I woke to the bright morning sunlight shining into my room. My eyes blinked lazily open, surprised by the brightness. Even in the summertime the cloudy drizzle usually persisted but it seemed like today would be a reprieve. My room was already stuffy with the sun heating it, my blanket kicked off at some point and pooled onto the floor. I rolled onto my back, pushing my hair off from my sticky forehead before glancing around my room. Edward sat in the rocking chair, his clothes changed from last night and gave me a soft smile.
"Come here" I mumbled, still trying to rid the sleep from me. In a second he was beside me, his body hovering near mine.
"Good Morning beautiful." He spoke softly, pressing his lips to my cheek. I sighed at his cool skin, and turned into him, burying my face into his neck.
"Morning." He gently wrapped his arms around me, pulling me closer.
"What time is it?"
"Almost eleven. I kept you up too late last night." He sounded apologetic this time, and I felt the small smile on my lips.
"I didn't mind." I said, remembering the feel of his hands on me, stroking my breasts and bare thighs. It was enough to stir some of that desire in me again. His mouth dropped to my neck, leaving soft kisses.
"I would say that is an understatement." I grinned and pulled back, watching his own face break into a heartbreaking smile. One of his hands slid down my back, brushing past my butt and caressing my outer thigh.
"Alice stopped by a while ago, wanted me to know it's going to be unusually sunny and hot for a couple of days." That explained the stuffy heat in my room this morning, thought he was doing wonderful at cooling me off. His hand raised to my face, brushing the hair back and tucking it behind my ear.
"She also mentioned giving you a day off from wedding preparations and I thought with the nice weather we could spend the day outside, in our meadow." He saw the elation light up my face and grinned back.
"She brought you some weather appropriate clothing, I left it on your dresser." His hands drifted down my body again, as if getting one more feel of the silky pajamas before pulling them away. I sighed a little but pushed up from my bed and stood.
I took the pile of clothes before going into the bathroom, taking care of business and brushing my teeth and hair. I unwrapped the stack of clothes, not surprised to find a complete outfit. Resigned to the way Alice always dressed me I just pulled them on. The bra and matching underwear set was far more delicate and pretty then I typically wore, a light blue, the top unpadded with a lace edge. The bottoms were the same, except cut higher on my hips then I was used to. They were both form fitting, the bra fitting the shape of my breasts rather than forming them the way my stiffer bras did. Next was a pair of light jean shorts, the edge of them rolled and stitched that way. They weren't too short, sitting about two inches under my butt cheek and resting on my hips in a way that accentuated them. The top was a little out of my comfort zone, it was white, with thin spaghetti straps. I pulled it on, noticing it was actually cute. It was a sort of embroidered fabric, the top half lined but the bottom half unlined, starting just under my bust it was almost see through. I decided to trust Alice, she'd gotten me this far. I pulled my hair back into a high ponytail and braved walking out into my bedroom. Edward still sat on the edge of my bed, his eyes immediately fixed to mine with a predators attention. His eyes roamed me, from head to toe, in a very obvious, flattering way. I felt my cheeks burn, still not used to his easy show of appreciation.
"You look.." His words trailed off, and his eyes found mine again.
"To much? I can change. The top is a little-" I cut off as he was suddenly in front of me, his hands coming to rest on my hips. His once forbidden but now casual touch had my heart racing in my chest.
"No. You are exquisite. Please do not change." He said softly, one hand coming up to the thin strap of my top. He gently pushed it out of the way, exposing the light blue thin lace strap of the bra.
"My sister is trying to kill me." He said, almost sounding like he was in pain. He replaced the fabric, then smoothed his hand down my shoulder.
"Come on, let's get you some food." He said, taking my hand and leading me out of my bedroom.
We made it to the kitchen, and I pulled out everything I would need for cereal. Even though it wasn't really breakfast anymore I wanted to make something quick so we could leave. I ate as fast as I could without accidentally choking, then stood up but caught my foot on the table leg. I tripped, the bowl coming out of my hands. Edward was there in a heartbeat, catching the bowl with one hand and steadying me with a hand to my elbow.
"Slow down Bella, I would really rather you not in a cast for our wedding." He said gently, making sure I was steady on my feet before releasing me. He took my bowl to the sink himself, washing it and the spoon before leaving it to dry on the dish cloth.
"Are you ready?" He asked, stepping over to me.
"I forgot my keys." I turned to head up the stairs, but he pulled my keys out of his jeans pocket and held them up.
