irony was not lost on her. She was also ready to determine something that involved them both just a short time ago.

"We shouldn't have let it get that far," he added.

"No. I mean, yes. You're completely right, and I can definitely see how it wouldn't be a good idea for us to… You know, be together. I think it's best if we just try to forget it. Remain friends," she proposed, seeing that's what he wanted to hear.

"Friends," he said in a weird tone that she couldn't figure out. "Yes."

"It's a good thing I was coming to tell you," she said, making a minuscule pause before telling him, "I'm not pregnant."

She had gotten her period the night before she was supposed to take the pregnancy test, rendering it useless amidst the circumstances. When it happened, Donna thought she should've been relieved. It exempted her from having a massive conversation and confrontation with Harvey. However, the truth was that she felt saddened and empty. Her imagination had fooled her into believing a fantasy that would never be true. Donna knew it right there and then, even if she hadn't before when she only had the realization and clarity of what she wanted and the hope of maybe someday. But now, being back and having such a conversation, reality had set in.

"What?" he asked, his eyes nearly popping out. He got up from his chair, and she could see his thoughts rising a mile a minute. "Donna…" He got around his desk and stood before her. "What are you saying?"

"You know… because…" She stared at him and gave him a look as if it were obvious. "You came inside? The last time we… you didn't pull out in time," she reminded him. It was as if he had forgotten it, or it was something he hadn't really thought about, which was weird; she could have sworn it would worry him and that he would obsess over it. Perhaps she was wrong. Maybe he was so drunk he just forgot.

"God, Donna," his voice was strained and perturbed. "You're right, yes. I forgot. How could I've been so stupid?" he asked but not directly at her, and she got the sense that he was talking about forgetting and not about letting himself go inside of her or even the original notion that pulling out was a good idea, to begin with.

But it didn't matter anymore. Things were said. Nothing had ever been so clear, and what was done was done. Their night together seemed to have only brought concerns, problems, and misunderstandings to them. Whatever felt right about it, she could and would try her best to put it out of her mind for good.

"The good thing is that there's nothing to be concerned with. I just wanted to make sure you knew that."

She got up from the chair, and they were both standing, with only a few steps to separate them.

"So, then, it's a relief," he said, and it sounded more like he was asking and not telling her. But she didn't have the will to overanalyze everything he said or how he said it. His earlier words had been crystal clear. Even a dummy would understand.

"Quite," she agreed. "Well, I'll let you get back to your prep work. I have a lot to catch up on myself," she explained, aiming to leave since everything necessary had been said.

"Before you go," he stopped her as she was about to turn. "Can we hug?" He asked, unsure. "I want everything to be okay between us."

He looked beyond mortified. His earlier words and his current demeanor were contradictory at best, leaving Donna with an uncertain feeling.

"Of course," she said and received his hug with open arms, but a bit of hesitation was still present. Being held by him would always feel nice, regardless of their romantic status or lack thereof. "Everything's okay with us. We'll just be what we've always been to each other."

She felt him nod as they continued to hug. They embraced each other in the middle of his office for a good minute. An eternity to most, but to them, not nearly enough. After pulling apart, they smiled softly and returned to their individual duties. The firm wasn't going to run itself.

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Zane Specter Litt on March 28th, 2019 at 3:46 p.m.

It had been busy at the firm. The first months of the year were always hectic, although so were the last. However, it had gotten busy with more than clients and potential clients. Individuals like Hardman were always trying to seize any opportunity and attack them. So, between their regular load of work and having to defend the firm from disgusting predators, they had a rough going that resulted in most of the upper management working closely together to put out fires wherever they appeared and to keep their work-home afloat.

Work chaos had prevented Donna and Harvey from drifting apart too much. The first month was awkward between them, but they had to push past the uncomfortable parts like they had done many years before. The firm and their friends needed them to be a cohesive team, so they pushed through, working with each other countless times and being entirely professional about it.

The most noticeable change to their relationship was the quality time they used to spend together after work; it had diminished naturally, and only when it was initiated by someone else would they stay behind to share a drink and a laugh for a while. The other changes were more subtle, like how they treated one another. The ease and friendliness of their banter, which some could have considered flirting, had diminished to the point of almost completely vanishing. It would resurface at times because they couldn't help themselves, and even when trying to be careful and maintain a certain distance, their chemistry and need to outwit each other still won out.

Given their close working proximity, Donna continued being able to tell things about Harvey's personal life, even when she didn't want to. It was something out of her control. The gift of being perspective and so attuned could sometimes be a curse more than a blessing, like when she knew he was going out with someone new or how she could point out if it was a repeat conquest. And that's how she was aware that even though he had resumed his ways, he hadn't been seeing anyone seriously, only casually.

She had some documents for him to review and sign as soon as possible. There wasn't time to wait for assistants to handle it when she could just walk into his office and have his signature on the spot. She bypassed his secretary, who tried to tell her something, but Donna just signaled and whispered that she would be quick.

He was sitting behind his desk, and she didn't give a second thought before marching right in and getting straight to the point.

"Harvey, I have the third proposal for the Merrigan account holder to review. We just need you to approve it and sign it before we send it to them." She was standing before his desk by then, handing him the papers. "It came across my desk after I contacted that…" He reached for the documents, but his eyes were elsewhere, so she trailed off, turning to see what he was looking at and noticing for the first time that someone else was in his office.

"Thanks," he said in a mousy tone once the folder was in his hands.

"Oh. My apologies, I didn't know you were busy," she said, looking at a very comfortable Holly Cromwell sitting on his couch with a drink in her hand. The woman flashed her a smile and placed the tumbler on the table in front of her.

"Hello, Donna," Holly politely greeted her.

"I didn't mean to interrupt," she said, redirecting her eyes at him. "I can come back," she added. "This can wait." She snatched the folder from Harvey's hand, turned around, and walked out.

Donna reached her office, dropped the papers on her desk, and sat on her chair. She was not a fan of the woman, and seeing her there took her by surprise. Immediately, she could tell that her visit was of a friendly nature and not business-related. Given Harvey's cagy demeanor, she could only assume that they were seeing each other, and if that wasn't the case yet, that was at least the intention. She didn't really care about it. She didn't care who Harvey went out with. However, out of all the women in New York City, why did it have to be her?

