So I'm just gonna say it, I REALLY suck at keeping up with my updates. I do try to keep my muse up for writing but I can't always get it to keep up. And this past year, whenever my muse did return there was always something rearing it's ugly head that distracted it. I am sorry for the wait on this chapter everyone, this whole year has been a mess and it's not getting any better yet. Still I got chapters coming up that I REALLY want to do so my muse should remain for a bit longer.
So please enjoy what I consider to be the weirdest episode of the first season. Yes, really.
It was a clear day down on the Bagg farm as Eustace worked on his truck and Muriel worked inside the farmhouse. Since Avery had already finished her daily chores, she decided to spend the rest of the day just sitting on the front porch and just strumming her guitar. She had worried about her uncle being annoyed by the sounds of the guitar possibly disrupting his work, but usually once he got himself focused on his truck then the chances of him being distracted by her guitar playing would be diminished.
So here she sat on this nice day and just spent her time just practicing her guitar. Around mid afternoon though, she looked up to see some dark clouds approaching the farm and approaching fast.
She raised an eyebrow as she observed and said, "That's odd. I don't remember there being a storm in the forecast today. Then again, this is Nowhere we're talking about."
She decided to look away and ignore the approaching storm clouds, instead deciding to focus on her guitar playing again and even listening to the distant sound of rumbling thunder as the storm approached. That is until she heard an extremely loud crash of thunder, like lightning had just struck dangerously close to the farm.
She jumped in her seat, dropping her guitar and said, "Holy crap! What the heck was that?"
She looked over to her uncle who was still working on his truck. He hadn't even looked up from repairing the engine. She looked to the side of the house and saw that the windmill was now a blackened smoldering ruin.
Avery sighed and said, "That the weather in Nowhere for ya. It's very unpredictable."
A moment later, both Muriel and Courage stepped out onto the front porch, carrying pots with some dry and possibly dying plants.
"Aunt Muriel, did you just hear that crash of thunder just now?" Avery asked as she sat back down in her chair.
Muriel looked to her and said, "Sounds like the thunder is a little close. We'll be fine as long as we stay inside. Meanwhile, I think the coming rain will do these flowers some good."
Avery shrugged and said, "Probably."
She then picked up her guitar and started strumming it again. She looked back over to Eustace who was still struggling on fixing the horn to his truck, but with little or no success at all. She smirked to herself, knowing that he was going to be busy with it for a while.
Muriel turned to go back inside and said, "You might want to get your uncle. It looks like it'll be raining soon and I don't want him getting caught out in the rain again."
Avery nodded and said, "Will do." Knowing that it would be a futile effort regardless.
Muriel went back inside as Avery stood up and put her hands to her mouth and called out, "Hey Uncle Eustace! Aunt Muriel wants you to come inside! It looks like a storm is coming!"
Eustace however didn't even look up and instead just waved her off, keeping his focus on the truck engine. Avery rolled her eyes and continued focusing on her music with Courage sitting beside her, not even aware that she had just attracted the attention of another individual.
Courage sat by the flower pots and stared at them, but then there suddenly came a bright light that emanated from the clouds above, brighter than any sunshine that Avery had ever seen before. It landed upon the flower pots and before she knew it, the flowers in the pot that Muriel had set down began to blossom and bloom. In no time at all, the pot was full of beautiful flowers all gleaming brightly. However, the flowers inside the pot that Courage had brought out remained dried out and dying. She was mesmerized by the sight, while Courage looked weirded out and wondering why the other pot hadn't bloomed.
She was broken out of her trance when her uncle called out, "Avery! Where are my pliers?!"
Avery groaned at his annoyance, but figuring she'd have to go inside anyway, picked up the pot of blooming flowers and took them back inside.
She set them on a small table by the window and Muriel exclaimed, "See? I knew setting them outside would do them some good."
Avery nodded and said, "Surprised that they recovered so fast. Have you seen Uncle Eustace's pliers anywhere by the way? He says he needs them."
"Probably in the closet. He's always leaving his tools in there," Muriel answered while shaking her head.
Avery nodded and checked out the closet. Sure enough, that was where they were. She took them back outside and gave them to her uncle when she walked to the truck.
"Bout time," he said as he snatched them roughly from her.
Avery glared at him and said, "Yeah, you're welcome."
He either didn't hear her or ignored her as he didn't even give her a response and simply went back to his work. Avery sighed and turned back to the farmhouse. She was just stepping back onto the porch when Courage suddenly let out a gasp.
Avery looked at him and asked, "Something the matter boy?"
Instead of answering, Courage just took his eyes off of his face and wiped them like a pair of glasses, much to Avery's confusion. When Avery looked to where Courage was looking though, there was no one there.
