Editor's Note (Lucius Walker): Yo! Hope ya'll are enjoying this fic. Also, we had to make a few edits because of some errors we realized we made.
Okay, so…ConstructiveCritiquer. Not quite the fitting name, really. Lemme break it down for you why:
"i tried to give this a shot but it's just bad. there are so many things that don't make sense, case among them, naruto having a second identity solely because people somehow can't pronounce his name is stupid."
Even though chakra doesn't exist in this fic, his mannerisms, tactics, and methods are still very much like a shinobi's. Granted, a very careless and poor example of one, but he does the bare minimum by NOT throwing out his real name willy-nilly to the public outside of Roanapur.
Also, have you stepped outside? Did you meet some people? Some either can't or won't pronounce Asian names correctly. Take my mother, for example. Her legal name is the English version of her Asian name, but since it is hard for some people to pronounce, spell, and remember her real name, she just gave herself another English name that everybody can pronounce, spell, and remember. It was supposed to be a little gag, but somebody got really heated over that for no reason. XP
Also, in case you couldn't figure it out, no, my username isn't my real name for the same reason why Naruto sometimes uses his alternate name.
…
"Rock's boss knowing Naruto makes zero sense,"
He doesn't KNOW him personally like they went to high school together. It'll be explained later, but Naruto built up quite a reputation in Japan, and not quite a good one. Patience, dude, patience.
…
"and Naruto getting mad at being called a pimp even though he is a pimp who owns a night club and sleeps with his girls"
Again, patience, dude. This ain't a novel, where you post the entire damn thing in one go. No, like watching a TV show, fanfiction is often written in a way where you only get one episode/chapter at a time, leaving you wondering and hoping for more to answer some questions. In this case, the said questions are why Naruto took it personally despite the fact that he is a pimp that does sleep with his own girls. And who's this "him" that made him momentarily angry at Rokuro for the accidental comparison? Gotta love how you didn't even mention that key part, although I suppose you were just trying to find ammo to stick it to us.
…
"and the sound effects breaking up chapters is cliche and critique."
Funny enough, this is actually one of your more legitimate and constructive criticism…if not for the fact that it's incomplete. Okay, sure, I'd be willing to chow down an actual serving of humble pie, but only if you tell me why it's better than the one I baked. In case you couldn't decipher what I'm saying, it's this: Tell us how to do better. Don't just tell us to do better. If you believe that something needs to be fixed, tell us how to do better. Don't say that something is ass without actually telling us how to improve with the intent of trying to help us improve. Otherwise, well, like I said before, you really don't live up to your username.
…
"you could salvage this story is to make severe edits, and drop the second name and the pimp shit, as well as Rock's boss knowing him."
You're being dramatic, claiming that we could "salvage" this story that barely began with your "criticisms" being about something that's arguably not even true. I already explained the 2nd name thing, the pimp thing, and Rock's boss knowing his thing.
Don't call yourself a "constructive critiquer" if not only you can't be polite and professional about it, but you're not that great at it yourself.
AmusedLight: Thanks Lucius.
Now let's enjoy this chapter.
Chapter 2: "The Extra Order"
Several trucks came to a screeching stop. Before the vehicles came to a full pause, dozens of men in green cameo came flooding out, all armed to the teeth. The AKS-74U rifles was seen as their primary weapon, the looks on their faces showing that they were fully prepared to use them.
Coming out as last was the Captain of this Extra Order outfit of mercenaries, blond with a ponytail and some dark tinted shades, the Caucasian man of South African nationality with a scar around his left eye, looked with enthusiasm at the packed bar where he could hear them being busy and not knowing what was to come to them.
Followed by two of his men, he pulled out his fragile grenades.
"Show time, people!" the captain grinned as his thumbs pulled out the pins.
It happened so quickly.
One minute, Rokuro and Revy were having a fun drinking contest, and the next, his world exploded into clouds of shrapnel. His ears rang, he tasted blood, and for a moment, he thought that he was dead – that some part of his body was blown off, and that he was going to bleed to death–
Then he heard gunshots, and he realized that he was safe. In the chaos, Revy had grabbed him and flung him over the bar counter before following suit. Pings and whizzes of deadly bullets rang throughout the air, the cries of those unfortunate enough to get in their way filling the air.
Loud thumps and gunfire filled the air, a haunting melody of death and destruction that knocked and broke in through their door. Rokuro thought that it was never going to end. He could've sworn that someone was yelling something in the distance, but Rokuro couldn't hear anything past the harsh ringing that pierced his eardrums.
Gathering himself into a fetal position, his teeth chattered like he was in a bloody winter, sobering up very quickly despite the sheer amount of alcohol he had just consumed. He nervously looked to his right, and saw, to his disbelief, Revy, who was calmly sipping the rest of the drink she had also saved, alongside Bao, who was armed with a shotgun and looked to be in the middle of having an aneurysm.