Louis trodded inside her office with a dance-like move.

"Did you see who's in Harvey's office?" He asked her with an unfriendly look on his face. "Is that job hunter, Holly Crumbs-something I don't care to know," he said disapprovingly. "I do not like that woman," he said in case it was unclear.

Donna thought he was stealing the words right out of her mouth, but she ignored what Louis knew about Holly or why he wasn't keen on her. So, she was reluctant to partake in a bashing session with him. She just didn't want to be that person who talked about another woman behind her back. Not only because she wasn't an admirer of Holly's methods but also because there was a smidgen of jealousy in her dislike. Donna was self-aware enough to admit it, at least to herself.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Louis," she faked ignorance. "I have a lot of work to do and don't have time for office gossip right now."

"But I—"

"No, Louis," she stopped him. "Not right now."

"I just wanted to—"

"Louis," she said, exasperated, getting up from her chair abruptly and dropping something. "What did I just say?"

"Fine," he said, annoyed but deciding to give up, vacating her office while mumbling unkind words under his breath.

She exhaled loudly before looking down and seeing the papers she had dropped spread out on the floor.

"Great, that's just great," she said, scrunching down carefully to pick up the mess. As she held several pages and still had a few more to go, she heard someone walking into her office and figured it was Louis again. "What did I just say—" she looked up to keep telling him off, but instead found herself at eye level with Harvey's crotch.

He was just there, right in front of her. She hadn't looked all the way up yet, but she knew him well. That was him, those were his shoes, and those were his—pants. Donna's eyes darted up, looking at him from below her lashes to find him displaying a smirk. And she instantly knew what memory was reenacting in his mind. Knowing his head went there, thanks to the weird position they found themselves in, provoked her to recall the same thing.

They moved with an excruciatingly slow tempo, building the correct tension with every touch. He would press her toward him with each measured thrust as they continued to kiss, and her hands kept him steady by holding his head at the back and caressing his soft hair. Guided by the smooth jazz song in the background, their matched rhythm gradually increased, and their current position couldn't keep up. Their mouths separated, gasping for air. Donna moved her head down, starting to lick and nibble around his neck while trying to recover her breath. Harvey's hold on her lower extremity became firmer, securing her leg on his waist while his free hand gripped underneath her other thigh, below her ass cheek. The leverage he had, by reclining against the counter, made it easier for him to lift her up the floor completely.

Her hands looped around his neck, holding onto his back and shoulders to allow for a more secure position as each new intense plunge began. She started to suck on his salty skin, making him release a throaty moan before he could take advantage of a calculated, stronger move that made her gasp and separate slightly, allowing him to make his way to her breasts, catching one of her nipples with his lips to suction arduously while keeping up with his upward thrusts.

Donna couldn't keep quiet, her mouth emitting all types of pleasure-indicative noises as she felt a tingly charged current travel through her nerve endings and pool right at her lower belly.

"Harvey," she whimpered, calling his name to get his attention, feeling the repercussions of his mouth in more than just the upper part of her body. He looked up, their gazes meeting as he continued to suck on her nipple. His eyes were glossy and darker than she had ever seen before, and she realized they probably reflected her own. "Kiss me," she demanded, and he obeyed.

After releasing her nipple with a last sultry lick, he brought his face closer, and she captured his lips in a ravenous kiss while holding onto his shoulders and pushing down against his groin. He halted his thrusts, tightly gripping her ass cheeks to create circular movements with her hips as he pressed her closer to him, causing her clit to constantly rub against his pelvis.

"Oh God," she moaned into his mouth as she felt her walls tightening around his trapped cock.

He breathed hard through their kiss and, without breaking their link, said, "come for me."

She felt all the tension that had built in her lower body, beginning to give in to a release. Her muscles contracted, tightening even more around him, making him twitch inside of her. It made her worried he wouldn't be able to resist.

Separating her mouth from his and looking straight into the deep pool of his dilated pupils as she came. "Don't you dare come," she warmed him, and he took in a sharp breath, then he mischievously smirked at her without stopping the circular movements that intensified the potency of her pleasure as she rode the last of her orgasm.

Relaxation found her body and she let her head drop to rest on the crevice of his neck while she regained her breath. He still held her in place, and she could feel his hardness inside of her. "You remember what I said about blowing you?" She asked with a seductive tone. "I meant it."

"Oh?" He lowered his eyes, seeing her peaceful yet serious face, which made him smile.

"Let me down," she instructed, and he carefully pulled out of her and lowered her legs at the same time.

As soon as she found herself on the ground, her gaze lowered to his hard-on, her right hand extending to grab it and easily stroke his silky-coated shaft as her body dropped, resting most of her weight on her knees. Donna looked up at him, staring from behind her lashes as she took out her tongue, leisurely encircling it around the tip of his cock, and repeating the action a few times before covering it with her lips and gently sucking, tasting herself on him while her hand kept on stroking.

Donna took more of his erection into her hot mouth, making him go in and out repeatedly with the assistance of her skilled fingers rubbing around him. Her action sped up, and even more of him went into her sloppy, wet opening. She made sure her rapid movements made the head land on the soft inside of her cheek. At the same time, her hand lowered to the base of the shaft to keep him steady, her fingers running out of space when her quick movements kept bringing more of him into her mouth, so she redirected her hand to the back of his body, grabbing his ass cheeks and pushing him further in while continuing to look at him through her lashes, witnessing his hypnotized trance as his eyes didn't even dare blink and miss anything. Then, she observed his hand moving before it came into contact with her hair, picking up a few outburn strands that framed her face and tangling a good portion of it around his fingers. She let go of his butt, and he pulled and pushed her head to maintain her movements. Soon, she had him going deeper, her lips almost reaching the hilt of his cock, and one of her hands repositioned to massage his balls while she took him in as far as he would go, provoking him to grunt and create throaty moans. His hard-on hit the back of her throat several times, and then she felt and heard herself nearly gagging before he pulled her hair not so gently and then completely released it.

