Year Six

"Dad, you're supposed to be watching me."

James' mouth turned down to a pout when all Sterling did in response was snore. Huffing, James leaned forward and slammed his palms into Sterling's side, pushing him to and fro.

"Dad!"

Sterling's snores continued.

Brooke wasn't going to like this. She always wanted to know what James got up to whenever she left the house for whatever it was she did. She never gave him a straight answer when he asked where she was going. And if he asked if he could go with her she'd always laugh and tell him to mind his own business.

Sterling was supposed to watch him. But Sterling tended to do more sleeping than watching. And James got bored sitting in bed next to him. It was too quiet. And nothing happened. And Sterling kept pushing him in his sleep. He almost fell off the bed once. Brooke wouldn't like that either.

"DAD!"

Sterling jerked awake at that, limbs flailing, snores turning into an odd snorting sound that made James laugh. He couldn't help it, his father looked so funny as he woke up, as if he were trying to swim through thick water and lift his head.

"Geeze, you got some pipes on you don't cha?" Sterling grumbled, scrubbing at an eye with the heel of his palm.

"Yep!" James said proudly. He'd been taking singing lessons for over a year now. He'd always been told his voice was good. And now his dad finally noticed!

"Well, why don't you use 'em to bother the neighbors or something, buddy? I'm trying to sleep. I got in late last night."

James frowned. "Mom said you had to watch me." He was there when she told Sterling last night. They were sitting at the dinner table eating tofu stroganoff, or the little bits James couldn't hide in his napkin, when she told him. He said "okay" like he usually did from behind the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated.

Sterling groaned. "And I bet she's gone already."

"She left an hour ago."

"Figures she didn't bother to remind me." Sterling let out a long yawn and peered at James through blinking, bleary eyes. "I guess you want me to do something with you?"

James shrugged. They didn't have to go outside or anything. This was the most amount of time he'd gotten with his dad lately. When Sterling wasn't sleeping he wasn't at the house. And the rare times he came back, he'd end up leaving again in the middle of the night because he and Brooke got into a fight about something. He'd always smell funny too, kind of like that stuff Brooke used to change out her nail polish but sweeter and worse at the same time. She always yelled about him abandoning them whenever he left, which didn't make sense to James because his dad was always back in the morning. He always checked first thing after he woke up.

"Why don't you watch a movie?"

"I watched them all."

He had, too. Brooke put movies on all the time for him whenever she was on the phone, which was a lot lately. He had them all memorized, especially Oliver and Company. He really liked that one. He always joked he was Oliver and his dad was Dodger because he was just that cool.

Grumbling, Sterling got out of bed and stumbled for the closet. James sat back against the pillows, watching him. They puffed up around him, smelling floral and fruity. He made a mental note to fluff up the pillows again. Brooke hated when they were pushed out of place.

"Want to see something cool?" Sterling waved a black VHS tape in his hand, his stubble coated mouth cocked in a half grin. James nodded, sitting up straight. If his dad said it was something cool then it had to be really cool. "You're gonna enjoy this, buddy. This can be you once your voice gets better."

He shoved the tape into the VCR and the screen bent and flickered, shifted over to snow, and then displayed a stage. A few men were scattered around it and someone yelled into the microphone about...Philadelphia? Pittsburgh? Wiscosin? The feedback was too squealy and the noise on the tape was blown out but the audience was into it as the band on the screen started playing an high energy song.

People jumped, screamed, bounced, threw up rock hands and some girls lifted their shirts. James made a face turning to Sterling who chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck while jabbing at the fast forward button.

"Woops, forgot about that part."

The people and scenes danced and wiggled in a frenzied blur of color.

"Why're they doing that, Dad?"

"Oh, um, it's just them...showing their appreciation for the band." Sterling chuckled throughout his explanation, a gleam appearing in his eye.

James stared. "I don't get it."

"Well, buddy, let's just say music is magic."

"Magic?"

"Yeah. When you know how to wield that sort of power, you can do whatever you want. You can get whatever you want. People'll be eating out the palm of your hand. They'll do everything to keep yuo happy. It's a rush! You feel like a superhero!"

James' eyes widened. "Really?"

"Totally. Having everyone's attention? Commanding a room? Being the center of their world for the length of a song? Nothing beats that feeling. Nothing."

By the time Sterling finished waxing poetic, James' fingers squeezed his arm so hard they were nearly embedded in his skin. Saliva collected in his mouth and he managed to swallow before it dribbled over his chin. Was this it? The key to getting his mom's attention? She was already happy whenever he won a small beauty pageant or a two-line part in a play. But this was bigger. This was an entire song. With so many lines! She'd have to spend more time with him then. Right?

"Can we watch more movies?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper, as if speaking at normal tones would shatter his fragile reality.

"Sure, buddy. But we can't tell your mom." Sterling brought a finger to his lips and winked. "It'll be our little secret."