"Damn it, Revy!" Bao said carrying a shotgun he pulled out, a Remington pump shotgun he just loaded with enough anger in his voice to berate the lady. "What kind of crowd did you and your damn boytoy bring to my goddamn establishment!?"
Revy just lazily shrugged. "I don't know, ask Naruto." She then processed what he had just said completely, and shot him a fierce glare. "And he's not my fucking boy toy you old bastard!"
"Whatever you wanna call it, do something!" Bao yelled back.
The shooting continued for another few minutes, causing Rock to just cower in cover, but Revy glanced at her own weapons, calmly checking them for ammo, seeing they were loaded and in good condition.
"This is insane!" Rokuro finally yelped.
"Oh grow a pair, will ya?" Revy snapped to the panicking Rock. "Whiskers actually got shot here once, and he took it like a man!"
"Take it easy on him, Revy-chan!" Naruto's head popped out from around the corner of the restroom. "He'll get used to it!"
"You're being too easy on him, damn it!" Revy shouted back over the gunfire. "And stop calling me that!"
"Can the both of you focus?!" Dutch shouted as he unholstered his revolver. "These mercs are here for us!"
"Great!" Revy smirked while raising her pistols. "Maybe they'll be a challenge!"
The gunfire stopped without warning. The gang was about to return fire when they heard something clunking on the floor. Naruto's eyes widened before he suddenly charged out of hiding to kick something off the floor.
*BOOM!*
"Gotta do better than that, you Apartheid bastards!" Naruto laughed.
"I've had enough! I can't take it anymore!" Rock was panicking while having his fingers in his ears. "I graduated from a respectable college! I landed a job at a company! Why this? This isn't right!"
More bullets began flying through the air, striking everything but surprisingly doing nothing to the bar itself save for scratching it up a bit.
"Wow, you bulletproofed the bar?" Revy whistled.
"Yep, it can take up to 50 caliber!" Bao smiled. "Beat the kid to it!"
"Wait, that's my shipment!" Naruto's eyes widened before he turned angrily at the bar owner. "You stole my ordered bulletproof bar?!"
Giving him a toothy grin, the old Vietnamese man chuckled. "Gotta act fast when you can, kid!"
"You sonuvva-"
A bullet flew past Naruto, nearly grazing his cheek.
"Hey!"
Naruto emptied his entire magazine in rapid fire, dropping four gunmen in a flash through the shot-out windows before they could even enter the building.
Huffing, he put another magazine inside his pistol and yelled: "Revy! Show them why they call you Two Hands!"
A sadistic grin grew on the woman's face.
"My pleasure~"
With Dutch joining in, the armed Black Lagoon members all started opening fire on the mercs with Revy going loose as she jumped over the bar and went on like a wild animal going for her prey.
*BANG!* *BANG!* *BANG!* *BANG!*
Not expecting one to jump out of the open, the men hesitated for a moment as Revy landed in the middle of the squad, and that second was all it took for her to unleash death upon them. Firing a single bullet through their skulls in rapid fashion, they fell like sock puppets, their heavy gear dragging them down to Hell.
But Revy's "Two Hands" wasn't done.
Jumping into the air and making an insane flip, she fired four more bullets with that same, mad grin on her face, enjoying the sight of the 9mm puncturing through the skulls of the other two hired guns.
"Little bitch–"
*BANG!*
A hitman who was about to raise his gun at Revy jerked backward, a new hole leaking blood forming in the middle of his forehead. Naruto growled as he managed to claim his third kill for the night before he began wiping out the others.
"Bao, who sold it to you!?" Naruto demanded while Dutch fired his revolver next to him as he covered Benny to run to the back. "It better not be–"
"I bought it fair and square, kid! You were just too slow!" Bao yelled back while firing his shotgun once at the mercs before cocking it for a new shell in the chamber, "Besides, there's more! Ask Chang!"
"Ugh! Not him!" Naruto complained while shooting, taking cover for a brief moment. "He's an asshole!"
"Got 'em for ya, guys!" Revy shouted as she jumped back and landed next to Bao and Rock at the bar, reloading her twin pistols. "Reloading!"
"Welcome back, Revy!" Not done yelling, Bao's irritation turned towards the woman. "You pain in the ass! How many times have you destroyed my bar?!"
Just then one merc jumped over the bar, aiming his gun at the three–
*PLUNGE!*
The man's eyes widened as he felt his throat suddenly getting penetrated. Gurgling, he dropped his gun as he clawed at the knife in his throat.
*BANG!*
Bao finished him off with a buckshot in the face, his eyes twitching. "You're not bleeding on my countertop!"
Naruto opened fire with his new weapon and opened fire at the nearest three mercs, mowing them down while Revy smirked at his previous handiwork.
"Been a while since I've seen you use your throwing knives," Revy said while still firing at the enemy. "And here I thought you were getting rusty going old school, grandpa."
"Oh, you ain't seen nothing yet," Naruto grinned. "Watch this."
