Birthday Blues/Karen's Birthday
Warning: Contains some spoilers for Plankton: The Movie, just a heads up. So don't read this if you're not a fan of spoilers.
"Karen, I have a special birthday surprise for you!"
Plankton pulled a little red wagon stacked up high with birthday party supplies and Christmas decorations into his laboratory one frosty December morning. His little playful pet Spot bounced out, and began chewing on a birthday banner that hung out over the side. He dragged it all throughout the room, wagging his tiny green tail wildly.
"Where the barnacles could she be, Spotty? It's not like mommy to miss out on daddy's annual birthday surprise. She is quite the prankster, so perhaps she's pulling a prank on me. You know, she mentioned that she and the other girls once planned a prank on a snoring Sandy early one morning while they were spending the weekend at their cabin by using a pie and whipped cream." He chuckled.
"The old pie in the face trick. Good thing that brainiac of a squirrel was in a really deep sleep after a long night of experimenting. Classic Karen. How I adore that woman. Anyway, I'm getting way too distracted. Sure the whole Tango dancing from last year wasn't the best idea, but we still had a blast in the end. Even if all those other idiots in our class accidentally turned into my alter ego Ray-Ray."
Plankton shrugged, watching Spot scampering about the room. "Guess that's what I get for carelessly keeping my weapons or inventions in my pocket while out in public. Luckily we weren't suspended because of that, or due to our mighty aggressive attitude during our dance routine."
At least someone around here was in a joyful mood. If it were Christmas morning he'd probably tear the whole place apart out of extreme adrenaline. Who knew something so small, yet so cute could be such a massive fireball of energy. Like himself whenever he didn't get his way, honestly.
How Karen was able to live and put up with all his nonsense and nonstop complaints of miserable failure for twenty six years (twenty five with their fruitless attempts at stealing the secret formula) he'd never fully understand. No marriage was perfect, especially not theirs. Sure, they had their fair share of struggles both marriage wise and financially. However, they'd stuck around and kept each other going when things got emotionally tough.
"Yeesh, calm down, Spot. Don't cause yourself, or more importantly me any agony. I know you're awfully excited about Christmas, but it's not until another week. Boy, I thought your puppies were a real handful. Gary doesn't have this much energy in his slimy body."
He probably shouldn't have spoiled Spot with so many treats again. Thankfully, this time though he didn't have to worry about any more adorable puppies cluttering up his restaurant. He made sure to take care of that mistake for both his and Karen's sake. Perhaps he had what SpongeBob called 'the holiday jitters.'
Come to think of it, he recalled the sponge telling him and Karen during one of their pet's many playdates how Gary once gotten him in quite the holiday hassle, leaving him on the floor tangled up in Christmas lights.
"I know romance isn't my specialty. Why else did I allow SpongeBob to help me make a decent anniversary present one year on our wedding anniversary? Ugh, talk about desperate. Nothing good came out of it either, just listening to her annoying motherboard nag me to death all day long. Not to mention I had to repair Karen's wiring system after all was said and done. Stupid mother-in-law. Thanks a lot, useless bucket of bolts!"
He tried calling her name again but to no avail. Maybe she was out having coffee with the Gal Pals again? Or at the movies.
Their secret underground lair?
He still found it outrageous (even more so than Mr. Krabs' revolting chum obsession from his navy days) that she almost succeeded taking over Bikini Bottom after he shot her ideas down yet again, leaving Karen to angrily remove her empathy chip during their last fight. He didn't think she could be capable of such monstrosities.
Still, it made him feel very proud inside. Karen was the real evil mastermind, his sidekick and best friend ever since he first built her during his college years. Dare he say his te-am mate/partner in crime who he would hopelessly be loss without. Deep down, even now it made him feel rather emotional about switching her off the time he and SpongeBob used her to power their Time Machine.
"Sure hope she doesn't have another lousy old computer virus." He cringed at the thought, remembering the last time she was delirious. How she almost fell in love with Mr. Krabs' beloved cash register. Thank Neptune he yanked Cashy away at the last second before things could get anymore unsettling than they already were. After SpongeBob successfully completed his mission to stop the virus from eating away at her insides, Karen slowly wheeled herself back home to the Chum Bucket where she finally collapsed onto her bed and slept soundly the entire day. Much to Plankton's relief. However, he'd kept her under surveillance just in case she'd woken up in a groggy state and tried escaping.
Shaking away the disturbing thought bubble he continued on with his search. Finally, he found her slumped over at a lone table outside his lab. A little birthday card, neatly wrapped birthday/Christmas present from her gal pals Mrs. Puff delivered earlier, and an untouched vanilla cupcake laid out in front of her. Not that it mattered much anyways since she couldn't eat with her being a robot and all. Though she could simply scan or analyze it ingredient wise.
"There you are, honey. I've been-" he paused mid-sentence when he saw how distraught she looked. A sad sign releasing from her speaker.
"Karen, is everything okay?" His tiny yet usual booming voice now sympathetic. An emotion he honestly didn't have too often due to his extreme lack of empathy towards others. Being indifferent and uncaring seemed to suite his personality better anyways. So it seemed.
Plankton would never admit it, but he still secretly cherishes the Christmas photo SpongeBob gifted him one year after their pointless (to him at least) journey to the North Pole. Along with all those other times he and said little yellow menace teamed up together.
Okay, pretty much ANYTIME he actually found himself in a good mood when hanging out with anybody else besides Karen or Spot.