"Already got them." He took my hand, leading me outside and then locking up Charlie's house behind me. There were a couple clouds in the sky, the sun hidden behind one. I had my back to him so he couldn't see me scowl at the ridiculous car that sat behind my old truck. I no longer fought with him to drive, he could drive that thing, I didn't want to. He probably realized that since he didn't bother to ask, just led me to the passenger side seat and opened my door for me. I slide in, lifting up a small leather bag in the process. I picked up the sticky note that was stuck on the bag.
Provisions – A
I shook my head as Edward was sliding in behind the wheel. I opened the bag, noting its contents. It held a prepackaged sandwich, like one you could buy at the grocery store, a water bottle, sunblock, a picnic blanket and a towel. The towel was the only thing I questioned.
"Is there water near the meadow?" I asked, zipping up the bag again.
"There is a small stream that runs beside it, but if you follow it upstream there is a pond. It's surprisingly clean for a natural source. Why?" He asked, maneuvering the fancy car onto the road.
"Alice packed me a towel and I was wondering why." I said, shrugging a little.
"Maybe it's going to be hotter up in the field." He suggested.
"Yeah, but she didn't pack anything to swim in, so I don't know." Suddenly I had a thought, the sexier than usual underwear. It didn't have pads, so it wouldn't hold as much water. The little devil planned this well, and I felt my face flame. I prayed he wasn't paying attention to me, but I knew that I wasn't that lucky.
"Ah, yes. Well, I think my sister has plans of her own." He said cryptically. I looked at him confused and he returned my expression.
"What's that mean?"
"Why don't you tell me?" He asked in amusement.
"No idea." I said, shrugging.
"Hmm, that is strange. You were talking in your sleep last night." He said. I really didn't know where he was going with this. That was normal, I talked in my sleep every night. When I didn't respond he continued.
"Mentioned something about Alice having a good idea and thanking her." He raised one perfect brow at me, his eyes darting to my face. I immediately knew what I had been talking about, thought Im not sure why my big mouth said it out loud. I contemplate lying but I was terrible at it, and he would only get it out of me in the end. I slumped in my seat and looked out the window, avoiding his eyes.
"Okay so…maybe the whole practice thing wasn't fully my idea…" I confessed. "Alice ambushed me when I was stuck in her makeup chair and gave me the idea. She was concerned with something she was seeing and wanted to help me." He was quite for a long moment, and I peaked at him to make sure he wasn't to mad. He didn't look it, but his face was pursed in a way that told me he had questions.
"What did she see?" He inquired.
"Nothing very bad, she told me she had already told you anything important. She said she saw you getting…overwhelmed and backing out. She was trying not to focus on…uh…details but thought I should bring up the idea with you to help us through it." He nodded vaguely.
"Yes she had told me some of that. I know she does not want to see us that way, but the truth is I asked her to look. I needed to know that I would bring you home in one piece." I was a little stunned at his admission, then I realized of course he would speak to Alice about this. I should have known.
"She didn't mention the idea to me, but maybe she knew I would not consider it."
"But you did." I said, a little confused. He hadn't argued with me about the idea at all.
"Yes I did, cause it was and still is a good idea. But I would have found it difficult to broach the subject with you, rather than you with me."
"I don't understand." I said honestly. What was the difference?
"It would not have seemed…fair, to me. Iv rebuffed every advance you have made, not because I wanted to but because I felt I had to. It would have felt unfair for me to come to you and ask for more just to work on my own self control. It would have been very ungentlemanly like." I shook my head at the absurdity of his words.
"You didn't rebuff everything, I said no in the clearing that day. Also, that's absurd. How is wanting a greater intimacy between you and your fiancé ungentlemanly like?" He gave me a strange, searching glance.
"I suppose when you put it that way, it's not." He agreed.
"I mean I won't say that I expected anything besides the obvious when I brought it up to you, but I think it's been great for us. Getting to connect with you in a more physical way is exactly what we needed. There's going to be enough awkwardness around our first time as is, this has just lessened some of that."
"Why does there have to be?" He asked, sounding genuinely concerned. I shrugged but didn't hide away the way I once would have at this topic.
"It's part of life I think. Your first time has to be awkward, it's like cosmic law or something." He gave me a crooked smile and took one of my hands, resting our joined hands in my lap. His cold hand touched the bare skin of my thigh.
"I don't want it to be uncomfortable for you."
"It won't be uncomfortable, just a little awkward and im sure well get passed it. Don't worry so much." I knew that was impossible for him, but I still said it none the less.
