If he could give Bella the world, he could give her this one thing. What Edward didn't realize was it would require him to join Bella and Jacob on a night out to a fraternity party.
While the pair broke off to get drinks, Edward was idle in the corner watching the partygoers, trying his best to disguise himself as human; he's been out of practice lately.
If someone tried to talk to him, he would grimace, showing his teeth and feeling his eyes turn to dark hollow specks of nothingness, and then they usually left him alone. Unless they thought it was a cool party trick.
His cup as a prop in hand, he watches Bella saunter out of the colored fluorescent lighting. He smiles at her beauty, the way her body sways a little drunkenly, as if she might lose balance and instinctively reach out to Edward to catch her.
As usual, Jacob's chest is out, the word SLUT written in marker over his lower torso. Whoever's idea it was—Edward does not want to know. He stares out of inexplicable horror until he realizes he's staring at Jacob's shirtless body, and quickly snaps his eyes to Bella, who's giggling with a red cup in hand.
She tucks her body neatly next to Edward's, her warmth soothing to his nerves. She reaches up to his ear to whisper, "Are you okay here? We can leave if you're uncomfortable."
He smiles and puts a hand on the small of her back to assuage any fears she might have of him being out of place—because of course he is, but he's not going to ruin her night, and he has enough respect to not ruin Jacob's, either.
Jacob comes up behind him and slaps a hand to Edward's back. He looks much lighter, buoyant, bouncing on the soles of his feet as his mouth stays in a perpetual smile.
Whew! Party Jacob is coming alive! This is—what? My fourth one? I could go all night!
"Man, I am wired!" Jacob exclaims, tipping the last half of his beer into his empty mouth. He wildly shakes his head triumphantly when he finishes the last drop. "I could do a full blown wolf howl right now.
Stone-cold and rigid, Edward shifts uncomfortably in place. Jacob's hand feels oddly warm. "Please don't."
Jacob's face droops and Edward realizes he's frowning. "Oh c'mon, Cullen. You aren't having fun here?"
Bella perks up. "Emmett would totally love it here."
Jacob raises an eyebrow. "The big dude? Five bucks I could out-keg him.
"You're underestimating him, Jake. He's huge! He's, like, two of you," Bella says, attempting to gesture with her hands the size of Emmett's body.
Jacob snickers. "I'm a wolf, Bells. I could kick his ass!"
Edward takes a deep, steadying breath. "Edward and fraternity parties don't jive. They aren't even ambivalent to each other, not even worth any friendliness. I've been offered a concoction of a drink that looks like sewer water, and the only excitement I felt was when I was deciding if emptying out the drink on his face would be satisfying enough."
Bella and Jacob go silent—and that's rare, Edward realizes in the moment. He's officially stunned two of the most chattiest people—imagine if Alice was here!—into being quiet. Maybe he should monologue more often.
"Did you just refer to yourself in the third person?" Jacob says, side-eyeing Edward.
"Did you? I mean, did you throw your drink at his face?"
"No, I got too scared."
"Ha!" Jacob cackles. I should have thought of this plan much earlier, damn. "Edward Cullen, scared?"
Edward's voice raises dangerously high without any real venom behind it. "I am out of my element here!" he exclaims, exasperated. He should feel human embarrassment and pity for himself, but really he just feels like a wet cat forced to be around other creatures under the confines of necessary socialization. He regrets not bringing a book and sneaking off to read it in the bathroom. Knowing himself, though, he'd drop Bella's abused and tattered copy of Wuthering Heights into the toilet, and then he'd have to run for his life. Curse you, Emily Brontë.
"May I remind you two that I was forcibly dragged here?"
"Oh, please!" Bella whines sarcastically. "You act like you're agoraphobic. And—and! You made me dance once, so consider this payback."
"That was ages ago! I was trying to fulfill a human experience for you that you weren't so eager to do yourself," he says, grumbling.
Jacob nearly rips the rim of his beer out of his mouth in protest. "Why do we think we dragged you out of your dungeon? The only people you've talked to since you've moved in are me and Bella."
Edward wags his finger out in the air, as if to steady the baseless accusations being thrown his way. "That's not true. I talk to the street cat on the way to class."
Bella bursts into bubbly laughter, the alcohol in her cup spilling over. "Who's not even human!"
"The cat doesn't gawk at me like I'm a vampire," he hisses under his breath.
Jacob acts out a dagger being plunged into his heart, his face full of mock agony. "We would never gawk at you."
Bella nods vehemently. "We don't bite."
Edward considers his prospects: his eternal love and his tolerable acquaintance. That will have to do.
"Consider me accepted, then," he says, feeling weirdly sincere considering he's probably standing in a stain of some bodily fluid. "As long as Jacob doesn't start hissing like a cat."
Bella and Jacob whisper conspiratorially to themselves, before Bella whisper-shouts, "No listening! And no mind reading!"
"Fine," Edward concedes, crossing his arms against his chest. In his head, Jacob is singing Christmas music to block out Edward.
A few seconds later, they break apart from each other and take serious stances—as serious as they can be while drunk—their hands folded in prayer, before taking a slight bow.
Edward's brows furrow, utterly confused. "Are you initiating me into a cult?"
"It's more of an invitation," Bella says. "No brainwashing involved."
"I accept." Edward, indulging their antics, reaches over to shake Bella and Jacob's hands respectively.
A lightbulb flickers in Jacob's mind. "But no promises on the hissing."