He pulled out another kunai, but this one had a piece of paper attached. Said paper had the word "ブーム！" written on it. Placing the paper down onto the floor, Naruto pulled off his leather glove and stuck out his right thumb – which was painted black(?) and then struck it against the floor near the paper like it was a match. To Rokuro's surprise, it made a small flash of light, with sparks flying out and landing on the paper. Immediately, the paper caught on fire, and Naruto quickly seized the kunai.
"Eat this!" Naruto shouted as he flung the kunai through the air, striking another mercenary in the chest. Due to his armor, it didn't penetrate flesh, but it did startle him enough to pause in his tracks to look down at the flaming kunai.
"What the-"
*BOOM!*
Suddenly, the entire paper tag caught on fire before it detonated, sending deadly shrapnel and its flaming parts scattered throughout the air – and near the many spilled drinks that pooled around them.
All of a sudden, the dark room lit up into a sea of flames, causing the rest of the mercenaries to order a hasty retreat.
Rock was left without words, "Wow…"
"What the…" Rokuro was left without words.
Revy just smiled at what she saw.
"Talk about overkill." Dutch said having witnessed this, "Alright, let's go."
"Right!" Revy said as she kept her aim, "I'll cover you guys."
"Come on, Rock," Naruto said, grabbing the salaryman by the shirt and dragging him away with Dutch following up behind, Revy was the last to go with, leaving Bao to stand there and stare at his establishment going up in flames. Growling in rage, he yelled out:
"DAMN YOU, UZUMAKI!"
( - Naruto Uzumaki's Explosive Seal - )
Invented by his true, Naruto Uzumaki found a way to weaponize gunpowder in a very special way. Creating a liquid variant using a special gel, he could coat practically any surface with it for later use. Said later use is delayed detonations, such as when turning an ordinary piece of paper into a ticking timebomb with a little bit of fire.
( - Naruto Uzumaki's Black Thumb - )
Losing a part of his right thumb during a shootout at the Yellow Flag Bar, he decided to turn lemons into lemonade by crafting a useful tool onto his damaged finger. Creating a custom-made thumb prosthetic is capable of slipping in an artificial thumbnail made of flint – a popular material used to create sparks when in need of starting a fire.
Of course, since it sticks out like a sore thumb, he covers his Black Thumb using a leather glove.
Kicking the back door open, Dutch spotted two mercs guarding the rear and quickly dropped them with two precise shots just as he heard a car coming in.
"Good timing!"
Swerving right in front of them was a Road Runner – a 1969 Plymouth classic with Benny in the driver's seat; the passengers' doors were already open.
"Get in!"
Naruto followed up first, throwing Rock inside the backseat before Revy jumped in afterward. Dutch covered them with by continuing to fire shots at the mercs as Naruto slipped into the car, before he took the shotgun seat.
"Over there!" three more mercenaries came around the corner. "Get them!"
Before they could shoot, Naruto's head popped out of the window. Holding yet another kunai with a lit explosive tag on it, he flung it at them with a grin.
"Goodbye!"
The Road Runner sped off just as the explosive kunai erupted, sending the three hired guns flying like ragdolls.
With the Black Lagoon company now putting some distance away from their hitmen, they were finally allowed to relax. Revy carelessly placed her feet over Dutch's seat, Naruto was quickly trying to fasten her seatbelt, and Rokuro was frantically watching the rear, fearing that the mercenaries were already behind their tail.
"I thought you said you weren't going to use those papers anymore."
"Hm?" Naruto responded, looking up at her as he just finished fastening her seatbelt. "Did you say something?"
"Don't play dumb with me, Naruto," Revy glared at him. "You burnt down Bao's bar with that shit. He ain't gonna be happy with you, you know?"
"You also wound up flambeing the dead customers still in there," Dutch added. "That stench is gonna stay there for a while."
"It is what it is," Naruto shrugged. "Besides, dumbass should've installed a sprinkler system. And better yet, why do you care, Revy-chan?"
"I don't. You told me that you stopped making those fucking things, but it turns out you had some in your pocket. You better make me some for lying to me, you hear?" Revy huffed.
"What the hell is this, a movie?" Rokuro said, who was seen mumbling to himself while looking out the window. "Am I in a movie?"
"Nah, this is reality, dude," Naruto chuckled, clapping Rokuro on the back. "But speaking of movies, I got plenty of them on the shelves if you like."
"You could also star in one of his movies," Revy cackled.
"I don't swing that way, Revy-chan," Naruto deadpanned.
"Stop calling me that!"
The Roadrunner sped through Roanapur, with them going straight for the docks.
The Yellow Flag Bar was still burning but hadn't fallen yet. Its flames dying out, the Extra Order mercenaries were quick to clean up their mess, dragging away the fallen. They were quick to lick their wounds, ready to avenge their fallen and pursue their prey.
Despite this massive setback, the E.O. captain watched on with a smile, his sunglasses reflecting the orange light of the damaged bar.
Just then, one of his men approached him with a salute.
"Sir, 26 dead and 4 wounded and counting. We lost some in the explosion," the underling reported. "I'm sorry, sir, we thought they were ordinary punks. We didn't know that they were well armed and trained as well."