"Well I think you are right. The greater intimacy we have created has been amazing. Thank you for having the courage to bring it up." He pulled my hand to his mouth, leaving a gentle kiss to my knuckles then released me, moving his palm to rest on my bare thigh. His touch was welcome in the stuffy heat of the car. The clouds have fully dispersed, leaving the sun to beat down on the interior. They windows stayed up to protect Edward against the sun's rays, with the dark tint not a hint of sun made it into the car. I gave him a smile, letting my hand rest on his forearm, my fingers stroking his smooth skin.
"And I supposed Alice is always right. Maybe we should go for a swim." He suggested. I glanced at his clothes, he was fully covered, wearing dark jeans and a black hoodie, the sleeves pushed up. He dressed more casual than usual, but it did a good job of covering his skin from the sun.
"You don't have anything to wear." He gave me an uncharacteristic flirty smile.
"I wear underwear Bella." That had my mind taking off in all kinds of directions. Mostly, I wanted to know what kind. That seemed important. I had a quick flash of him in tighty whities and tried to suppress my giggles. I failed miserably and he looked at me disgruntled as I burst into laughter.
"Im sorry." I gasped in air, holding my side where a stich had started and tried to stop laughing.
"Ouch." I groaned and laughed simultaneously while I tried to stretch my side out, messaging the muscle. I barely noticed the car come to a stop as I managed to rein in my giggles.
"That's karma for laughing at whatever you were laughing at me for." He said grumpily, but gently pushed my hand out of the way to probe my side.
"Your so right." I groaned, twisting in my seat to stretch. His thumb carefully pressed into the muscle, doing a better job at massaging it then I had. " I couldn't help it, my brain came up with the imagine if you in those little tighty whities." I confessed, chuckling a little. He scoffed at me but didn't move his hand.
"I should be offended that you would laugh at that, but no I do not wear those." He rolled his eyes, and slowly the cramp relaxed. I straightened in my seat and relaxed also.
"Thank god. Im sorry but there is nothing sexy about those." He shook his head, giving me a disappointed look and took his hand away.
"What about boxer briefs? Sexy or not?" I totally pictured him in a pair of black boxer briefs, the material hugging his body like a second skin.
"Definitely sexy." I said, grinning at him. He sighed but smiled back.
"Let's go before someone shows up." He slipped out of the car, making it over to my side in a second and opening my door. I slung the bag across my back and then he did the same to me. I clamped my arms and legs around his body, and then he was off. I faintly heard the car beep as he locked it before he was a blur in the woods. The dry air whipped around me as he ran, twisting my hair and stinging my cheeks for only a couple minutes before we were in our meadow. He reached for me before I had the chance to climb down, setting me down in front of him. The sun danced off his face, throwing rainbows around the opening. He took the bag from me, opening it and taking out its contents, laying the blanket down on the ground and sitting upon it. I kicked off my sandals, joining him on the blanket. He took the sunblock out, inspecting it and reading the back.
"You know she is quite useful, I would have forgotten this and then she would have skinned me alive when you were burnt at the wedding." I held my hand out, intending to take it from him to apply it but he held still.
"Would it be okay if I did it?" He asked. Im not sure why it surprised me, given what he'd done last night. I guess I just figured what we did in my bedroom stayed there, but that didn't make any sense when I thought about it.
"Of course." I said quickly, I didn't want him to take my pause as a bad sign.
"Come here." He said softly.
Heart beating loudly for no good reason, I scooted closer till I was only inches away. He squirted a glob into his palm and placed it down, picking up my hand and started rubbing it into my forearm. His hands were gentle while he worked but firm, slowly moving up my arm and spreading the white cream until my whole arm and hand was covered. He did the same with my other hand and arm, completely covering it. He gently grasped my ankle, untucking it from where it I had it and pulling my leg out straight. I quickly did the same with the other one, and he followed his routine, squirting the lotion on his hands and working it into my skin, starting down at my feet and working up to my thigh. His hands dipped just slightly under the hem of my shorts, and I caught his smirk at my stuttering heart. Once the front of my legs were covered he adjusted, moving up on his knees and coming closer to my face. He squirted a smaller amount and kissed my lips once before pulling back. He carefully started on my cheeks and my eyes closed, savoring the feel of his cool hands against my face. He was careful around my eyes but was very thorough. His hands left me for a moment, and then were replaced on my throat. My eyes opened and I watched him, his eyes wholly on his task, his hands slowly moving down my throat and across my shoulders. He pushed the straps to the side, making sure to get under them and then replaced him. His eyes met mine briefly and then his hands eased passed my collarbone and down the exposed part of my chest. There wasn't a whole lot on display, but he slowed down, taking extra care, his fingers slowly working the lotion to the very edge of my top. I knew my pulse was pounding at his closeness, but I didn't care. His fingertips ghosted just slightly under the hem, brushing against the edge of my bra before dipping out again. Then he was suddenly behind me, moving my ponytail over my shoulder and massaging more sunblock into my back. I don't know how he made something like applying sunblock so sensual, but I was turned on, taking deep breaths and trying to refrain from jumping on him.