Catching her breath, she strongly suctioned and lavishly kissed the head of his cock, taking her time with it and smiling wickedly at him before meticulously running her tongue along the veiny shaft until arriving at the base and letting her lips go lower, taking one of his balls inside her mouth to purposely suck as her hand started to stroke from the mid-shaft until the tip, her thumb applying pressure on it and feeling it pulse back. He began to grunt, and it made her suck harder, taking the other side of his sack inside her mouth, getting it wet before releasing it to keep massaging while her mouth returned to the head of his cock. She licked off a bit of precome that had accumulated at the tip, indicating that he was close. She applied pressure on it using only her tongue before welcoming him into her mouth once more, her hand raising up to round and stroke his shaft as she speedily moved her head down on him, sucking vigorously between intervals until she tasted salty hot liquid spilling from him, she swallowed some of it, but deliberately let some drop on her breast.

He took hold of his still-hard cock and began to stroke himself, dripping down on her chest. She pushed up her breast from underneath, bringing them close together and raising flat on her feet; coming to a squatting position, he placed his erection on the small crevasse beneath her boobs, slipping it through the makeshift tunnel of softness. He quickly slid up and down until she squeezed the last of his seed with her full breasts.

She discreetly shook her head and rolled her eyes at him, taking him out of his reverie and redirecting her attention to picking up the remainder of the scattered papers. She had started to get up, and he offered his hand for assistance, but she didn't take it. Donna stood by herself to square and adequately arranged the papers with help from the flat surface on her desk before sitting on her chair and placing them in front of her.

"What do you want, Harvey?" She asked. Her tone was not the friendliest.

"Don't you need me to sign some papers?"

"Yes," she said, pointing to a blue folder on the other side of her desk. "There. Help yourself," she told him about picking out a pen to sign with from the holder.

He took a pen, opened the folder, and quickly scanned the legal words before putting ink to paper and closing the folder to hand it back to her.

"Thanks," she said, receiving it and placing it on her desk without looking at it or him, focusing on the work in front of her.

He nodded and was about to leave, but before he was through the threshold, he turned and said, "Donna, about Holly." That got her attention. She looked up, and he was hesitant.

"What about her?"

"Me and her, we're just—"

She cut him off before he could get personal. "You don't owe me an explanation, Harvey," she reminded him.

"I know. But I just wanted you to know that—"

She interrupted him again. "No. Really, Harvey. I don't want to know any details. I'm happy for you if you're happy," she said with honesty, and he received it with a single nod. She was adamant about keeping their private lives private. It was better that way. It was easier. "Now," her tone was dismissive. "If that's all, I must get these papers delivered before the end of business today."

"Of course," he relented. "I'll leave you to it," he said before walking out.

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Zane Specter Litt on June 16th, 2019 at 10:35 a.m.

It'd been six months and a couple of weeks since the first night of the year broke him. And he must be broken, and not only heartbroken but really anatomically broken, because he hasn't been the same Harvey again. To clarify, metaphorically, his heart had been shattered into countless little tiny pieces, and it had taken months for him to reconcile the idea that whatever future he might have envisioned for him and Donna was over and buried for good. That led him to understand that the only way to stop feeling hurt, emptiness, and even anger, was to go back to what they had always been; colleagues, friends, and even family in their own weird way. Returning to what they once were pained him, but not as much as it did the idea of not having a present or a future where she was a part of his life. For them to recover, he had to rescue the only part of himself he recognized and felt safe with; thus, he reinstated his womanizing ways. When he went out with various women and didn't allow himself to get sentimentality involved, life was more manageable, and there was none of the complications or sadness that had plagued him. However, he was not enjoying it as he should, so he believed himself to be broken.

In the last three and a half months, he had gone out with countless women, a few models, a few bar flies from the place he frequented, opposing counsels from an old and a new case, Holly Cromwell, and even a new judge from a different jurisdiction. And yet, he was lucky if he had sex three times, with those rare occasions solely happening upon mentally forcing himself. He engaged in the required forms of flattery and gave the attention necessary to take all those women home. His winning streak was intact in that regard because they were ready to go all the way once he had them home. Only, he was the one who was not prepared and almost always ended up cowering out. His heart just wasn't in it. He didn't get any joy from the hunt and much less from the meaningless pleasure that would sometimes follow the interactions.

Harvey even began to think that it was perhaps his condo since that was where he and Donna had been together. After going out with Holly on two dates, which was more than he was accustomed to, signaling the effort he was putting in, he invited her to a weekend getaway in The Berkshires. They had arrived together and had left separately. He just couldn't bring himself to sleep with her. Every time he tried, something would catch his eye, killing his mood. It wasn't that he couldn't get to where he needed to be to perform; the problem was more about maintaining such necessary physical condition. On one occasion, they had a candlelit dinner and decided to take the dessert in the bedroom; upon its arrival, it turned out to be cheesecake decorated with strawberry coulis and whole pieces of the fruit. NO… Nothing would happen. He knew it right away. By the second day, they were already sleeping in separate rooms, and Holly didn't even want his company to return to the city, and he couldn't blame her. Following that disastrous weekend, he never heard from her again.

On the other hand, he had witnessed Donna successfully moving on from that night. Initially, he thought the situation affected her greatly, especially when she kept a distinctive distance from him. Thankfully—and he couldn't believe that he was grateful for his firm getting attacked—they had important things to worry about, which took the focus away from their personal relationship. Many of the noticeable consequences in the first few months after she had returned to work had to be dialed back when they united to keep the firm afloat and safe from the vultures. Eventually, however, she bounced back into dating life.

He couldn't say it happened too fast, and if it had, he would've found a way to be okay with it, but she took her time, at least from what he could tell. At the beginning of the year, they were up to their necks with problems. Later, when those were resolved, he noticed she started going out with Katrina and Samantha after work. It had been a casual comment from Samantha that alerted him to it, and then, by coincidence, he ran into them at a bar, passing by their table as he was leaving with someone. That had been awkward. He wished it hadn't happened. But it did. He saw her there, and she looked laid back and content, her hair freely swaying as she laughed at something funny someone had said; it was captivating, and she was the most beautiful woman in the room. Yes, as one could guess, nothing happened that night with his guest since he couldn't get Donna out of his mind. Her outings with their colleagues were good for her; she looked relaxed and happier.