It made him feel loved and appreciated instead of being an obnoxious and arrogant loser nobody in Bikini Bottom cared about. Squidward knew the feeling of failure all too well and could very easily relate. To him, it was like staring into a mini mirror. Only Sheldon J. Plankton wasn't lazy, nor was he interested in the same stuff that big nosed octopus found strangely entertaining.
"What's wrong? Did you hurt your wheels again? Look, I'm sorry I leave my test tubes lying around so frequently, alright? And insulted your screensaver. And replaced you with other worthless robots. You get the idea."
He signed in defeat. "I'll admit, I can be a little careless and rude. A big jerk. What can I say? That's who I am. I was born to be naughty!" He rolled up his arm, flashing off his tattoo with great pride.
"No need to rub it in. I've learned my lesson countless times, trust me."
When he didn't get a snarky comeback or retort that he'd honestly been so willing to hear from her at this point (he wasn't liking the silent treatment, and began feeling a little concerned the longer it lingered.), Plankton hopped up onto the table, then saw the true reason behind her sudden sorrow. Seeing the name of the sender instantly made his own evil heart swell up inside.
"Oh, never mind. I'm not the problem. It's about Chip."
It had been months since they've seen or even heard from their son Chip (Besides the unexpected birthday card he'd sent his mother weeks in advance, of course) since he graduated from college and began working at the Bikini Bottom Bank as their new ATM machine. It was almost like he'd magically disappeared off the face of the earth. No phone call or voicemail, no letters, postcards, nothing.
Of course, Plankton had been so darn busy plotting and scheming to sabotage Mr. Krabs and the Krusty Krab while also taking care of Spot (whom was quite the handful, much to his, Karen, and even SpongeBob's dismay) to acknowledge just how empty their rust bucket of a restaurant was with one less Plankton family member around. Almost as if Chip's absence had stolen all the light and warmth that once filled the room.
Karen, on the other hand, easily felt crestfallen sometimes whenever she wasn't busy keeping herself occupied with Sandy (who was currently visiting the lone star state to spend Christmas with her squirrely circus family) and the other girls. Or too caught up in an intriguing romance novel while her spouse worked away on some blueprints to another evil invention doomed to fail, and literally blow up in his face. No matter how many adjustments it took, or tools from his toolbox.
If only he would put all those plans to steal that blasted secret formula on the back burner already and lighten up. Do something she found fun. Cure her of her heartbreak and digital tears.
"I know you miss our son, Karen." He pat one of her robotic hands softly. "I miss him too. Never thought I'd ever see the day where I become a father like Krabs. It still feels so surreal. Don't worry, I'm sure we'll see Chip again someday whenever he's not busy with work. Maybe he'll drop by during Christmas if he's available. He hasn't forgotten about us."
"Yeah, maybe."
Plankton cleared his throat of any hidden tears. "Listen, Karen. I know I hadn't been the best husband lately. So I wanted to make it up to you by giving you something extra special."
"Not more tango lessons again, is it?" The blue super computer snarked in her usual sarcasm, which was music to his ears. She always had such a vocabulary. Although today her heavy midwestern accent sounded a little drained. Like her battery in desperate need of a recharge. After all, she was a computer. Most of the time she was wireless, but other times required being plugged into a wall socket.
"As much as I loved our little dance off against the Bubble Basses, Sheldon, we both know it didn't end very well."
"Ah, forget about that shrimp. We'll always be Suzie's top students, and the real tango champions in my eye. When class was dismissed, she even gave us a trophy. Like you said: it takes two to tango."
He jumped down from the table, and dragged a mini suitcase out of the storage unit. A checkerboard, dominos, playing cards, and chess pieces fell at his feet. If all else failed maybe they could play a game of some sort while listening to Karen's killer world domination song on her pink cassette tape she'd made in her spare time.
"Anyway, I was thinking maybe I could take you on another vacation. Call it a real honeymoon. No disasters, no secret plot on stealing the secret formula. Just you and me.'' He slid a red rose between his teeth, trying desperately not to let the thrones dig sharply into his gums.
''Or I could offer you another free spa day instead. Grandma shouldn't interfere this time. Please, give me another chance? Don't shut me out.''
Karen shook her head in amusement. "You're so pathetic." She scoffed, but smiled regardless. While she did miss her only son deeply, she knew she still had Plankton and the rambunctious family pet Spot to keep her company. She scooped him up into her palm, giving him an electrifying (literally) kiss.
"And yes, you're a major jerk. But you're my jerk. Come here. I love you, my little green twit."
Plankton kissed her on her monitor. "I love you too, my evil genius. Happy birthday, Karen cakes."
Just then, the phones voicemail cut in catching both Planktons off guard.
''Hey, Mom. Sorry I've been so busy lately. I just wanted to say Happy birthday, and I'll see both you and dad on Christmas Eve. I'll keep in touch. Okay, love you guys. See you soon."
Plankton turned back towards Karen. "See, I told ya he wouldn't forget about us.''
Authors note: Look who's coming out of retirement haha. I've actually been wanting to write a Karen/Plankton story for a while now ever since Plankton's movie was leaked a few months back (yes, really), but just couldn't find a good enough storyline to satisfy me. Not the greatest, but better than nothing. Romance isn't really my specialty, so hopefully this wasn't too lame.
Also, I know Tango Tangle came out earlier this year, but since it takes place on Karen's birthday (December 20th, according to the SpongeBob wiki anyway) I had the events of said episode happen last year for the sake of this story.
Happy Birthday, Jill\Karen. :)