"Lay on your stomach." He instructed, I glanced at him over my shoulder, but he was so focused, his gaze heavy.
I did as he asked, moving to my stomach and tucked my arms underneath my chin. Again his cool hands started at my feet and slowly worked their way up my calf, his smooth hands kneading my muscles as he went, up the back of thigh, his fingertips dipping under my shorts again, then moving on to the next one. Once he was done he laid beside me on his side, his head propped unto his hand.
"You know what I didn't consider." He said, sounding grumpy again. I stayed where I was, relaxed and warm under the sun.
"I can't kiss your skin now." He said and actually pouted. I frowned also, cause that was a shame.
"But I did get an idea for our next practice. Unless you had one." I shook my head, not caring who's turn it was anyways.
"Im out of ideas, yours are better anyways." He smiled at that, leaning in to kiss my lips softly. I kissed him back, turning onto my side, my hands moving to his torso, but his thick hoodie kept his skin from mine. I pulled back and eyed it, picking at the material with my fingers. His hand lifted my chin up to meet his face, his eyes liquid gold.
"What is it?" I pushed my lower lip out, giving him puppy eyes and tugged on his sweater.
"Can you take this off?" He didn't hesitate before pulling away and sitting up, sliding the material over his head to reveal a soft baby blue button up shirt with short sleeves. He laid back down and I moved, easing my torso forward so I was resting on his chest, his back against the ground. Both hands came up to cradle my body, one resting on my upper back and the other on my lower. When I leaned down to kiss him again he spoke before I could.
"Wait." I frowned, wondering what was wrong. I hadn't crossed any lines, my hands were harmlessly on him, one resting on his chest and the other near his head, my fingers playing with the long strands.
"What's wrong?" One hand came up to cup my face, his thumb stroking my cheek softly.
"Nothing, there was an idea I have been thinking about and I want to discuss it." This drew me up short, I hadn't expected our practicing to go beyond my bedroom. Even more then that I was surprised by how eager he seemed to be to push forward.
"Okay." I said, not knowing what it could be but willing. His thumb moved, brushing across my lower lip, his eyes trailing down to watch the move.
"I want to kiss you…properly, but I need you to keep away from my teeth. Can you do that?" His eyes moved to mine, watching for my reaction. I know he felt my heart take off against his chest when I thought of his words. How many times had I wanted to open my mouth against his and know what his tongue felt like?
"I can do that." I said, holding his gaze.
"Good." He whispered, that one word sounding both severe and divine.
His fingers slid back to cup my head and he pulled me down to his mouth. At first his lips were stone on mine, but slowly they parted, his tongue running lightly against my lower lip. I stayed calm and followed his lead, parting my lips and allowing him entry. His hand moved to rest against my throat, his thumb stroking my jaw. Slowly, as if he was testing himself, his tongue swept gently into my mouth and stroked my own. I moaned a little at the feel of the new sensation, pressing closer to his body. His hand eased my face back till he could meet my gaze, his eyes hot on mine in a way that had my body overheated.
"Is that okay for you?" He asked. I let out a laugh, cupping his perfect face in my hands and quickly kissing his mouth before pulling back.
"Yeah, it's okay for me." He gave me a very easy smile, his hand moving from my face to my back.
"It's okay for me to."
"Oh good." I said, repressing a laugh at his words.
I leaned back down, hoping for another body melting kiss and got just that, his tongue slowly exploring my mouth for who knows how long. Eventually he pulled away and I moved to lay back down on the blanket. He stayed close, some part of his body near always touching mine. I placed my arm over my eyes to drown out the light, his hand in my other one as he quietly sung his favorite songs throughout the decades. I listened to the soft melody of his voice, happy to be in his presence for such a long, uninterrupted time. As the afternoon wore on I started to feel the heat and eventually I eased closer to his body. He paused, having moved on to repeating his favorite poems, and lifted my arm.
