The Dragon's Father - (Original Isekai Hentai Story Gone Silly)

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Many, many years ago (read 'many, many' as 'two'), a dragon egg was found by a young adventurer.

Such a tale sounds like beginning of a legendary story. After all, dragons are meant to be powerful entities.

Not just in regard of myths, but the reality of the realm known as 'Mermadil'. A large continent created by a sole Creator God that vanished centuries ago, leaving behind several races trying to 'make things work'.

There was a 'pecking order' in the matter, with humans easily among the lowest ranks. I mean, Fairies were a thing.

Still, in the world of Mermadil, the finding of a Dragon Egg can mean many things: if the dragon is a mere 'drakenling', then the tale will be just a story for a full new noble line of heroes.

But when it comes down to what is known a 'Divine Dragon', the notion of which is akin to a mummer's tale to the folks of Mermadil, then destiny itself warp to those in possession of such power capable of beating all sorts of Demon Kings and Holy Lords.

...

Did I get you all gassed up with this setup? I think I did.

Now, going around this whole old-ass prose I just relied upon, let me be a bit more blunt with my situation.

Two years ago, I ended up reincarnated in a new world. Two years ago, I thought I had the average isekai thing going for myself. Two years ago, I found out that I was dealing with an Hentai Fantasy World.

My name is Max Pillen and this sounds very fucking bleak for me.

After all, it can either go very good or very bad. And I am not referring to sex.

Let me ask you this, what does 'hentai world' imply? Think of all sorts of medieval bullshit that was already morally ambiguous in our world and... well, add a layer of depravity. Another one, that is.

What you get is a whole lot of scary shit- did you know that orcs don't give a shit what kind of person they are raping? Men and women, they don't care. A hole is a hole.

Still, never got myself in a spot where that is relevant. Sorta.

Actually, I confess! It was that one day I found that egg.

I had been on the run, lots of the 'super-cool parties' trying to gaslit, girlboss, and mansplain over me for being a solo adventurer. I really didn't have a whole lot of thing going on for those people.

Even the 'soft-spoken' girls and boys around just didn't feel compelling to care for.

So, when all those groups were suddenly attacked while we were looking into some mysterious ruins several miles away from my 'hometown', I wasn't exactly sticking around when the orcs employed fucking shamans and wrecked the magicians.

Magical superiority is indeed this world version of 'aerial dominance'. One spell can burn, ice up, horny up, or even explode people inside out.

So yeah, I wasn't sticking around. I heard the battle cries, the fear cries, and the rape cries- The last batch of noises were the most distant when they reached my ears, but they were the loudest.

As a guy with a simple bronze sword, a full-on iron armor and hardly enough potions to endure a full charge from the orc goon squad, I picked the 'hasty retreat' path quite easily.

There were two options in mind: I either found a way out, or I was going to get ass-raped.

After all, the orcs were voracious bastards. Once a hole is too gaped up, they would be up and hunting down another fresh ass to wreck.

And my buns ain't having any of that!

I had been in a mad-sprint for a twenty minutes or so. I had delved deep into the ruins enough to pray and hope I was getting to some rear exit.

So close, and yet... not.

No, all I found was the fucking treasure room.

Lots of shiny things, jeweled weapons that could break with a single strike, several historical scrolls and-

"A WHOLE LOT OF NOTHING!" I snarled angrily and fearfully, turning my head over my shoulder to check if, from the shadows, the rape brigade was after my booty.

I couldn't see shit in the dark, but man I wasn't planning to stick around. Death sounded a fancy way.

But man, I don't want to die a Level 11 Generic Paladin.

Here I was, thinking that I had somehow gotten a new chance at life after getting hit by a Bugatti, and now I am getting a worse death.

Fuck that shit!

I looked around for booze. If I had to die, then I was going out after getting ass-full drunk and... I froze up as I found something that wasn't booze.

It looked like a bigger football, but thin-layered and with strange-looking gems coming out of it.

I tapped onto those, confused and also mesmerized by the sight when... it cracked. Tiny ripples spread all over the surface before the egg was mostly shattered and... a winged lizard came out.

A goofy-looking lizard at that. It had brown scales, topaz-yellow eyes and... well a derpy face.

"Awww, you goofy dragon."

...

Ah shit, I just found a dragon! What the hell, I want to keep it but... Imma gonna die soon!

As I contemplated the end of my existence and how unlucky I found such an OP creature in this circumstance, I froze up as I heard grunting.