Avery merely patted him on the head and said, "I think that's enough fresh air for one day boy. Let's go inside."
Avery went back inside, leaving Courage outside and sat in one of the chairs in the living room and picked up the TV guide to see if anything was on right now. That was when Courage came walking back into the room, carrying flowers and a heart shaped box of candy.
Avery looked up from the TV guide and said, "Courage, where'd you get those?"
Before he could respond, she heard footsteps approaching from outside and Eustace hollering, "Wrong pliers. Did you take my... ehh?"
Eustace walked in and stopped mid-sentence as he spotted Courage standing there with the flowers and candy in his paws.
"Whatcha got there dog?" Eustace asked and took them from Courage's paws.
Avery was just about to interject, but then Muriel stepped into the room and saw him.
"Why Eustace, for me?" she asked. "What a sweet surprise. Eustace you are a dear man."
She walked over and took the flowers and candy from Eustace, leaving him still confused until Courage pushed them apart and babbled something to them. Seeing as they didn't understand him, Muriel merely patted Courage on the head and left to put the flowers in a vase while Eustace went off to look for his pliers.
Avery shrugged and went back to reading the TV guide, when there came a sudden knock at the door. She looked up and could make out someone standing out there and so she got up and was about to answer when Courage tried to stop her. She merely picked him up and went to answer the door.
To her surprise, there stood a large muscular goose man with white feathers wearing a blue toga. The feathers around his neck were a bluish color as well, making it look like he wore a collar on his neck.
"Yes? Can I help you sir?" she asked.
He stood tall and proud and said, "Mortal woman, I am here to pronounce eternal love for you."
Avery gave him an inquisitive look and said, "Well I'm not sure what to make of that. You did pronounce it properly at least," she added with a little sarcasm at the end.
He put his arms to his sides and said, "You do not understand, I present to you an expression of my love. This gift."
With that he turned back around and raised his arms up. As he did, plants of various types began growing towards the farmhouse. Various bushes and flowers of many different types materialized towards the farmhouse and some grew up onto the porch.
Avery had to admit, that it looked very beautiful and she was actually impressed by the display of it. She checked with the bracelet real quick and it wasn't giving her any vibes that this guy was dangerous. She wanted to give him at least a little bit of the time of day, especially since he had been so nice to her so far, but given their track record of random folks out in Nowhere she didn't know if she wanted to take the risk with him or not.
Courage growled at him from behind her, so she decided that maybe it wouldn't be best right now.
Avery gave him a little warmer look and said, "That's very sweet and, I admit, very impressive. But I'm afraid that I'm not looking for love right now. Maybe another time though."
She looked down at Courage and patted him on the head, him giving her a pleasing look. Neither of them saw the glare that the Goose God quickly shot Courage.
"But thanks though, a field of green might actually do this barren place some good," she said politely and then turned back to go inside.
But as she closed the door, the Goose God turned back around and forced the field of green away. Dying flowers drooped onto the porch and ground around the farmhouse as the Goose let out a depressed sigh.
Back inside, Avery sat back down as Eustace walked back into the room with his pliers.
"Who was that?" he asked roughly.
Avery shrugged and said, "Just an admirer who was pledging his love for me with a ton of flowers and a field. I let him down gently though. I just hope it didn't hurt him too bad."
Muriel sat in her rocker and said, "That sounds lovely dear. I'm sure he'll be fine."
"Oh," Eustace said and his usual scowl dropped. "You seen my screwdriver?"
"Try the closet," Muriel suggested to him.
As they talked amongst themselves, the Goose God snuck back up to the front door and slipped a letter under the door and rang the bell. Avery walked over the door and saw that her name was written fancily on the envelope. She opened it and pulled a sheet of paper out. She instantly realized who it was who slipped it under the door.
"Huh, looks like he wrote a poem for me," she said and then read it aloud.
Would that you ride
On feathered goosey wing
And be my queen
And I your goosey king
Then all days be sunny
All days shall be spring
Ever... Ever...
Goosey spring
The entire time she read the poem, Courage began gagging at the fluffness of it all. Avery couldn't blame him, as flattering a gesture it was the poem wasn't doing it for her.
She shrugged and said, "A little too much for my taste. It's a nice gesture, but it's not for me."
Still she didn't completely disregard it. She set the paper down on the side table and went back into the kitchen. She didn't see Courage grab the paper and run back out of the house to Eustace, who only used the paper as a tissue to blow his nose.
Shortly after, Courage was back in the kitchen helping Avery wash the dishes. As they washed, they both heard the sound of a stringed instrument strumming just outside of the kitchen window and they both looked out to see the Goose God again.
"When a goose god loves a woman," he sang. "A woman small and petite. When the goose god loves that woman he gives her this treat."