"Are you okay?" He eyed my flushed face, his turning concerned.
"Im fine, just getting hot." All I needed was to get closer to him and I would be fine. He placed his hand on my forehead and frowned.
"Your overheating." He was up in a second, holding his hand out for me to take.
"Im fine." I tried again, but he only ignored me. Sighing, I took his hand and allowed him to pull me up.
"I don't want to leave." I said firmly. I didn't care how hot it was here, this was the only place we could truly be alone.
"I was not planning to take you home." He said, moving to pull me onto his back.
"Then what are we doing?" I ask.
"Going for a swim." He says, picking up my bag before taking off.
I tuck my head against his back so I don't get wind burn on my face, thinking over his words. I have enough time to get nervous, my cheeks pink, when he stops and puts me down. I glance around the area, the trees are thick and tall, surrounding a small pond that's about thirty feet in diameter. The water looks surprisingly clear, being fed by a stream further up. Thick moss grows all the way up to the bank, thought the section right in front of us has a couple inches of sand, creating a tiny little beach. Im thankful the ground is clean cause I didn't put on my shoes, but I walk over to the water, peering down into it. I can't see the bottom, and Im nervous about what could be living in it.
"Are you sure it's safe?" I ask, turning to look over my shoulder at Edward. He's observing me, his eyes moving down my bare legs and then up to my face at my question.
"It is safe. Nothing alive will come near you if I am in there." He says, making me feel slightly better. He steps forward, moving his hands to the buttons on his shirt and begins to undo them. I stare openly as he moves with ease, never missing a single button until his shirt is open and he slips it off his shoulders.
"It is deeper than it looks however." He says, laying his shirt over a boulder nearby.
"Have you been in?" I ask, turning fully to watch him.
"Yes, years ago Emmett and I were out hunting and he tried to push me into the water. I heard him coming, but as I dodged him he just managed to grab my hand and pull me along with him. It was the same day I found the clearing." He walked closer to me, his eyes not leaving mine until he was right in front of me.
"Do you want to get in?" He asked softly. I looked back at the water, then up into his face. Swallowing down the slight uncertainty I felt I nodded, stepping back and reached for the edge of my top. His hand covered mine, stopping me.
"May I?"
"Y-yeah." He didn't move, just watched my face for another moment. I wasn't sure what he was looking for, so I stayed still also, afraid to push him in case it broke the spell. Finally his eyes left mine, releasing me from his penetrating gaze and I let out shaky breath. His gaze trailed down my body, coming to rest on the edge of my shirt, were one hand was holding the thin material. My hands fell uselessly to my side, waiting. I sucked in a quite breath when his hands slid under my shirt, his cold fingers brushing against my bare stomach, trailing over my waist, then finally pulling my top up. My arms moved on instinct as he pulled it over my head, careful of my ponytail and then turned to carefully lay it over his own shirt on the boulder. I took a tiny step back when he was turned, needing room to gather my wits. Not enough time, cause a second later his eyes were on me and I wasn't prepared for the heavy look of desire that settled on his face as he roamed my exposed flesh. I should feel vulnerable, or shy at the least, but that look on his face was the end of my insecurities, at least in this moment. I couldn't stop myself from stepping forward, moving slowly so I didn't startle him but reaching up and taking his beautiful face in my hands. His burning eyes returned to me, his hands resting on top of mine.
"I never imagined getting to see that look on your face."
"What look?" He asked gently, his voice soft with emotion.
"Such…want and desire." I admitted. He gave me one of those heartbreaking smiles and eased his hands down my forearms, his thumbs stroking my warm skin.
"Iv told you."
"I know you have." I said quickly, cutting him off and explaining. "but hearing it and physically seeing it is something else entirely."
"Do you believe me now?" I couldn't help but smile at him. I leaned in, softly pressing my mouth to his and pulled back.
"Yes." He pulled me back in, kissing me harder than I had kissed him, his mouth firm and insistent on mine. With a will power that I didn't know I possessed I groaned and gently pushed him away.
"Don't kiss me like that or i'm going to rethink the whole waiting till marriage thing." I said, half joking. With that crooked smile he stepped back and released me.
"I contemplated that same thought a moment ago." He said, eyes sweeping over me again.