"You can say that again."
"Sir?"
The captain pulled out what looked to be burnt paper and shards of metal.
"Recognize these? These are what's known as Explosive Tags. Or, to be specific, paper bombs. There's only very few in existence, and that's because there's only one creator."
"I…I beg your pardon?"
"Paper bombs, son, try to keep up. Thin, light, and very versatile. Goes unnoticed by most detectors, with just one spark, it turns into an explosive comparable to a grenade. I don't know how he made this, but…"
The captain dropped the remains onto the ground. The underling looked to see their boss sprouting a crooked grin.
"I can't wait to fight these guys head-on, especially that blond brat that made them."
{ Black Lagoon - (A few hours later) }
Once upon a time, back when it was just Dutch, the Black Lagoon company used to also partake in human trafficking. Then the Yellow Death came by, and they stopped immediately before he could turn their attention to them. Well, he came along anyway before he got the news, which was how Revy eventually joined the crew.
Once upon a time, the Black Lagoon used to have a cargo hold specifically meant to carry human cargo. But now, that cargo hold was repurposed to become a hybrid of a recreational center and a small workplace. Said workplace was currently being used by the Yellow Death, who was humming as he was carefully crafting his explosive tags.
The makeshift table in front of him was a chaotic, yet organized jumble of materials: thin pieces of paper, a bowl full of ink, small vials of black powder-mixed goo, and coils of thin, sturdy string.
Naruto licked his lips as he put his calligraphy brush down.
"Done!"
Naruto placed the last of the explosive tags underneath a small fan, where it began drying his work. Satisfied with the amount he had made, he began cleaning up the table before he walked out of the room to join the others on the deck with Dutch.
"Goddamn it, Benny!"
He ignored Benny and Revy getting into a shouting match behind Benny's computer, with the woman looking close to shooting the monitor. Shaking his head, Naruto decided to just go up the ladder and join the rest of the group on the rooftop, where he saw Rock rambling to himself next to an impassive Dutch.
"Problems here?" Naruto asked, snatching a can of beer from Dutch's side.
"Looks like our guest here doesn't like Roanapur's hospitality that much," Dutch snorted. "We've just passed the Thai Navy's security zone, and are making our way to reach Palawan Port by daybreak. Worst case scenario if negotiations fail, we'll drop Rock here off somewhere in Malaya."
"You sure?" Naruto asked while leaning against the wall. "It'll be a pain, but I can take him to the Japanese Embassy if–"
"Not going to happen. Besides, that'll take too much time," Dutch grunted, shutting down the idea. "He'll have to figure out something on his own."
"Are you serious!?" Rokuro shouted while standing up, hearing this and responding harshly, "You bring me this far to let me die?! At least drop me off-"
*Click!*
"I've had enough of your shit."
Rokuro's words died in his throat as he felt the familiar sensation of cold metal pressing against his temple. Revy appeared out of nowhere, scowling as her amber-brown eyes seemed to glow with irritation.
"First you're whining and crying, and now you want us to be your fucking taxi service?" Revy said coldly while pushing the gun painfully into his head. "Why don't I do you a fucking favor and show you what color your brain is?"
A leather hand slowly curled over Revy's gun, its owner playing peacemaker once more.
"Ease up, Revy, he got the message," Naruto said, coming in between. "Besides, we both know that Dutch will have you clean up the brains just like last time."
"Ugh, don't remind me," Revy sighed as she pulled her pistol back, rolling her eyes at the memory. "Was worth watching it though. bastard deserved it…but was still brutal."
Naruto's glove hand turned into a fist when thinking back of it, but he responded then.
"He had a lot more coming to him."
"Not arguing with you there – he crossed a line – but let's not forget about you, Naruto," Dutch responded while steering. "You made an even bigger mess with him than Revy here did with Gato."
"Was worth every minute," the Yellow Death smiled slowly, remembering that faithful day when he inherited Rowan "Jackpot" Pigeon's little empire. Upon learning some of the more…twisted things Rowan distributed willingly and happily, he sought to make an example of him. Smashing his head onto the Black Lagoon until some of his brain matter spilled out, he hung his bleeding body off of the boat for the sharks to devour his lower half. What was left was strung up in the middle of Roanapur, with burnt copies of his twisted merchandise lying below his charred corpse, where it stayed for about a week until somebody finally dared to clean it up.
Good times.
"Okay, listen up, Rock. We can't just drop you off the nearest dock like we're a rescue party," Naruto explained to the former businessman. "The moment any half-decent coast guard picks us up on their radar like, say, the Taiwanese, Malaysians, the Filipinos, or, Kami forbids, the Chinese, we're toast."
"Hey Rock, it's your boss, Mr. Kageyuama," Dutch suddenly said, offering an earpiece to him. Rokuro nearly scrambled for the earpiece as he hastily placed it into his ear.
"Hello! It's me, Okajima here, sir! I'm so sorry about the disk–"
["There's no need to worry about that anymore. As far I am concerned that disk no longer exists."]