Then, about two weeks ago, he started to notice something he didn't particularly like but had no right to have feelings about—not even jealousy. However, he did feel jealous, and she could sue him for it if she liked. But she wouldn't because he was not going to make a scene or let her know.

He saw one of Louis's clients in their offices a few consecutive mornings. On the second occasion, he carried two cups of to-go coffee from Donna's favorite family-owned coffee shop. He knew Thomas Kessler was not there to bring Louis Litt his morning coffee. So, it wasn't hard for him to associate his frequent visits with her. The guy was clearly interested and was putting in the time. It had evidently paid off and, of course, he had to witness it because life apparently hated him that much. A mere four nights back, on a Friday, he was leaving the office at what would be considered early for him, around 7:00 p.m. He waited for Ray to show up, and while he did, he observed Donna getting out of the building, only to be greeted with a peck on the lips by that guy. She did not even realize he was there watching the whole scene. She'd just gotten in the back of a town car and left with him, none the wiser.

The most annoying and recent thing had occurred earlier that very same morning. He was just getting out of the elevator, and a delivery guy rode up with him. As he was about to walk down the path to his side of the firm, he heard the guy ask for Donna Paulsen's office. He had a delivery for her. Only then did he pay attention to the massive arrangement of tall, red roses the guy was carrying. He sighed and did something he didn't usually do; he rolled his eyes—hard and mumbled under his breath as he hurried down the corridor to get to his office and give himself a breakfast of champions. Macallan 18 at 8:30 in the morning. Who in their right mind sent flowers at 8 in the morning on a Tuesday? This guy was thinning out his patience and probably didn't even know who he was in Donna's life.

He'd been in his office, behind his desk chair, the whole morning. However, it was time to get up. They had an all-partners meeting, and it was getting late. He wished he didn't have to go to it as his mind was elsewhere. He was happily imagining scenarios where Kessler was a lawyer, and they would go head to head in court, only for Harvey to make him regret ever being born. There was another one, but it was more gruesome and bloody; it involved a ring and a couple of boxing gloves. If he had to be honest, he was partial to the second scenario.

Harvey walked into the conference room only to find that he was, in fact, late, and it was crowded. There were no more seats available at the table. Since he was a name partner, someone was about to get up to give him their chair, but he declined it. He was the one who was late. So he would suffer the consequences; it was only fair to remain standing throughout the whole gathering. The meeting continued, and many things they always discussed were touched on. It was rather dull to him. Until Donna got up from her chair, that is. She had to show a small display that presented the latest numbers concerning the client's satisfaction and something about efficiency in the last quarter. He was not interested in the details; he was mostly only interested in the presenter.

When she was walking around to give everyone a copy of the information, somebody, who was even later than he'd been, rushed into the meeting, tripping and pushing him by accident. The moment he went forward, she happened to have crossed right in front of him, and he fell on her back. However, the space was cramped as more people were around and behind him. Fortunately, they didn't land on the floor but on a secondary table. She was bent over, and he was right behind her, pressed against her back and her buttocks. Her hands tightly gripped the table in front of her for support. It was comical to anybody who saw what happened, especially the position that it generated, but to them, it was awkward in more ways than one. She looked around to see why he wasn't getting up. In his defense, there was not enough space for him to move, and the people were more busy being amused than cooperating or assisting them. Instead of help, he got shoved even more forward when the latest junior partner got up from the floor where he'd landed. It made him involuntarily press harder into her. He swallowed hard, and she saw him do it; it made her grip the table even tighter, both looking down at her hands and seeing how her knuckles were turning white. If their minds had held back before, given the place and circumstances they were currently in, at that moment, it gave in. They looked into each other's eyes, and both knew they were remembering an identical moment in their lives.

Donna was perched against the narrower side of the kitchen counter, her elbows resting on it with Harvey in front of her, holding a damp, warm cloth that he had gotten wet on the sink.

"We're so naked," she said, smiling and carefree.

"I wish you were always this level of nude, but for my eyes only," he said, bringing the soft fabric to her chest and pressing it softly against her creamy flesh, wiping away the residue of his excitement.

"Yeah," she agreed, peeking at his soft yet impressive Specter friend. "The sentiment is mutual," she said, and he chuckled.

He kept cleaning her, making sure to remove every last drop of evidence from her chest. Then he continued down just in case. He saw the dripping down her reddened thighs and couldn't help the smirk that appeared on his face. She'd been that wet.

"Proud of your handy work?"

He huffed smugly as he scrunched down. "Very," he confirmed. "Open up," he told her, intending to clean her there as well.

She looked down at him and gave him a seductive look while putting her index finger inside her mouth, digging into the right corner of her lower lip. "You know, I can just go to the washroom and take care of that," she said.

He shook his head, suppressing a smile. "Don't mention it," he dismissed her offer. Like he was about to pass up the opportunity of touching her anywhere. "Open," he repeated, wedging his hand through the inside of her pressed thighs. She complied, parting her legs. "My mess, my duty to clean it up."

He slowly started to wipe away the transparent, dry essence that had dripped down one of her thighs, and then he took care of the other. When he made it to her pussy, the smell of sex was intoxicating, he almost stuck out his tongue to taste her, but before he could, the warm cloth made her moan when it got pressed against her outer lips, and that did it for him, he felt his erection harden, and she also took notice since her hands began pulling him to get up, so he did.

He came face to face with her, and she stepped into him, getting so close that not even air could pass through their bodies.

"Harvey," she said millimeters away from his lips, "fuck me against the counter," she whispered in a low throaty tone.

He touched the flat surface of the countertop behind her. "Here?" He asked, and she only nodded.

He swiftly flipped her over. "Hold on to it," he instructed, and she did as she was told.

As she bent over and held on, her ass sticking out to him, he posed one of his hands on her hip, and the other disappeared underneath her ass, going directly to her center, making sure she was ready. He found her wet and hot for him, so he let one of his digits sink into her softness, making her moan, then he slipped in two more, working the three of them in and out of her to make her squirm and tighten her hold on the countertop. He removed his hand just when she was starting to move against it. Making her call out his name with discontent. He laughed for himself, sure she had no idea what he was about to do.

