Chapter 4. The Split

Day 106: We buried Denis and filled Diana and Angelina in on everything—that's what the two newcomers were named. I didn't dig into their life stories. Denis's death hit me pretty hard, even though I knew him the least. I didn't attend the funeral.
Day 107: I'm doing nothing useful. Just like in real life.
Day 108: Practicing archery. My skill is already perfect, but I don't feel like doing anything else.
Day 109: Made a cover for the diary. Can this count as something useful?
Day 110: Finally recovered from Denis's death. LSD said he ignored all safety measures and stupidly fell while working on the dot of the letter "i" What an idiot. Now I feel anger, not grief. What a complete moron.
Day 111: I saw LSD flirting with Angelina. It got me thinking... I wonder, is there sex in Minecraft? Genitals seem to be intact, so sex must be possible, but who knows. Obviously, there was nothing like this in the original game, but this isn't exactly the original.
I'll ask LSD if he succeeds. While I was busy wasting time, Michael and Diana started building a house. Right, we completely forgot about a house with all this survival business. 1 point to Diana.
Day 112: Everyone is busy with their own stuff. I'm the only one doing nothing. I'll start learning redstone. Mechanics seem promising.
Day 113: Learning the theory of redstone mechanisms. I really should've studied physics.
Day 114: LSD said there is sex. Noted. I don't know why I needed this information so badly, but now I know.
I'm still figuring out redstone. I got electrocuted. Didn't think redstone = electricity.
Day 115: Diana and Michael found and tamed a wild cat. Where did they find a jungle? I swear there are no jungles anywhere—I checked. Man, girls can find a cat everywhere, even during an apocalypse and in this weird world. I'm jealous, he is so cute. I want a pet too...
Wolves are supposed to spawn in tundras, right? Screw redstone for now, tomorrow I'll go look for one.
Day 116: My jealousy is nothing compared to Angelina's. She fed the cat zombie meat (no idea who or how made a plate for it), killing it. I saw it but didn't tell anyone. Like I said, I don't need us killing each other. I had a talk with Angelina. Under threat of exposing her, she promised to make amends and find another cat for Diana, who cried inconsolably all day. Damn, they're right—women cause nothing but problems. How jealous do you have to be to poison an innocent animal?
Day 117: Took some bread and headed out to find a tundra. The main thing is not to die of dehydration. Damn, I just realized thirst didn't exist in original Minecraft. That was great. I'll have to craft a bottle.
Day 118: No tundra in sight. I found a savannah and some rabbits. Cool. Rabbit stew for dinner. It's nice there's no fatigue in Minecraft, and I can walk all day in one direction.
The rabbits were tasty.
Day 119: Found a tundra. No wolves here. Damn! I'll search more thoroughly.
Day 120: It's cold. Diamond armor doesn't keep you warm. Why are there so many differences from the original Minecraft? How do you even craft a coat? I've explored almost the entire tundra.
Day 121: Found wolves. Funny—they were in the last part of the tundra I searched. I'm running out of ink again. I'll have to find a mini-squid to refill my pen. That's weird. I write pretty concisely, so where is all the ink going? Minecraft logic?
I tossed some bones to two wolves. Now they're tamed and following me. At least this system still works. I need to come up with names. No ideas yet.
Day 122: Heading back, thinking of names for the wolves. They look almost identical... Lolek and Bolek? Fred and George? Woopsie and Poopsie?
Day 123: Named them "Dmitry" and "False Dmitry." I'll glare disdainfully at anyone who confuses them. Though, to be honest, I haven't figured out how to tell them apart myself. Whatever. Almost back at the base.
Day 124: On the way back, Dmitry killed a zombie. I finally noticed the difference between the wolves: Dmitry has sharp teeth, and False Dmitry has dull ones. Michael and Diana finished building the house. It looks amazing. But the house is built for two people! Selfish!
They're officially a couple now too. I'm sitting here alone.
Whatever. Who needs a girlfriend anyway!
Day 125: LSD had a big fight with Michael. A serious one. I think the problem is Angelina. Maybe it's jealousy because of the house. I kept silent and didn't share my opinion. After the argument, LSD and his girlfriend moved far away from Michael and Diana's house. I had to choose who to stay with. I picked Michael and Diana. Angelina creeps me out a little.
Day 126: Changed my mind. Said goodbye to Michael and went to the farms. I'm better off alone. Spent the whole day working with redstone.
Day 127: Refilled my pen and decided to build a railway between Michael and Diana's house and LSD and Angelina's future home. Maybe it'll reconcile them. I'll need a lot of redstone and iron. Spent the entire day in the mine.
Day 128: Wolves need food. Damn it! False Dmitry nearly starved to death. If it weren't for his howling, I wouldn't have noticed. Some of my actions are pointless because I rely too much on the original Minecraft, and here the canon is slightly (very) off.