He took another step back and kicked off his shoes, then pulled his socks off. I stood and watched him, not caring if I wasn't supposed to be. He was too beautiful to look away from him, especially when he reached for his jeans, popping the button free and pulling the zipper down. When I finally had the courage to glance up I caught his gaze riveted on me, watching me watch him. My cheeks burned at being caught staring, but he only gave me that new small flirty smile and pushed his jeans down his legs, stepping out of them and leaving them near the others. I didn't even try to not look, his legs were pale like the rest of his body, light hair scattering his lower legs, the muscles more defined in his thighs then I would of thought. His boxer weren't black like I had imagined, but a dark grey, snug against his body and emphasizing certain…things. He cleared his throat, an unnecessary need for him but pulling my attention away from his body and to his face anyways.
"Your turn." He said, giving me a raised brow and glancing down. Ignoring the burning in my cheeks I rushed through the motions of unbuttoning my shorts and pushing them down my legs, kicking them off and onto the ground. I didn't meet his eyes this time but turned around and leaned over the end of the pond, peering down into it.
"How do you thin-" I was cut off by the feel of his arms around me and then I was flying through the air and landing in the freezing cold water of the pond. He released me right away and I kicked up toward the surface, gasping in a breath and spinning to look for him.
"You little shit!" I shouted, searching but there was nothing. He hadn't surfaced yet. I treaded water, shivering at the temperature of the pond.
"Edward!" I yelled, not knowing where he was. Suddenly something wrapped around my ankles and pulled me under. He immediately released me, and when I resurfaced this time he was right in front of me.
"That was mean! I wasn't ready and this water is freezing." I complained, swimming backward and splashing water at him. It hit him square in the face, but he merely swiped it off with his hand and grinned.
"Once you felt the temperature I knew you wouldn't get in."
"Yeah not shit." I said but laughed anyways. My foot brushed something slimy, and he only roared with laughter when I shrieked and jolted back towards him.
"What the hell was that!" I demanded, swimming in circles and peering down into the darkness. I could see mostly down to my legs, but under that was murky.
"Probably just algae Bella, relax." He said, still chuckling at me. I glowered at his smile, and he grinned wider.
"If I came over there and tried to drown you would I succeed?" I asked. Obviously I knew I wouldn't, but still the thought itself was tempting.
"You can try." He all but purred at me. I swam closer and put my hands on his shoulders, pushing down. Surprisingly his head disappeared down into the water, and I prepared for him to grab me and drag me down with him. Instead his arms wrapped around my hips, and he shot up again, holding me tightly to his chest above the water. He was grinning again, his head tilted backward to see my face. I flushed at how close he was to my chest in this position, my nipples were hard from the cold water, but his eyes stayed on my face.
"You did that on purpose." I accused.
"I'm just protecting you from the slimy bottom."
"So gallant." I said, breaking into a smile myself. I couldn't help it when he was in this kind of mood, it was addicting.
"Well you know me, always the gentleman." He said seriously. I wrapped my arms around his neck, grinning at him.
"Whatever would I do without you." I shivered a little and he frowned, his arms loosening and setting me back down into the water.
"I am sorry I didn't realize." I shook my head and held on tighter, my chest pressing into his.
"Im fine." The words didn't have much sway since my body betrayed me and shivered again.
"No you're not." He tried to ease me away from him but I held firm, wrapping my legs around his waist so he couldn't get me off.
"Bella." He said sternly. I glanced around and pointed to the other side of the pond where the sun was shining across the surface.
"Go over there." He gave me another serious look and I rolled my eyes.
"Pleasseee." I said sweetly, sticking out my lower lip. He let out a low growl that vibrated his chest and then I felt his arms moving around me, swimming us both towards the sunny patch. The water was slightly warmer here with the sun beating down on it, even though his body was still ice cold.
"See, that's better." I said. He wasn't impressed, even if he was no longer trying to pry me off him.
"You are still cold." He pointed out. I quirked my brow at him and fought the blush from my face.
"How do you know i'm cold?" I ask, a challenge in my voice.
"Do you really need me to point it out?" He asked teasingly.
"There are other reasons for that you know."
"And the shivering?" I tightened my arms, leaning in closer to his face but leaving a breath between our lips.
"Also other reasons." I whispered.
"You are so full of it." He whispered back. "Five minutes then we get out." I grinned and instead of leaning in that last inch I let him go, ducking under the surface and swimming away. I reappeared a couple feet away, glancing over my shoulder and seeing his stunned face.
"That was mean!" He called after me. I turned around, moving to float on my back, my body rising to the surface.
"So was jumping in with me." I said, the sound muffled to my ears that were under water, but I knew he could hear perfectly. I floated around for a moment before taking a peak at him, he hadn't moved from his spot, just observing me.