He held her open with both hands and allowed his body to lower so his face could also intrude under her, his mouth finding her damp pussy and his lips attaching to her like she was ice cream, and it was a hot summer day. She moaned and panted his name in pleasant surprise when she felt him there. His tongue doing inexplicable things to her. He alternated between her clit and her opening, making sure to suck, lick, and kiss the swollen nub, incrementing his intensity guided by the consistency and volume of her moaning. Then, sticking in his tongue and repeatedly fucking her with it until he felt her being close and incorporated his fingers for a faster result. When she began to come, he withheld his moves, withdrawing his face from the space and relocating to his position behind her.

Amid her mild orgasm, he penetrated her sharply, using his hands to part her cheeks and create the appropriate space for him to easily slip in and out countless times. She rode out her high as he was pounding on her, and the only thing she could do was pant out his name and hold on tightly on the counter, her breathing labored and her legs weak with the extreme pleasure he kept provoking with each push into her. He slowed down his pace for a while, and her breathing evened out; feeling her relaxed around him, he gave himself permission to drop onto her back, coming close to her creamy skin and kissing the perspiration away, creating a meaningless path with his tongue, only letting her freckles orient him. He got as close to her ear as he could, kissing the skin below it until he could suck on her earlobe and sensed her breathing getting harsh once again.

"You are beautiful, you know that?" He asked in a whisper without looking for an answer. "I've dreamed of having you like this again countless times," he said. His words were a product of their connection and the moment, but that did not detract from his adoring, vulnerable tone or the truth behind it.

As he was draped on top of her back, his hips began to sway, moving slowly inside of her.

"I've never felt like this with anyone else, Donna," he confided.

She moaned as soon as she opened her mouth to talk, "neither have I," she shared as well. "You make me crazy. Literally and figuratively," she said among moans and pants while his moves began to gain strength.

"I do?" He asked, smiling against the soft flesh of her neck before depositing a lone kiss on her shoulder.

"Yes," she moaned. "You're making me crazy right now," she told him. "I need you, Harvey." And he knew exactly what she meant.

He left one last kiss on the most prominent freckle on her shoulders before lifting himself up to resume his work. He pulled out of her to plunge back in with vigor; he did it multiple times until she was screaming his name, telling him to go faster and deeper. He would thrust inside her body enthusiastically, with a brawn, mind-numbing tempo, and she tried to match his moves, holding onto that counter for deer life; her knuckles turned white as the sound of their wet bodies colliding against each other created noises that filled the whole condo since the jazz record had halted some time ago.

As their movements quickened, he sensed her body temperature spike and felt her grow narrower around his cock. She was very close to an imposing orgasm, and he found himself being near as well. A couple more deep pushes inside her tightening core, and she started to contract around him, panting uncontrollably. He was going to spill; it was inevitable. Still, there was time for him to pull out, but he didn't want to. She was so soft and warm, perfectly wrapped around him, squeezing him with her own release. What was really a consequence of their actions? He rapidly pondered. A child? A beautiful redheaded child with her beauty, his eyes, their charm, and their intelligence? The world would be so lucky to get one of those, and so would he. Making her his was most appealing, and the prospect of doing it forever was perfection. He couldn't imagine a better outcome, so he let himself go entirely without guilt or regrets.

Together, they rode the last of their climax. Their breathing returned to a normal rhythm with the passing seconds.

"Harvey," she called to get his attention. "You didn't pull out." Her tone was normal—not mad nor content, just informative.

"I didn't," he said. "I couldn't," he lied. "We can deal with it later," he reasoned.

He removed himself from her, and she turned around and hugged him immediately. He surrounded her frame and pecked the top of her messy head, then her forehead, lowering his mouth to leave butterfly-like kisses on both her eyes, her cheeks, and her nose until, lastly, he reached her mouth, their lips melting together for a short few seconds in a gentle, loving kiss.

"I'm worn out," she said. "You wore me out."

He smiled smugly. "That I did," he said before lowering to scoop her off the floor as she linked her arms around his neck. He carried her through the open room and took her to his bed, laying her down so he could get in and cuddle the night away together.

Finally, they made enough room for him to move and help her get back to her feet. Donna was a little flustered and slightly flushed, but Harvey knew only he could tell. It wasn't too evident, and nobody else knew her well enough to recognize the fading shade of red on her cheeks.

"I'm sorry for crushing you," he quickly apologized as she smoothed out the front of her dress.

She kindly smiled, disguising any awkwardness. "Don't mention it," she accepted but dismissed his apology as unnecessary, echoing his own words in that shared memory, which they both knew.

The whole thing lasted no more than 10 seconds, but to them, it felt like ages. It was both embarrassing and made a thousand times worse by their own intrusive thoughts. Samantha cleared her throat and redirected everyone to the matter at hand. At the end of the meeting, nobody remembered nor mentioned the little incident. Their worries were placed on the following quarter's numbers and billings for the remainder of the year.

.

Zane Specter Litt on October 22nd, 2019 at 7:55 p.m.

It had taken the better part of the year for their relationship to get over the upheaval that had occurred at the beginning of it. Healing the sadness, anger, and even disappointment hadn't been a walk in the park; there was a lot of compartmentalization they needed to do to reestablish some resemblance of familiarity to their dynamic. Finally, after months of uncertainty and turmoil, where their long-time bond had hung by the delicate threat of work ethics, Donna could finally say they were back to a place that felt familiar and comfortable.

Personally, she went through a grieving process. Without a linear order, she realized that she had gone through all 5 stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and, lately, acceptance. It allowed her to mourn what could've been so she could finally move on and embrace what was and would continue to be. Letting her friendship with Harvey fizzle out caused her more sorrow than losing a romantic love ever could. She craved to recover what they always had; complicity, unwavering loyalty, trust above all, and even their bickering was something she yearned for.