Loud grunting.

I turned and saw a green-skinned pig-faced and hella-rapey looking orc.

"Buhiiii... Human... booty~!"

The bastard rushed towards me, and I felt a hint of dread as-

"SQUEE!"

The Dragon derped and... burned the pig with an intense fire blast.

My eyes were wide open at the sight of a pig-man burning before me and... I patted the baby dragon's head.

"Atta..." I paused, realizing that I hadn't named the murderous critter. Definitely not calling it 'Poopster' after its propensity to blaze any annoyance. I picked the name I could first think with what little I had. "Terra."

The dragon perked up at the praise and the naming. "Squee~!"

Gosh, what a lovable squeaker!

The newly-named Terra scorched the land as it destroyed the rest of the orcs. We were the only survivors of the raid, and yet we were able to get a whole lot out of that single mission.

The Adventurer Guild had a specific rate set for treasure hunting - the surviving party would get 20% of the treasures found in Gold coins while the rest was given to the Guild.

Since the ruins had been hosting a big ass amount of expensive shit and I was the sole survivor, I ended up with a massive fortune overnight.

This was sweet!

I had claimed a whole lot of cash which meant I didn't need to sleep at the cheapest room in the inn (and hear the innkeeper's wife getting railed by some thug) and I didn't need to accept the sass of the receptionist at the guild frequently (and said receptionist was giving mad head to the guild owner so... yeah, it was disgusting to see cum dripping from her slutty mouth while sassing at me).

The issue of becoming wealthy out of nowhere in such circumstance meant that the entire guild saw me as a 'bad luck amulet' or shit of the kind. It would have been rough for me to keep doing missions since all parties saw me as a terrible teammate- the bringer of death or shit of the kind.

...

So, I was really struggling to... hold a shit-eating grin when I proclaimed my intention to quit the damn guild.

The whore receptionist was indeed stunned, and so was the rest of the posse staffing the counter (who was rumored to also be the young harem of the owner, a bald old man). When I was asked, quite dumbly I will add, why I would bail on the job of risk my ass for more riches, I said my full truth.

"I don't like you, your sass, your cum-glazed lips, your attitude, your bitch-ass bullshit attitude, your dumbassery since you wasted your whole life servicing an old man's dick, and I definitely hate this place," I flatly stated to the slut receptionist. "But I hate you particularly because you definitely come from a good family, and they would be devastated by the kind of shit you are into right now. Same for the other hoes behind the counter making some slaves out of the young adventurers thinking they have a chance- kids, these bitches suck old man's lollipops. And with that, I say goodbye, you whores!"

So, I may have snapped a bit since it was infuriating how much dumbassery was at play with some of those stupid questions.

I definitely made the guild take a week-long break. The remaining staff was definitely depressed as more than half the group bailed to go back to their hometowns. I heard that the owner was interrogated, sent to jail and that an old granny took over but... well, the damage was done.

And I didn't give a fucking shit.

I had the cash, I had the land which I bought with some of that cash, I had books on magics and on how to make golems so I could get a self-sufficient farm going on and... I had a dragon. I had Terra.

Terra was, at first, a bit of a pet. But that changed when it started to speak, grew up very fast and then took off from its home a year ago.

After that, I only saw it visit from time to time and-

"Father, I am back!"

I rolled my eyes as the loud bellowing had me leave the safety of my little villa where golems tended to all major tasks, and get to the main courtyard where Terra had landed.

Gone was the goofy-looking little spitfire, now replaced by a monstrous and towering Divine Dragon- no, the Divine Dragon as common sense, logic and basic training allowed Terra to overcome all threats this world had to offer to him.

"Terra, you goof. I told you to write me before you visit!" I loudly replied, causing the drake to tense up and look away. "And don't give me the 'my claws are too big'. I taught you the spells to overcome this issue and write a letter with magic."

...

"I forgot."

"Of course you did, my child. Now, how about you get a quick bath in the nearby lake so we can get dinner ready."

He perked up at my words, clearly knowing what was up for dinner. "Pizza, I assume!"

"Obviously. Now go and don't let me catch you being a stinky child of mine!"

With a powerful flap of wings, the dragon took off to the lake, a single familiar and yet gutturally louder noise coming to my ears as I rolled my eyes.

"Squeeeee!"

Some shit never changes, but I guess that's fine.

After all, it is such a lovely and simple life.

AN

Not for long, Max. Not for long...