"Can you float?" I asked curiously. He smiled and moved closer, his body about a foot away.
"No, I am to dense, I'll just sink."
"What if you held your breath?" He laughed a little at my random curiosity.
"I would still sink."
"Hmm...what else can't you do?" My body slowly spun on the surface, my shoulder bumping into his side. His hands moved to under my shoulders, and he shifted so my head was near his chest, his head bowing in front of my view.
"There is nothing I can't do that a normal man can." My brows shot up at his comment, my curiosity rocketing with all the things a normal man could do. My face flushed and he chuckled.
"Some I wouldn't dare to try while you are still human, but I could do none the less."
"Like what." I asked, desperate to know. His eyes swept down my body briefly, then back up to my eyes.
"Certain intimate…acts, let's say, would be too dangerous." When I didn't say anything he went on, his fingers against my skin feeling electric.
"Like if my mouth were to be on a delicate part of you." He said, his voice low and seductive. I felt a shiver go down my spine and knew he felt it also, but he didn't say anything about me being cold.
"And that's a…no go?" I asked to clarify, but holy dam did I want to so badly. Just the idea of that act had my body humming with pleasure. His eyes wandered again, and I wanted to know what had him so transfixed.
"Unfortunately, that's a no go…for now." His eyes met mine again, and I was sure that the feeling was reciprocated.
"What else?" It suddenly felt very important to know what was a possibility with the wedding only five days away. One of his hands moved to brush my neck, trailing the cold water onto already dried skin.
"I'm not too sure, it is hard for me to consider what's possible from what was previously a hard no." I should feel bad for pushing, but I couldn't stop myself from asking.
"Can you try?" He stared into my eyes for an immeasurable amount of time. Then his hand cupped the back of my head, and he leaned down further to kiss me gently, one lingering kiss before he pulled back.
"I am almost certain I'll be able to touch you with my hands. Im…hopeful, that I will be able to control myself enough to make love to you." Though his words were amazing, and I wanted that, I felt my brows pull down some in concern. He noticed.
"What is it?" He asked gently.
"All of those are…amazing, but what about you?" I shouldn't be surprised that all of his fears and focus were on me, but I was now concerned that I wouldn't be allowed to touch him or something.
"What about me Bella? All I truly want is to be able to please you." He said earnestly. I lowered my body into the water and twisted back to face him.
"Like I said, that's all great. You won't hear me complaining about that, but all your mentioning is me. Are you saying I won't be able to touch you at all? Cause Im not okay with that." His expression smoothed out and he pulled me into his arms, his hands reaching for my legs and pulling them around his waist.
"I'm not saying that at all, of course you can if that is what you want Bella." I almost scoffed out loud at his statement.
"Obviously I want to." I said. He smiled and used his hands on my thighs to pull me higher up his body.
"Just like with our practice thought you will need to go slow, no sudden movements. I need to be able to prepare myself, it's the only way I can control my response." I weaved my hands into his hair, holding him to me and wishing it was five nights from now.
"Is there anything in the hard no category?" His mouth opened and then closed, his lips pursued in an expression I didn't see from him often. Was he…embarrassed?
"What is it?" I asked, my head tilting with curiosity.
"I am worried ill either say something that you've never thought about and offend you or potentially give you ideas." My head fell back on a laugh, I couldn't help it. The idea of his giving me ideas was honestly just to amusing, I was sure there was nothing he could say that I hadn't contemplated in some way.
"Please don't worry about offending me. I assure you i'm not that sensitive." He still seemed oddly reluctant to speak whatever was on his mind, and while there was still a small part of me that was nervous there was a bigger part that thought we were passed this.
"Communication remember? I can't help you if you don't tell me what you need." I said gently, holding his gaze. His mouth tilted up on one side in a small smile, but he nodded.
"You are right. The line for myself is the same one I have to draw for you. For different reasons but any oral pleasure is off the table." I nod so he can see that I'm taking this seriously, even if I can't stop the image from taking root in my mind.
"Can I ask why?" It wasn't that I was unhappy about it, honestly I didn't possess the confidence to even try something like that with him, whether I wanted to or not. I would probably choke myself and die. I repressed a laugh at my last though and tried to rid my mind from dirty images.
"I don't think that I would be able to…control myself…if you were to attempt something like that." One hand came up and stroked my jaw, as if feeling the delicate bone and confirming his thoughts. "It's just too dangerous." I placed my hand over his, holding it to my cheek.