When she broke up with Thomas and didn't feel a shred of the despair and pain she'd felt over Harvey, she knew she had to make a better effort to repair their situation. Granted, her relationship with Thomas had been short-lived, lasting a mere few months, but there was certainty in it, and he was what many would describe as a perfect man, only he was not the right one for her. However, he had been charming, attentive, and was willing to give her a future together. Perhaps that had been their problem; she had never envisioned a family with him. That only ever happened to her with one person—Harvey. And regardless if she couldn't have it with him, she knew she couldn't settle for less. She would get that feeling of hope and excitement again with the right person; she knew she just had to be patient. Donna had to believe that there was someone other than Harvey for her out there. It just wasn't going to be Thomas or anybody else she had to instruct to take their vitamins so they could keep up with her.

Shortly after her renewed single status, she became more flexible and lowered her guard to allow him to get closer, permitting them the chance to rebuild their strained relationship. It took time to even regain a remote resemblance of what they were. She would allow him to come to her office and chit-chat about meaningless things after dark. Even offered him a drink sometimes, which he would gladly accept. Within a week, one drink turned into two, and she would sit next to him instead of remaining behind her desk. But that was her limit. She did not let it get further than that; two whiskeys were what the doctor prescribed. It's not like she would just completely forget what had happened the last time they let alcohol freely meddle in their lives.

Currently, she was confident enough in what they were to even go to him first. Walking into his office at the end of a taxing day and just plummeting onto his couch until he put a drink in her hand, they could just go on talking about nothing and everything simultaneously. It felt good to be back to being them. It felt easy. Effortlessly simple.

"Yes. A woman, and a hot one too," she said approvingly. "Alex introduced them. I think Samantha said she was his wife's cousin."

"I think it serves her well. Who knows? Maybe now she can stop being so scary," he commented, realizing something as he sipped some of the amber liquid from his tumbler. "Or can you imagine if she actually becomes more frightening? There is no telling what being with a woman will bring out in anybody," he commented on the possible outcomes of Samantha dating a woman. "Take it from this gentleman."

"You, sir, are no gentlemen," she informed him with a mouthful of giggles.

They were nearly at the end of their two-drink limit. "No? May I remind you of a certain partner meeting a few months ago? Because, as I recall, I was nothing but composed," he said, his voice suggestive.

"No," she said, cheeky and suppressing a smile. "There's no need for that. I think I might still be mortified over it. Thank God everyone put it out of their minds as soon as it happened."

"I didn't forget," he looked at her from his side of the couch with a twinkle in his eyes.

"You shouldn't," she agreed. "I'm unforgettable."

"And where do you leave me?" He asked, straightening the knot of his tie and smoothing the lapels of his suit jacket. "My performances should be in a hall of fame."

Now, what performances was he referring to? She wondered. In the courtroom, in a boxing ring, or in the bedroom? Because they were all pretty memorable.

"Who are you? What's your name again?" She pretended in jest. "Do you work here?"

They continued to enjoy their flirty banter for the next fifteen minutes until she decided to call it a night and left him to enjoy the rest of his drink.

The next morning, walking into the foyer after the elevator doors opened to let her out on her floor, she arrived a little later than her usual time. Harvey was coming down a hallway. She saw him and smiled at him to greet him before heading down the opposite way.

"Donna," he said, catching up to walk and talk with her. "Two coffees. Huh. Is one of those for me?"

"Now, what would even make you think that?"

"You like me?"

"Well, that's not relevant right now. This coffee is a tool, and you're too easy. If you were my target, I wouldn't need to sweeten you with caffeine."

"Auch," he said, faking being offended. "That hurts. I'm quite difficult, I'll have you know."

"Not for me, you're not."

He chuckled and didn't even deny it. They both knew she was right. "Seriously, who's it for?" His curiosity was piqued.

He sighed and rolled her eyes. But still, she would share. "I need to know how Samantha's date went."

"Office gossip? This early? That's not good for you," he lectured.

She knew he was just messing with her. "Shut up, Harvey."

"Tell me about it later?" He quickly asked before stopping to redirect his steps.

"You betcha," she agreed with a slight movement of her head, and both went their separate ways at the beginning of the fork that divided the corridor.

.

Zane Specter Litt on December 24th, 2019 at 7:10 p.m

The firm had been nicely decorated in preparation for Christmas since the first week of December. The welcoming lobby that began at the reception desk had a majestic and traditional tree adorned with red poinsettias, golden ornaments, and a lit crystal star topper. In addition, there were potted plants with red and white flowers on every surface around the offices. The holiday spirit was present in that regard. However, the joy had shrunk for many and even faded when a business deal hindered their ability to meet their out-of-town engagements with family and friends.

The name partners and COO had all been on alert for the past week due to a major case, involving a top client, being delayed and postponed day after day. It ruined almost all their plans revolving around Christmas time. Luckily, they had finally achieved what seemed bleak for the better part of the last two days. The deal had finally wrapped up at a shocking 5 p.m. on Christmas Eve.

To some, it was too late to resume their plans and reach their destinations. For others, the deal's closing happened just in the nick of time so they could make it home to their families. Robert and his wife had missed their flight to Seattle. It was already too late for Alex to drive down to Baltimore and join his in-laws for the evening. Samantha hadn't shared her plans, but the vicissitudes didn't seem to affect her overall. With everything that had already gone wrong, Harvey had made up his mind about taking a train up to Boston, deciding against it and opting to spend a quiet time in the city. Louis was fortunate; his commitment was simple, accompanying Sheila to her sister's house on Christmas morning. Although he was the first to leave after the deal was resolved, he looked forward to being with his pregnant fiance. Lastly, but not less important by any means, there was Donna. She had left a while after Louis, concluding that she could still make it home to Connecticut and spend Christmas Eve with her parents instead of rushing off in the early morning hours.

That left Harvey, Robert, Alex, and Samantha in the firm's conference room after everything had been signed and packed up for delivery to the federal circuit courts on the first order of business the next working day.

"So," he said to his fellow lawyers, "how about a burger to celebrate?"

"I'm sorry, Harvey. I'm going home to my wife and kids," Alex said, standing up and tucking in his chair. "It's Christmas Eve, man. It's time to be with family and the people you love." He was nearing the door before he said, "Merry Christmas, everyone!" Taking his leave.

