Multiversal Nexus Short: The Return of Bobby Blabby(Ed Edd n Eddy, an idea given by G-Man 2.0 on FF Dot Net)
The three Eds were in line to get a newspaper for the day, behind Spongebob and Ilana "Lunis". Behind them was Throttle, a member of the Biker Mice from Mars and the 1987 counterpart of Raphael.
Once those two finished grabbing their papers, the Eds grabbed one. Of course, several stories were seen.
The main article was one that included pictures of the Fantastic Four. "Fantastic Four make their debut in the smash hit Marvel Rivals" the headline said. Under it was "Susan storms out in front as fan favorite character" with "Hawkeye, Hela receive the nerf hammer" in a smaller corner with details about the Fantastic Four's debut below the main headline of the story.
On the left was a smaller headline that said "Act III of Destiny 2's Revenant Storyline began yesterday, but does anyone care?" below it was a picture of Fikrul, the Scorn Fanatic.
Below it was a more-detailed headline around the same size as a first that said "Shadow continues to smash through his film debut in latest Sonic movie; Disney bullying theaters with Mufasa?"
On the right was another story that said, "More Star Wars Battlefront III info Uncovered; Unreleased Wii Build Leaked Online and Is Playable Alongside Already Present Xbox Build. Playstation 3 Version Soon?" Pictures of Clone Troopers X1 and X2 fighting alongside their fellow clones against Drones in what was clearly a rough unfinished picture due to the game being unfinished was shown.
Below was a slightly more detailed story that said "Marvel VS Capcom Infinite continues to surge with an unlikely revival. And it's all thanks to Maximilian Dood and modders…. Not Capcom." Pictures of Marvel VS Capcom Infinite Beyond with Zero, Dante and others was shown along with a picture of a smiling Maximilian Dood.
Finally, there was a poll that asked, "Which characters do you want to see added to Marvel Rivals the most?"
"That's it?" Eddy said, unimpressed.
"A gaming focused newspaper today. I can see why it might not be preferable to everyone." Double D said.
"That ain't the problem. This newspaper has been boring for almost two months! What the heck happened to the action!? The drama? Who the heck cares about this crap?"
"Well, you can't expect major events to happen every day."
"Look Eddy! There's a hedgehog on a motorcycle!" Ed said, pointing to Shadow.
"Forget the stupid hedgehog. And by the way Double D. Two months? Two!? Nothing new, nothing interesting. Nothing major?"
"For some, these stories may be major." Double D replied.
"Well they ain't for me. And I say we do somethin' about it."
"Taking initiative. Great! Be the change you want to be Eddy."
"You're comin' along sockhead. And don't worry, when this is all said and done, we'll all benefit from it. Even our pockets."
"Of course…." The second Eddy mentioned money, he knew he was in for one heck of a day.
"Can I come too Eddy?" Ed asked.
"Duh. Who else is gonna pass out the papers?" Eddy answered.
The Next Day….
Sokka was getting his laundry after leaving it hung out to try on a clothesline. But for whatever reason, several people were giving him looks. As odd as he thought it was, ignored it and continued to get his clothes.
"Look, I get it, she's not bad lookin', but really?" Vinnie, another member of the Biker Mice said to him, folding some pants.
"Oh, you're talking to someone else." Sokka said.
"Actually, I'm talking to you."
"Yeah well Suki's off the table, sorry."
"Wait, she already got with someone else?"
"Uh, no? We're still together."
Vinnie laughed. "You're a real comedian."
"I'm not trying to be funny. For once."
"Dude, at least own up to it. Lying ain't exactly a good look for you." The Storm Hawks' ace marksman, Finn said to him.
"I'm not!"
"Oh yeah? This says otherwise. Ka-blam! Caught on camera buddy!" Finn said, putting the newspaper of the day in front of him.
"Loyal to his tribe, but not to his girlfriend. Water tribe warrior caught kissing Bushinryu practitioner Maki Genryusai." Sokka read with a picture of him kissing the blonde being shown. "What!? This is a load of baloney! I never did this!"
"Picture tells a different story bro."