Michael gave me our farm, not even mentioning LSD. I thought it belonged to all three of us... It looks like there's been a split in the group. Why do they even keep fighting?
Day 129: Angelina insulted Diana. Michael shot an arrow at Angelina, missed, and then LSD attacked Michael. If not for my archery skills and knockback hits, there would've been a corpse - or maybe more than one. LSD seems mad at me now. He accused me of bias and unfairness.
I said that if anyone tries to attack someone again, I'll shoot all the attackers myself. I'm a master archer, so the threat worked.
Now Michael is mad at me too. It'll be funny if all four of them gang up on me later. My archery practice wasn't for nothing.
Conclusion: all problems are caused by women.
Day 130: Screw the railway. They're having a cold war over there. I'll build everything just for myself now.
Day 131: Michael found me and apologized. I made him promise to try to reconcile with LSD.
Built an infinite stone generator. Why? I already have tons of stone. Good question. Maybe to confirm that physics still doesn't apply in this world. After all, redstone only works because of it.
Day 132: Got inspired to build a chicken farm. Spent the whole day building.
Day 133: Automatic chicken farm is complete. Not bad for two days. I'm too tired (mentally). I'll test it tomorrow. I still need more chickens.

Day 134. The farm is working. Its principle is that chickens float in water and lay eggs, which roll down the water flow straight into a chest. By the way, I checked: if you drop eggs, they break. Why do chickens lay eggs almost every hour? I don't care.

Day 135. Saw an Enderman. Unfortunately, it saw me too. Arrows don't work on that bastard. If not for False Dmitry, I wouldn't have gotten away with just one wound. Now I have an Ender Pearl, which allows teleportation. I won't use it. I'll save it for emergencies.

Day 136. Went to the tundra. Need to collect snow and spruce tree seeds. The notebook wouldn't fit, so I'll leave it here.

Day 139 or 140. Managed to lose track of the days. Seriously, you have to be really dumb to lose count of sunsets and sunrises, especially since they're still here. All because I messed up my schedule, going to sleep at different times.
Interesting event: saw a skeleton riding a spider. I'd completely forgotten about those. Otherwise, the trip went smoothly. I gathered lots of snow and seeds. I could build a snow palace.

Let's call this Day 141. Lots happened today. I found the jungle where Diana and Michael discovered the cat. There were melons - gathered them and started a small farm. Melons are delicious.
I also found two pumpkins. Broke one into seeds and planted it. Used the other to make a snowman. How two blocks of snow and a pumpkin exist and function like this? I don't care. Doesn't interest me at all.
The creature came to life before my eyes, now it follows me around and shoots at hostile mobs. I'll call the snowman Agent 007.

"Unreadable" 142. Should've named it USSR. It collapsed this morning. Heh-heh! I don't know what came over me, but I spent the entire day trying to get a music disc from Creepers. Successfully. I don't remember how to make a jukebox. I hope it's some classical music. Anything but rap.

Day 143. Holy shit! It's actually rap! What the hell is going on?! Even in Minecraft, this depressing rap about a chicks found me! I traded the music disc and jukebox to Michael for potatoes. Both of us were happy with the trade. I've already planted the crop. I hope Michael doesn't know enough Russian to translate the song.

Day 144. Worked on farms. I now have a literally infinite food source.

Day 145. Went back to redstone. Setting up my "barn."

Day 146. The first mechanism is done. Now I have lighting in my "house," if you can call it that, controlled by buttons that turn lamps on and off.

Day 147. Trying to make a combination lock for an obsidian door. Three attempts—all failed. Too complicated.

Day 148. I need a guide to figure out how to make this lock… I'm too dumb for these mechanisms.

It's a lot a lot a lot more complicated than I thought.

Day 149. The combination lock is ready and tested. LSD came by. He said he saw some howling people with spears from a distance. Savages? I don't remember anything like that in the original.
Are spears even a thing in Minecraft? My namesake expressed concern about this and suggested we all meet once a week to discuss the news. He also tested the lock. After three hours, he still couldn't get into my house. He asked me to make him one. I proposed a trade: I'd build him a combination lock in exchange for full access to the XP farm. LSD refused and seemed upset again. Selfish jerk.
When did private property become a thing here, anyway? And how am I supposed to get arrows for my bow now? Screw capitalism, we need new USSR.

Day 150. I remembered some Minecraft experience and built several things at once: an enchanting table and a Nether portal. I also used feathers from my chickens (who, by the way, don't even fit in the farm anymore) and flint to make a ton of arrows. I made a small hole in my makeshift quiver for a flint and steel. Now I can shoot flaming arrows if I want. I destroyed the Nether portal immediately after building it. To hell with that place. Literally.
Started surrounding the enchanting table with bookshelves. Didn't finish yet.

Day 151. I was at level 227. Holy crap. Enchanted my bow for flame and power five. Perfect enchantments. Although now the hole for the flint and steel is useless, I guess. All my armor has protection, and my pants have projectile protection because skeleton pests are still a thing. My sword got Bane of Arthropods. Useless. I'll re-enchant it. Spent most of the day trying to figure out the language on the enchantments. Still no success. I have to admit, this language looks clearer than English.

Day 152. Emergency meeting. LSD's house was attacked. Angelina is on the brink of death. They managed to escape through a mine we all dug and memorized like the back of our hands. Diana and Michael refused to shelter the wounded, so both are now temporarily staying at my place. I have no idea how to help Angelina. The only thing that comes to mind is to feed her—maybe she'll regenerate on her own.

LSD is mourning.