Harvey turned to look at the older man. "Robert?"

"I can see how you would think I'd be your best choice for a burger," he mused. "But I also have to decline your offer," he said, and Harvey looked dispirited. "You heard him," Robert said, indicating with his finger the way Alex had left. "It's time to be with the people we love. I'm going home so Laura and I can FaceTime my little girl."

Robert rolled out his chair, making space to stand up. Harvey shifted his head, looking at Samantha.

"Don't even think about it," she told him before he could speak. "I, too, am gonna go to be with someone I love," she told him, emphasizing the last word purposely. "Maybe you should do the same," she suggested, getting up to meet Robert at the door.

"Merry Christmas," they said to him in unison.

"Merry Christmas," Harvey muttered.

Samantha was sneaky and far more clever than he gave her credit for. They were all correct; people should be with those they love at Christmas. He wished he could be with the one he loved most. Sadly, that sentiment was likely one-sided. Although he and Donna had been getting along splendidly for the last few months, like nothing had happened between them almost a year ago, that didn't mean there weren't any boundaries. If he went up to her and told her he loved her and wanted to spend Christmas with her, she would probably laugh at him or ask him to explain, maybe both. Perhaps he could only tell her he didn't have anywhere to go, that she should take pity on him and bring him along, but she would know it was a lie. Harvey always had his brother with his children, and now even his mother, to spend it with.

Something he skimmed over in his brain bothered him. What would Donna's reaction be to a proper declaration of love? He could envision multiple possible scenarios, but they were all in his imagination since he never told her how he loved her. He never told her! How was it even possible? Among all that they'd overcome, that felt like something he should've explained at some point, even if she didn't reciprocate his feelings. People could never have too much love.

Harvey thought she knew how much she meant to him, but did she really understand it? He never told her in so many words, assuming she just knew it. His chest started to hurt, and the air from his lungs wasn't enough anymore. He felt as if a panic attack was coming on, like when she left him that time to go work for Louis instead of him. Only he knew his current state was due to the words he never shared with her.

He stood up from the chair rapidly, went towards the narrow table against the wall, and served himself a glass of water from the pitcher on the silver platter. His breathing was harsh before he exhaled and inhaled a couple of times to calm down and drink the clear liquid without choking on it. Once he felt more relaxed, the urgency in his mind and heart didn't dissipate. Harvey knew what he wanted to do—needed to do, and he was prepared to drive to Connecticut if it meant letting her know how he felt about her. He rushed to his office, picking up his phone and the keys to the Mustang he'd gotten a few days prior at the car club.

Before getting on the road and heading out of state, Harvey decided to first stop by his condo to change out of his three-piece suit into something more relaxed and pack a small bag. Regardless of the result, in the worst-case scenario, she would pity him and allow him to stay the night, or he would find a hotel in the area and drive back in the morning. He didn't want to overthink outcomes, or he might chicken out and not do it, but she deserved to know. After years of wondering how, Donna finally had to hear it.

He found an available spot adjacent to his building and quickly took it, as it was unusual for such convenient parking to be available. He walked on the pavement, the crisp, chilly air of late December hitting him in the face while he quickly closed on the short meters to the entrance, just expecting to be greeted by the doorman. However, before he could even reach the door, he saw her light copper hair dancing around with the wind, her frame covered by a cream-colored, A line, pea coat. She was heading straight to the building while he was going unnoticed.

"Donna," he called out to her.

She turned around. The tip of her nose and her cheeks were pinkish from the cold. "Harvey," she said, surprised to see him there.

He came to a stop in front of her. "I thought you were leaving the city."

"I decided against it," she said. "Maybe tomorrow I'll join them."

He nodded and couldn't help but smile because she had gone to his place. To find him. Maybe there was hope after all. "And what are you doing here?"

"Well, I figured you would be home already, and I know you didn't have plans. Do you wanna get a burger or Thai food?" His smile grew wider. She wanted to spend the evening with him. A festive one at that, as it was considered by many like the real beginning of Christmas Day. "Unless you were going somewhere."

"No. I mean, yes. I was planning to go looking for you."

"Looking for me?" She narrowed her eyes in disbelief. "I was supposed to be arriving at my parents' by now."

"Yes. I know."

Her face became confused, and then it softened. "Well, I'm here. You've found me."

"Can we go up and talk?" He asked, pointing up to his building.

Donna looked up like she didn't know the size of the structure. Then her head hung low, and she held her breath before gazing into his eyes and giving a short nod. "Let's go." Although she intended to go in before, he understood her hesitation, remembering that she hadn't been to his condo during the whole year.

He opened the door, and they walked through it. She went in first as he stayed behind to lock it up, then he saw her standing in the middle of the open space, pensive, seemingly unable to go the rest of the way while looking outside the clear windows and focusing on something in the distance. As he approached her, Harvey put his hands on her upper arms, rubbing through the fabric. She reacted by looking at him over her shoulder and then realized he was asking for her coat. She unbuttoned it, and he slid it past her extremities until it came off, revealing her elegant burgundy office dress. He went to hang it before walking all the way in, leaving her in the same spot, in the open space behind the living room chairs.

Standing on the other side of the chairs. "Is it weird being back here?" He directly asked.

She redirected her eyes from the surroundings and looked at him. "A little," she said, giving him a soft smile. "Nice tree," she commented about a small potted pine tree in the corner.

His place wasn't festive. The only decorations were the string of lights around the small plant and the rounded wreath at the front door.

"Thank you." He understood her apprehension. "I need to tell you something, but I don't want to make you uncomfortable," he said, deciding to get to the point.

That piqued her interest. "Oh?" Her brows furrowed.

"Maybe you should sit," he offered the couch with a hand gesture.

"I prefer to stand."

He nodded. Easier way to bolt for the door, he realized. "Okay." There was no going back. He was about to risk everything. He was about to risk her so she knew exactly what he felt. "Some years ago, I said something to you and never explained it."

He couldn't read her expression at all. And that made him nervous.

"What did you say, Harvey?" She wondered in a small voice charged with emotion. It almost gave him the impression that she knew exactly what he was talking about.