"Whatever. Once I finish this, I'm clearing the air with Suki. I don't want any misunderstandings between us."
The 2012 version of Raphael was seen at a shake shop and was next in line to order. "Give me-"
"Next!" The person behind the counter called out.
"Yeah, that's me."
"NEXT IN LINE!"
"Hello? I'm right here!"
"Sorry, we don't serve people who take joy in hurting animals and children. And before you try to deny it like I don't know any better, I read today's paper."
"The paper? Let me see that." He reads the headline on the side in question. "Hotheaded bully pounds kid and his dog for beating him in air hockey!? I wasn't even at the arcade yesterday!"
"For your sake, I hope you leave."
Raphael notices some of the other patrons giving him looks.
"Great…." Rather than pouring fuel onto the fire he decides to just leave.
The secret WOOHP spy, Clover Ewing, had just finished going for a jog around the park. Unfortunately, she forgot to bring water with her. So, she had to spend a bit of money to buy a drink at the vending machine. After choosing a blue Powerade, she paid for it, took said drink from the bottom area of the machine and left to sit down on a bench to drink it.
If she had to be honest, it was pretty serene to hear the only background noise being maybe a few cars in the far off distance, but mostly people talking, running along with birds, squirrels, and a few dogs. Of course, that serenity would be broken seconds later by a passerby.
"Wow, your butt's smaller in person." Timmy Turner said to her, newspaper in hand.
"Excuse me!? And your sense of manner's just as small kid. And what the heck do you mean by 'in person'?"
"Here!" He replied, pointing to the newspaper story and opening it up to another page for a bigger detailed picture. "You didn't read the newspaper?"
She gets the newspaper from him to get a better look. "No. I get my news on…" She gasped. "Augmented!?" Clover's face gradually turned red as she scrunched up the newspaper.
"Hey! I paid 25 cents for that!"
Her face turned red wasn't out of embarrassment, but anger before she yelled out loud, causing Timmy to cover his ears. The yelling also got the attention of others.
And these shocking stories seemed to have continued for days. And back at the printing press where this was held, the newspaper seemed to have been making a killing since this new surge of shocking events.
Eddy laugh. "Yes siree! I told ya we'd make reading the newspaper great again."
"More like ruining the integrity of it. When you said you were going to write interesting stories I thought you were going to try to actually go out and find some. Not misconstrue real events!" Double D said.
"It ain't misconscrewing anything. All these newspapers do a bit of exaggeration. That's how you draw people in."
"Pick paper up! Pick paper up! Pick paper up!" Ed said, casually throwing papers into the wall as they came off the press for him to put into the newspaper racks.
"That's misconstrue Eddy." Double D corrected. "And this is more than just exaggeration. These are just complete lies! You haven't improved at all since the last time you did this!"
"What you just said was a complete lie. I did improve. And learn. How come these look so much more believable?" Eddy countered, showing the latest big headline which had Huey Freeman with a gun in his hand in a store, with the headline implying that he was robbing it as people were down on the ground.
"Because this time you're using real pictures but telling a different story. And in some cases, slightly editing them. That's called being misleading."
"Look, if this really does make any misunderstandings, people can always clear it up. I mean, look what happened with Suki, Maki and Sokka. That got cleared up real quick. Problem solved! Besides, I only said I was gonna do it for a week and then cash out and dip. They're on their own to keep it interestin' after that. You know, carry on the legacy."
A buster shot busted down the door of the room they were in. The source being Bass. With him also was Vegeta, Suki, Noelle, Clover, Mandy(Totally Spies) and Chazz Princeston.
"Alright, I'm only going to say this once. Tell us where and who Bobby Blabby is!" Vegeta demanded.
"Bobby Blabby? There's no Bobby Blabby here silly!" Ed replied.
"Yeah, what he said." Eddy said.
"Then where is he!?" Clover asked.
"Your guess is as good as mind blondie."
"That might be enough for these dopes, but that ain't enough info for The Chazz!" Chazz declared before grabbing Double D. "Alright buddy, you're the only that hasn't said a word. So it's either one of two things. It's either you, or you know somethin'!"