Rokuro blinked as those words cut through him like an arrow through flesh. He didn't notice as Dutch handed a few more earpieces to the rest of the Black Lagoon company, where they began to listen in on the conversation.
"I-I don't understand…"
["Given your situation, I suppose you deserve to know the truth. Still, do keep this to yourself. It's difficult to tell you but to compensate for a downturn in business, our board has agreed to aid in the development of nuclear weapons for war-torn countries. That disk you were supposed to be looking over contained the plans."]
Rokuro gasped at this. Nuclear weapons? They were supposed to be a technology company, not an arms manufacturer. This…This didn't make sense. How long have they been conducting shady business like this? How has nobody spoken up about it? How–
["It's truly nothing but trouble for management, I mean nukes in this day and age. Really, it makes me question their judgment."]
Naruto rolled his eyes at hearing that, figuring out where this was going.
["Anyways, eventually, I'll be in a position to do something about this, but in the meantime, this can not be made public, Okajima. For the sake of the fifty-thousand employees of Asahi Industries, disappear into the South China Sea. If by some miracle you return to us, you'll be promoted to Assistant Manager. But if you don't, I'll request that the president and all the other board members attend your funeral."]
Rokuro felt his heart sink at his boss's callous remark about his fate as if it was a simple fact of assigning him a job. Rokuro lost all feeling in his legs as he nearly stumbled off the boat.
["Well then, the mercenaries we've hired should be arriving shortly. Thank you for your services to Asahi Industry."]
"W-Wait–!"
The phone call ended, leaving a heartbroken Rokuro on a boat surrounded by criminals who, for a moment, held some sympathy for the man left to die.
…
"BLERGH!"
"There there, let it out, man," Naruto patted Rokuro on the back as he expelled the contents of his stomach overboard. Between all the Bacardi in his belly and the fact that his life was carelessly thrown away by the company he served faithfully for years, it was too much for the man as his body couldn't take the stress.
"Wow, they cut you off just like that, huh?" Revy asked while watching over him, looking unsure what to say, "Hey, don't think I don't feel sorry for you, all right?"
"That's how cutthroat companies are nowadays, especially in Japan," Naruto sighed. "Either you're an asset or you're a liability. Either way, you're not human anymore. Not in their eyes."
"Like what just happened back there," Revy hummed, annoyed by the fact that they definitely won't be getting that ransom money she was hoping for.
"Please…" Rokuro interrupted tears in his eyes and his throat hoarse. "Just leave me alone!"
"Can't do, my man. You're in a bad spot right now, and I'd hate to go to sleep at night knowing that I could've stopped you from jumping. Besides, now that you're dead to them, your best bet is to join the dark side."
["Hate to break this up you guys, but we've got company!"]
Hearing this, all mirth left the Yellow Death's lips as he quickly scanned their surroundings. Hearing and seeing no ships or boats, his eyes and ears then went to the sky.
"I think I see it," Naruto growled as he rushed back inside to grab a better weapon.
Even from a distance, they could hear the rotating blades of the chopper that was on their tail. Coming out from under, now armed with a machine gun, Naruto took a better look at their pursuers, and let out a frown.
He recognized this aircraft. He'd encountered them before during his days in Central Asia, where they had these in droves patrolling the skies.
"It's a fucking gunship!" Revy shouted.
"Not just any gunship: it's a Hind!"
Hot on their trail, the Soviet helicopter gunship roared into view, it's deadly guns on full display. It began lowering itself as it rapidly grew closer to their location. Armed to the teeth with machine guns to rocket launchers, it was definitely no ordinary patrol chopper.
"It's a fucking Mil-Mi 24!" Naruto shouted. "Step on it, Dutch!"
The PT boat cut through the water like a hot knife to butter. The water turned whiter behind them as they sped up. A futile gesture – they weren't going anywhere.
The mercenaries of Extra Order weren't ones to give up on their prey so easily. If anything, they enjoyed a little challenge from time to time, and this one may be their magnum opus.
Their targets were not only capable of fighting back, with several of their own men down for good or for the count because of them, but they even had a pretty sweet bounty on their heads. Their losses would be nothing after they collect their heads.
The co-pilot, a weathered man named Mayer, leaned over to speak with the Captain, who personally commanded this daring mission.
["We have a visual!"]
The Captain snorted as his eyes remained glued to the target.
["No need to tell me – I can smell them from up here!"]
His existentialism temporarily forgotten, Rokuro watched as the gunship flew dangerously close to them. His boss wasn't kidding – they were really that adamant about killing them! They didn't even care that he was on board. They didn't–
"Get down!"
Rokuro was flung to the floor by Naruto, who was holding that stolen AK-74U and a Gepárd anti-material rifle over his shoulder with a crate of ammo.
"Revy, catch!"
"Thanks!" Revy let out a toothy grin as she caught the rifle and the ammo box. Quickly racking a load into the chamber, she aimed her gun at the sky and opened fire.