He ended the song by leaning his head back and made a honking sound with his mouth.
Avery raised an eyebrow at him and said, "Not sure how that's a treat. Must be a goose thing. Still I have to admit that it's nice that he wrote a song for me. And he seems to have a liking for stringed instruments."
Courage tugged on her jeans and whined at her to get her attention. Instead of turning to him, she kept staring out at the Goose God in wonder. Courage reached up and began tapping at the bracelet, hoping to get it's attention. It did nothing.
He ran into the living room and tried to get Muriel's attention, but she shushed him as her favorite show was on. So he ran back out to try to get Eustace's attention. All that this got him was a mask scare.
As he tried to find some way to help, the Goose God came along and blew a cold wind at Courage, forming icicles on the little dog and freezing him in place. With Courage temporarily subdued, the Goose God went back to the front door and knocked on it again.
Avery answered it, but found no one there. That is until she looked up to the sky and saw the Goose God on a storm cloud above her.
"Goose God and Avery! Goose God and Avery! Goose God and Avery forever!" he sang and then bowed with a thank you before he disappeared into the sky again.
Avery smiled with a sigh and said, "Well that was grand."
Courage however growled and pulled her back inside. He looked back at Avery who seemed to have been a little awestruck at the gesture but he couldn't figure out why. Normally she'd be indifferent to this kind of behavior, but yet it seemed that she was falling for it. Moreover, the bracelet itself wasn't even warning her of the potential danger.
It appeared to Courage that maybe there was nothing wrong with this guy. Or maybe something had to be off.
With Avery sitting awestruck, Courage slunk out of the house and creeped around the farm in search of the Goose God. He always seemed to be just one step ahead and always struck quickly, so he figured that the Goose God likely had to be close by. He just wasn't sure if the Goose was around the farm or up in the sky. The very thought was a frustrating one for Courage.
He was just about to pull on his ears in frustration, when he saw something lying on the ground by the front door. He got down on all fours and took a closer look and to his amazement realized that he was looking at a couple of the Goose God's feathers. Figuring that this was his chance to look for the crazy goose, he sniffed at the feathers and tried to find the scent.
He sniffed the air around him and to his surprise, he caught the scent and began following it around the farm. He sniffed around the house, by the chicken coop, past Eustace still working on his truck and it ended up leading him to up the barn.
He approached the barn and could hear the sound of someone chuckling passionately from inside. He peaked in through a crack in the door and he was not surprised to see that the Goose God was inside, chuckling to himself as he prepared a cart full of food.
"This shall seal the deal, no mortal woman can resist the cooking of a god. Oh lucky for me she had that trinket on her," he said to himself.
Courage went wide eyed as he listened to the Goose Gods rambling.
"Classic manipulation of old familiar magic. Reverse it on it's owner and you can make them fall for anyone. Soon my queen we shall leave this place. I only to concentrate on the magic for just a little bit longer," he said as he prepared the final touches on the cart.
Courage gasped and dashed from the barn and back over to the farmhouse. He banged on the door and Avery answered it almost instantly. Courage began babbling to her, but before he could show her anything, he was knocked out of the way by the Goose God and his cart of food.
The Goose God bowed to her and said, "Care for a bite to eat?"
Avery could feel her mouth watering at the sight of the food and said, "Yes, I'm starving."
Courage landed in the trashcan and growled once again before pulling himself out. He looked over to the duo and practically gagged as the Goose God laid across Avery's lap as she pulled grapes off of the bunch and dropped them into his mouth. He even offered some to her to which she accepted. After several minutes of this, the Goose God sat up and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.
"Come with me petite young Avery. Shed your mortal coil and come with me on Goosey wind and up to Valhalla. Where you shall be my petite young queen," the Goose God said excitedly.
Avery smiled to which Courage gasped.
"It sounds marvelous," she said to him.
The Goose God smiled and said, "It is. There you shall live forevermore as we rule over the weather, together. What say you?"
Avery smiled and said, "Yes, I shall be your queen."
Courage screamed at her answer, but neither her or the Goose God took notice of him.
The Goose God smiled and said, "And so it shall be."
With the snap of his fingers, a cloud formed around Avery and she vanished from view for a moment. When the cloud disappeared, the Goose God marveled at the sight of her.
Avery stood before him and was now wearing a long light purple silken gown that reached the ground below her. Instead of sleeves, several golden bands adorned her arms that held up a see through purple fabric under arms that sparkled like glitter adorned it. Gold earrings hung from her ears and a golden tiara adorned her head. The bracelet was still visible on her wrist.
Courage gasped at the sight and knew he was running out of time to save her from this creep.