"It's not me! I never write such deceiving stories!" Double D insisted.
"Likely story pal! Look at this! Look what this paper said about me!" Chazz said, putting yesterday's newspaper in his face after putting him down.
"Edgar Allen Princeton tries to woo girl with poem but fails horribly?"
"I never wrote that!"
"Dude, we saw you trying to smooth talk Alexis with that lame poem. That one's actually real sadly enough." Eddy said before laughing.
"You think that's funny!?"
"Why wouldn't it be?" He replied before continuing to laugh again.
"Wait, how do you know that that particular one out of all of them are real?" Noelle asked.
"Duh, because I actually heard him do it."
"Spying on the Chazz huh? Sounds like you're in cahoots with Bobby Blabby!" Chazz declared before being pushed out of the way by Clover to get in Eddy's face.
"Forget that poem! You must have went to Bobby Blabby with that lie about my butt! It is not augmented! For your information if I really wanted a bigger butt I'd just do squats." She said to him.
"Blabby said that I spend time volunteering in the library!" Mandy complained.
"Uh….. how is that a bad thing?"
"Because I wouldn't be caught dead doing that! Not with my free time!"
"Oh. Fair point."
"I fail to see what is wrong with volunteering your time with the library." Double D said.
"Everything is wrong with that! I'm not Sam!" Both yelled at him simultaneously before they looked at each other. "Ew, stop copying me!"
"You're copying me!" Clover said. "Sam is my friend!"
"Why would I want to be friends with her? That has nothing to do with it! If anything, all three of you are lame!" Mandy countered. "Big butt!"
"If I have a big butt then you definitely have an even bigger mouth with how loud you whine. You sound like a banshee."
"WHAT WAS THAT!?"
"You heard me! Banshee!"
"Big butt!"
"Banshee!"
"Big butt!"
"MY BUTT IS NOT BIG!" Clover tackled her to the ground with Mandy kicking her in the face before they made a fight cloud.
"Get your hands off me! I just bought this shirt!"
"Good! Well let me pull on it some more!"
"Well let's see how many boys will want to go out with a big butted, bald eagle!"
"STAY AWAY FROM MY HAIR!"
"STAY AWAY FROM MY SHIRT!"
The two started to get into a fight around the room, with Vegeta and Bass only looking on with blank expressions on their face, unamused.
"Tch. Idiots. It's a miracle she was even able to get as far as she did when we were on the show together." Vegeta commented.
"THAT HURT!" Clover yelled.
"OH YEAH!? WELL I'LL MAKE SURE THIS HURTS EVEN MORE!" Mandy said.
"REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE GIANTS!? I'M GONNA POUND YOU INTO THE GROUND LIKE THEN TOO!"
"LAST TIME I CHECKED, I WON!"
"NO YOU DIDN'T YOU LIAR! YOU'RE JUST AS BAD AS BOBBY!" Both unknowingly took their fight outside the building with everyone seemingly watching the two fight. The Eds took this chance to try to get away but was stopped by Vegeta and Noelle.
"We're not through with you just yet." Vegeta said to them.
"There is nothing wrong with reading, no matter how those two make it seem. But there is something wrong with potentially breaking up relationships!" She then showed the story she was referring to to Eddy. "This story made it seem like Sokka was cheating on me! Thank goodness I didn't overreact and we cleared things up. But I can't say the same for anyone else this may have affected."
"Exactly! Look what this stupid has done!" Vegeta yelled. "Everyone think that just because we got into a disagreement and said 'it's over', Bulma and I are no longer together! Now I've had to send away a bunch of people trying to hit on her!"
"Well hey, that means more ladies get to hit on you, right?" Eddy said, trying to give some sort of positive before Vegeta picked him up.
"You think that's a good thing you moron!? It's annoying! I can't even go to the store in peace anymore! One of the damn cashiers even looked at me up and down instead of checking out my food so I could leave! 'You could use someone younger to keep up with your Saiyan Spirit'. You think I want to randomly hear that when I'm trying to figure out what apples to get!? I'll have all you idiots know that Bulma can keep up just as fine!"