The gunship quickly returned fire.
*VHOOSH!* *VHOOSH!*
"INCOMING ROCKETS!"
The missiles crashed into the ocean water, missing their target by inches thanks to Dutch's evasive action. The explosions still rocked the boat, making its passengers stumble. Still, Revy and Naruto kept up the counterattack.
["This isn't good! We're in some serious shit!"]
*POW!* *POW!* *POW!*
Despite the deafening sounds of the anti-material rifle splitting the air, Revy kept up her grin and her fire as she aimed to take down the chopper. A few landed but more missed; the pilot swerved and dodged the bullets much like Dutch was. Revy was about to pull the trigger again when the helicopter suddenly began to back off.
"I'm pretty sure we all know it's not fucking good, Dutch!" Revy shouted back as she tried to hit the gunship again, only to find it going out of range. "Damn it!"
Naruto put down his gun too, seeing as how none of the rounds would ever make it to the target anyhow. He glanced back and raised an eyebrow to see that Rokuro was hastily putting on a life jacket.
"I've had it! I'm getting the hell out of here!"
"Hey, Rock!"
"What–?"
*CRACK!*
With a quick smack to the side of his head with the butt of his rifle, Rokuro Okajima fell onto the floor and didn't get up.
"You'll thank me later," Naruto grunted as he dragged the unconscious man downstairs.
"Hey, Naruto!" Revy shouted as she reloaded her rifle. She turned her head to see that he was coming back up from down below. "Where's the other shithead?!"
"He's taking a nap," Naruto chuckled. "You doing alright without me?"
["Heads up! It's coming back!"] Benny's warning blared through their ears. The two looked up to see that the helicopter was diving back towards them, this time its Gatling guns roaring to life.
"Get down!"
*POWPOWPOWPOWPOW* *PLINK* *PLINK!* *PLINK!* *PLINK!*
The next thing Revy knew, Naruto's large, strong body lay on top of hers, his hand serving as a little pillow that shielded the back of her head from painfully kissing the metal floor. A powerful gush of wind smacked their bodies, and Revy realized that the gunship had flown past them.
"Thanks, but can you get off me?"
"Yeah, sure– *GRK!*"
As Naruto tried to climb off of her, he fell right back down, his face planted right onto her boobs. Revy was about to tell him off (now wasn't the time, dammit!), when she felt something warm and wet lick her left arm.
"...Where?"
Naruto gave her a pained smile as he replied, "Grazed my shoulder, no big deal."
Revy strained her neck and frowned at the gash that ran across his right shoulder. Debating on whether to scold him for being her knight or to thank him again, she elected to help him get up.
"Come on, let's get you fixed up."
Grim silence filled the air, save for the continuous sound of the boat ripping through the ocean water.
"What's the state of my boat?" Dutch asked.
"FUCK!" Naruto roared as Revy did her best to gently bandage him up. "It's banged up, but nothing we can't fix. Also, needless to say, the torpedoes weren't hit. I'm also fine, thanks for asking."
"Ughh…my head…" Rokuro slowly got up from where he was unceremoniously dumped. "What…What happened?"
"We're still in a heap of shit, that's what's happening," Dutch responded. "Any idea why they stopped shooting at us?"
"The mangrove."
"Huh?"
Naruto stood up and got next to Dutch, pointing at the front. "Look, the channel!"
"Damn. We'll get stuck in a narrow path. Throw in the mangroves and rocks, and we won't be able to do much if they try to finish the job," Dutch muttered. "Any suggestions?"
"Yeah. How about we get the fuck out of here?!" Revy snarked. Dutch tried to do just that, turning the wheel and stepping on it when–
*POW!POW!POW!POW!POW!*
Even from within the safety of the boat's metal shell, they could hear the rapid fire of the gunship's machine guns, and it was a miracle that nobody got struck.
Then, just as quickly as the gunship fired upon them, they stopped.
"...Shit," Naruto frowned. "I think they're playing with their food. That's why they're not letting us leave, but not finishing the job. How unprofessional."
"Great," Revy sighed, rubbing her hand against her forehead.
"No other choice, then," Dutch frowned before reluctantly entering the channel.
It was beautiful, honestly. A heavenly spot of nature, the area looked like a picture of natural beauty one might see on a postcard. However, they didn't have time to enjoy the view, especially after they sped past the remains of a sunken, overturned ship.
"Check that out. A sunken ship," Revy commented. "What a bad omen."
Naruto glanced at it. Humming, the gears in his head began to turn, figuring out ways they could use what they had as an advantage…
As their boat made its way through the winding river, Naruto (and, strangely, Rock too) began to stare at the gunship. Its presence loomed over them like a predator, it suddenly stopped moving as it began hovering over the stranded ship – something Benny noticed.
["Dutch, they just stopped at that sunken ship and they're hovering there. They're not chasing us anymore."]
"No need to. The bastards got our only exit blocked," Naruto said, glaring at the chopper. "No other way out."
"So…what now?" Rokuro asked nervously.