"I can agree to that. For now." I said, smiling at him. He smiled back but still looked slightly troubled.
"Bella, I hope you know I would never expect or ask something like that of you. I only ever want you to do what you are comfortable with." I turned my head and kissed his palm lightly.
"I know. I wouldn't do something I didn't want to, but I don't want you to not bring something up just because you don't think I won't want to. I want you to be able to bring anything up and then we can discuss it together." He leaned in and kissed me quickly.
"Deal." He agreed, pulling back.
"So just to clarify, my mouth cannot go past what point?" I asked, fighting a smile. He flashed me a sexy smirk and took one of my hands, easing his body back from me and placing my palm open on his chest. He pulled it down gently, slowly moving over every muscle and ridge and came to a stop on his abdomen, right over that happy little trail. Not only was my hand so close to him, but his was dangerously close to where my core rested.
"Your mouth? No further than here…your hands? That's a different story." He whispered, eyes blazing into mine with desire. I had to force myself to remember that we still had five more days to go.
"Do you have any hard lines that I need to know?" While I appreciated his thoughtfulness, there was nothing I could think that I would not enjoy him doing to me.
"If I say no does that make me easy?" I tried to joke. He cracked a small smile and let my hand go, but I didn't move. His palm shifted to my thigh, his thumb brushing the skin near his hip.
"Nothing about this is easy Bella. Not our love and certainly not the way I want you." I tipped my forehead against his chest, breathing heavily. My fingers played with that small strip of hair, desperately wanting to move down but I think that was a line he didn't want crossed before the wedding.
"We should stop before I push another boundary." I whispered, hating myself a little as I said it. He sighed, a very reluctant sound and I laughed.
"Trust me, I know. Five more days."
"How ever will I survive?" He asked.
I felt him shift around me, bringing us closer to the bank. His hands both moved to under my thighs, and he dipped down lower into the water before lifting me up and onto the edge of the pond. I suddenly felt very exposed in my soaked underwear and bra, but before I could get to embarrassed he pulled himself out also, sitting beside me, also sporting wet boxers, and a very prominent erection. I looked up quickly, but he had caught me, and my cheeks turned bright red. His head tipped back, and he laughed, which really was just not funny.
"If I was a vampire id push you into the pond." I grumbled.
"Im sorry my love, I couldn't help it. You were so confident when we were discussing oral sex but you turn bright pink at the evidence of my desire for you." I rolled my eyes and leaned back onto my hands, ignoring him and soaking in some more of the sunshine.
"Im ignoring you." I said stiffly. His hand brushes my neck, sweeping my wet hair back from my shoulder.
"Tell me what has you blushing Bella." I peak at him and narrow my eyes.
"You know what."
"No, I mean specifically. Why does seeing me turn you pink?" I shrug my shoulders, not really knowing why myself.
"I don't know, it was just forbidden for so long and I'm curious. Which is probably a weird thing to be curious about so…"
"It is not odd to be curious about my body, though I do not think that word does justice to the way I feel about yours, I still understand it. What I mean is I am just as fascinated with your physical response to me as you are me to you."
"You are?"
"Of course. My brain works much faster than yours does Bella, I can catalog every response your body has to anything I do while still maintaining a conversation with you."
"It's so unfair the way you can read me and your always so good at maintaining your cool." His brow raised and he glanced down briefly before returning my gaze.
"Bella I have very little control on the way my body responds to you, I have just become adept at hiding it from you." I frowned at that.
"Why did you?" My gaze wanders downward again, taking another peak at the defined shape.
"It wasn't appropriate before, and I felt that you didn't need the encouragement." Was it normal that he looked so…long?
"Bella?" My head snapped up again, catching his eyes. He had totally seen me staring.
"Yes?" I cleared my throat, trying to not turn the color of an actual tomato and failing.
"You can just ask me you know, if you have questions." I blew out a breath and flopped backwards onto the ground.
"No way, that's just too weird."
"Why? You have already pointed out that I can read your body, it is only fair you get to ask and have answered your own questions." I thought about his words, but in the bright light of the day I couldn't get myself to ask. I shook my head, not looking at him in case he tried to persuade me. I would much rather find out those questions for myself anyway.
"Not right now, thank you thought." He acquiesced, not pushing me any further. A couple minutes later I got up and dried off and we dressed again before moving back to the meadow where I ate the food Alice had packed for me and then laid back down, Edward reciting his favorite books until I asked so many questions that he started reading one of them out loud from memory.