"Well, I suppose your loyalty to your wife is definitely not in question." Double D said, blushing.
"Vegeta loves his wife Eddy!" Ed said, laughing.
"Yeah. Real Casanova." Eddy added.
"SHUT UP YOU PIN-HEADED IDIOTS!" Vegeta yelled, face red before Bass, seeing enough, grabbed Eddy.
"I'm sick of the rest of them wasting time! Tell us what everything you know about Bobby Blabby right now or you're going to draw your last breath!" Bass barked, gritting his teeth in anger as he held him at buster point.
"Look man! All I did was tell him a few things! I-I was an information guy! Double D, what's that word for the person that gives like info and secrets to people but gets paid for it?" Eddy said, sweating as he knew Bass was serious.
"I believe you're looking for informant." Double D said.
"Yeah! That's it! An informant!" Eddy said. "Please take it, please take it, please take it!" He repeatedly said in his hand.
"Then if you told him what you know, you know exactly what he looks like! Now describe his appearance!" Vegeta barked.
"Uh….. he's-"
"HURRY UP!"
"Okay! Okay! I'm trying to think!"
"Well think faster! The Chazz doesn't have-" Chazz started, joining in before Vegeta immediately cut him off.
"You shut up! We've got this covered!" Vegeta said, pointing at him.
"Jeez. No need to be rude."
Eddy frantically looked around. He knew he would have to lie and make up an appearance and fast. "I got it! He's short! W-with brown hair, brown pants. H-he wears a red tie and a black fedora! That's all I know! Can you please let me go now?"
"He told us what we needed to know. I think that's enough." Noelle said.
"Yeah. Bass, please put him down. You're really scaring him." Suki said.
"If we find out you're lying to protect him it's going to be a whole lot worse for you than just being scared." Bass warned him, putting him down.
"Trust me, I got the hint the first time around man." Eddy said. "Come on Double D, Ed, let's get outta here."
"But what about the newspapers Eddy?" Ed asked.
"What about em? We already told em what we need to know. We're done."
"But Eddy, no one's going to read our stories for the day! We'll be wasting paper! Trees Eddy!"
"Wait, your stories?" Noelle repeated, eyebrow raised, catching that last part.
"Yeah! They're the ones we helped Bobby make! You know, giving him info." Eddy lied.
"Ed, who is Bobby Blabby? Tell the truth and I'll buy whatever your favorite food is. Don't worry, Eddy and Double D will be safe. I just want to know." Noelle asked him.
Eddy continuously waved his arms and shook his head to try to get him to stop as Ed idly looked on.
"Bobby Blabby isn't here Noelle." Ed finally answered, shrugging.
"Really? Are you sure?"
"Eeyep."
"Hmm, okay. One more question and I promise that's it. I'll still get you your food no matter what you answer."
"Ask away!"
"Has Eddy ever called himself Bobby Blabby since being here?"
"Yes."
"ED!" Eddy yelled out.
"Thank you. That's all we need to know." Noelle said.
"Can I pick what I want to eat now?" Ed asked.
"So we have some liars huh?" Chazz said, picking up Double D, who was starting to look away, knowing he was about to experience pain. Loads of it.
"Chazz, you can let Double D go."
"What!? But why? The Chazz wants to-"
"Let him go."
"Noelle, all of them are liable for this." Suki said.
"Maybe so, but Eddy's he one that made the stories. He was the informant. Remember?"
"Ohhh. I see where you're coming from."
Vegeta stopped Eddy before he could attempt to sneak away.
"You're not going anywhere!" Vegeta said to him, picking him up by his dress shirt.
"Ed hasn't eaten his breakfast yet. Pair that to him not being the brightest and-" Eddy started, trying to weasel his way out but Vegeta wasn't buying any of it.
"Shut up before I kick you through this roof!" After hearing this, Eddy didn't dare utter another word. "Not only did you lie once, you lied multiple times! And almost got away with it! But that's not what ticks me off the most. You had to bring my wife into this! And dared to monetize it for your own gain!" Vegeta said before gritting his teeth and closing his eyes before putting him down. "I'll let the rest of them deal with you. Because if I lay a finger on you, I might end up killing you, as much as I might try not to. Even if the crap you pulled p*sses me off you're still just a child."