"I told you I love you," his tone was serious but laced with an endearing softness.

Her eyes glistened brightly with tears; he saw them clear as day, and he itched to go and catch them before they rolled down her cheeks, but he felt rooted to his spot on the floor, terrified of scaring her or hurting her with his words.

She swallowed before speaking. "Love me how?"

He didn't make the decision but instead felt his own feet carrying him closer to her, walking around the chairs and coming to stand before her. She looked just as nervous as he felt. It seemed like she might run away at any point, and he couldn't have that, so his hands reached out to hers, taking them in his and holding her tightly to ensure she wasn't going anywhere before he could tell her how.

They gazed into each other's eyes, and he licked his lips, preparing himself for everything he would say. "I love you like I'll never be able to love anybody else. I love you so much that it scares me to tell you how much it is. My love for you is not new. It's been there since I can remember, constantly growing. It intensifies every time I sneak a peek at you when you aren't looking," she softly smiled through the tears in her eyes, making him slightly relax as he continued to talk. "When you smile and it reaches your eyes. When others get to see just how big your heart is. My love for you triples every time you give me a hard time, and don't let me get away with shit."

At that point, he felt like his words weren't enough anymore. They couldn't possibly explain all that he felt for her. A few tears were streaming down her cheeks, so he delicately raised one of his hands to wipe them away with his thumb.

"Is all of that true?" She asked with the smallest voice he'd ever heard from her. And it pained him that she would doubt his words. It hurt even more that he was the one responsible for it. He didn't tell her when she asked. He didn't tell her when he knew it. Her reaction indicated that all she ever needed was for him to say it.

"I wouldn't lie to you. Not about that."

"You've lied before," she said with certainty, and he was ashamed.

"I lied when I said being with you had been a drunken mistake," he conceded. "I lied while knowing my words could never be true, and I carry that lie around with me every day."

Her tears kept flowing down, staining her face. He wanted to take her pain away and make it stop, but the only way he knew how was with the truth.

"Why?" She asked, confused. "After everything it took to be together again, why did you have to ruin it for us?"

Her words were harsh, and he tasted bile rising up his throat. He felt sick about it and wished he could go back and undo everything he said, declare his love instead, and do things differently. Why did he have to be so scared that it almost crippled them for good when all she ever needed was to be reassured of his feelings and his intentions? If he could punch himself, he would.

Once he could get words past the impending knot. "I thought you didn't want—us. I thought you ran away because you regretted what happened, and I was scared of losing you." A whole year of pent-up emotions was evident in his voice. "So I defaulted to what I thought you wanted to hear."

She took her hands away from him, raising them up to push back the hair around her face and move around, turning away. "Oh, Harvey," she lamented. "This is so messed up."

"Don't say that," he pleaded, scared shitless that she might not want them anymore. "We still have time."

"I mean," she breathed loudly before facing him again. "I only stayed away because I thought I might be pregnant, and I wanted to be, but I was also afraid you wouldn't be okay with it."

"That's what you believed?" He asked, and she gave him a slight nod. "No, Donna, I would've been more than okay with it. I would've been thrilled to have a family with you. With the woman I love. And I still want it if you'll have me."

She wiped her own tears and looked at him sweetly. "I love you, too, you know."

"About time you said it," he complained with a smile while walking towards her to eliminate the little distance that separated them.

"I'm in love with you, Harvey." He'd gotten close enough to touch her, making his right arm go around her back and pressing her to him while she continued to profess her love. "I think a part of me has loved you from the moment we met. That's why I seem to be unable to stay away from you."

"I'd never want you to stay away from me," he said, lowering his head and capturing her lips with his own.

It was a soft but passionate embrace. She held his face between her hands, and his tongue pushed against her lips until she granted him access. They continued to kiss, becoming breathless, only parting for oxygen and to gaze lovingly into each other's eyes.

"So, it seems like this Christmas won't be half bad after all," he said, smiling down at her, pressing her to him while holding her by the waist.

"After everything, Santa has finally taken pity on us," she agreed as her hands looped around his neck. "Do you want to come to my parents' with me tomorrow?"

"Why, Donna. You already want me to meet the parents and everything?"

She playfully smacked him in the back of the head. "First of all, you've already met them. And second of all, it's been over a decade. How is that too soon? What? Do you want to wait another year or just see them again at the wedding?"

"Wedding? What wedding?" He feigned astonishment, enjoying messing with her a little too much.

"Oh. Because you think I'm just gonna let you put a kid in me, and there isn't going to be a wedding. I see how it is," she said, pretending to be disappointed.

He chuckled. "There can be a wedding. There can be a huge wedding if you want it, but please, don't tell me I have to wait until then to put a baby in you."

"No. You can whenever," she said with a sexy smile. "Let that be my Christmas present to you since I didn't actually get you anything."

"Oh! Only as long as we can give the same thing to each other because I didn't have half a mind to do any shopping."

She rolled her eyes. "Thank God, actually."

"That's not fair. You liked my wine gift from last year," he defended.

"That's so frugal of you to use last year's gift to get bonus points this Christmas, too. Very economical, very cheap," she teased him.

He was sure she was playing around since she had already purchased her own present for that year. She even sent him an email with the receipt and a picture of the nude Louboutin pumps. A gift that would serve them both very well, he was sure, and he was excited to see her wearing them.

"Maybe," he accepted. "But like we agreed, our real presents are in that bedroom," he tilted his head to point toward it.

"In the bedroom this time. Huh?" They both chuckled. "Well, in that case, What are you waiting for, Specter? I wanna unwrap my hot, naughty Christmas present," she said suggestively, caressing the back of his neck.

He smirked. "Ufff. You say the sweetest things to me," he lowered his head and kissed her again. "But Christmas is not for another few hours," he reminded her when he slowly released her lips.

"And since when do you care about the rules?"

"I don't," he assured her, their faces still very close together. "I just… Promise me something, Donna."

"Anything," she assured him, rubbing her nose with his.

"You'll be next to me when we wake up in the morning," he said, leaving all jokes aside.

"I promise," she said, staring directly into his eyes. "I'll wake up next to you every morning if you'll have me."

"God, yes!"