"Let's play their little game and reach the end of this damn place," Naruto said. "Gives us time and room to think."
"On it," Dutch acknowledged.
The small boat glided deeper into the channel, its motor purring quietly as it followed the winding path of mangroves. The looming shape of a Mil-Mi 24 gunship hovered above the broken ship, its sharp edges casting shadows over the water. Co-pilot Mayer and the Captain were surely waiting for their return, with the captain monitoring their progress from afar in excitement.
But for now, the only sounds were the gentle lapping of the water against the hull and the distant calls of birds hidden within the twisted branches of the mangroves. The air was thick with humidity, and a faint smell of salt lingered on their skin. As they rounded a bend in the channel, they could see rays of golden light piercing through the dense canopy above, creating a shimmering pathway towards their destination.
After a lengthy, but calm sail through the mangrove, the Black Lagoon reached the end of the channel, which turned out to be the bottom of a large waterfall.
The sight would've been a calming one, if not for the fact that it also meant there was no where else to go.
"It's a dead end…" Rokuro muttered, stating the obvious.
"Sure is," Dutch could only nod.
"Damn it!"
*TCHK!*
Naruto lit a cigarette, his mind still racing to think of something. "I guess we'll have to bite the bullet and face these bastards head-on, which is probably what they want anyway. They want us to face them in a show-down for their shits and giggles."
"That's right," Dutch said, joining in on smoking a cigarette. "Wannabe vets that pretend to be like cowboys…I can assume you'd love to put them in their place, Naruto?"
Naruto grew a smirk on his face and let out a chuckle.
"Believe it, I'd love to put another commie chopper down."
"Wait a second!" Rokuro interrupted, getting into Dutch's space. "You're saying our only option is to die!?"
"Hey now, cool it, Rock…" Dutch warned him.
"Let's call the local police! I mean, that's gotta be better than–"
*BAM!*
Rokuro tasted blood as stars winked in his vision. He realized that Dutch had given him a nasty uppercut, sending him stumbling back to the cool, metal wall. Revy let out a yawn as Naruto took another drag from his cigarette.
"You're not helping," Dutch scolded him. "Now like I said, just calm down. Panicking isn't going to solve anything. Now if you wanna survive, I suggest using your head."
"Dutch, how about we wait for them to run out of fuel?" Revy suggested.
"Could, but no guarantee that'd give us a window of opportunity," Naruto replied, mulling over the idea. "They'll call in another gunship as soon as the one chasing us runs low on fuel."
"Besides, these bastards are from E.O." Dutch added. "I doubt that's the only chopper they got ready going after us."
"Fucking wonderful," Revy groaned, running a hand through her hair in frustration. "How's the damage to the boat?"
"From what you and Naruto told me. Nothing serious for now," Dutch answered with a glance out the window. "But I'm more concerned about our load of torpedoes. If even one round hits the load, we all be going to the moon."
"Well that's what you get for keeping them loaded, damn it!"
Dutch turned to Naruto, his thoughts mimicking his own as they both collectively looked at and thought about the large missiles in their arsenal.
"What are you thinking, Naruto?" he asked, curious to know what plan the young ninja had brewing.
Naruto hesitated for a moment before responding, his eyes still fixed on the dangerous weapons.
"Well..." he began, but before he could continue, Rock suddenly interrupted from where he had fallen to the ground. Despite the bruise forming on his chin and the pain evident on his face, there was a newfound determination in his expression as he spoke up.
"I have an idea!"
'This is new,' Naruto raised an eyebrow. 'That look in his eyes…maybe he might be a worthy addition to our crew.'
"Do tell…" he urged Rock, wanting to hear his plan.
…
( 5 minutes later )
"Impossible," Dutch muttered. "There's no way we can pull that off."
The plan Rock just proposed was too wild to imagine – straight out of an action movie, even! But it got some of the Black Lagoon crew thinking, imagining and simulating in their heads how this would go.
"Actually, yeah…" Adjusting his glasses, Benny cleared his throat. "No, we could pull it off. It's just a question of the timing after we drop the anchor."
"Well Dutch, it's not like we got any better options," Revy said, agreeing. "I say we do it."
Dutch flicked his lighter open, allowing Rock to light his cigarette.
"You do realize the plan's not going to work unless they're right in front of us," Dutch pointed out. "Do you really think it's going to happen, Rock?"
Blowing out smoke from his mouth, Rock continued. "It seems like they are having a lot of fun chasing us around, even though it's obvious they have the advantage. What reason would they have to start the fight all over again?"
"Rock's got a point," Naruto agreed with the salaryman. "Like he said, those are the type of guys who think of themselves as modern-day cowboys. Might as well use their ego against them."
"If we lure them into a game of chicken, they won't resist. I don't have any guarantees, though, so it's your call."
The final decision now rested in the hands of the black captain, his cigarette butt carelessly discarded into his half-empty beer can. Tapping his finger thoughtfully against the side, he weighed his options carefully. After a minute, Dutch made up his mind, no longer willing to dwell on the matter at hand. The tension in the room was palpable as they waited for the captain's verdict.