He turned around and prepared to leave. "But don't think you're getting off easy. I may have control over what I do but I have no say about what the others want to do to you. And judging by the reactions you created, I expect you to have a long day ahead of you." He turns his head a bit. "Noelle!"
"What is it?" She asked, surprised that Vegeta wanted to talk to her.
"What exactly did he write about you? If you're wondering why I'm asking, I'm just curious. You're the only one that hasn't said anything about it."
"If you must know, he said that I don't….. shave my legs."
"That's it?"
"Look, it might not be that important to you, but it is to me!" She said, blushing in embarrassment.
"That wasn't what I was implying. At the very least, it isn't something as stupid as what that idiot came in here for." Vegeta said before flying off.
"Ed, Double D, wait outside. We'll be right out." Noelle said to the two.
"Come on Ed, I really suggest we leave." Double D said, dragging him along.
"But what about the papers Double D?!"
"We'll pass those out!" Suki said. "And bring Eddy out too. We're just going to have a bit of a chat with him."
"Okay!"
"So, you think you can lie on The Chazz and get away with it huh? We'll see how you feel after we Chazz you up!"
"If you're going to say idiotic things like that can you please exclude us from it?" Noelle asked him.
He shrugged. "Suit yourself."
"That wasn't even a lie you idiot!" Eddy said to him.
"Shut your mouth!" Bass yelled.
"Now, let's get down to Chazzness." Chazz said, putting a hand in his fist as they approached Eddy.
"Would you please shut up!?" All of them said simultaneously.
"Jeez, no need to get-"
"Do you want to get beat up next!?" Noelle threatened him.
"Alright! Alright! Tough crowd."
Hours Later…..
The real newspaper was passed out for the day, with the main headline being "Bobby Blabby Exposed! Culprit From the Cul-De-Sac, Eddy, Forced to Apologize as He Was Hung to Dry, Literally!" A picture of Eddy on a clothesline apologizing to everyone was shown.
One Month Later…..
The main headline of the newspaper for the day had said "Eddy AKA Bobby Blabby, Forced to Work Under Everyone He's Lied About For One Month". Under it was a picture of him working and a couple of quotes from two of the people he's had to work under, those people being Bulma, Yami, Lance and Din, with pictures of them being shown. The first two of them having a bit of a smile on their face for the photos taken of them by their quotes.
"Oddly enough he's been pretty quiet and easy to work with. The exact opposite of what Vegeta described him as. If only he wouldn't have written all of those lies. I would have called him a sweetheart and chalked it up to Vegeta exaggerating like he does sometimes, but nah." – Bulma Briefs, Capsule Corp, Wife of Vegeta
"That pathetic idiot looked miserable the entire time he was here. But you know what? I don't feel sorry for him one bit. He made his bed by telling all of those [dumb] lies. And now he needs to lay in it. The entire time. Besides, maybe he'll learn a thing or two. He might not look it, but he's pretty resilient. I was surprised because I honestly expected him to want to quit ten minutes in. Whatever kills you doesn't make you stronger, right?"-Yami Sukehiro, Leader of the Black Bulls, Noelle's Magic Knight Squad
"He did what he was supposed to do while being here and didn't cause any trouble for me. That's all I really care about." -Din Djarin, Mandalorian
"To be honest, I don't have much of an opinion on what Eddy said in the paper. I just ignored it. But, Ilana insisted on him doing something around here to 'atone for his hurtful lies and rhetoric'. I don't remember anything major he did wrong, if anything so, I guess he did good."- Lance, Galaluna Royal Guard
"So, how would you rate your job experiences on a scale of 1 to 10?" Double D interviewed Eddy after he finished with his jobs for the month.
"No comment." Eddy answered begrudgingly before leaving. "Next time I'm gettin' my news online!"
"That's all folks!" Ed said, to the audience laughing as he pulled the black screen down like a pulldown projector screen.