"Then let us be off my dear. Say goodbye to this mortal realm and say hello to eternity," he said to her.
With that, he materialized a cloud chariot and Courage, seeing no other options, ran to the Goose God with a scream and launched himself onto the Goose God's head and began babbling as his attack broke the Gods concentration.
As the Goose God tried pulling Courage off of his head, Avery began to blink and covered her eyes for a second as she tried rubbing them clear. She looked up in time to see the Goose God pull Courage off of his head and toss him aside.
She looked back at him, down at herself and said, "What are you doing to Courage? And what am I wearing?"
The Goose God looked back at her and said, "Nevermind that. Come with me my queen and we shall be off."
Avery shuddered and said, "Eww! Look, you're a flattering guy and I like that you're dedicated. But I already told you, I'm not looking for love right now. I'm sure that there's someone else out there that you'd like more."
Instead of accepting her rejection, the Goose God stood tall and said, "There are no others like you. If you will not come with me willingly, then I shall make you."
And with that, he grabbed her and effortlessly threw her over his shoulder.
"HEY!" she hollered. "Put me down!"
Courage howled and ran over to the truck where Eustace was still working. Courage tried his best to get his attention, but Eustace continued to ignore him.
Avery began beating her fists against the Goose's back and said, "Let go of me you creep, I don't want to go with you!"
The Goose God ignored her pleas and the pounding of her fists as he climbed onto the chariot and prepared to take off.
Courage desperate to get Eustace's attention, climbed into the truck cab and pressed his paw down on the horn, startling Eustace and making him bang his head on the hood of the truck as it blared, knocking him out.
Just as he was about to go off, the Goose God turned his head and looked back to the truck. Courage hit the horn a few more times and Avery stopped beating her fists against the goose's back and looked over to the truck as Courage continued to honk the horn, a horn that sounded very similar to the honks from the goose.
"That... that sound. What is that glorious sound?" said the Goose God.
"That would be my uncle's truck," Avery said before muttering "weirdo" under her breath.
Courage hit the horn a few more times before the Goose God released Avery and dropped her to the ground, getting dust onto the gown she was wearing.
She sat up, rubbing her arm, brushing the dust off of her and said, "Thanks for the soft landing you jerk."
The Goose God didn't hear her as he flew towards the truck saying, "Oh I have found her. I have found my true love. I have found my queen."
Avery shuddered at the mere thought of the Goose and the truck being a couple, feeling unsettled by the very thought of it.
He flew over to the truck and landed on top of it as he hovered over it.
"Oh speak to me again my queen. Make your sounds of love and longing," the Goose asked of it.
Just wanting to be free of this guy already, Courage hit the horn twice and the Goose repeated the sound. Courage did this two more times with the Goose repeating it both times. Courage ended it with a single long blast to which the Goose returned with a window rattling single blast from his mouth.
The Goose stood on top of the truck as a cloud formed around it and said, "Come my queen, ascend with me. The heavens await our harmony... of honk."
He finished his little speech with a single loud honk as Courage jumped from the truck. Just as the truck was ascending up to the clouds, Eustace stirred and looked up.
"MY TRUCK! Come back truck!" Eustace called out as he watched them disappearing from view and then began sobbing as it vanished from sight.
Deciding that now would be an opportune time to leave him be, Courage and Avery slipped away and let Eustace wallow in his sorrow. They slipped back inside and to Avery's relief, her aunt was in the kitchen at the time so she didn't need to know about Avery's new clothes.
They went up to the attic where Avery removed the golden bands, earrings, tiara and fabric from her arms. She brushed the rest of the dust off the gown and sat upon her bed. Courage climbed onto the bed and sat beside her, placing a paw on her lap.
She patted the top of his head and said, "Thanks for that boy. Can't believe I was actually falling for that weird creep. Why didn't his damn thing warn me about him?"
She glared down at the bracelet in disgust and decided to lie back in bed. Courage wished that he could tell her about the manipulation of the bracelet that he had heard the Goose say he had done to it, but he knew that she wouldn't be able to understand what he had to say.
"Still, I did get this nice dress out of this and this jewelry too. But boy, lets never speak of this again. That guy was way too weird and creepy, even with Nowhere's standards," she said as stroked the top of Courage's head and listened to her uncle's sobs from outside.
Deciding she'd listened enough, she picked the tiara back up and said, "Think any of this stuff is worth money?"
So yeah, the ending is what really puts the weirdness levels sky high with tis episode. (No pun intended)
I would personally like to thank FirecrackerWolf for the idea involving the Goose God interfering with Avery's bracelet which actually gave me some ideas for future chapters. How it works? We'll find out in the future.
So next chapter is going to be an original chapter. One that I have been planning for quite some time.