"We sure managed to pick up one crazy son of a bitch. Is bold and deadly something that runs in Japanese blood?"
"I'll take that as a compliment, Dutch," Naruto smirked. "Whaddya say?"
"For this plan? You've got to be completely insane...but the idea is exciting, and what's the point of life if you can't get excited?"
A rare, eerie grin stretched across the stoic man's face.
"Let's do this thing!"
Back at the shipwreck, the Mil-Mi 24 gunship still was up and high in the sky, waiting for their target to return to try to get through the channel through the only exit out of the mangrove.
While the captain was smiling like a wicked man who was eagerly awaiting the inevitable bloodbath, the co-pilot Mayer was cautious and kept his eyes on all the radars. They had the advantage in position, firepower, and initiative. It was best not to get cocky – he just wished his leader would have the same thought.
*BEEPBEEP!*
"The radar picked up something, captain! Our target is on the move!"
Barrelling down the river at high speed, the Black Lagoon's engines roared like a dragon as it sped towards the gunship. On top of the boat, holding onto dear life, was Rock, who held a flare gun in his hand. Next to him, with his legs crossed on a railing, Naruto was manning the Gepárd anti-material rifle with Revy just behind the both of them.
"You sure you want to do this, Naruto? You got shot!" Revy shouted while holding onto the railing. "Let me do it!"
"Oh you wish, Revy-chan! But let me do this!" Naruto said, aiming his sights on the gunship with a big smile. "I'm out hunting big game!"
["Rock, you know what you gotta do, right?"]
"If I fire the missile, I shoot the signal flare away from the boat."
["You got it! I see the jackass!"]
The gunship and the PT boat spotted one another, with both sides itching for blood.
"Naruto!" Revy shouted, "Let's play that game of Chicken!"
Grinning, Naruto held the trigger on his finger and waited for the right moment.
"Naruto! Did you hear–"
*POW!*
…
*CRASH!*
The glass in the cockpit shattered with an wet sound of something splashing to the back of the seat being heard, before the body of the co-pilot Mayer lumped sideways, blood splattering the controls.
The gunship was unbalanced for the moment, forcing the captain to stabilize the gunship. His co-pilot was down, and he was pretty sure that he wasn't breathing anymore.
But he didn't care.
"Oh hell yeah! This is what I'm talking about!" the captain grinned and laughed. "Bring it on!"
…
In retaliation, two missiles were fired from the gunship, going straight for the Black Lagoon – just as expected.
"Rock! They're coming!" Revy shouted. "Shoot that flare!"
*POP!*
The flare arced through the sky, leaving a trail of sparks behind it. A bright, burning ball of light, it let out a high-pitched whistle as it soared through the air, before exploding. The heat from the burning magnesium caught the attention of the fired missiles, their infrared sensors locking onto the target and guiding them toward it with deadly accuracy.
*BOOM!*
The explosion lit up the sky, stunning both parties for a moment.
"It worked!" Naruto shouted. "Now back into the boat!"
As all three scrambled back inside, the Black Lagoon was only an eye's distance away from the shipwreck, with the gunship only being right over it at a low altitude.
"We're in the Alpine run!" Benny shouted from below. "300 feet to go!"
"Buckle up!" Naruto got himself seated, with the belt on, "This gonna get bumpy!"
"150!"
…
The crazed look on the merc captain's eyes only widened as he eyed the boat. His thumb over the control stick, he was going to savor the sight of the boat as it futily tried to use the overturned ship as a shield. It didn't matter – his missiles were going to blow both puny vessels up!
"You're gunna get fucked!" the mercenary captain laughed.
…
"100!"
The boat now reached the shipwreck. No turning back now…
*KCANNNG!*
The boat scraped against the ramp of the rust-covered ship, piercing everyone's ears, but it was quickly over as the Black Lagoon was now soaring in the air, just a few meters away from the gunship…
"FIRE NUMBER ONE! FIRE NUMBER TWO!"
Pulling two handles, Dutch released the two torpedoes. Being suited for underwater, they fell only a second after they were launched.
The one on the right fell into the water almost comically. But the one on the left–
*CRASH!*
Everything that wasn't nailed down in the Black Lagoon flew around in the air, forcing everyone to duck and cover their heads and necks with their arms, save for one Rock, who gave a shit-eating grin at the falling helicopter as he gave it the finger.
"Yeah! You got FUCKED!"
*KABOOM!*
As the Black Lagoon landed safely back into the water, the helicopter crash landed into a nearby shore, erupting into a fireball of flames and molten metal. If the captain was somehow still alive before, he certainly wasn't now.
And just like that, the chase was over, ending with a bang.
THAT IS IT!
Lucius and I got the 2nd chapter done, hope you all liked it and will leave comments and start following the story. Got any questions you can also ask that in the review section.
Going to sleep now its...yep, 2:07 in Belgium, the schedule is fucked. Lol.
Night.